Joy Neal Kidney's Blog

Surviving Sue–a resilient survival story

Surviving Sue by Dr. Vicki Atkinson

Book Blurb: “Surviving Sue” is a heart-wrenching story about the torment of keeping secrets, told from the daughter’s perspective. She navigates her mother’s mental health and addiction issues, while trying to shield and protect her disabled sister.

“Surviving Sue” is about the power of storytelling to build resiliency, and a guidebook for others who struggle with complex family issues including Alzheimer’s, depression, alcoholism, developmental and physical disabilities.

My Thoughts

The author survived 54 years of living with her mother Sue who, year by year, sank into madness–alcoholism, pills, controlling and secret behavior, tirades, webs of lies, casting blame, even tethering a disabled daughter into it all. Not only has the author, Vicki Atkinson, emerged a still-healing survivor, she advocated for her mother for years, when she could, and for her disabled sister.

Vicki continues to share her story at speaking engagements and through her inspiring blog, Victoria Ponders. Her resilience and winsome sense of humor are inspirations to her readers and followers. She brings joy and encouragement to everyone she comes in contact with.

Vicki has degrees in counseling and psychology as well as a doctorate in adult education. What she successfully survived has made her an effective licensed professional counselor, as well as a leadership and life coach.

Her own adult daughter observed the mayhem her grandmother Sue inflicted, so Surviving Sue is helping the next generation–and also her followers–with a legacy of coming to terms with a family member with severe mental illness.

The Author

Dr. Atkinson (Vicki) earned degrees in counseling and psychology and a doctorate in adult education. Vicki is a licensed professional counselor (LPC) and a leadership and life coach in private practice. Vicki lives near Chicago with her husband Paul and her daughter, Delaney, who continues to be the light of her life. Vicki’s beloved sister with disabilities, Lisa, continues to thrive, delighting friends and family with her big heart and sense of humor.

Recently Vicki was a guest of John Busbee on The Culture Buzz. I think you would enjoy listening to their 15 minute interview.

Dr. Vicki Atkinson has a professional website for her Atkinson Group personal and professional development.

This beautiful book, like a meadowlark’s song floating across the Iowa plains, lingers—melancholic, inspiring, and completely human

Author Patricia Furstenberg from South Africa recommended and rated Meadowlark Songs Five Stars on BookBub. She wrote such a winsome review as well:

In Meadowlark Songs: A Motherline Legacy, Joy Neal Kidney serves as both a historian and a bard for her own bloodline, following the sinewy thread of maternal inheritance through seven generations of Iowa women. With surprising tenderness and an eye for the softly important moments of everyday life, she curates a lyrical history that is part memoir, part elegy, and part love letter to those who came before.

This isn’t a book about major events or political movements. Rather, it is a deep, resonant dive into the personal geography of family—cooking fires and quilt stitches, Sunday feasts and funeral hymns, meadowlarks’ songs and the weight of antique dinnerware. via the lives of Jane, Lucy, Emilia, Laura, Leora, Doris, and finally Joy herself, we see how strength, faith, sadness, and perseverance are passed down not only via mitochondrial DNA but also through gesture, memory, and example.

The themes of faith, adversity, and female agency recur throughout the story. This is especially evident in the lives of women like Leora Goff Wilson, who kept her family afloat during two world wars and the Great Depression, and Doris Neal, a lady shaped by hard times, sorrow, and resilience. These tales show how character is formed in the crucible of history, how hope is nurtured during difficult times, and how women pulled families together through sheer willpower and practical magic.

The book’s resonance is heightened by its poetic cadence. Kidney’s style frequently evokes the tenderness of hymnals and the seriousness of scripture—appropriate for a lineage that combines pioneer grit and calm grace. Her chapter titles sound like folk songs—”Meadowlarks and Prairie Roses,” “Faith,” “Eggs and Dandelion Greens,” “That Awful Feeling of Grief”—and the entire work is filled with the music of recollection.

Though based on a single family’s tale, this book conveys a universal truth: we are all the product of those who came before us, formed by their choices, guided by their ideals, and frequently inspired by the quiet courage of their lives.

Readers of family memoirs, American history buffs with a concentration on pioneer and Depression-era living, genealogists, women’s history lovers, and anybody who has ever turned the yellowing pages of an old photo book and wondered what happened to the people in those sepia photographs.

This beautiful book, like a meadowlark’s song floating across the Iowa plains, lingers—melancholic, inspiring, and completely human.

Patricia Furstenberg is an internationally published author of 19 books, celebrated for her evocative blend of historical fiction, folklore, and poetic storytelling. She lives between worlds — Romania and South Africa, folklore and fact, medicine and literature — crafting stories that explore human tenacity, historical nuance, and the enduring power of compassion. Whether writing for adults or children, her books invite readers to pause, reflect, and rediscover the extraordinary within the ordinary.

Patricia’s Author Page on BookBub

Budding Star Quilt

This is a near-twin to the quilt the Great Iowa Quilt Factory made for the Living History Farms quilt raffle during the 1980s. Mom liked it so well and bought a lot of tickets, but she didn’t win it. I told her I’d choose anything she wanted when my turn came up in the GIQF rotation. She helped pick out the fabrics.

The GIQF began piecing this (by hand) in March of 1987 and I set the sections together late that year. I enjoyed hand quilting it over several months, finishing it in March of 1990.

Shows: 1990: Stuart Care Center Quilt Show, Stuart, Iowa; Iowa State Fair (2nd Place, group quilts)

1993: Quilt Extravaganza IV, Hoyt Sherman Place, Des Moines, Iowa

I was the unofficial GIQF label stitcher, each with a miniature quilt square, the name of the quilt, the year, the owner, and that it is indeed an official Great Iowa Quilt Factory quilt, hand-stitched by 6-8 quilting friends.

How are those infusions supposed to help?

Crohn’s disease is a chronic (lifelong) autoimmune condition that inflames and irritates your digestive tract. It can’t be cured so I’m thankful I didn’t come down with it until recently. After a difficult spring, I finally got a diagnosis mid-May, but that sure didn’t solve anything.

Treatments typically help manage symptoms. Steroids ease them for some sufferers. I tried three different ones, alone and in combination. Nothing. Prednisone made things worse, adding muscle weakness to the mix. Meanwhile, I was seen by a physician with more experience. I’m so thankful for the change. It was a miserable spring and summer, and led to trying an infusion next.

My first dose of Inflectra/Remicade was finally at the end of July.  It’s a biologic that blocks proteins that are the key drivers of the painful inflammation. It didn’t last the two weeks I had to wait for the next one, so I was skeptical. I just had the third one after another bumpy month (every couple of days, I needed to fall back to liquids and BRAT (banana-rice-applesauce-toast), and–if we needed to go somewhere–lots of Pepto Bismol tabs. But “episodes” aren’t as painful, so I’m starting to feel hopeful!

These biologics can also cause serious side effects. So does the pill I take to keep my body from rejecting the infusion. But I’m so thankful for this welcome relief.

I was feeling more hopeful than I look here. The machine at left takes blood pressure. The IV drip is in the upper right.

The first infusion took about four hours, probably harder on my Favorite Guy than me. The infusion itself drips for about two hours, but they need to weigh me each time because that determines how much I’ll be given. That’s sent to the pharmacy, which has my prescription. I’m set up in a comfy chair that heats, get fitted with an IV on top of my forearm, and take Benadryl and Tylenol by mouth. (The first time, the Benadryl was by IV and I was groggy for two days.)

Once the little bag arrives from the pharmacy and is hooked up to the IV, regular temp and blood pressure checks begin. Every 15 minutes, the unit beeps and the rate of drops increases, along with recording my temp and BP.

This shows the screen that the nurses consult and update every 15 minutes. My Favorite Guy’s chair isn’t quite as comfy as mine, so he often heads out for a walk.

We’re offered sack lunches, which helps Guy with the waiting. I can’t have gluten, so I get a bag of chips. I’m too groggy to read, but half a dozen friendly nurses rotate through the area as several units beep for attention. There were about ten patients undergoing the treatment.

Infusions are given for several ailments, including arthritis and MS. I don’t know anyone else personally with Crohn’s, but it seems like everyone knows someone dealing with it.

Thank God for modern medicine and nurses who know how to run these modern gadgets. And for a young MD whom I get to see again in about 10 days, for the first time since the infusions began. (She did call me after the first one.) She should have plenty of numbers from extra lab tests and the infusions to decide how my cells are handling it all, and how soon I’ll receive another one.

I’ve been able to eat eggs, roasted sweet potato, leftover pot roast (frozen from our last time at the Machine Shed Restaurant), and a little tuna salad three days in a row–for the first time in months. I’m exhausted so I can tell my body is under stress, but I praise God from whom all blessings flow!

Granddaughter Kate owns the twin to the little chipmunk. I offered her both, but she likes the idea of both of us having one.

I certainly appreciate your prayers, well wishes, and a sweet gift from a Leora fan from Guthrie County who is also a bee-keeper!

Update from this morning: Well, I’m back on liquids and BRAT today, but I’m still hopeful and grateful.

Dan Walsh’s Gilded Secrets Series

Gilded Secrets Series

If you enjoy historical novels that include compelling characters wrestling with complex issues, you’ll enjoy Dan Walsh’s two-book Gilded Secrets Series. Scandal at the Belmont was just published August 30. 

The Perfect Stranger

Book Blurb: It is the spring in New York City, 1912, and Lily Whitaker, a wealthy young socialite, is in love. While serving at a ministry to the poor in her church, she meets a handsome young businessman. Charles Bennington moved to New York from San Francisco 10 years ago with just the clothes on his back. But he’s worked hard, taken every advantage the good Lord’s provided and now owns a thriving business. He can hardly believe it when he caught Lily’s attention and, later, receives permission from her father to court her. Two months after that, he agrees to let Charles marry Lily, who’s overjoyed at the news. Charles secures first-class tickets for their honeymoon on the return voyage back to England on the RMS Titanic. Like the ill-fated ship, something happens that threatens to sink their plans and turn both their lives upside down. Is the wedding now off? Will Charles lose everything and be forced to take a train back to San Francisco?

My reaction: The Perfect Stranger is compelling historical novel with themes of secrets, betrayal, compassion, love, integrity, forgiveness set in the days train travel and of the renowned Titanic. I especially enjoyed the character of Nigel Whitaker, the father of the heroine Lily.

—–

Scandal at the Belmont

Book Blurb: It’s New York, the summer of 1914.
A shocking murder.
A wrongful arrest.
A city built on secrets.
A man who won’t back down.In the final golden days of the Gilded Age, before the world tilts toward World War I, Charles Bennington is a man with everything to lose. Two years after marrying the woman he loves, Lily Whitaker, he’s finally carved out the life he once only dreamed of—until a single phone call shatters the illusion. Her brother Cedric has just discovered a body…and the police believe he put it there. Charles never imagined he’d be fighting to save his brother-in-law from the electric chair. As a scandal erupts at the Hotel Belmont, Charles finds himself caught in a web of secrets, lies, and political corruption stretching to the highest levels of the Empire City. With the police unwilling to look any further, Charles is determined to clear Cedric’s name. He begins a perilous search, willing to risk everything to expose a truth that powerful men will kill to protect..My reaction: “Scandal at the Belmont” was the newspaper headline after the murder at the Hotel Belmont owned by Charles Bennington’s father-in-law. Charles’s brother-in-law is arrested for the murder–of his best friend. Everything points to his guilt, unless someone digs deeper–through corrupt webs of city government and power, and a family who believes in providential intervention. Scandal at the Belmont is a very satisfying historical novel..Dan Walsh

Dan Walsh is the bestselling author of 30 faith-based novels (all available on Amazon), including The Unfinished Gift (soon to become a movie), Rescuing Finley, When Night Comes, and The Reunion (also becoming a movie soon). Over 1.9 million copies of Dan’s books are in print or downloaded. They’ve received over 67,000 Amazon Reviews (4.7 Star Avg). He’s won both the Carol and Selah Awards multiple times, 4 of his novels have been finalists for RT Reviews Inspirational Novel of the Year.

Reviewers often remark about Dan’s rich, character-driven storylines and page-turning suspense (even with his inspirational books). He’s been writing full-time since 2010. He and his wife Cindi have been married 48 years, have 2 grown children and 6 grandchildren. They live in the Daytona Beach area, where Dan grew up. You can follow him on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, read his blog, or preview all his books on Amazon, or by visiting his website. He says they’re all easy to find on Google.

By following Dan Walsh on social media, you’ll learn he also has an adorable King Charles Spaniel named Finley.

I enjoyed this recent interview of Dan on A Writer’s Day Podcast, with fascinating backstory for his newest book.

“Daughtered Out”

The Neal girls’ quartet singing “Me and My Shadow” for the Bill Riley Talent Scouts program at the Earlham school in 1962. Bill Neal’s daughters are Jane and Judy in the middle. I’m on the left end, with my sister Gloria on the right–we’re Warren’s daughters.

While doing genealogy I ran into the term “daughtered out” and realized that term defined what happened to the Neals who descend from Kenneth and Ruby Neal.

This was especially important in passing along a family surname or inheritable property. If your father had only daughters, his line was daughtered out. Or if your father had only sisters, or brothers who all failed to produce male children, those daughters would lose their original surname when they got married.

Kenneth and Ruby Neal had two sons and three daughters who grew to adulthood and produced children. Both Dad (Warren) and Uncle Bill had two daughters and no sons.

Lts. Warren and Willis (Bill) Neal, Dallas County, Iowa, 1945. (Grandma’s crisscross curtains in the window.)

Both brothers served as pilots during World War II, returned to find farms to buy (three miles apart in NW Madison County, Iowa, south of Dexter), and never talked about the war. (Dad was an advanced instructor until near the end of the war, but Uncle Bill flew thirteen missions “over the Hump.”)

Most of the pictures we girls are in are with more “Neal cousins,” (with last names of Wells, Shepherd, and Beaman). I’m the oldest. Judy was born before her dad could get back from India and the Red Cross hadn’t reached him to let him know he had a baby girl. Jane and Gloria will turn 80 next July.

We Neal girls were used to being mixed up with each other. Gloria even went by her middle name (Jean), which made it more confusing.

When I was working on Meadowlark Songs, I couldn’t find anything about a family being “sonned out”–ending a motherline with only a son, like ours is. Guess it’s not a big deal inheritance-wise anymore.

Daughtered Out

The Neal girls’ quartet singing “Me and My Shadow” for the Bill Riley Talent Scouts program at the Earlham school in 1962. Bill Neal’s daughters are Jane and Judy in the middle. I’m on the left end, with my sister Gloria on the right–we’re Warren’s daughters.

While doing genealogy I ran into the term “daughtered out” and realized that term defined what happened to the Neals who descend from Kenneth and Ruby Neal.

This was especially important in passing along a family surname or inheritable property. If your father had only daughters, his line was daughtered out. Or if your father had only sisters, or brothers who all failed to produce male children, those daughters would lose their original surname when they got married.

Kenneth and Ruby Neal had two sons and three daughters who grew to adulthood and produced children. Both Dad (Warren) and Uncle Bill had two daughters and no sons.

Lts. Warren and Willis (Bill) Neal, Dallas County, Iowa, 1945. (Grandma’s crisscross curtains in the window.)

Both brothers served as pilots during World War II, returned to find farms to buy (three miles apart in NW Madison County, Iowa, south of Dexter), and never talked about the war. (Dad was an advanced instructor until near the end of the war, but Uncle Bill flew thirteen missions “over the Hump.”)

Most of the pictures we girls are in are with more “Neal cousins,” (with last names of Wells, Shepherd, and Beaman). I’m the oldest. Judy was born before her dad could get back from India and the Red Cross hadn’t reached him to let him know he had a baby girl. Jane and Gloria will turn 80 next July.

We Neal girls were used to being mixed up with each other. Gloria even went by her middle name (Jean), which made it more confusing.

When I was working on Meadowlark Songs, I couldn’t find anything about a family being “sonned out”–ending a motherline with only a son, like ours is. Guess it’s not a big deal inheritance-wise anymore.

What does it cost to join Kindle Unlimited?

You may have seen books marketed as “Free in Kindle Unlimited,” but what does that mean?

Kindle Unlimited is a $11.99 monthly subscription service offering access to digital books, audiobooks, comics, and magazines through Amazon. Users can borrow up to 20 titles at a time with no due dates, accessible on Kindles, smartphones, computers, and tablets via the Kindle app. I don’t know anyone enrolled in KU. 

Authors enrolled in KDP Select (Kindle Direct Publishing) earn royalties based on the number of pages read by subscribers, not the number of books borrowed. The payment amount fluctuates monthly and is determined by “a portion of a global fund that Amazon allocates.” While the exact per-page rate varies, it generally falls between $0.004 and $0.005. 

KU can expose books to a new audience that might not otherwise find them, especially if the authors are not well-known. I think that’s how readers find the Leora books, and they’ve been reading them steadily again now that summer is winding down. 

KU readers have read nearly 8000 pages of Leora books so far this month, over half of them in Leora’s Dexter Stories, the dear Depression Era book–in blue on the chart. Next is the WWII family story, Leora’s Letters (in gold), with less then half the pages read of Dexter Stories.

We live in amazing times, where people across the globe can learn about the remarkable times Grandma Leora here in the middle of Iowa!

Do you read many books on a Kindle or Nook?

A beautiful review of Meadowlark Songs by Lauren Scott

[Reviewed on Amazon.com]         Lauren Scott5.0 out of 5 stars A poetic culmination of excellent research into the depth of the women in the author’s life.

Reviewed in the United States on June 21, 2025

Verified Purchase

I was introduced to Joy Neal Kidney’s family history by reading Leora’s Letters, which is a book that touches on love, family, faith, loss, and resilience. Beautiful and heartbreaking. Meadowlark Songs offers the same effect: a culmination of excellent research into the depth of the women in Joy’s lineage. Through elegant poetry, prose, and priceless photographs, I was presented a window into seven generations, including the author who became “The Memory Keeper.” Guided by faith, each woman inspired the next, celebrating victories while encouraging strength and tenacity through loss and hardships. Every generational memory is one of love, admiration, and honor.

This book covers stories of farm life, of “Women in long dresses,” of good times and unimaginable sufferings. The genealogy began in Virginia but landed in the west where the Motherline planted roots in Iowa, the 29th State – five of the women lived in Guthrie County. Kidney’s account of her Motherline is poignant and highly recommended. A lovely example of her poetic voice is:

I Inherited Iowa

from ancestors’ long-ago decisions
to settle here, a land of small towns,
gravel roads to hike,
meadowlark songs,
the chirre of redwing blackbirds,

lilacs in spring, wild roses,
lilies of the field, the call of pheasants,
a neighborhood barred owl,
a pork chop on a stick at the Iowa State Fair,

the Milky Way sprinkled across night skies,
bur oaks sheltering pioneer graves,
bountiful autumns,
the hush of snowy Januarys.

The American flag gained two stars
while I was in high school,
the Pledge of Allegiance added two words,
“under God.”

Though I’ve traveled the nation
and abroad, I’m blessed by the choice
of those long-ago pilgrims
of Iowa, Beautiful Land.

—–

Thank you to Lauren for this winsome review.

Lauren Scott is a poet and author. Her latest book is King Copper: Our dog’s life in poetry. If you’ve ever loved and lost a pet, you’ll find this so compelling. (You’ll find my review on Amazon.) Here is her Amazon Author Page featuring all her other books.

Please check out Lauren’s website, Baydreamer Writes.

Goddess of Generosity: Sally Cronin

From her computer in Ireland, Sally Cronin has showered generosity across the globe through her Smorgasbord Books website for fourteen years. She’s branched out into themes, which she changes up from time to time, each one with fascinating individuals whether writers or musicians or other creatives.

Sally is especially keen to feature indie authors, so I’ve been a grateful recipient of her encouragement.

This has also enabled Sally to feature her own books, sharing chapters from one of her older ones, which is fun for those of us who’ve discovered her more recently.

One of her most important books is Size Always Matters. At age 41 in 1994 and weighing 330 lbs, Sally was given two choices if she hoped to live to 45. She could carry on eating or get her act together. She chose to study nutrition and change the way she approached the food she ate and her other lifestyle choices.

Smorgasbord Book Promotions.

Smorgasbord Summer Book Fair – My recommended books. Sally’s own choices.

Smorgasbord Summer Book Fair – New Book Spotlight.

Smorgasbord Short Stories.

Smorgasbord Music Column – William Price King.

Smorgasbord Blog Magazine Weekly Roundup.

You get the idea! Sally also shares and reshares others’ posts on various social media sites. All of us follow her blog benefit from having our work shared, but also getting acquainted with other authors and their books.

Please check out Sally’s Amazon Author Page with all her books listed.

I’ve especially enjoyed several of Sally’s books of poetry, including Variety is the Spice of Life, and following her father’s memoir of being in the Royal Navy on her website.

Thank you, Sally Cronin, for your generous encouragement!

Here’s her newest Smorgasbord Blogger Monthly – August 2025