Marty Nemko's Blog, page 317

To Be Awakened

Ah to be awakened. perhaps by the sunrise, a lover’s touch, or often in my case, my doggie licking my face saying, “I want to go out.”


Of course, those are mere literal awakenings. More interesting are awakened ideas.

As my PsychologyToday.com article today, I offer some of my clients', colleagues', friends', and my recent awakenings, changed views.  

I've chosen to include a wide range to make it more likely that one or more will resonate with you or trigger an awakening of your own.

Staying Grounded in a Negotiation

Employers and employees can lose perspective and even their cool in a negotiation. In my PsychologyToday.com article today, I try to help.

Good Public Speaking Without Fear

A core reason that people fear public speaking is that they're scared of screwing up and thus looking foolish. 

That fear is valid if you're trying to be "perfect"--scripting and when near-memorizing. You're bound to get thrown off.

Fortunately, unless you're a master at reading off a teleprompter, the best talks are not scripted, nor memorized. They're given largely ad-lib, with just a brief outline to keep you on track.

I offer a step-by-step process in my PsychologyToday.com article today.

In Praise of Nuance in a World that Values Black-and-White Thinking

At times, we all have to opine on difficult subjects: at work and outside of work. 

And when doing so, because we understandably are affected by our leaders, we may be tempted to use what works for politicians: reducing complexity to black-and-white sound-bites and sounding very sure of ourselves. Often, that mitigates against the required nuance.

As a modest attempt to encourage all of us to move toward more nuance, and hopefully to make the case in a way more interesting than lecturing at you in typical how-to article style, my PsychologyToday.com article today offers what an nuanced set of responses to an interview of a presidential candidate might look like.

Halloween Costumes as a Tool for Personal Growth

Halloween costume parties offer us a ready opportunity to try on an under-expressed part of our personality or even a persona we'd never want to assume in real life.

As my PsychologyToday.com article today, I offer examples of costumes that differ from a person's personality and ways to make the experience a tool for personal growth.

Using Job Simulations: Key to hiring wisely

Despite a mountain of evidence that the job interview is a poor way to choose employees, we continue to use it.

Key to hiring wisely is using simulations of difficult tasks that the employee will often have to do. As with most things, the devil is in the details so in my PsychologyToday.com article today, I was quite granular.

On Being a Rabid Sports Fan

Of course, one cannot generalize from one fan's reportage but as my PsychologyToday.com article today, I recount the exchange I had today with my lifelong friend, who is a rabid Dodgers fan. I found it instructive.

On Being Unattractive: Upsides, Downsides, and Compensating

Lookism is the last ism that goes unpunished. My PsychologyToday.com article today explores the upsides and downsides of having an unattractive face and what you might do about it.

Stoicism Doesn’t Mean Emotionless: An under-considered approach to life

Many people think Stoicism is merely a synonym for "emotionless" or, at most, a dusty ancient-Greek philosophy.

While, yes, Stoicism originated with such ancient illuminati as Seneca, Epictetus, and Marcus Aurelius, it's far beyond “emotionless."

And Stoicism is more widely adopted today than one might think: from the New England Patriots and Seattle Seahawks staff to rapper LL Cool J and broadcaster Michele Tafoya.

Plus, Stoicism's devotees have included some of history's most admired people: George Washington, Walt Whitman, Frederick the Great, Eugene Delacroix, Adam Smith, Immanuel Kant, Thomas Jefferson, Theodore Roosevelt, and Ralph Waldo Emerson. 

What is Stoicism? It asks us to do good while staying calm, to focus on what’s important and under our control, not wasting thoughts let alone time on what’s beyond our control.
Easier said than done, especially with all the modern pressures that beset even successful people. 

To help, Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman have written the just-published book, The Daily Stoic: 366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance, and the Art of Living. 

For each day of the year, this beautiful book (complete with ribbon bookmark) offers a quote from a top ancient Stoic followed by Holiday’s commentary to elucidate its relevance to us today.

My PsychologyToday.com article today offers some nuggets I've extracted from the book.

A Potpourri of Career Questions

A reader asked me a number of career questions. I've answered them all as my PsychologyToday.com article today.