Maureen Joseph's Blog - Posts Tagged "necropolis"
A Little Intro
Before I write anything down, I’d like to thank the few friends I have on social media and in real life for taking the time to either purchase my book or simply congratulate me- again, thank you. I really appreciate it.
After fifteen years of writing things for other people, I have decided to write something for, well, more other people-
People who aren’t looking for a campaign slogan or someone who needs me to write their book with an ironclad NDA. These people I am writing for represent a certain niche.
Let’s clear up a few things:
No, it is not a pornographic inspired saga. I am sorry to burst some of your bubbles out there. There is a love story. I am not a complete jerk. :)
This story is not about a woman who falls in love with a tycoon. It is fiction but quite relatable. There is drama, romance, dark humor with a sprinkle of macabre with a layer of sarcasm. However, there is a dollop of action, mystery and some murder; hence, the book title.
This is the first book of a saga. There is a book two. It is in the Gothic romance sub-genre but it does not mean you have to be a Goth to read it. Once, you read the book, you’ll understand. It is not only due to the setting.
I did not want this book to have your cookie-cutter cover with roses, masks, blood, etc. I worked with a few artists, who by reading the synopsis, were able to come up with a cover. I chose the abstract route on purpose. The colors contrast the struggles that our protagonist faces.
Without further ado, here’s the synopsis:
Polly Deuce is not your average undertaker. She loves MP3 players and is somewhat a luddite. She lived a non-eventful life in her little goth bubble till her childhood best friend, Michael Nabakov, turned her world upside down. For many years, he had managed to keep his identity and motives under wraps. Polly is caught between her guilt with the familiarity of Michael's presence and a strange yearning for his dark pursuer.
If you are interested in purchasing this book in paperback or format form, it is available in the link in my bio.
Thank you all.
After fifteen years of writing things for other people, I have decided to write something for, well, more other people-
People who aren’t looking for a campaign slogan or someone who needs me to write their book with an ironclad NDA. These people I am writing for represent a certain niche.
Let’s clear up a few things:
No, it is not a pornographic inspired saga. I am sorry to burst some of your bubbles out there. There is a love story. I am not a complete jerk. :)
This story is not about a woman who falls in love with a tycoon. It is fiction but quite relatable. There is drama, romance, dark humor with a sprinkle of macabre with a layer of sarcasm. However, there is a dollop of action, mystery and some murder; hence, the book title.
This is the first book of a saga. There is a book two. It is in the Gothic romance sub-genre but it does not mean you have to be a Goth to read it. Once, you read the book, you’ll understand. It is not only due to the setting.
I did not want this book to have your cookie-cutter cover with roses, masks, blood, etc. I worked with a few artists, who by reading the synopsis, were able to come up with a cover. I chose the abstract route on purpose. The colors contrast the struggles that our protagonist faces.
Without further ado, here’s the synopsis:
Polly Deuce is not your average undertaker. She loves MP3 players and is somewhat a luddite. She lived a non-eventful life in her little goth bubble till her childhood best friend, Michael Nabakov, turned her world upside down. For many years, he had managed to keep his identity and motives under wraps. Polly is caught between her guilt with the familiarity of Michael's presence and a strange yearning for his dark pursuer.
If you are interested in purchasing this book in paperback or format form, it is available in the link in my bio.
Thank you all.
Published on March 02, 2019 16:43
•
Tags:
cemetery, dark-humor, fiction, goth-girl, gothauthor, gothic, gothromance, macabre, necropolis, plot, saga, sarcasm, tombstone, undertaker
The Eyes of Limning Book Covers
I have read many books of different genres. Most of these books have a common denominator in reference to their genre: their book cover. We all can spot certain books of certain genres from a mile away because of their book cover. Heck, we can even guess the genre or plot just by looking at the cover. Sometimes, we even buy those books without throwing a glance at the summary or blurb on the back because of the cover. Not all of us depend on the media's hype to buy a book. I personally don't. If you do, there is nothing wrong with that.
You go to a bookstore. You skim through endless books of your favorite genre. At times, you may not be able to pick anything. Then, you decide to pick a different subcategory of your favorite genre. You may ditch the genre altogether and opt for a different flavor. You spot it afar, right across the room, you walk up to that book. You start to examine the cover and the spine, maybe flip through its pages. Suddenly, you find yourself buying the damn thing because of the cover. You go home to find out that it was just a pretty face with empty promises. It happens but not always.
The very first time I picked up an unattractive book was when I was fifteen. Well, to me at the time, it was unattractive. It was a book by my favorite writer: Dean Koontz. I had never heard of him before picking up that book. Mind you, I had already read the Pit and The Pendulum too many times. The book was entitled The Eyes of Darkness. That was my first Dean Koontz novel. It was a gray cover with a picture of a window. Nothing here to see. The title really captured my attention. I read the first six pages and twelve hours later during my summer vacation, I finished the book. I was mesmerized. My fifteen year old mind was floored. Every year I made sure to have that book on my summer reading list.
Till this day, I really don't pay attention to Dean Koontz's book covers. Actually, his name overshadows the book cover's art. I am okay with that because, to me, he is art himself.
As a Gothic author, and I use this term conservatively to make a point, I did not want my book to be defined by one genre of readers. The setting is Gothic. There is somewhat a certain Gothic allure; think Daphne Du Maurier.
I did not want a rose with a Gregorian themed background, I did not want a Baroque spine. Don't get me wrong, all those are beautiful and I make sure to show those books off with such art at my home. It was for everyone but me.
People who have read my book can tell you the abstractedness aspect of it. I took a risk and chose an abstract painting made especially for my book. After working with a few gifted artists, I chose one. He is a renowned abstract artist Chucrallah Fattouh. He did something what no artist saw in the aspect of my book. He sketched it on a napkin and weeks later sent me a picture of the painting. His work is in no way of the macabre Gothic genre. He was able to dig deep into the soul of the protagonist and limn the complexities and abstractedness she was facing into this painting. This is how he saw her through his style of art -through his eyes. I thank him for that.
I like to think of this as a Lee Krasner situation. She did not define her art as one style. She often tore her own paintings up and made them into collages. One of her most famous paintings is the Gothic Landscape. A complex piece of agony and beauty. Her other works are somewhat a contrast to this. Many critics dislike this aspect of Krasner. I don't. She was merely limning what she thought and did not say...
You go to a bookstore. You skim through endless books of your favorite genre. At times, you may not be able to pick anything. Then, you decide to pick a different subcategory of your favorite genre. You may ditch the genre altogether and opt for a different flavor. You spot it afar, right across the room, you walk up to that book. You start to examine the cover and the spine, maybe flip through its pages. Suddenly, you find yourself buying the damn thing because of the cover. You go home to find out that it was just a pretty face with empty promises. It happens but not always.
The very first time I picked up an unattractive book was when I was fifteen. Well, to me at the time, it was unattractive. It was a book by my favorite writer: Dean Koontz. I had never heard of him before picking up that book. Mind you, I had already read the Pit and The Pendulum too many times. The book was entitled The Eyes of Darkness. That was my first Dean Koontz novel. It was a gray cover with a picture of a window. Nothing here to see. The title really captured my attention. I read the first six pages and twelve hours later during my summer vacation, I finished the book. I was mesmerized. My fifteen year old mind was floored. Every year I made sure to have that book on my summer reading list.
Till this day, I really don't pay attention to Dean Koontz's book covers. Actually, his name overshadows the book cover's art. I am okay with that because, to me, he is art himself.
As a Gothic author, and I use this term conservatively to make a point, I did not want my book to be defined by one genre of readers. The setting is Gothic. There is somewhat a certain Gothic allure; think Daphne Du Maurier.
I did not want a rose with a Gregorian themed background, I did not want a Baroque spine. Don't get me wrong, all those are beautiful and I make sure to show those books off with such art at my home. It was for everyone but me.
People who have read my book can tell you the abstractedness aspect of it. I took a risk and chose an abstract painting made especially for my book. After working with a few gifted artists, I chose one. He is a renowned abstract artist Chucrallah Fattouh. He did something what no artist saw in the aspect of my book. He sketched it on a napkin and weeks later sent me a picture of the painting. His work is in no way of the macabre Gothic genre. He was able to dig deep into the soul of the protagonist and limn the complexities and abstractedness she was facing into this painting. This is how he saw her through his style of art -through his eyes. I thank him for that.
I like to think of this as a Lee Krasner situation. She did not define her art as one style. She often tore her own paintings up and made them into collages. One of her most famous paintings is the Gothic Landscape. A complex piece of agony and beauty. Her other works are somewhat a contrast to this. Many critics dislike this aspect of Krasner. I don't. She was merely limning what she thought and did not say...
Published on April 02, 2019 17:02
•
Tags:
cemetery, dark-humor, goth-girl, gothauthor, gothic, gothromance, macabre, necropolis, plot, saga, sarcasm, tombstone, undertaker
Not My Style
I had the opportunity the other day to sit down with a former colleague. I had worked with him on many campaigns as a copywriter. I am pretty sure he is reading this blog right now and is building himself a pedestal as we speak. We would spend hours with our other colleagues brainstorming over campaigns. I would get to pick the music sometimes. It was an eye-opener for many at the office. Every time I would play a song, he would utter the same three words: " Not My Style." But he could not change the music because everyone had to have a turn picking the music for that long evening of brainstorming. It was some form of group togetherness exercise he religiously made us follow. I personally did not like listening to music where people sang about their genitals, yet there we were at the time.
My former colleague knew I was writing a book a while back. When he used to ask what it was about, I would answer something vague along the lines of 'fiction goth-romance'. He would always answer with a ' Not Your Style'. You work with someone for a long time and they think...they think....they have you all figured out. Fast forward, three years later, I publish my book and I did not announce it to him. He finds out from a mutual business acquaintance. He buys the book, reads it and a few days later calls me to meet up for coffee. I thought he only needed me to look over a campaign. I was wrong.
There he was, sitting at the coffee shop with my book in his hand. I could see post-its tabbing the damn thing. He was treating it like the campaign files I would give him where he would put his notes with those ugly post-its. What in the stationary hell was going on here? I sat down in front of him. He bashfully pushes a cup of black coffee towards me. He then says: "Why didn't you tell me?" I was genuinely confused. " Tell you what?"
He opens the book with all the damn post-its. He had made notes and comments. He then says: " I started reading this like I would read your hooks or corporate identities. I put those post-its for notes. I could never imagine someone like you, who loves Monday mornings could write something so beautiful. The genre is in no way my style but I could not put it down. It is Not My Style. I am not comfortable with that. I need book two. I thought I knew your style of writing."
I took a sip of my coffee and said: "I am not comfortable with your latest marketing campaign but here were are."
My former colleague knew I was writing a book a while back. When he used to ask what it was about, I would answer something vague along the lines of 'fiction goth-romance'. He would always answer with a ' Not Your Style'. You work with someone for a long time and they think...they think....they have you all figured out. Fast forward, three years later, I publish my book and I did not announce it to him. He finds out from a mutual business acquaintance. He buys the book, reads it and a few days later calls me to meet up for coffee. I thought he only needed me to look over a campaign. I was wrong.
There he was, sitting at the coffee shop with my book in his hand. I could see post-its tabbing the damn thing. He was treating it like the campaign files I would give him where he would put his notes with those ugly post-its. What in the stationary hell was going on here? I sat down in front of him. He bashfully pushes a cup of black coffee towards me. He then says: "Why didn't you tell me?" I was genuinely confused. " Tell you what?"
He opens the book with all the damn post-its. He had made notes and comments. He then says: " I started reading this like I would read your hooks or corporate identities. I put those post-its for notes. I could never imagine someone like you, who loves Monday mornings could write something so beautiful. The genre is in no way my style but I could not put it down. It is Not My Style. I am not comfortable with that. I need book two. I thought I knew your style of writing."
I took a sip of my coffee and said: "I am not comfortable with your latest marketing campaign but here were are."
Published on April 18, 2019 20:41
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Tags:
cemetery, dark-humor, goth-girl, gothauthor, gothic, gothromance, macabre, necropolis, plot, saga, sarcasm, tombstone, undertaker
Chaise Longue or Chaise Lounge?
It's been three months since I have published my book. I know, I am a new author. I do not have the experience of other authors. There may be things that I do not understand like wondering why other authors, or people, follow you on social media to only unfollow you later on. Many people have this inane need to do things to feel important. It feeds their ego. Everyone has an ego to some degree. I have it and you have it. It is responsible for one's sense of personal identity and how they fare with reality. Social media is anything but that. I think you have all heard this before.
People with such big egos have never ceased to amaze me. I study them and take their words into consideration. They are the bread and butter to my 99 Ways on How to Spear a Person with a Lucky Bamboo. However, I had the joy of having a few of those malaperts grace my direct messages on one of my social media accounts. They had downloaded my eBook during its promotion.
One of them so boldly explained to me that I should fire my editor because ' Chaise Longue' had been misspelled. This person said it was 'Chaise Lounge'. Another malapert explained that it was a chair you lounge in, to chill and hang out. They also mentioned that I should learn English. For those of you who had not read the book, my main character has a chaise longue in her room. It is a piece of furniture she holds very dear to her heart.
Nevertheless, it took me a while to get back to my malaperts because I had prior email correspondences that needed my immediate attention. One afternoon, while avoiding the sun and going through my direct messages, I decided to confront one of my malaperts. I asked him if he had done a quick Google search before running his expert mouth.
I got no answer. He saw the message. I proceeded to tell him that I understood his frustration of not being able to utilize the internet for anything else but for the amount of likes he gets for his photoshopped ego. I bet him my left kidney that he had never read any of the books he showed on his page. He was still reading the messages and not answering. I explained to him that 'Chaise Longue' is a French word meaning; long chair. It is a loan word like 'Rendez-vous'. The term 'Chaise Lounge' is nothing but a linguistic support for people who spoke English. The latter was first used in the early 1900s.
Two days later, my malapert tells me that he did not appreciate me schooling him on such a common word.
There we go with that ego!
I asked him if it would make him feel better to call it a long chair that one lounges in? He did not take kindly to my suggestion. Till this day, I can hear the sound of him toggling the block button on his phone. C'était magique.
People with such big egos have never ceased to amaze me. I study them and take their words into consideration. They are the bread and butter to my 99 Ways on How to Spear a Person with a Lucky Bamboo. However, I had the joy of having a few of those malaperts grace my direct messages on one of my social media accounts. They had downloaded my eBook during its promotion.
One of them so boldly explained to me that I should fire my editor because ' Chaise Longue' had been misspelled. This person said it was 'Chaise Lounge'. Another malapert explained that it was a chair you lounge in, to chill and hang out. They also mentioned that I should learn English. For those of you who had not read the book, my main character has a chaise longue in her room. It is a piece of furniture she holds very dear to her heart.
Nevertheless, it took me a while to get back to my malaperts because I had prior email correspondences that needed my immediate attention. One afternoon, while avoiding the sun and going through my direct messages, I decided to confront one of my malaperts. I asked him if he had done a quick Google search before running his expert mouth.
I got no answer. He saw the message. I proceeded to tell him that I understood his frustration of not being able to utilize the internet for anything else but for the amount of likes he gets for his photoshopped ego. I bet him my left kidney that he had never read any of the books he showed on his page. He was still reading the messages and not answering. I explained to him that 'Chaise Longue' is a French word meaning; long chair. It is a loan word like 'Rendez-vous'. The term 'Chaise Lounge' is nothing but a linguistic support for people who spoke English. The latter was first used in the early 1900s.
Two days later, my malapert tells me that he did not appreciate me schooling him on such a common word.
There we go with that ego!
I asked him if it would make him feel better to call it a long chair that one lounges in? He did not take kindly to my suggestion. Till this day, I can hear the sound of him toggling the block button on his phone. C'était magique.
Published on June 12, 2019 18:08
•
Tags:
cemetery, dark-humor, ego, french, goth-girl, gothauthor, gothic, gothromance, grammar, macabre, necropolis, plot, sarcasm, undertaker
My Cross, Your Burden
It was a normal day when I decided to upload a picture with an excerpt from my book on one of my social media platforms. It pertained to my protagonist’s footwear and an excerpt from one of Twice The Demise’s chapters. I quoted the following: “What I considered a career, you considered a fault.” This statement was uttered by Polly, the protagonist, to a former beau. They ran into each other (like we all do with our exes) and, terse but not unkind, words were exchanged. He could not accept the fact that she was working with the dead. The unconventional job of an undertaker was one of the major reasons for their fall-out.
Not giving it a second thought, I posted and went on my merry way. The post received likes and maybe a comment. Lo and behold, my inbox had over twenty messages. Followers, from readers to friends, were in my DMs telling me stories relating to this statement. I wondered, if one related so much to this, why not comment publicly? It was a fair question. I was no relationship expert. The common answer they all had was -they didn’t want to openly share their experiences on Instagram. Most of these people had public accounts with their exes always lurking with a ‘finsta’. I learned that a Finsta is a fake Instagram account mostly used by people who no longer are in your life but still want to know what is going on with you…. complicated much? Followers did not want these people to know how much it still hurt. Social mores kind of dictates that with airing out one’s dirty laundry. I get it.
You may love the idea of dating a doctor, but can you handle their hours? How about a ballroom dancer who has to be in close proximity to the opposite sex all the time? How about an artist who paints naked portraits? An undertaker who reeks of death? I gave a few extreme examples due to their social allure. These career paths exude some type of charm and whimsicalness but become repulsive to our significant other. The realization of the work and dedication these careers entail may be a rude wakening. The significant other begins to view our lifestyle as a burden to their insecurities. Alas, the curse of romanticizing everything!
This is no different than wanting a wedding but not a marriage. Wanting to beat Joey Chestnut without a commitment to gastritis. Wanting to bear children but not parent them. Wanting to have a house but not being able to keep up with the mortgage. The list is endless. In a nutshell, we want what we can’t have and sometimes have what we can’t handle; or what we thought we could handle.
To all the exes….
No, my career is not your cross to bear.
Don’t go laying your insecurities on my cross.
Not giving it a second thought, I posted and went on my merry way. The post received likes and maybe a comment. Lo and behold, my inbox had over twenty messages. Followers, from readers to friends, were in my DMs telling me stories relating to this statement. I wondered, if one related so much to this, why not comment publicly? It was a fair question. I was no relationship expert. The common answer they all had was -they didn’t want to openly share their experiences on Instagram. Most of these people had public accounts with their exes always lurking with a ‘finsta’. I learned that a Finsta is a fake Instagram account mostly used by people who no longer are in your life but still want to know what is going on with you…. complicated much? Followers did not want these people to know how much it still hurt. Social mores kind of dictates that with airing out one’s dirty laundry. I get it.
You may love the idea of dating a doctor, but can you handle their hours? How about a ballroom dancer who has to be in close proximity to the opposite sex all the time? How about an artist who paints naked portraits? An undertaker who reeks of death? I gave a few extreme examples due to their social allure. These career paths exude some type of charm and whimsicalness but become repulsive to our significant other. The realization of the work and dedication these careers entail may be a rude wakening. The significant other begins to view our lifestyle as a burden to their insecurities. Alas, the curse of romanticizing everything!
This is no different than wanting a wedding but not a marriage. Wanting to beat Joey Chestnut without a commitment to gastritis. Wanting to bear children but not parent them. Wanting to have a house but not being able to keep up with the mortgage. The list is endless. In a nutshell, we want what we can’t have and sometimes have what we can’t handle; or what we thought we could handle.
To all the exes….
No, my career is not your cross to bear.
Don’t go laying your insecurities on my cross.
Published on March 12, 2020 19:55
•
Tags:
cemetery, dark-humor, ego, french, goth-girl, gothauthor, gothic, gothromance, grammar, macabre, necropolis, plot, sarcasm, undertaker
Pillow-Screaming
I did not want to hop on that gravy train. I did not. There is no gravy, yet we have a train.
A grave train…
See what I did there?
Screaming into a pillow for almost two weeks does that to a person. People dying left and right. Friends, distant relatives in other countries, patients, customers; have your pick.
Silent screams into my pillow. It is amazing how one can master the art of silent screams and sobs.
Sobs are inaudible spasmic contractions in one’s throat. You feel that tightening in your chest, the back of your throat constricted to a point where you cannot breathe. You cannot strangle yourself with your own bare hands to death; there is a part of your brain that won’t allow you to do that, therefore you involuntarily release your hands. Please don’t try this anywhere.
Studies claim screaming into a pillow alleviates stress and reduces negative feelings. Obviously, these studies have not taken white linen pillows that smell like bleach into consideration. Quite intoxicating I say. Yeah, I use a bit too much bleach after dying my hair indigo black. Alas, sue me! I bet I will have a few dry cleaning experts in my comments or inbox. Everyone is an expert online.
Don’t believe me?
I bet you my left enlarged thyroid and right imaginary nut-sack that everyone on the internet is a doctor, nurse, lawyer, vet, military expert, arms expert, chef, construction worker, engineer, banker and is a PhD candidate writing a dissertation about Mahler’s Symphony no.5. Everyone is an expert. Everyone is an expert on mental health. Ah, you didn’t know? Check your Instagram for all the “Life Coaches”, “Wellness Experts” and “Mental Health Awareness Gurus” online. They follow thousands of people in troves just to unfollow. No matter how much you interact with these people. They will unfollow. I’ll tell you. They don’t care about anyone. Mental health has become the money-making Hallmark Card of people’s well-being. That is dangerous; no different than taking meds or eating something you shouldn’t.
No, this is not a rant. Just an observation.
Whoever is reading this blog, if someone’s social media has been inactive for a few weeks, reach out to that person. It is remarkably simple. No need to be a “Mental Health Specialist” or a rocket scientist to give it a second thought. I am not referring to emotional vampires, abusive people and fair-weathered friends. This is my second PSA in this article. Welcome to 2020.
I want to know where these internet experts get their fast-tracked degrees. I feel like a complete dunce most of the time. Here I am sticking to things that I know. I get it. I am too comfortable admitting that I don’t know enough about something to form an opinion. Might as well take me to that back and shoot me. I, for one, have fallen victim to acquaintances who suffer from The Dunning-Kruger Effect.
Nevertheless, the best experts out there are people without children. Have I mentioned that everyone is a great parent with a fluorescent halo before having kids? Those are my favorite type. Unsolicited advice about wiping a child’s snot to a kid throwing a tantrum in a video. All those diagnoses from different types of internet medical experts. Try doing tequila shots while going through comments. Each new diagnosis, you take a shot. One would be drunk by the fourth commentator.
As I finish writing this, I will go back to screaming into my pillow or maybe have my neighbors listen to the new My Dying Bride album with me. I have yet to listen to it and form an opinion. Maybe I’ll go online later and argue with a few experts like myself. Didn’t you know? I have a degree in Mosh Pitting and Head Banging. Take that, Pillow-Screaming!
A grave train…
See what I did there?
Screaming into a pillow for almost two weeks does that to a person. People dying left and right. Friends, distant relatives in other countries, patients, customers; have your pick.
Silent screams into my pillow. It is amazing how one can master the art of silent screams and sobs.
Sobs are inaudible spasmic contractions in one’s throat. You feel that tightening in your chest, the back of your throat constricted to a point where you cannot breathe. You cannot strangle yourself with your own bare hands to death; there is a part of your brain that won’t allow you to do that, therefore you involuntarily release your hands. Please don’t try this anywhere.
Studies claim screaming into a pillow alleviates stress and reduces negative feelings. Obviously, these studies have not taken white linen pillows that smell like bleach into consideration. Quite intoxicating I say. Yeah, I use a bit too much bleach after dying my hair indigo black. Alas, sue me! I bet I will have a few dry cleaning experts in my comments or inbox. Everyone is an expert online.
Don’t believe me?
I bet you my left enlarged thyroid and right imaginary nut-sack that everyone on the internet is a doctor, nurse, lawyer, vet, military expert, arms expert, chef, construction worker, engineer, banker and is a PhD candidate writing a dissertation about Mahler’s Symphony no.5. Everyone is an expert. Everyone is an expert on mental health. Ah, you didn’t know? Check your Instagram for all the “Life Coaches”, “Wellness Experts” and “Mental Health Awareness Gurus” online. They follow thousands of people in troves just to unfollow. No matter how much you interact with these people. They will unfollow. I’ll tell you. They don’t care about anyone. Mental health has become the money-making Hallmark Card of people’s well-being. That is dangerous; no different than taking meds or eating something you shouldn’t.
No, this is not a rant. Just an observation.
Whoever is reading this blog, if someone’s social media has been inactive for a few weeks, reach out to that person. It is remarkably simple. No need to be a “Mental Health Specialist” or a rocket scientist to give it a second thought. I am not referring to emotional vampires, abusive people and fair-weathered friends. This is my second PSA in this article. Welcome to 2020.
I want to know where these internet experts get their fast-tracked degrees. I feel like a complete dunce most of the time. Here I am sticking to things that I know. I get it. I am too comfortable admitting that I don’t know enough about something to form an opinion. Might as well take me to that back and shoot me. I, for one, have fallen victim to acquaintances who suffer from The Dunning-Kruger Effect.
Nevertheless, the best experts out there are people without children. Have I mentioned that everyone is a great parent with a fluorescent halo before having kids? Those are my favorite type. Unsolicited advice about wiping a child’s snot to a kid throwing a tantrum in a video. All those diagnoses from different types of internet medical experts. Try doing tequila shots while going through comments. Each new diagnosis, you take a shot. One would be drunk by the fourth commentator.
As I finish writing this, I will go back to screaming into my pillow or maybe have my neighbors listen to the new My Dying Bride album with me. I have yet to listen to it and form an opinion. Maybe I’ll go online later and argue with a few experts like myself. Didn’t you know? I have a degree in Mosh Pitting and Head Banging. Take that, Pillow-Screaming!
Published on April 27, 2020 22:18
•
Tags:
cemetery, dark-humor, ego, expert, french, goth-girl, gothauthor, gothic, gothromance, grammar, humor, macabre, mentalhealth, necropolis, plot, sarcasm, undertaker