Samantha Wilde's Blog, page 5
October 29, 2012
What kind of a minister ARE you?
I get this question all the time.
Here are some of my answers in my weekly online radio broadcast: You Are Loved.
You can listen to any archived episode. You can also find out more about that part of my life at agapeinterfaith.blogspot.com where I list the weekly episodes.
I like to think that I'm living proof that liberal, intelligent, feminist, spiritual folk walk the planet. I suppose you need to add "zany" to that list.
And here I am, mid-sentence, during a service I led at the North Hadley Congregational Church.
Thanks to Bruce Brewer for the photograph!
I don't know that this picture captures my best moment. Sometimes I think about wearing a sign around my neck: I'm better looking than this. Ever have days like that?
Here are some of my answers in my weekly online radio broadcast: You Are Loved.
You can listen to any archived episode. You can also find out more about that part of my life at agapeinterfaith.blogspot.com where I list the weekly episodes.
I like to think that I'm living proof that liberal, intelligent, feminist, spiritual folk walk the planet. I suppose you need to add "zany" to that list.
And here I am, mid-sentence, during a service I led at the North Hadley Congregational Church.
Thanks to Bruce Brewer for the photograph!I don't know that this picture captures my best moment. Sometimes I think about wearing a sign around my neck: I'm better looking than this. Ever have days like that?
October 24, 2012
I'll Take What She Has
Here's the cover for I'll Take What She Has!! Tell me what you think.
I love it and I want to know what you think.
Take the poll. Scroll down a bit on your left and you'll find it.
The book will be out a few weeks after Valentine's day. You can PRE-ORDER because it's already on Amazon and that, my friends, is the amazing world of technology for you.
I love it and I want to know what you think.
Take the poll. Scroll down a bit on your left and you'll find it.
The book will be out a few weeks after Valentine's day. You can PRE-ORDER because it's already on Amazon and that, my friends, is the amazing world of technology for you.
October 22, 2012
Top Ten Reasons You Think You Aren't a Feminist AND...
10. Wasn't feminism something that happened in the 70s?
9. You haven't slept with a woman and you thought it was a requirement of membership.
8. You like having sex.
7. You like wearing nail polish.
6. You buy pink things, small pink things.
5. You vote Republican.
4. Your mother told you you weren't.
3. Don't you have to cut off a boob or something?* (see below)
2. You're not oppressed.
And the number one reason you think you're not a feminist:
1. You're a mother! And those zany feminists who wrote all the books twenty years ago only talked about ESCAPING motherhood. They forgot to write YOU into their future predictions. Woops! Talk about a major oversight. They also kind of made it a liberal thing and now the term "conservative feminist" is an oxymoron. Woops again! But this is an error that can be fixed by--you guessed it!
The to 2 reasons you ARE a feminist (but never knew it):
2. You're a woman.
1. You're a woman.
Here I am with one of my fav books of all time: Sex and Destiny by Germaine Greer, subtitled, "the politics of human fertility" which is kind of a good theme for the conversations I have with my husband some days!
*That's Amazons, not feminists.
9. You haven't slept with a woman and you thought it was a requirement of membership.
8. You like having sex.
7. You like wearing nail polish.
6. You buy pink things, small pink things.
5. You vote Republican.
4. Your mother told you you weren't.
3. Don't you have to cut off a boob or something?* (see below)
2. You're not oppressed.
And the number one reason you think you're not a feminist:
1. You're a mother! And those zany feminists who wrote all the books twenty years ago only talked about ESCAPING motherhood. They forgot to write YOU into their future predictions. Woops! Talk about a major oversight. They also kind of made it a liberal thing and now the term "conservative feminist" is an oxymoron. Woops again! But this is an error that can be fixed by--you guessed it!
The to 2 reasons you ARE a feminist (but never knew it):
2. You're a woman.
1. You're a woman.
Here I am with one of my fav books of all time: Sex and Destiny by Germaine Greer, subtitled, "the politics of human fertility" which is kind of a good theme for the conversations I have with my husband some days!*That's Amazons, not feminists.
October 16, 2012
Top Ten Reason Motherhood Make You Feel Like a Failure
10. It involves a lot of poop.
9. And cleaning of toilets.
8.Your quarterly reviews come from someone in diapers.
7. Someone else does it better (AND she puts pictures of herself doing it so well online).
6. You missed the motherhood class because you were too busy taking the stupid required math and science courses.
5. It involves late-night training.
4. No one under twenty appreciates a healthy meal.
3. You will hear the words, "Mom, I hate you," often enough to effect your self-esteem (but luckily not your Facebook friend-o-meter. And thank God, you need real friends when you have to live with the enemy!)
2. You can't freeze dry them on that one perfect day to preserve forever, probably on the mantel, or maybe hanging above it.
1. No matter how hard you try, ultimately: THEY HAVE A MIND OF THEIR OWN!
Oh, look, here I am, being the perfect, most successful mother to one of my "kids!"
9. And cleaning of toilets.
8.Your quarterly reviews come from someone in diapers.
7. Someone else does it better (AND she puts pictures of herself doing it so well online).
6. You missed the motherhood class because you were too busy taking the stupid required math and science courses.
5. It involves late-night training.
4. No one under twenty appreciates a healthy meal.
3. You will hear the words, "Mom, I hate you," often enough to effect your self-esteem (but luckily not your Facebook friend-o-meter. And thank God, you need real friends when you have to live with the enemy!)
2. You can't freeze dry them on that one perfect day to preserve forever, probably on the mantel, or maybe hanging above it.
1. No matter how hard you try, ultimately: THEY HAVE A MIND OF THEIR OWN!
Oh, look, here I am, being the perfect, most successful mother to one of my "kids!"
October 8, 2012
Top Ten Reasons I Don't Use Facebook
10. My children are too busy using my computer to track the stock market (keenly interested in the future of their college funds).
9. There isn't a single good picture of me ever taken.
8. I already know how many friends I have (6).
7. I can only upload things on the metaphysical plane.
6. I'm technologically anti-social.
5. I'm building my own hype.
4. I don't have any pictures of my children to share. (We only have oil paintings.)
3. Everyone I know lives on an Amish farm
2. I'm too busy looking at myself in the mirror.
1. I don't want to date any of my old lovers.
Here's an updated photo of me! The most recent one taken.
Take that "friends"! I dare you to look as good as I do. I've got the complexion of a newborn!
Oh, whoops. That's my daughter. Isn't she cute?
Oh, wait a minute. That's my daughter's doll.
Sorry. But I think I've proved my point.
9. There isn't a single good picture of me ever taken.
8. I already know how many friends I have (6).
7. I can only upload things on the metaphysical plane.
6. I'm technologically anti-social.
5. I'm building my own hype.
4. I don't have any pictures of my children to share. (We only have oil paintings.)
3. Everyone I know lives on an Amish farm
2. I'm too busy looking at myself in the mirror.
1. I don't want to date any of my old lovers.
Here's an updated photo of me! The most recent one taken.Take that "friends"! I dare you to look as good as I do. I've got the complexion of a newborn!
Oh, whoops. That's my daughter. Isn't she cute?
Oh, wait a minute. That's my daughter's doll.
Sorry. But I think I've proved my point.
October 1, 2012
This is SOO scary!
Right now, the fear is EEE (fatal disease you get from mosquitoes. My area is now on high alert).
We also went through the swine (I was trying to get pregnant then and pregnant women were at high risk).
One time, my third child actually choked on an apple and my friend, a PA had to smack his back to save his life.
Also, yesterday, my daughter fell in the toilet because my son forgot to put down the seat. Oh, woops! That's not scary after all, because you only die if you fall in HEAD first.
Why is this woman smiling? Because she's not afraid of everything! (She's Lenore Skenazy, that's why.)
People LOVE to scare mothers, because we are so very, very good at neurotic paranoia. I do have friends who are afraid to let their children play outside due to the high rate of suburban kidnapping (which actually doesn't exist but why worry about facts when you get be anxious, right?).
You must read this book: Free-Range Kids, by Lenore Skenazy, apparently, "America's Worst Mom," only I missed all the media attention she got when given that title. This book, in addition to actually having real information about motherly fears (in order to allay them) will make you feel better about everything else in your life to.
She is not paying me to say this either. In fact, I don't know. But I do know that I run towards the anxious, and that motherhood can feel like a landmine of disasters--you never know where they will come from! Watch out, don't go outside or inside or in the bathroom and put down that plastic bag!
This book is like: fear not! We can ALL enjoy childhood once again.
Thanks, Lenore. I love you, you rockin' pioneer woman for the modern age!
We also went through the swine (I was trying to get pregnant then and pregnant women were at high risk).
One time, my third child actually choked on an apple and my friend, a PA had to smack his back to save his life.
Also, yesterday, my daughter fell in the toilet because my son forgot to put down the seat. Oh, woops! That's not scary after all, because you only die if you fall in HEAD first.
Why is this woman smiling? Because she's not afraid of everything! (She's Lenore Skenazy, that's why.)People LOVE to scare mothers, because we are so very, very good at neurotic paranoia. I do have friends who are afraid to let their children play outside due to the high rate of suburban kidnapping (which actually doesn't exist but why worry about facts when you get be anxious, right?).
You must read this book: Free-Range Kids, by Lenore Skenazy, apparently, "America's Worst Mom," only I missed all the media attention she got when given that title. This book, in addition to actually having real information about motherly fears (in order to allay them) will make you feel better about everything else in your life to.
She is not paying me to say this either. In fact, I don't know. But I do know that I run towards the anxious, and that motherhood can feel like a landmine of disasters--you never know where they will come from! Watch out, don't go outside or inside or in the bathroom and put down that plastic bag!
This book is like: fear not! We can ALL enjoy childhood once again.
Thanks, Lenore. I love you, you rockin' pioneer woman for the modern age!
September 29, 2012
What We Ate
for dinner this week.
MONDAY
Southwestern Scramble (scrambled eggs, black beans, mixed cheeses)
Healthy Homefries (native potatoes fried in a tablespoon of oil with garam masala)
Native Green Beans
TUESDAY
(The day I leave early to teach yoga and make dinner before I go so it is historically very simple.)
Trader Joe's tortellini with TJ sauce
Big ol' pile of native broccoli
Kids get yogurt and honey for dessert
WEDNESDAY
Homemade pizza (whole wheat crust topped with Mama's homemade pesto with grown from the garden basil, pizza sauce and mozzarella)
Big ol' pile of cauliflower
THURSDAY
Brown Rice
Honeyed Tofu Cutlets (from Saving Dinner the Vegetarian Way)
Our own home grown runner beans
Spinach, arugula salad with sliced almonds and cranberries
Native roasted acorn squash
FRIDAY
Potato and leek soup with native veggies and made from scratch (including milk from Mapeline Farm--glass bottles!) recipe from the Kripalu Cookbook
Native roasted beets with lemon juice and feta
Kids cucumber and green pepper slices from our own homegrown veggies
Homemade pumpkin biscuits from a native pumpkin (that I cooked and mushed)
THIS IS A TRUE DOCUMENT. And I had to record it because it makes me look like the vegetarian Donna Reed, like Martha Stuart gone hippie, like the world's perfect mother!!! Wow! I'm awesome and I don't even like to cook. (You ought to see my kitchen when I'm done....)
MONDAY
Southwestern Scramble (scrambled eggs, black beans, mixed cheeses)
Healthy Homefries (native potatoes fried in a tablespoon of oil with garam masala)
Native Green Beans
TUESDAY
(The day I leave early to teach yoga and make dinner before I go so it is historically very simple.)
Trader Joe's tortellini with TJ sauce
Big ol' pile of native broccoli
Kids get yogurt and honey for dessert
WEDNESDAY
Homemade pizza (whole wheat crust topped with Mama's homemade pesto with grown from the garden basil, pizza sauce and mozzarella)
Big ol' pile of cauliflower
THURSDAY
Brown Rice
Honeyed Tofu Cutlets (from Saving Dinner the Vegetarian Way)
Our own home grown runner beans
Spinach, arugula salad with sliced almonds and cranberries
Native roasted acorn squash
FRIDAYPotato and leek soup with native veggies and made from scratch (including milk from Mapeline Farm--glass bottles!) recipe from the Kripalu Cookbook
Native roasted beets with lemon juice and feta
Kids cucumber and green pepper slices from our own homegrown veggies
Homemade pumpkin biscuits from a native pumpkin (that I cooked and mushed)
THIS IS A TRUE DOCUMENT. And I had to record it because it makes me look like the vegetarian Donna Reed, like Martha Stuart gone hippie, like the world's perfect mother!!! Wow! I'm awesome and I don't even like to cook. (You ought to see my kitchen when I'm done....)
September 25, 2012
Go Feminist Amish
There's a little known sect of the Amish called the Radical Feminist Amish.
They have one member.
Me.
And this is a call for new members. Anyone out there want to join?
When my family visited the Old Order Amish in Pennsylvania a few years ago, I picked up the best book on the Amish I've read to date: The Riddle of Amish Culture. The book is a fascinating exploration of the choices modern Amish people make in order to maintain the form of their life.
I loved the book so much, and it resonated so strongly with me, that I HAD TO STOP READING IT because I got so depressed that I cannot be Amish!
I suppose you think this makes me slightly crazy...and maybe it does, but let's consider that the Amish are not merely "old-fashioned" people. They are people make conscious decisions about HOW they want to live in this mixed-up, fast-paced, digital universe.
I'm reading a parenting book now, The Hurried Child, that touches on some of the same issues: our lust for speed, the pressure-cooker of achievement, success at what cost to our innocence?
So, maybe I am crazy because I think little girls shouldn't wear lipstick and childhood should be saved from the violence of the media (the only reason you don't think it's violent is because you ARE IMMUNE after watching one zillion images of people hitting/killing/destroying one another). If you can sit in front of the nightly news and eat pie, then you are officially desensitized.
All of us are making choices about how we live. The cool thing about the Amish is the incredible thought, prayer, and meditation that goes into the preservation of their traditions. It's not easy to be different in a world where sameness is a sign of success--but, hey, you gotta be who you are! Even if you're a feminist Amish on the inside!
Notice how I am wearing an apron while outside on an Easter egg hunt! Such Amish fashion! (okay, minus the pink color and the length and the shoes....)
They have one member.Me.
And this is a call for new members. Anyone out there want to join?
When my family visited the Old Order Amish in Pennsylvania a few years ago, I picked up the best book on the Amish I've read to date: The Riddle of Amish Culture. The book is a fascinating exploration of the choices modern Amish people make in order to maintain the form of their life.
I loved the book so much, and it resonated so strongly with me, that I HAD TO STOP READING IT because I got so depressed that I cannot be Amish!
I suppose you think this makes me slightly crazy...and maybe it does, but let's consider that the Amish are not merely "old-fashioned" people. They are people make conscious decisions about HOW they want to live in this mixed-up, fast-paced, digital universe.
I'm reading a parenting book now, The Hurried Child, that touches on some of the same issues: our lust for speed, the pressure-cooker of achievement, success at what cost to our innocence?
So, maybe I am crazy because I think little girls shouldn't wear lipstick and childhood should be saved from the violence of the media (the only reason you don't think it's violent is because you ARE IMMUNE after watching one zillion images of people hitting/killing/destroying one another). If you can sit in front of the nightly news and eat pie, then you are officially desensitized.
All of us are making choices about how we live. The cool thing about the Amish is the incredible thought, prayer, and meditation that goes into the preservation of their traditions. It's not easy to be different in a world where sameness is a sign of success--but, hey, you gotta be who you are! Even if you're a feminist Amish on the inside!
Notice how I am wearing an apron while outside on an Easter egg hunt! Such Amish fashion! (okay, minus the pink color and the length and the shoes....)
September 18, 2012
Call Me Feminist Duggar
There are some things I just do differently.
Like how I think.
Today, in my free time (the ten minutes of it), I will have a chance to read the non-fiction book I'm absolutely adoring, HOW TO BE A WOMAN, and later, when the children are asleep, watch my favorite television program, the ONLY one I watch on TV, 19 Kids and Counting.
So let's compare and contrast.
Caitlin Moran, the author of HOW TO BE A WOMAN, writes about feminism, pubic hair, Brazilians, her first experiences with masturbation in such a hilarious, profound call to arms that one is left longing to, simply, be her.
Michelle Duggar, with her brood of 19, will not wear a skirt that falls above her knees. None of her daughters wear pants. No one in the entire family dances. They don't want to arouse any desires inappropriately.
Who is the person who can love and admire both these women?
Well, me.
And they do have some things in common.
Here's Caitlin. This is the picture from her book cover. (c. Christ Floyd)
See how she has long hair. And you can't see it in this photo, but she's wearing a dress!
Here's Michelle. Look! She has long hair. And she's wearing a skirt.
And they ARE both mothers. It's like they're practically the same person.
These are the two biggest feminists in my life right now. Michelle doesn't call herself one, but that's okay with me! A powerful woman is a powerful woman no matter what you call her, or what anyone ELSE calls her and tomorrow I'll post a picture of MYSELF so you can see how much we ALL look alike.....
Like how I think.
Today, in my free time (the ten minutes of it), I will have a chance to read the non-fiction book I'm absolutely adoring, HOW TO BE A WOMAN, and later, when the children are asleep, watch my favorite television program, the ONLY one I watch on TV, 19 Kids and Counting.
So let's compare and contrast.
Caitlin Moran, the author of HOW TO BE A WOMAN, writes about feminism, pubic hair, Brazilians, her first experiences with masturbation in such a hilarious, profound call to arms that one is left longing to, simply, be her.
Michelle Duggar, with her brood of 19, will not wear a skirt that falls above her knees. None of her daughters wear pants. No one in the entire family dances. They don't want to arouse any desires inappropriately.
Who is the person who can love and admire both these women?
Well, me.
And they do have some things in common.
Here's Caitlin. This is the picture from her book cover. (c. Christ Floyd)See how she has long hair. And you can't see it in this photo, but she's wearing a dress!
Here's Michelle. Look! She has long hair. And she's wearing a skirt.And they ARE both mothers. It's like they're practically the same person.
These are the two biggest feminists in my life right now. Michelle doesn't call herself one, but that's okay with me! A powerful woman is a powerful woman no matter what you call her, or what anyone ELSE calls her and tomorrow I'll post a picture of MYSELF so you can see how much we ALL look alike.....
June 13, 2012
Do you speak Polish?
I'm thrilled. THIS LITTLE MOMMY STAYED HOME has been bought by a Polish publisher! This makes the third country (not counting America and Canada) of publication.
If you read Polish, you'll have to tell me how it is....
Also, if you have not read the book yet, you really have no more excuses. It's been THREE years since the release. Copies in the warehouse are gathering dust; you can get the thing on ebay for, like, 19 cents. If you wait long enough, you can get a Polish dictionary and a Polish translation of the book and read the two together--but why do things the hard way? Get it from your local bookseller and then, when you email me and say, "I've read your book!" you will not be lying!! (I don't know that this has happened to me yet, but I wouldn't be surprised. Also, I haven't done any promotion in a long time, so I thought this post could count as my marketing plan for the month. For the two people who read my blog.)
If you read Polish, you'll have to tell me how it is....
Also, if you have not read the book yet, you really have no more excuses. It's been THREE years since the release. Copies in the warehouse are gathering dust; you can get the thing on ebay for, like, 19 cents. If you wait long enough, you can get a Polish dictionary and a Polish translation of the book and read the two together--but why do things the hard way? Get it from your local bookseller and then, when you email me and say, "I've read your book!" you will not be lying!! (I don't know that this has happened to me yet, but I wouldn't be surprised. Also, I haven't done any promotion in a long time, so I thought this post could count as my marketing plan for the month. For the two people who read my blog.)
