A.R. Mitchell's Blog, page 14
March 2, 2023
It Wasn't Fun - But You Won
As promised… the basics of “It Wasn’t Fun - But You Won”
If you need a re-read of the scene its here.
There’s a lot going on. I’ll try to reduce it down to basics.
***
She trembled, her eyes pressed shut, her heart thundering in sheer terror. She held her fists in front of her face clenching her fingers
First - pay attention to what’s going on in your body. If you’re comforting or protecting a scared person, pay attention to what’s going on in their body language.Here’s a body language analysis of predator and prey in the animal kingdom. For us as caring humans focused on healing, its helpful to replace predator with protector, and prey with scared person.
How To Look Brutally Powerful Without Saying A Word
If you’re not comfortable with this, I want to give you a quote from Jason Jones, founder of Human Rights Education Organization. He said, “When men aren’t given the tools to be protectors, they turn into predators.” (I’ll post the podcast link below.)1
***
He knelt softly, blocking her from the other’s questioning views.
Second - this is what caring powerful people do. They protect. They are powerful enough to put the percieved threat behind them, and focus on the person who needs help.This movement of kneeling and getting on the level of the scared person, creates connection and empathy. It also through body language reduces fear, because there’s some part of us that still goes, “Things that are taller than me are scary!”
If you don’t think you’re ready for this, remember your shadow. Your shadow has the survivor skills to be this powerful. The Shadow
As a reminder, this is for healing between you and yourself. You don’t need to practice this type of healing with others. You might get there eventually - but you’re still working on your own healing.
***
“Want a hug?”
She nodded. Then shook her head. “I hate this!
He sat down beside her. “I’m right here.”
Third - be present with the emotions that are going on. They’re probably going to be terrifying and confusing. And you will probably feel frightened and threatened by them… but emotions are not life threatening. Its important that we experience them. Its equally important that we give space to feel these emotions when they come up in others and ourselves.This is important for survivors and non-survivors to understand: Human touch has been used to harm, so comfort using human touch can accidentally be interpreted as a threat.
People can be present and connected without touch. Just sitting together, sharing the space with care and empathy, instead of allowing the frightened person to be upset at their fear and start attacking themselves, can be helpful.
Patience, empathy, understanding, compassion and active listening are key here.
***
“That I didn’t have to like it - but I shouldn’t let it stop me?”
Fourth - you don’t have to like what you’ve been through. You don’t have to like your reactions. But fear shouldn’t be allowed to stop you. Defiance is a massive piece of healing as you work through the pain.Defiance is what will rework your brain. It is also a key piece in the Character Traits of Hero. All the character traits researcher, Nechema Tec mentioned are supported by defiance. This is directed defiance against the status quo of persecution and pain. This is defiance of healing.
What does healing defiance look like?
“I don’t have to like what I’m feeling, or the horrors I’ve been through - but I’m not going to let it stop me from surviving and thriving. It wasn’t fun - but I won. I won by defying and surviving. And I’m gonna heal up - and work against the evil that was done to me.”
***
“The only way you lose is to not get out alive. Every survival is a victory.”
Fifth - This means you can let your fear reaction happen… because your body’s fear reactions are a form of protection and detoxification. They help the healing process. Your fear reactions, the ones you keep blocking - those are helping you survive.And if you’ve been through bad things - and the fear reactions are still coming, that’s ok too - because you survived it. You can celebrate that you passed out. You can celebrate that you didn’t have to kick the person who scared you. You can celebrate your jog out of the crowded room. You can celebrate your panic attack and how many people stared at you.
Why?
Because you’re still alive!
Every survival - including your flickers, flashbacks and panic moments - are reminding you how you survived in that moment.
Every survival is a victory.
***
“Then why does my body feel like it’s going to die every time I get into an enclosed space?”
“Your body is protecting you. Every person has a self defense system inside them. It may not look like throwing punches, but this trembling and shaking… it’s protecting you. Its a freeze reaction, instead of a fight reaction, like you prefer.”
Sxith - Your body protects you. That’s why your thinking brain leaves the room when we get scared.Our thinking brain can rationalize its way out of anything - unfortunately, that talent gets in the way of basic survival instinct.
When its a life or death situation - you won’t be able to use logic to escape. That’s why your brain leaves, and lets your body take over.
That’s the protection. That’s the self defense. Its protection because you and your body want to survive, whether you realize it or not.
There are multiple reactions that our bodies have to fear. All start with the brain leaving the room….
The important thing is that out of the multiple reactions there is no best one. There is also no good/bad dynamic. You’re not bad because your body chose to pass out over running away.
You as logic human with a brain, don’t get to choose your reactions. Your body chooses your reactions when your brain leaves the room.
Its like the secret service and president. If there’s a threat, the secret service works to get the president (brain) out of the room. Then they react to the threat (fear).
***
“I can’t be angry at the little girl I pulled out of a tomb. And that’s where you go when this happens. As much as you’d like to be that brave capable young lady that you are - your inner little girl knows that she almost died in a place like this, while your adult young lady is ready to take on the world.”
Seventh - As adults, we slip back into childhood, when we get scared. This happens to everyone.I didn’t want to believe it, and its horrendously difficult to swallow because you’re left with a very scary world of tiny children in charge and seemingly no adults in the room... which raises the question to many who crave healthy protection from fear:
If there are only children who can’t protect themselves, who’s going to protect me?
This is why we have fiction. This is why we have heroes. They are strong men and women who we get to watch have victories and do the good that’s needed in this world. When we get scared, and our brains leave the room - we borrow courage from these heroes. And that courage serves to move us from being in fear - to being IN COURAGE -
…Because a hero can fight bad people and protect from bad things… and a good hero knows how to help a scared child.
The conflict between the adult trying to do the adult thing, and the child who needs something, has to be addressed, as you face each thing or situation that you’re afraid of.
***
But here’s the secret to: ‘it wasn’t fun, but I won.’ Em, if there was a little girl here, like your niece, Laurel, would you let her be scared?”
Emily swallowed. “No.”
Indy’s voice dropped into tenderness. “Then what are you doing to yourself, littlest artifact?”
“Yelling at the tiny me?”
Indy cracked a grin. “And what should you be doing?”
“Protecting her and not being angry that she’s scared…?”
Eighth - And you shouldn’t be angry at the child who needed help either. Give the child what they need to survive and thrive. Give them what should have been given.When we move IN COURAGE, paired with empathy and compassion, (like a hero), we can find that little child who is also us and say, “I love you and it is a good fearless love. I’m here to rescue you. Are you ready to go?”
***
“It Wasn’t Fun - But I Won” SummaryThe shadow skills which are for your survival, need to be paired with empathy to create a hero/shero, or a trusted compassionate protector.
Once you have the compassionate protector, they are able to get between you and the threat.
The compassionate protectors are strong enough to focus on you instead of the threat, because they know they’ve won. Your inner child doesn’t have that knowledge. And that’s why the hero/shero has to kneel and connect with the child, listening to them.
Once the connection is made, the compassionate protector can use their shadow skills to rescue the child.
The ultimate goal is that you are able to become this compassionate protector, not only for yourself but others.
“I love you and it is a good fearless love. I’m here to rescue you. Are you ready to go?”
Perpetual Disclaimer for this series:
I am not a counselor or a mental health professional. I am going to attempt to avoid things which will cause alarm or harm, but I can't know what will trigger each individual. If you need to speak to a mental health professional please know that there are resources available.
Your stories are amazing!
Chronic Writer
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A. R. Mitchell's Goodreads Page
1The podcast mentioned earlier: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/he-loved-his-baby-then-his-girlfriends-dad-forced-her/id1450317086?i=1000454667227 (The podcast speaks about abortion, so it might be triggering for some. I listened to it because I needed a male perspective for a character.)
February 23, 2023
The Road of Trials
Defiance is a beautiful part of healing.It wasn’t fun - but you won.So why is this victory so difficult to handle when you’re no longer in that traumatic place?The answer: Your body got used to being in that trauma causing place.
When we are stressed as humans, the body reads stress, whether its long term or short term stress, as the same thing. The difference is that the body is built for short term survival stress.
Long term stress makes the body buckle down into survival mode. Its like hitting the gas pedal on your car. You’ll get out of the situation, but it burns more gasoline to get to the location faster and your car may not last as long the more time you spend going fast.
Survival from trauma is long term survival stress. Your body adapted to the go-fast-high-stress for a long term situation. It wasn’t fun, but you won by surviving. Unfortunately, your body wired itself into hyper vigilence survival mode. This is like adding a high quality racing fuel to a minivan. The van isn’t built for racing - but it will go fast and probably fall apart on the way.
Your body and brain were wired for fast hyper vigilence survival because of trauma. And when bad things happen, our bodies get stuck there. Its not faulty wiring - because it let you survive, but its also not the greatest for your physical and emotional system.
Now… I could give you all the sciency stuff and steps for calming your system down, but as great as checklists are, they won’t implement those things with empathy. In the healing process, empathy needs to happen, and we need to practice that on ourselves. So I’m going to let my dad and daughter archaeologist duo, Indiana and Emily Jones take over in piece of fan fiction from the sequel to The Sidenstrasse Tapestry. This is from The Seven Swords of Diya, also me writing fan fiction.
You won’t need to read the fiction piece, but I will return to it next week, because I want to show the power of story to teach, create and change things.
A bit of background… Emily Jones was trapped in a tomb cave in when she was four and has been terrified of small spaces ever since. Unfortunately the artifact she and her dad are searching for, is found in an underground cave system full of small spaces. Em is eighteen. Her father is in his sixties.
You won’t see it in this scene, but one of the scholars I often link to is Dr. Michael Heiser, and The Seven Swords of Diya incorporates a lot of his work. I wrote about him in a post. You can read it here.
You won’t need to read the bigger pieces to have any of the information. Again, if you’re not an action adventure fan, I completely understand, but if you are:
The Sidenstrasse Tapestry can be found here.
The Seven Swords of Diya can be found here.
IT WASN’T FUN - BUT YOU WON(from The Seven Swords of Diya: An Indiana Jones Fan Fiction, by A. R. Mitchell)
Emily trembled, her eyes pressed shut, her heart thundering in sheer terror. She held her fists in front of her face clenching her fingers.
“Em?” Her father asked softly.
Indy knelt, blocking Em from the other’s questioning views. “Em?”
“I can’t do this!”
“Not right now you can’t,” he murmured. “Want a hug?”
She nodded. Then shook her head. “I hate this!”
Indy sat down beside her. “I’m right here.”
Emily turned and fell into her father’s shoulder.
Indy smiled and put his arm around her shoulders, waiting for the trembling to ease. He’d grown patience through the years of parenting. “Em, I remember a little girl who didn’t want to grow up, and now she’s an amazing young lady who is brilliant, charming, strong and talented. Remember what I told you then?”
“That I didn’t have to like it - but I shouldn’t let it stop me?” She looked up.
“Yeah. That’s it.” Indy lifted her hat brim. “The same thing’s true about fear, darling. I’m terrified of snakes, yet I got your mother out of a snake pit. You’re terrified of small spaces and you’re gonna get through this and then look back and say it wasn’t fun… but I won.”
“Didn’t I do that in the tomb when I was four?” The trembling returned. “And again when I was stuck in the crevasse outside of Kashgar? How many times do I have to do this?”
She pulled away from Indy and hid her face, “How does this look like a win? Panicking in a ball on the ground doesn’t feel like a victory!”
Her father’s voice was gentle, yet the truth cut through her pain and fear. “Em, the only way you lose is to not get out alive. Every survival is a victory.”
She still wouldn’t meet his gaze. “Then why does my body feel like it’s going to die every time I get into an enclosed space?”
“Your body is protecting you. I taught you self defense when you were little, because I wanted you to feel protected when I wasn’t around. Every person has a self defense system inside them. It may not look like throwing punches, but this trembling and shaking… it’s protecting you. Its a freeze reaction, instead of a fight reaction, like you prefer.”
“I hate it! It makes me feel like a wimp!”
“You’re not a wimp, darling, Emily. You’re my littlest artifact, and I love you.”
“How can you? This is horrible!”
“Because I can’t be angry at the little girl I pulled out of a tomb. And that’s where you go when this happens. As much as you’d like to be that brave capable young lady that you are - your inner little girl knows that she almost died in a place like this, while your adult young lady is ready to take on the world.”
Emily raised her head. “You’re not mad…?”
Indy smiled at his daughter. “Why would I be mad, Em?”
“Because… the other adventurers would be! They would gripe about how annoying females are and say I shouldn’t come along -”
“They aren’t lucky enough to be a dad,” Indy replied. “How are you feeling now?”
“Still mad at me.” She thunked her head against Indy’s chest.
“Aw, littlest artifact, this takes awhile to learn. But here’s the secret to: ‘it wasn’t fun, but I won.’” He eased her away from him so he could see her face and make certain she was understanding. “Em, if there was a little girl here, like your niece, Laurel, would you let her be scared?”
Emily swallowed. “No.”
He lifted Em’s hat brim slightly. “Would you yell at her about being scared?”
“No.” She ducked away from his gaze.
Indy’s voice dropped into tenderness. “Then what are you doing to yourself, littlest artifact?”
“Yelling at the tiny me?”
Indy cracked a grin. “And what should you be doing?”
“Protecting her and not being angry that she’s scared…?” Emily asked.
Indy nodded. “That’s my girl! I’m so proud of you for getting this far in the cave system, Em.” He kissed her forehead and pulled her hat back down. “Ready to go when you are, littlest artifact. And if you get scared, I’ll be right behind you to pull you back out of the tunnel. Just like I did when you were four.”
“Promise?”
“Promise.”
Next week, I’ll break down what happened in this scene and how you can apply it to your healing journey! Until then, sit with this scene, re-read it a few times, pay attention to your emotions and then next time you get overwhelmed or frightened - check in with your emotions and see if things are different.
Perpetual Disclaimer for this series:
I am not a counselor or a mental health professional. I am going to attempt to avoid things which will cause alarm or harm, but I can't know what will trigger each individual. If you need to speak to a mental health professional please know that there are resources available.
Your stories are amazing!
Chronic Writer
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February 16, 2023
The Road of Trials
DiscoveryLast week I mentioned that trauma hides itself well… and we often hide it from ourselves. This is a natural human body protection. Its not always healthy, but it is a thing we as humans go through. Its sort of a physical equvalent to when we say, “I don’t want to think about that right now.”
But there is a downside to this. If we don’t work with the issues when they come up (as we can and its safe to do so), the trauma gets stuck deeper and deeper into our bodies. This deeper stuck trauma can lead to health problems.
Now - not everything health problem related is a trauma. And trauma does not cause every health problem, but it is important that we talk about the body. Healing trauma isn’t just ‘mental health’… we live in a body. And that body needs care just like our mental spaces. (I did a post on mental spaces: Dealing with Inflammatory Information) The reverse is true as well… your broken heart is just as worthy of care as another person’s broken leg.
But for many of us - we are walking wounded, and we don’t know it. We’re walking around with deep trauma and injuries going… “I’m fine. Yep. Missing a leg and my arm’s back in Cincinnati, Ohio - but I’m good. Move along folks.”
The reason for this is because we got used to walking wounded. We were told things as children or in relationships that we trusted and we took those things and thought they were ours… but in reality, those unhelpful things belonged to someone else. We’ve been carrying their emotional luggage, mistaking their bag as ours. We don’t need their hairbrush or the lice that come with it. But ditching those emotional things isn’t as easy as washing your hair.
So, how do we tell what’s ours and what’s theirs?That takes practice. A key question to ask is, “Do I need this on my trek?”
Other questions are:“Is this helping me or hurting me?”
“Is the person who gave it to me important in my life currently?”
“Is this something I believe or am I holding it for them?”
If you don’t need it, or don’t want it - you’re more than welcome to toss that bag outta the jeep. Guarding your mental space from it coming back doesn’t have to be difficult. The human mind and body is wired to associate motions and thoughts. So if you have the mental practice of something and you have a physical motion to go along with it - that physical motion will give your body something else to think about. The physical motion will also help rewrite and rewire your brain.
Perpetual Disclaimer for this series:
I am not a counselor or a mental health professional. I am going to attempt to avoid things which will cause alarm or harm, but I can't know what will trigger each individual. If you need to speak to a mental health professional please know that there are resources available.
Your stories are amazing!
Chronic Writer
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February 9, 2023
The Road of Trials
Damaging BeliefsSince trauma and healing are complicated, and western culture doesn’t seem to understand it as well as some more indigenous non-western cultures - I wanted to take this week and talk about some of the attitudes I’ve encountered from people who just don’t get it.
There are many people who have never been through or acknowledged that they have been through really horrible things. They don’t realize that they too are walking wounded. Trauma hides itself well… and we often hide it from ourselves. But because these people haven’t looked at their own stuff, they presume everyone, like a seasoned boxer or mixed martial arts fighter, can take the punches of trauma and get back up in the boxing ring and hammer out another round.
PS: I took martial arts for years before my chronic illness threw a knock out punch that I couldn’t ignore. For those who have been in abusive relationships or felt powerless, I really recommend martial arts or self defense to get your empowerment back. I don’t want to advocate violence, but self defense is not violence. They came after you and you deserve peace. But sometimes peace needs some enforcement.
If you’re not in the space to handle some of the truly awful things that are shared by clueless people, I understand.
If you don’t want to read the rest of the post, not a problem - Instead!!!!!!
Valentine’s Day is coming up. I have a freebie story on Amazon Kindle available for free until Sunday February 12, (2023). If you don’t have a kindle device or a tablet you can access kindle stories through your Amazon account.
Here’s how: In the drop down menu where you sign in at there’s a tab that says ‘Orders’. Click on orders. Then click ‘digital orders.’ Under digital orders it should show the book you just downloaded. To the left there’s a button that says, ‘Manage content and devices’.
After that you’ll see a screen like this:
You’ll click on the right side where there’s a button that says, ‘More actions’.
There’s a drop down menu there.
Fourth option down is, ‘Read Now.’ If you click there you’ll be taken to a new page where you can read your kindle purchases, even if you don’t have a Kindle device.
For those of you who have tablets and mobile devices, go to your provider’s app store and download the kindle app. It’s offered free from Amazon.
Back to the Road of Trials!Here’s a few things people have said to me on the topic of trauma:What doesn’t kill you - makes you stronger.
No. What doesn’t kill you - doesn’t make you stronger. Its the healing from what tried to kill you where you find the strength. If you’ve got a concussion, or a broken bone, you don’t go back into the fight. That’s just good injury prevention. The same is true for mental health and trauma. Hidden injuries of the soul are no less real than a broken bone.
Aren’t you glad this bad thing happened? Now you can empathy for others!
No. I am not glad this bad thing happened. No one should be glad or thankful that bad things happen. And empathy comes after safety and healing. You don’t get wounded and think about the person who injured you. (Ask a soldier in a war zone. They get wounded - they shoot back.)
You do not EVER need to have empathy for those who wronged you. They chose to hurt you. The best thing you can do is leave. Anyone who uses empathy, mercy or love to play on your emotions after an injury they caused is a dangerous predator and you need to leave.
You’re so angry! Just forgive them!
This gets thrown around a lot in religious circles. I’ve also heard it from people who wanted me to forgive because they thought it would help healing. Lastly and mostly, its used by people who are afriad of anger.
First - you were wronged, so hell yes - you’re allowed to be angry. And anger is and can be toxic for the body - but so is not processing the anger. Not having the emotion, doesn’t make the wrong go away. So, yes, be angry… but fuel that anger toward something productive that will not harm you, those around you, or property. There is a place for anger. Its a survival skill. If Ice Age man hadn’t gotten angry and killed the cave bear threatening his family’s shelter and food supply, we probably wouldn’t be around today.
Second - the forgiveness thing. You don’t have to. It may not be safe to forgive the other people. Forgiveness comes when there is safety. Forgiveness is for parties that are equal… or else its given under duress as a survival instinct, called fawning.
All the talk about forgiveness being good for you - presumes equality. Its not a power move to accept the perpetrator back into your life in order to create harmony in the community. And perpetrators should not be in the same communities with victims. Let me very unscientifically and non-linguistically trained break down the word “Perpetrator: Purposeful traitor.”
Forgiveness doesn’t cover purposeful intent to harm on a repeated basis. That’s called criminal intent which leads to criminal activity and people used to be banished into the wilderness to be eaten by the descendents of cave bears for purposeful intent to harm.
Any community who isn’t comfortable with banishing perpetrators and protecting victims, will always make the victims unsafe and become a haven for predators.
Perpetual Disclaimer for this series:
I am not a counselor or a mental health professional. I am going to attempt to avoid things which will cause alarm or harm, but I can't know what will trigger each individual. If you need to speak to a mental health professional please know that there are resources available.
Your stories are amazing!
Chronic Writer
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February 7, 2023
A Special Post
As a writer of fiction, I end up having to research some very strange things…
This is a special post dedicated to a scholar who has helped me tremendously, Dr. Michael Heiser. He has been diagnosed with stage four pancriatic cancer and announced on his Facebook that he has weeks to live. This is after a long struggle with cancer.
Dr. Michael HeiserThis is the second scholar in my life whom cancer has stolen. Oh, and if I could make war on cancer and steal these men back - I would. But in the tradition of great mythological heroes, and Dr. Heiser’s own beliefs - the world of the dead belongs to the Unseen Realm, a supernatural realm which is not for humans to tread.
Dr. Heiser and his research walked into my life after the passing of a scholar who I’d been working with on a web series passed away… from… you guessed it… cancer.
So Dr. Heiser was an amazing sequel… and a vital resource to my writing. We were kindred spirits in anything old and weird, even though we’ve never met. He managed to make the connections and had the technology skills to reach millions throughout the world.
And he wasn’t afriad of controversy. He went to UFO conferences, he appeared on the tv show Ancient Aliens, he worked for a Bible software company, wrote science fiction novels, debunked badly done history, taught on the historical connections that even I, in the weird circles I travel in, hadn’t uncovered. He annoyed Christians by teaching the ancient worldview of the Israelites, valued the Old Testament in an age where Christians want ‘nice’ instead of authentic faith, and deeply appreciated what he called ‘the metanarrative’ of the Bible… which was always, ‘God wants his family back.’
Regardless of your belief in God - reunion with a loving family is something we all want. Loving community is something we all need.
I found Dr. Heiser because of the Nephilim. I was searching out real research on the topic for an upcoming fictional series featuring the Nephilim and only finding ancient alien references, which I hated.
There’s a weird verse in the Bible about ‘the sons of god’ creating a race of semi-divine beings or giants called the the Nephilim. (Here’s the verse: Genesis 6:4 - New International Version) Many ancient cultures viewed them as the superheroes of their civilization’s prehistory. Modern day people either ignore them, or claim the Nephilim were space aliens.
But the piece that broke me… was Dr. Heiser’s heart for trauma victims.
This is something no one in all the memorial/thank you/legacy blog posts is discussing.
Many strange stories are coming from the community of rescued human trafficking victims. Regardless of your beliefs, these stories often contain sinister human and supernatural elements. (I’m attempting to keep this PG.)
These sinister elements often overlap with ancient rituals… Think Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, or an adventure where someone - usually a female is kidnapped and sacrificed to a ‘god,’ or dedicated to darkness.
It doesn’t matter if you don’t believe that the ‘god’ involved is real or not. I’ve been under oppressive relegion which taught me the wrong things. It didn’t matter that they were lies - what mattered is that I felt like I was held captive to them, no matter how much I defied the lies.
Many of these abuse survivors end up in the church. And unfortunately, the Christian church traded authentic for nice a long time ago. And it turned them into wimps. The Christian church often believes that to confront evil is to be contaminated by it.
Dr. Heiser didn’t believe that. His supernatural worldview held the empowering answer to freedom. And that answer?
Well… its pretty awesome… and it deeply appeals to me as a writer who is writing about empowerment in the face of trauma and currently running a blog series: The Hero’s Journey from Trauma to Healing.
The powers of darkness, which held you captive were disarmed. They are disarmed and imprisoned. They can’t hurt you anymore. In fact, it is your task and mission to throw back the darkness wherever you walk. The streets aren’t clean, there’s still too much evil in the world, but you are a fearless immortal imager of God.
Want to know how this works? Read Reversing Hermon. Reversing Hermon: Enoch, the Watchers, and the Forgotten Mission of Jesus Christ (Its not preachy, overtly religious or annoying, I promise.)
That should be Dr. Heiser’s legacy… freedom for captives and speaking truth to lies.
His website for more information is: Dr. Michael Heiser - Biblical Scholar | Author | Semitic Languages Expert
Oh. Since Dr. Heiser loved the original Indiana Jones series, as do I… He’s now a character in my Indiana Jones Fan Fiction The Seven Swords of Diya.
Dr. Heiser’s research is instrumental in this piece, as well as my other upcoming works. (I would have shared something original from my Amazon page if it was ready.)
When you get to heaven Dr. Heiser - go find the Ark of the Covenent. We all know its not in your Seattle, Washington home’s tunnel!
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February 2, 2023
Road of Trials
You’ve heard that the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. That’s true. And each of your decisions makes impact in your life especially how you interact with others.
Today we’re talking about the Road of Trials. In the monomyth this is the section of writing where the heroes/sheroes faces a series of challenges. In quest narratives they usually come in threes. This is the most exciting part of your favorite adventures, and has been throughout the history of storytelling.
This is where Indy goes after the ark stealing it back from the Nazis. This is where the guy in the chick flick realizes he loves the leaving woman and goes bolting through the airport to win her back. This is where the detective knows he’s or she is hot on the trail of the bad guys and even though he or she is facing all kinds of lies and threats - he or she keeps going. This is where the princess rallies the kingdom and goes charging off to fight against darkness.
But in the journey of healing - The Road of Trials doesn’t look like that. Its not fun. Its not exciting. Its like slogging through waist deep mud, both mentally and physically. The only way you can see that you successfully survived the Road of Trials is after its over. And healing isn’t a checklist. Its a life long journey.
Now if that sounds unreasonably gloom, doom, boom - let me assure you its not. You are not going to be stuck on The Road of Trials forever… but there are always new challenges. And as you move along The Road of Trials you’ll gain the skills to take on these new challenges.
Since the Road of Trials is such a large piece of narratives and healing, I’m going to take more time on it because there’s a lot to unpack. So most of February will be The Road of Trials. See you next week!
Perpetual Disclaimer for this series:
I am not a counselor or a mental health professional. I am going to attempt to avoid things which will cause alarm or harm, but I can't know what will trigger each individual. If you need to speak to a mental health professional please know that there are resources available.
Your stories are amazing!
Chronic Writer
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January 26, 2023
Belly of the Whale
The Belly of the Whale metaphor comes from the ancient Biblical story of Jonah. Jonah was a prophet (think preacher or missionary) who was told by God that he needed to give the people of Nineveh a message and he was to leave at once. Jonah packed his bags and went in the opposite direction. He was not interested in the people of Nineveh and would rather have them fall into eternal gloom, doom, boom.
And God was like, “Yo, Jonah - I’m in charge of the whole world. I don’t do that territory stuff like the other gods. (See my post on the threshold here) You can’t escape me by running away from what I’ve called you to do. Its not like I don’t know where you went, dude.”
(Remember what happens when we don’t answer the call to adventure? We become victims. Post is here.)
So Jonah realizes that he’s made an oops… but he doesn’t really do anything about it, until a massive storm comes up and he realizes, “Oh. All these people on the ship are going to die, if I don’t ‘fess up.”
He confesses - and says that the appeasement solution to their problems is to chuck him overboard. And the sailors were like, “Oh… so you’re the guy that the gods are mad at… cool, we don’t have to die.” So they chuck him overboard, and Jonah’s like, “Oh my God! I’m going to drown!”
All modern readers can insert a ‘duh’ here.
And God was like, “Yep, son - you’re gonna die. But not yet… Remember I told you about that city called Nineveh? You ain’t got there yet.”
And the, a ‘big fish’ or a whale - comes and swallows Jonah in a massive gulp.
Jonah sat in the belly of the whale for three days. It’s probably the longest recorded time out in the history of time outs. But then he gets puked out and goes on his way to Nineveh. He delivers God’s message and the people of Ninveh repent to the point where they dress their livestock in mourning clothes. (Which means they are taking this message seriously and recognize that they are way off the acceptable behavior charts and are going to make changes.)
This is a triumph and usually where Sunday school teachers end the story. But there’s more… Jonah gets annoyed and goes out from the city of Nineveh and is like “oh goody - where’s the fireball of judgement, Lord? These people deserve to be toast.”
When no fireball comes, Jonah gets hot and cranky. So God gives him a vine, which provides shade.
Jonah’s reaction: Oh, this is nice. I get shade to watch the fireball of judgement. Where’s the fireball of judgement, Lord?
And then a worm eats the plant and Jonah’s getting hot and cranky again. Jonah reacts with, “Hey where’s the plant? I wanted to be comfy when the fireball of judgement hit! Where’s the fireball of judgement, Lord?”
The book of Jonah ends with God saying, “No, fireball of judgement Jonah. These people repented - they were willing to change. Shouldn’t I give them the same chance as I gave you?”
We don’t get Jonah’s reaction. But I wanted to talk about attitude…
Jonah’s trip in the belly of the whale is his darkest moment. Our darkest moment in the journey to healing is the point where we decide we need to start healing. We look at what’s commonly called ‘rock bottom’ - realize we’re in a dark place, and if it’s the belly of a whale, we’re swimming in sludge and it’s gross. We don’t like where we’re at.However, we should be thankful that the story doesn’t end there. Jonah got out. We got out of those dark places too. Sometimes we’re able to crawl and scrap our way out using the shadow skills, sometimes we look up and there’s a person who’s got battle scars and experience to rescue us, sometimes we get someone equally scrappy thrown in the pit with us and we make it out together.
Jonah got out of the belly of the whale - but he carried that experience with him. He didn’t change the attitude he had. He carried the emotional sludge of that belly of the whale experience with him, instead of processing it. He was so bad at processing his emotional experience that it prevented him from having a joyful moment when the people of Nineveh made the decree that they were going to change.
Emotions are not fun to process, but they need to be processed. It takes courage to realize that you are not stuck in that bad place anymore and then to pursue the life you want beyond that dark place.Don’t carry the emotional sludge. You shouldn’t stink like whale puke when you move on to the next stage of your adventure.In fact, the whale guts smell of emotional sludge will keep you from moving on. The belly of the whale experience is a victory in the idea that - it wasn’t fun - but you won.You won because you survived.And that’s a victory.Perpetual Disclaimer for this series:
I am not a counselor or a mental health professional. I am going to attempt to avoid things which will cause alarm or harm, but I can't know what will trigger each individual. If you need to speak to a mental health professional please know that there are resources available.
Your stories are amazing!
Chronic Writer
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January 19, 2023
The Shadow
If you’ve been following along on our chart of the monomyth - don’t be confused, this step isn’t on the chart. But I thought it was important to talk about.
The shadow personality in pyschology is called a shadow because many people are afriad of it. They view it as a dark and scary part of their soul or mind. This is often because many people don’t understand the role emotions. Emotions are not good or bad - they are biological reactions within the body. And these feelings help us survive, connect with others, feel love and warn us of impending danger.
When trauma happens, these feelings and reactions get mixed up, because trauma puts us into permanant high alert mode. For many of us, this high alert mode destroys us mentally and eventually physically.
The good news is that it was this ‘shadow’ that helped us survive the trauma. The emotions that we were afriad of - became the key to our survival.
You don’t need to be afriad of the Shadow personality… it allowed you to do the vital things which kept you alive.
I view this as like the identity that super heroes have. Their hero identity lets them do things that an average person would not be able to do.
In my love of 1930s pulp detectives I encountered The Shadow. Millionarie Lamont Cranston is also The Shadow, a mysterious crime fighter whom all the gangsters and villians of the city fear deeply. The alternative identity of The Shadow, allows Lamont Cranston to do things his regular, normal person identity wouldn’t.
In our case, The Shadow acts as your coping mechanisms - they help you survive - but they’re not you.
Integrating the shadow’s protective skills through the challenges of confronting and sorting through the events which have happened to you, and the beliefs and experiences which formed you is part of healing. It is not an easy piece of healing - but the processing needs to happen.
Eventually, as you go through this you’ll learn that The Shadow was protecting you. Your survivor shadow was working to keep you alive. The coping mechanisms and the beliefs that came with it were not always healthy but you are able to stand and face the darkness today because they carried you through this. (This does not make your behaviors right or execusible. It just means that you survived and in order to move forward you need to move from surviving, to healing, to thriving.)
As you go through this section of initiation on your journey to healing - you get to look at your survivor and shadow skills.
What needs to happen in this process is that you need to fold your survivor hero protector into the trauma, and walk out of the healing journey whole.
The secret?
You are secretly both Lamont Cranston and The Shadow, just like Superman is also Clark Kent. They are the same person… just as you are survivor and protector to yourself even though they feel or appear as two separate identities.
You don’t need to be afriad of your protector. Trauma can make us feel that way, but in this case - its not true.
You have the skills to go on a healing quest.
Suit up for adventure!
Perpetual Disclaimer for this series:
I am not a counselor or a mental health professional. I am going to attempt to avoid things which will cause alarm or harm, but I can't know what will trigger each individual. If you need to speak to a mental health professional please know that there are resources available.
Your stories are amazing!
Chronic Writer
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January 12, 2023
Seperation & Initiation
Welcome to 2023!
In my review at the beginning of this series, I mentioned that there are three large sections of the monomyth.
They are:
Seperation
Initiation
Return
I said trauma makes us feel seperate from those in the ‘normal’ world. As that seperation becomes mores and more isolating it forces us to answer the call of adventure.
This call to adventure crosses us over the threshhold to the next section: Initiation
An initiation in this case is an event or experience that puts us on a journey toward something bigger. Its the choice we make to start the journey of healing.
This section means we have to go through the difficult things and challenge our beliefs and how we’re been doing life. Its hard, its messy, and it involves rewiring our brains and bodies. But that’s ok… because you’re willing to do the work. Those trials and challenges are going to break the unhealthy rules. It’ll feel dangerous, but the way you’ve been living with your pain and trauma is probably worse and more dangerous than whatever challenges, trauma secrets and beliefs you’re going to face when dealing with the darkness so that you can be healed.
It’s not that you’re wrong or evil person… you’ve developed ways to cope and that’s how you survived and learned how to function.
In some forms of pyschology this is called the shadow personality. We’ll talk about this next week… its not dark and scary, I promise.
Perpetual Disclaimer for this series:
I am not a counselor or a mental health professional. I am going to attempt to avoid things which will cause alarm or harm, but I can't know what will trigger each individual. If you need to speak to a mental health professional please know that there are resources available.
Your stories are amazing!
Chronic Writer
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January 6, 2023
A Belated Christmas Present
Just wanted to give some updates. No bad news here, I promise.
I now have a Goodreads profile.
Goodreads is a social network for writers and readers. Book reviews seem to be the main content.
I’ll be leaving reviews on the books that I use for research as I continue to write and publish. Consider it a teaser library for my upcoming works. That and I’ve been known to get sassy on some of the reviews.
You can friend or follow me: A.R. Mitchell
Bonus Rounds for Goodreads:
If you’re following me on Amazon, I discovered that my follow button isn’t working. Amazon is aware of the problem. However, it can take up to 60 days for a notification.
I publish a short story at least twice a month.
By the time you get your Amazon notification - I’ll have four more books published.
Goodreads? I post a book there - you’ll get notified faster. Plus, you won’t always have to purchase them.
On Amazon if you get a book from a library or other source, you can’t leave a review unless you buy it directly from Amazon. Goodreads - absolutely, post away regardless of story source. I’m looking forward to using this feature for my beta readers.
What’s a beta reader?
A beta reader is a trusted person who is given the honor of reading an author’s finished work. Their job is to catch the errors, plot holes, and character glitches due to multiple writing drafts and world immersion of an over-excited author parent whose book is their latest and greatest child.
Speaking of finished novels:
At the bottom of every post I put links to my work. One of them is Wattpad. Wattpad is an online writing site for serialized fiction of all kinds… including fan written stories, called ‘fan fiction,’ because some of us look at modern movies and say, “That was an epic dumpster fire. I can do better.”
And because we’re writers - we do.
Fan fiction has a sordid reputation for being explicit, poorly written and mostly smut, and yes, I’ve run across that - but my work doesn’t have those things. Family centered adventure with functional relationships is my speciality with nothing over PG-13. The Wattpad audience is mostly teenage girls and they need to see functional families and healthy relationships. (Plus a strong female lead, working with her dad on an adventure that they both love.)
Check out the Indiana Jones adventure, “The Sidenstrasse Tapestry,” and its newly started sequal, “The Seven Swords of Diya.”
You don’t need to be a member of Wattpad to read it. The Sidenstrasse Tapestry: An Indiana Jones Fan-Fiction
Completed Wattpad books can be posted for review on Goodreads… which means: You can drop a review on a free book from me!
(If action adventure isn’t your cup of tea, I completely understand and won’t bug you about it - there’s enough writing genres (types of writing) for everyone to have a favorite.)
Consider it a belated Christmas present. Best wishes in 2023!
Monomyth returns next week - along with references to the 1930s pulp hero, The Shadow.
Here’s the links:
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