David Schwinghammer's Blog - Posts Tagged "allen-eskens"
The Life We Bury
Joe Talbert escapes his soul-sucking family situation in Austin, Minnesota, to enroll at the University of Minnesota where he is assigned to write a biography for an English class.
Taking the assignment seriously, Joe goes where he thinks he might find the best story, an area senior citizens' home, targeting a Vietnam veteran, but he may have bitten off more than he can chew. Not only did Carl Iverson win a Silver Star in Vietnam, but he's also been convicted of murdering a fourteen-year-old girl. He was released from prison because he's dying of cancer.
A subplot involves Joe's autistic brother, Jeremy; Joe feels guilty about leaving him with his alcoholic mother. Worse yet, she's got an abusive new boyfriend. Joe rescues him, temporarily, and takes him back to his apartment in the Twin Cities, where he returns from school one day to find Jeremy having a high old time with the girl next door, Lila, whom Jeremy has been trying to talk to since he moved in.
Author, Allen Eskens, is a 2015 Edgar Award finalist, but he's got that Jeffery Deaver habit of employing the unlikely twist. It doesn't take long for Joe to be convinced Carl is not guilty of the murder. He goes so far as to get the trial transcript and a box of evidence. This biography is turning into a book. Let me give you just one example of an unlikely twist. The murdered girl, Chrystal Hagen, kept a diary, but it's in code. Joe and Lila, with Jeremy's unintentional help, break it, and Joe goes to confront the suspect whose initials are mentioned in the code. Joe just happens to be a part-time bouncer; he can kick you in just the right spot and take out your kneecap, but when he's talking to the suspect, who's drinking, his knuckles are turning white as he grips the neck of the whiskey bottle, and Joe gets conked. Wouldn't you be expecting an assault while interviewing a potential murder suspect? Joe is pretty sure this is the guy, but Allen Eskens needs to move the story. That's called author intrusion, and it'll get you a failing grade in creative writing class.
We also get some back story on Lila. She's standoffish because of her promiscuous past. She doesn't want to be that kind of person. At one point in the story Joe almost freezes to death, gets hit with a whiskey bottle and is almost choked to death. Shortly thereafter, Lila has sex with Joe. Would she really do this? First off Joe is in no condition to make love, although he probably wants to; secondly, she initiates the sex. I don't think so, not yet anyway. We need the author to do a much better job overcoming her guilt. Maybe move it to the unrealistic ending where Santa Claus has come to town, too.
Taking the assignment seriously, Joe goes where he thinks he might find the best story, an area senior citizens' home, targeting a Vietnam veteran, but he may have bitten off more than he can chew. Not only did Carl Iverson win a Silver Star in Vietnam, but he's also been convicted of murdering a fourteen-year-old girl. He was released from prison because he's dying of cancer.
A subplot involves Joe's autistic brother, Jeremy; Joe feels guilty about leaving him with his alcoholic mother. Worse yet, she's got an abusive new boyfriend. Joe rescues him, temporarily, and takes him back to his apartment in the Twin Cities, where he returns from school one day to find Jeremy having a high old time with the girl next door, Lila, whom Jeremy has been trying to talk to since he moved in.
Author, Allen Eskens, is a 2015 Edgar Award finalist, but he's got that Jeffery Deaver habit of employing the unlikely twist. It doesn't take long for Joe to be convinced Carl is not guilty of the murder. He goes so far as to get the trial transcript and a box of evidence. This biography is turning into a book. Let me give you just one example of an unlikely twist. The murdered girl, Chrystal Hagen, kept a diary, but it's in code. Joe and Lila, with Jeremy's unintentional help, break it, and Joe goes to confront the suspect whose initials are mentioned in the code. Joe just happens to be a part-time bouncer; he can kick you in just the right spot and take out your kneecap, but when he's talking to the suspect, who's drinking, his knuckles are turning white as he grips the neck of the whiskey bottle, and Joe gets conked. Wouldn't you be expecting an assault while interviewing a potential murder suspect? Joe is pretty sure this is the guy, but Allen Eskens needs to move the story. That's called author intrusion, and it'll get you a failing grade in creative writing class.
We also get some back story on Lila. She's standoffish because of her promiscuous past. She doesn't want to be that kind of person. At one point in the story Joe almost freezes to death, gets hit with a whiskey bottle and is almost choked to death. Shortly thereafter, Lila has sex with Joe. Would she really do this? First off Joe is in no condition to make love, although he probably wants to; secondly, she initiates the sex. I don't think so, not yet anyway. We need the author to do a much better job overcoming her guilt. Maybe move it to the unrealistic ending where Santa Claus has come to town, too.
