Matthew Dicks's Blog, page 193

Don't tie a bow at the end of your story

I’m a fan of ending books and stories a little bit sooner than my readers and listeners would like. I like to leave some dangling threads. A few unanswered questions. Something still left to wonder about.

I think by doing so, my story lingers in the hearts and minds of my reader and listeners a little bit longer. Rather than being one of those books or stories that can quickly be forgotten, I like to think that my stories continue to tickle the brains of my readers and listeners long after my storytelling has ended.

I’ve received many messages over the years from many, many readers and listeners, dying to know what happened next, both in the lives of my fictional characters as well as my own life. Last year, I started receiving emails from teenage girls in Mexico who had somehow started reading my first novel, Something Missing, and wanted to know if Martin and Laura, the protagonists, ended up together.

Imagine that:

Teenage girls in a foreign country took the time to find the email address of an American author so they could write an email in Spanish (an arcane form of communication for most teenagers) and then use Google to translate it to English so they could ask me if two fictional characters - people who don’t actually exist - end up together.

THAT is a story that’s still tickling their brains long after they’ve finished reading the book.

I received this message recently via Instagram which offers similar proof to the power of the incomplete story.

I love it so much. I love how much this reader loves this book and yet is tortured by it at the same time.

My advice is simple:

Stories shouldn’t end in neatly tied bows. Questions should be left unanswered. Your audience - readers or listeners - should be left wondering. Guessing. Wanting more.

This is how stories become some memorable that years later, they are still wondering what happened next.

Trump's Fourth of July history lesson

In case you missed Trump’s speech at the Lincoln Memorial yesterday (and congratulations if you did), here are a couple highlights:

Trump said:

"The Continental Army suffered a bitter winner at Valley Forge, found glory across the waters of the Delaware and seized victory from Cornwallis of Yorktown. Our Army manned the air, it ran the ramparts, it took over the airports, it did everything it had to do."

That’s right. Trump said airports.

He also said the Army “manned the air,” which makes no sense given it would be another 127 years before the airplane was even invented. How exactly does one “man the air” without the ability to fly?

You also don’t “run ramparts.” You can climb them. Ascend them. Assault them. Seize them. Throw sticks at them. Paint them. Kick them. Even kiss them. But a rampart is a wall. You can’t run them.

But all that’s beside the point. Trump said airports.

He also said that the Fort McHenry battle that inspired the writing of the Star Spangled Banner occurred during the Revolutionary War.

It was the War of 1812. Fort McHenry didn’t even exist during the Revolutionary War.

The strangest thing about all of this ignorance and stupidity is that Trump was reading from a teleprompter, which means that either his speechwriters are incredibly stupid (or trying to undermine him) or he can’t read very well.

In addition to all of this, the public cameras on the National Mall were coincidentally turned off yesterday, likely to avoid showing Trump’s characteristically low turnout, and America got its first look at Trump’s hair when it’s wet.

For a man who is obsessed with image (his and others) and routinely insults the physical appearance of his critics and opponents, this image, which has been tweeted tens of thousands of times, must have really stung.

Especially when his predecessor also spoke on the Fourth of July in the rain and made it look so damn good.

Important notes on this Fourth of July 2019

I’ll never understand the fascination of some people to light their own fireworks, which are always subpar in comparison to the real thing and occasionally result in serious injuries, permanent maiming, and house fires.

When I was growing up in Massachusetts, the purchase or ownership of fireworks was illegal. This, in my mind, made a hell of a lot of sense, even as a child.

Only 58% of Americans understand what actually happened on July 4, 1776 (which is almost nothing, since the vote for independence was actually taken on July 2, 1776), but still… c’mon people. You should know what we’re celebrating today.

Presidents Thomas Jefferson, John Adams, and James Monroe - Founding Fathers who all played important roles in the Revolutionary War - died on July 4. I don’t support death, but if you’re going to die, I appreciate a well-timed demise.

Meteorologists are predicting extreme heat and intense thunderstorms in Washington, DC today. Given that Trump has illegally diverted money from the US Park service to pay for his vanity project and politicized the event by giving VIP tickets to wealthy Republican donors, I’m happy to see that Mother Nature has decided to spoil his party at least a little bit.

Military leaders, reportedly extremely uncomfortable with the politicization of the armed forces by Trump, have refused to allow tanks to drive down the streets of Washington. Instead, two tanks will be placed on flatbed trucks and remain stationary throughout the day, so what Trump once envisioned as a military parade is now a slightly more intense version of your everyday Touch-a-Truck event. Another reason to celebrate.

My favorite Fourth of July celebrations took place on my grandparents’ farm. I grew up next door to my grandparents, and nothing was better than smelling the burgers and the hot dogs from by backyard and running up the hill to celebrate.

Please take a moment today amidst the parades, fireworks, and hot dogs to reflect upon the sacrifices made by our Founding Fathers, who built this country through sweat, blood, and desire. As for me, I’ll be thinking about Samuel Whittemore, who might just be the toughest old guy in the history of the world.

Born in England in 1694, Whittemore went to North America in 1745 as a captain in the British army, where he fought in King George's War (1744-48) at the age of 50 and the French and Indian War (1754-63) at the age of 64.

Then on April 19, 1775, at the age of 80, he engaged British forces returning from the Battles of Lexington and Concord at the onset of the Revolutionary War.

Whittemore was in his fields when he spotted an approaching British relief brigade under Earl Percy, sent to assist the retreat. Whittemore loaded his musket and ambushed the British from behind a nearby stone wall, killing one soldier. He then drew his dueling pistols and killed a grenadier and mortally wounded a second. By the time Whittemore had fired his third shot, a British detachment reached his position; Whittemore drew his sword and attacked. He was shot in the face, bayoneted thirteen times, and left for dead in a pool of blood. He was found alive, trying to load his musket to fight again. He was taken to Dr. Cotton Tufts of Medford, who perceived no hope for his survival. However, Whittemore lived another 18 years until dying of natural causes at the age of 98.

In 2005, Whittemore was proclaimed the official state hero of Massachusetts. Not bad considering this is a state that produced such wartime heroes as Paul Revere, Israel Putnam, John Hancock, Robert Shaw and John Kennedy.

All great men, but if I were sent to war, I’d choose Samuel Whittemore to stand on my side above them all.

Happy Fourth of July everyone.

This is the way to write a review

Thinking about writing a review of a book you enjoyed?

Probably not, I know, but you should! Positive reviews help readers find books and make authors quite happy.

The Other Mother, my sixth novel, won’t publish in the United States until sometime in 2020, but it’s available in the UK and abroad now. An unusual situation created by my US publisher’s decision to reverse the order of my books.

I saw this review of the book on Instagram the other day and thought, “Damn… this is how to write a review.”

Shooketh! An invented word! A beautiful word! An act of creation!

Also a word that appears in the urban dictionary, credited to a YouTube comedian in 2017, but still…

Invent a word. Break new ground. Write a review. Bring a little joy to an author’s life.

Meteorological adjectives are hard

Are you as confused over the adjectives for Thursday and Friday as I am?

Your negativity sucks. Shut up.

Elysha and I are taking the kids to Disney World for a week. It will be their first time frolicking at the Magic Kingdom.

I can’t wait.

Elysha visited Disney World as a child, but I did not. My first visit came when I was about 19 years old. My best friend, Bengi, and I drove from Massachusetts to Orlando to visit the Magic Kingdom.

I spent most of my time chasing after a girl.

Elysha and I were fortunate enough to have our friend and Disney expert plan the trip. Our meals are planned. Reservations made. Fast passes are secured. Wrist bands and luggage tags have arrived. An Amazon Prime shipment of snacks and other necessities is scheduled to arrive in our room just as we land in Florida.

Everything is ready to go.

As we’ve mentioned our upcoming Disney trip to various friends and acquaintances, their reactions have fallen into two distinct camps:

Excitement about our upcoming adventure

Warnings about the potential pitfalls of a trip to Disney World

As you might imagine, I adore the people in the first category and am astounded and appalled by those in the latter category.

It’s shocking how negative people can be when you tell them that you’re planning a vacation to Disney. They groan. They complain about the heat and humidity. They warn you about the long lines and large crowds. They whine about the drudgery of dragging kids through the parks. One person actually warned me about how annoyingly happy everyone will be.

Sadly, these awful, negative jackasses outnumber the folks who are excited for us by at least 2:1.

What is wrong with these people? How awful and dreary must your life be to denigrate Disney World to an excited parent? How stupid and sad must you be to listen to a smiling, happy father talk about how excited he is to bring his kids to the Magic Kingdom and then spend the next ten minutes warning him about the heat?

These are probably the same rotten souls who tell glowing, pregnant women how challenging and impossible parenting will be. Probably the same sad sacks who spend most of the Christmas season complaining about the crowds and shopping.

If you are one of these people who thinks that warning parents about the pitfalls of Disney World is a good idea, STOP.

You’re not helping.

Also, no one wants to hear it. People probably don’t like you.

I certainly don’t.

I was explaining this post to my ten year-old daughter, Clara, when she said, “Sometimes I feel negative about things. I can’t help it. But I’d never try to make someone else feel the same way I was feeling, especially if they looked excited or happy. That would just be mean.”

Exactly.

So if you’re about to tell a parent why their trip to Disney won’t be as magical as they’re hoping, shut your stupid mouth. Take a lesson from my daughter. She gets it.

So should you.

Resolution update: June 2019

Each month I review the progress of my yearly goals and report on that progress as a means of holding myself accountable.

Here are the results for June.

Since we have reached the halfway point in the year, I also like to take a step back and assess the likelihood of me completing each goal.
__________________________________

PERSONAL HEALTH

1. Don’t die.

Still standing.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Highly confident

2. Lose 20 pounds.

I didn’t lose any pounds in June. I didn’t gain any pounds in June.

I’ve lost 8 pounds in total.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Moderately confident

3. Eat at least three servings of fruits and/or vegetables per day, six days a week.

Done! Along with bananas, grapes, apples, and pears, I also ate carrots, onions, potatoes, an assortment of vegetables in various soups, and an arugula and fig pizza.

Yeah. That’s right. Arugula.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Highly confident

4. Do at least 100 push-ups, 100 sit-ups, and 3 one-minute planks for five days a week.

Done.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Highly confident

5. Do burpees three days a week.

I did 3-4 burpees per day, 3 times each week in June. My shoulder hurts. I blame the stupid burpees.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Highly confident. Regrettably so.

WRITING CAREER

6. Complete my seventh novel before the end of 2019.

Still waiting for a go-ahead from my editor regarding my next book. This is the problem with being two books ahead. No one is in a rush for your 2022/2023 novel.

I meet with her on Tuesday in New York.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Moderately confident

7. Write/complete at least five new picture books, including one with a female, non-white protagonist. 

I’m currently working on three different children’s books. I like one very much.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Moderately confident

8. Write a memoir.

Work continues. I’ve switched from the present tense to the past tense. This helped a lot.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Moderately confident

9. Write a new screenplay.

No progress.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Not confident

10. Write a musical.

No progress.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Not confident

11. Submit at least five Op-Ed pieces to The New York Times for consideration.

I submitted a piece to the NY Times Modern Love column in April.

One down. Four to go.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Highly confident

12. Submit one or more short stories to at least three publishing outlets.

No progress.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Highly confident

13. Select three behaviors that I am opposed to and adopt them for one week, then write about my experiences on the blog.

I read that smiling when you wake up can be very beneficial. Supposed health benefits include:

When you smile your body releases the feel-good neurotransmitters dopamine and endorphins. This means that by smiling first thing when you wake up you’ll be starting your day in a better mood.

In addition, when you smile your mood is further lifted by the release of serotonin.

Smiling strengthens the immune system, so by smiling first thing in the morning and remembering to do it throughout the day you’ll be warding off disease, specially during flu season.

This is all supposed to happen even if your smile is forced. I’ve written before about how you can trick your brain through biofeedback (including smiling), but I really can’t see how a fake smile early in the morning will change anything about my day.

I’m about to find out.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Moderately confident

14. Increase my storytelling newsletter subscriber base to 3,000.

52 new subscribers in June for a total of 701 new subscribers in 2019. My list now stands at 2,811 subscribers.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Moderately confident

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15. Write at least six letters to my father.

One letter written in June for Father’s Day. One written so far this year.

16. Write 100 letters in 2019.

Five letters written in June. 14 overall. I have a lot of writing to do this summer.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Moderately confident

17. Convert Greetings Little One into a book.

A kind, generous, and amazing human being has begun work on this project.

I am thrilled.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Moderately confident

STORYTELLING

18. Produce a total of 10 Speak Up storytelling events.

One show produced in June at Infinity Hall in Hartford.

A total of 8 shows produced so far in 2019.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Highly confident

19. Begin selling Speak Up merchandise at our events and/or online.

Done! We began selling tee shirts and totes at our live podcast recording.

Next step is to make it available online.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Complete

20. Pitch myself to at least 5 upcoming TEDx events with the hopes of being accepted by one.

Done! I’ve pitched myself to five TEDx conferences and was nominated for a sixth.

All have now passed on my pitches. No one wants me.

I’ll just keep pitching.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Complete

21. Attend at least 15 Moth events with the intention of telling a story.

I attended two Moth StorySLAMs and a Moth GrandSLAM in June, bringing my total to 12 events so far.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Highly confident

22. Win at least three Moth StorySLAMs.

Done! I won my third StorySLAM on 2019 and my 40th StorySLAM overall at Oberon in Cambridge

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Complete

23. Win a Moth GrandSLAM.

I finished in second place by a tenth of a point in a Moth GrandSLAM in January.

I finished in fourth place in my Moth GrandSLAM in March, but I think I might’ve told my best story ever.

I competed but did not win the NYC Moth GrandSLAM in June. Silent scoring (I’m not a fan) prevents me from knowing how I placed (though I may be able to ask).

I may be competing in one more Moth GrandSLAM in NYC this year depending on the timing of the GrandSLAM and the number of storytellers in the queue ahead of me.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Not confident

24. Produce at least 40 episodes of our new podcast Speak Up Storytelling. 

Four new shows released in June. A total of 24 so far. We haven’t missed a week in 2019.

Listen to our latest here or subscribe wherever you get your podcasts.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Highly confident

25. Perform stand up at least four times in 2019. 

I’ve scheduled my first open mic for July.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Moderately confident

26. Develop and teach a Storytelling Master Class, in which participants have an opportunity to tell at least two stories over the course of the day  or tell a story and then retell it based on feedback.

Done on June 1! It went surprisingly well.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Complete

27. Pitch at least three stories to This American Life.

No progress.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Moderately confident

28. Pitch myself to Marc Maron’s WTF podcast at least three times.

I wrote to Marc early in January, asking for him to consider me as a guest.

No response yet.

I’ve also officially requested that my publicist assist me in this endeavor.

If you know Marc Maron, or know someone who knows Marc or know someone who knows Marc’s producer or booker, please let me know. I know that Marc and I would have an amazing conversation, and it’s currently my biggest dream to get on his show.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Highly confident

NEW PROJECTS

29. Host a fundraiser for RIP Medical Debt, which would allow us to relieve the medical debt of struggling Americans for pennies on the dollar.

No progress.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Not confident

30. Complete my Eagle Scout project.

No progress.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Not confident

31. Print, hang, and/or display at least 25 prints, photos, or portraits in our home.

We received our estimate from the painters. Depending on other expenses, we will likely be painting several rooms this summer or fall, at which point things can be hung on the walls.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Moderately confident

32. Renovate our first floor bathroom.

Work will commence next month.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Highly confident

33. Organize our second floor bathroom.

No progress. Summertime project that should commence soon.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Highly confident

MISCELLANEOUS

34. Cook at least 12 good meals (averaging one per month) in 2019.

I made no meals in June.

Four down. Eight to go.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Moderately confident

35. Plan a reunion of the Heavy Metal Playhouse.

No progress

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Not confident

36. Ride my bike with my kids at least 25 times in 2019.

I rode my bike with Charlie one time in June for a total of six rides so far.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Highly confident

37. I will not comment, positively or negatively, about physical appearance of any person save my wife and children, in 2019 in an effort to reduce the focus on physical appearance in our culture overall. 

Done! I did not comment on physical appearance with the exception of my wife and children in June.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Highly confident

38. Surprise Elysha at least six times in 2019.

Two surprises were set into motion in May, but neither has come to fruition yet. One of my friends just ruined a surprise that I had planned for today.

Four surprises accomplished so far.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Highly confident

39. Replace the 12 ancient, energy-inefficient windows in our home with new windows that will keep the cold out and actually open in the warmer months.

No progress.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Not confident

40. Clean the basement. 

Incremental progress. Every week I throw away or organize a few items.

I’m ordering a dumpster this summer, and I have hired someone to assist me.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Highly confident

41. Set a new personal best in golf.

I started taking lessons this summer, and I’ve committed myself to constant practice. The results are beginning to show, not so much in my scores this weekend but in my swing and understanding of how I should be swinging. It’s all very new, so it’ll be bad before it’s good, but for the first time, I have a path to playing better.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Moderately confident

42. Play poker at least six times in 2019.

A game was scheduled and canceled in June. That’s three cancelled games so far.

A new game needs to be scheduled for July.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Moderately confident

43. Spend at least six days with my best friend of more than 25 years.

Bengi and I spent a Sunday afternoon playing board games at a local hobby shop in June.

Two down. Four to go.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Moderately confident

44. Post my progress in terms of these resolutions on this blog on the first day of every month.

Done.

LIKELIHOOD OF COMPLETION: Highly confident

Good week in the press

The Hartford Courant’s Christopher Arnott was kind enough to include me in his piece, The Nine Muses Of Summer In Connecticut: A Divine Arts Preview.

He writes:

“The muse of storytelling in Connecticut is Matthew Dicks, a Moth StorySLAM champion and bestselling author who’s taught many of the top storytellers in the state. Dicks is leading a weeklong “Storytelling Boot Camp” July 29 through Aug. 2 at the Connecticut Historical Society Museum and Library, 1 Elizabeth St., Hartford.”

That’s some serious kindness.

That bootcamp is already sold out. Remarkably, the roster includes two folks from China, one from British Columbia, one from San Diego, and one from Illinois.

Kind of crazy. Huh?

And a lot of pressure. I’ve recently had folks from Montreal, Maryland, and Kansas City attend my workshops, and though the day always goes well and my instruction is well received, I feel a lot of added pressure to perform considering the distances traveled.

China? British Columbia?

The next day, a piece on Latestly.com featured one of my tweets directed at Donald Trump in response to one of his tweets in which he oddly (though now routinely) complimented himself in the third person.

No wonder why he has not actual friends. Can you imagine spending time with someone who talks like this?

The writers of the piece quoted my tweet in their piece.

"Don’t you see how pathetic and needy this sounds? People all over the world are laughing at you, Donald. Laughing at your sad, desperate need for attention and praise," commented noted author Matthew Dicks.

See that?

“Noted author.”

I’m not sure how true that really is, but it was fun to see! And it’ll be something I can look back upon with fondness when someone isn’t so kind to me in print, because that happens, too.

"On line" is not pride-worthy

There are few things in this world more annoying than a New Yorker (or former New Yorker) who talks about the way they say “waiting on line” instead of “in line” like it’s some kind of badge of honor.

Join me for storytelling at Kripalu Center for Yoga and Health!

Looking to learn more about storytelling?

Take a double deep dive into storytelling in 2019:

If you want to learn about storytelling and have an opportunity to practice, I'll be teaching weekend-long beginners and advanced storytelling workshops at Kripalu Center for Yoga and Heath this fall in Stockbridge, MA.

Two full weekends of storytelling, yoga, world-class food, relaxation, and a chance to learn, practice, perform, and meet new people. Maybe make a new friend for life!

October 25-27: Storytelling workshop (beginners), Kripalu Center for Yoga and Health: http://bit.ly/2wPBWGQ

December 6-8: Storytelling workshop (advanced), Kripalu Center for Yoga and Health: http://bit.ly/2Rf5dV3