Martin Holman Jr.'s Blog

What is Spiritual Deconstruction, Part 5

Here are part 1, part 2, part 3, and part 4 of this series.

In Revelation 7, the author writes:

“After this I saw a vast crowd, too great to count, from every nation and tribe and people and language, standing in front of the throne and before the Lamb. They were clothed in white robes and held palm branches in their hands. And they were shouting with a great roar, “Salvation comes from our God who sits on the throne and from the Lamb!” And all the angels were standing around the throne and around the elders and the four living beings. And they fell before the throne with their faces to the ground and worshiped God. They sang, “Amen! Blessing and glory and wisdom and thanksgiving and honor and power and strength belong to our God forever and ever! Amen.”

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It’s a huge worship service, of a vast crowd, too great to count, and everyone is standing around worshiping Jesus.  Scripture doesn’t say that there is a Promise Keepers logo or a Billy Graham Crusade happening or even K-love  rebroadcasting the events. It’s simply a large group of people worshiping Jesus, and that is all.

When I think about this happening in todays age, I can’t really fathom it.  My friend Nathan believes it can.  He’s much younger than me, and when he mentions it, which is quite often, I chuckle and tell him I agree, but admittedly I am a double minded man at this point.  My voice agrees, but my mind thinks he’s crazy.  Churches and denominations can’t even let go of their own logos much less allow people to go to a Worship service where they can’t get an accurate people count and the pastor doesn’t know what the worship team is going to sing about or what the speaker is going to preach about.

What will the theology be?  What creed will they be using?  Will they introduce heresies?  Will the worship leader’s jeans be too tight?  No church member of mine is going to that gathering!

Of course I’m making light of what will no doubt be a very serious and wonderful event, however, we as humanity, don’t have a great track record when it comes to seeing the things of God…or even God…when He shows up in our vicinity.  It’s like we know what we should be doing, but because of the cards dealt us, or the systems we’ve been handed, we talk about doing the right things, and then don’t.

It is in that “And then don’t” line that those who are deconstructing step in and attempt to figure out why we do certain things in the Western Church. So with part 5 of this series, I’d like to explore what makes someone a Christian and what does not.  This is for certain a precarious scenario to put myself as it’s possible I could end up writing some form of heresy if I’m not careful, and truthfully, I’m not always that careful.    I don’t mean in regards to theology or reading the Bible or following Jesus, but more like in my personality.  I am very loose, sometimes unorganized, and often times not as detailed as I should be, at least in my own mind.

The reason this is important is because usually when it comes to an important topic, I’ll break it down into bite sized pieces and find the lowest common denominator between people groups.  Many people interested in theology, and maybe even you, do not look at answers in Scripture in such ways.  You might haggle and research and tear apart verses and words in different languages until you come to an understanding. Even many deconstructors (I know, it sounds like a Hasbro cartoon) parse the Bible this way, and still come to the understanding they do.

So what do we make of such things?  How do we build unity in light of the fact that we think so differently about so many things?

Here’s one suggestion that just might work for many of us regarding unity:  Focus on the Epistles when it comes to your own life, and the gospels when it comes to others.

Your read that right.

Listen, there is no clear cut way to read Scripture.  It’s not like Paul was saying, “read the gospels and thats how you act, and then when it comes to church life, read my letters.” But that’s kind of how we have come to process the New Testament, and of course, in processing that way, we have divided (combined with the freedoms we enjoy in America) into 1000 different groups and denominations.  But in the end according to Scripture, we all come together.  If that sounds impossible, what do we do about that?

How about we put the pressure of living the directions of Paul on our own individual lives?  In other words, “I need to act this way personally”, and then when it comes to others, we say, “As a Christian, act like Jesus.”

I say this understanding that this is only a temporary solution, but here’s what I know that is reflected in most of our lives.  We like to put high standards on others, and give ourselves a whole lot of freaking grace.  Only a few certain types like Michael Jordan and Tom Brady do the opposite.  But most of us go after others with boat loads of expectations and offer ourselves the grace of Jesus, exactly as we are supposed to.

But what if we offered the grace of Jesus to others, and asked them to simply act like Jesus in word and deed.  The other ways we can act like Jesus is by being the harshest we can be to uptight spiritual leaders who cast judgment like it is their jobs.  And I don’t mean in a passive aggressive way.  I mean take people who use manipulation and judgment and spirituality as a weapon and tell call them “white washed tombs and a brood of vipers”.

And on ourselves, we go hog wild on the sanctification route.  We work hard at being like Jesus and expecting great things on the way we live, communicate, and sacrifice.  We study and learn and teach people to be like Jesus, but no one out works us when it comes to sanctification, and in the process, we become as God has created us.  But we must be careful in that transition that we too, don’t become those people we judged (like Jesus did) by staying humble and spirit filled.

The reason this might be a good idea is because of the amount of Christian leaders who are so black and white on their philosophy, yet who we find later engage in moral failures, many times in ways they have preached against from stage.  Sexual sin, materialism, hiding child abuse, misuse of power and gluttony are just a few examples of ways that Christian leaders have fallen and ignored their own sins while harping on other cultural sins.

Staff members and families who have given most of their lives to the church are then left hanging by a thread and wondering why they gave so much.  This happens enough times and you develop a culture of people who begin to deconstruct their faith, and certain parts of Christianity look a lot like a pile of hypocritical crap.

I want unity.  I want to be totally okay if someone in my church decides to go to another church.  I want to be okay with people who begin to question God, because I believe He’s big enough and good enough to handle it.  So let us lay our lives down, not for our organization or for a good leader, but for Jesus.  If that also means I must lay down some preferences and even some “really strong Christian thoughts”, then that’s what I have to do.  As long as I believe this:

The gospel is the royal announcement that the crucified and risen Jesus, who died for our sins and rose again according to the scriptures has been enthroned as the true Lord of the world.  So as a result of this, we are called to salvation, out of sheer grace, leading others to repentance and faith in Jesus Christ as the risen Lord.

What is Spiritual Deconstruction, Part 4

Here is Part 1, Part 2, and Part 3 of this series.

I said this in part 3:  “I have friends who are gay. (I know immediately I’m stepping on a landmine here, so if I’ve written something wrong in that sentence, my apologies.)  Without debating the rightness or wrongness of that, I have to confess that it is easier for me to make friends with people who I meet as gay or lesbian than it is for me to not judge someone who I know as straight and then changes during the time I know them.”

I don’t think I’m alone here.  We struggle with perceiving change in people who we know to be one way, and then transform into something else.  This includes physical appearance, issues of sexuality, spiritual background, and even when someone “starts attending a different church.”

The reason I bring this up here in this series is because of why it actually happens.  Why do I have difficulty with people changing while I know them when I don’t have difficulty meeting and engaging someone who is already like that when I met them?  As I think about it, the answer is disturbingly simple, and I regret even bringing it up, because it shows a hole in the Christian cultures we have created.

Let me start with this story.  I’ve been working on my autobiography over the last few years.  I plan to release it when I turn 50. As I wrote, I began with my time in Fremont, Ohio and thought about the community built at Fremont Baptist Temple.  My dad was the pastor and he is a master builder of community.  The communities that were created there in Northwest Ohio were among the best communities of people I’ve ever experienced even to this day.  But I thought of something as I’ve been writing that Facebook helped me to process:  Even though it was a great community of people, the amount of people who ‘disappeared’ during that time is shocking.  They were a part of that community, and then they were not.  Until Facebook really became mainstream, I never really thought about some of those people again.

It’s not they they were kicked out of the church (In most cases), and in many cases, they didn’t leave the church as a whole.  They just went to other churches and decided to ‘switch communities’.  And of course, others left church all together.

Prior to the turn of the century, it was easy to ignore someone who changed and became something different.  Social media has turned that opportunity on its head.  We can no longer ignore divisions among us, in church or outside of church.  We can choose to unfollow or unfriend but others have that same information, so key differences shine bright in front of us now, instead of going the way of ignorance.

I bring this up because its important how we deal with differences now, especially if you want to be seen as a person of character.  We can no longer just shove someone out of our communities if they differ with the pastor or if they become transgender or if they decide to walk away from their faith or the faith of the church.

So why do I struggle when someone in my circle changes in some way, including someone who is deconstructing?  Because inside, I look it it as an affront to me and the things I believe and the culture I’ve chosen.  I don’t view someone who was never in my culture as someone who has chosen something else even though they have chosen something else because it’s not about me in that case.  When someone leaves my church or if someone I know turns gay when before they weren’t or if someone chooses to deconstruct their faith, when before they believed what I believe, they have essentially decided that the life I have chosen is not good enough for them.

The reason this happens (especially with pastors and including Christians) is because many of our relationships have become transactional.  We hang out with people who transact with us instead of with people who we love and care for.  If they go to our church and if they give and if they believe a certain thing, then we spend time with them and they are worthy of our time.  We pour into those who can do something for us, and therefore have a plethora of transactional relationships only.

The same thing is not true, however, when we start talking about people who are not naturally a part of our present cultures.  We think of them as people that can possibly come into our cultures though.  We think of them of them as people who can eventually become a part of our church or our inner circle or who can volunteer in places where we have need.  We think of them as someone who can be evangelized.

So what can we do about this?  Alas, it is scary at how most of our American relationships even outside of the church are transactional.  It is almost a part of who we are and probably has something to do with the long voyage the Europeans used to get here, and then their need to rely on others (thus the transactional part) as they populated the mainland of the United States.  So it’s not just a church thing, but transactional is exactly what are relationships are not supposed to be in the church.

So I arrive back at the gospel.

“The gospel is the royal announcement that the crucified and risen Jesus, who died for our sins and rose again according to the scriptures has been enthroned as the true Lord of the world.  So as a result of this, we are called to salvation, out of sheer grace, leading us to repentance and faith in Jesus Christ as the risen Lord.“

That is not transactional.  He died for our sins and rose again according to the Scriptures.  We are called to salvation and choose by his grace to be led to repentance and faith in Jesus.  He chose to do this even though Judas betrayed him and Peter denied him and most of his followers fled like ants after my 5 year old steps on the hill.  He chose to do this even though many Christians routinely fall back into repeated sin.  He chose to do this even though you and I mess up royally!  That is not transactional.

And yet pastors (including this one) get pissed when someone chooses to go to another body of believers.

Or parents push away their children who choose a different lifestyle than they had foreseen for their aspiring geniuses.

Or church members walk away from other friend believers who start to deconstruct their faith (or even spiritually minimalize in some cases, because they are “not who they used to be.”

Some years ago, a lady told me a story I’m going to do my best to recall.  She told me after a few years in her marriage, that she started drinking and rebelling.  She was brought up in a very fundamentalist environment and because of some struggles with mental illness, she had moments of extreme lashing out in terms of drinking and fighting with her pastor husband of 5-7 years.  She started going to local bars and staying away from church for months at a time.  Her husband obviously had trouble with this, but there wasn’t much he could do.  Over time, she met this guy at a bar and they started talking and eventually had an affair of sorts.  The man worked in one state and lived in another state 1000 miles away.  He went home, and soon, she followed him there, much to the dismay of the pastor with small kids at home.

Shortly into her stay with the man 1000 miles away, the woman’s mental illness started acting up.  She went berserk (my words, not hers) and the man from 1000 miles away didn’t know what to do. He reluctantly called her husband and told him to come get her.  She needed help.  So the pastor husband, straight out of the Old Testament story of Hosea, obtained childcare, and drove 1000 miles to the place his wife stayed.  He walked into the house of the man who slept with his wife, he picked her up off the couch where she lay sullen and meek and crying, and he took her home.

This is the kind of love we as Christians are called to give to people, both who we like and who hurt us.  It is a distinct mark of someone who believes the gospel (good news of Jesus) and lives it out.  It is not easy, and I by no means am perfect when it comes to this.  Even now, I’m struggling with some real bitterness I have about a disgruntled neighbor, who I paint as a jerk and a psycho.

But using the power you have (or even your own self confidence) for more power or to get even is the exact opposite thing we should be doing to usher in the Kingdom of God.  We don’t use our power for more of our own strength.  We use our weakness for His strength, and it is then that we can recreate the world around us and stop it from going the way of ‘survival of the fittest’.  If you hate the teaching of evolution, don’t give in to it’s most base value by stomping out your enemies.  Create the world Jesus showed us we could create by loving your enemies and those who change right in front of you, even if it makes you uncomfortable at times.

There is no better way than to love your enemies.  Jesus taught it, and then lived it out by dying at the hands of those who hated him most.  Imagine what would happen if we chose to love those who we disagreed with first.

After the Wonder Years

When I was in middle school, I could not go anywhere without someone telling me I looked like “that kid on the Wonder Years”.  Ya know, the show in the late 80’s and early 90’s about the family in the turbulent 1960’s and 70’s and specifically through the eyes of young Kevin Arnold (Played by  It’s a coming of age series that shows Kevin go through his first love, become increasingly less innocent, and always has his best friend Paul at his side.

I liked the show, but the constant connection between him and I got old quick.  Especially since it was so spot on.  Unfortunately as time has gone on, the resemblance is much more difficult to see since his genes included hair, and mine did not.

Danica McKellar, who played Winnie, Kevin’s first love, has acted over the years in various roles, but nothing quite as high profile as her role as Kevin’s middle school crush.  She did however, graduate summa cum laude from UCLA in 1998 with a BS in Mathematics, followed by writing two bestselling books on the same topic called “Kiss my Math” (2007) and “Math doesn’t Suck” (2008).  In recent years, she has starred in several Hallmark Christmas Movies.

Recently, Mrs. McKellar posted on Instagram a video and statement about some other recent activity in her life.

McKellar said:

”Hey everyone!  I went live today to share the journey I’ve recently embarked on…. I’m not here to preach, but I have so much love in my heart I just had to share what I’m experiencing, and to share a little why its taken me up to this point to begin this journey.

In my life, starting in childhood, I had been made aware of all the hypocrisy in the various religions of Christianity, it being used for evil, power & control throughout history, and that had definitely biased me.  But that’s just people, that doesn’t represent God’s actual love for us.  And I can tell you I’m experiencing a relationship with God and Jesus that I’ve never had before, and it feel miraculous.  And it all started one evening when I was struggling with the idea of forgiveness and DM’d my good friend @Candacecbure about a passage from the Bible she had read on her instastories, and then she sent me a Bible and invited me to church…. I am wishing all of you the love and freedom I feel in my heart on this journey and a beautiful Sunday!!”

I felt like sharing this story on the Holman Report in the midst of my series on Deconstruction because in the midst of all the conversation we as Christians have, there is good happening in the world.  I believe God changes hearts and lives, and is making all things new.

What do you think about Mrs McKellar’s testimony?

What is Spiritual Deconstruction? Part 3

Here’s Part 1 and Part 2 of this series about Spiritual Deconstruction.  I suggest you read those before you read this, should you have the time.

In part 2 of this series, I wrote about “spiritual minimalism” or the idea of getting rid of unnecessary dogma associated with what a Christian must do in order to be a Christian.  Today, I’ll write about deconstruction, or the act of wholly deconstructing one’s faith, including the gospel and other forms of modern and ancient belief systems one has inherited in their previous Christian faith.  I must warn you, however, I am not this person nor do I ever want to be this person.  I say that because, having known several of these people, and unlike what most people think about them, it is not a desirable process.  I’m going to write this post with humility and grace, so much so that you might think I condone such an activity as to deconstruct one’s faith.

But honestly, I don’t even look at this as something which I condone or not.  It is simply something that is, and so I describe the challenges of deconstruction as best as I can without judgment or condoning, because my goal in this series is not to do either of those things.  My goal is to simply let you know what Spiritual Deconstruction is, and what it is not, and then to see if we can agree to disagree at times and build unity where we can.  I also want to build a strong case for the gospel, as we have defined it thus far, being the central and ultimate focus of our walk with and in Christ.

I remember the first time I found out that a close friend of mine was deconstructing his faith.  We were close.  Very close.  He moved with his family away from New England to the underbelly of the Bible Belt – the South.  He, like me, had befriended Rob Bell literature in all of its glory, and as time went on, he began to really hold on to some of the main tenets of Rob Bell’s theology, which as his books rolled on and he left his church, became more and more loosely affiliated with Christ.

Another friend told me about it, and so I quickly reached out and began to pray for my friend.  I did not judge him, and I did not scold him.  It’s interesting that was the first time I had ever prayed for my friend.

Fast forward years later and I have numerous friends and family all around me who have deconstructed in such ways, and in different ways.  In fact, one of the mistakes many make as they look at those who have deconstructed is that they believe they are all in the same club, laughing and partying and smoking weed together.  This could not be farther from the truth.  Deconstruction of one’s faith is hard and deep and makes those who do it sad for a variety of reasons.  Sometimes they completely go away from faith, and sometimes they end up with faith,but admittedly it looks very different from the faith they had before and certainly different from the one you might have if you remain in evangelicalism or mainline Christianity.

There are, however, some similarities between  those who let go of everything they have known faith wise and start from scratch.

First of all, they tend to start asking a lot of questions to people who are in the know.  They don’t do it out of pride and arrogance, but out of a genuine desire to know God more. (Obviously this is not true 100% of the time, but generally this is spot on). They might have read a book by Rob Bell or Brian McLaren or Richard Dawkins or Richard Rohr or Francis Collins and they had questions.  So they took those questions to those they trusted most.

Now here’s where there might be some disagreement.  I don’t think reading those people, both the ones who claim Christ and the ones who do not, is wrong.  This is the world that we live in.  A robust, universal, educational fiesta of ideas, philosophies, traditions, and opinions.  We all have access to such ideas and should have access to such ideas.  If Christianity only holds up in the island abyss of its own fenced-in worldview, then it doesn’t hold up at all.

So let’s say this person goes to someone they trust, a pastor or a staff member, and asks questions they have based on some of their studies and reading.  Two things then generally happen:  Either the pastor/mentor doesn’t answer the question to the satisfaction of the mentee or  the pastor/mentor flat out shuts down the questions and tells the mentee, sometimes gracefully and sometimes emphatically to stop reading the “trash”.  So the question asker has no choice but to take the discussion outside of the church realm, which is really ironic because that person will begin gravitating to other free thinkers.  Once again, I’m not providing a value for this happening, whether right or wrong, but I’m simply sharing that it happens.  Now more than ever.

After the initial questions, the asker begins to dissociate themselves from their in-church relationships.  This is not an easy thing, nor does it make them happy to do so. But they have simply not found the place and the people in their church to be a safe place (I know this is a buzz term) for them to walk on this journey any longer.  Remember, at this point they typically have made no decisions and don’t have a desire to lose their community.  Another important point here is that the people who we know and talk about that are deconstructing are typically people that have given immense amounts of time and money and their whole being to the church.  Nobody cares or is shocked when someone who attends church once every few months deconstructs.  People are shocked when friends of theirs do the unthinkable and begin to think differently.

I have friends who are gay. (I know immediately I’m stepping on a landmine here, so if I’ve written something wrong in that sentence, my apologies.)  Without debating the rightness or wrongness of that, I have to confess that it is easier for me to make friends with people who I meet as gay or lesbian than it is for me to not judge someone who I know as straight and then changes during the time I know them.

The same is true as we talk about those who deconstruct while we fellowship with them.  It can be difficult not to cast judgment and look down on them as they go through that process.  They might even know that and maybe even have judged others themselves in the past, and so more times than not, they willingly and sadly walk away from the community of faith they’ve poured into for years.

One of the main reasons this occurs, I believe, is the time they spent, “behind the curtain”.  With all of the talk of spirituality and Jesus rising and praying for miracles, there is infinitely more resources (time, money, etc…) poured into things that the leadership controls.  Once again, I’m not casting judgment but speaking one of the more obvious facts about the Western Church over the last several centuries.  Then when it comes to politics, it becomes ‘incomprehensible’ that we would “allow man control of what God should have in his charge.”  Along with seeing behind the curtain, and the questions that begin at a quick pace, the amount of leadership failures that have arisen in the last 30 years in church – including cover ups – force the deconstructionist to question not just his faith, but even the church.  Pastors cover up for other pastors, and make hero worship amongst themselves a group sport.  And the amount of overspending, sexual and power abuse, and financial mismanagement is unthinkable.

From here, the direction of the deconstructed one goes one of two ways:  Either they have a loose affiliation with Christianity, but it looks more like universalism, or they walk away from the Christian faith all together.  Many times they look fondly upon their time as a Christian, and many times they do not.  More times than not, however, they are conflicted somewhere in the middle of a lot of different feelings and thoughts.  They begin to feel more comfortable at a bar talking with friends about their jobs than at church talking about the next “great event” that’s about to happen.  They begin to take control over what they can in their own lives, because they feel others have taken control over their lives through their manipulative leadership.  My friend who I spoke about opening this post began to think of churches as being successful or not, only because the leadership was good or not, and having nothing to do with God’s providential hand guiding it.

Please note, once again, I’m not saying any of this is true or false, but I’m trying to give an accurate and fair analysis of what those who deconstruct their faith go through, based on friends and family I have, experiences I’ve gone through, and my own years of being “behind the curtain”.

Finally the person has undergone the change they’ve been seeking.  Many times their change looks more human than divine, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing.  Spiritual Minimalism looks similar at times.  The humanist part is what scares me.  Many times the deconstructor decides to drop the Christian worldview all together, and looks at themselves as a humanist.  One might say, “If it’s good for humanity, than it works for me.”  It is a stereotypical, yet almost unavoidable ending point to a search that started with a few questions.  I don’t mean to reduce the experiences of those walking this journey, but alas, it is the finish line.  Oddly, if Christians would look at what Jesus was actually doing, and would cease from transforming Paul into the “New 10 Commandments” of their faith, they would see that their walk, too, is amazing for humanity, and not just their four walls.  But more on that in the next post.

I return to the words of one of my friends after they read Part 1 of this series:  So where is the line?

I’m not sure if that’s the right question anymore. Another way of asking that question is “Is that person saved anymore or not?”  Also, I think it misses the greater point.  Perhaps the better question is, “Why would a person find themselves in a place like that in the first place?”  “What went wrong in that person’s life/heart/brain/eyes where they no longer saw Christianity, at least the way it is being practiced in their particular context, as a viable option for their worldview?”

But what if we stepped back for a bit, and instead of trying to control everything as we like to do, what if we prayed for those who  are dealing with such questions?  What if you took the time every day to pray for the countless numbers of people in your life who struggle with their faith, and you asked the Spirit of God to reach out to them and to lead them?  What if you prayed instead of guilted?

Does it scare you to give up that kind of control?  It does me.  I want to talk people into believing the way I want them to believe.  But if I may be so bold, if apologetics were going to work in people’s hearts, it would have done so in the 80’s 90’s and 2010’s, when more people were practicing this art form.

The other thing you can do is pray for those in your church and teach them to obey the commandments of Jesus not only in classroom form, but also by example.  Don’t wait until they start to slip away, and certainly don’t wait till they’re gone.  Pray for them now.  Talk to them now.  Deal with some of their issues now in a loving way.  Ask them to follow your example as Paul told his followers.  I don’t mean to say that every time someone deconstructs, it’s the pastor’s fault because of how he or she dealt with the situation, but when a pastor or a church member doesn’t look honestly at things brought up to them because they’re busy planning a service and because “that’s ridiculous”, they resemble the priest or the Levite more than they do the Samaritan (Luke 10:25-37).

Obviously the layout I’ve shared here is not everyone’s story, because a story is not a formula or a layout.  A real story is very fluid in its path.  So seek to “pray and empathize before you call out the lies” of those who are on that path.  Unless they are a total tool, they are not seeking to destroy Christianity.  You don’t have to get defensive.  Unfortunately those who are total tools tend to be the Christ followers, who have forgotten that this is a Spirit Led gig and not something you can control. So please pray and empathize.

And if you are reading this and are on the path of deconstruction, know that you are loved.  You are God’s child.  You are struggling, yes, but you have not been abandoned.  There is freedom when God leads, and slavery where man controls.  So if nothing else, please stick to praying and empathizing with and for those around you as well.

And one more thing, no matter who you are:

I love you.

What is Spiritual Deconstruction? Part 2

In part 1 of “What is Spiritual Deconstruction”? I focused on how Jesus “spiritually deconstructed” in a way like you and I  might minimalize our houses after we have accrued too much junk.  Today I will be sharing a few personal experiences of my own “spiritual minimalism” in an effort to show a healthy way of “deconstructing”.

Like any good fundamentalist teenager, I read the Bible a lot – King James Version of course.  When I was in 3rd and 4th grades, I read the Picture Bible, and by the time I was in middle school and high school, I became very learned regarding the Holy Writ.  I would read for hours, along with Christian biologies and in between my life on the basketball court.  I loved reading the Bible and was challenged often by my youth pastors and teachers (I attended a Christian school too).

Oddly I remember one of the first times I ever read Romans 14 and understood it and applied it to what I was going through.  I was reading a black leather bound Scofield Study Bible on a ride from my house to the Great Scot Grocery Store with my dad.  The drive wasn’t very far, but I didn’t want to go into the store, and so I continued to read while my dad shopped.  As I turned from Romans 13 to the ensuing chapter, I was stunned to read Romans 14:1.

“Him that is weak in the faith receive ye, but not to doubtful disputations.”

I had to read it again.

I’ll share the same verse with you now via the New Living Translation:  “Accept other believers who are weak in faith, and don’t argue with them about what they think is right or wrong.”

Then Paul goes on to examine why that sentence was true.  He uses eating habits and festival celebrations  examples to his larger point.  He says that some people eat only vegetarian food like plants and vegetables. And some people don’t just eat those things.  Then he talks about celebrating certain days as special or holy, and others not celebrating those days at all, but view every day as special.  He finishes by warning the believer to not condemn other believers who think differently about some of these topics that are apparently not central to the Kingdom or the Work of God.

“For the Kingdom of God is not a matter of what we eat or drink, but of living a life of goodness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit. If you serve Christ with this attitude, you will please God, and others will approve of you, too. So then, let us aim for harmony in the church and try to build each other up.”
‭‭Romans‬ ‭14:17-19‬ ‭NLT‬‬

My dad came out of the store and I couldn’t wait to show him what I found, and ask him several questions, in particular about Christian music with drums.

But as time went on, I realized that in todays society, Paul could have used several examples of ‘doubtful disputations’.

The question is, (and the question that I was asked by someone after the part 1) “Where is the line?”  Where is the line between spiritual minimalism and giving away the house?

Romans 14:17-19 does a fairly good job of answering the question, but the gospel might also be an answer.  However, and this is a hard one for a lot of people to digest, we must remember that it is a heart thing.  In other words, you can know the gospel and see a definition of the gospel, and maybe even believe that the events actually occurred, but if it does not sink into your inner being, and if you do not surrender to its call, It is no different than reading any piece of literature.

I’ll return to the NT Wright Definition of gospel here:

The gospel is the royal announcement that the crucified and risen Jesus, who died for our sins and rose again according to the scriptures has been enthroned as the true Lord of the world.  So as a result of this, we are called to salvation, out of sheer grace, leading them to repentance and faith in Jesus Christ as the risen Lord.

As I left a fundamentalist college (25 years ago this week) and moved on to the church world in Massachusetts, several things happened.  First off, I ran into my bout with church politics after my pastor had an affair.  It was a difficult and tumultuous part of my life in some sense, but a beautiful and interesting time in another.  I decided over time after reading the books “Blue Like Jazz” by Donald Miller and Velvet Elvis by Rob Bell that I was going to start practicing some “spiritual minimalism”.  I didn’t call it that, but that’s essentially what it was. (In fact, my friend George first called I that after reading part 1 of this series)

Over time, however, I felt very uncomfortable as I read some of the other books of Bells and others like Brian McLaren.  I didn’t feel uncomfortable like I hated them and thought they should be banned from bookstores everywhere.  I felt like I didn’t believe many of the things they were teaching, but appreciated some of the things they were trying to say.  One day while studying Rob bell’s church website, I came upon this article linked there about the authority of the Bible.  It was by a guy named NT Wright, and honestly, I was hooked.  I was hooked mainly because much of his writings were based on history and the cultural context of the New Testament.  Many of the questions I had about how we interpret Scripture, and specifically the New Testament, came because I love history and saw some inconsistencies between how we interpret scripture and what the gospels or Paul were actually saying when they wrote their letters or stories.

For instance, (for a glaringly obvious example) taking the phrase “do not love the world” and saying “you should not listen to rock music of any kind” or wear makeup or go see a movie.”

I began to read more Wright and Alan Hirsch and other theologians with a more missional vent, which I felt had been missing from churches in the American evangelical world.

But through all of that reading and searching, as I still do, and as I still attempt to spiritually minimalize, I was always anchored to the gospel, not only by definition, but by every lifestyle choice I wanted to make.  yes.  I believe with everything I have that the crucified and risen Jesus, died for my sins and has been enthroned as the true Lord of the world.  So I’ve been called to salvation, not because of anything I’ve done, but because of the sheer grace of God, I’ve been lead to repentance and faith in Jesus Christ as the risen Lord.  And I can and should now share that good news with others who I spend time with.

So I read Scripture and ask the Holy Spirit to lead me and guide me as I read and live my life, but over time, because I am human, I form habits, and in forming habits, sometimes I add things to my own faith.  Like church attendance or doing good works or a specific amount of time I spend in prayer each day or any number of things that join me on the journey, that if I am not careful, will commandeer my relationship with God like a leech to my ankle after I’ve walked in some mud.  That leech doesn’t belong there, but over time it will feel more comfortable or I will have the ability to ignore it.

May I suggest you consider how you might engage in some “spiritual minimalism” in your own life?  First, please be anchored to the gospel, the good news of Jesus.  You are not trying to empty you mind of everything, but if you have been called, out of sheer grace to salvation, do not forsake it for the world.  The good news is for you and it is about God.  Keep following.

But there are a lot of things in the church world that attempt to hijack the gospel and make it anything but good.

I’ll give you an example of this, and depending on who you are, you might actually hate this example and ignore anything else I write.  I get it.  Believe me, I was there.

Years ago, in the early early 2000’s, I sat at a table at the 99 Restaurant with a friend of mine who attended a college called WPI (Worcester Polytechnic Institute).  It’s one fo the foremost engineering schools in the country.  My friend, like most of my friends from there, was very smart.  As we talked about God and theology, I heard him insinuate that he believed God used evolution to bring about the creation of the world.  God was the creator, but he used evolution as the process.  And the first part of Genesis was man’s way of expressing how that all worked together.

The more he spoke, the more my head dizzied with judgments about his life and his need for Christ.  Now remember, my friend was a fervent Christian who continues to love Jesus to this day.  But I could not wrap my head around how he could believe in the the good news of Jesus while holding a belief in evolution, we in if God used was the one who started the process.

I was taught that the Genesis story was a literal story and there was no room to believe otherwise for a Christian.  And that was that.

I ignored the fact that there are plenty of allegory’s in the Bible, I just wasn’t ready to hear that the creation story might be one of them.  I didn’t know the fact that plenty of Christians from around the world, including the longtime director of the National Institute of Health and the creator of the Genome Project, Francis Collins believed the gospel and believed that God used the process of evolution to create the world.  Connecting a literal interpretation of the Creation story to my belief in the gospel was a must…until it wasn’t.

All that to say, “Spiritual Minimalism” can be a beautiful thing when it is anchored to the gospel as your call to salvation. I encourage you to engage in it.  To get into scripture, not for the purpose of destruction, but for the purpose of knowing and maintaining “why” you are involved and have given your life to something.

But of course there are times when things get deconstructed and destructed.  More on that later.

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What is Spiritual Deconstruction? Part 1

Recently I posted on Facebook (or Meta or whatever it is) an article written by Carey Nieuwhof, an evangelical pastor called “Five real reasons young people are deconstructing their faith.”  I thought the article was well thought out and talked intensely about how the church should deal with such things when it occurs in our midst.

Shortly after I posted it, several people from both sides of the conversation (People who have deconstructed their faith in some ways and people who dont believe one should do such things) posted in various tones their opinions on the topic.  Of course, some posted Bible verses with the understanding that they would not be criminal enough to use their feelings and emotions to make such important decisions in their life.  During some of the conversation, things got a bit heated, but calmed down as time marched on.

One of the big problems we have with this conversation in general is our differing thoughts as to what “deconstruction” actually is, so I thought I’d attempt to answer that question based on Scripture, my own personal experiences, and the experiences of the countless numbers of friends I have who have or are going through what most of us would consider “deconstruction”.

So let’s start with Scripture, as I have no desire to be thwacked by those zealots who might attack me for doing something so vile as starting with my own experiences.

There is a passage in the gospels towards the end of Jesus’ ministry where those who disliked him went after him, trying to trick him with head games and questions of the intellect.  (Matthew 12:30,31)  Their hope rested in that he would answer wrongly, and those answered would make him less popular with the general Jewish population.  Sort of like when Jerry Falwell Jr or Rob Bell answers a question on todays general Christian population – A third of the people of the people hate them, a third of the people love them, and a third don’t really care what they say.

One of the teachers of religious law had been watching Jesus answer the questions, and decided to throw his hat in the ring.

“Of all the commandments, which is the most important?”

In reality, it was a very good question to attempt to hoodwink Jesus and make him less popular.  You see, Judaism and its followers too, had their favorite passages based on how they interpreted the Law.  The Pharisees, the Sadducee’s, Zealots, Essenes, and the like all had their focuses and views of the way Scripture should be read, and then practiced.  If Jesus were to answer the question wrongly, they would preach to their followers how wrong he was, and Jesus’ influence would theoretically wane.

Jesus replied, “The most important commandment is this: ‘Listen, O Israel! The Lord our God is the one and only Lord. And you must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength.’ The second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ No other commandment is greater than these.”

So Jesus goes after what many today believe is the heart of the Law and the Prophets.  Love God.  Love people.

Simple right?

Wrong.

Most people don’t do both of these things, including Christians and including what we might consider “Good Christians.”  We get angry.  We get mad when someone disagrees with us on social media.  We cruelly judge.  We foolishly believe we are the author of our success, and neglect or forget God and the love and worship we are called to have for Him. Then Jesus comes along, becomes the King of the world when He defeats death, and then as followers, we are called to, through His Spirit, produce what he wants us to produce for his Kingdom.

Love, Joy, peace, patience, goodness, gentleness, faith, and self control.

I’m sorry, but I don’t know that many Christians are actively producing this kind of fruit today.

The teacher of religious law replied, “Well said, Teacher. You have spoken the truth by saying that there is only one God and no other. And I know it is important to love him with all my heart and all my understanding and all my strength, and to love my neighbor as myself. This is more important than to offer all of the burnt offerings and sacrifices required in the law.””

‭‭The teacher of religious law has an incredible aha moment here as he responds to Jesus’ epic answer.  He realizes that there is a difference – and this is important – between the commandment, and practices we put in place to express that commandment.

Like the difference between loving God and going to church.

Or loving God and serving in a food drive.

Or loving God and reading the Bible.

Or loving our neighbor and working in a church.

Or loving our neighbor and being nice to people on Sunday morning.

Or loving our neighbor and going to a small group.

The man realized the difference between the commandment and expression of that commandment.  In a sense, he was deconstructing and perhaps he didn’t realize it.

Which brings us to the heart of the issue.  Literally.

The thing about deconstruction is that it’s a heart thing. And so is Christianity.  Following Jesus for the disciples and for anyone who joined them was a huge lesson in deconstruction. They were taught one thing about God and sacrifices and ritual and observances, etc…, then Jesus comes along, and claims to be the fulfillment of that story.  In other words, all of the stories, traditions, and sacrifices which occurred in the Old Testament came to fruition in and through the person of Jesus.  And that’s the gospel.

Or:

The gospel is the royal announcement that the crucified and risen Jesus, who died for our sins and rose again according to the scriptures has been enthroned as the true Lord of the world.  So as a result of this, we are called to salvation, out of sheer grace, leading them to repentance and faith in Jesus Christ as the risen Lord. (NT Wright)

In another passage early in the gospel of Mark, (Mark 3:1-6)  Jesus heals a man with a deformed hand on the Sabbath day.  Let me make this perfectly clear – this was against the literal law of Moses and the following additions priests made over time.  It was “unlawful” not just for Jesus to heal, but for Jesus and the Jews to do much of anything during that day of the week.  Jews were commanded to rest on the Sabbath, and this was part of God’s law from the very beginning.  It was a part of the creation story and it was a part of the 10 commandments.  It wasn’t like Jesus just forgot about this.  He knew perfectly well what he was doing.  He was “deconstructing.”

Now before you burn me at the stake of self righteousness, I want to step back.  Obviously Jesus wasn’t deconstructing in a way that we can deconstruct.  But he was deconstructing in a way like you and I might minimalize our houses after we have accrued too much junk.  He didn’t get rid of the house.   He got rid of all the stuff in the house that made it look like an episode of “Hoarders”.  He was anchored in his love for God and his love for his fellow man.  That anchor separates the two expressions of deconstruction, one of which is important and one of which is, not dangerous, but hard to take for believers.

I’ll talk more about those two in my next few posts.

But I’ll end this post with this.

How have you and/or your church added to the gospel in a heavy handed and burdensome way?

What rules have you laid down, not for your own life, but for the life of others, that do not produce freedom, but bondage?

How is your heart heavy with bitterness because someone you have seen on Facebook or at church has (metaphorically speaking) healed someone during Sabbath?

You see, Christianity, like deconstruction, is a heart thing.  If reading the gospels hasn’t taught you that, you have not read the gospels.  So as we peek into this idea of deconstruction over my next few blog posts, ask yourself, “How is my heart?”  Is it devoted to God?  Is it committed to genuinely loving my neighbor (even if my neighbor isn’t following my own laws)?  And what judgment have I laid out towards someone else that is reserved for God?

By the way, deconstructers can judge others in their heart as much as anyone who feels strongly about their place in the Faith-time continuum.  But that’s for another post.

Depp Vs. Heard

This is where we are at in our culture.  We want to soak in all of the details between two famous actors – one seasoned, A-lister who’s been around a while & one young, vibrant blonde who’s younger and in 2022, much easier on the eyes.  And they’re defamation law suits about the way each of them have treated one another are now online, on YouTube, or just about anywhere else you can find them.  Our culture is absorbing every bit of the detailed fallout in their relationship.  And truthfully, I’ve found myself watching a few clips of Johnny’s testimony or Amber’s tearful reaction.

But as Christians, should we participate in any of this drama infused ‘entertainment’?

Without judgment in any way if you too have been wooed into clicking play on that click baited fluorescent flag, the answer is probably a resounding “no!”  But why are we fixated on this most monstrous of gossip machines, and why do we participate in them as Christians?

First off, Paul says in Philippians that we should “fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.”  It’s clear that the civil trial between Mr. Depp and Ms. Heard do not neatly fit into any of those categories.  There is nothing right or pure or good about two people hashing out their grievances in public by revealing a ton of grueling, intimate moments they’ve had together.

And this is my real problem with Christians taking all of this in:  We are not called to inhale gossip, or to consume intense amounts of of popular culture, but to create, cultivate, and advance the Kingdom of God.  We could sit and listen to hours and hours of trial recordings between Depp and Heard or Supreme Court Justice nominations or even OJ Simpson, and it could be oddly entertaining and produce certain hormones in us that cause enjoyment, but consuming all of that, what amount to gossip, does nothing for what God calls the believer to do.

The trial does, however, give us a conversation piece, for which to start helping someone understand why the Kingdom of God is so important in the first place.  Consider this:  (and this is the only reason why viewing a trial like this might be ok) What if you are talking to someone about the trial and you help someone better understand how the two could have resolved their differences in different ways.  For instance, what if Depp didn’t file a suit against Heard for her op-ed piece in the New York Times?  How could he have handled it differently? Or what would have happened if Heard would have written in that oped that she forgives Depp, and anything he might have done to her.  Forgiveness is a powerful thing, and can change people in powerful ways.

In the Kingdom of God, there is a distinct vision that God has for the future heaven and the future earth, pointing people to what we know about that heaven and that earth based on what we know about God through Scripture can be a powerful tool.  AS followers of Jesus, it is in our best interest and the best interest of the world to help expand that vision as opposed to soaking in what this present world has made of itself.

So make that a goal of yours, Christ follower.  Take God’s vision for the world and spread that good news around.  Otherwise, you’ll be enslaved by someone else vision, and that just might be two actors going toe to toe with one another, trying to convince you that they and the  millions of dollars they make every year, are victims.

 

 

Should Christians have Unbelieving Heroes?

What do you think about the Christian and the hero.  Should Christians have non Christian heroes? As a young teenager, I had a ton of posters and magazines photos on my bedroom wall, ranging anywhere from Michael W Smith to Larry Bird to Mariah Carey, the latter of which frustrated my mother quite a bit.  But what can I say?  I had a vision of love.

Recently I’ve noticed a disturbing trend on our more visual, open bedroom walls, otherwise known as our social media pages:  It would seem we have developed a taste for ‘heroes’ who divide us as Christians.  I certainly have.  I tend to enjoy the likes of Elon Musk and Joe Rogan, so I share their tweets and youtube videos.  I do this because I’m somewhat of an independent thinker and voter.

Others with a more progressive bent might share the posts /tweets of  AOC or Alyssa Milano or Bernie Sanders.  Still others who have sworn allegiance to the gods of conservatism tend to have Ben Shapiro, Jordan Peterson, or Dan Crenshaw on their pages.

As time has gone on in this post Trump/post pandemic world we now live in, people have obviously strayed away from those who’s bedroom walls they’ve disagreed with, causing a division amongst the Christian ranks, even casting judgment towards the other parties as to whether they are “really Christians or not”.

All of this begs the question as to whether or not Christians should even be looking up to those who do not profess Christ in their everyday life, especially when those ‘heroes’ are so polarizing to other Christians.

Of course I am not asking whether or not we should be educating ourselves and growing in the area of general areas of world knowledge, but should we then look only to those examples and post only those particular world views?

After considering this question, I have a few thoughts about how Christianity connects with heroism:

 Our ultimate hero is Jesus.

This kind of feels like a Jesus juke, but it is vitally important that we remember this.  Jesus is now the King of the world, as opposed to Satan or governments or even great people.  It is in our best interests AND the best interest of others to remember this and act like it.  Paul says to Timothy in 1 Timothy 6, “I charge you in the presence of God, who gives life to all things, and of Christ Jesus…, to keep the commandment in stained and free from approach until the appearing of our Lord Jesus Christ, which he will display at the proper time-He who is blessed and only sovereign, the King of Kings and Lord of Lords.”

One huge problem I see in the Christian world is the way that rock star pastors present themselves as heroes.  They make themselves model human beings instead of models of love as described in Phil. 2.   As a Christian, it is vital you remember that you do not follow a republican, independent or moderate or a sports team or pop star, but you follow the ultimate King.

2.  Our ultimate responsibility is love
Writing to the church in Colossians, Paul says, “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy  and dearly loved, clothe yourself with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.  bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance with someone.  Forgive as the Lord forgave you.  And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.”  To have heroes is to love something dearly, and then to love what that hero does with that thing that you love.  We must be careful with the things we claim to love.  If we love ice cream but hate our fellow church member, we have a bigger issue.  We are called to love, and to do it well.  If we love something so much and don’t love others who don’t love that thing, we have an even bigger issue.

3.  Our ultimate prize when we love right is heroism.
You can be a hero too.  You can.  This is how Martin Luther King Jr. did it or Mother Theresa or Billy Graham.  They gave their lives so intensely to Jesus and to love, that they became heroes to others.  Instead of looking up to others all of the time, wouldn’t it be better to be the hero.  All you have to do is give yourself to love and to the love of the King more specifically.  This is not easy, because typically we gravitate to making things about us and the things we like.  Christ calls us to love outwardly and to serve others.  Paul, while he was in prison, said this: “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.”
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Obviously I said nothing in this post about whether or not you should have heroes, but I pray that this will help you to consider which heroes you have and which you post.  Divisive heroes can be good for your ego, but they can also be hurtful to others should you rub a divisive person’s posts or videos down others throats.  This of course is not the way of love.

But finally, make it your business to give love away and to eventually be someone else’s hero!  Point people to Christ.  And enjoy the journey as you do it.

Peter and the Act of Denial

It is not unlike us to stand or sit around a crackling fire with a group of friends, smoke wafting up and down and through the nostrils of each individual, sometimes one or two people at a time.  And many times we are spending recreational currency with a group of people who may or may not care about Jesus or his death.  There are people who stand at our side, or sit next to us drinking a beer or cooking a s’more, who care little for the things of God.  In fact, it could and should be argued that as the church, our calling is not to sequester ourselves for the whole of our lives, inside of a group of people who all think and act the same – at least in public.

It is no problem to step outside of those guardrails and talk and be with the world.  THe Atheist, the critic, and the skeptic all have something in common with us – we are all made in God’s image and we all are loved by the same God who gave his life for us.

But standing there at the fire, at the intersection of talking about weather and sports and fashion trends and Netflix, occasionally the conversation between the devout and the uninterested might delve into something real and authentic.  

And we may be assaulted by the inconvenient accusation that we too, follow Jesus.  But 2000 years later, we have an even more difficult question to answer than “Hey, you’re one of those followers, aren’t you?”  We now must look at our family, friends, or co workers, and answer the question, “Why?”

Why do we read a collection of stories about a guy who was killed by Romans Millenia ago?  And why do we bathe in that death as something as special as bubbles in a a child’s bathtub?  Why do we sit in silence processing his horrific punishment and what it means to us, personally and as a “single body”?

It is in those most precarious moments of reckoning that we also have an advantage over the most talkative of Christ’s original 12:  We have been given ‘parakletos’ by God himself – to advocate, and help, and guide, and to walk alongside us as we sit around a fire, or in our home, or in our schools or in our workplaces.  When we are encountered with the question of who we follow, the Holy Spirit intercedes for us, or can intercede for us, if we are open to such advocating.

Too often we are afraid of the consequences of saying “yes, I absolutely follow Jesus.”  WE are afraid of answering the question why.  We are afraid of dying to ourself or even dying at all, and so in our pitiful fear of what others will think about us and the direction we have chosen, we stubbornly look at those who dare to inquire about our allegiance, and we, not quite so boldly as Peter, push off the interrogation.  Oh we don’t say things like, “Woman, I don’t know him!” Or “Man, I am not!”  We’re much too Christianese and proper for all of that kind of denial.  Our answers to such intense inquiries are somewhere in the neighborhood of feigning ignorance, redirecting the conversation back to surface level topics like how far that home run ball was hit, or worse yet, sharing the dates and times that our organizational church service meets each week.  In short, we have developed amazing, incredible creative ways to deny who we follow and why we follow him.

Denial in the way we in the 21st century have shaped it is a much more palatable taste.  It goes down easy, and tames the harshest of realities.  Perhaps we are not really following the Rabbi as much as we think we are following him.  Sitting here today, processing what the death of Jesus means is always difficult.  I want it to mean something wonderful for me.  I want to mold it into a view of heaven that allows me to someday launch 3 pointers from golden rims and bay windowed backboards with the likes of Steph Curry and Larry Bird, leaving all this messy earth stuff behind.  But this type of “Send the earth to hell” philosophy denies what Yeshua stood for as he lived his actual life.  It ignores his teachings, and simply creates a little club where we never have to answer for real “why” we follow Him.

What’s worse is our reaction to our own compromising denials.  We continue on with our lives, hitting up church every Sunday and recreating the busyness of our schedules each week like we live in some sort of regurgitated Truman Show or Matrix cycle of life.  It all seems real, but we are called by parakletos to “take the red pill” or step into giving our lives to this new King of the World.

Peter eventually steps into this new world, starting with his breakfast date on the beach and then on Pentecost.  But in the darkness of the night of Jesus’ arrest, when it was all going down and stuff was beginning to get real, he lost it.   Not once, and not twice but three times.

You might ask yourself, “Self, how could a hero like Samson tell his secret to Delilah several times even after he knew she was in cahoots with his enemies? or how could the Father of great nations , Abraham, lie about his wife multiple times, despite his already cemented faith that God would guide him and take care of him? or how could Peter, not even a day after his Teacher told him he would deny him, turn around and deny him just as he said he would?

Because denial, like most sins, doesn’t come out of the blue.  It slowly mixes into our hearts  with small amounts of doubt and insolence and independence that we as the creation have and always will have.  It reminds us that pride will always attempt to break into our souls and replace the brittle trust we have in who we follow.

It reminds me of the time that as a 19 year old single boy, I drove a Grey hound bus from Tucson Arizona to Pensacola Florida.  Destination:  College.  I know I’m a pastor, but please allow me a moment of authenticity and self deprication in my past to get across a greater point.  The 52 hour bus drive felt like a forever journey in the heat of the summer, but I was prepared to make the trip as comfortable as possible.  So I put on my most flexible pair of basketball shorts, white converse shoes, and a  brand new crisp and clean “Jesus is my boy” T shirt.  The bus was somewhat full except for a few seats, including the seat next to mine.  At the stop after I got on in El Paso Texas, a lovely girl walked in and I prayed to Jesus, “Please, please, please let her sit by me.”  It’s amazing the things we go to God about.

She sat next to me.  

IN case you didn’t know, Greyhound buses stop every 30 minutes, or at least it feels like it.  So at the next stop, I quickly went to the reroom and turned my t-shirt, yes the “Jesus is my boy” shirt, in side out.  I wanted to garner all her attention for myself.  I didn’t want “my boy” to get it.   I laugh about it now, but whether it be Samson or Abraham or Peter or myself or you, we all come to a place where we must fess up to our own inclination to ditch following Jesus for a hopeless alternative – following ourselves.

We know that following ourselves doesn’t work.  We’ve tried it a countless number of times, and yet, we will still try more, and no amount of trying and the miserable feeling that follows will stop us from trying again and again.

At least Peter understood the weight of his actions.  Luke says, “Peter remembered…and he went outside and wept miserably.”

thankfully we need not be anchored down with our own fears and our own pride, but we can bask in the freedom that comes with parakletos.  Oh we will be tempted to judge other Christians for the way they follow after our advocate.  But beware, for they are only a different part of the one body that Christ has.  One of the gravest sins a believer can make is believing that the Holy Spirit will move another believer the same way the Holy Spirit moved him or her.

But you decide today to walk in parakletos, and allow the Holy Spirit to walk with, to advocate for, to guide, and to lead you into all truth.  And then you will not need to fear in such a way that you make multiple unwise decisions like Samson, or you will not be hindered by the false tongue of Abraham, or you will not awkwardly go so far as to turn your t shirt inside out so some girl who you do not know will not know who you know or you will not end up having a miserable, weeping night like the future spokesperson for the Jerusalem church.

Walk with Parakletos in the thickness of Christ’s death, and you will be dead to sin, but alive to God in Christ Jesus.

Years ago I read a story from Professor NT Wright about following Jesus in times of difficulty.  he said:

“I was fortunate enough to be involved in a service commemorating the life and witness of Wang Zhiming. He was a Chinese pastor who, after maintaining a clear Christian witness in the days of Mao’s cultural revolution, was executed in front of a large crowd. He is one of hundreds of martyrs who, in recent memory, have given their life for the Christian faith.  Among the things people saw in him, the things that made the authorities angry, was that he went on telling the truth even when it became first costly, then dangerous, and finally almost suicidal, to do so. Faith and truth, expressed with grace and dignity, are unconquerable. That’s why Wang Zhiming is portrayed in a statue on the west front of Westminster Abbey, while nobody today remembers his accusers or executioners.”

Sure, Peter was weak, and so are we.  And it is just that sort of weakness that was the reason why we have been sent  the Holy Spirit.  “Faith and truth, expressed with grace and dignity, in the midst of your school, workplace, home or your backyard fire pit, are indeed unconquerable. 

How can I have more joy, February 3

How can I have more joy? Want more joy in your life?  Each day of this year, we are offering you a quick action you can do to find joy in the reality that is your existence.  You, my friend, are not alone!

 Write down two things that made you really happy this weekend that were out of the ordinary.