Christine Valters Paintner's Blog, page 113

Canine Horarium: Praying the Hours with My Dog ~ A love note from your online abbess

Dearest monks, artists, and pilgrims,

During July we are sharing some reflections from the Abbey Archives (and in August we will be taking a break from our daily and weekly newsletters for a summer sabbatical):

As a Benedictine oblate, I am committed to living as a monk in the world. For me, this means living contemplatively, savoring experience rather than rushing through it to the next thing, focusing on simplicity rather than consumption, and cultivating spaciousness rather than filling my days with endless activities.

The natural world is my monk's cell, the place where I go to receive wisdom and guidance. My dogs have always been key sources of wisdom in my daily life; they have served as my spiritual directors inviting me into a much greater wisdom. The last dog who companioned us before our move to Europe was Winter. Her story was heartbreaking: She was abandoned on a farm and left to freeze to death. She survived but her puppies didn't. Welcoming her into our lives brought us profound and unexpected gifts.

Something about the rhythms of a dog are grounding for me, especially as someone who is self-employed and often works several hours of the day at home. In monastic tradition, praying the Hours is a fundamental part of moving through the day with presence and awareness. I offer you here the Horarium Winter leads me through.

Vigils: Night –The Hour of Sleeping, Dreaming, and Cherishing

My husband and I are asleep in our bed, Winter curled up in her own bed in the corner. Occasionally I awaken to remember a fragment of a dream and write it down. Sometimes in the dark quiet I hear Winter's legs twitching or muffled barking. I wonder if she is dreaming of chasing squirrels. Or I hear her and my husband breathing deeply and I cherish the presence of these two precious ones in my life.

Lauds: Dawn—The Hour of Awakening

I am not a morning person. This is the hour when I sometimes wish I could sleep in, but Winter will have none of that. She is ready to go out first thing and as the sun rises earlier and earlier in the summer months she calls me out of bed earlier as well. Some mornings I am gifted with a glimpse of the full moon setting or the glorious swathe of pink across the sky. In these moments I even find myself grateful to awaken with the dawn. I prepare my heart to receive the day ahead.

Terce: Morning—The Hour of Stretching

We return from our morning walk to a time of prayer, centering, and movement. This is my time to sink into myself and be present to the spirit moving through stillness. I have a regular morning practice of yoga, dance, and journaling to open up space within my body and soul and root myself in my Source before I move into the work of the day. Winter is a quiet witness to this practice. She lies on the couch holding the space with her presence.

Sext: Noon—The Hour of Recommitment

If I have a day of writing ahead, I usually begin around 9 or 10. Winter settles into the chair next to my desk and sleeps as I dive deep into the blank page before me, listening for the way the words want to unfurl before me. Midday calls me to recommit to this work, to eat and nourish myself for the rest of the day, and to give thanks for being able to offer my gifts in meaningful ways.

None: Midafternoon—The Hour of Play

I can get lost in hours of writing, forgetting to eat or move. Wise Winter begins to get restless in mid afternoon. She begins to paw at me, inviting me to walk and play. We take our long daily stroll up to a nearby park where she runs exuberantly and plays with other dogs who have similarly called their owners out into the world. Each time I find my heart broken wide open by her delight. Winter then demonstrates "rolling in the grass meditation" with no forethought to getting muddy or wet. Sometimes I follow suit and am rewarded by a deep sense of being re-energized by the earth.

Vespers: Evening—The Hour of Storytelling

As evening arrives and my husband returns home from his workday, we often go to the video store together to seek out stories to nourish us as the day moves toward its close. Winter is welcome into the shop and given dog cookies each time. We all return home and snuggle together on the couch and reconnect as a family and as a pack.

Compline: Night—The Hour of Mystery

As dark descends once again we are called back into releasing our hold on the day and what we had hoped to get done. Night invites us to embrace mystery. Winter goes out one last time before bed and we all curl up in our respective beds, welcoming in the world of dreams.

Those of you who have been following the Abbey since the time we lived in Seattle with Winter as our companion will be glad to know she continues to thrive in a wonderful home where she has been much loved and is able to romp and play all day with other dogs, which is one of her great joys.

If you must abide by an external schedule, consider taking a day or two of retreat when your only goal is to listen for when you need to sleep, eat, walk, and simply be. Consider bringing along a wise animal companion and let her or him be your spiritual director for these days. What happens when you submit to instinctual wisdom?

My favorite way to go on retreat is to rent a small cottage by the sea and bring my dog as my guide, along with some food to prepare simple meals when I get hungry. No meal schedules or anywhere to be at any particular time. I can just be present to the Hours as they unfold before me. Other necessities are my art supplies and journal for expression, and my yoga mat for meditation. What essentials do you need for a time of retreat?

With great and growing love,

Christine

Christine Valters Paintner, PhD, REACE

Photo © Christine Valters Paintner

Earth Monastery Project ~ Sandi Howell

I am pleased to share another beautiful project created with the Earth Monastery Grant. Read on for Sandi Howell's art project, Intersections – Co-creation, Co-habitation.

“Our task must be to free ourselves by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature and its beauty.” ~ Albert Einstein

Background – Project Goal and Objectives

The goal of this project was to raise awareness in a viewer/reader of the intersection of humans and nature, and about a potential of collaboration versus dominance.  As the artist, I wanted to create a moment by using visual art and stories to have viewers/readers come to a place of lament and subsequently to new ways of seeing nature’s place amongst us.   It was intended to open people up to thoughts of a place of balance and harmony, a place of cohabitation between humans and nature.  I see this peaceful coexistence as a place for the care of the soul.  In this way, earth is monastery.

The process of engagement was triggered by a visual – in this case photographs and the availability of the story behind the photograph.  It was meant to trigger thinking which was prompted also by open-ended questions.  In turn, individuals were invited to comment or add to the dialogue in some way.    It is an intersection and co-creation between the artist and viewer – a play within the play.

There is an energy in the process which creates momentum, resulting in a living document.  It is living in that as the photographs, stories and questions are made available internationally, more stories arrive and the collection grows.  For example, the project was tweeted out and I received a reply on it from England.  The reply said that the writer had gone to someone’s front door and there was a sign posted on the mailbox which said, “Do not open the mailbox or disturb it in any way as a bird has nested inside and is sitting on its eggs.”

Launch Point – Crescent Fort Rouge United Church (CFRUC) – Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada

The main launch point for this project was at a large, core, downtown mainstream church and by extension with the larger community it serves.  The Intersection topic was the theme of CFRUC’s five-week Artfest 2016.  This actually turned into an eleven-week festival!

Intersections – Co-creation, Co-habitation, contributed to the overall outcomes of what the church, and the artist, were trying to achieve.  It had a significant presence in the art show itself and attracted a lot of attention.  The photographs and stories were intensely studied by many. 

What Was Learned?

Several key things were learned.  First was that there was much less of a lament than I had anticipated.  There was actually great joy about nature and co-existence.  In fact, the extent of deliberate and mindful co-habitation within the city was simply astonishing.

I feel in some way going forward that this reverence needs to be celebrated and communicated.  It feels like a foundation which can be built upon to create larger impacts to the well-being of the planet overall.

Second, for certain, there is a general feeling that nature in many ways is nourishing and fills the soul.  This feeling is held by people I would not have previously identified as nature enthusiasts.  They are not travelling out of the city to experience nature in depth.  Rather, they enjoy it daily around them in a myriad of ways, often deliberately reaching for and creating experiences.

Third is that it is easy to create moments of awe about nature both through visuals and also writing.  The audience is and will be readily at hand.

Fourth is that creating momentum around this topic is achievable.  Thus, going forward, through deliberate advertisement about the availability of the visuals and the stories, continued activity is predicted.

What’s Next?

The original photographs, stories and questions for reflection will be subsequently offered to churches for use with study groups, Sunday schools, youth groups, daycares or to schools.  It can also be used within the common lectionary during the season of creation, utilizing some of the present day alternate meanings to ‘Creation Time’.

In September at the first fall presbytery meeting of the United Church, the results of this project will be offered to the church broadly at no cost.

The results of this project are posted on the artist’s website as an additional page for others to access easily.  www.sandihowell.com  This will be added to on an ongoing basis.  What is posted now feels like the beginning of a fairly organic collection.

 

Earth Monastery Project ~ Salal + Cedar Curriculum Boxes

I am pleased to share one of the beautiful projects created with the Earth Monastery Grant. Read on to learn how Salal + Cedar piloted a program to bring scripture and the elements of the natural word to nurture children's sense of wonder in God's creation.

What did they do?

Salal + Cedar Watershed Discipleship Ministry used their Earth Monastery grant to produce and pilot three curriculum boxes—portable, self-contained lesson material–for multi-age groups. The project was designed to bring together scripture and elements of the natural world from the lower Fraser watershed to nurture children’s sense of wonder in God’s creation. The pedagogy draws from three quite different sources Messy Church, Godly Play, and Forest Schools. The format for each lesson includes a scripturally based story and actions lead by an adult, a series of open-ended wonder questions and several hands-on learning and explorations stations. The three boxes explore:

Water
All the Birds of the Air
Trees of Field and Forest

Most of the work was undertaken by Salal + Cedar’s priest in charge, Laurel Dykstra (LD)and community member Cameron Gutjahr (CG).

Who was served?

Between Jan 1 and June 30, approximately 60 children at different 5 churches in Lower Mainland British Columbia took part in a biblically-based environmental learning experience using the curriculum boxes. Five adults contributed to and practiced with the written and hands-on materials and are able to deliver the curriculum in various settings.

They now have 3 curriculum boxes that are available for use when Salal + Cedar visits different churches on Sunday Mornings, for Messy Church programs, and when they help to animate retreats, church picnics and other events.

The print material is available for free download from the Salal + Cedar website.

Samples of the work:

Water

“This is the water of creation, the dangerous water of the flood, the water the people through into freedom, the water Jesus was baptized in, the water you were or will be baptized in, and so much more.”

Water is all around us, in our bodies, in plants, animals, rivers, lakes, oceans, underground and even in the air. Water moves, it flows in streams, rivers, oceans. Water evaporates (lift hand) becomes clouds, falls back to earth as rain (make a circle with your arm indicating water cycle).

Sample Wonder questions:

I wonder what it means to be thirsty for God?
I wonder what you use water for?
I wonder how we can take care of water?
I wonder what people who don’t have clean water do?

All the Birds of the Air

A long, long, long time ago the prophet Ezekiel told a story. Ezekiel said this is what God’s people are like:

I will go to the lofty top of a cedar tree

And take a tender young twig from the very top

I will plan that twig high on a mountain

And it will grow tall, and sprout branches and become a giant cedar tree

And every kind of bird will come and live in it

And all the winged creatures will build their nests in the shade of its branches.

Sample Wonder Questions:

I wonder what kind of birds you know?
What kind of bird would you be?
I wonder how the birds felt when they found a safe place for their nests?

Trees

Did you know there are trees at the beginning and middle, and the end of the bible?

In the very beginning of creation God said, ‘Let the earth put forth vegetation: plants yielding seed, and fruit trres of every kind on earth that bear fruit with the in it.’ And it was so. The earth brought forth vegetation: plants yielding seed of every kind, and trees of every kind bearing fruit with the seed in it. And God saw that it was good.

Sample Wonder Questions:

I wonder if you the names of some trees that grow in the forest?
I wonder what kinds of plants are used for medicine?
I wonder how a seed feels when it goes into the dark, dark, earth to grow a tree? Is is scared? Excited?
I wonder if there is a tree that you love best?

What did they learn/next steps?

The materials as written proved very popular with the different host communities. Greatest success was with a Salal + Cedar member taking the key leadership/storyteller role and hosts supporting. For facilitators who have thought about faith and the environment the materials were easy to follow and adapt. For those new to the ideas or uncomfortable with adlib some more detail could help.

In the future they will refine the instructions so that the material is more universally accessible and expect to create more boxes as their ministry grows.

Click here to visit their ministry site and download the printed material>>

Continuing Education Program and 2017 Ireland Pilgrimages | *Updates*

Awakening the Creative Spirit: Experiential Education for Spiritual Directors in the Expressive Arts

November 13-18, 2016 with Kayce Stevens Hughlett, MA & Betsey Beckman MM in the Pacific Northwest

Space has opened up in this program. Click here for more details>>

May 2-7, 2017 with Christine Valters Paintner, PhD & Betsey Beckman, MM in Perth Scotland

This program is starting to fill already! Click here for more details>>

This five-day intensive immerses you in an experience of the bringing the transformative power of the expressive arts to spiritual settings. Join a small group of kindred souls to dive deep together in exploration and discovery and come away with new skills for your soul care practice.

 

We are delighted that our pilgrimages to Ireland for 2017 are filling up and so want to give you an update:

Monk in the World: Pilgrimage to the Sacred Edge of Ireland

August 29-September 6, 2016 – ONE SPACE LEFT

Details and registration here>>

Soul's Slow Ripening: Celtic Wisdom for Discernment

March 28-April 5, 2016 | September 19-27, 2016

Just a few spaces left!

Details and registration here>>

Writing on the Wild Edges: A Creative Pilgrimage & Retreat in Ireland

April 21-27, 2016 | October 5-11, 2017

Just a few spaces left!

Details and registration here>>

Listen to our Pilgrimage Preview Call:

http://abbeyofthearts.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2014/03/ARCHIVE-Pilgrimage-Preview-Call-EDITED.mp3

Or email us with any questions!

Visual Meditation:

A little video I made with some images of places you will be visiting (and song by Noriana Kennedy, a Galway musician):

Monk in the World Guest Post: Liz Hill

I am delighted to share another beautiful submission for the Monk in the World guest post series from the community. Read on for Liz Hill's reflection titled Going On Faith.

Not long ago I ran into a woman who had taken my class on storytelling just before she left on an extended overseas trip.

“You were right,” she told me. “Faith is a good airline.”

I nodded and smiled, but I’m pretty sure she could tell I had no idea what she was referring to. The next day she refreshed my memory via email. She outlined the many remarkable, transformative things that had happened to her on her overseas journey. And she reminded me that before she left, when she had told me she was “going on faith,” I had responded by saying that faith was a pretty good airline, one that had carried many people to interesting places.

I hadn’t the slightest memory of this, though I was able to find the email where I had, indeed, written it. In my role as spiritual director and soul friend, this kind of thing happens often. Certainly I am old enough to blame an aging brain for my failure to remember who said what to whom, or when. But that is not the entire excuse, nor is it the truest. I’ve come to realize that much of what I say to my soul friends doesn’t originate in my brain; that although the words may come through my lips, their source is more mysterious.

Who do I consider soul friends? Not only my spiritual directees, but anyone who is willing to be open and to be opened, who is asking important questions of their life, and who is willing to cross the thresholds that lead to (a few) answers and (usually even more) questions. In conversations with these people there is always a third party present; God, spirit, universe, instinct, the name does not matter. Because of that presence in our conversations, I have learned that I don’t need to remember every word that’s spoken. In fact I have learned that when I am able to release my own hold on the words and ideas we share, that act of stepping out of the way helps my soul friend to begin their own work of freeing, releasing, and transforming.

This has not been an easy lesson for me. I am a planner by nature. I’m a list maker, a note taker. I relish the closure of checking the box on a to-do list. When I first began training in spiritual direction I brought to the practice my usual way of being, and took great care to prepare for my sessions in what I thought were practical ways. I reviewed the notes from my last session with the person, I prepared a list of questions, I brought readings or poems to the session.

All of these preparations were helpful in some ways, but they were also based on my expectations of what could or should happen. I quickly learned that no amount of planning will redirect God from His intended destination, or send a person where they weren’t meant to go. Sometimes my preparation was useful. But more often, a space would open in the conversation that had nothing to do with any of the plans, and if only I could leave it alone and resist the temptation to fill it with my own words, something new and unexpected would flow in.

The same lesson applies when I lead writing workshops. I always lay out my classes carefully. I plan what I will say. I practice saying it, even time it with a stopwatch to be sure what I’ve planned fills the allotted time without going over. Yet in every class I lead, there comes a moment when the plan is abandoned. A student has more knowledge of the topic than I do, and her sharing opens a new way for all the students, myself included.  A student has a need so pressing that everyone knows, on instinct, that there is more to be learned by giving him our attention than listening to me prattle. Someone writes something so gorgeous and brilliant that time stops and there is nothing to do but be silent and breathe the words.

No amount of planning can engineer such moments. They can only be savored and accepted without credit to ego or mind. Sure, I want to believe my carefully crafted workshops brought these words to light. I want to believe that every time I meet with a soul friend, I know just what they need and my words of advice tumble forth like so many sparkling gems. But in truth, I generally stumble and bumble along, hoping to get something, anything, right. The moments where I am of most use to God, to myself, and to others are the ones where I can forget myself and simply become a channel, a conduit, a transceiver, rather than working so hard to find the perfect thing to say.

In other words, I have to go on faith.

Welcome aboard. Though the schedule is hard to predict, I’ve heard it’s a pretty good airline."

Liz Hill is a writer and spiritual director who has led workshops in creative process, discovering authentic voice, and un-journaling. She is co-author (with Ruthie Rosauer) of Singing Meditation: Together in Song and Silence, and co-director of a literary arts non-profit in Youngstown, Ohio. See www.lizhill.net.

 

 

Savoring Summer’s Sweet Slowness ~ A love note from your online abbess

Dearest monks, artists, and pilgrims,

During July we are sharing some reflections from the Abbey Archives (and in August we will be taking a break from our daily and weekly newsletters for a summer sabbatical):

"The summer night is like a perfection of thought."

—Wallace Stevens

"What is summer's sweetness / but an invitation to respond?"

—Lynn Ungar

John and I are blessed to have a lot of control over the rhythms of our year, and summer is a time when we step back from the intensity of work and allow more time for dreaming and incubation for the year to come. After working very hard the rest of the year, summer opens up like a lavish gift before us. I am finding these summer days I have been resistant even to the writing that I love so much, craving more silence and rest. So as I sit down to write this reflection I am drawn toward simplicity, fewer words, more savoring of the spaces between them.

Being a monk in the world means for me to live slowly in a fast-paced culture, to treasure the gift of "being" in a world that says my value comes from "doing," to linger over life's moments and recognize that what I seek most deeply is already here waiting to be revealed.

Summer calls me to relish the gifts of slowness, attention, and wonder. The season immerses me in the sacramental imagination—the recognition that everything is holy, everything shimmers with the sacred presence if we only slow down enough to see.

Let's celebrate summer's gifts with a list of some things that should be done s-l-o-w-l-y:

Taking a long swim in the open water, feeling the stretch of your muscles.
Eating fresh sweet berries and peaches letting the juice drip down your chin and fingers.
Cooking a meal with complete loving attention to each chop, sprinkle, and stir.
Napping in a patch of sunlight.
Hiking deep in the emerald woods.
Ordering a soft-serve cone from the ice cream truck and giggling as it melts down your hand.
Buy yourself a bouquet of peonies or sunflowers at the farmer's market.
Listening to the rhythms of the ocean until you discover your own heartbeat hidden there.
Rubbing a dog's belly.
Rolling in the grass.
Letting a piece of music wash over you and knit itself into your being until you find yourself dancing.
Listening. To a friend, a spouse, a stranger. To silence, to the holy presence.
Making love and being loved. Treasuring the sacred gift of touch.
Gazing upon a work of art or a sunset and really seeing it. Gazing upon a loved one and really seeing them.
Transformation: The long slow process of becoming who we really are.
Breathing. In. Out. In. Out.
Grieving. Experiencing the fullness of sorrow and loss.
Basking in gratitude for the simple joys of each day.
Lingering under the bone-white face of the moon as she blesses the night.
Allowing at least one moment each day when you release doing and simply are.

Consider making a list of the summer gifts you love and then letting your summer practice be to enjoy one slowly each day. What are the things worth savoring? What might happen if you slowed down enough to hear deeply the God who speaks in sheer silence? What is being whispered to you there?

May each of your journeys unfold with a thousand delightful surprises these summer days. May the sun bring you the gift of illumination. May the sweetness of summer elicit a long sigh of surrender from the deepest places of your being.

With great and growing love,

Christine

Christine Valters Paintner, PhD, REACE

Photo © Christine Valters Paintner

2017 Ireland Pilgrimages | *Update*

We are delighted that our pilgrimages to Ireland for 2017 are filling up and so want to give you an update:

Monk in the World: Pilgrimage to the Sacred Edge of Ireland

August 29-September 6, 2016 – ONE SPACE LEFT

Details and registration here>>

Soul's Slow Ripening: Celtic Wisdom for Discernment

March 28-April 5, 2016 | September 19-27, 2016

Just a few spaces left!

Details and registration here>>

Writing on the Wild Edges: A Creative Pilgrimage & Retreat in Ireland

April 21-27, 2016 | October 5-11, 2017

Just a few spaces left!

Details and registration here>>

Listen to our Pilgrimage Preview Call:

http://abbeyofthearts.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2014/03/ARCHIVE-Pilgrimage-Preview-Call-EDITED.mp3

Or email us with any questions!

Visual Meditation:

A little video I made with some images of places you will be visiting (and song by Noriana Kennedy, a Galway musician):

Monk in the World Guest Post: Rich Lewis

I am delighted to share another beautiful submission for the Monk in the World guest post series from the community. Read on for Rich Lewis' reflection on being nudged by God.

Is God Nudging You?

What are you doing with the questions you are asked by others? Are these questions God nudging you to take a specific action?

Let me share two questions that I was asked that I believe were God nudging me to take further action upon.

Before I share my first question, let me provide some background information.  In early 2014, I began reading Healing The Divide: Recovering Christianity's Mystic Roots by Amos Smith. While reading Amos' book, I began emailing Amos questions about his book. What is the Jesus Paradox?  Why should I care?  Am I also a divine being?  What is this centering prayer?  To my surprise Amos responded and we began an email dialogue.  We continued to dialogue as I continued to read his book.

During May of 2014, Amos Smith asked me to co-author a book with him. Amos suggested that I write a book about what the Jesus Paradox means to me. (Amos defined the Jesus Paradox as, Jesus is “at once God and human”.  I spoke with my wife and within one week, I agreed.  Since June 2014, I have been taking time once a week for two to three hours at a local coffee shop to write my journey. My book chapters include topics related to:  prayer, centering prayer, the fruits of centering prayer, non-dual thinking, paradox, my inner divinity, the humanity of Jesus, the Cosmic Christ and the historical Jesus.

The point I want to make is that my response to this question sent me on an incredible journey into the Jesus Paradox.  I now wanted to learn more about this Jesus who was at once both human and God. If I had not been asked this question, I am not certain I would ever have begun this amazing journey which included becoming a daily centering prayer practitioner, exploring other contemplative practices, and learning more about both the historical Jesus and the Jesus of my faith.

Let's move onto the second question that I was asked. In June of 2015, a friend at church asked me to teach an introduction to contemplative prayer class at the adult forum at her church. She had recently finished seminary and was now Director of Education at this church. She knew I was a centering prayer practitioner. Initially I was nervous but I still agreed to take her up on this offer. Over about one week, I put together a one hour session that included a short video and left room for thirty minutes of questions.

In August of 2015, I taught this class.  Twelve people attended.  To my surprise, it went well!  There was much interest in silence as a new way to pray.  After this class, I thought to myself, why not take this on the road so to speak. I created an email and began contacting churches within a 30 mile vicinity of my house. I offered to teach a 45-60 minute introduction to centering prayer/contemplative prayer session at one of their adult forum settings. To my surprise, a few churches responded. Since August of 2015, I have taught at three more churches and I am coordinating with two other churches to come in and meet with them. I am also coordinating with another church to help them start up a centering prayer group for the local community.  This group will begin in the fall.

Recently, I also began contacting local colleges and universities and hope to meet with young adults. There seems to be much interest in contemplative prayer because soon I will be meeting with the campus minister at a local university to discuss how I can share contemplative prayer on the campus for students.  I believe that God was and is continuing to nudge me to share silent prayer with the community.

We are constantly being asked questions. I am not suggesting that we say YES to all these questions. However, I am suggesting that we slow down, be silent, pray and discern which questions are God nudging you to take action upon. God asked me two vital questions:  Do you want to write a book and do you want to teach a contemplative prayer class?  God was nudging me to share the Jesus Paradox and centering prayer with others. I pray that I continue to be open to God's future questions. I pray that you too are open to questions God is asking you. And more importantly, I pray that you take action upon them."

Rich Lewis is daily practitioner of centering prayer since June 1, 2014. Rich teaches contemplative prayer in his local community at churches, colleges and universities. Rich co-leads the RCMR team (www.RCMR5.org) and is currently writing a book with Amos Smith, author of Healing the Divide.

 

Ancestral Pilgrimage as Spiritual Practice ~ A love note from your online abbess

Dearest monks, artists, and pilgrims,

During July we are sharing some reflections from the Abbey Archives (and in August we will be taking a break from our daily and weekly newsletters for a summer sabbatical):

As we grow older we have more and more people to remember, people who have died before us. It is very important to remember those who have loved us and those we have loved. Remembering them means letting their spirits inspire us in our daily lives. They can become part of our spiritual communities and gently help us as we make decisions on our journeys. Parents, spouses, children, and friends can become true spiritual companions after they have died. Sometimes they can become even more intimate to us after death than when they were with us in life. Remembering the dead is choosing their ongoing companionship. ~ Henri J. M. Nouwen, Bread for the Journey

I stood there at the edge of the Baltic Sea, on the beach at Jurmala in Latvia, and I felt a deep kinship to this place, which I had never been to before. Perhaps it was standing at this borderland place where forest meets the sea, the same kind of landscape I had inexplicably fallen in love with in the Pacific Northwest of the U.S. Thousands of miles away I had met this place of wildness and fallen in love. As I stood in this ancestral land, I felt a connection, a kind of deep knowing.

Maybe the felt connection was because of the photos I have of my father playing on these same sands, the carefree days of his childhood long before the burdens of adulthood settled into his bones and the deep grooves formed on his forehead.

Whatever the source, walking this ancestral landscape brought me a sense of understanding and peace. My father had fled this country as a boy when the Russians invaded. He became a refugee, never to return home again in his entire life. I was making this journey in part on his behalf, to restore something that had been broken.

One of my primary spiritual practices these last several years is ancestral pilgrimage. A pilgrimage is a journey of meaning to a sacred site, in this case, a place that was significant for my ancestors. I trace my genetic lineage back through England, Austria, and Latvia and have traveled to each of these places, some multiple times, as a part of my personal journey.

These journeys have changed me and brought much healing to my life and called forth even more from me. In the summer of 2012 I made an even more radical choice. After several of these ancestral pilgrimages, my husband and I moved to Vienna, the city where my father grew up after leaving Latvia and is now buried, as a deeper commitment to continuing this ancestral journey.

A pilgrimage is a special kind of journey, one taken to a holy place with the hope for an encounter with the sacred and the intention of being changed by what happens there and along the way. We don't go on pilgrimages to return the same person.

I believe we are profoundly connected to the land and culture and stories of our ancestors in ways we don't fully realize. Their experiences, their sorrows and joys are knit into our bones, woven into the fabric of our very bodies. The impulse to discover one's story often leads you to reach far back into history. We can't fully understand the impact of these connections until we stand on the land and speak the language of those who came before us and gave us the gift of life through our ancestors.

When I stood on the shores of the Baltic Sea in Latvia and imagined my father playing as a child in the sand and the waves, I connected to this experience of longing. I understood him in new ways. I saw the innocence of a young boy before the war came and shattered everything he knew. May Sarton wrote in one of her poems: "Now the dead move through all of us still glowing . . . What has been plaited cannot be unplaited . . . and memory makes kings and queens of us." Remembering what has been already woven into us is the task.

Each time I prepare for these journeys with excitement and anticipation, as well as fear and trembling, knowing I will have to confront the shadow sides of my family system. But it is in facing the dark depths that I no longer have to live in fear of them.

"If your journey is indeed a pilgrimage, a soulful journey, it will be rigorous. Ancient wisdom suggests if you aren't trembling as you approach the sacred, it isn't the real thing. The sacred, in its various guises as holy ground, art, or knowledge, evokes emotion and commotion," writes Phil Cousineau, in his book The Art of Pilgrimage.

I believe, along with psychologist Carl Jung, that the stories of our ancestors run through our blood and the unhealed wounds and unfulfilled longings continue to propel us forward or keep us stuck in old patterns. The stories of our grandmothers and grandfathers are our stories and we can help to heal the wounds of the past and in the process heal ourselves by telling those stories again, giving voice to the voiceless, unnamed secrets and to the celebrations, insights, and wisdom gathered over time.

Jung introduced us to the concept of the collective unconscious, that vast pool of ancestral memory within each of us. It is a kind of deposit of ancestral experience. He believed it comprises the psychic life of our ancestors right back to the earliest beginnings. Nothing is lost; all of the stories, struggles, and wisdom are available to us. Each of us is an unconscious carrier of this ancestral experience and part of our journey is to bring this to consciousness in our lives. "I became aware of the fateful links between me and my ancestors. I feel very strongly that I am under the influence of things or questions which were left incomplete or unanswered by my parents and grandparents and more distant ancestors," he wrote. 

Consider making a pilgrimage to walk in the footsteps of your own ancestors, those everyday saints who struggled with life's heartaches and suffering. Spend time in the places that shaped their imaginations and their dreams; speak the language with which they whispered their most private secrets to one another, the words they used to express their aching sorrow and profound joy. It doesn't matter if you know nothing of the details. Walking, being, listening, and noticing the impact of trees, rivers, mountains, and sky on your own spirit is enough.

A pilgrimage doesn't have to be a long journey overseas. It might be to a nearby cemetery or a phone call with a living relative to ask about stories you have never heard before.

With great and growing love,

Christine

Christine Valters Paintner, PhD, REACE

Photo © Christine Valters Paintner

Monk in the World Guest Post: Gracia Sears

I am delighted to share another beautiful submission for the Monk in the World guest post series from the community. Read on for Gracia Sears' reflection on art and service.

I sit in  the living room of our condo; I can see the Gulf of Mexico from where I sit. I savor this space.  It is my “cell” for three months of the year.  I read, I walk, and do small watercolors in my attempts to capture the essence of this seascape with its western view, its sunsets.  I have long savored sunsets and like many people seek them in the many places we have called  home. Now as I enter the last stage of my life I find them more appealing. Day is done they say but also there will be a tomorrow. I believe that.

My journey as a monk in the world began 6o years ago when bored while on vacation with my parents and siblings I wandered into town from our camp site and bought a beginners oil paint set. For the next two weeks I immersed myself in the world of color and smell of pigments. I was no longer  bored, I was enthralled.  This began my quest, though many of obligations such as marriage and motherhood intervened, I carried this little set and dreamed of the day I would return to it Finally I did find the time and Art became my religion. I believe the artist Emily Carr coined the phrase but it resonated for me.

For years I felt my obsession with painting was separate from my involvement in churches as we moved around the country. Slowly I came to realize the healing of wounds I had incurred along the way found their way into paintings. Where I may not have had words I had images that helped me resolve some of this pain.  People found their way to my studio with their wounds and through painting seemed to find peace. It was during this time that I really felt that art was my religion.  Like the root of the word religion I was re-connecting with the source. My life was fulfilled by being a midwife to others who were on similar quests.

I know how precarious life is and I practice living in the moment. Sitting in my cell,  I practice being a monk in the world by loving unabashedly all who have come before and those who will follow.

About 15 years ago I saw an ad in a hospital newsletter seeking pastoral visitors. I felt a nudge and even though I felt being a Unitarian/Universalist that my approach would be too secular, I applied.  There was a lot of serendipity in this move. I thought I was about to leave my artist life behind but the managing chaplain had other ideas. She thought I could and should integrate the two. During the past 15 years I have worked to enrich the lives of staff and patients with doses of art and I have gone from secular to a much more  spiritual life.

I have enjoyed the many offerings from the Abbey for the Arts.  I generally take a course during the winter months when I am separated from my colleagues in the Spiritual Care Department of the Medical Center where I spend my time when I am back up North. These courses continue to fill a deep craving I have for the spiritual life.  I met Hildegard of Bingen through one of these retreats and continue to find more and more about her from the Abbey and other people who have been similarly inspired.

For many years I have turned to creating Mandalas in my quest for deeper insights so when the Abbey included them in retreats I enjoyed sharing and seeing what others did. I found it another way to communicate as I did with the poetry and photography offerings.

My horizons continue to expand and I turn to nature to fulfill this quest. I read reflections by  Rev. Richard Ruhr and Thomas Merton and find my need for a community by worshiping at a Congregational church when back up north. This is part of the United Church of Christ or UCC. I have been told the UCC stands for Unitarians considering Christ. I guess that is where I am these days. For now I am going to soak up as much of nature as I can and worship in this cathedral of the universe.

As I sit here writing I can see a cairn I assembled from a walk on the beach. It is a stack of shells I carefully assembled. Life is like this little marker. It could be toppled in a moment but like the sunsets it could also be created again."

Garcia Sears is a nurse and also has a BFA degree in select studies. She combines skill from each to act as a "midwife" to others. She has been married  for 57 years to a wonderful supportive man. They have 4 sons, 2 daughters in law and 6 grandchildren whose presence enriches their lives.