Ross E. Lockhart's Blog, page 26
December 25, 2012
My tweets
Mon, 20:23
: A's Fan. Spotted stuck to a post near the LanMart building, downtown Petaluma, CA. http://t.co/KOPgkg0S
Mon, 21:06
: RT @obfpetaluma: Ella says, "Our Best Friends is open 'til three o'clock this afternoon for all your last-minute Christmas needs!" http: ...
Mon, 21:40
: Today's your last day to grab The Pugilist's Holiday for your #Kindle for #Free. Tomorrow it's back to $2.99! http://t.co/wDrSJi5B
Tue, 01:34
: Gotta love an unnerving twist, particularly on Xmas Eve. http://t.co/NcQnj0xS The sight was unnerving, though not half as much as ...
Tue, 02:23
: Sleigh'r: Caramel, fig, & banana nose; toffee, sweet malts, & Red Vines on the tongue. Thick & sticky on the palate. http://t.co/QK8ZuWD7
Tue, 03:09
: Randall wishes you all a Merry Kiss-Pez. http://t.co/KYMxqKcP
Tue, 03:13
: Hello, Kitty. (Or, guess who just reached the White Elephant stage of the family Xmas festivities?) http://t.co/WlMVwxec
Tue, 03:23
: Ben Saven has arrived. We can officially get this Xmas party started. http://t.co/WyLDVKoy
Tue, 03:23
: Hello, Kitty #2. http://t.co/742MRQia
Tue, 03:33
: Hello Kitty and Ben Saven, the inevitable team-up. Cue the wah-wah guitars. http://t.co/0flikKD3
Tue, 04:24
: Free for about three more hours: The Pugilist's Holiday, including zombie story "Xmas Eve of the Living Dead": http://t.co/wDrSJi5B #Kindle
Tue, 07:16
: Great. Now I want pie. http://t.co/U8zmGegN “Brings a fucking zombie into my joint and the son of a bitch wants pie,”
December 24, 2012
My tweets
Sun, 16:25
: Stop the War on Yule! All-father Odin, on his eight-legged steed Sleipnir, leaving gifts in children's boots, is the reason for the season.
Sun, 16:32
: Yule traditions! The ale toasts to Odin, Nj�r�r, and Freyr! The straw goat burning! The hlautbolli, filled to brim with sacrificial blood!
Sun, 16:39
: More Yule traditions! The Wild Hunt across the winter sky, hounding prey. The draugr, roaming the forests and fields, hungering for victims.
Sun, 16:43
: Now it's time for a Yuletide tale. So pour a libation to J�lnir and enjoy "Frontier Death Song," by Laird Barron: http://t.co/RQBHOzPE
Sun, 17:40
: RT @williemeikle: If you've ever read any of my books, nothing would please me more than a wee review on Amazon...
Sun, 21:06
: While it's too late to order Chick Bassist in paperback in time for Xmas, it's not too late to grab it for your Kindle. http://t.co/LqXLvnVr
Sun, 21:10
: While you're filling your Kindle like yer stuffing a stocking, don't forget to grab The Pugilist's Holiday. It's FREE! http://t.co/wDrSJi5B
Sun, 21:34
: RT @Richard_Kadrey: There's still time to get your Vincent Price Christmas tree http://t.co/m7xglzkh
Mon, 01:29
: #Free #Kindle #Xmas collection The Pugilist’s Holiday picks up another four-star Amazon review! Download today! http://t.co/wDrSJi5B
December 23, 2012
My tweets
Sat, 20:36
: Evil Clown. Mixed media: Duct tape, Sharpie, and trash can. Spotted in downtown Petaluma, CA. http://t.co/eK0CXAmW
Sat, 22:34
: Free for #Kindle, just in time for #Xmas: The Pugilist's Holiday and Other Holiday Tales of the Twisted and Grotesque: http://t.co/HXI329Cl
Sat, 22:34
: RT @TheDailyEdge: Nothing says #WarOnChristmas like the Republican Party leaving 98% of the country hanging in the midst of the holiday ...
Sun, 00:45
: There's still time (but just barely) to make it a punk rock Xmas with Amazon One-Day Shipping and CHICK BASSIST. http://t.co/y24jy2xC
Sun, 01:21
: "I'll see you in my dreams," says Mario Lanza. http://t.co/x1rOmebY
Sun, 01:30
: First Press Syrah 2007: Big, jammy nose; earth & ripe berries on the tongue; very dry; gonna make you pucker right up! http://t.co/YgR8Vik4
Sun, 01:48
: Randall rocks out. Put the blame on Jimi Hendrix Band of Gypsys 2, "Hear My Train A Comin'" http://t.co/WCxLo4cI
Sun, 03:19
: Old Rasputin XIV Anniversary: Bourbon-soaked cherry & vanilla nose; complex mouth: roast coffee & malt, bourbon & oak. http://t.co/PE7gwx7G
Sun, 04:16
: RT @Ed_Kurtz_Bleeds: For the late shift: my 60s era supernatural horror/noir CATCH MY KILLER is #free through Monday. http://t.co/XD4g6ld3
December 22, 2012
My tweets
Fri, 14:41
: Good morning! Time for some Xmas stories? The Pugilist's Holiday has climbed to #66 in the FREE Kindle Humor category. http://t.co/HXI329Cl
Fri, 15:45
: RT @seananmcguire: Look, guys, I want an apocalypse as much as the next guy, but this one was never going to happen. It was a nopocalyps ...
Fri, 16:19
: RT @JohnJosephAdams: To celebrate the non-apocalypse, Night Shade is giving away free ebooks of WASTELANDS & other titles: http://t. ...
Fri, 16:27
: Free. Weird. Christmas. Stories. Grab 'em for your Kindle today! http://t.co/HXI329Cl #Free #Weird #Christmas #Stories
Fri, 18:53
: Coz and Effect: Arch Oboler and “The Killer Fruitcake That Ate Petaluma” http://t.co/YHvG06r3
Fri, 19:11
: RT @JMMcDermott: Fall into the Abyss with us! http://t.co/LkGchaSu via @amazon
Fri, 19:12
: RT @williemeikle: Find me on Facebook � http://t.co/mwDChOVc
Fri, 22:12
: RT @TheNewDeal: There Were Armed Guards At Columbine. The Shooters Killed Them With Assault Rifles & Shot Up the School. #NRA #p2 #tcot
Fri, 22:16
: Rue Morgue says The Book of Cthulhu II "exemplifies the richness of Lovecraft's legacy." Order for Xmas Eve delivery! http://t.co/8NuMGv3d
Fri, 22:32
: Has a punk rock song ever changed your life? Has a punk rock book? Order Chick Bassist today for Xmas Eve delivery. http://t.co/y24jy2xC
Fri, 23:59
: Last Minute Holiday Gift Suggestions: The Holidays can be Murder… http://t.co/rdvaWbvv
Sat, 00:57
: The Queen of the Couch... and her giraffe. http://t.co/UnQZgw7p
Sat, 10:36
: Apocalypse-level thunder's rumble sends Elinor scrambling first beneath the covers and then beneath the bed. Giraffe hides in the bathroom. </lj-cut
December 21, 2012
Last Minute Holiday Gift Suggestions: The Holidays can be Murder
I'm drawn to dark stories. Always have been. Rather than tales of sweetness and light, give me a story like "The Monkey's Paw," "A Rose for Emily," or "The Killers." I'm not a violent person, in fact I'm repulsed by real-world violence, but on some level, for a story to hit me the right way, it needs to have something strange and dark about it: An uneasy spirit, a desperate criminal, a murder...
So if your tastes, like mine, are a bit noir, or if you're shopping for a gift for that weird friend or family member with a habit of reading tawdry black-covered books on killers, I've got some recommendations for you...
A Parliament of Crows, by Alan M. Clark:
Murder, fraud, suicide, war, isolation, madness, duty, pride, love, loyalty.
From World Fantasy Award winner Alan M. Clark comes a godforsaken southern gothic based on the three most evil sisters in history. They are the Mortlow sisters, and they do it all for the family.
Of Thimble and Threat: The Life of a Ripper Victim, by Alan M. Clark:
In Victorian London, the greatest city of the richest country in the world, the industrial revolution has created a world of decadence and prosperity, but also one of unimaginable suffering. Ever-present in its streets are rats, parasites, filth, death, decay, danger and sorrow. Catherine Eddowes is found murdered gruesomely in the street. When the police make their report, the only indicators of her life are the possessions carried on her person, likely everything she owned in the world.
In Of Thimble and Threat, Alan M. Clark tells the heartbreaking story of Catherine Eddowes, the fourth victim of Jack the Ripper, explaining the origin and acquisition of the items found with her at the time of her death, chronicling her life from childhood to adulthood, motherhood, her descent into alcoholism, and finally her death.
Of Thimble and Threat is a story of the intense love between a mother and a child, a story of poverty and loss, fierce independence, and unconquerable will. It is the devastating portrayal of a self-perpetuated descent into Hell, a lucid view into the darkest parts of the human heart.
A Pretty Mouth, by Molly Tanzer:
Re-Animator meets The Secret History in this Tale of Sex and Science
Henry Milliner thinks his days of being the school pariah are over forever when he attracts the attention of Wadham College's coolest Fellow Commoner, St John Clement, the Lord Calipash. St John is everything Henry isn't: Brilliant, graceful, rich, universally respected. And as if that wasn't enough, St John is also the leader of the Blithe Company, the clique of Natural Philosophy majors who rule Wadham with style. But when being St John's protege ends up becoming a weirder experience than Henry anticipated -- and the Blithe Company doesn't quite turn out to be the decadent, debauched crew he dreamed of -- Henry has some big decisons to make. Should he beg the forgiveness of his only friend, naive underclassman John Wilmot, 2nd Earl of Rochester, or should he ride it out with St John and try to come out on top?
Tangling with a Calipash is an invariably risky endeavor. From antiquity to the modern era, few who have encountered members of that family have benefited from the acquaintance. If only Henry knew the that Calipashes are notorious for their history of sinister schemes, lewd larks, and eldritch experiments, he would realize there are way worse things than being unpopular...
Terminal Island, by Walter Greatshell:
As a child, Henry Cadmus lived on Catalina Island, a scenic vacationland off the Southern California coast. But Henry's experiences were far from idyllic. Today, even though Henry has seen firsthand the horrors of war, the ghastly images that haunt his dreams are ones he associates with his childhood... and the island: a snarling pig-man holding a cleaver; a jackal-headed woman on a high balcony, dripping blood; strange occult rituals... and worse. If it was up to Henry, he would avoid the island entirely.
But Henry is returning to Catalina Island. At his wife Ruby's insistence, Henry, Ruby, and their infant daughter are coming to Avalon, so that Henry can face his fears, exorcise his demons, and reconcile with the one he dreads most... his mother.
From Walter Greatshell, author of Xombies comes Terminal Island, a novel of cosmic horror.
Chick Bassist, by Ross E. Lockhart
Making a killing in rock and roll can be murder...
"Chick Bassist is utterly savage. Lockhart's style waxes poetic as a modern Beat giving us a glimpse into Rock & Roll hell." - Laird Barron, Shirley Jackson Award-winning author of Occultation and The Croning
Erin Locke, the Queen of Rock, wakes up at the crack of noon.
"La Cucaracha" has infested her dream, and now echoes through her hotel room. "What the fuck is that?" Erin's voice is muffled by the thick blankets that completely cover her. Beside the lump that is Erin lies a black Ibanez bass guitar. A Heroes for Goats sticker adorns its reflective surface. Erin thrusts one arm out from beneath the blankets and fumbles for the nonexistent alarm clock. She's still slogging off fragments of her dream, that goddamn recurrent creep-out where she's a praying mantis, translucent green, perched on the crest of a burning city, devouring her still-copulating preymate. This time her meal had worn her father's face. Those dreams were the worst.
Chick Bassist welcomes you into punk rock hell, the friendless disillusionment of waking up in a shitty motel room in California with half a joint and an empty six-pack, radio blaring Lou Reed, concrete ocean on all sides and a blazing inferno within.
Originally posted at Hares Rock Lots.
So if your tastes, like mine, are a bit noir, or if you're shopping for a gift for that weird friend or family member with a habit of reading tawdry black-covered books on killers, I've got some recommendations for you...
A Parliament of Crows, by Alan M. Clark:
Murder, fraud, suicide, war, isolation, madness, duty, pride, love, loyalty.
From World Fantasy Award winner Alan M. Clark comes a godforsaken southern gothic based on the three most evil sisters in history. They are the Mortlow sisters, and they do it all for the family.
Of Thimble and Threat: The Life of a Ripper Victim, by Alan M. Clark:
In Victorian London, the greatest city of the richest country in the world, the industrial revolution has created a world of decadence and prosperity, but also one of unimaginable suffering. Ever-present in its streets are rats, parasites, filth, death, decay, danger and sorrow. Catherine Eddowes is found murdered gruesomely in the street. When the police make their report, the only indicators of her life are the possessions carried on her person, likely everything she owned in the world.
In Of Thimble and Threat, Alan M. Clark tells the heartbreaking story of Catherine Eddowes, the fourth victim of Jack the Ripper, explaining the origin and acquisition of the items found with her at the time of her death, chronicling her life from childhood to adulthood, motherhood, her descent into alcoholism, and finally her death.
Of Thimble and Threat is a story of the intense love between a mother and a child, a story of poverty and loss, fierce independence, and unconquerable will. It is the devastating portrayal of a self-perpetuated descent into Hell, a lucid view into the darkest parts of the human heart.
A Pretty Mouth, by Molly Tanzer:
Re-Animator meets The Secret History in this Tale of Sex and Science
Henry Milliner thinks his days of being the school pariah are over forever when he attracts the attention of Wadham College's coolest Fellow Commoner, St John Clement, the Lord Calipash. St John is everything Henry isn't: Brilliant, graceful, rich, universally respected. And as if that wasn't enough, St John is also the leader of the Blithe Company, the clique of Natural Philosophy majors who rule Wadham with style. But when being St John's protege ends up becoming a weirder experience than Henry anticipated -- and the Blithe Company doesn't quite turn out to be the decadent, debauched crew he dreamed of -- Henry has some big decisons to make. Should he beg the forgiveness of his only friend, naive underclassman John Wilmot, 2nd Earl of Rochester, or should he ride it out with St John and try to come out on top?
Tangling with a Calipash is an invariably risky endeavor. From antiquity to the modern era, few who have encountered members of that family have benefited from the acquaintance. If only Henry knew the that Calipashes are notorious for their history of sinister schemes, lewd larks, and eldritch experiments, he would realize there are way worse things than being unpopular...
Terminal Island, by Walter Greatshell:
As a child, Henry Cadmus lived on Catalina Island, a scenic vacationland off the Southern California coast. But Henry's experiences were far from idyllic. Today, even though Henry has seen firsthand the horrors of war, the ghastly images that haunt his dreams are ones he associates with his childhood... and the island: a snarling pig-man holding a cleaver; a jackal-headed woman on a high balcony, dripping blood; strange occult rituals... and worse. If it was up to Henry, he would avoid the island entirely.
But Henry is returning to Catalina Island. At his wife Ruby's insistence, Henry, Ruby, and their infant daughter are coming to Avalon, so that Henry can face his fears, exorcise his demons, and reconcile with the one he dreads most... his mother.
From Walter Greatshell, author of Xombies comes Terminal Island, a novel of cosmic horror.
Chick Bassist, by Ross E. Lockhart
Making a killing in rock and roll can be murder...
"Chick Bassist is utterly savage. Lockhart's style waxes poetic as a modern Beat giving us a glimpse into Rock & Roll hell." - Laird Barron, Shirley Jackson Award-winning author of Occultation and The Croning
Erin Locke, the Queen of Rock, wakes up at the crack of noon.
"La Cucaracha" has infested her dream, and now echoes through her hotel room. "What the fuck is that?" Erin's voice is muffled by the thick blankets that completely cover her. Beside the lump that is Erin lies a black Ibanez bass guitar. A Heroes for Goats sticker adorns its reflective surface. Erin thrusts one arm out from beneath the blankets and fumbles for the nonexistent alarm clock. She's still slogging off fragments of her dream, that goddamn recurrent creep-out where she's a praying mantis, translucent green, perched on the crest of a burning city, devouring her still-copulating preymate. This time her meal had worn her father's face. Those dreams were the worst.
Chick Bassist welcomes you into punk rock hell, the friendless disillusionment of waking up in a shitty motel room in California with half a joint and an empty six-pack, radio blaring Lou Reed, concrete ocean on all sides and a blazing inferno within.
Originally posted at Hares Rock Lots.
Coz and Effect: Arch Oboler and "The Killer Fruitcake That Ate Petaluma"
I blame Bill Cosby. Yes, that Bill Cosby. Before Coz was "Cliff" Huxtable, Mother, Fat Albert, or the Jell-O Pudding Pop pitchman, he was a very funny guy, a stand-up comedian, and the track "Chicken Heart," from his 1966 album Wonderfulness, was my first exposure--albeit secondhand--to the storytelling genius of American playwright, screenwriter, novelist, producer, and director Arch Oboler.
While Cosby futzes a number of the details in his retelling of Oboler's 1937 radio drama "The Chicken Heart," his routine stands as one of the most original and memorable accounts of a young child's formative encounters with not just horror, but cosmic horror. For Oboler's is a horror story that works on many levels: absurdist cautionary tale, Grand Guignol, "what if?" speculative sci-fi, newspaper noir, and apocalyptic cosmic joke. And I credit--and blame--Cosby for leading me to Oboler, and Lights Out, and my lifelong obsession with weird fiction and cosmic horror.
In mid-2007, David Templeton asked me to write a story for that year's Twisted Christmas showcase at Santa Rosa's Glaser Center. The result, my tribute to Coz and Mr. O alike (not to mention my adopted home town) was “The Killer Fruitcake That Ate Petaluma.” The story was performed--in full-on ear-cupping 1940s radio announcer style--by West Coast Live radio personality Sedge Thomson on December 8, 2007.
"The Killer Fruitcake That Ate Petaluma" opens my mini collection, The Pugilist's Holiday and Other Holiday Tales of the Twisted and Grotesque , which is currently free to download for the Amazon Kindle, my Xmas gift to you.
And, just to give you an incentive to download and read "The Killer Fruitcake That Ate Petaluma", if you're one of the first three people to review The Pugilist’s Holiday and Other Holiday Tales of the Twisted and Grotesque , you can win your choice of a signed copy of The Book of Cthulhu, The Book of Cthulhu II, or Chick Bassist! Download, read, review, and send me a link to win!
While Cosby futzes a number of the details in his retelling of Oboler's 1937 radio drama "The Chicken Heart," his routine stands as one of the most original and memorable accounts of a young child's formative encounters with not just horror, but cosmic horror. For Oboler's is a horror story that works on many levels: absurdist cautionary tale, Grand Guignol, "what if?" speculative sci-fi, newspaper noir, and apocalyptic cosmic joke. And I credit--and blame--Cosby for leading me to Oboler, and Lights Out, and my lifelong obsession with weird fiction and cosmic horror.
In mid-2007, David Templeton asked me to write a story for that year's Twisted Christmas showcase at Santa Rosa's Glaser Center. The result, my tribute to Coz and Mr. O alike (not to mention my adopted home town) was “The Killer Fruitcake That Ate Petaluma.” The story was performed--in full-on ear-cupping 1940s radio announcer style--by West Coast Live radio personality Sedge Thomson on December 8, 2007.
"The Killer Fruitcake That Ate Petaluma" opens my mini collection, The Pugilist's Holiday and Other Holiday Tales of the Twisted and Grotesque , which is currently free to download for the Amazon Kindle, my Xmas gift to you.
And, just to give you an incentive to download and read "The Killer Fruitcake That Ate Petaluma", if you're one of the first three people to review The Pugilist’s Holiday and Other Holiday Tales of the Twisted and Grotesque , you can win your choice of a signed copy of The Book of Cthulhu, The Book of Cthulhu II, or Chick Bassist! Download, read, review, and send me a link to win!
My tweets
Thu, 15:47
: Here's my Xmas gift to you! THE PUGILIST'S HOLIDAY, strange holiday stories for weird readers. Now FREE for Kindle! http://t.co/HXI329Cl
Thu, 18:16
: RT @YourAnonNews: █████ ████ everything ███ █████ is█████ ████ fine ████ ███ ██████ love █████ █ your █ ████ government. #Anonymous
Thu, 18:17
: Strange. Murray Media is selling a used copy of Chick Bassist for $60.33 Makes me wonder what they used it for. http://t.co/y24jy2xC
Thu, 18:45
: Be one of the first three reviews of The Pugilist's Holiday & win your choice of TBoC I, II, or Chick Bassist! Signed! http://t.co/HXI329Cl
Thu, 19:44
: RT @ChrstphrReynaga: "Relax Everyone – we've got it handled!" said the two Mayans in line at Barnes and Noble. They had picked up the... ...
Thu, 21:14
: RT @StoreAmerican: The Pugilist's Holiday (Kindle Edition)By Ross E. Lockhart Buy new: $0.00 First tagg... http://t.co/HFK ...
Thu, 21:15
: RT @christmasteam: The Pugilist's Holiday (Kindle Edition)By Ross E. Lockhart Buy new: $0.00 Firs... http://t.co/PkF5WjeX ...
Thu, 22:39
: THE PUGILIST'S HOLIDAY has just cracked Amazon's top 4000! Currently #3,965 Free in Kindle Store. Can we go lower? http://t.co/HXI329Cl
Thu, 23:03
: RT @TheNewDeal: Congress Gets Six-Figure Salaries, Govt Healthcare & Benefits That We Pay For. Want to Make Cuts? Start There. #NoSo ...
Fri, 00:21
: Last Minute Holiday Gift Suggestions: Kaiju Edition… http://t.co/U8SC5ob1
Fri, 00:46
: My feline neighbor just came Christmas caroling. "Shrimps shrimps shrimps, shrimps shrimps shrimps, shrimps mrow mrow!" http://t.co/p9RHnyzG
Fri, 02:38
: Same monster, new location. http://t.co/wo1b3aPx
Fri, 02:48
: Tucking into a Little Sumpin' from @lagunitasbruhws, pizza, and garlic bread with a pair of Jennifers at @Brixxptown. http://t.co/AJUEIppM
Fri, 04:23
: Conjoined twins. Spotted near the Petaluma Library Museum. http://t.co/aJZcJ5Vn
Fri, 04:31
: RT @Free_UK_eBooks: #FREE The Pugilist's Holiday by Ross E. Lockhart: A boxer must go toe-to-toe with a jolly old el... http://t.co/6AKX ...
Fri, 04:36
: How low can it go? The Pugilist’s Holiday currently #2,618 Free in Kindle Store. Get it now, before the fat man visits! http://t.co/HXI329Cl
Fri, 04:39
: Holy Hava Nagila! Just realized that The Pugilist's Holiday is #79 in the Amazon Kindle Humor category! Top 100, baby! http://t.co/HXI329Cl
December 20, 2012
Last Minute Holiday Gift Suggestions: Kaiju Edition
If you're anything like me, you love giant monsters. From King Kong to Cthulhu and everything in between, the humongous "strange beasts" of Kaiju cinema and literature have captivated and entertained us by flattenin' cities and wrasslin' with one another for the better part of a century.
So here are a few gift suggestions to my monster-loving friends. Because really, short of suiting up and stomping a cardboard city of your own design, what could be more fun than watching or reading about giant monsters?
All-Monster Action!, by Cody Goodfellow:
"A tour-de-force! Goodfellow's latest is his best yet. Compulsive, breakneck reading!" -BRIAN KEENE, author of The Rising and Ghoul
IT'S THEIR WORLD... NOW GET THE FUCK OFF!
Whether on the sun-kissed beaches of a nameless South Pacific paradise or in the suffocating dungeons of retail Hell, the misfits of evolution and mistakes of misbegotten science are battling, breeding, and feeding. And they're looking at you...
COMING ATTRACTIONS!
They came seeking cheap thrills and interspecies recreational sex, but they reaped a whirlwind of clusterfuckery when they toyed with the unspeakable forces of monster lust. From the idyllic nostalgia of WW2 to the thoroughly bat-shit future, witness the wages of sin and mutation as you've never seen them before (unless you read them previously in the periodicals or anthologies in which they first appeared)!
OUR MAIN FEATURE!
The world gave him a blank check and a demand: Create giant monsters to fight our wars. But Dr. Otaku was not satisfied with mere chaos and mass destruction.... Even as his subversively delicious kaiju creatures undermined the very fabric of American life, he hatched a scheme to animate the cities themselves and inaugurate a new dark age of mega-monster abominations who would finally give humanity the ass-whipping it deserved. Now only one man, riding inside the skull of a much larger man, stands between us and the planet-devastating madness of...
ALL-MONSTER ACTION!
Enormity, by W. G. Marshall (AKA Walter Greatshell):
ENORMITY is the strange tale of an American working in Korea, a lonely young man named Manny Lopes, who is not only physically small (in his own words, he's a "Creole shrimp"), but his work, his failed marriage, his race, all conspire to make him feel puny and insignificant - the proverbial ninety-eight-pound weakling.
Then one day an accident happens, a quantum explosion, and suddenly Manny awakens to discover that he is big - really big. In fact, Manny is enormous, a mile-high colossus!
Now there's no stopping him: he's a one-man weapon of mass destruction. Yet he means well.
ENORMITY takes some odd turns, featuring characters like surfing gangbangers, elderly terrorists, and a North Korean assassin who thinks she's Dorothy from The Wizard of Oz. There's also sex, violence, and action galore, as Manny battles the forces the seek to seduce or destroy him.
Who will survive? Who will be annihilated? Read ENORMITY and find out!
Super Giant Monster Time!, by Jeff Burk:
Will you escape the giant monsters that are rampaging the fuck out of your city? Aliens are invading the Earth and their ray guns turn people into violent punk rockers. At the same time, the city is being overtaken by giant monsters tougher than Godzilla and Mothra combined. You can choose to be a lone scientist trapped in a secret government lab on a remote island swarming with monstrous killer insects, a badass punk rock chick with a green mohawk caught in a bar room brawl as the city goes up in flames around her, or a desk jockey forced to endure tedious office duties while his building is being attacked by a gargantuan centipede with claws the size of sports utility vehicles. Which character will you become? To become the scientist, turn to page 149. To become the punk chick, turn to page 11. To become the office drone, turn to page 77. But choose wisely! You might conquer a fleet of alien saucers with the help of a high-flying monster-slicing super cat or drown in a giant monster's pool of sperm as it butt-fucks your office building. What will happen next? That's up to you! When the story hits a fork in the road, you get to choose which path to take. The ending will always be different depending on your decisions. Not only that, you can read this book over and over again for a new experience every time!
Godzilla
Ishiro Honda’s Godzilla is the roaring granddaddy of all monster movies. It’s also a remarkably humane and melancholy drama made in Japan at a time when the country was still reeling from nuclear attack and H-bomb testing. Its rampaging radioactive beast, the poignant embodiment of an entire population’s fears, became a beloved international icon of destruction, spawning more than twenty sequels and spinoffs. This first thrilling, tactile spectacle continues to be a cult phenomenon; here, we present the original, 1954 Japanese version, along with Godzilla: King of the Monsters!, the 1956 American reworking starring Raymond Burr (Rear Window).
The Pugilist's Holiday and Other Holiday Tales of the Twisted and Grotesque, by Ross E. Lockhart:
The only selection on this list with a kaiju fruitcake... just in time for Xmas!
A boxer must go toe-to-toe with a jolly old elf and his devastating left hook. A seemingly-innocent holiday confection grows to enormous size, threatening a scenic Northern California town. The reanimated dead rise from their graves, bringing terror to a season previously known for peace on earth and goodwill toward men. These are the weird worlds contained within The Pugilist’s Holiday and Other Holiday Tales of the Twisted and Grotesque, a collection of short Christmas stories inspired by Arch Oboler, Robert E. Howard, and George A. Romero.
Originally posted at Hares Rock Lots.
So here are a few gift suggestions to my monster-loving friends. Because really, short of suiting up and stomping a cardboard city of your own design, what could be more fun than watching or reading about giant monsters?
All-Monster Action!, by Cody Goodfellow:
"A tour-de-force! Goodfellow's latest is his best yet. Compulsive, breakneck reading!" -BRIAN KEENE, author of The Rising and Ghoul
IT'S THEIR WORLD... NOW GET THE FUCK OFF!
Whether on the sun-kissed beaches of a nameless South Pacific paradise or in the suffocating dungeons of retail Hell, the misfits of evolution and mistakes of misbegotten science are battling, breeding, and feeding. And they're looking at you...
COMING ATTRACTIONS!
They came seeking cheap thrills and interspecies recreational sex, but they reaped a whirlwind of clusterfuckery when they toyed with the unspeakable forces of monster lust. From the idyllic nostalgia of WW2 to the thoroughly bat-shit future, witness the wages of sin and mutation as you've never seen them before (unless you read them previously in the periodicals or anthologies in which they first appeared)!
OUR MAIN FEATURE!
The world gave him a blank check and a demand: Create giant monsters to fight our wars. But Dr. Otaku was not satisfied with mere chaos and mass destruction.... Even as his subversively delicious kaiju creatures undermined the very fabric of American life, he hatched a scheme to animate the cities themselves and inaugurate a new dark age of mega-monster abominations who would finally give humanity the ass-whipping it deserved. Now only one man, riding inside the skull of a much larger man, stands between us and the planet-devastating madness of...
ALL-MONSTER ACTION!
Enormity, by W. G. Marshall (AKA Walter Greatshell):
ENORMITY is the strange tale of an American working in Korea, a lonely young man named Manny Lopes, who is not only physically small (in his own words, he's a "Creole shrimp"), but his work, his failed marriage, his race, all conspire to make him feel puny and insignificant - the proverbial ninety-eight-pound weakling.
Then one day an accident happens, a quantum explosion, and suddenly Manny awakens to discover that he is big - really big. In fact, Manny is enormous, a mile-high colossus!
Now there's no stopping him: he's a one-man weapon of mass destruction. Yet he means well.
ENORMITY takes some odd turns, featuring characters like surfing gangbangers, elderly terrorists, and a North Korean assassin who thinks she's Dorothy from The Wizard of Oz. There's also sex, violence, and action galore, as Manny battles the forces the seek to seduce or destroy him.
Who will survive? Who will be annihilated? Read ENORMITY and find out!
Super Giant Monster Time!, by Jeff Burk:
Will you escape the giant monsters that are rampaging the fuck out of your city? Aliens are invading the Earth and their ray guns turn people into violent punk rockers. At the same time, the city is being overtaken by giant monsters tougher than Godzilla and Mothra combined. You can choose to be a lone scientist trapped in a secret government lab on a remote island swarming with monstrous killer insects, a badass punk rock chick with a green mohawk caught in a bar room brawl as the city goes up in flames around her, or a desk jockey forced to endure tedious office duties while his building is being attacked by a gargantuan centipede with claws the size of sports utility vehicles. Which character will you become? To become the scientist, turn to page 149. To become the punk chick, turn to page 11. To become the office drone, turn to page 77. But choose wisely! You might conquer a fleet of alien saucers with the help of a high-flying monster-slicing super cat or drown in a giant monster's pool of sperm as it butt-fucks your office building. What will happen next? That's up to you! When the story hits a fork in the road, you get to choose which path to take. The ending will always be different depending on your decisions. Not only that, you can read this book over and over again for a new experience every time!
Godzilla
Ishiro Honda’s Godzilla is the roaring granddaddy of all monster movies. It’s also a remarkably humane and melancholy drama made in Japan at a time when the country was still reeling from nuclear attack and H-bomb testing. Its rampaging radioactive beast, the poignant embodiment of an entire population’s fears, became a beloved international icon of destruction, spawning more than twenty sequels and spinoffs. This first thrilling, tactile spectacle continues to be a cult phenomenon; here, we present the original, 1954 Japanese version, along with Godzilla: King of the Monsters!, the 1956 American reworking starring Raymond Burr (Rear Window).
The Pugilist's Holiday and Other Holiday Tales of the Twisted and Grotesque, by Ross E. Lockhart:
The only selection on this list with a kaiju fruitcake... just in time for Xmas!
A boxer must go toe-to-toe with a jolly old elf and his devastating left hook. A seemingly-innocent holiday confection grows to enormous size, threatening a scenic Northern California town. The reanimated dead rise from their graves, bringing terror to a season previously known for peace on earth and goodwill toward men. These are the weird worlds contained within The Pugilist’s Holiday and Other Holiday Tales of the Twisted and Grotesque, a collection of short Christmas stories inspired by Arch Oboler, Robert E. Howard, and George A. Romero.
Originally posted at Hares Rock Lots.
My Xmas Gift to You: The Pugilist's Holiday is FREE for the next five days!
Here's my Xmas gift to you!
The Pugilist’s Holiday and Other Holiday Tales of the Twisted and Grotesque
, my mini collection of strange holiday stories for weird readers, is now FREE for Kindle!
The Pugilist's Holiday
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Here's my Xmas gift to you! <a href="http://www.amazon.com/dp/B009JYLIWW/?..." title="Check out this item on Amazon" target="_blank"><em>The Pugilist’s Holiday and Other Holiday Tales of the Twisted and Grotesque</em></a>, my mini collection of strange holiday stories for weird readers, is now FREE for Kindle!
<a href="http://www.amazon.com/dp/B009JYLIWW/?..." title="Check out this item on Amazon" target="_blank"><strong><em>The Pugilist's Holiday</em></strong></a>
<a href="http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B00..." title="The Pugilist's Holiday" rel="lightbox"><img src="http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B00..." class="alignright alt="The Pugilist's Holiday" /></a>
A boxer must go toe-to-toe with a jolly old elf and his devastating left hook. A seemingly-innocent holiday confection grows to enormous size, threatening a scenic Northern California town. The reanimated dead rise from their graves, bringing terror to a season previously known for peace on earth and goodwill toward men. These are the weird worlds contained within <a href="http://www.amazon.com/dp/B009JYLIWW/?..." title="Check out this item on Amazon" target="_blank"><em>The Pugilist’s Holiday and Other Holiday Tales of the Twisted and Grotesque</em></a>, a collection of short Christmas stories inspired by Arch Oboler, Robert E. Howard, and George A. Romero.
The Pugilist's Holiday
[Error: Irreparable invalid markup ('<img [...] pugilist's>') in entry. Owner must fix manually. Raw contents below.]
Here's my Xmas gift to you! <a href="http://www.amazon.com/dp/B009JYLIWW/?..." title="Check out this item on Amazon" target="_blank"><em>The Pugilist’s Holiday and Other Holiday Tales of the Twisted and Grotesque</em></a>, my mini collection of strange holiday stories for weird readers, is now FREE for Kindle!
<a href="http://www.amazon.com/dp/B009JYLIWW/?..." title="Check out this item on Amazon" target="_blank"><strong><em>The Pugilist's Holiday</em></strong></a>
<a href="http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B00..." title="The Pugilist's Holiday" rel="lightbox"><img src="http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B00..." class="alignright alt="The Pugilist's Holiday" /></a>
A boxer must go toe-to-toe with a jolly old elf and his devastating left hook. A seemingly-innocent holiday confection grows to enormous size, threatening a scenic Northern California town. The reanimated dead rise from their graves, bringing terror to a season previously known for peace on earth and goodwill toward men. These are the weird worlds contained within <a href="http://www.amazon.com/dp/B009JYLIWW/?..." title="Check out this item on Amazon" target="_blank"><em>The Pugilist’s Holiday and Other Holiday Tales of the Twisted and Grotesque</em></a>, a collection of short Christmas stories inspired by Arch Oboler, Robert E. Howard, and George A. Romero.
My tweets
Wed, 16:44
: Rock and Roll: I fell asleep reading Fungi, dreamed of a mushroom marching band, angel’s-trumpet trumpets blaring... http://t.co/FIRj9QYf
Wed, 16:56
: I'm Mario Lanza's mother... and that boy sure can a-sing! http://t.co/65Zcg3il
Wed, 17:03
: RT @YANBackUp: #Breaking: @Twitter has suspended @YourAnonNews. #YAN #Anonymous
Wed, 18:28
: In case you missed it last week, David Templeton and I talk about Xmas flick Rise of the Guardians in the Pacific Sun: http://t.co/bhjGbomj
Wed, 19:29
: RT @toyns: Just found this new app that tells you which of your family members are racist. It's called Facebook.
Wed, 22:03
: RT @NovaWildstar: @dakegra I would be a very bad friend if I didn’t pimp @lossrockhart’s book http://t.co/YdsDSDie
Wed, 22:13
: RT @dakegra: @lossrockhart @NovaWildstar It amuses me that it's �6.66 in the UK.
Wed, 22:47
: RT @sfsignal: Books received: http://t.co/4rfbxKc9
Wed, 23:07
: Rock & Roll… http://t.co/ekmaK8cN
Wed, 23:24
: RT @MorganScorpion: https://t.co/eZgh8sre The illustration for the cover of W H Pugmire's next book: Bohemians of Sesqua Valley. It has ...
Thu, 01:05
: RT @FEARnet: Gift Guide: The Vampyre LEGO Hearse! Check it out here: http://t.co/4k7a4vOI
Thu, 03:49
: Now this is bicycling! Velopresso: A Bike Powered Espresso Bar http://t.co/n1ETT1DW
Thu, 08:21
: Were you weened on rock & roll? Try this literary punk rock concept album: Chick Bassist: http://t.co/y24jy2xC </lj-cut
