Charlie Foxtrot's Blog, page 3

Understanding Character Depth Through the Lens of Who

I recently started to get caught up on Writing Excuses, Season 20 while commenting into work. Specifically, Episode 5: Lens 1 – Who. The discussion introduces “the lens of who” — which means talking about characters. This is a great refresher on making characters that are multi-dimensional by showing them through different “lenses”. A key take-away is the idea that our characters have different sets of experiences, which should mean if they each described the same think, they most likely would have different takes on the scene or event. 

While I don’t want to spoil the whole episode, there were a couple ideas I latched onto around crafting a character background or back story. The ideas were questions writers should ask and answer about their characters to give them greater depth and context for how they view the world. The questions are:

“What is the lie your character believes about the world?”

And:

“What is the truth your character is afraid to learn?”

These may be related to one another, or completely different, depending on the character, author, and story. If the author knows the answers to these questions, they can craft details that will make the character more real for the reader. Let’s see how I can retroactively answer these for one of my recent characters, without creating story spoilers.

Finn is one of the main characters from Technomancer. While it is never really said in the book, he believes that an intelligent individual of strong character can successfully battle entrenched evil in the government. This is a lie, though it is open to debate, obviously. The truth he is afraid to learn is that the rational rules of science he believes in cannot explain the world he is transported into. He struggles to learn more, observe more, and make his observations fit this worldview. Unfortunately, the things that happen to him do not actually fit into his view of how the world operates. His view does not address the reality of gods and chaos that permeate Elara’s realms., though he continues to try and shoehorn things into a scientific mindset.

I think these two elements come through in the tale, but you readers will have to weigh in and let me know if I’ve succeeded. 

I’ll be adding these questions to my Character Template available for download by subscribers. I encourage you to listen to the podcast as well as subscribe here to get the templates.

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Technomancer is available on Kindle

Technomancer is available for Kindle.

I am working with some reviewers to get more marketing material and reviewer comments, after which I will enroll it in KDP Select for three months. The KDP Select program is supposed to reach more readers, since Kindle Unlimited readers can read your book without buying the full Kindle edition. KDP Select works can also be advertised and promoted on the Amazon platform. Stay tuned for updates as these next steps are taken for marketing the book.

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Balancing Real Life and Fictional Worlds

Sorry for the break in posting. I’ve been busy working to make ends meet with my real job and fallen off the writing bandwagon a little. Now that I’m being productive in the real world, I’m ready to jump back into the fictional worlds in my head. 

I’ve been toying with two story ideas that I think could make interesting tales. Both are set in more of a modern fantasy genre with heavy elements of the real world, which means the characters, settings, and conflicts are going to have to be something readers can relate to. 

“Skipper”

The most advanced idea (I’ve gotten about 35,000 words written) tackles the trope of time-travel/reincarnation where the main character dies at the beginning of the story and is sent back to their younger self with a chance at doing things over. This is the same macro-plot I used in the A New Past trilogy. However, this idea takes a different twist where the main character doesn’t go back to their younger self, but rather to a family member in the previous generation. So, instead of reincarnating in themselves, they are born as their uncle, or father, or grandfather, etc. 

This obviously creates a possibility of them creating a paradox, which can be a form of conflict. If they change things, maybe they won’t even be born, so the stakes are high. However, there are a few other twists I’ve got in mind that may make it more interesting.

”Small Powers”

The second idea is based on a random thought about superheroes and special powers. In all of the comic book tropes, some event happens that transforms the character into a super-powered hero or villain. My random thought was what powers would look like if they were more naturally emergent. What if they were little powers that could not do all that much on their own? 

I think this has the potential to make the characters much more relatable and interesting. Obviously, if they are in our contemporary world, they will have enough paranoia to not reveal their powers unless they want to risk the government swooping in to study them, or recruit them for some secret cabal. At the same time, they will feel isolated since they can’t share what is happening to them. I’ve written about 25,000 words on this story, so it is developing as well.

Long forms

Both of these tales are running long for me. Each are roughly a third or a quarter of the length I would like the final novels to be (roughly 120,000 words or less). I’m worried I’m not editing enough as I go, but decided after grinding through Technomancer in four months at 117,000 words, that I would let my muse take me where she will.

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Marketing Mondays: The Synopsis Conundrum

Yesterday, I shared some of my efforts at creating a marketing synopsis for Technomancer. While the book is not posted for purchase yet, I need the summary for the sales pages on various sights, and also want to have a slug I can share with potential reviewers.

A synopsis can be a writer’s nemesis but also the most sought-after selling tool. But how do we do it justice without sacrificing the integrity of our story?

In today’s digital age, a well-crafted synopsis is more crucial than ever. It’s often the first impression potential readers have of your book, and can make or break their decision to buy. So, how do you write a synopsis that will entice readers without selling them short?

The Challenges of Writing a Synopsis

Compression vs. Clarity: How much information can we realistically include in 500 words (or less)? The danger is in losing the essence of your story or oversimplifying it to the point of clarity.Tone and Voice: A synopsis should be written in the same tone as the book itself, but this can be tricky to achieve. Do you stick to a formal, objective voice or inject some personality?Avoid Spoilers: You want to entice readers without giving away too much of the story. This delicate balance is crucial.Focusing on the Core: What’s the heart of your novel? Is it a character’s journey, a plot twist, or a world-building concept? Make sure you highlight these key elements.

Tips for Writing an Engaging Synopsis

Start with a Hook: Grab readers’ attention with a compelling opening sentence or two.Focus on the Main Character: Introduce your protagonist and convey their drive, motivation, and conflict.Highlight the Stakes: What do the characters stand to gain or lose? Make this clear to create tension and urgency.Use Active Voice: Keep your writing concise and engaging by using active voice instead of passive.Emphasize Themes: What themes does your book explore? Give readers a sense of what they can expect from your story.

Examples of Effective Synopses

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen (1813)
Jane Austen’s 1813 romantic novel Pride and Prejudice follows Elizabeth, the second eldest of the five Bennet sisters, known for her wit and intelligence. The Bennets live comfortably in the English countryside, but there’s one big problem: Since Mr. Bennet’s estate can only be passed down to a male heir, it’s imperative that at least one sisters marry before their father dies. Things get complicated when Mr. Bingley, a wealthy bachelor, moves into town and appears to take an interest in Jane, the eldest Bennet sister. The friendly Mr. Bingley stands in contrast to his (even wealthier) friend Mr. Darcy, who snubs Elizabeth, earning a reputation for snobbishness that is seemingly confirmed when he later discourages Mr. Bingley from proposing to Jane. Meanwhile, Bingley isn’t the only man with desires for the Bennet sisters. As they navigate proposals, friendship, and family, both Jane and Mr. Darcy begin to realize they may have judged one another too harshly. (Link to original post.)Look at this concise, engaging synopsis for The Hate U Give by Angie Thomas, which captures the essence of the story in just a few sentences.

Conclusion

Writing a compelling synopsis is an art form that requires careful consideration. By focusing on your core story elements, using active voice, and crafting a hook-laden opening, you can entice readers to buy your book without sacrificing its integrity. Remember, the goal is not to summarize every detail but to capture the essence of your novel and pique their interest.

A well-crafted synopsis can give readers a glimpse into your world, and they might just fall in love with your story.

Share Your Thoughts!

What challenges do you face when writing a synopsis? How do you approach this task? Share your experiences and tips in the comments below!

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Technomancer: Beta Readers Wanted

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Crafting a Compelling Book Summary

Summarizing a novel always feels tough for me. Maybe I’m too close to the content and want too many details in the summary. Maybe I don’t know what really engages potential readers to attract their interest. Now that I’ve finished polishing my first draft of Technomancer, I need to come up with a punchy summary that will make readers want to buy the book. This post will cover these attempts.

First Pass:

The first teaser I drafted was simple, straight forward, and utterly un-engaging (even to me):

Sinister forces have captured Elara in her magical realm and forced her out into a world of strange technology. Finn, an engineer in that world is fighting his own shadow-battle against the surveillance regime he once helped build. Together, they face overwhelming odds to fight for justice.

At least the teaser is short, under 300 characters and about 50 words, but I don’t think it really tells much about why readers would want to download a sample and eventually read the novel. Time to try again.

Second Attempt

Elara, a young priestess of the Moon Goddess, is captured, cursed, and transported to a technologically advanced world to search for a person of power. Thrown together with Finn, a brilliant but reclusive engineer, she joins him to expose the corrupt forces exploiting technology for gain and bring about justice. A thrilling tale of intrigue, magic, technology, and self-discovery.

This isn’t bad. It stays under 400 characters (60 words), and makes some promises about the story that should appeal to readers. It may be a good enough summary, but I don’t think it really covers the breadth of the story. I want a few more details to engage readers, so will give it one more go.

Third Time

Immerse yourself in a world where ancient magic collides with cutting-edge technology.

In a realm where magic, balance and caring reign supreme, a young priestess named Elara is ripped from her sacred duties and transported to a strange, technology filled land. Her connection to the Moon Goddess – the source of her power and guidance – is shattered by a dark and powerful spell, leaving her vulnerable to the whims of an evil magician.

As Elara navigates this unfamiliar world, she must confront the sinister forces that seek to control her every move. But she’s not alone. Finn, a brilliant and enigmatic engineer, joins her quest, bringing his expertise in the fight against
corrupt forces that exploit technology for their own gain.

Together, they embark on a heart-pumping adventure to expose the truth and bring justice to a world on the brink of chaos. With the spell whispering dark instructions in her mind, Elara must confront the shadows within herself and decide where her true loyalties lie. Will she find the strength to overcome the magician’s control and forge her own path, or will she become a pawn in a larger game of power and deception?

Dive into this electrifying tale of magic, technology, and self-discovery, where the boundaries between good and evil are tested, and the true meaning of courage and loyalty is revealed. Join Elara and Finn on their perilous quest to reclaim their world and uncover the secrets that will change everything.

This is obviously quite a bit longer (250 words), but I think it also does a better job of focusing on one of the main characters and introduces several of the conflicts that are involved in her journey.

I’ve shared the opening chapters of Technomancer in prior posts. I’ll be opening up a beta reader process soon for people who have subscribed to my blog. The beta reader process will include free access to the completed book in trade for specific feedback on the story. What do you think? Leave a comment and subscribe if you are interested in signing up as a beta reader. Stay tuned to learn more!

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Balancing Romance and Sci-Fi: A Character Study

One of the problems with writing Erotic Science Fiction is the fact that many potential readers assume the focus is on the erotic elements rather than the underlying science fiction and general plot. To try and overcome this perception, I’m sharing some excerpts from my series, A New Past to share some of the “non-erotic” elements. This excerpt is from chapter sixteen of Book One and deals with family troubles for the main characters.

I drove home and decided I needed to fill Mom and Jim in on what was happening.  Mom was none too happy, but seemed to resolve herself to the fact that Janet was overreacting.

“Paul, we’ve talked many times, so I know you do love Jeryl.  I don’t believe it is the typical high school love that will fade in a few weeks or years.  When I see you two together, you remind me of myself and your father, or Jim and myself.  You treat her with love and respect as a partner, not as a playmate.

“You both have to realize that parents loving their children is a different kind of love.  We want to protect you and spend a long time in that role.  Over time, it becomes habit.  Sometimes it’s hard to let go and let you feel the pain that can come from adult decisions.  You and Jeryl have made plenty of adult decisions, but this one is a decision that Janet feels strongly about.  For some reason, she fixates on it.”

“She does.  All three girls have mentioned it.”

“Well, until she can resolve that fixation, she is not going to be willing to let go.  What I’d ask you to do, is make sure Jeryl doesn’t let this turn into her own fixation.  Don’t let her allow this to define the future of her relationship with her family.”

“I won’t.”  I knew the sense of loss I had felt the first time through, growing up without a father.  I would not let Jeryl experience that.  “Thanks for listening.”

I was surprised to see Jeryl’s Range Rover pull into the yard a couple of hours later.  I was more surprised to see Jerry get out from behind the driver’s seat and head toward our door.  Jim and I met him on the deck.  I think Jim was looking for a shotgun.

“Paul, can I talk to you for a bit?” he asked without preamble.

“Certainly, sir.”

We headed out to the office in the shop.  Jerry seemed a little lost as we sat down.  Finally, he collected his thoughts.  “Paul, I told you once that I believe you’re good for Jeryl.  I still do.  She has blossomed into a beautiful, charming young lady while she has been going out with you.  I hope her mother can come to realize that.”

“But?”

“But nothing.  It’s as clear as the sunrise that you two belong together.  I learned that lesson once, the hard way when I agreed that you shouldn’t see her.  It was like a light dimmed at our house.  I’m not about to let that happen again.”

“But?”

Jerry shook his head.  “But I also have to live under the same roof with both my wife and daughter who can’t even speak to each other right now.”

“I wish I could help.  If you have any suggestions, I’d be happy to hear them.”

Jerry looked me in the eye and then seemed to relax in his chair.  “You can keep loving Jeryl and try to be patient with the rest of us.”

“That I can do, sir.”

“Right now, I’m trying to keep things civil over there.  Janet told Jeryl she was grounded, as if that will make a difference.  Once I got them in separate rooms, I asked Janet if she really wanted to drive her daughter away.  That seemed to finally get through to her.  I think she has thought she could control the girls the way her mother controlled her, but she’s never acknowledged that Jeryl got her willpower from both of us, in spades.”

I chuckled.  “Jeryl is a lot more than strong-willed,” I said.  “She could give mules lessons in stubborn if she set her mind to it.”

Jerry actually smiled.  “She gets that from both Janet and I, so be careful.  Make sure she knows your boundaries.”

“I think she does.  I hope she does.”  We sat silently for a moment.  “Sir, if you don’t mind me asking, what makes Janet and her mother so opposed to me?”

Jerry sighed.  “I don’t know that it’s you specifically, but more what you represent.  Janet had an older sister.  Evidently, she got pregnant very young.  Her mother drove her off and then railed against Janet and then our daughters for the rest of her life.  The first time Janet introduced me to her, I thought she was going to shoot me.  Of course, I had already proposed at that point.  I think that’s the only reason Cynthia let me continue seeing Janet.”

“That’s sad.”

“It is.  Neither of them will discuss the matter in any rational way.  Janet’s sister and that baby are forbidden topics.”

“So, is there anything specific you’d like me to do?”

“I never imagined I would be discussing my youngest daughter’s sex life with her boyfriend, but I’d like to know that you two have been careful and protected.”

“We have.  Jeryl started on the pill over a year ago.  We both love each other deeply but aren’t ready to start a family yet.  In a few more years, we’ll see.”

“Have you talked about that far in the future?”

“Of course.  The weekend she got home from her grandmother’s two years ago I told her that all the money I’m making is for us, including her.  I want her by my side as long as she wants to be there.  She feels the same way.  I know it sounds cliché, but we complete each other.  I miss her smile and her laugh, and I appreciate her mind and wit.  I’m not interested in a physical plaything.  I fully intend on asking your permission to make her my wife in the future.  But we’re not ready to do that quite yet.”

“Why not?”

“I guess we both hear our parents telling us that high school romances seldom endure.”

Jerry shook his head.  “So, we caution you, you listen, and as a result you run the risk of losing each other.”

“We do listen, but I don’t think we are risking anything.”

“Well, I hope not.  In the meantime, I want you to know that when you do decide to ask me, I will give my blessing.  Janet may be another story, but you’ll have mine.”

“Thank you, sir.  And thank you for coming over today as well.”

Jerry stood to leave.  I followed him to the door.

“By the way, Paul, I’ll make sure Jeryl is at work on time Monday.  Grounding has never been a reason to miss work in our house.  I won’t let it start being one now.”

I held back my grin until he was pulling out of the driveway.  He had come a long way in thinking about me over the past few years.

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Navigating Plot Challenges: Writing into a Corner

I’ve been editing and polishing my latest story, as discussed last month. I know I’m making the story better and stronger, but it is not without its challenges. One issue I faced is the skipping of progress in certain character/conflict arcs. My method of tracing these arcs exposed a weakness in part of the story. I realized that I had essentially skipped over showing progress in that conflict.

As I work to resolve that issue, I’ve expanded the conflict. I’ve added several thousand words to the overall story. The obstacles facing the character are more difficult. They are also more compelling to the reader. But now I’ve written the character into a corner.

I want to be clear; I like what I’ve added. However, I don’t see a clear path to resolving this part of the story. Without sharing major spoilers, this part of the book deals more with a procedural crime novel than science fiction or fantasy. The character is uncovering leads and connections, but has now hit a wall that makes progress nearly insurmountable. Their progress supports the larger tale with interesting background connections. It raises the stakes for one of the main conflicts. But, I need to find a method of linking their current progress and dilemma back to the main tale. How can them resolving their part of the conflict tie into the larger story?

One method of resolving this that I’m exploring now, is to write a few sentences of possible scenes/options using a yes-and approach from the MICE model in my post on flash fiction. This forces me to write the action the characters take, and the reason/outcome that moves them closer to resolving the conflict.

I know I’ll get there, but this is obviously a problem being a gardener-style writer.

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WIP – Technomancer: Exploring Malachi’s Dark Bond

Continuing to share the opening scenes from my current work in progress, Technomancer.

Malachi felt something through the bond he had created with the priestess. Sensing her thoughts across realms was more difficult than he had foreseen. He sat down in the chair on the balcony overlooking the chaos sea. The churning energy from this realm filled him with power. He closed his eyes, sending his senses down the bond. He could sense her struggle – her determination to forge a new path in a world dominated by technology and those who wielded its power. With a wicked grin, Malachi reinforced the geas he had laid upon her. His will whispered into the depths of her subconscious the importance of finding a man of power and influence in the realm of technology. Finding his prey would ensure her survival and success. He would have the power of that distant realm. He would use that power to bring the others to heel. 

He embedded the return command deep within her mind, ensuring it would only be revealed when she has ensnared her target and was ready to bring him back to his new master. Her desire would have no power. Her victims will would be tied to the priestess. Her quest would be fulfilled, regardless of her own feelings or desires.

His will, Malachi Guardian of Set, was all that would matter for the priestess’s quest.

This excerpt is short, since it is a quick-cut at the end of chapter six. The scene sets up some tension in one of the main plot lines that is expanded in the next chapter. I hope you are enjoying this serial sharing of the story. Please like or comment if you want more.

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WIP – Unraveling Mysteries: Elara’s Journey in Technomancer

Continuing to share the opening scenes from my current work in progress, Technomancer.

Finn was surprised when Elara reappeared, clean and in a different though similar dress. She also had sandals on her feet. His breath caught at the sight of her. He felt nearly invisible in her presence. His normal clothes were functional, not fashionable. He was still in the gray and charcoal plaid shirt and dark pants with the many pockets he had worn for the past three days. He had taken off his regular shoes while making tea and donned comfortable slippers before sitting at his small table to look at his notes.

“Thank you,” Elara said as she joined him. She eyed the cup of tea he had prepared for her and then lifted to smell the aroma.

“It’s a herbal blend,” Finn said. “I didn’t think caffeine was needed. I don’t know about you, but I need some rest before tackling next steps and figuring out how to help you.” He took a sip from his mug and was pleased when Elara copied him.

“You don’t believe my story,” she said after enjoying the first sip of the floral and citrus tea. She could feel his wariness at her assertion. The goddess had not abandoned her completely. Her lunar intuition was still with her. He required proof.

She reached out with her mind and canceled her moon weave once more.

Finn blinked as her dress disappeared, and nearly dumped his hot tea in his lap. Even with damp hair and no makeup, she was stunningly beautiful. A moment later, she was clothed once more.

“I am to be a priestess of the Moon Goddess,” Elara said. “That is one of my gifts. I am not of your world, Finn.”

“I, I believe you,” he stuttered. “But why are you here? How did you get here?”

Elara nodded, then told what she recalled. She ignored her rape, not wanting Finn to look down on her or send her away. Such shaming and casting out would be expected back in Elysia. No woman should put herself in a position to be taken as Elara had been. At least that is what most of her folk believed.

Finn was nodding when she finished telling of her awakening in the alley and the suspicion she had of being under a compulsion. “A quantum tunnel could explain your transport from one dimension to another,” he said. “I don’t know about this geas you mention, but it’s possible some sort of entanglement was used to override your sense of connection and will.” He shook his head again. “If that is what has been done to you, it’s evil worse than I’m fighting.”

“What do you mean?”

“The men I was fleeing are protecting evil here. They use the technology I helped make to watch and influence everyone; to wield their power. Worse yet, they use it to hide their own evil actions. If they had the power to control free-will, like what was done to you, they would be unstoppable.”

Elara paled at his words. The magician could already control her. Did he want someone from this world to do the same on a much larger scale? If the powerful here that Finn mentioned could watch the masses, how much worse would it be in Elysia when she completed her quest?

“What will you do?” she finally asked.

Finn sighed. “I need to turn over my proof to someone who can announce it to the world. If enough people are aware, the people will demand change.”

Elara felt unease with his plan. “You have such powerful bards here that can talk to the whole world?” Elara asked.

“No, but we have a few journalists who retain some integrity. They have the connections to broadcast what is going on. At least, I hope they do.” Finn stifled a yawn. “I need to sleep on it. I think I know who I can trust, but it’s been a long few days for me.” He eyed his couch. “You can take the bedroom, and I’ll stretch out here,” he said.

“You only have one bed?” Elara asked, suddenly tired as well. She had been unconscious, used, and abused, not asleep and resting.

“Yes. The second room is my office. I never put a bed in there.” He chuckled to himself. “I’ve never had a guest here before, for that matter. This has always been my refuge from the world.”

Elara sensed the honor in him as he thought. He would only bring a stranger here whom he had sworn to aid and protect. Finn may not be a powerful man in this world, but he was a good man. For now, that would have to be enough for her. She prayed the geas would agree.

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