Jennifer Crusie's Blog, page 293

Slappable Penguins

Some days I just want to slap people: the phone answerers at my bank who don’t talk to each other and therefore give me conflicting information, the guy at Home Depot who always scowls and says, “What?” and then repeats the wrong information when I buy paint, the Republicans in Congress, that kind of people. Which is when I go to this gif:

Hope your day is filled with unslappable penguins.

Next Who Sunday: Blink, Steven Moffat

“Blink” is such a standout that it regularly makes the top of the Best Who lists, all the more remarkable because it pretty much sidelines the Doctor. Instead it’s Sally Sparrow against the Weeping Angels: “Don’t blink. Blink and you’re dead. They’re fast, faster than you can believe. Don’t turn your back, don’t look away, and don’t blink.” One of the things I love about this: Sally Sparrow. A great protagonist can carry a story; a great protagonist in a great story is even better.

Who Sunday: Human Nature/Family of Blood, Paul Cornell

If ever a story showcased the concept of the uncanny valley, it’s this two-parter. That chill that the not-quite-human-but-too-close-to-dismiss creates is used to great effect here. So let’s talk about how Cornel makes our flesh creep with the creepy flesh of the Family of Blood. And anything else you want to talk about, too, of course.

Cherry Saturday: 7-13-2013

July 13 is Embrace Your Geekness Day.

Or as the Cherries refer to it, every day.

The McD Romance Writing Program, 2013

The 2013 McDaniel College Nora Roberts Romance Writing Program begins on August 12, and registration is open now. We’ve made a lot of changes since our first year, and a big thank you to the 2012 McD students who helped me figure out a better way to teach this, to Pam Regis who is the perfect administrator (patience of a saint), and to Nora Roberts, whose generosity makes this program possible.

Here are some details about the program:

• The course is “wholly online, completely asynchronous,” which means you’ll never to have to leave the house, and there is no set time you have to be online, although you do have to check in regularly.

• There are five eight-week classes in the program with two-week breaks in between each course. We’ve also added three optional eight-week workshops for a second year because of student interest.

• The first four courses are designed to give students the tools they need to make their novels better. Please note, that’s “tools” not “rules” and “better” not “conforming to a standard of perfection.” Each course gives the student the theory behind the subject of the course, the writing tools that have developed from the theories, and practice in using those tools.

• The fifth course is on publishing. We drink a lot during that one.

• The three second-year workshops are designed to provide the student with a framework and support group for finishing her novel.

Each course is divided into four two-week modules.

The assignments for each first year module are

• an exercise or analysis to make the module concept clearer (Mod 1)

• a scene or synopsis or query letter (aka creative writing) (Mod 2)

• three critiques of fellow students’ work plus an exercise or analysis to make a concept clearer [Mod 3)

• the rewrite of the creative writing assignment from [Mod 2]; the publishing course adds a completed book proposal

The assignments for second year workshop modules are

• an overview of the novel (plot plan, character arc plan, novel plan (Mod 1)

• a student-designed project based on a problem in the student’s novel (Mod 2 & 3)

• one third of the student’s novel finished in draft form [Mod 4)

In addition to the formal assignments, students are required to

• Participate in the discussion forums (this has not been a problem for the 2012 students; the problem has been getting them out of the forums; turns out writers like to talk about writing)

• Write their goals for each module in online Learning Logs and then evaluate those goals at the end of the modules (along with any notes, insights, questions, etc., during the module; your online journal).

• Write ten pages/ 2500 words of new first draft on their novels each module (this is evaluated solely on quantity, not quality; the idea is to keep students writing new pages for their novels while they’re analyzing and rewriting their work in assignments).

• Read a lot throughout the first four classes: romance novels, writing textbooks (Robert McKee’s Story, Janet Burroway’s Writing Fiction, Renni Browne and Dave King’s Self-Editing for Fiction Writers), internet posts and essays, and the Lecture PDFs I put up each module. There are also some videos to watch and some screenplays to read which usually leads to watching the films (Moonstruck and “A Scandal in Belgravia” in particular).

Other things you should know:

• Everything students do in this program is part of a process; none of these assignments is supposed to be finished work. You can’t fix a page until you HAVE a page, and since writing is re-writing (and re-writing and re-writing), it’s important not to waste time and energy worrying about how perfect the assignment is and focus instead on how to make it better each time. Because writers tend to despair when they look at their drafts, and despair is only amplified if somebody’s actually grading the suckers, I repeated, “It’s a process, just make it better each time” as a reminder so many times that the students voted to put “It’s a process” on the McD 2012 t-shirt.

• I am always, always, always late with the grading, but if a student asks a question on the Discussion boards or on the class blog, she’ll get a (probably long and detailed) answer within twenty-four hours. After five courses, I’m convinced that the real learning in this program takes place in the Discussion Forums and the group blog, but I’m going to make the students do the assignments anyway.

• I will answer questions about the program in the comments, but I’ve also invited the current students to come over and answer questions, too, since they’ll have a better perspective on the experience. I’ve told them to be brutally honest in their answers, but if you’d prefer, Jill at jillwquestions@gmail.com, Michille at michillecaples@comcast.net, Kathy at kate.deane@hotmail.com, and Jeannine at jec003@connections.mcdaniel.edu will also answer questions privately in e-mail.

Admin stuff:

Tuition is $450 per credit hour; courses are three credit hours. Registration is open now until July 31. The class is limited to fifteen students, and when it’s filled, that’s it because I am not effective with class sizes larger than that. The next opportunity to begin the program will be August 2014. Click here to apply: http://www.mcdaniel.edu/graduate/admissions/

Melissa Harris Perry: Be Ignorant, Be Silent, Be Thick

I’m a big Melissa Harris Perry fan, even more so now that I’ve read her “Be ignorant, be silent, be thick” section of her commencement address at Wellesley on io9. I love this speech.

Title (Second) Week: Elizabeth Eldridge

Here’s Elizabeth Eldridge’s title request. For convenience sake, here’s a repeat of title advice from the last post:

Things to remember about titles:

• One word titles are generally not memorable; you need at least two words because the juice is in the relationship between the words, the spark that jumps between them. Temptation is a lousy title; Welcome to Temptation is one of the best of my books.

• Familiar titles, aka songs and movies, generally make your book sound run of the mill, not to mention hard to google. Maybe This Time, my book, comes up fourth on an google search after “Maybe This Time,” the song, you tube video, lyrics, and Wikipedia entry. Welcome to Temptation is the first google entry.

• If possible, the title should should like something one of your characters would say, or at least be in her or his voice. (Phin says, “Welcome to Temptation” when he meets Sophie. Nobody says, “Maybe this time” in the book.)

• If possible, the title should reflect the crackle of the conflict or the romantic juice of the story, anything that strikes a spark when you read it. This is even more important in the digital age when you often don’t have a cover, or at least a cover bigger than an inch, to draw the reader in.

• Avoid theme at all costs. Nobody ever picked up a novel and said, “I can’t wait to find out about the theme.”

• Keep it clean if you want it in a lot of stores.

And now, here’s Elizabeth.

Michael (Viscount Wallingford) spent the last eight years protecting king and country, but even with Napoleon safely tucked away on St. Helena, his life still isn’t his own. Falsely accused of treason when he returns to London, he’s in a race against time to uncover his accuser and the real traitor before he finds himself swinging at the end of a silken rope.

Tired of being left alone in Derbyshire, Abigail, who hasn’t seen Michael since they said “I do,” has come to London to convince her husband that it’s time to turn his attentions closer to home. When she learns of the threats against Michael, she finds ways to help him, despite his resistance. The situation is complicated by Michael’s secretive nature, a vengeful government official, and a web of events set in motion long before Michael was even born. In the end justice prevails and Michael learns that, when it comes to uncovering secrets of the heart, wives are invaluable.

Title (Second) Week: Kay Keppler

Here’s Kay Keppler’s title request. For convenience sake, here’s a repeat of title advice from the last post:

Things to remember about titles:

• One word titles are generally not memorable; you need at least two words because the juice is in the relationship between the words, the spark that jumps between them. Temptation is a lousy title; Welcome to Temptation is one of the best of my books.

• Familiar titles, aka songs and movies, generally make your book sound run of the mill, not to mention hard to google. Maybe This Time, my book, comes up fourth on an google search after “Maybe This Time,” the song, you tube video, lyrics, and Wikipedia entry. Welcome to Temptation is the first google entry.

• If possible, the title should should like something one of your characters would say, or at least be in her or his voice. (Phin says, “Welcome to Temptation” when he meets Sophie. Nobody says, “Maybe this time” in the book.)

• If possible, the title should reflect the crackle of the conflict or the romantic juice of the story, anything that strikes a spark when you read it. This is even more important in the digital age when you often don’t have a cover, or at least a cover bigger than an inch, to draw the reader in.

• Avoid theme at all costs. Nobody ever picked up a novel and said, “I can’t wait to find out about the theme.”

• Keep it clean if you want it in a lot of stores.

And now, here’s Kay.

Phoebe Renfrew needs to get her job back at the CIA, or she’ll owe the agency a ton of money for her college education. When she hears two Koreans talking about guns, she knows something’s wrong—and maybe, if she can figure out what they’re up to, she can get reinstated. Chase Bonaventure is a retired—not by choice—professional football player who’s building a new career in a startup electric car company. He’s got a good product, but he needs the Swedish investors to help him ramp up production. When the Swedes turn out to speak Korean, Chase needs Phoebe to seal the deal he needs for his firm. And Phoebe needs time to figure out what the terrorists are up to. With the help of the Las Vegas All-Elvis Revue, Phoebe saves the day, Chase signs his deal, and together, they demonstrate that what happens in Vegas really can stay in Vegas.

Title (Second) Week: Jeannine Covington

Here’s Jeannine Covington’s title request. For convenience sake, here’s a repeat of title advice from the last post:

Things to remember about titles:

• One word titles are generally not memorable; you need at least two words because the juice is in the relationship between the words, the spark that jumps between them. Temptation is a lousy title; Welcome to Temptation is one of the best of my books.

• Familiar titles, aka songs and movies, generally make your book sound run of the mill, not to mention hard to google. Maybe This Time, my book, comes up fourth on an google search after “Maybe This Time,” the song, you tube video, lyrics, and Wikipedia entry. Welcome to Temptation is the first google entry.

• If possible, the title should should like something one of your characters would say, or at least be in her or his voice. (Phin says, “Welcome to Temptation” when he meets Sophie. Nobody says, “Maybe this time” in the book.)

• If possible, the title should reflect the crackle of the conflict or the romantic juice of the story, anything that strikes a spark when you read it. This is even more important in the digital age when you often don’t have a cover, or at least a cover bigger than an inch, to draw the reader in.

• Avoid theme at all costs. Nobody ever picked up a novel and said, “I can’t wait to find out about the theme.”

• Keep it clean if you want it in a lot of stores.

And now, here’s Jeannine.

Lady Susannah wants only to reach her majority, inherit her fortune, and live as a happy spinster rather than a miserable wife. Her snake-like uncle has a different plan: marry her to his unscrupulous friend, then split her dowry.

To circumvent her uncle, the ever-independent Susannah goes on a husband-hunt, determined that if she must marry, it will be to someone she can control. When handsome and curious Nate Kinlan presents himself as a prospective suitor, Susannah sees red. Nate is dangerous to her mission of finding an uninspiring husband, and his stolen kisses are proof of that. But Nate has his own mission: prove Susannah’s uncle is a traitor, and he has no qualms about using her to do just that.

When Susannah’s uncle speeds up the marriage timeline, Nate proposes a marriage of convenience to protect her while still having access to her uncle. She refuses, knowing she cannot trust herself — or him — to keep it “convenient.” But when other suitors eager for her fortune attempt to kidnap Susannah, and Nate still hasn’t found the evidence he needs, he proposes again — this time, a fake marriage. With no other suitable options, she agrees.

Suspicious of their marriage, Susannah’s uncle aims to prove it or kill Nate, whichever comes first. The “newlyweds” must tamper their growing attraction and work together so each may get what they want — which might just be each other.

Next Who Sunday: Human Nature /Family of Blood, Paul Cornell

This two-parter is a stand-out in the Who canon and, surprise, not written by Stephen Moffat but by Paul Cornell, who also wrote “Father’s Day.” It’s both terrifying and emotionally wrenching, plus tightly plotted and beautifully acted. Also, seriously creepy antagonists and the Doctor gets married. Kind of.