Anna DeStefano's Blog, page 19

Things My Teenager Says: On my way…

“One my way,” he texts, heading home from school.

Actually, he’s left school, had a burger with a buddy at a place nearby, studied a little (or sat and goofed around with said buddy while their laptops/books are open), and is now driving home. Yep. Driving. Freedom. Independence. And all he has to do is let us know where he is and when he’s heading somewhere else and be home at or around the time he’s told us he will be.

“K,” I text back.

Because, “Please be careful and don’t get distracted by your music. And look out for the crazy people on the road who’ll cut you off and not pay attention to what you’re doing. And how was school? And did you remember to stop for gas? Because your gauge isn’t always reliable in the Jeep. And don’t forget to text if you stop anywhere else…” might make me seem a bit anxious or overbearing or neurotic.

What?

I’m not.

Really.

I’m okay…

A month ago he had his learner’s permit. He was closer and safer and more contained, because he couldn’t just drive off on his own. And he wasn’t really acting as if he wanted to. Or even wanted to practice. Because practicing meant driving with us.

Now, he’s looking for ways to just drive and take the long way and stop here and there and just be free. My little boy. My young man. Who always texts and is where he says he’s going to be and drives so safe and carefully and aware of others, we’ve had friends who’ve seen him out and about who’ve remarked at how calmly and maturely he’s behaving behind the wheel.

He’s not breaking away. He’s driving away. He’s on his way…

And I’m so, so proud. Really.

I think I need a Valium.

The Soul of the Matter: Suck it up. This is life. Live it out loud!

“You’ve got to be kidding me!” we want to say some days. A lot of days lately. For so many people I know, this is a year of volatile change and redirection. “Enough is enough,” a lot of us have insisted, bending beneath the pressure but refusing to break. “I just want a little peace…” Understandable, unless what you’re saying is that you’d rather go back than forward. Reasonable, unless what you’re thinking is that the change is what’s crushing your sense of stability. It’s not. Life has gotten very real for a whole lot of my friends and family. It’s not at the moment something we can sit back and appreciate as we sip our coffee or toast with a glass of wine. It’s in our faces and demanding our attention and dragging us into its momentum as it shouts for us to wake up and LIVE!

Oh, come on. This is what we’re here for, right? To learn and grow and change and see what we’re mean to become next. It’s easy. To change jobs (or publishers) over and over until you find the right fit (hopefully…this time…), and somehow find a way to feel grateful that you have a job/publisher when so many others don’t. To pay all your bills as the teenager grows ever older and more of a money pit and to see your savings and retirement shrink because of the rising cost of living and the dwindle interest rates and volatile returns on stock market investments. To accept that retirement might be as far away a date for you now as it was when you first entered the workforce, but again, you’re working so keep you mind on the present and celebrate that joyous fact that the dollar you earn today is worth about a third of that first dollar you brought home straight out of college.

It’s easy to face all that and feel warm and fuzzy about your crumbling spot on the ledge overlooking the abyss, right? RIGHT?!

Yeah, I feel it too. That pinch. That pressure. That sense that everything’s spinning and spiralling and I’m clinging to my balance and putting everything I have into merely staying on my feet. But that’s reality, my friends. That’s what being alive feels like right now. That’s the world we’re living in, and we ARE lucky to be living it. To have choices and to have jobs and publishers and financial resources to compete for. 

The world can look grim all it wants to, but I tell myself every morning that I don’t have to see things that way. Every time I think I’ve reached my ledge, my final straw, I make myself step back and get a grip. This is just another challenge in a long line of expectations and set backs and opportunities to overcome that will come for me from now on. I’ve handled all the rest. I’ve handled much worse. So why get my knickers in a twist about this.

Move on. Suck it up. Kick this moment’s ass without letting it mess with your mind. We can inhale and then go on the offensive, or we can let change knock us for a loop. Sometimes we don’t have that choice. Some messes are too overwhelming to deal with rationally. But ones that aren’t are gifts. They’re moments to seize. They’re opportunities to prove to ourselves how far we’ve come and how much we’ve grown and how strong we are as we conquer and excel beyond our own expectations.

Yeah, this is a pep talk for me more than anyone else. So much going on. So many twists and turns and unexpected life changes to deal with. Yada yada yada…

But when you think of what today and every 9.11 we will ever see again stands for, one truth screams over the doubt and static and confusion of wherever we find ourselves. We CAN handle anything we set our minds to. We can not only overcome and endure, we can succeed and thrive and LIVE again, fearless and without doubt. There’s nothing we can’t face head on and drive through and fight until we’re in a better place, and then an even better one.

From all the heroes of this day, I choose to learn that anything is possible. I choose to believe that I’m capable of so much more than I ever imagined. I choose to live out loud with abandon and without fear.

I hope you do, too.

Publishing Isn’t for Sissies: Me and Dorchester, the CliffsNotes Version

You have to be willing to take risks in this business of ours. Calculated risks that are nonetheless precarious for the careful thought you put into jumping off whatever cliff of opportunity looms before you. Sometimes a marvelous parachute glides awaits you, easing you into your next step forward. Sometimes there turn out to be holes in your plan and you land in the trees–if you’re lucky. Sometimes you crash and burn completely. My experience with Dorchester Publishing these last few years, like many authors, has been more the latter.  But as of last week I can officially say it hasn’t been a crash and burn fiasco, and the trees that were grabbing at my chute are receding farther and farther away each time I look back. Perspective?One might call it that, this ah-ha sensation filling me. Hind sight gives us the illusion of finally seeing things as they were always meant to be. Maybe it’s just dumb luck… You be the judge.

Too often it feels as if I have absolutely NO idea how I got to this moment of deep sighing and appreciation for a journey well traveled and a fight bravely faced and won (Amazon, the publisher who also recently signed a three book deal with me to publish a women’s fiction/contemporary romance series has bought out Dorchester’s list at auction and will not only pay me royalties due from the last three years, but will re-list and potentially buy new titles into my sci-fi/fantasy series).

To be honest, I have some idea. But my mind’s still spinning as I process the twists and turns and decisions and retreats–stopping myself, ultimately, from making several end-game decisions that would have ended this wild ride before I achieved what I’d set out to. What follows is the CliffsNotes version of that adventure, because publishing can be a sucky journey for all of us and I’m happy to share my personal suckage if it might possibly help others finding themselves in their own potentially no-win situations, trying to choose the least objectionable of the unsatisfying options before them.

But first, let’s identify what exactly I wanted to achieve from the start. Because the best business decisions are potentially bad business decisions, regardless of the odds in your favor, if you don’t understand your goal. My best advice to anyone when they ask me my opinion of what they should do about a book, agent, publisher or contract is to figure out what you want and determine the best way to achieve that. Beyond that, I got nothing. Because as you’ll see below, the rules are always changing and what works for me or someone else now may be a no-win choice for you tomorrow. You have to be flexible in this business. You have to dodge and duck and know when to jump or stand still.  None of which you can do effectively if you aren’t sure where you’re headed.

My goal with my sci-fi/fantasy series: To establish my mainstream fiction work and to build a series for a broader audience than my contemporary romance roots, into which I could continue to sell future novels. Simple right?

Let’s take a closer look, shall we?

Round about the fall of 2008: Dorchester offers a 2-book deal for my Legacy Series. Dark Legacy to release nationwide in mass market paperback in the fall of 2009.
I deliver the book on time, but the advance money isn’t coming from the publisher as quickly as it should. Agent pushes hard behind the scenes, but we don’t pull the book from the schedule. It’s more important to my goal to be established as a mainstream author with bigger stories to sell than my category romance roots, than it is to join in the shrieks of dissatisfaction with the publisher beginning to rumble all over the Internet.
Fall, 2009: Dark Legacy in stores, positioned well, I’m signing in the B&N flagship store in New York’s Lincoln Center, and we’re off. Sales are good but nothing fabulous. We can do better, publisher says. My series is repositioned away from traditional romance and closer to the sci-fi/thriller market it’s better suited for.
Secret Legacy due to editor in early 2010 for a rushed summer 2010 release because they want to break it out. They’re behind this very different, edgy thing I’m doing with my mainstream work 110%. They’ve also by now paid me the advance I’m owed to date. Agent and I see this as a good chance to shine within a smaller traditional press, so I keep working.
Health issues and surgery prevent me from turning the second book in on time. Editor and publisher couldn’t have been more understanding. Deadline for delivering Secret Legacy is pushed to the spring of 2010, with a fall release. It’s the hardest writing period I’ve ever had, and I called my agent to quit more than once, but the book was finished and revised in a gruelingly short amount of time. If nothing else, this experience proved to me that I had to keep writing–if for no other reason than I couldn’t seem to make myself stop.
Fall 2010: Serious money spent on my part and committed by publisher to promote the book that should break out, even though remaining advance for the second book on the contract hasn’t yet been paid. However, lots of publisher plans–print and digital promotion. Extensive online blog tour being set up. Again, agent and I are staying focused on the publishing possibilities and my investing in my mainstream future, which means I continue to do my job and play nice while she rattles their cages fighting to get me the money owed.
Two weeks before Secret Legacy’s launch: it’s announced on the Internet (not to individual authors) that overnight Dorchester’s pulling their print publishing arm (meaning all my mass market print books are being yanked, never to be distributed retail) and beginning immediately  to shift to a digital first/print on demand business. My break out release: not going to happen. My sizable investment in promoting to mass market retailers and readers: wasted. My remaining faith in publisher: destroyed.

After a brief and frustrating talk with my editor who’s quoting the same “company” speak as the press release and not answering any of my questions about my book’s potential in this new business model, meanwhile she’s saying I have no choice contractually but to allow them to do whatever they want to with the release even though I haven’t been paid for delivering the manuscript months before…
My agent and I decide to ask for all rights under the contract to be reverted. Believe it or not, I’m sad to see this happen because Dorchester is looking to me as if, despite their financial troubles, they’re on the cutting edge of what our industry is becoming and making a hard choice other traditional publishers should be exploring just as aggressively.
Novenber 2010: Dorchester VP contacts me and my agent, expression his disappointment at our decision: they had such BIG plans for me and my work. I make it clear that I was given no other choice: no one was telling me what was going on, no one was assuring me in any way that my series and specifically the money I’d spent and lost preparing to promote Secret Legacy would be handled with the care and focus I’d been promised, and I still hadn’t been paid the last of advance money I was owed.
After much negotiation–remember, my over all goal is to establish myself as a mainstream fiction writer outside my series work, and to build an ongoing series for a broader audience–I’m paid, significant plans are made to promote Secret Legacy’s digital release, the release date is put off until spring 2011 so Dorchester can figure out its new business model and be better prepared to do right by the book, and my rights for the entire series stay with the publisher. Risky? Yep. In line still with my over all goal. Yep.
Spring/Summer 2011: Secret Legacy releases with a impressive online promotional plan. It and Dark Legacy do well. Much to my and my agent’s surprise, I end up tripling my advance for the contract in royalties owed, from mostly digital sales alone. I’m spotlighted at BEA and feeling like making the choice to partner with Dorchester instead of jumping ship was the right decision after all. Of course, we all know what happens next…
Fall 2011: Yep, Dorchester’s making money off authors but not paying out. To anyone. They’re increasingly non-responsive, even to the agents. They’re reverting rights left and right, but the books aren’t coming down off the digital retail sights. Law suits are threatened. Lots of negative press. They begin firing the rest of their staff and selling off parts of their business. Their NY office closes. Clearly they’re not going to make it. I should demand my rights back, right??? Well, even now it gets tricky.
Yes, I want my books back like everyone else (I’m working on a three-book continuation of the series I’d like to sell elsewhere if anyone else would consider publishing into an already published series, or maybe I could indie publish…) But I want my income from 2011, too. If I revert my rights, it becomes old debt and when Dorchester does sell or file formal bankruptcy that money won’t be paid–not like existing/active authors would. If anyone sues (in my case, it would involve something like a class action filing against the owner), bankruptcy is filed and everyone gets pennies on the dollar. And there are rumblings that Dorchester’s owner is looking for a buyer for the list–my books included–which would mean a home for my series and those future books I’d like to write.
My agent and I speak frequently, going over the options. Reverting my writes doesn’t get me paid my 2011 income. I have other books to write for other publishers and only a half-finished proposal to continue the Legacy series, so it’s not like she could shop the series yet anyway. And the idea of the series finding a good home through a buy out is appealing–my over all goal shifting to staying established as a mainstream author and to keep a home for my series that surprisingly did so well, but not well enough to have folks banging down the door demanding that I come write more for them. We decide to wait it out and see what happens next, because the benefits from flipping off Dorchester and pulling out don’t stack up against the potential gain from being patient.
January – May, 2012: From here out it’s a monthly battle to stick to that decision. Frustrating. Infuriating. My agent and I second guess ourselves every time we talk. But the reality doesn’t change. There’s not enough to gain from demanding the rights back for my books/series to warrant not seeing this through. We set an end of May deadline for Dorchester to come through on their “It’s a big online publisher and we’re close to a deal, hang in there with us” mantra, then we’re done.
Well it takes until July, 2012. But, as we expected, the buyer is Amazon (a publisher I’m already contracted with by this time). Actually, it takes from fall 2008 to late summer 2012, but I’m established writing mainstream fiction with a stable publisher, all the money owed me is coming my way (because I’m already in business with this publisher, and believe my they pay on time ;o), and the Legacy series has new life that I hope to exploit as soon as we see which imprint will list the books and how the rest of the process will work… None of which would have happened if at any point I’d made the logical, understandable decision to yank my books, throw my hands in the air and say I’ve had enough.

Why didn’t I pull out every step of the way, when I had a lot of logical reasons to? I couldn’t tell you, except that I had an over all business plan that didn’t allow me to make emotional decisions that would result in little or no practical improvement in my publisher situation.

Why did I take so many risks and continue to work with a publisher I couldn’t completely trust? I don’t have easy answers for that, either, except that at every step I was able to find Dorchester staffers I COULD continue to work with and ways of doing business with them that took me a step closer to my career goals–none of which included the immediate payment of the monies owed me (even though that would have been nice, and damn it I’ve been owed most of this money for way too long to have put up with the questionable business practices of the publisher’s owner):

I needed my books to be out there selling and to stay out there selling, building numbers that would look appealing to another publisher.
I needed Dorchester to promote the digital release of the second book on the contract in a way that proved I was appealing as an author in the new digital side of the publishing industry.
I needed to see my series placed with a financially sound publisher interested in listing my books and reaching a larger market with the series and looking at new ideas for future books.
In short, I needed to be able to continue selling and promoting my mainstream writing career on as large a publishing stage as possible. Other than indie publishing (which fails for far more mid-list authors than it’s a successful alternative for), that wasn’t going to happen no matter when I pulled my rights from Dorchester and gave up the income they owed me.

So there you have it, the honest, ugly, risky and maybe reckless truth of it.

I’ve been asked more times than I can count to tell this story in its entirety. It wasn’t until I signed the amended contract with Amazon that I felt I was close enough to a resolution to share intelligently where my personal Dorchester experience was going.

Maybe I got lucky. Maybe I was business savvy. Maybe I took good advice when it was given and pushed for better alternatives in return–I can’t say it enough that I have THE BEST agent in the business. Maybe it was all of the above.

All I know for certain is that I’ve somehow achieved my goals with this journey that’s finally ending, and I’m excited about the prospects of the new adventure I’m embarking on in mainstream fiction. I have no doubt that more bumps await me and every other author who stays in the publishing game. But I have to say that after all of this, I no longer doubt my ability to weather whatever storm hits next.

My advice when the storm comes for you? 

Already have a business plan before the water begins to rise.
Already have surrounded yourself with the best business partner(s) you can find.
Take calculated risks when you wish decisions could be more black and white.
Keep your head about you when you want to scream and take you toys and sulk on your way home.
Stay the course, even as others pull out and make choices that aren’t the best alternatives for you, even though you wish things could be that simple.
Keep writing.
Keep doing business.
Keep the lines of communication open for as long as possible.
Keep making future opportunities for yourself, in case your current situation doesn’t work out.

No publisher, no book, no business relationship is your only option, my friends. No failure or bad result is your end game, unless you decide you’re out of viable options. No disappointment is too great to fight your way back from, even if it takes a total of four years to get you to the finish line you thought it would be so simple to reach ;o)

Things My Teenager Says: I have to play games…

Disclaimer: Expect a flood of TMTS posts the next week or so… Mom’s having one of those months where changes and challenges are flooding the levee and the tide’s ripping the sand from under her feet. It’s one thing to know your child is changing and growing. It’s quite another to see him knowing it and filling with the pride and awe of it, confidence abounding and the world shining bright and free around him. So indulge the rush of emotion to come. I really can’t help it, and neither could you. This, all of this,  is why I started journaling in TMTS years ago. I seem to need it more and more each day. Bear with me ;o)

***

“Can we go by Game Stop on the way home?” my teen asks. Not an unusual an unsual request, and NOT one I mind, really, because too soon now he’ll be able to make that decision himself because he won’t need me for transpo to and from Mecca.

Still, why pass up the chance to give him a hard time while I still have him at my mercy?

“We just went there over the weekend. You bought something we couldn’t pry you away from for days.”

“Mom. I HAVE to play games now.”

Wait a minute.

“You HAVE to play games?” That’s a new one.

“It’s my job. And I’m in an advanced CAD design course at school, where the entire semester is a single project that we have to create on our own and then develop. I have to get my ideas from somewhere.”

“So playing games and dragging me to the shopping center twice a week is now homework?”

“And in my internship downtown–”

“It’s your job…”

I want to argue.

Except it’s the truth is, it IS his job.

And his homework. And we hope his ticket into competing for a place at the college of his choice (and hopefully for scholarships that his challenges with ADHD prevent him from nailing based on his grades alone). My kid, who’s loving life for so many reasons these days, and is FINALLY loving school and his place in it and has scored the dream summer internship that is now the dream year-long internship during the school year after auditing a college level design course over the break… He’s found a way to make his passion his job.

I veer into the turn lane that will take us closer to his favorite store and the future that are quickly morphing into the same reality.

“You’re amazing,” I say, not able to help myself when it’s always better to stay snarky with the boy, to protect my heart from the dagger more poignant moments can become to my well being.

“Mommmm,” the teen groans.

Next, he sighs. But he’s also smiling. He’s digging this moment as much as I am. “I’m just reserving a few games so I can pick them up the same day they come out. It’s no big deal.”

“It’s…” The words escape me for a moment? “It’s freaking cool that you’re making a place for yourself in a world that’s been your playground all along. Do you now how few people ever know what they want to do when they grow up, let alone make it a reality when they’re your age?”

I’m thinking of the people who say to me practically every day that they’ve always wanted to write a book or that they have a story to tell but have never tried to tell it or that they love writing but it’s only a hobby and how much they admire how hard I work to make it my career.

“I’m really glad I decided to go to this school, Mom.” He’s looking out the window instead of at me, and I don’t make a big deal about it, but this is the closest he’s come yet to saying thank you for riding his ass for two years to get him through the grueling first half of this charter school curriculum.

“You’re right where you’re meant to be, buddy. Just keep plugging away and there’s no limit to where you can be next.” When he heads for college and away from the buffer I always want to be to him between his future and the hard work and disappointment that too often come with dreaming large and risking everything for that one in a million chance to have it all.

“It’s no big deal.” He shrugs the moment off because he doesn’t want to have another one of THOSE conversations with his often misty mom.

“I know.” My voice is breezy and casual, while my insides are mush. It’s a pose I’ve gotten good at with this kid, while how much he makes me want to cling and hug and praise and shout to the world how amazing he is threatens to embarress us both on a dialy basis.

I’m pulling up in front of the game place, but he isn’t yet rushing out of the car.

 ”Go on,” I say instead of launching myself across the front seat to hug him and gush. “Go play so we can get you home to start the 10 hours or so of homework you’ve got tonight.”

He sighs again. Smiles again. Shaking his head, he shoves out of the car and practically skips into the amusement part this gaming store has become for him–the store whose manager tossed employment applications at him last time we were there because my guy would be The Bomb for them if he could fit a job working there into his next summer’s schedule. He’s that good at the games and at selling others on them and at showing people how to use them and now at creating them himself.

“Keep playing, kid,” I whisper to myself as he disappears inside.

And, yeah, there’s a bit of misty leaking out of the corner of my eye. But it’ll be gone before he comes back out. I’ll make certain of it. Because I never want to see him stop playing. I want to watch him like this for as long as I have him up close, and then from afar for as long as he’ll let me take a peek. Hopefully forever.

And hopefully, one day, he’ll realize that I’m as obsessed with playing games as he is–and that my favorite game of all has been the roller coaster ride of his life. It’s my passion. It’s my job. It’s so freaking cool I never want to stop playing, wherever the next generation of this takes us, for as long as he wants me along for the experience.

“Never stop playing…”

Manly men know when to back away slowly

Current events of late, of the political kind, have left me a-wondering how some men can be so lame.Not that we’re talking politics. Soooo not sexy these day, the political chatter.

 

But let’s DO talk about sexy men. A man who’s sexy because he knows how to respect a woman. He lets her know just how special she is for having brains and determination of her own, and—most importantly—he knows how to step aside and let her shine when it’s her turn to lead.

Let’s play a name that sexy man game, shall we?

Our prompts—the strong women we (and their men) like to watch kick ass! Join me over at The Naked Hero blog for more… Yep, this is a field trip day.

Here’s a little taste of the fun we’re having over there ;o)

Angelina Jolie

 

 

How We Write: When we don’t wanna!

When you’re a tech writer, you learn you have to have head’s-down writing days. Whether you’re in a busy office or working at home and everyone’s pinging you on your laptop through your DSL or whatever and the phone won’t stop ringing, you have to learn how to tell everyone that you can’t chat today, or do lunch, or even make a hour-long meeting that should only take fifteen minutes. You have a certain number of pages to get done to stay on your project plan, and that’s just the way it’s going  to be. You’re not moving from your desk or even going to try and pretend to be social until they’re done.

Fiction writers need head’s-down days, too. I was talking with someone yesterday about meeting daily page count goals. If I could do it writing 600 pg. security administration guides (brain damge would be a more interesting pursuit), I can damn well do it writing something fun like how to make dreams leathal or how to kill a bad guy with a Yoo-hoo-spewing vending machine (don’t ask). Your daily fiction writing goal is your professional project. If you have to, make a formal plan to track it. Then follow the plan. Even if you think you can’t be creative today. Of course you can be creative. You’re a creative writer. It’s you job. DO IT.

Sorry for yelling. I’m on target to write more this year than I have in the last two years combined, and I think it’s getting to me

AND I know it’s not that simple. We all have lives, and some of us (me included) work at home and that comes with a whole other world of distractions. But be committed to your page count. To your story. It has to be a priority. Otherwise, you’re not giving your creative job your all. And it will show in the characters and plot you develop.

At any given time, I’m working on revisions for one book, a draft of another, promotion for a third, and hopefully a new pitch or synopsis I need to sell. How–I keep my butt in the chair and work until what I need to get done is done. On top of everything else. Despite everything. Everything else sometimes just has to take a back seat…

Otherwise, you might start to wonder if “everything else” has become your easy out for NOT following your publishing dream every day.

Maybe because inside you’re sure you’ll never make that dream a reality???I know a lot about that kind of fear. But I had to give up that particular character flaw when I decided to make a living from my writing. Or, at least not indulge it so often I don’t actually get the books written and into the publishers who want to sell then.

Just like everyone else, procrastination used to keep me from believing I could do what I had to do. Until I decided to knock it off. Ba-bye! Yeah, I wish it had been that easy. It’s a daily struggle. But at least I know it’s the fear I’m fighting now, not the story or the pages themselves. For me, that made all the difference in the world. If you know the enemy you’re fighting, you’ll know how best to defeat him. My solution–my butt stays in the chair going numb until I make the progress I need to. Period.

There’s a lot we can’t control every day–but keeping our asses in the chair and our hands on the keyboard working toward our dream for as long as possible every day isn’t one of them. What project have you been putting off, because it seems too big to tackle? Why not dive in this week and bang it out? Accomplishing something that’s been hanging over your head is an amazing feeling–it will inspire you to do more.

Putting stuff off when you can is okay. We all do it–especially working writers. As long as the work eventually gets done. When your eventually arrives, it’s time for some head’s-down work. Get it done. Tell procrastination Ba-bye!

The Soul of the Matter: Milestones and pushing beyond them…

Whatever your long-term goal, meeting short-term milestones is the key to success. As is  enduring between them. The troughs between the high points is where it’s easiest to quit. Our souls are most vulnerable there. Our love for competing with ourselves is most at risk. It’s these between places where we’re more likely to hit a wall we feel we can’t possible scale…

I’ve achieved several of work/book milestones the first half of 2012: getting back under contract; finishing novels; building up the editing side of my business; rediscovering what feeds me as an artists and committing myself to that journey above all else.

Personally, there have been even more highs: 21st wedding anniversary; my teenager’s success in his 3rd semester of high school, his kick-ass internship, his (waaaaaaa!) obtaining his driver’s license and next step toward freedom; my getting a handle on the health issues that have ground most everything else into the dust for 3 years and owning, along with my artistic inspiration, what will be required likely for the rest of my life to keep me thriving.

Startling progress for six months of living, particularly after the slow down that became my 2010 and 2011… Then I hit a wall in July that narrowed my focus to quite honestly getting through the next minute, next hour, next day, next deadline. So help me God, I was going to get through! And I did. Where, exactly, did July and the first part of August go?

No wonder all I want to do right now is sit in a corner and quietly, passively, watch the world go by.

Like with the distance runners and swimmers we cheered on in the Olympics, just before and just after a peak in performance we’re exhausted as our bodies and minds are wanting to let down. We’re inspired, yes, but often least able to believe that pushing through MUST be done before all else. Our focus is skewed toward a short-term goal, and we begin to wander, to wonder, to miss the point0–that the journey is key, not the result. The nearest result is the most important in our eyes, and it can begin to seem not as valuable as resting and relaxing and breathing and sleeping. We’re either reaching toward or recovering from something amazing, and so we begin to say to ourselves, “That’s enough. No more. Why put yourself through the next push you’re going to have to make, when you’ve achieved so much already?”

We’re drained, the creativity is literally dripping out of our pores and we’re running on empty…The very best of our creativity fading away with our need to recharge…

So why  not make the rest we need a permanent vacation? Why fight through the last milestone and start all over again, reaching for the next?

Because we’re fighters, that’s why. We want the next goal, too, as much as we wanted the last one. We crave creating and sharing and starting over and, yes, finishing the next fight, the next struggle, the next beautiful thing that begins and ends with our efforts and determination and inspiration.

Here’s to the next push, my friends. I’m back to blogging and social media and daily writing. I have two more major writing projects to finish before the end of the year, along with lots of smaller tasks to complete. Ambitious stuff, particularly with a Christmas release coming out in October. But my family’s behind me and I’ve taken a few weeks to rest, and my friends are lining up to cheer and encourage and keep the creative fuel I need flowing through my veins.

Here’s to the last five months of 2012, the next two major goals, and all the smaller triumphs and challenges in between… It’s time to push onward. It’s time to refocus on the long-term, not stay stuck in merely the bliss of a static now.  In this between place, it would be so easy to say I’m done. But my soul needs more. It needs to see the next challenge achieved as well.

Join me (and hopefully feel just as inspired yourself), won’t you?

What’s Your Favorite: Beer, Liquor or Wine…

Hands down the FUNNEST interview I’ve given, chock full of unexpected questions that got me answer more candidly than I ever have before. If you’re brave enough to do the same, you just might win something ;o) Join me at Simly Ali.

Enjoy!

USA Today Happily Ever After Blog Spotlight: Cole Marinos

Here’s a teaser from my USA Today interview…

“I’ve written a lot of heroes who could pick me up and carry me away from danger. But I think Cole is the closest I’ve come to my dream man. Someone who would truly put his life on the line for someone he loves, take that bullet, and never flinch — even if there’s no guarantee the other person will ever know how much he’s sacrificed.

Sigh … I LOVE my job!”

And here’s the link.

Enjoy yourself some Cole today. Does a body good!

FREE NOOK! Spread the word…

We’re celebrating the launch of Dead Sexy Books by giving away a Nook Simple Touch!  Enter to win using our Rafflecopter entry form on the Entangled blog.  

 

Spread the word and check out our launch titles. Runner up winners receive a free Indulgence, Ever After or Flirt!

Join our #HeroWars today on Dead Sexy’s Facebook page–to learn and gab about Cole and Vic… Two of our Dead Sexy launch hotties. Misa and I are slugging it out! ;o)

Sacrifice of Passion by Melissa Bourbon Ramirez

No Hero by Mallory Kane

Her Forgotten Betrayalby yours truely

Deady Secrets, Loving Lies by Cynthia Cooke