DeeDee Lake's Blog, page 4
September 30, 2020
Welcome to the First Next Step For Teens Blog post!
You’re a teen girl, a parent of a teen girl, a coach-mentor-friend-pastor-youth group leader of a teen girl. I’m sure you’ve guessed by now – this is for teen girls!
I’m a bit older now, but still remember the day when I was 17, I accepted Jesus as my Savior and I was expecting something. I wasn’t sure what, but it felt like I should have done more, known more, or at least changed some things.
I didn’t because I didn’t know how. It was deflating trying to figure out the whole Christian thing myself. I wish I had had a mentor to walk me through learning at least the basics.
Is the same true for you?
If…that’s you – hang on! The hope is to write things you’ll like and relate to in this blog. I will post once a week on Tuesdays even though today is Wednesday. I hope you’ll come and hang out and give your opinions. I’d love to hear them.
My book will be out November 5, 2020 just for you. It’s called:
Next Step. You’ve Accepted Jesus…Now What?
Check out my next blog on October 6th. In the meantime you can see who I am at www.deedeelake.com
#connectionexpert
September 25, 2020
3 Steps for Great Communication
Keep it Simple. Take a moment. Breathe. Try to never complicate situations with more than one issue at a time. It is easy to start piling on issues when we get frustrate and have finally reached the point of confrontation. (Extra Tip: Discuss and deal with issues before they become a confrontation.)
Step One
Resist the temptation to pile on. It never goes well. It dilutes the real issue that you needed resolved and it can create an explosive situation that does not address the central problem.
Step Two
The second step in great communication: Clearly and Precisely State Your Expectations. Most often when you find yourself frustrated and angry you have failed to clearly state your expectations and the other person does not have a clue what you needed from them.
Step Three
Third step in great communication: Never Assume.
Don’t believe you have all the answers. Normally, when you think you know everything about a situation you usually don’t.
My Advice:
Always be willing to listen more than you talk.
#communication #relationships https://www.deedeelake.com
September 18, 2020
No Medal for Mad
Did you know that there is no medal for being mad the longest?
That’s right. I’ve searched. I have not found one. It is not an Olympic event nor a Little League sport. Who knew. We all act like it could be one. Often, we proudly announce how long we were mad at our spouse, boss, or parents. As if, someone is going to march up and pin a ribbon on us.
Nope. Not going to happen. No medal. No ribbon. No trophy.
So why do we hang on to mad? It doesn’t do anything for our health. In fact, the way I understand, anger causes our blood pressure to rise. (Please do not take this as medical advice. I have absolutely, no medical training what so ever. None. Zip. Nada)
Mentor’s Words
Years ago, a beautiful mentor told me, as a young wife, she would go long periods of time not speaking to her husband. I could hardly believe her. Her husband, Ken was a saint. He was perfect. Okay. Truthfully. I didn’t know him when he was young and stupid. Just when he was old and wise.
As she grew in her Christian faith, she learned she was not to hold on to her anger. God doesn’t want the sun to go down on our anger. Ephesian 4:26 NLT “. . . Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, “. He wants us to go to someone as soon as we can and work out whatever is causing trouble in the relationship.
She learned that she had to stop her destructive behavior. My mentor was hurting her husband, their marriage and herself. If she waited a week, two days or ten minutes to resolve their disagreement it would still need to be resolved and the same steps would still need to be taken. So, why wait? Why spend any more time in frustration and anger than necessary?
Why Wait?
That’s God’s point too. Why wait? Do we just want to be mad? Is it our desire to just sit in our fit? Ever watch a two-year-old decide to be mad for some random reason? It is funny until it isn’t. We are just grown-up versions of that when we refuse to go work things out with someone.
You don’t have to be the one that caused the problem, but you can be the one who causes the resolution. Relationships are worth hard conversations. The truth is the quicker you deal with misunderstands, disagreements, arguments, and any other relational issues the easier they are to resolve.
Make it a habit to always work it out. Start today. Start with small stuff. Don’t hesitate.
My Advice
Decide that you, your family, friends, and workplace will be known for fighting FOR relationships. For that, you DO deserve a medal!
#communication #ConnectionExpert https://www.deedeelake.com
September 17, 2020
“Where the Crawdads Sing” by Delia Owens
I devoured the book in two days. It is an amazing glimpse back into a time in the south. I’m from southern parents and have lived for many years in the south. Now, I live in Colorado and miss the feelings and smells of the south.
Delia helped me remember in detail the sounds and smells of the south-land. Home.
As you read Where the Crawdads Sing you are immersed in the story. The characters are so real they stay with you long after the last page.
Delia Owens is a new favorite author of mine. Take a stay-cation and spend some time Where the Crawdads Sing.
You’ll be glad you did!
Hands Full by Brooke Ellen Frick
First time author, Brooke Frick is transparent, real, and godly in her new book, Hands Full. It is a devotional for busy moms and boy is she busy. She has five kiddos – you can see them on the cover of her book.
Shout out to Carrie Dennis who did the beautiful cover. She captured a sweet childhood moment. I love it!
Brooke could be the next Beth Moore of her generation. She sees God in places where many just want to wallow in the mess. I’ve purchased several copies to give as gifts.
Every new mom should have a copy of Hands Full by Brooke Frick.
#HandsFull
September 15, 2020
Super (Mom) Woman!
“Super (Mom) Woman”
You ever wonder how some people seem to accomplish so much in their lives? Does God slip them some extra hours while the rest of us are sleeping? Maybe, He sends a cleaning crew over to knock out the housework and laundry while the family is out running errands. Hmm?
Paradise
I once lived in a place that was close to paradise. Panama, right on the Panama Canal. We had a maid/nanny, a gardener and a seamstress who all came to our house. I’m not sure if that would be in the dictionary as paradise but for me it was as close to paradise as I’ll get this side of heaven.
It amused me when someone station there would say they didn’t their wife to have help and become used to it. Believe me when we moved stateside the reality of dishes in the sink, crying babies, knee-high grass, and all my clothes being bought at Target – I woke up to real-life in a hurry.
“Reality” returns
With our three-year-old daughter, dog, my husband in yet another army course, we moved into a house three times the size of our tight military quarters in Panama. To add to the reality of life, within months of moving back to the U.S., we adopted our highly active son. Yeah, my “vacation” from chores was over. It was time for me to don my Superwoman persona and get busy.
I was back to my real world of full-time wife, mommy, maid, gardener, home-school teacher, taxi driver, seamstress, entertainment organizer, head cheerleader, boo-boo fixer. God, marriage, family, and church all took priorities.
Who’s first?
God comes first. Husband second. Kids next. Relationships always trumps laundry. Order over chaos in relationships and home life. When your home is neat and tidy, usually, there is less stress on the relationships.
I have yet to be at a funeral where everyone spoke highly of how godly a woman kept her floors. I long to leave a legacy of loving people and letting them know how much they are valued.
My Advice
Remember to keep the correct order in your life to keep chaos at bay. God first, husband second, children next and then the rest of the world.
For the ones that count in your life you will be their Super (Mom) Woman!
#TheConnectionExpert https://www.deedeelake.com
September 12, 2020
Linger a Little Longer
It’s late. I like to write in the evening. Sometimes I linger over my journal and wait to hear what God is trying to tell me. On this night, our house is quiet, I sit back and listen to the soft jazzy music streaming from my computer and remember the beginning of the day.
Before the dogs needed attention or the coffee was brewed, or before our three-year-old, precious granddaughter opened her eyes, I gazed at her sweet face and waited for her to wake. Our little giggly, girly-girl had spent the night and would want our full attention later when we played imaginary games with her.
Sweet Face
Before the house became completely alive, when it was just God and me sharing a moment of peace, I knew joy. It was that kind of moment that made me want the clock to slow down so I could soak in the love and joy I felt watching her sweet face.
She woke and stared at me with those big beautiful eyes of hers. My heart melted. We planned to spend the day together and she wanted it to start immediately. The first item on her “to do” list was some serious tickling and giggling.
We drank hot tea and ate scones (a.k.a. vanilla wafers). We had a beautiful tea party with real teacups. Today was a day well lived. The day was full of love, giggles, and plenty of cuddles.
A Day Well Spent
It was a busy day, a sweet day. It was time well spent. Time with my husband and our little three-year-old granddaughter. I wish every day could be well spent, a day with the Lord, with family, helping a friend, praying for someone in need, doing ministry, and moving forward in goals. If I could choose, every day would be filled with laughter and chatting. Wouldn’t that be great? Sometimes we need to linger. God wants to spend time with us just like we did with our little cutie.
Linger with God
God wants us to know, he stares at our faces too. He wants us to feel His arms around us and our lives. He wants us to linger a little longer.
Chat a little more. Read His word aloud, letting Him hear His words on our lips. We are in a relationship with Him. He wants our time and attention. Take a moment, or two, relax at the Saviors feet. Join Him and breathe in life with Christ. It is good. He is good. Take all your worries, cares and concerns straight to Jesus. He is waiting to have you give them all to Him.
1 Peter 5:7 says it is so. “Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.”
My Advice
Rest a little longer. The world will still be outside the door. You will be stronger for having spent time with the Lord. Be Blessed today.
#ConnectionExpert
