Scott Murray's Blog, page 146

October 31, 2017

Manchester United 2-0 Benfica: Champions League – as it happened

United are on the verge of qualification for the knockout stage after a solid win over Benfica.

10.12pm GMT

9.38pm GMT

And that’s that! United did enough to see off a much-improved Benfica in a highly entertaining game. They’ve not quite made it to the knockout stage yet, CSKA Moscow having won in Basel, but they’re as good as there, having claimed 12 points out of 12 so far and requiring just one more to get through. A good night’s work for Jose Mourinho, who throws a friendly arm around his opposite number Rui Vitoria and wanders off to warm applause. Seems the home support enjoyed that, just as he’d hoped. Benfica, for the record, are out.

9.34pm GMT

90 min: Blind and Douglas slam into each other in the 1970s style. No holds barred, no quarter given. Ooyah, oof. That will have hurt. But there are no histrionics, and both men are quickly up and about again.

9.33pm GMT

89 min: Jonas channels his inner Jim Baxter, playing keepy-uppy to the left of the United goal. He eventually gets fed up and flicks a cross towards Salvio, on the right-hand corner of the six-yard box. Salvio rises to bang a header on goal, but de Gea claims without too much fuss. Lovely skill from Jonas, though. It’s been a very entertaining match, from start to finish.

9.31pm GMT

87 min: Salvio skitters with purpose down the right, reaches the byline, and slams a low cross through the six-yard box. Seferovic didn’t anticipate in the middle. Bailly hacks out for a corner, and nothing comes of the set piece.

9.30pm GMT

86 min: Mkhitaryan splits Benfica in two with a glorious pass down the inside-left channel. Rashford is in space at the left-hand corner of the box. He squares a pass for Lukaku, who winds up to shoot first time. The effort is blocked. Nothing quite going Lukaku’s way right now.

9.27pm GMT

84 min: Rashford goes for goal, 30 yards up the left wing. Ambitious. But to be fair, he’s earned the right.

9.26pm GMT

82 min: That CSKA Moscow goal means United still need a point to qualify. Meanwhile a corner for Benfica which very nearly ends up with Rashford skating off towards goal from the halfway line. But not quite.

9.24pm GMT

80 min: Jonas comes on for Pizzi. And here’s a scoreline: CSKA have turned it around in Basel, and they’re now leading 2-1!

9.23pm GMT

Lukaku prepares to tee up the ball and take the kick. Herrera takes the ball off him and shapes to take responsibility himself. Finally Blind snatches it off Herrera, and lashes a simple one down the middle. Slightly farcical scenes, but United will care not a jot: they’ll be in the knockout stages tonight unless Moscow find a winner in Basel.

9.21pm GMT

77 min: Rashford makes an instant impact. He zips past Samaris, enters the area, beats Ruben Dias on the outside, and is then clattered by Samaris, coming back for more. Happy 20th birthday to this amazing young man!

9.19pm GMT

75 min: Both teams make a change. Seferovic replaces Jimenez for Benfica; the excellent Martial makes way for the birthday boy Rashford.

9.17pm GMT

73 min: McTominay makes his way into the box from the right, but can’t quite get a shot away. He’s been impressive this evening. Benfica go up the other end, Salvio getting better down the inside-right channel and earning a corner off Blind (even if it looked as though he had the last touch). Fortunately for fans of all that’s right and proper, the dodgy corner comes to nothing.

9.16pm GMT

71 min: Lukaku wanders in off the right flank and exchanges passes with Mkhitaryan on the edge of the box. He’s free in the box, but his chipped shot is turned round the post by Svilar, who was quickly up in the striker’s grille. And Lukaku is miles offside anyway. Sad thing is, looking at the replay, Mkhitaryan’s pinged pass was for Martial, who was coming through the middle and was very much onside. But Lukaku took the shot on. Martial throws his hands in the air, a picture of frustration.

9.13pm GMT

69 min: Mkhitaryan strides down the middle of the pitch in the proactive style. It’s a barnstorming run. He’s tugged back by Salvio in the most cynical fashion. That Adidas fabric doesn’t half stretch. Salvio is booked, and doesn’t bother complaining.

9.11pm GMT

67 min: United have lost control of the midfield, and Mourinho has seen enough. Mata is replaced by Herrera. Meanwhile CSKA have equalised in Basel: it’s 1-1. As things stand, United are still going through tonight.

9.10pm GMT

66 min: Benfica started this half slowly, but they’re fully in the game again now. They’re dominating possession. And they’ve unnerved United. Bailly plays a preposterous square ball towards Smalling, 30 yards from goal. Jimenez nips in to steal it, and curls a shot past de Gea and onto the outside of the left-hand post! Goal kick. The margins have been fine tonight.

9.07pm GMT

64 min: Benfica make a change. Eliseu comes on for Grimaldo.

9.06pm GMT

62 min: Jimenez races down the inside-right channel and threatens to break clear of Bailly. The defender does very well to hold him up, and pushes him out towards the right wing. Jimenez, who had been hopeful of getting a shot away, settles for a deep cross towards Pizzi. It’s no good. United were light at the back there; a chance spurned by the visitors.

9.04pm GMT

60 min: Plenty of Benfica possession. A good couple of minutes’ worth in the United half. Pass, pass, passity, pass. And suddenly Goncalves spins away from Smalling down the inside-right channel and threads a shot towards the bottom left. It’s on target, and it looks like it’s going in, but de Gea somehow fingertips it round the post at full stretch. What a shot, and a save to match! The corner comes to nought.

9.01pm GMT

57 min: Jimenez drops a shoulder, 20 yards from goal, shifting gently from left to right and curling one towards the bottom right. The unflappable de Gea is behind it all the way.

9.00pm GMT

55 min: So having given Martial the big sell, he gets into a couple of decent positions down the left and messes both of them up in spectacular style. First he breaks clear from a Benfica thicket only to wildly slash an effort into the Stretford End. Then he’s sent scampering into the box by Lukaku, but instead of taking a shot from a similar position to his game-winning one against Spurs the other day, tries to beat Ruben Dias with a trick on the outside. The ball clanks off his shin and out of play.

8.57pm GMT

53 min: Benfica were bright and impressive in the first period; they’re not on it in the second so far. Goncalves tries to get something moving with a power dribble down the left, cutting inside and shaping to shoot, but he hesitates and the chance to get something sailing goalwards is gone.

8.54pm GMT

51 min: Martial opens Benfica up down the right with a delicious little backheel. Darmian goes romping towards the byline, then cuts back for Mata, who lashes wildly over. Martial has been the best player on the pitch by a country mile.

8.52pm GMT

49 min: All a little bit scrappy since the restart. The travelling Benfica fans sound like they’re enjoying themselves, despite the scoreline.

8.51pm GMT

47 min: Martial makes another determined run down the left, and slips the ball inside for Lukaku, who has options around him, or a chance to advance on the box and shoot. He takes a heavy touch and loses possession. A slight groan from the Old Trafford faithful. Nothing major, but you can bet Jose’s ears pricked up.

8.49pm GMT

You want second-half action? We got second-half action! Benfica get the ball rolling again. United have replaced Lingard, who injured his ribs early in that first half, with Mkhitaryan.

8.45pm GMT

Half-time admin:

8.35pm GMT

The whistle goes for the end of the first half. The unfortunate Svilar allows himself a wry smile as he walks off to the dressing room, then looks up at the heavens in a semi-accusatory manner. You can hardly blame him. But United won’t care, and nor should they: they have a precious lead! And with Basel leading CSKA 1-0 at half time, they’re closing in on a place in the knockout stage!

8.33pm GMT

45 min +1: A deflated Benfica allow Lukaku to burst through the middle, clear on goal! He looks to gently lift the ball over Svilar, who gets in the way magnificently, the ball sailing out for a corner. A wonderful save to add to his bittersweet collection.

8.32pm GMT

Another nightmare for the young keeper, though he can’t be blamed for this. Matic, 25 yards out, extends a long leg and lashes a pearler towards the bottom right. Svilar has it covered if it’s on target. But it’s not. The ball hits the base of the right-hand post, out onto the fully-extended Svilar’s back, and into the net. Svilar has been excellent this half; he’ll be wondering what he’s done to deserve this! Great shot from Matic, mind.

8.29pm GMT

44 min: Martial bursts down the left and earns a corner off a panting Salvio. Blind takes. Smalling fouls. Mourinho stands on the touchline frowning enigmatically.

8.28pm GMT

42 min: Lukaku bustles through the middle of the park and lays off to Martial on the left, just inside the Benfica area. Martial’s first touch isn’t all that, forcing him further to the left, and he blazes hysterically over the bar.

8.26pm GMT

40 min: Lingard has a crack from the edge of the Benfica box. It’s deflected and looks like going out for a corner, well wide to the right of goal. But Svilar sprints to make up loads of ground, and saves the ball going out for the set piece. After his nightmare in Lisbon, it’s going pretty well this week for the young man.

8.25pm GMT

38 min: Martial’s been United’s star turn so far this evening. He’s been an effervescent presence down the left. Once again he runs at Benfica with purpose and extreme prejudice, beating one man, then another. He’s into the box, and if he gets round Ruben Dias, he’ll be through on goal. But the defender does well to get a touch on the ball, and Martial runs it out of play for a goal kick. But here’s a player who looks as though he’s slowly getting back to his best. He’s very exciting to watch when he’s in this mood.

8.23pm GMT

37 min: Salvio latches onto a loose ball in the midfield; Old Trafford groans a little. The home side haven’t quite clicked yet tonight. Salvio threatens to break into the box, but he’s stopped by a determined McTominay, which cheers the faithful right up.

8.22pm GMT

35 min: A fine mist suddenly rolls in. Manchester United’s desire is to score; Mata and Lukaku combine crisply down the inside right. Mata breaks into the box, and his snap shot, meant for the top right, is deflected out for a corner. But United don’t get that corner.

8.19pm GMT

33 min: For the first time this evening, the game gets a little scrappy and shapeless. Hey, everyone deserves a breather, they’ve put on quite a free-flowing show so far.

8.17pm GMT

31 min: Lukaku has been quiet, but he twists and turns down the inside-right channel and carves out a shooting opportunity from bugger all. He fizzes it towards the bottom right and it’s well tipped round the post by Svilar. Nothing comes of the corner, but United soon come straight back at Benfica, Martial romping down the left and crossing for Lukaku, who leaning back heads a slightly-too-high ball over the bar from six yards. The big man suddenly sparking into life.

8.15pm GMT

29 min: Martial nearly shimmies past three challenges down the United left, with a view to breaking clear towards the box. One man too many, but what a ball-on-string run that was for a while. Then Benfica go up the other end, playing some pretty triangles along the way. Salvio has a dig from the edge of the box, but it’s blocked.

8.13pm GMT

27 min: And it would appear Lingard has been booked as well, for re-entering the field of play after his injury with out permission. This match has been highly eventful, and a lot of fun. The denizens of Old Trafford want entertainment; well, they’re getting it, one way or another.

8.11pm GMT

25 min: Bailly is booked for a common-or-garden trip on Grimaldo, who was looking to break into a little space on the left from deep.

8.10pm GMT

24 min: McTominay and Mata combine, the latter breaking into the box on the right. Mata’s face is soon introduced to the turf, Fejsa knocking into his back. If the Bailly-Pizzi incident should have been a penalty, that one ticks the box too. But the referee again gives nothing. At least he’s consistent.

8.08pm GMT

22 min: Lingard is getting some treatment, in a lot of pain after receiving an accidental elbow in the ribs from Samaris. He’ll continue for now, but doesn’t look awfully comfortable.

8.07pm GMT

20 min: Benfica look in the mood tonight. Salvio embarks on the sort of dribble Eusebio would have been proud of, spinning and twirling his way down the inside-right channel past three half-arsed United challenges. He then lays off for Pizzi, whose shot from the edge of the box is blocked at source. The ball breaks to Jimenez on the penalty spot, but the striker’s offside.

8.04pm GMT

18 min: Goncalves cuts in from the left wing and sends a rising screamer towards the top right. It’s the sweetest of strikes, and the most spectacular of saves by the ever-astonishing David de Gea! He manages to tip the ball round the post when all looked lost for United, and the scoreline, super-improbably, is still 0-0.

8.03pm GMT

15 min: Martial misses it! He sends a poor dribbler towards the bottom left. Svilar reads it well, and palms it round the post! What a difference two weeks make for the young keeper!

8.01pm GMT

14 min: And now there’s a penalty to United up the other end! Martial wriggles into the area from the left. Douglas gets his body in the way, then falls over and clanks his hand on the ball. The ref points to the spot. Benfica are livid, given the non-decision up the other end. It’s a soft one, for sure, but soft ones are penalties too.

8.00pm GMT

13 min: Pizzi goes down under a very meaty shoulder barge from Bailly, as he races into the box down the inside left channel. No penalty, though you’ve seen them given, certainly often as a foul elsewhere on the pitch. Just a suggestion that Bailly caught him in the back as opposed to from the side.

7.58pm GMT

11 min: Benfica keep United pressed back, and Raul Jimenez tries an overhead kick, latching onto a right-wing cross. Full marks for ambition, if nothing else.

7.57pm GMT

10 min: Some more pretty Benfica passing. Douglas very nearly breaks into the box down the inside-right channel, but McTominay does just enough to put him off. More luck than judgement, perhaps, as he was falling backwards at the time, but you do what you have to do. Just for a split second, though, Benfica had worked a small gap in the famous Jose Mourinho defence.

7.54pm GMT

8 min: It’s a nice open start, this. Benfica stroke the ball hither and yon, and suddenly the late arrival Samaris has space to shoot, 25 yards from goal. He fizzes a fierce low shot inches wide of the bottom-left corner. De Gea almost certainly had that covered, but a fine effort nonetheless.

7.53pm GMT

7 min: Martial tries to whip one up over the wall and back down into the top left. He gets the up part correct. Miles wide and high of Svilar’s goal.

7.52pm GMT

6 min: Martial, out on the left, turns on the jets and glides inside, shaping to shoot on the edge of the D. He’s upended cynically by Ruben Dias, who is rightly booked. This will be a free kick in a very dangerous position.

7.51pm GMT

4 min: Lingard goes scampering through the middle, free of Benfica defenders! But he’s offside. Svilar isn’t to know that, though, and does very well to slide towards Lingard’s feet and knock the ball away from the striker. That will have taken guts, given what happened to him in the last match in Lisbon. A perfectly timed piece of goalkeeping.

7.49pm GMT

3 min: The set piece is hoicked into the mixer, and hits Smalling in his trouser arrangement, six yards out. Ooyah, oof. For a second, it looks as though this unfortunate business has sent the ball into the top right, but de Gea has it covered easily enough and plucks it from the sky with a yawn.

7.48pm GMT

2 min: Benfica ping it around a bit, getting used to the surroundings. And it’s a confident start, Douglas making good down the right and earning a corner off Blind.

7.46pm GMT

And we’re off! Benfica have been forced into a late change to their starting XI; Filipe Augusto injured himself in the warm-up, so he’s replaced in the midfield by Andreas Samaris. Manchester United get the ball rolling. No other early drama.

7.43pm GMT

The teams are out! Manchester United wear their famous red shirts. Benfica, who are partial to that colour of top as well, are forced into second-choice grey. The usual Uefa-sanctioned bombast quacks out of the PA system. We’ll be off in a minute!

7.37pm GMT

Jose Mourinho speaks! “We have only three midfield players at this moment. We managed to give 60 mins rest to Nemanja Matic at Swansea; Ander Herrera has played every match, so it is time for him to have a break. Today is obviously a big match for Scott McTominay, but we believe in him and he is ready. The Chelsea game at the weekend is not on my mind at all; the important thing is to qualify for the Champions League and we are not there yet.”

He’s then asked if he expects the crowd to get behind his team. A non-committal shrug which suggests he’s said his piece in the programme notes and doesn’t fancy going over it again, not now anyway. “I don’t know. They normally are. We have enjoyed some good moments at Old Trafford and this season we are having good results, let’s see if we can continue that.”

7.00pm GMT

Manchester United make six changes to the side sent out against Tottenham at the weekend. Stepping down: Phil Jones, Ashley Young, Ander Herrera, Henrikh Mkhitaryan, Antonio Valencia and Marcus Rashford. Taking their places: Daley Blind, Matteo Darmian, Scott McTominay, Juan Mata, Jesse Lingard and Anthony Martial.

Benfica name the same side that took on United at the Estadio da Luz a fortnight ago, with the exception of the suspended Luisao. In comes captain Jardel. Rookie keeper Mile Svilar, whose debut didn’t exactly go to plan back there, is given another chance to showcase his talent. Here’s hoping that, whatever the result, the young man suffers no mishaps tonight and gives a good account of himself.

6.53pm GMT

Manchester United: de Gea, Darmian, Bailly, Smalling, Blind, McTominay, Matic, Mata, Lingard, Martial, Lukaku.
Subs: Romero, Lindelof, Young, Rashford, Herrera, Mkhitaryan, Shaw.

Benfica: Svilar, Douglas, Jardel, Dias, Grimaldo, Pizzi, Fejsa, Filipe Augusto, Salvio, Jimenez, Goncalves.
Subs: Julio Cesar, Lopez, Samaris, Jonas, Seferovic, Eliseu, Cervi.

6.51pm GMT

United Review: A beaming Jose Mourinho welcomes the paying punters to Old Trafford in his own inimitable style.

10.48am GMT

... which could see Manchester United book their place in the knockout phase in quick order. They’ll make it to the Round of 16 if they beat Portuguese giants Benfica here tonight, and CSKA Moscow fail to beat second-placed Basel in the group’s other game.

United are odds-on to complete their half of the deal. They saw off Benfica easily enough in Lisbon a couple of weeks ago, thanks to Marcus Rashford’s speculative free kick and Mile Svilar’s egregious error. While United have won all three of their Group A matches to date, Benfica have lost every single one of theirs, including a 5-0 defeat in Basel which stands as their worst-ever Champions League thumping.

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Published on October 31, 2017 14:39

October 28, 2017

Bournemouth v Chelsea: Premier League – live!

Eden Hazard scored the only goal of a match Chelsea dominated.

7.20pm BST

And that’s that! Chelsea are the thoroughly deserved winners; the only wonder is how Bournemouth restricted them to one goal. Eden Hazard’s strike allows Chelsea to reclaim fourth place in the Premier League; Bournemouth remain a point and three goals below the relegation line in 19th place. Chelsea are grinding out results right now; the sign of a good team, all that. But they’re still pinging it around in a very pretty fashion. Next week, Jose Mourinho pays a return visit to Stamford Bridge. It promises to be a cracker.

7.19pm BST

90 min +3: Bournemouth get a shot on target at last! And it nearly earns them a point. Surman and Ibe combine well down the middle, and suddenly the ball breaks to Steve Cook, just to the left of the D. He lashes a hard riser goalwards. Courtois is behind it all the way, snaffling and falling to the ground in relief.

7.18pm BST

90 min +2: There will be four added minutes. We’ve already had two utterly uneventful ones.

7.17pm BST

90 min: A throw for Bournemouth, deep in Chelsea territory down the right. Steve Cook launches it long. Courtois bravely comes off his line, bursts through and over a forest of players, and claims with ease. What fine, confident, assertive goalkeeping. I wonder what he talks to Simon Mignolet about when they’re on international duty?

7.15pm BST

88 min: Francis is booked for a cynical check on Alonso as Chelsea attempt another break upfield. Both teams look a little nervous right now, for different reasons.

7.14pm BST

87 min: Francis swings a glorious deep cross in from the right. Zappacosta does extremely well to head the ball clear at the far post under pressure from Wilson. Chelsea zip upfield, Willian chasing after a long hoick. Begovic comes out of his box to head clear ... and heads it straight at Willian! But he does well to challenge the winger to the second bounce, and mop up his mess. What nonsense.

7.12pm BST

86 min: Fabregas plays a delightful ball round the corner to set Zappacosta clear down the right. The flag goes up for offside. Zappacosta kicks the ball away to waste a little time, and gets away with it.

7.11pm BST

85 min: Hazard is replaced by Willian.

7.10pm BST

83 min: Bakayoko robs Daniels in the middle of the park. Alonso is sent scampering up the other end. He feeds Hazard down the left. Hazard in turn shuttles the ball on for Fabregas, who is near the byline but looks to curl the ball round Begovic and into the top right. That’s close, but high and wide. A real chance to seal the win spurned through an over-complicated approach.

7.08pm BST

82 min: Bournemouth still haven’t mustered a shot on target.

7.07pm BST

81 min: ... nothing occurs. It’s a total waste of time, Surman sending it straight over a crowded area and out for a goal kick.

7.06pm BST

80 min: Pugh and Daniels combine well down the left to earn a corner for Bournemouth. From which ...

7.05pm BST

79 min: A double change by Chelsea: Pedro and Morata off, Batshuayi and Drinkwater on.

7.04pm BST

77 min: Chelsea wrest back control with some studied possession in the middle of the field. The clock is their friend.

7.02pm BST

75 min: Wilson’s first contribution is to become involved in a three-man attack with Ibe and Pugh. The move ends with the superb Luiz blocking Wilson’s speculative shot. Chelsea hearts were in mouths for a second or two there. Chelsea have been totally dominant, but there’s just the one goal in it.

7.01pm BST

73 min: Another muscle pull suffered by a Bournemouth player: this could be a costly evening for the Cherries going forward. Afobe is the victim this time. On comes Callum Wilson, to warm cheers from fans fully aware of his long journey back from ACL injuries. The world of football will be wishing him all the luck.

6.58pm BST

72 min: Adam Smith does very well to reach a long ball down the right wing, and hook it into the Chelsea box. Running from deep, Pugh meets it with his head on the edge of the area, but he can’t guide his effort anywhere near the goal.

6.57pm BST

70 min: Chelsea ping it around in the middle. Bournemouth are chasing shadows again. Conte’s tantrum appears to have done the trick, knocking the visitors back up a gear or two.

6.54pm BST

68 min: Pedro has a whack from 25 yards. Straight down Begovic’s throat.

6.54pm BST

67 min: Luiz looks to be in an awful lot of trouble, pinned in near his own corner flag on the left. But he one-twos with Rudiger, then threads a delightful ball up the wing for Pedro, who scampers into acres. Pedro’s ball further down the channel, intended to release Alonso into the box, is really poor, and Francis can slide the ball away from danger. That would have been a sensational goal, given Luiz’s stylish escape down the other end; a shame the move broke down.

6.52pm BST

66 min: More space for Ibe, a bit further out this time. This shot sails into orbit. But after going close a few minutes ago, you can’t fault him for having another pop.

6.51pm BST

64 min: Chelsea respond to their irate manager’s wishes. Hazard surveys the situation, then suddenly fires a pass down the inside-right channel for Pedro in the area. Pedro flicks it back inside for Hazard to run onto. Hazard gets there, but sends a shot sailing miles over the bar. Better from Chelsea, who had slowed down dramatically a couple of minutes after the goal.

6.49pm BST

62 min: Stanislas has pulled a muscle, and Pugh comes on in his stead. While the game is stopped, Conte takes the opportunity to come to the touchline and give his team a very expressive bollocking.

6.48pm BST

60 min: Some fine pressing by Bournemouth. Rudiger isn’t allowed to clear down the left. Alonso is stopped hoicking a clearance up the other wing. Eventually Courtois slices a panicked clearance out of play. Nothing comes of the resulting throw, deep in Chelsea territory, and Courtois claims. But this is a very impressive response to falling behind by Bournemouth, especially after rocking violently in the immediate wake of conceding.

6.45pm BST

58 min: Ibe very nearly spins and turns past Rudiger down the right. The Chelsea defender does well to recover and hack out for a throw. Steve Cook launches long, but it’s easily cleared by Chelsea, who zip upfield. Hazard makes off up the left. Adam Smith slides in, and is booked for the clumsy foul that follows.

6.43pm BST

57 min: And suddenly a chance for Ibe! Luiz and Fabregas run into each other 35 yards from their own goal. The ball breaks to Stanislas, who rolls it forward to Ibe. The sub has space and time on the edge of the area, but his powerful rising drive is deflected over the bar for a corner. The set piece comes to nothing.

6.42pm BST

56 min: Bournemouth enjoy a little possession in the midfield. They go nowhere, but that’s not really the point; they desperately need a few seconds to catch their breath and regroup after conceding the opening goal.

6.40pm BST

54 min: Bakayoko balloons wildly from 25 yards. Chelsea are in the mood for more.

6.40pm BST

53 min: Pedro, Hazard and Zappacosta run very fast at the Bourmemouth back line. Danger is just about kept at arm’s length this time. But the hosts are rocking.

6.38pm BST

Morata wriggles away from three opponents in the centre circle. He wedges a pass down the inside left. Francis should hoick clear, but air kicks. Hazard scoots into the area and bashes a shot towards the near post. In it goes. Begovic should have done much better. Think Heighway v Wilson in the 1971 FA Cup final. Mistakes all round by the hosts.

6.37pm BST

50 min: Morata and Hazard eat up the yards in the middle of the park. Hazard eventually rolls a pass down the left for Alonso, who is in acres. He fires a low cross through the box. Pedro wasn’t too far away from meeting that in the middle, but not quite.

6.34pm BST

48 min: Lewis Cook has a batter from the best part of 35 yards. Ambitious. It would have worked out well in rugby.

6.33pm BST

47 min: Chelsea are immediately on the front foot, Morata probing down the right. Then Fabregas tries to get something moving through the middle, but neither shoots nor passes. We were here early on in the first half with Fabregas. He looks as frustrated now as he did back then.

6.32pm BST

And we’re off again! “I admire your steadfast refusal to refer to Bournemouth’s home ground as anything other than Dean Court,” writes Mr Morris. “None of this Vitality Stadium nonsense from the Manchester Guardian.” Quite. Anyway, Bournemouth & Boscombe Athletic kick off, having made a change: Ibe on, Defoe off. Can he trouble the Pensioners?

6.19pm BST

Half-time news service: Just in case you haven’t heard, England have just won a World Cup. Not the World Cup, but this version’s surely enough to be getting on with.

6.17pm BST

And right on the stroke of 45 minutes, the whistle goes. Chelsea have been utterly dominant, but the hosts have held firm - and on another day, might have even carved out a goal or two themselves. How it’s still 0-0 is anyone’s guess. It promises to be an entertaining second half. Go nowhere!

6.15pm BST

43 min: Pedro and Hazard combine down the inside-right channel, setting up Fabregas six yards out. Steve Cook and Begovic combine to block the resulting shot. Bournemouth have been staunch at the back, but they surely can’t keep on like this. Chelsea have been very lively in attack, without ever quite slipping into Scintillating Mode.

6.12pm BST

41 min: More of the Chelsea tiki-taka. Ping, ping, ping. Eventually Hazard clips one in from the right, and Pedro attempts to flick a header onwards and into the top left. He doesn’t quite catch it. This 0-0 scoreline is quite a puzzle.

6.11pm BST

39 min: Bournemouth win a corner down the right, and work the set piece nicely, eventually finding Francis in space out on the same wing. Francis whips it into the box. Afobe rises with a view to banging a header goalwards, but he’s foiled by the top of the ever-excellent Azpilicueta’s head, which glances the cross away. Just for a split second there, after being under the cosh for so long, it looked as though the Cherries might snatch the lead.

6.09pm BST

38 min: Alonso, out on the left, smashes a strange howitzer of a cross through the Bournemouth box. Perhaps he was looking for a crazy could-go-anywhere deflection. He didn’t get one.

6.08pm BST

36 min: They’ve just showed a rerun of the disallowed Chelsea goal. Azpilicueta’s kneecap was offside as Luiz shot from the edge of the area, so the decision was technically correct. But in real time, it’s the sort of decision the attacking side might have expected to go their way. Yes, one of those.

6.06pm BST

34 min: Some gorgeous Chelsea triangles, and suddenly Hazard traps and turns 30 yards from goal. He gives the ball to Morata, who drops a shoulder and shifts his feet to send Francis the wrong direction. Space to shoot, just inside the box. Begovic somehow deflects his shot over the bar with a strong left arm. Corner = waste of time.

6.03pm BST

32 min: Another purposeful run by Zappacosta down the right. He reaches the byline but can’t find anyone with his low cross. He’s popping up every couple of minutes down that wing, causing all manner of problems.

6.02pm BST

31 min: Hazard wheechs down the right wing and suddenly pulls one back for Zappacosta, who shoots from the edge of the box. His effort is deflected out for a corner kick, from which nothing comes.

6.01pm BST

30 min: Daniels crosses deep from the left wing, forcing a panicked Luiz into heading behind for a Bournemouth corner. The set piece is a load of nonsense. This is a nice open game; goodness knows how it’s still goalless.

6.00pm BST

28 min: Rudiger again looks for Zappacosta with a left-to-right diagonal ball. Ake eyebrows an interception out for a corner. The set piece is worked to Luiz on the edge of the area. Luiz blooters goalwards. Begovic can only parry, because Azpilicueta was in the road. Morata slams home the rebound. But the flag goes up for offside, Azpilicueta the culprit. That looked extremely tight; probably onside, and even if he was a smidgen off, it was so close you’d have thought the benefit of the doubt would go to the attacking team. But Bournemouth get away with one.

5.57pm BST

26 min: Zappacosta earns Chelsea a corner down the right. The set piece is flown long for Bakayoko, who aims a header towards the top left from ten yards, but gets no pace behind it. Begovic gently plucks from the sky.

5.56pm BST

24 min: Begovic shanks a dreadful clearance straight to Hazard, 25 yards out. Hazard slips the ball straight forward to Morata, who is inside the area and only has the hapless keeper to beat. But he pulls his first-time shot wide left of the post when it was surely easier to tuck it past Begovic and home. Cue some lyrical Spanish phrases, delivered with feeling.

5.54pm BST

23 min: Hazard is at the centre of a lot of crisp tiki-taka on the edge of the Bournemouth box. He can’t quite find a killer pass; he’s never quite in enough space to receive one. The move peters out.

5.53pm BST

21 min: Throw for Bournemouth deep in Chelsea territory down the left. Daniels shapes to Delap a long throw into the area ... and instead flings it short. Bad idea; the training-ground move peters out quietly. Unfashionable to say things like this, of course, but he might as well have stuck that in the mixer.

5.51pm BST

19 min: Chelsea go up the other end and nearly score. Fabregas probes, sending Pedro scampering into the area down the right. Pedro fizzes a cross to the near post, where Morata lurks. He can’t quite clip home, and the ball’s deflected out for a corner. Nothing comes from that set piece either. In a parallel universe, it’s 1-1.

5.50pm BST

18 min: So having said that, here’s Bournemouth haring forward en masse, Afobe picking up possession 30 yards from goal with Chelsea hectically backpedalling. He’s got options either side. Daniels is in acres to his left, and he finds him, but only with a terribly heavy pass that pushes his man miles wide of goal. He should be clear in the box and shooting, but all he can do is pull back from the byline. Afobe takes a snapshot that’s deflected out for a futile corner. What a waste.

5.48pm BST

16 min: It’s not quite sparked into life yet, this match. Nearly, but not quite. Chelsea are in a patient mood, while Bournemouth are happy to sit back and soak up whatever’s thrown at them.

5.46pm BST

14 min: Rudiger, deep on the left, sprays a glorious diagonal pass towards Zappacosta, haring into the box from the right. He takes a touch and prepares to shoot from a tight angle. Ake comes across, sliding the ball out of play. A wonderful saving tackle, especially as he’s blocked the ball back onto Zappacosta before it goes behind. Goal kick.

5.45pm BST

13 min: Bakayoko slips in the middle of the park, allowing Lewis Cook to make off upfield. Chelsea are light at the back, and Defoe is screaming for a pass down the inside-left channel he can skitter onto, but the ball’s not coming. Eventually Cook is stripped of possession.

5.43pm BST

12 min: Chelsea are beginning to dominate possession. That isn’t stopping the home support from making a hell of a racket, which they’re doing in a continuous and very rhythmical fashion.

5.40pm BST

10 min: Fabregas, sitting in front of the centre circle, slips a pass forward for Pedro, who glides in from the inside-right channel to the centre, where there’s space aplenty. He should really bomb as far forward as possible before shooting, but elects to blooter one goalwards from 25 yards. It flies hysterically over the crossbar. He should have at least troubled Begovic, so much space did he have to play with.

5.38pm BST

8 min: Luiz rakes a long pass down the right, and Pedro finds himself in more space. Another cross, and this one’s headed clear easily enough by Steve Cook. But Chelsea are quickly coming back at the hosts, Fabregas shaping to shoot from 20 yards. His attempted pass into the bottom left doesn’t have much power in it, and it’s blocked pretty much at source.

5.37pm BST

6 min: Now it’s Chelsea’s turn to have a relaxed stroke. Behave will you. After some slick passing in the middle of the park, Pedro makes a break down the right and hooks a high one into the Bournemouth box. Begovic rises to claim easily enough.

5.35pm BST

4 min: More of the Bournemouth patient passing. They’re not really going anywhere, but then that’s not the point early doors against the champions of England. Daniels finally makes a move, haring down the left, but his low cross towards Defoe is easily snaffled by Rudiger.

5.33pm BST

2 min: Bournemouth stroke the ball around awhile, getting a feel of the thing. There’s a cracking atmosphere at Dean Court, both sets of fans giving it plenty.

5.32pm BST

And we’re off! Chelsea get the ball rolling. Within 40 seconds, Fabregas has the ball at his feet just in front of the Bournemouth D, but he dithers, neither shooting nor passing, and the chance of a very quick start for the champions is gone. Bournemouth quietly clear their lines.

5.30pm BST

But before we get going, there’s a minute of silence, respect and reflection, in honour of the fallen, this being Bournemouth’s last home game before Remembrance Sunday. It’s beautifully observed.

5.28pm BST

The teams are out at Dean Court! Bournemouth are in their John Bond AC Milan black and red, while Chelsea wear their white away shirts. The night is drawing in but the weather is behaving on the last day of British Summer Time. We’ll be off in a minute!

5.10pm BST

Antonio Conte talks! “I always see the right attitude from my players, every day and every moment. Cahill is on the bench as part of rotation. We have to play in the Champions League. When I can do rotation, I will do it.”

5.08pm BST

Eddie Howe speaks! “Winning is the only thing that truly gives confidence, so we’re buoyed by the week we’ve had and hopefully we can finish it off. You have to prepare for every game in this league separately, so we do have to tweak things for specific teams and specific games, and hopefully we’ll have got it right. We’ll see if Defoe can complete 90 minutes; he’s trained well but how long he plays will be dictated by his performance.”

4.42pm BST

The hosts make two changes to the team that won at Stoke City last weekend. Jordon Ibe and Lys Mousset drop to the bench, to be replaced by Steve Cook and Jermain Defoe.

Chelsea meanwhile make just the one change to the starting XI named ahead of their 4-2 win over Watford last Saturday. Gary Cahill takes a well-deserved rest in the dugout, as Davide Zappacosta steps up.

4.37pm BST

Bournemouth: Begovic, Francis, S Cook, Ake, A Smith, L Cook, Surman, Daniels, Stanislas, Afobe, Defoe.
Subs: Boruc, Gosling, Pugh, Arter, Wilson, Mousset, Ibe.

Chelsea: Courtois, Azpilicueta, Luiz, Rudiger, Zappacosta, Fabregas, Bakayoko, Alonso, Pedro, Morata, Hazard.
Subs: Caballero, Drinkwater, Willian, Batshuayi, Cahill, Christensen, Ampadu.

11.12am BST

... in which Bournemouth attempt to follow up their win at Stoke with victory over the champions, and clamber out of the relegation mire. Meanwhile Chelsea hope to stay on the leading pack’s coat-tails despite a slightly unconvincing start to the season.

Bournemouth won their first-ever Premier League match against Chelsea, 1-0 at Stamford Bridge in December 2015 thanks to a late Glenn Murray goal. But since then it’s been Chelsea all the way: 4-1 at Dean Court, 3-0 at Stamford Bridge, 3-1 at Dean Court. Chelsea do like to be beside the seaside, beside the sea; can Eddie Howe’s men put an end to their free-scoring south-coast shenanigans? We’ll find out soon enough. It’s on!

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Published on October 28, 2017 11:25

Manchester United 1-0 Tottenham Hotspur: Premier League – as it happened

A late route-one Anthony Martial goal sealed the points for United.

2.43pm BST

2.23pm BST

And that’s that! Anthony Martial’s late goal secures a precious three points for Manchester United! They’ll remain on Manchester City’s tail; Spurs by contrast could be eight adrift by the end of the day, depending on how Pep Guardiola’s side do at West Bromwich Albion. Spurs will rue Dele Alli’s miss just before Martial’s decisive strike, but in truth United were the better side in the second half and always the most likely to snatch the win. United close to within two of City at the top, for a couple of hours at least.

2.21pm BST

90 min +2: A couple of throws down the Spurs right come to nothing. Lingard chases a United throw up the other end, but can’t get clear. Young is replaced by Darmian.

2.20pm BST

90 min: A free kick for Spurs in the midfield. A chance to load the United box and hit long. Eriksen takes. De Gea flaps a bit, only half clearing. But Spurs can’t take advantage, and suddenly a big boot upfield sends Lingard clear in the Spurs half! A great chance to wrap it up, but he panics and blooters wildly over the bar from the edge of the box. There will be three added minutes.

2.17pm BST

88 min: Old Trafford is bouncing. Such a potentially crucial goal from Martial. Spurs are wandering around in a collective funk right now. The game’s gone bitty and they can’t put any pressure on the hosts.

2.16pm BST

86 min: Alli clatters into Young, a legacy of that first-half brouhaha. Young takes the opportunity to go down and eat up some time in the professional style. Alli’s not happy about it, but he can only blame himself.

2.14pm BST

84 min: Space for Eriksen down the right. He curls deep for Alli, but Bailly is always winning that battle.

2.13pm BST

83 min: United have been by far the better side in this second half. On the balance of play, they deserve their lead. But can they hold on? Spurs have upped the tempo, and the home side are sitting back. This could be quite a final few minutes!

2.12pm BST

First off, Spurs get the ball in the net: Dier and Winks shuttle the ball left to right, Aurier slams a low ball across goal, and Alli follows it in at the far post. But Aurier had stupidly strayed offside, nixing a very promising move. De Gea hoicks the free kick forward. Lukaku rises to flick a header on. Martial gets a yard on Vertonghen and, running down the inside-left channel, guides a ball past Lloris and into the bottom right! Such a basic goal for Spurs to concede. But from United’s view, it’s Reeptastic!

2.09pm BST

79 min: And now they nearly go ahead! Lingard makes off down the right and swings a glorious cross onto the head of Lukaku, rising above Alderweireld on the penalty spot. His effort beats Lloris but smacks off the right-hand post and away. All in slow motion. Now it’s Tottenham’s turn to survive!

2.07pm BST

77 min: More of the patient Spurs passing. Eriksen, sitting deep, suddenly springs to life and wedges a glorious ball forward for Alli, who is on Smalling’s shoulder and bursting into the box. Alli gets a yard on the defender, and reaches the ball ahead of the out-rushing de Gea. But Alli’s feathered touch past the keeper sails past the left-hand post. It wasn’t the easiest chance, but Alli is such a good player you’d expect him to score. United survive!

2.05pm BST

75 min: Spurs ping it around in the patient style. Suddenly, having hypnotised United into sleepiness, Dembele, down the inside left, slips a ball inside to Eriksen, who is clear 25 yards from goal! But Eriksen’s first touch isn’t the best, and he hesitates too, so when he eventually has a shot, it’s wild and snatched. That was a chance to trouble de Gea spurned. Spurs haven’t had too many of those this afternoon.

2.04pm BST

74 min: Valencia is booked for an amateurish dive in the Spurs box, as he cuts in from the right. An easy decision for the referee.

2.03pm BST

73 min: Llorente wins a header on the edge of the United box and very nearly sets Eriksen up for a break free into the area. Not quite. United clear, and suddenly Lukaku is bombing down the inside-left channel. He powers into the Spurs box and shoots across Lloris, aiming for the bottom right. It’s a fine effort, but Lloris sticks out a strong hand to palm clear.

2.01pm BST

71 min: Martial comes on for Rashford. He’s quickly involved in some scrappy action along the front of the Spurs box. Nothing comes of it, but the home team look the most likely to break the deadlock.

2.00pm BST

69 min: Rashford, deep on the left wing, attempts to set Lukaku free with a curling rake down the middle. Not quite, and Lloris gathers, but what ambition. A few seconds earlier, Dembele had slid into a tackle with Herrera, the latter falling easily then finding the former up in his grille the second he stood back up. It’s more pantomime silliness, and once again we move on without fuss.

1.58pm BST

68 min: Eriksen and Aurier one-two their way down the inside-right channel. Nice, crisp football. Aurier then tries to free Eriksen into the area, but his sliderule pass along the channel is too strong. He could have shot himself, as well. As it is, United’s goal is untroubled.

1.56pm BST

66 min: United respond to the Spurs shuffle with a swap of their own. Off goes Mkhitaryan, on comes Lingard. “I do like Llorente but no one seems to be fussed that at this stage in their respective spells at Spurs both Soldado and Janssen had scored,” notes John Tumbridge.

1.55pm BST

65 min: Rashford and Mkhitaryan combine down the left and earn a corner for United. The latter takes. Llorente meets it at the near post, and nearly slices the ball into his own net. Another corner, once again taken by Mkhitaryan. It’s only half cleared. Valencia meets it at the right-hand corner of the D. He nearly pearls one into the top left. It’s an inch away from sensational. It would have rivalled his recent strike against Everton. What a shot that was!

1.52pm BST

63 min: It’s a proper Mancunian day now, with the rain coming down in stair rods.

1.51pm BST

62 min: Spurs make a double change. Son is replaced by Llorente, while Dembele comes on for Sissoko.

1.49pm BST

60 min: ... Rashford fails to beat the first man. Son generously tries to help United out by skying a clearance, causing a brief kerfuffle in the Spurs box as the ball returns from orbit. But Spurs deal with the problem, and there goes that pressure.

1.48pm BST

59 min: Dier is very nearly outstripped for pace by Rashford on the left. He’s forced to concede a corner. The first set piece leads to another, from which ...

1.47pm BST

57 min: A couple more probes from Rashford cause Spurs some worry. United have suddenly gone up a gear, and the crowd have cranked up the volume by way of reward. Once again, Spurs are starting the half slowly. Can they respond like they did in the first?

1.46pm BST

55 min: Spurs suddenly look uncharacteristically shaky at the back. Mkhitaryan latches onto a loose Davies header and has a dig from the edge of the box. Lloris spills it. Rashford is waiting to smash home from a couple of yards, but Davies makes up for it with a wonderful last-ditch slide and hook. Then United come again through Mkhitaryan down the left. He reaches the byline but his ball inside is blasted clear by Vertonghen. Finally Valencia has a smack, coming in from the right, but his effort is blocked and after some ricochets, it’s a goal kick to Spurs.

1.43pm BST

53 min: Spurs put a few passes together for the first time since the restart. Vertonghen eventually breaks into space down the inside left. He threatens to shoot, but instead feeds Davies, who tees up Eriksen to the left of the United D. Eriksen attempts a curler into the top right, but his effort is all wrong.

1.40pm BST

51 min: Young turns on the jets and makes good down the left. It’s a brilliant run. He crosses hard and low towards the near post. Lloris claims, though Rashford wasn’t far away from getting a toe to that.

1.40pm BST

49 min: Herrera nicks the ankles of Alli and gets a slap in the chops for his trouble as the pair fall. All in one smooth movement. Nothing to worry the ref, though it’s fairly clear that United have decided to target Alli’s hair-trigger temper since that incident with Young on the half hour. They’ve been taking turns to work him over. All part of the dance.

1.37pm BST

47 min: Mkhitaryan and Valencia combine well down the right wing, but can’t quite open Spurs up. They try again, Davies bundling Valencia over out on the right touchline. Free kick. Just about every player on the field lines up on the edge of the Tottenham box. Mkhitaryan balloons the free kick over them all and out of play on the left. What a waste. But again, United start the half strongly.

1.34pm BST

And we’re off again! Manchester United get the second half underway at a drizzly Old Trafford. No changes by either side.

1.21pm BST

Half-time admin:

1.20pm BST

Rashford’s effort doesn’t beat the first man. Half cleared. A throw back into the box. Matic goes down, claiming to have been dragged to the floor by Vertonghen, but there didn’t appear to be much in that. And that’s pretty much your lot for the first half. Not a single gilt-edged chance to speak of, and yet it was a very entertaining half of ebb and flow. Don’t go anywhere, we’ll be back before you know it!

1.17pm BST

45 min: There will be one minute of added time. And United are awarded a free kick out on the right. A chance to load the box.

1.17pm BST

43 min: Herrera slides in with two feet on Son. The referee gives him a good talking to, as he was sailing through the air for a split second there. But nobody makes a big fuss of it, and we move on.

1.14pm BST

41 min: Son feeds Aurier down the right. Aurier tries a curler towards the top left, but it’s deflected out for a corner. The set piece leads to a game of pinball in the United box. Eventually Dier, falling backwards, sticks out a telescopic leg and hooks an effort towards the top left from ten yards. There’s no power in that, and de Gea plucks it from the sky.

1.13pm BST

40 min: That’s got the Old Trafford crowd going again. As has a fairly meaty challenge from Valencia on Alli. Should have been a foul, but the referee is determined to keep this match flowing. This is a lot of high-octane fun.

1.11pm BST

39 min: United seriously come at Spurs for the first time in a wee while. Mkhitaryan nearly breaks through the middle, but not quite. Then Rashford has a dig from distance. It’s deflected out for a corner. The set piece, coming in from the left, falls to Herrera, level with the far stick, 12 yards out. He blooters wildly away from goal.

1.10pm BST

37 min: ... Alli’s header isn’t up to much. United clear. Mkhitaryan is bundled over on the halfway line. No foul, says the ref. Spurs come back at United, Alli sashaying into the box from the left. He opens his body and tries a cheeky dribbler towards the bottom right. Or was it a pass through a crowded area towards Son? Either way, it wasn’t very good.

1.09pm BST

36 min: Now it’s Vertonghen’s turn to channel his inner Beckenbauer; he romps down the inside-left channel from deep and earns a corner. From which ...

1.06pm BST

34 min: Aurier threatens to break into the United box, playing a long-distance one-two with Alli. Young does extremely well to slide in and hook away from danger, especially as it eventually transpires he’s been fouled by Aurier. Great defending, and United get the free kick anyway. But this is bubbling up nicely now!

1.05pm BST

32 min: A long pass down the middle very nearly releases the powerful Lukaku, but Alderweireld does very well to win a last-man header. Spurs clear their lines. That little set-to between Young and Alli appears to have woken snoozy United up. Clever Ashley!

1.04pm BST

30 min: Aurier’s arm clanks into Young’s startled coupon as the pair contest a high ball in the midfield. It looks accidental. Young thinks otherwise and loses the head a bit, arguing the toss with several Spurs players and the ref. Alli decides to get involved, and soon enough Alli and Young are nose to nose, giving it the big-man act. All good knockabout panto fun. The referee gets involved and points out how old they are. We move on.

1.01pm BST

28 min: Davies curls a cross in from the left. It should be an easy claim for de Gea, but as he rises to catch, Jones clatters into him. The ball spills to Son, who tees up Sissoko on the edge of the box. Fortunately for United, Sissoko’s shot towards an unguarded net is wild. Moments earlier, Dier had a chance to play Sissoko clear on the right, but didn’t see the pass. Spurs are well on top.

12.59pm BST

26 min: Spurs push United back without ever quite threatening to break them or find a way through. Eriksen hassles Herrera down the left. Matic is forced into a panicked header back towards de Gea; it requires Jones to hook clear in the last-ditch fashion with Son lurking. United are struggling.

12.57pm BST

24 min: Jones pings a long ball down the left wing for Lukaku to chase. Tottenham’s three centre halves step up and there’s the offside flag. Mourinho has moved down to the touchline to gesticulate at his players, who looked so sharp in the early moments of this game.

12.55pm BST

22 min: And now Spurs a corner down the right. It comes to nothing, but it further illustrates how quickly Spurs have got on top. United need to find a response; now it’s their turn to be second to everything, passes failing to stick.

12.54pm BST

20 min: In fact, they’re dominating it, all of a sudden. More pretty patterns. Sissoko is found in a huge pocket of space, 35 yards from goal. He sends an over-ambitious pea-roller down de Gea’s throat. Then Winks nearly finds Alli in the United box with a floated pass down the inside-right channel. Not quite. Finally Alderweireld, striding down the inside-right channel, attempts to rake home a Beckenbauer-style screamer from distance. Aiming for the top right, his effort ripples the side netting.

12.51pm BST

18 min: Spurs were incapable of stringing more than two passes together during the opening ten minutes. But now they’re pinging it around in the most pleasant style. Plenty of pretty triangles, with Eriksen and Winks at many a corner. They’re in this match now.

12.49pm BST

16 min: Spurs are beginning to find their feet, and fast. Son embarks on a power dribble down the inside left, zipping past Herrera with ease. But he doesn’t have the confidence to keep going; had he gambled on a couple more strides, he’d have been inside the box and shaping to shoot. Aurier tries to recycle the attack on the other wing, but Matic isn’t having any of it.

12.47pm BST

14 min: Spurs make their first tentative sortie upfield. Alli has the ball at his feet on the edge of the United D. He can’t work enough space to send a speculative effort on goal, so tries to find Son down the right with a pass. It’s wayward and United mop up.

12.46pm BST

13 min: The resulting corner comes to nought.

12.45pm BST

12 min: Mkhitaryan is brought down by Sissoko, the best part of 30 yards from goal. Rashford has a dig from the free kick anyway, and nearly lashes a low one into the bottom left. Lloris, slightly unsighted, does very well to turn it round the post.

12.43pm BST

10 min: A poor kick upfield by Lloris is returned immediately. Rashford and Lukaku take turns to shimmy and shake on the edge of the Spurs box, to the right of the D. A gap threatens to open up on a couple of occasions, but Dier slides around on the floor in a hysterical manner, doing enough to close the channels to goal. Eventually Lukaku gets fed up and lashes a wild shot-cum-cross out of play from a promising position on the right. Spurs breathe again.

12.41pm BST

8 min: Winks takes matters into his own hands with a special spin into space and a stride through midfield. He lays off to Sissoko, and the move breaks down quickly enough, but that’s better from the visitors. And from the most inexperienced player in their team as well. He’s a very promising talent.

12.39pm BST

7 min: United are well on top in these early exchanges, pressing fast and hard. Spurs getting a taste of their own medicine; they can’t retain possession at all.

12.38pm BST

5 min: The ball bobbles around in the random fashion. Time on the ball is at a premium right now. Then suddenly Young bursts down the left, past a couple of half-arsed Spurs challenges, and breaks into the box! He can shoot from a tight angle, but opts to pull one back for, well, whoever really. The cutback goes nowhere near a red shirt, and is easily cleared by Spurs.

12.35pm BST

3 min: Spurs haven’t settled yet at all. Eriksen has played a couple of passes into nowhere, and that’s pretty much the sum total of their contribution so far. Plenty of time to find their feet, of course.

12.34pm BST

2 min: United are on the front foot early doors all right. Lukaku powers down the inside-left channel and bursts towards the byline. He fires a low cross into the middle. Rashford is waiting to tap home, so it’s just as well for Spurs that Lloris gets down well at the near post to smother.

12.33pm BST

And we’re off! Pochettino looks relaxed in the dugout, smiling warmly. Mourinho has his gameface on. Spurs get the ball rolling, and lose it soon enough. Rashford is allowed a sprint down the left, but just as he threatens to break into the box, Alderweireld hassles him out of it.

12.31pm BST

But first a minute of silence and reflection, in memory of the fallen, this being United’s closest home fixture to Remembrance Sunday. Perfectly and beautifully observed.

12.29pm BST

The teams are out! Manchester United are in their famous red, white and black; Spurs are decked out in their equally storied lilywhite and dark blue. The whole look screams Classic Fixture, which to be fair this very much is. A most pleasant aesthetic treat. We’ll be off in a minute!

12.05pm BST

Mauricio Pochettino talks! “We must retain our philosophy. Harry is one of the best strikers in the world, and of course we are going to miss his quality. But the squad is so important. It’s important to be ready. And we will miss him but the team is ready to compete, to fight and to try to win. Today will be a tough game. Llorente could be a good impact from the bench.” And the response to Jose’s question, which Po’ Geoff has been ordered to ask, and heaven help him post-match if he doesn’t? “Of course they have a lot of injuries, and you always miss your players. But United have a great squad and they are so competitive. We have some injuries too. A manager wants all his players available and fit, but it’s a shame, they are human, they get injured and tired.”

11.55am BST

An entertainingly combative Jose Mourinho speaks! He starts by refusing to confirm how his team will line up. “I’m not saying we’re playing three at the back. You are saying that. We’re not.” He then slips into Platitude Mode for a while. “We want to win, but we are playing one of the best, if not the best, team in the league. But nothing can stop us thinking we can win. We will try to be dominant and try to win this match. We know we have a difficult job.” Then he’s asked by Sky’s Geoff Shreeves whether the dynamic changes given the absence of Harry Kane. And wahey! Here we go, as Jose visibly bristles. “You know, how does the dynamic change without Ibrahimovic, without Marcos Rojo, Michael Carrick, Paul Pogba, Marouane Fellaini? Did you ask Mauricio the same question with relation to my players who are not playing?” He’s informed Pochettino has yet to be interviewed. “Ah, so, do it, ask him how you approach the game without Pogba, without Fellaini, without Ibrahimovic, without Rojo, without Carrick, ask the same question to Maurice.” And that’s pretty much the thrust of it, a verbal dusting out of nothing. Pointless, some would argue, but then that’s half the fun. Poor Geoff. Pantomime brilliance. Say what you will about Mourinho, the man guarantees entertainment one way or another. He appears to be in the mood today.

11.41am BST

Both teams make three changes to the starting XIs sent out in their previous Premier League match. Manchester United drop Juan Mata, Anthony Martial and Jesse Lingard to the bench, calling up Henrikh Mkhitaryan, Marcus Rashford and Eric Bailly.

Tottenham meanwhile must make do without the hamstrung Harry Kane, while Kieran Trippier and Davison Sanchez are benched. In come Moussa Sissoko, Eric Dier and Ben Davies. Both teams playing three at the back.

11.31am BST

Manchester United: de Gea, Bailly, Smalling, Jones, Valencia, Herrera, Matic, Young, Mkhitaryan, Lukaku, Rashford.
Subs: Mata, Martial, Lingard, Blind, Romero, Darmian, McTominay.

Tottenham Hotspur: Lloris, Alderweireld, Dier, Vertonghen, Aurier, Eriksen, Winks, Alli, Davies, Sissoko, Son.
Subs: Trippier, Rose, Sanchez, Vorm, Nkoudou, Llorente, Dembele.

11.20am BST

While we wait for the team news ... lads, it’s Manchester United and Tottenham! Here’s a stone-cold classic from December 1986, right at the start of Fergie’s reign, and just as David Pleat’s fondly remembered side were beginning to get their chops up. It’s a rollercoaster ride, this, featuring one of the best training-ground free-kick routines you’ll ever see; a bullet diving header that will have given Keith Houchen ideas for later in the season; some set-piece defending which makes Jurgen Klopp’s Liverpool look like Internazionale circa 1964; and the dark, brooding, atmospheric caverns of 80s Old Trafford punctuated by the shimmering beacons of Sharp Electronics. Enjoy, enjoy!

10.06am BST

... in which Manchester United look to bounce back from their surprise defeat at Huddersfield Town, and prove their title credentials this lunchtime at Old Trafford with a big performance against one of the country’s top teams. An easy midweek League Cup win at Swansea got them back on the horse; now let’s see if this thing can gallop.

Three points would keep them on league leaders Manchester City’s tail, but visitors Tottenham Hotspur are desirous of the very same thing. They’re coming off the back of a very strange week indeed: a brilliant Champions League performance at the Bernabeu, a swashbuckling Premier League rout of Liverpool, a miserable League Cup capitulation against West Ham. They’ll be in the mood to regain some momentum and keep City honest too.

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Published on October 28, 2017 06:23

October 25, 2017

Tottenham Hotspur 2-3 West Ham United: Carabao Cup – as it happened

West Ham launched an astonishing second-half comeback at Wembley to stun Spurs, Andre Ayew the two-goal hero.

9.51pm BST

Well, well, well. Of course, it’d be easy to trot out a few Lads, It’s Tottenham jokes; new Spurs same as the old Spurs; all that jazz. But just as West Ham weren’t awful in the first half, Spurs weren’t particularly terrible in the second. It’s simply the case that the Hammers came out with such renewed purpose and intensity after the break, they’d have blown anybody away. They were quite magnificent to a man, and claim a thoroughly deserved place in the quarter finals. That’s a night that’ll be remembered for a long time in east London, not least because it’s bought Slaven Bilic some precious breathing space.

9.50pm BST

90 min +3: Eriksen presses and probes, but can’t find a route through. Ayew, the two-goal hero, picks the ball up on the edge of his own area and dribbles it slowly upfield to run down the clock. That’ll have given his fans a few palpitations, but clear his lines he eventually does.

9.49pm BST

90 min +2: Davies sends some speculation into the West Ham area. Cresswell guides it back to Adrian, and the clock ticks down.

9.48pm BST

90 min +1: Eriksen sends a daisycutter through a thicket of players towards the bottom left. Adrian should gather, but he can only push it out to the left. Alderweireld can’t turn it back into the danger zone, and the West Ham keeper gets away with an awful ricket!

9.47pm BST

90 min: There will be four added minutes.

9.47pm BST

89 min: Alderweireld tries to get under a long ball into the West Ham box. Ogbonna heads out for a corner on the left. The set piece is flicked on to Alli at the far post. He’s bundled over by Byram, and claims a penalty kick, but the flag’s long been up for offside at the flick-on.

9.45pm BST

88 min: Arnautovic has come on for Lanzini.

9.45pm BST

87 min: Davies makes off down the left and tries to find Alli in the box with his cross, but Ogbonna rises to clear. The tension is crackling around Wembley. It’s quiet, but that’s not a criticism: this is some tense football on display! The fear from both sets of supporters is palpable.

9.43pm BST

85 min: See 82 minutes, pretty much. West Ham have continued to play on the front foot, which is very much to their credit.

9.41pm BST

84 min: Some late drama at Stamford Bridge. Willian made it 2-0 for Chelsea after a couple of minutes of injury time, but Calvert-Lewin pulled one back for Everton 90 seconds later. But it’s not enough for the Toffees. Final score: Chelsea 2-1 Everton.

9.40pm BST

83 min: Son is replaced by Nkoudou.

9.39pm BST

82 min: A free kick for West Ham, wide on the left. The visitors load the box. Lanzini lumps the ball into the mixer. Carroll is desperate to get his nut on it, but Alderweireld beats him to it.

9.38pm BST

81 min: Another Spurs change. Eriksen arrives, taking the place of Rose.

9.37pm BST

80 min: Trippier looks to hook the free kick over the wall and into the top left. It’s miles wide of the left-hand post. He really should have worked Adrian at the very least.

9.36pm BST

79 min: Rose zips with purpose down the left, reaches the byline and pujlls back for Son, who hesitates on the edge of the area instead of shooting. West Ham clear. Spurs come straight back at them, Davies romping down the inside left, only to be pulled back by Kouyate. That’s a free kick in a very dangerous position, just to the left of the D.

9.34pm BST

77 min: Alli tries to curl one into the top right from 25 yards. Nope. West Ham replace Fernandes with Obiang.

9.33pm BST

76 min: West Ham are sitting back, clearly determined to keep what they’ve got. You can understand the impulse, though they’re inviting Spurs to get back into this game. When they were pelting upfield with purpose, the hosts didn’t know what to do. The best form of defence etc.

9.32pm BST

74 min: Spurs demonstrate that last point by nearly grinding out an equaliser. Rose dribbles in from the left, then floats a cross to Son, who can’t get a header goalwards. The ball breaks to Sissoko, racing in from the right. He blasts a wild effort miles over the bar. Chance.

9.31pm BST

73 min: You’d have got a good price on this scoreline at the break. Spurs look confused, approaching stunned. Their fans have gone quiet, which is understandable given the triple whammy West Ham have just delivered. The away fans are in party mode. Long way to go yet, though.

9.29pm BST

72 min: ... nothing. Meanwhile a livid-looking Mauricio Pochettino reacts, hooking Llorente in favour of Dembele.

9.28pm BST

71 min: Spurs finally get their gamefaces on. Son dribbles down the inside-right channel and tees up Sissoko, who sends a belter towards the top right. Adrian tips it away, and the corner leads to ...

9.27pm BST

Cresswell crosses, forcing Alderweireld to turn the ball behind for West Ham’s seventh corner of the evening, out on the left. Lanzini curls it towards the front stick. Ogbonna rises on the left-hand corner of the six-yard box, and glances a brilliant header into the right-hand side of the net, Vorm rooted to the spot. What a comeback! This came from nowhere! This is quite astonishing!

9.25pm BST

68 min: Dier, quarterbacking from deep again, nearly releases Trippier down the right with a glorious crossfield pass. But Cresswell reads play well, and eyebrows it away from danger. This game is perfectly poised.

9.24pm BST

66 min: Noble plays an adventurous pass down the left and very nearly sends Ayew speeding past a sleepy Spurs back line. But the ball goes out of play. Tottenham need to watch themselves here; West Ham have the scent of blood in their nostrils and are looking for a third goal. They look much the brighter team at the moment.

9.22pm BST

64 min: Spurs finally find another gear. Sissoko makes ground down the right and scoops a cross into the box. Alli, in the middle of a thicket of players, somehow manages to shape a powerful volley goalwards from the penalty spot. Adrian does extremely well to catch a sight of the shot in the crowded area, and stops it on the line.

9.20pm BST

62 min: Spurs don’t appear panicked yet, but they do look collectively groggy. They’re playing at half the pace of West Ham right now; the visitors are first to everything and pinging their passes around with purpose. This has suddenly been transformed into a most fascinating match.

9.19pm BST

Incredible scenes at Wembley! Lanzini slips Cresswell away down the left. Alderweireld can only half clear. The ball’s chipped back into the area down the inside-left channel. Carroll flicks it round the corner with his head, a deft touch which releases Lanzini into space to the left of the six-yard box. Lanzini flicks inside, where Ayew beats Vorm to the ball and hooks it into the right-hand portion of the net! We’re all square! And West Ham have been simply brilliant since the restart. What desire!

9.15pm BST

58 min: ... nothing much happens. But the visitors are right in this now. They’ve been snapping around Tottenham tootsies since the restart, and the home side aren’t responding particularly well to the pressure. Both sets of fans in great voice now, though, as we really do have a match on our hands here!

9.14pm BST

57 min: Game on all right! Cresswell, near the left-hand corner flag, whips a glorious ball to the near post. Vorm comes out and flaps. Ayew gets a head on it, but can’t guide it into the net. The ball deflects off the keeper and out for a corner. From which ...

9.13pm BST

Lanzini’s corner is poor, but only half cleared by Davies. Fernandes, 20 yards out on the left, fizzes a low shot through a thicket of players. Vorm gets down to parry, but can only tee up Ayew, who slams into the bottom right from a couple of yards. Game on!

9.12pm BST

55 min: Carroll dribbles down the left. Good feet for etc. He earns a corner. From which ...

9.10pm BST

53 min: Rose drifts past a couple of half-arsed West Ham challenges, making good ground down the left before cutting inside and striding towards the box. He slips a fine pass down the channel for Llorente, but the big striker has dimly wandered offside, and a great chance to put West Ham in a lot of trouble is gone.

9.09pm BST

51 min: Spurs get their foot on the ball, taking the sting out of the game. Time for a dispatch from the other match courtesy of Gerrard Catesby: “Chelsea v Everton is a joy, it really is. Everton are playing well at the moment, but most fascinating of all is their tackling – they’ve gone to ground about 15 times in the second half, earning three bookings in the process. Absolutely legendary!”

9.07pm BST

49 min: But Noble’s outburst fires West Ham up. They win a corner down the right, after a cross from the opposite wing very nearly finds Carroll in the middle. Nothing comes of the set piece, but the Hammers need something quickly, and at least they’re showing a desire to get it.

9.06pm BST

47 min: Early stresses for Son, who looks to burst down the inside left, but kicks the ground as he tries to pass Kouyate. The ball is put out for treatment. Son’s OK. Noble isn’t, though: he takes offence at the way Spurs return the ball. He goes into full Scrappy Doo mode: Davies looks like he’s trying to calm him down with a “hey come on”. He soon resorts to “oh [eff] off”. Grown men here.

9.03pm BST

We’re off again! No changes at half-time. Spurs get the ball rolling for the second half. It’s still Chelsea 1-0 Everton at Stamford Bridge, by the way, the home side leading there through Antonio Rudiger’s towering header, sent whistling into the top left from the right-hand corner of the six-yard box.

8.47pm BST

Half-time admin:

8.47pm BST

Thing is, West Ham haven’t been terrible. They’ve just not put anything together in the final third. And Spurs - even a second-string Spurs - are simply very good, even in second gear. West Ham need the next goal. More action soon!

8.46pm BST

44 min: Sissoko whips in a cross from a deep position on the left. Llorente’s nowhere near it. Rice leaves it. Adrian waves it through. It bounces out of play, inches wide of the right-hand post. The keeper had that covered, but the crowd were certainly unsure of what was going on, and oooooh accordingly.

8.45pm BST

43 min: Dier sashays his way down the middle of the park, slips the ball right for Alli, who tries to wedge a return pass into the area. Dier has kept going, but he’s never getting it.

8.43pm BST

42 min: Noble is fed by Lanzini, 25 yards from goal, down the inside-left channel. He skelps a bouncer towards the bottom left, but Vorm is behind it all the way. Cue ironic cheers from the home faithful; it’s the first serious action for the Spurs keeper all evening.

8.42pm BST

41 min: Spurs stroke it around in the dominant style for some time. Son tries a trick on the edge of the West Ham box, hoping to manufacture space to shoot, but it doesn’t quite come off.

8.40pm BST

39 min: Carroll makes a nuisance of himself to the right of the Spurs goal. He can’t quite get a shot away, but he does earn a corner. That set piece leads to another, which leads to a Spurs quick-break upfield. Alli races down the right, and he’s got Son clear in the middle, but he can’t find the pass and Fernandes finally makes a challenge to put a stop to his gallop.

8.38pm BST

They’re looking comfortable enough now! The effervescent Son bubbles down the inside-left channel, before dinking a pass forward for Alli, just inside the box. Alli takes a touch to the right, and curls one past Adrian and into the bottom right-hand corner. That took a deflection off poor Rice’s head, giving the keeper no chance.

8.37pm BST

36 min: Spurs haven’t done much in attack since the Alli header on 18 minutes. West Ham have enjoyed their fair share of possession. But the home side have looked comfortable enough.

8.35pm BST

35 min: Dier, quarterbacking to the right of the centre circle, very nearly releases Son down the middle with a spectacular curling pass. Rice reads the intention brilliantly, though, stepping in to blooter clear.

8.34pm BST

33 min: Lanzini hoicks a ball into the Spurs area from the left. Carroll isn’t really on the front foot, and Rose is able to chest the ball back to Vorm. A lame end to a promising situation, but West Ham are definitely in this game now.

8.33pm BST

31 min: Ayew spins on a sixpence to leave Dier floundering down the West Ham right. It’s a lovely bit of skill, and his raking pass down the wing to release Byram is equally as good. But the young full back has gone too early, and the offside flag goes up, ruining a very promising West Ham attack. Spurs were light at the back there, with Carroll and Cresswell nicely placed in the middle.

8.30pm BST

29 min: Son forces a corner down the right. Trippier takes. The whistle goes immediately for some common-or-garden infringement in the box. The tempo of this game has slowed a little. Not loads to report.

8.29pm BST

28 min: Rose very nearly skitters clear down the left, but once he nears the box he’s ushered back up the wing by Byram. That’s fine defending.

8.27pm BST

26 min: West Ham have dominated possession in the last few minutes. It’s a decent response after a stodgy start. Fernandes takes a stride down the inside-right channel and looks for the bottom-left corner from the best part of 30 yards. Full marks for ambition, if nothing else.

8.25pm BST

24 min: A free kick for West Ham out on the right, and a chance to load the Spurs box. Lanzini takes. It’s not aimed at anyone in particular, but Alderweireld channels his inner Lovren, fails to clear, and lets the ball bounce around in his own area, amid a forest of players. Anything could happen, and there’s panic in the Spurs ranks, but nobody in claret can get anywhere near the ball and it eventually spins through to Vorm.

8.23pm BST

22 min: Carroll does very well to control a fizzing ball on the edge of the Spurs D. He looks to shift it between his feet and send a low shot towards the bottom right, but can’t quite manufacture the opportunity. But again, that’s something to give the trailing visitors succour.

8.21pm BST

20 min: A little bit of possession for West Ham in the middle of the park. They go nowhere in particular, but they’ll be happy just to get a bit of a foothold in the game.

8.19pm BST

18 min: A long ball down the Spurs left forces Ogbonna into the concession of a corner. The ball is sent back to Trippier, deep on the left. He Beckhams a delightful deep cross to Alli, who has peeled off at the far post and rises to head alone. Alli aims for the top left with a header back across goal, but Adrian parries well. Very nearly a second for Spurs, who are purring.

8.18pm BST

17 min: Lanzini shows a clean pair of heels to Trippier down the left wing, a fine run from deep. He drifts a little inside, then slips a pass along the channel intended for Ayew. But Alderweireld gets in between man and ball, and is clumsily fouled by the striker. The first real sign of West Ham life.

8.16pm BST

15 min: Ditto West Ham, who can hardly get a sniff of the ball at the moment. Spurs are in total control of this match.

8.15pm BST

14 min: Everton aren’t quite so chipper: Antonio Rudiger has opened the scoring at Stamford Bridge after 26 minutes. Chelsea 1-0 Everton.

8.13pm BST

12 min: Spurs pin West Ham back into their final third. Son is buzzing around like the in-form fellow he is. He looks extremely lively. Llorente and Sissoko also seem fleet of foot, no doubt buoyed by their respective roles in the opening goal. Spurs are a happy team at the moment.

8.11pm BST

10 min: Cresswell and Ayew combine down the left, the latter earning a corner off Alli. Lanzini’s corner is useless, and cleared with ease. For a second, it looks as though Alli is going to romp up the other end of the pitch on his own, but Kouyate makes sure he can’t latch onto the loose ball and zip away.

8.08pm BST

8 min: Spurs have their tails up, as you’d expect after that early goal. Sissoko bombs down the right, but his hook into the middle is high and aimless and West Ham breathe again. On the touchline, Slaven Bilic is already mooching around with his hands deep in his pockets like a moody teenager.

8.07pm BST

Llorente, deep on the left, plays a ball down the wing for Son, who rips into space, drifts inside, and slips a pass towards Sissoko, bursting down the middle. Sissoko is free, opens his body, and slides a glorious finish past Adrian and into the bottom left!

8.06pm BST

5 min: Fernandes is found deep down the right, but his hook into the middle fails to find Carroll. Foyth clears. Spurs break up the other end, and ...

8.05pm BST

4 min: West Ham continue to stroke it around. Then Cresswell is nearly stripped of possession by Trippier down the West Ham left, but the Spurs man is closed down before he can launch a quick attack.

8.03pm BST

2 min: West Ham take their turn to have a touch. It’s a slow start. But even though Wembley isn’t full - hey, you can’t expect 80,000 to turn up every day - the place is really cooking.

8.02pm BST

And we’re off! Wembley a riot of sound. West Ham get the ball rolling. Spurs quickly take the ball off them and pass it around the back a bit, getting a feel for the thing. It’s a lovely ball, isn’t it? Eh?

7.59pm BST

The teams are out! Tottenham are in their famous lilywhite shirts and dark blue shorts, West Ham in their equally storied claret and blue tops and white breeks. It’s an aesthetic pleasure, a lovely classic look to the evening, if you ignore the half-empty stands. Alan Hardaker will be spinning in his grave. But there’s a fine atmosphere nonetheless; well, it is a local derby, after all, and it’s the first time these two grand old London clubs have met at the home of English football. We’ll be off in a minute!

7.53pm BST

Wembley will be bouncing pretty soon, but let’s not forget there’s a whole world outside its doors. Chelsea and Everton are playing tonight at Stamford Bridge, Danny Drinkwater making his debut for the home side; we’ll keep you up to date with that. No early goals in the 7.45pm kick-off. Meanwhile look what Drinkwater’s old team have just announced ...

7.50pm BST

Mauricio Pochettino speaks! “We are going to play Tottenham Hotspur and West Ham. We will keep our identity, the way we play. We have made some changes, but this is normal, we cannot play too much with the Champions League and the Premier League. We have a good balance, and keep the same idea. We play to win!”

7.39pm BST

Slaven Bilic speaks! “It would be good to win tonight of course. It’s a big game, it’s a derby, it’s a cup tie, we are playing for the quarter finals. It would be great for us to go through. We have put out a strong team tonight, with players who might not have been getting chances. We have three games in one week, with a very big game on Saturday, so we have to rest some players. But we also want to give some players the game they deserve, we have put out a strong team. It was obvious and clear to see that the players can’t wait for the game to start, to make up for what happened against Brighton.”

7.20pm BST

Team changes a-plenty, as is customary in the League Cup these days. [MBM hack tuts like old man] Spurs make seven changes to the side that took 12 minutes to beat Liverpool at the weekend. Out go Hugo Lloris, Jan Vertonghen, Davison Sanchez, Serge Aurier, Christian Eriksen, Harry Winks and Harry Kane, the latter having done himself a disservice while theatrically yanking down Dejan Lovren’s shorts.

In comes Michel Vorm, who wears the captain’s armband, along with Juan Foyth, Ben Davies, Danny Rose, Eric Dier, Moussa Sissoko and Fernando Llorente. It’s fair to say Spurs have quite some depth to their squad now.

7.04pm BST

Tottenham Hotspur: Vorm, Foyth, Alderweireld, Davies, Trippier, Sissoko, Dier, Alli, Rose, Llorente, Son.
Subs: Sanchez, Nkoudou, Dembele, Gazzaniga, Eriksen, Winks, Walker-Peters.

West Ham United: Adrian, Ogbonna, Rice, Kouyate, Byram, Noble, Fernandes, Cresswell, Ayew, Lanzini, Carroll.
Subs: Fonte, Arnautovic, Obiang, Hernandez, Haksabanovic, Hart, Masuaku.

2.56pm BST

... in which Tottenham Hotspur, fresh from an assured showing at Real Madrid and a spectacular shoeing of Liverpool, look to complete a fine week’s work in three competitions by reaching the quarter finals of the League Cup. Meanwhile West Ham United consider saving their under-fire manager’s bacon with a first win at Spurs since knocking them out of this very competition in December 2013.

Spurs have claimed this trophy on four occasions, the most recent in 2008 when they beat Chelsea in the final. West Ham have only two runners-up spots to their name, losing to West Bromwich Albion in 1966 and Liverpool in 1981. A quarter-final slot would do both clubs nicely; Spurs haven’t won anything since that 2008 League Cup, while the Hammers haven’t picked up any silverware since the 1980 FA Cup. With local pride also at stake, this could be tasty and a lot of wholesome fun. We kick off at 8pm. It’s on!

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Published on October 25, 2017 14:01

The Fiver | Teams packed with young talent gaining priceless experience

In today’s Fiver: Mr Roy can’t win anything with kids. Perhaps England can

Seven years ago, an experimental Liverpool team featuring 19-year-old Dani Pacheco, 18-year-old Danny Wilson, 19-year-old Nathan Eccleston, 18-year-old Jonjo Shelvey and 18-year-old Tom Ince crashed out of the Milk Cup at home to Northampton Town. At which point their experienced manager would have thrown a protective arm round his young charges, right? “These players have to accept responsibility,” raged the big boss man, 63. “I accept responsibility for changing a lot of players in the team, I did it because I honestly thought the players I put on the field were good enough to win the game and they weren’t. I am just bitterly disappointed that the team I had so much faith in did not repay that faith.” Oh flaky, deceitful, treacherous teenagers! How could you mistreat him so!

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Published on October 25, 2017 07:56

October 24, 2017

Football rumours: Ryan Giggs to manage Everton or Leicester City?

Today’s fluff is wearing a sheepskin coat and barking orders from the touchline

Yes, well, that Ronald Koeman business didn’t go exactly to plan for Everton. Still, at least the Dutchman can leave the managerial post at Goodison with his head held high, boasting a better win percentage than Mike Walker, Walter Smith, Roberto Martínez, David Moyes, last trophy winner Joe Royle, the legendary Howard Kendall during his second coming, and Thomas H McIntosh who secured a couple of titles and the FA Cup and signed Dixie Dean. Good old statistics! Well done Ronald!

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Published on October 24, 2017 00:58

October 5, 2017

Scotland 1-0 Slovakia: World Cup 2018 qualifier – as it happened

Scotland forced poor Martin Škrtel into a late own goal, keeping their World Cup qualification hopes alive on a night of high drama at Hampden.

9.52pm BST

9.37pm BST

Well, well, well. How about that, then! Scotland’s World Cup hopes are still alive, thanks once again to Chris Martin. The ten men of Slovakia defended marvellously all night. Dubravka was inspired in the Slovakian goal. But Scotland deserved their victory, having hit the woodwork twice with two fine efforts, and got a bit of luck when they so desperately needed it. Martin’s presence forced Skrtel into the decisive error, and now a win for the Scots in Slovenia on Sunday will give them second spot in Group F! Wow. Good luck trying to sleep after that drama, but nighty night everyone.

9.37pm BST

90 min +4: Bannan is booked for fannying around in the midfield. And then...

9.36pm BST

90 min +3: Pekarik flats in a cross from the right. Skrtel, desperate to atone for his error, goes in too strong and concedes a free kick. Poor Skrtel, who had to make that challenge for the goal; Martin would have scored anyway. But Scotland don’t care. The clock does its work.

9.35pm BST

90 min +2: Bannan chases down a Dubravka clearance. Griffiths tries to break down the left but fouls Pekarik. Time continues to do its thing.

9.35pm BST

90 min +1: Anya presses Hubocan back down the right. Time ticks on.

9.34pm BST

90 min: Hampden roars. A manic atmosphere. On the touchline, Gordon Strachan goes on a long dribble of celebration. Nobody’s counting any chickens though. There will be four added minutes.

9.33pm BST

Have Scotland saved themselves? They might just have! Griffiths turns cleverly down the inside-right channel and slips Anya away. Anya enters the box and fires hard towards the near post. Martin is preparing to slam home. Skrtel sticks out a leg and does the work for him! Scotland’s World Cup dream is still alive ... if they can see the next few minutes out. This isn’t over yet.

9.31pm BST

87 min: Robertson, out on the left wing, clips a clever ball inside for Bannan. A good touch and Bannan is free in the area down the inside-left channel, but he’s tired and his attempt to trap is heavy. As is the mood around Hampden. Goal kick.

9.29pm BST

86 min: Anya twists and turns down the right, and curls a devilish cross towards the near post. It’s a brilliant ball, but nobody in Rosebery pink has taken a gamble or made a run. Slovakia clear. Hampden is sinking collectively into a depressive funk.

9.27pm BST

84 min: Scotland are pushing Slovakia back. Deep inside their own half. Phillips makes a nuisance of himself in the area. Robertson tries a cross from the left. Cleared. Bannan has another go. Skrtel knocks it out for a corner. From the set piece, Bannan has a crack from 20 yards. It’s hacked clear. They’re trying everything. Nothing’s working.

9.25pm BST

82 min: And now Scotland make their last roll of the dice, Anya coming on for Tierney. Anya immediately forces Hubocan into giving away a throw down the right, but a goal kick is all that eventually results.

9.24pm BST

80 min: Scotland swap Fletcher for McArthur. Meanwhile a triple substitution by Slovakia: Nemec, Hamsik and Kucka off; Weiss, Duda and Gyomber on. They’re happy to shore things up for a draw, with Malta at home to come in their final game.

9.22pm BST

78 min: Morrison sends Robertson into the box down the left. From a tight angle, Robertson smashes a rising shot towards the top left. Dubravka parries well. Scotland are doing everything but score. This is a story told before.

9.20pm BST

77 min: “Scotland’s Law: (Hope - luck) x ability = despair.” Dr Simon McMahon there.

9.19pm BST

76 min: Martin has been causing all sorts of bother since coming on. He rises to meet a long pass into the Slovakia area, heading down for Morrison, who prepares for a free shot from 12 yards. But the ball won’t drop in time, and Skrtel gets across to block.

9.18pm BST

74 min: Oh this is outrageous! Griffiths curls a stunner towards the top right. Dubravka is beaten again ... but the ball crashes off the Slovakian woodwork for the second time! Scotland come straight back at Slovakia, a deft backheel by Martin sending Morrison clear into the area down the inside-left channel ... and is denied by a wonder block from Dubravka! Scotland did everything but score there.

9.16pm BST

73 min: Skrtel rashly clatters into the back of Martin, who was trying to hold the ball up 25 yards from goal. This is a free kick in a central position, in Griffiths Country. He lines it up. Hampden expects!

9.15pm BST

72 min: Kucka juggles the ball inside from the right and attempts to lash a spectacular one home from 25 yards. It’s wild. Scotland go up the other end, Griffiths having a dig from the edge of the box. But it’s blocked pretty much at source.

9.13pm BST

70 min: Morrison is booked for a rash clank on Pekarik as Slovakia attempt to break upfield. He doesn’t bother complaining.

9.12pm BST

69 min: Bannan and Martin combine down the middle of the park, crisp one-twos that nearly open Slovakia up. Not quite. But then the ball’s worked back to Martin, who curls a powerful effort towards the top left. It’s a glorious effort, but just that little bit too high: it crashes off the crossbar with Dubravka beaten all ends up! So unfortunate.

9.10pm BST

67 min: Bannan is slowly establishing himself as Scotland’s chief creative force. He earns a corner down the left, causes a bit of bother with a couple of searching crosses, and then slips Griffiths down the same wing, but the striker, upon cutting into the box, can’t get a decent shot away. Better from Scotland, for whom time is beginning to run out.

9.09pm BST

66 min: Hamsik is beginning to cause Scotland a lot of bother. He very nearly sets up Gregus on the edge of the Scottish box with a cheeky Le Tissier style backflick. He’s a class apart. Fortunately the resulting shot is hoofed wildly over the bar.

9.08pm BST

64 min: Fletcher is back with a white bandage wrapped around his noggin. No doubt some Uefa bureaucrat will consider that an unacceptable kit clash with Slovakia’s shirts. (A sleeve clash, though.)

9.06pm BST

63 min: Fletcher is off getting running repairs, having taken an accidental whack upside the head from Skrtel while contesting the aforementioned corner. Plenty of claret, which doesn’t go well with Scotland’s pretty pink shirt.

9.05pm BST

61 min: On comes Chris Martin, who rescued this qualifying campaign with his late winner here against Slovenia. He replaces James Forrest. Immediately, Scotland are on the attack, and Griffiths sends a swerving riser goalwards from the edge of the box. Dubravka does very well to punch up and out for a corner, from which nothing comes.

9.03pm BST

60 min: Another Slovakian attack, prompted by Hamsik, results in Gregus having a pop from just inside the area on the right. Gordon does very well to parry clear.

9.02pm BST

59 min: Lobotka dribbles in from the left and lays off for Hamsik, who converts in the rugby style from 25 yards. That was a wild shot. Slovakia are beginning to bare their teeth, though.

9.01pm BST

57 min: A lot of space for Hamsik in the middle of the park. He drives forward and slips the ball wide left for the increasingly dangerous Lobotka, who drops a shoulder to glide inside and pearls a low shot straight at Gordon from the edge of the box. The keeper gathers. That was a real chance for Lobotka, though, with not much in the way of Scottish pressing going on. Gordon should have been made to work harder at least.

8.59pm BST

56 min: Bannan’s free kick falls to Forrest, 25 yards out. Forrest attempts to swipe one into the top left. No. Robertson comes back on with a heavily strapped arm. Scotland won’t want to lose him. Liverpool fans not totally enamoured with Alberto Moreno won’t want to lose him.

8.58pm BST

54 min: Kucka comes through the back of Robertson, out on the Scotland left. He’s already been booked, remember. Getting a chunk of the ball probably saved him. It’s a free kick, though. It’s not taken yet: Robertson has hurt his right wrist and is getting treatment.

8.56pm BST

53 min: Another crossfield ball from Tierney on the right. This time it’s low and threaded towards Robertson on the other wing. Not quite, and Pekarik mops up. But a good idea nonetheless.

8.55pm BST

51 min: Tierney, from a deep position on the right, floats a crossfield pass to Griffiths, ten yards out. Griffiths tries to power a header back into the top right, but can’t generate the power. He looks frustrated. He’s looked frustrated for most of the evening. But as the England game proved, there’s plenty to be said for patience.

8.53pm BST

50 min: Lobotka glides past Tierney as though the young Scotland defender wasn’t there. He enters the area and reaches the byline to the left of goal. Berra comes across to block and Gordon gathers. The Hampden faithful sound nervous. Scotland go up the other end, Bannan curling into the box from the left. Phillips contorts his body mid-air and attempts to hook a volley into the top left, but it’s no good.

8.51pm BST

48 min: Bannan sends Robertson away on a scamper after the ball down the left, but the Liverpool full-back is never getting to it. Pekarik ushers the ball out for a goal kick. It’s been an underwhelming start to the half by Scotland.

8.50pm BST

47 min: The visitors are quickly back into Domination Mode. Kucka and Pekarik clip the ball in pretty triangles along the right and earn a corner. Hamsik takes, but it’s eyebrowed away from danger by Mulgrew. Hampden responds with a chorus of Flower of Scotland, in the hope of coaxing their team out of the dressing room, where they still reside.

8.48pm BST

And we’re off again! Scotland get the ball rolling for the second half. No changes, though of course Slovakia are down to ten men after the sending off of Robert Mak.

8.34pm BST

Half-time reading: Ladies and gentlemen, please put your hands together for the stars of the 2030 centenary World Cup!

8.32pm BST

Bannan works a little space in the left of the Slovakia box. He shoots from a tight angle. Skrtel deflects out for a corner, from which Tierney attempts to score with a daisycutter from 35 yards. Nope! And that’s that. Scotland have 45 minutes plus stoppages to find a goal against ten men, and keep their World Cup qualification dreams alive.

8.31pm BST

45 min: Robertson makes another determined run down the left. There’s nobody making a run to meet his low cross. Slovakia clear. There will be one added minute.

8.29pm BST

43 min: Bannan drops deep and tries to quarterback a move down the left wing, but his pass doesn’t quite come off. Both teams have shown great ambition in attack; nothing’s quite come off yet.

8.28pm BST

41 min: Kucka sashays in from the left and nearly sets up Hamsik on the edge of the Scotland box. A fine run by Kucka, with Scotland on the back foot and Hampden munching away on the fingernails. This match might not be a technical or artistic triumph, but it is beautifully poised and a lot of fun as a result. I use the word “fun” in its loosest sense, obviously, with all that’s at stake.

8.26pm BST

40 min: Morrison holds the ball up on the right wing, waiting for Tierney to tear past him on the overlap. He eventually slides a pass forward, allowing the Celtic full back to whipcrack a first-time low cross into the area. The ball flies inches behind Griffiths, who throws his arms in the air at the end of a slightly mistimed run.

8.25pm BST

38 min: The crowd are getting a wee bit testy, the ten men of Slovakia enjoying the lion’s share in the midfield. Forrest tries to ease their worries with a couple of tricks out on the right. For a second, it looks as though an opening will present itself, but a third trick followed by some hesitation allows Slovakia to regroup and once again they’ve got the ball in the centre circle, the crowd subdued.

8.22pm BST

36 min: Forrest drives at Slovakia, and slips a ball down the inside-right channel for Griffiths to run onto. To the right of the D, Griffiths curls a glorious effort towards the bottom left; the excellent Dubravka makes another fine save at full stretch. Lines are cleared. Griffiths is a study in frustration, wondering how the hell the keeper kept that one out!

8.21pm BST

35 min: A corner for Scotland down the right. Once again Griffiths disappoints with his delivery at a set piece. Hey, those efforts against England have stored up a lot of moral credit. Anyway, that’s not much cop in an attacking sense, but Scotland are happy to be up the other end after a difficult couple of minutes.

8.20pm BST

34 min: Lobotka embarks on a quick dribble down the middle of the park, exchanges crisp passes with Nemec, and nearly gets to the return, six yards out. Gordon smothers. Then Slovakia come again, Hamsik’s shot from the edge of the box blocked by Fletcher, Nemec caught offside as the ball squirts to his feet eight yards from goal. The visitors are suddenly looking very dangerous, ten men or no.

8.18pm BST

32 min: Now Bannan has a go at swinging one in from the left. There’s nobody in the middle, though, and Hubocan is able to calmly chest the ball down so his keeper Dubravka can gather.

8.16pm BST

31 min: Now it’s Scotland’s turn to stroke it around a bit. It’s shifted from Tierney on the right to Robertson on the left. Robertson hoicks another of his dangerous balls into the area. Skrtel does very well to twist and smash the ball clear with Griffiths lurking.

8.15pm BST

29 min: Slovakia might be a man light, but they’re dominating possession right now. Kucka nearly breaks clear down the right, after a long period of patient possession in the middle of the park. Robertson and Berra just about deal with the situation.

8.13pm BST

27 min: Kucka tries to beat Gordon from the halfway line. Nope. Then Griffiths swings an overhit free kick into the Slovakia box from the right. Dubravka plucks it from the sky easily. The atmosphere is febrile. Both teams are playing on the edge right now.

8.12pm BST

25 min: Mak takes a while to go, Rattin style, and engages the fourth official in a philosophical back-and-forth on the touchline. All good knockabout fun.

8.11pm BST

23 min: Mak goes racing into the Scotland box, hopeful of nicking the ball past the out-rushing Gordon. The keeper can’t get to it. Mak goes round Gordon on the left, and falls to the floor. He’s not been touched, and the ref shows Mak a second yellow! Mak is livid, but that was a preposterous dive. Hear Hampden roar!

8.08pm BST

21 min: Morrison brings down Hamsik, 35 yards from the Scottish goal. Kucka isn’t particularly pleased about the placement, or something, and is booked for protesting. Hamsik then picks up a yellow for arguing about that. This is preposterous. The free kick comes to nothing, as well. What a farce.

8.06pm BST

19 min: Scotland have another penalty shout, though this one’s a bit ambitious, Forrest’s right-wing cross coming off Hubocan’s shoulder and going out for a corner. Hubocan was leaning into the ball a bit, but they’re never getting that. The resulting corner’s half cleared, but Forrest swings a deep cross in from the right. Berra rises and sends a fine header down and up towards the top left. It’s heading in, but Dubravka makes like a salmon and fingertips the ball away from danger. What an effort, and an even better save!

8.04pm BST

18 min: Bannan snaps into a brilliant midfield tackle, stealing the ball off Hamsik and sending Scotland on the attack. Mak hacks down Forrest on the Scottish right, and is booked for his trouble. Mak will miss Slovakia’s final game of the group at home to Malta. Griffiths takes the free kick, but the delivery’s not up to much and Slovakia clear.

8.02pm BST

16 min: ... which comes to nothing.

8.01pm BST

15 min: Robertson looks Scotland’s most potent attacking threat in these early stages, bursting with purpose and vibrancy along that left wing from his full-back position. He combines well with Phillips and earns a corner ...

8.00pm BST

13 min: Slovakia enjoy a little foot-on-ball possession in the midfield, but go nowhere in particular. Hamsik threatens to burst down the right, but Robertson clears his lines with a cultured hoof. The first signs, though, that the visitors are trying to dictate the tempo and dominate possession. They haven’t managed it yet.

7.57pm BST

11 min: Hampden has collectively made a decision about that non-penalty shout, and they’re making sure the referee knows about it. Some good old-fashioned pantomime booing and whistling. Lovely to hear. All adds to a cracking cup-tie atmosphere.

7.56pm BST

9 min: Scotland could easily have had a penalty here. Tierney looks to break into the box down the inside-right channel. He’s barged unceremoniously to the floor by Mak, putting a lot of shoulder into it. Was it a fair-and-square challenge? One of those you could make for-and-against cases for. It would have been soft. It was borderline. But you’ve seen them given.

7.54pm BST

8 min: Robertson whips a glorious dipping ball into the Slovakia box from a very deep position on the left. It’s dropping towards Griffiths, level with the left-hand post, six yards out. Slovakia’s defence hasn’t a clue how to deal with that delivery. But Griffiths can’t connect with an extended leg. Dubravka gathers.

7.52pm BST

6 min: Bannan zips down the left and floats a cross into the Slovakia box. Skrtel heads clear under pressure from Phillips. The nervous tension continues to crackle around Hampden, and neither team looks ultra confident when on the back foot.

7.51pm BST

4 min: Slovakia will be feeling the heat too, of course. Skrtel plays a loose backpass to Dubravka, who is very nearly closed down by a buzzing Griffiths. Then Durica shanks a simple pass straight out of play. That’ll give the Scots encouragement.

7.49pm BST

3 min: And now the first corner of the game, Mak earning it for the visitors down the left. It’s hit long towards Nemec, but way too long. Hampden, fearful of the nightmare start, breathes again.

7.49pm BST

2 min: Hamsik briefly threatens to tear away from Mulgrew, down the middle. He’s turning on the jets. But can’t get control of the ball. Hampden already betrays a little tension, a sharp intake of breath as Slovakia go on the front foot for a second.

7.47pm BST

And we’re off! The visitors get the ball rolling, and lose it in short order. Gordon launches long, and Griffiths earns a throw down the left. A chance for a few of the Scots to get a first touch of the ball. Pass, pass, pass. The nerves will be jangling.

7.45pm BST

The teams are out! A rare old atmosphere at Hampden. Scotland are in their change strip, for some unfathomable reason. Still, it’s a striking kit, they’re pretty in 5th Earl of Rosebery pink. Slovakia meanwhile are in their first-choice white, a colour which you’ll notice doesn’t clash with blue. Oh, it’s a sleeve clash apparently; for goodness sake! Both anthems are wonderfully rousing, enjoyed and respected in the manner they should be. The lone piper reverberates around a packed Hampden; neck-hair-bothering stuff. What an atmosphere! What a roar! We’ll be off in a minute!

7.38pm BST

Pre-match optimism: “WGS has gone for the exact line-up I expected,” begins Andy Franks. “Hoped he wouldn’t. But with about 60 mins to go, expect to see both McGinn and McGregor to come in. Both can score goals. My prediction after 60 mins? Scotland 0 Slovakia 1. End of game: Scotland 2 Slovakia 1.” Here’s hoping you’re spot on. We’d take that, right? But for those of you more comfortable with a distinctly old-school brand of Caledonian bright-side thinking, here’s Simon McMahon: “Ever since Scotland decided to open the Pandora’s Box that is international football 145 years ago next month, all that has remained is hope. Which is why I’ll feel much better at full time, when I can safely luxuriate in the despair.” Enjoy, my friends, enjoy!

7.37pm BST

Gordon Strachan speaks! “We’re excited, anxious, we want to start the game, enjoy it, and hopefully send people away home happy. Darren Fletcher has been the captain for a while, and has been playing regularly with Stoke. He gives us a bit of height, presence and experience. James Morrison has always been a good player for us, and never lets us down. Barry Bannan, since the season started, has been the best midfield player in the Championship. And on a big pitch, when it’s important we keep the ball, he’s one of the best we’ve got. If the fans get nervous, we’ve got to stay calm. They’re strong, they know what they’re doing, really experienced.”

7.24pm BST

Slovakia are, of course, chasing the play-off spot themselves. They’re a point and two places ahead of Scotland in the Group F table, and gave Strachan’s side a hard clip round the lug in Trnava a year ago. Slovakia won that one 3-0, two goals courtesy of Robert Mak, the other by Adam Nemec. So they’re heading into this return with confidence brimming, despite that recent reverse in England. Here’s former Rangers star Vladimir Weiss: “This is going to be a totally different game, we know they are very strong at home. We don’t expect an easy game. But hopefully the result will be similar for us. We have had some great results, especially the home game against Slovenia, and we were a bit unlucky against England. But everything is in our hands, and hopefully we will qualify.”

6.50pm BST

Gordon Strachan makes three changes to the team that beat Malta 2-0 in September, all in the midfield. Scott Brown and Stuart Armstrong are out through injury, so Darren Fletcher and James Morrison return, alongside Barry Bannan who replaces the benched James McArthur. Some representative admin: Fletcher will be wearing the absent Brown’s armband, while Craig Gordon wins his 50th cap.

Slovakia boss Ján Kozák meanwhile makes two changes to the team that went down 2-1 at Wembley a month ago. Ján Greguš and Juraj Kucka take the places of Vladimír Weiss and Milan Škriniar. The former Liverpool defender Martin Škrtel, whose endearing Anfield antics don’t seem so far out these days, captains the side, with Marek Hamšík earning his 100th cap.

6.45pm BST

Scotland: Gordon, Berra, Mulgrew, Robertson, Tierney, Morrison, Darren Fletcher, Bannan, Forrest, Griffiths, Phillips.
Subs: Allan McGregor, Anya, McGinn, Snodgrass, McArthur, Steven Fletcher, Hanley, Martin, Fraser, Cooper, Callum McGregor, Archer.

Slovakia: Dubravka, Pekarik, Skrtel, Durica, Hubocan, Kucka, Gregus, Lobotka, Mak, Hamsik, Nemec.
Subs: Kozacik, Gyomber, Weiss, Duda, Mihalik, Rusnak, Hrosovsky, Mazan, Sabo, Stetina, Polacek.

10.51am BST

... where Scotland must beat Slovakia tonight if they’re to maintain any chance of making the play-offs for the 2018 World Cup in Russia. They’ll be without two influential figures in Scott Brown and Stuart Armstrong; by comparison, their opponents are able to call on the previously poorly Marek Hamšík. Nevertheless, here comes Hope, jauntily heaving into view like Bod. Oh help.

Scotland historically have a complex relationship with their dreams and desires, so this could be a rocky ride, with no guarantee of a happy ending. But we knew what we were signing up for years and years ago, it’s too late now. Buckle in, and fingers crossed. It could be exhilarating, heartbreaking or bittersweet. Perhaps all three. It’s on!

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Published on October 05, 2017 13:41

The Fiver | Wrestling with the abstract concept of hope, which nearly always wins

In today’s Fiver: England, Scotland, Norn Iron 1-0 and Southport going global

A win for England against Slovenia on Thursday night will guarant … actually, you know what, we really cannot be bothered any more. Let’s shelve the celebratory pretence, we all know how it’s going to pan out. They’ll qualify for the 2018 World Cup in Russia one way or another, almost certainly stifling a yawn, Harry Kane will spend the next seven months breaking the combined career goalscoring records of Lionel Messi, Gerd Müller and Pelé before one of his metatarsals turns to powder, the team will subsequently fail to progress from a group containing Switzerland, Iran and Basingstoke Town, and Mr Roy will seize the opportunity to retrospectively argue that the Iceland result wasn’t so bad when you look at it now, I didn’t have time to implement the methods that have translated from Halmstads to Malmo to Orebro to Neuchatel Xamax, you don’t get the opportunity to sail up the Seine every day, and while we’re on the subject the reason Palace didn’t do a goal all season was the fault of Frank de Boer, Attilio Lombardo, Malcolm Allison and that winger Pards signed from Wolves.

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Published on October 05, 2017 08:13

October 4, 2017

A consortium of Troopz, three old Etonians and the guy from the Pengest Munch | The Fiver

In today’s Fiver: Cats in a bag Stan Kroenke and Alisher Usmanov, pizza delivery boy Cesc Fàbregas and some more pre-Fiver hype kids

Ask any level-headed Arsenal fan who they’d like to run their club, and the answer will always be the same: a consortium made up of Troopz, three Old Etonians (preferably at least one with a double-barrelled surname containing no capital letters), the guy who interviews Troopz, the guy from the Pengest Munch, and Piers Morgan so he can do the tweets, please! But you can’t always get what you want, and for years now Arsenal have instead been co-owned by US tycoon Stan Kroenke and Russian billionaire Alisher Usmanov. Like cats in a bag, those two, and as a result it’s been a right old shambles: since they took over in 2007, Arsenal have finished third, fourth, third, fourth, third, fourth, fourth, third, second and fifth, and won three FA Cups. Empathetic fellow football fans in Croydon, Wimbledon and Leyton are passing around the plate as we speak.

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Published on October 04, 2017 08:07

Football transfer rumours: Real Madrid to buy Tottenham's Harry Kane for €200m?

Today’s tittle-tattle is all set for winter

Ask any West Bromwich Albion fan old enough to remember Laurie Cunningham, or a Liverpool supporter able to rationally discuss the career of Michael Owen without flying spectacularly off the handle: the problem with having a world-class talent in your ranks is that Real Madrid will one day come a-knocking. Yes, Tottenham fans, it’s happening to you again. Harry Kane for 200 million euro. Gareth Bale for €91m suddenly seems like a steal.

Tottenham will ease the pain by bringing in Barcelona midfielder André Gomes on loan. Yes, well, you do what you can.

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Published on October 04, 2017 00:39

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