Jennifer Wake's Blog, page 6

El Shaddai: The All-Sufficient One

El Shaddai, the all-sufficient One.

You are powerful.

You are stronger than anything we face.

Breathe Your strength into us.

You are omnipotent.

You are stronger than children’s temper tantrums and my loneliness.

You are peace, which strengthens me against toxic leaders.

You are stronger than people who rise against me.

You created time and space.

You create the waves in the ocean.

You are the God who has been, who is, and always will be.

Your breath gives us power and life.

El Shaddai, breathe Your strength into us.

Breathe Your power into us.

Breathe Your peace into us.

El Shaddai, breathe on us.

Amen.

Photo by Chris Chan on Unsplash

Walking a Volksmarch

Why do leaves change colors in the fall? Why do they fall to the ground? Why don’t all of them fall at once? Why….

The questions kept coming as we walked through the woods. Each step brought another question—questions about everything around us.

When we PCSed to Germany in January, we decided to experience as many German traditions as possible. Unfortunately, my husband’s unit kept him very busy with training exercises, classes, and preparations for the upcoming deployment. The seasons rolled by, and I started to believe I would be stuck indefinitely in our high-rise apartment with three kids under seven. Rapunzel had nothing on me except for the long hair.

When my mom came to visit, she refused to let me stay inside. She loved to walk, especially volksmarching, and she encouraged me to find a local volksmarch. Every weekend there are volksmarches all over Germany. I had to figure out how to drive us to a nearby town.

A Volksmarch is a fun walk, not a competitive race. It usually has two lengths–five or ten kilometers (3.1 or 6.2 miles). The goal is to enjoy the path and the time with friends, family, or yourself. The route begins and ends at the same place, which usually has a Biergarten. Germans enjoy the fresh air and then linger at the Biergarten, imbibing the local brew and food.

As we started our five kilometer walk through the woods, the questions began raining down. My eldest, Rachel, started asking questions nonstop for the first two kilometers. Like most six-year-olds, she loved to ask questions and figure out how things worked. The falling leaves fascinated her. While I pushed the double stroller with Dena and Andrew, she skipped around us, picking up leaves. Dena would pick a color, and Rachel would bring back at least two, usually twenty, leaves of that color to drop on top of Dena.

In the third kilometer, she slowed down; skipping turned into walking, and asking turned into listening. We talked about the leaves and the trees we were seeing. My mother knew from the leaves the type of trees–maples, hickory, elm, birch. There were some she wasn’t familiar with; Rachel placed those leaves in Andrew’s lap to take back home so Grandma could find out.

Dena loved all the different colors. She wondered why some leaves with the same shape were different colors. “Why different colors, Grandma?”

My mother explained that nutrients in the ground, rainfall, and the amount of sunlight can change the colors of the leaves. She used terms a two-year-old could understand. Dena giggled, thinking about what color she would like to be after eating different foods.

We passed kilometers four and five with discussions about fall and how God designed plants to change for winter. Fir trees full of needles and cones were discussed. Bushes glowing with red leaves and bright berries reminded Rachel of the story of Moses and the burning bush.

After we finished our volksmarch, we enjoyed some traditional German refreshments. All the kids ate bratwurst. Dena decided her hair was like leaves so that it would become redder. Rachel did not think hair worked like leaves, but she liked the idea of red hair.

I marveled at how embracing a German tradition could turn into a science lesson, vast piles of leaves, and stories of God’s faithfulness. Volksmarches became a monthly outing, sometimes with friends, Grandma, or Daddy. What are your fun traditions? How might you incorporate God’s faithfulness into the things you already enjoy doing as a family?

Yahweh Tsuri: The Lord Is My Rock

Based on Psalm 18:1-3

I love You, Yahweh Tsuri, my strength.

You provide me with the strength to get up every morning.

When I miss my parents, You give me strength to rise and face the day.

When I miss my babies, You hold them in Your hands,

And You give me the strength to share my story and help women with their loss.

Yahweh Tsuri, the Lord is my rock, my fortress, and my deliverer.

You save me from the storms swirling around me, ready to overwhelm me.

You protect me from the attacks of the enemy.

You deliver me from the doubts that pursue me night and day.

Yahweh Tsuri, You are my rock, fortress, and deliverer.

May my family take refuge in Yahweh Tsuri; You are my shelter.

May they hide under Your mighty wings, a haven during times of storms.

You are a harbor for people in the hurricane of hurt.

You are my shield; I hide behind you to avoid the darts of the enemy.

You surround me–in front, behind, above, and below me.

I call upon Yahweh Tsuri, who is worthy to be praised.

You are the creator, the Lord over all.

You are above all and in everything.

You save me from my enemies.

You are worthy of all praise.

Amen

Photo by Maxim Boldyrev on Unsplash

Other Ideas to Help Pay for College

For the past few weeks, we have been talking about saving for college. Yet many of my friends and family did not save for college or save enough for college. No matter how much you have saved for college, your student can work to help pay for their college.

After filling out the FAFSA forms at studentaid.gov, your student will receive an offer of financial aid from the colleges they have applied to. They can appeal the offer and see if they can receive more financial aid. But beware of student loans. They can be part of the “package” a college offers students. You can refuse loans.

Students can apply for grants and scholarships. One of my friends had her students spend 10-20 hours a week applying for grants and scholarships instead of working a part-time job. Unlike loans, grants and scholarships do not have to be paid back. They can be found in many places. The main difference between the two is need. Grants are given out of need, while scholarships can be given based on need or other criteria. Two great websites are scholarships.com and fastweb.com. If you are a military family, another great place to start is search.militaryscholar.org which the Fisher House Foundation runs. Look for scholarships from local groups like spouses, clubs on military bases, or clubs that interest your student.

A great way to save money is to take required core classes at local community colleges. This is key if your student is attending an in-state school. Many schools will accept community college classes from their state. Taking community college classes during the summers or while living at home can save thousands of dollars. Once you are at college, take as many classes as possible each semester since many universities have a “full-time” status which means three to four classes. But if your student can handle four to five classes, the university may not charge for the extra ones. That allows your student to complete their coursework sooner.

All of these can help save you and your student thousands of dollars. But don’t forget also to have your student be creative with ways to raise money to pay for their food and other costs. Think about their skills. Do they like to work with kids? Pets? Teach something? Tutor? Could they deliver food? Think creatively. Apply for paid internships during the summer as well as the school year.

I know one thing that may not be popular is having your student live with you. That certainly comes with its own challenges. Some students can handle living at home; others desire independence.

Things to avoid. Taking out loans. Try to avoid loans since they can cause the student not to be able to get out from under the loans. Now I want to share my opinion about taking money out of retirement accounts to pay for college. I don’t recommend it. No one will pay for your retirement. Your student needs to find ways to pay for college or possibly postpone college and get a job to save for it. Taking money out of your ROTH is allowed to pay for college, but I don’t advise it.

As you look to the future, planning is key to success. Each Friday, we will explore finances, and I pray you will ask me questions and engage others in what you learn. What are other ways you have paid for college?

UTMA/UGMA means what?

“UTMA” or “UGMA” looks like something the military might use to communicate about an operation. It is actually a way to save money for a child’s future. A few weeks ago, we started looking at savings for college using savings accounts and savings bonds (check out https://www.jenniferwake.com/post/two-ways-to-save-for-college). Then we looked at ESA and 529s ( https://www.jenniferwake.com/post/saving-for-college). As I shared last week, my husband and I made many mistakes, but I learned a lot, and I hope I can help you avoid some of them.

As a mom of three adult children, I made many financial mistakes trying to save for their future. One important thing I learned was how much you save for college is important, but how you save it will impact financial aid in the future. There are many different “vehicles” to build college money. Some are tax-advantaged, meaning you don’t pay taxes on the money if it is used for educational purposes. Unfortunately, if your student chooses not to go to school and wants to use the money for some other purpose, there will be taxes and penalties. One vehicle that is taxed is a UTMA/UGMA.

UTMA/UGMA stands for Uniformed Transfer to Minor Act or the Uniformed Gift to Minor Act. The main difference between them is the type of assets. UGMA can hold only money and securities (think stocks), while the UTMA can have other types of property (i.e., real estate, precious metals, fine art, or intellectual property). Since we did not own any special property to give to our kids, we used a UGMA. An adult sets up the account and controls it until the child turns eighteen. Once the child turns eighteen, they control the account and can use it however they want.

This is not designated as a tax-advantaged education account. It can be used for anything, and any withdrawal will be taxed. Since this account is the child’s property, it will greatly impact financial aid. These types of accounts cannot be transferred between beneficiaries. Each college will look at UTMA/UGMA as the student’s asset, which will be used before the college gives any financial aid to the student.

When I set up the UGMA for my children, I did not understand that it would cause them to be taxed every year they had “unearned income.” Unearned income is income from dividends, capital gain distributions, and interest. Capital gains are usually the profits from the sale of stocks. Dividends are the share of profits by companies. Interest is what companies pay to encourage people to save. When my kids started having “unearned income,” the first $1250 was not taxed, but the next $1250 was taxed at the child’s tax rate. Anything above that $2500 is taxed at our tax rate, which is called “The Kiddie Tax.”

Because of the way I saved, my kids were taxed, and they lost opportunities for scholarships and grants. I did not know the way I saved was as important as how much I saved. If I could only go back…

As you look to the future, planning is key to success. The website saveandinvest.org has a wonderful chart summarizing your choices. On their website is a good pamphlet called “Smart Savings for College—Buy Better Degrees,” which you can download in a PDF format. Each Friday, we will explore finances, and I pray you will ask me questions and engage others in what you learn.

El Gibbor: Mighty Warrior God

Isaiah 9:6

El Gibbor, Mighty Warrior God! I cry out to You! I need You, Lord!

The orders came down so suddenly that I don’t know how to handle them.

He leaves in the morning; he is packing while I am trying to figure out my world.

Help me, El Gibbor! I need Your strength, Your wisdom, and especially Your peace.

El Gibbor, please be with my child! Why do these things happen when he is gone?

My child is so far away from me, yet she needs me and her father.

No, she needs You. She needs Your comfort, Your clarity, and Your protection.

Lord, send people to help her during this car crash.

I know You are with her, but she needs to feel Your presence.

Mighty Warrior God, I need you to be with my husband.

He is worried as he is across the world from us.

Be his shield, and have his back.

Protect him from distractions, commotions, diversions, and preoccupations.

Keep him focused on his mission and his team’s well-being.

El Gibbor, my Mighty Warrior God, I need you to be with me.

My pillow is full of tears, and my mind swirls with dreams of catastrophe.

Remind me, minute by minute, that You are with me.

Help me to walk in peace and tranquility.

Protect me from the flaming arrows of Satan.

El Gibbor sustain me in the fight for my children and my family.

Remind me to pray without ceasing, to lift up my husband while he is in harm’s way.

Remind me to give thanks in all circumstances, whether good or bad.

Help me remind my family of Your faithfulness and power daily.

El Gibbor, my Mighty God, be with us.

Amen

What if?

“What if the bus driver forgets her route? What if she decides not to stop to pick up my daughter? What if they did not do a background check and the driver is a serial child abductor?”

As that last question came out of my mouth, my friend started laughing. Not a quiet, polite giggle but an all-out, “wet yourself” laughing fit. After several minutes she finally could breathe again and asked, “Really, Jennifer?”

How is ‘my first child riding the bus across a military base to school without me to protect her’ a laughing matter?

She continued, “Didn’t you just teach us about trusting God with everything over the summer?”

“Yes, everything but not my child…”

As the words came out, I realized how hypocritical I was. I was willing to trust God with my day-to-day needs, even my life, but I wasn’t willing to trust the God of creation, the one who knit my daughter together in my womb, with her being out of my sight.

God wants us to trust Him. In the trials, in the good times, in the darkness, and in the light. He wants me to trust Him with my marriage, my husband, who was at that time training to deploy, my house, and my family, including my five-year-old daughter. But wait, God… Didn’t You listen? I need to protect and care for her and ensure she is always safe.

After all these years, this trust issue causes me to stumble in my relationship with God. My kids are now adults, but… But they need me. I need to protect them, help them, and care for them. Did you see that change?

It started with “they need me,” then it quickly changed to “I need them.” Parenting never ends, but our relationship with our children must change. They get to make their own decisions, the good, the bad, and the really bad.

Two of my three are across the country from me. I can’t be there instantly when they fall, their cars break down, or they get the flu. Yet that is my heart’s desire. So, to my knees, I go. Every day, sometimes every hour, to lift them up to their Heavenly Father, who loves them more than I ever can. His love is eternal, unconditional, deeper, richer, and stronger than I can imagine.

They may meet a mean bus driver or crazy drivers on the highways. They may encounter people who manipulate them, steal from them, or lie to them. They may get sick or have to move when their landlord sells their apartment. Yet God, as only He can be, is with them every single second of each day. Sometimes they will claim they did everything on their own, but other times they will acknowledge how God intervened. In the latter, my heart rejoices with their recognition of His power, presence, and protection in their lives.

As I look back on those days of the “psycho bus driver” taking my daughter, I can now laugh. I still worry, but the more I pray and trust God, the easier it becomes. I am constantly reminded to trust God. What do you need to give to God and trust Him to handle?

Saving for College using ESA or 529

How much you save for college is important, but how you save it will impact financial aid in the future. There are many different ways to save for college. Over these next few weeks, we will look at some of the ways to save for college, which can help. Previously we looked at savings accounts and Savings Bonds. ( https://www.jenniferwake.com/post/two-ways-to-save-for-college )

The third way you could save is to open a Coverdell Education Savings Account (ESA). ESA are funds that can be used for higher education or private education K-12. The yearly cap for contributions is $ 2,000 per child. This means that if grandparents, aunts, and uncles give gifts towards education, only $2,000 total each year can be put into an ESA for each child. This is not very much, but it can add up to possibly a semester or two in college if invested aggressively.

The money in ESAs can be used for tuition, fees, books, supplies, equipment, and special needs equipment. If the student is attending at least half-time, it can be used for room and board. Contributions are allowed until age 18; all money must be spent by age 30. ESAs have limitations, but using them to pay for private high school or supplies for college makes them a good “vehicle” to save with.

A fourth option is to open either a 529 college savings account or a 529 prepaid tuition account. These are state-run plans. Each state and the District of Columbia have their own plan or plans. Some states use other states’ plans to help cut back on administrative costs.

These plans come in two styles.

The first is a prepaid tuition plan. You pay for an in-state public college tuition at today’s rates. This type of plan is used to force you to choose the college your child will attend. If you are a diehard University of Alabama alumni, your child may acquire your love of the “Crimson Tide,” or they may not. If your child chooses not to attend your college, most of the time, you can move it into the college savings plan.

The 529 college savings plan allows you to invest money into mutual funds. The earnings grow tax-deferred and are tax-free if used for qualified education expenses. When you withdraw money from the 529, it should be sent directly to the school. The school uses that money to pay for qualified expenses, which include tuition, fees, books, supplies, equipment, and special needs services. It can be used to pay for room and board for students who attend at least half-time. These plans can be transferred to another person (i.e., if your first child gets a full scholarship, you can transfer their 529 to a sibling or a cousin). You do not have to be a resident of a state to choose their 529 plan.

Don’t forget about the website saveandinvest.org and its wonderful chart summarizing your choices. On their website is a good pamphlet called “Smart Savings for College—Buy Better Degrees,” which you can download. If you decide to go with a 529 plan, you can go to savingforcollege.com and find tools to compare plans between states.

El Emet: God of Truth

Psalm 31:1-5

Oh Lord, how majestic is your name!

El Emet, God of Truth. You are firm, reliable, and trustworthy!

You are faithful and unchangeable, and You are the Truth!

What You have said will come to pass in Your perfect time!

When I doubt, remind me You are Truth!

When I am scared, remind me You are my firm foundation!

In the darkest times, remind me You are with me, and show me Your light!

When storms threaten to overwhelm me, remind me You are my Rock!

Society deceives my children; instruct me how to show them Your Truth.

When my kids are walking down paths of half-truths and confusion,

El Emet, please bring them back to You.

Draw them with Your unchangeable love and absolute Truth.

When my family and friends need You, send me to shine Your light.

May my words show people You are the Truth and draw them to You to show them Your love.

Guard my mouth and heart so whatever comes out will please You.

Oh, El Emet, don’t let me step onto the twisted paths of lies surrounding me.

El Emet, take my children out of the snares of the evil one.

Protect them from this world.

Be their refuge amid storms.

Redeem them, Lord, bring them back to Your family.

Amen

How to Save for College: One family's journey

“Congratulations on your baby! Remember, they grow so fast!”

So many people said this to me. After the initial afterglow of birth comes the day to day raising of each precious baby, and yes, those days pass quickly. Before I knew it, they entered high school, and we had to figure out college or post-high school education. Eighteen years can pass in the blink of an eye. Unfortunately, the cost of college continues to climb ever faster.

In approximately 220 months after birth, many children will enter college or start on a post-secondary education degree of some type. Only 220 months… with the average cost of college currently around $30,000 a year, you have to save $545 per month per child. Not really; it is about $730 per month because college costs are rising faster than most investments. Aren’t I full of hopeful information? When my kids were little, we did not know how to save for their future plans.

My husband and I made many mistakes. Over the next few weeks, I hope to share some of what we learned and encourage you that hope is not lost. Each Friday, we will explore finances, and I pray you will ask me questions and engage others in what you learn.

As a mom of three adult children, I made many financial mistakes trying to save for their future. One important thing I learned was how much you save for college is important, but how you save it will impact financial aid in the future.

There are many different “vehicles” to build college money. Some are tax-advantaged, meaning you don’t pay taxes on the money if it is used for educational purposes. Unfortunately, if your student chooses not to go to school and wants to use the money for other purposes, there will be taxes and penalties. Other “vehicles” are not tax-advantaged, meaning they are taxed when used, no matter how you spend the money.

One of the easiest ways to start is by opening a plain savings account at a bank in the child’s name. You will have control for a while, but it is in their name, so when they turn eighteen, they can do whatever they want with the money. It is at a bank earning very little interest, which means you are actually losing ground on saving for college. We put $10 a month into a savings account for each child. This account was what we used to buy dorm supplies and computers, pay the initial deposit to attend, etc.

Another easy way to save is by buying savings bonds. These bonds come with many restrictions and rules. They do not grow as fast as many investments but usually have better interest rates than savings accounts. Each bond has a maturity date. This means that if you use them before that date, you will not receive the full value of the investment.

As you look to the future, planning is key to success. The website www.saveandinvest.org has a wonderful chart summarizing your choices. On their website is a good pamphlet called “Smart Savings for College—Buy Better Degrees,” which you can download in a PDF format.

Next week, we will continue this journey of missteps by looking at Coverdell Accounts. Don’t start panicking over all the choices. Please stick with me even if you haven’t started yet; I also have some helpful hints for you. We will wander down this path slowly; we want to savor every minute because they grow up too fast.