Phoebe Farag Mikhail's Blog, page 2

Shortbread Theology

by Jessica Ryder-Khalil

Today’s guest post by frequent contributor Jessica Ryder-Khalil is the perfect read for everyone seeking peace during the flurry of preparations this holiday season.

My family’s shortbread dough is comprised of just three ingredients: flour, sugar, and butter.  I baked this recipe for many years before recognizing how these three ingredients could be a metaphor for the Trinity, the All-Holy three in one and one in three. When I learned how to “practice the presence of God” from Brother Lawrence, I could see dancing away in the mixing bowl an example of the mysterious nature of God in a sweet perichoresis, sharing the same essence in their necessity to the whole. Of course, these spontaneous moments are not exhaustive theological treatises about the Persons of the Trinity. They are simply gifts of time shared with God available to everyone willing to seek Him in the ordinary.  

The recipe is one handed down from my Scottish great-grandma and has been treasured by generations. Shortbread was the flavor of Christmas, and every trip to grandma’s house was an opportunity to sneak to the cookie jar for a taste. But as I grew in my Orthodox faith I found, to my surprise, that the process of making the cookies became sweeter than tasting the final product. All of a sudden, these simple ingredients and common kitchen tools were leading me to Bethlehem to gaze upon St. Mary and our blessed Savior. As the dough was churning away, I fondly recalled the stories my grandmother would tell me of her aunties and their advice: the longer you work the dough, the richer the shortbread will be.   Perhaps my great-great-aunties advice would ring true for this culinary meditation too–the longer we abide in His presence, the richer our experience will be.       

Reflecting on that special batch, I remember Brother Lawrence of the Resurrection and his wise counsel to think about and talk to God during all our daily tasks. He called this ongoing inner activity the “practice of the presence of God.” Brother Lawrence attempted a life of monastic seclusion, but found he needed to submit himself to a spiritual rule and joined the Discalced Carmelites of Paris in the mid-1600s. He didn’t care for the manual labor involved in community monastic life, especially kitchen duty. However, by talking with God throughout the day his work became a source of joy. Conversations and letters of this monk are recorded in the book by the same name, The Practice of the Presence of God.  In it, Brother Lawrence advises, “we should establish ourselves in the presence of God, talking always with Him.” 

Juggling cookie trays and judging baking times can get tricky, especially with kids underfoot and other chores waiting, making it abundantly clear why Brother Lawrence felt exasperated by the sink full of dirty dishes. The behind-the-scenes work can feel mundane and even useless. Or worse, our anxiety and rushing can rob us of our joy. In short, our Christmas efforts might be nothing but folly. Brother Lawrence comments, “It was sad to see so many people mistake the means for the end, who for reasons of human respect attach great importance to works they do very imperfectly” (pg. 48). The work of the Nativity season–the baking, decorating and giving–can only be sanctified if we remain in His presence while doing it. Sanctifying our time begins with patiently waiting for the Lord while purposefully working. By serving St. Elizabeth and preparing a home for the Son of God, this is what St. Mary and St. Joseph did.   

The next step in making shortbread is to roll out the dough. When you take out the lump from the bowl, there are bumps and cracks and pieces that fall off altogether. One of my favorite personal Advent traditions is listening to the Christmas section of Handel’s Messiah, which starts with the prophecies from the Book of Isaiah: “Every valley shall be exalted, and every mountain and hill shall be made low: and the crooked shall be made straight, and the rough places plain” (Isaiah 40:4). Rolling out the dough, I try to get as flat and smooth a surface as possible before getting out my cookie cutter. Indeed, the rough places will be made plain through the Incarnation of the Lord Jesus Christ. The broken will be mended, reconciled, and made ready to be shaped in the likeness of the Divine Image.        

Another family Nativity tradition involves getting out the family copy of On the Incarnation by St. Athanasius. This important theological work informs the next step of the shortbread production, cutting the cookies. The great Alexandrian patriarch instructs us that God in His goodness would not have made humans with a rational mind if he did not wish them to know Him. He writes, “So, lest this should happen [humans not know God], being good he bestowed on them his own image, our Lord Jesus Christ and made them according to his own image and according to his likeness, so that…knowing the Creator they might live the happy and truly blessed life” (pg. 60-61). He took our shape, so that we might be conformed to His. Thus, the cookies are cut into stars, circles, diamonds, as we are also sculpted into something precious to God.      

Next, the shortbread goes into the oven and the prophet Malachi guides us through the baking time. “For He is like a refiner’s fire…and He shall purify the sons of Levi…that they may offer unto the Lord an offering in righteousness” (Malachi 3:2-3).  Unlike many cookies that brown while baking, shortbread is perfect when it is firm, but the color is still white. This brings to mind King David and his song of repentance, “Wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow”  (Psalm 50:7). When the shortbread has cooled, it is time to package the cookies up and give them away. The sweet, slightly crunchy treat is too good to keep to ourselves. We are invited to “taste and see that the Lord is good,” in our inner life of anticipating the restoring, saving Incarnation (Psalm 34:8).  

I remember Christmas growing up as a month of constant indulgence and decadence: toys, candy, cookies, and more. As an Orthodox Christian now, I am very grateful that the month preceding the Nativity Feast is one of waiting and watching. It struck me one day that perhaps many of my fellow Christians also feel something is amiss with the season. Then, over the radio piped the voice of Amy Grant and her song “I Need a Silent Night.” In it she muses, “I need a silent night, a holy night to hear an angel voice through the chaos and the noise. I need a midnight clear, a little peace right here to end this crazy day with a silent night.”  Dear Amy, it isn’t just a silent night that is needed, but as Brother Lawrence put it, we need the practice of the presence of God. We need to seek Him in the ordinary; we need to watch for Him while we work, as those shepherds in their fields did many years ago.      

In a letter to a “Woman in the World,” Brother Lawrence advises, “God does not ask much of us…the least little remembrance will always be pleasing to Him. There is no need to cry very loudly, for He is nearer to us than we think…We may make a chapel of our heart whereto we may escape from time to time to talk with Him quietly, humbly and lovingly” (pg. 68). It is a comfort that giving to Him from what He has already given to us is enough, if we only look and listen, watch and wait.   

Jessica Ryder-Khalil is a frequent contributor to Being in Community. She is a wife and mom of four children between the ages of 16 and 7 years of age.  She is a servant at St. Mary Magdalene Church in Gainesville, FL and is working towards an MTS degree from St. Athanasius & St. Cyril Theological School.  Jessica was baptized into the Coptic Orthodox Church 17 years ago and is a continual learner along the path to Orthodoxy. Before family life took the lead role, Jessica taught English as a Second Language both abroad and in the USA. Her previous posts include Death, Roses, and Resurrection, An Hour in a Few Minutes, Spiritual Warfare Everywhere, and What My Mom Taught Me About Authenticity. Text and photos (c) Jessica Ryder-Khalil, 2023.

Books mentioned in this post:

The Practice of the Presence of God by Brother Lawrence.

Purchase from: Paraclete Press | Bookshop | Amazon

On the Incarnation by St. Athanasius

Purchase from: SVS Press | Bookshop | Amazon

Audiobook available on Audible.

(Featured on my Orthodox Christian Advent Reading List).

Some of the links above are affiliate links to Bookshop and Amazon to purchase the books suggested here. Using these links gives me a small commission, and this helps support my blog expenses. Purchasing books on Bookshop also helps local independent bookstores. Some of these books can be found at an even lower price used. If you use my Thriftbooks referral link, you and I will get a promotional code for a free book if you spend $30 or more.

The post Shortbread Theology appeared first on Being In Community.

Holiday Book Gift List 2023

by Phoebe Farag Mikhail

This has been a great season for new books, and I’m so excited to highlight a few for bookshelves and gift-giving this year. The first six are children’s books, and the last two are adult books. May you enjoy a blessed holy season and a happy new year!

Philo, Shifo, and the Love SuperHoly by Mireille Mishriky and illustrated by S. Violette Palumbo is the seventh volume in the “Philo and the SuperHolies” series about the fruit of the Spirit, reimagined as superheroes. This one may be my favorite one yet, because it’s the first one written from Philo’s perspective. He shares the experiences every child goes through when confronted with an annoying younger cousin or sibling, someone who does everything wrong but somehow gets all the attention and is easily forgiven. I read this as a Kindle version and immediately purchased the print copy so I could share this with my children, who loved it. You can also add a “Peace SuperHoly” pillow to a child’s gift from We the Copts.

Purchase from: Mireille Mishriky | Amazon

My Saintly Family: A Book on Christian Family Life for Toddlers and Young Children by Creative Orthodox reimagines Sts. Emmeline, Macrina, Basil, Gregory and Peter’s ancient Christian holy family for modern times. Basil loves nature, Gregory writes books, Macrina teaches, and together with their parents they make their family a church and the church their family. At the end of the story, the author provides profiles of each saint’s life so we can get to know them more. The full color illustrations are in Creative Orthodox’s signature style.

Purchase from: Creative Orthodox | Amazon

Come, Stay, Fetch written by Summer Kinard and illustrated by Kathryn Tussing is a brightly colored board book that, in 12 words, managed to make me cry. In 12 words it tells the story of Christ in the terms one would use for a dog. “Come,” it starts, and a dog laps onto the shore as the Lord Jesus also calls His disciples to come and follow Him. “Stand” Jesus commands, and the daughter of Jairus stands up from her bed, alive. The illustrations say what the words don’t say, and each page includes references to the Gospel story. In addition to Christmas, this makes a wonderful baby shower gift or even a gift to any dog-loving family you know.

Purchase from:  Park End Books | Draw Near Designs | Kathryn Tussing on Etsy

Brave, Faithful and True: Children of the Bible by Katherine Bolger Hyde includes twelve stories of children from the Bible—six from the Old Testament, six from the New. The stories are told through the eyes of the children themselves. It’s a beautiful and giftable volume, serving well as an at-home read aloud and also a Sunday School resource. It connects each story to the Eastern Orthodox liturgical cycle, so readers in the Oriental Orthodox church will need to do a little research to find out how these stories connect to their specific feast days. Each story also includes an explanation of its significance for us. For example, after telling the story Jesus being found in the temple when he was young, the author explains why the Gospel writer, out of all the stories of Jesus’ childhood, chose this one to tell.  There are illustrations for each story by Gabriel Chaplin, drawn in the Byzantine iconographic tradition.

Purchase from: Ancient Faith Publishing | Amazon

All Creation Waits: The Advent Mystery of New Beginnings Children’s Edition by Gayle Boss is a beautiful adaptation for young children of her bestselling Advent book, which I reviewed here. This children’s edition has fewer words, and each day is color illustrated by Sharon Spitz. The pages describe how each animal lies in wait during the dark months of winter, as a metaphor for how all of creation waited for the coming of the Lord Jesus Christ. At the end of each page is the hopeful refrain, “The dark is not the end. It’s a door. It’s the way a new beginning comes.” It’s meant to be read slowly, one each day for 25 days, and there are more details about each animal with discussion questions at the end of the book. My only complaint as an Orthodox Christian who never speaks of Christ’s humanity without also speaking of His divinity is the last line, “they saw what creation is waiting for—a human at home with all creatures as kin.” Considering the verse that inspires the title, Romans 8:19, I would change it to “the Son of God, at home with all creatures as kin” when reading it aloud, or just have a discussion about how this “human at home with all creatures” is the Son of God himself who created them. This book makes a lovely gift for any animal loving children in your life. I received a review copy from Paraclete Press for an honest review of this title.

Purchase from: Paraclete Press | Bookshop | Amazon

Holy Night and Little Star: A Story for Christmas by Mitali Perkins is a gorgeous Nativity book to give as a gift. Along the same vein as her Holy Week book Bare Tree and Little Wind which I reviewed here, Perkins imagines the Nativity story through the eyes of a little star tasked with a big job. The lush illustrations by Khoa Le themselves twinkly brightly like stars, and the gold foil details on the cover make this a truly giftable addition to any child’s bookshelf. My favorite moment in the story is when Little Star, sent by Maker to Bethlehem, looks into the eyes of the baby boy in the manger, and recognizes them as the eyes of Maker, too. The publisher has also created some free Advent resources to go along with this book that can be found here.

Purchase from: Bookshop | Amazon

For the fiction lover in your life, The Covenant of Water by Abraham Verghese is a doorstopper of a book and worth every page. It is a historical fiction family saga that is ultimately about love. I cried several times throughout the book and cried again when I finished it, so be sure to tell your giftee to brace themselves. The story is mainly set in Kerala with a family of Indian Christians (likely Orthodox, but Varghese doesn’t specify as St. Thomas Christians in Kerala belong to Orthodox, Catholic, and Protestant communions) with what seems a strange and mysterious condition—every generation, someone in the family dies drowning. The mystery is unraveled by the end of the story, and although she doesn’t solve it herself, Big Amichi is my hero. I had a book hangover when I finished this one.

Purchase from: Bookshop | Amazon

Africa & Byzantium, edited by Andrea Myers Achi, is an excellent gift book for any adult in your life, especially the ones who are difficult to buy gifts for. This important book was written alongside the groundbreaking Africa & Byzantium exhibition at the Metropolitan Museum of Art, which I wrote about in great detail here. The book contains important articles about each of the exhibition objects, including an article by Mary Farag, who has a guest post on this blog here. The objects include icons, sacred objects, and cultural artefacts from Egypt, Tunisia, Nubia, and Ethiopia during the Byzantine historical period.

Purchase from: The Metropolitan Museum of Art | Bookshop | Amazon

Some of the links above are affiliate links to Bookshop and Amazon to purchase the books suggested here. Using these links gives me a small commission, and this helps support my blog expenses. Purchasing books on Bookshop also helps local independent bookstores. Some of these books can be found at an even lower price used. If you use my Thriftbooks referral link, you and I will get a promotional code for a free book if you spend $30 or more.

The post Holiday Book Gift List 2023 appeared first on Being In Community.

Africa and Byzantium at the Metropolitan Museum of Art

By Phoebe Farag Mikhail

At the ancient city of Abu Mena (c) Phoebe Farag Mikhail, 2023.

A few months ago, on a visit to Egypt, I had the opportunity to visit the ancient archeological heritage site, Abu Mena, just outside the modern Monastery of St. Mina near Alexandria. Believers from all over the ancient world traveled to Abu Mena to receive healing from the springs of water that flowed there and to venerate the relics of St. Mena the Wonderworker. They attributed to him the many miracles that happened at those springs, and believed the holy martyr’s relics gave the waters their healing power. According to our tour guide at Abu Mena, in the early centuries it rivaled Jerusalem as a major Christian pilgrimage center. From there, pilgrims would take home (or continue on to Sinai or Jerusalem with) clay flasks imprinted with the icon of St. Mena and filled with water or oil.

Some of those flasks, dating back to 610 A.D., have made their own pilgrimage from the ancient city of Abu Mena to the modern city of New York, where you can now see them on display at the new Africa and Byzantium exhibition on at the Metropolitan Museum of Art. You can hear me talk more about them on audio guide #543 on the exhibit website.

On Monday I had the honor of previewing the exhibition, officially opening to the public on November 19th, 2024 and staying in New York until March 2, 2024, when it will then go to the Cleveland Museum of Art in Ohio.  

I confess that the exhibition brought me to tears. One of the artefacts hails from one of my favorite monasteries, Deir El Suryan, an ancient and still operating monastery I have visited often but where I would never have seen this manuscript, because it is otherwise kept at the Vatican Library and on loan to the Met for this exhibition. This 12th– to 14th century “Polyglot Psalter” opens to a beautiful page of Iota art (a cross design patterned on the letter “iota”) on the left, and then a Psalm in five languages: Ethiopic, Syriac, Coptic, Arabic and Armenian. It hails from a time when Deir el Suryan was a multilingual monastery with monks from all over the world inhabiting it at different times. With a psalter like this, they might have prayed together in different tongues.

The manuscript gives me the sense that Christians in previous centuries interacted and engaged with each other across languages and borders more often, and with more depth, than I think we do now. And to me, it connects so many of the other objects in the exhibit that hail from these various places. I shed tears at the opportunity to see this beautiful book right here at the Met, a place very different from Deir El Suryan, and yet so similar in the meaningful way it also gathers people from so many different cultures and backgrounds to share a common–dare I say, spiritual? experience.

My family and I had some hope during that same trip to Egypt that we might also visit Sudan, but sadly, a civil war broke out at the exact same time. This war also meant that some important objects from the National Museum of Sudan that were going to be loaned to this exhibition did not make it there. Still, the Nubian Christian Faras wall paintings, on loan from the Faras Gallery at the National Museum in Warsaw, Poland, took my breath way. Photographs don’t do these works justice—they must be seen in person. This is a photograph of a beautiful wall painting of the Holy Theotokos holding Christ. In real life, you can see the depth in their eyes and imagine the vivid color they once were.

The exhibit includes sacred items and images from many religious communities of Africa during and soon after the Byzantine period, and also many cultural ones. I loved this second century, larger than life portrait of a woman in Fayoum—can you see a resemblance?

I can’t guarantee that the new Africa and Byzantium exhibition at the Metropolitan Museum of Art will bring you to tears as it did me, but I can guarantee that you will experience an awe-inspiring collection of art and artefacts never before gathered into one exhibition like this one. If you don’t live in or near New York City, this exhibition is worth traveling to see – considering how far some of these objects have traveled through time and space just to get here.

The exhibition book, Africa and Byzantium, is also available for even more in-depth descriptions of the objects in the exhibit. Purchase it at the Met Museum Shop | Yale University Press | Bookshop | Amazon.

The post Africa and Byzantium at the Metropolitan Museum of Art appeared first on Being In Community.

Death, Roses, and Resurrection

by Jessica Ryder-Khalil

Today’s guest post is from a Being in Community frequent contributor, Jessica Ryder-Khalil. As skeletons, ghosts and other reminders of death adorn houses all around us in Western cultures as we head towards Halloween, Jessica’s words help us reckon with the harsh reality of death and the mystery of life.

Renewed attention has recently been given to the study of loneliness and isolation, especially in the wake of the pandemic response.  The Surgeon General released a report earlier in 2023 on the importance of social connectivity for our overall health and well-being. It certainly looks like we have an intuitive idea of what happens to our bodies when we experience loss and separation because we say, “I feel like my heart is breaking.” Indeed, that is precisely the case. The HHS study reported that “social isolation and loneliness were associated with a 29% increase in heart disease and 32% increase in risk of stroke” (pg. 26). This psychosomatic connection shouldn’t really surprise us; our hearts take the brunt of our grief. In fact, this tightly knit design of interconnectedness should signal to us that we are in fact wonderfully and fearfully made to thrive in an environment of loving relationships and communal support.  

The nearness of God to humanity is a bulwark of Orthodox Christian faith. We read in the Gospels, “But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Do not fear; therefore, you are of more value than many sparrows” (Luke 12:7). It is always fun when we challenge our little Sunday School children to try to count their strands of hair.  I had one precocious child ask if God knows about the hair on the rest of our bodies, too!  God is intimately concerned with the details of our lives and if he knows when hair falls from our heads, how much more does He know when our heart is aching from loss and loneliness.  The wonder of the Incarnation is even greater still!  The Lord Jesus Christ experienced this very same inward groaning and heartbreak.  He not only knows, but He felt it too. The nearness of God teaches us that we should be near to each other in our joy and in our sorrow.       

Fr. Alexander Schmemann’s book For the Life of the World explores the closeness of our philanthropic God, the Lover of Mankind, through the sacraments and mysteries, in opposition to the secularization of western culture and religion. In it, Fr. Schmemann points out that Christianity does not deny the weight of suffering, disease, and death. Pain will break us whether we live as atomistic individuals or whether we choose community.  However, like Christ who wept for Lazarus while also proclaiming to Martha the immanent reality of the Resurrection, so to we have victory by suffering and grieving with patience and hope. Fr. Schmemann writes, “It is when Life weeps at the grave of the friend, when it contemplates the horror of death, that the victory over death begins” (pg 121). Our victory begins when we walk through grief together with dignity, honoring the victorious One, and solemnity, holding up those who mourn.           

The discussion of the secularization of death and disease in the West in Fr. Schmemann’s book packs a punch, especially when I reflect on the funerals of my non-Orthodox family versus the outpouring of communal, public mourning in the Orthodox setting. The experience of a western funeral and an Orthodox one could not be more different.  He is entirely correct that funeral homes are sterile environments which do everything they can to whitewash the horrific reality of loss. Nothing brings this to light more than funeral directors dubbing the ceremony a “celebration of life.”  While it is certainly healing and soothing to remember the good times we’ve had with our loved ones, we erase the gravity of human suffering and struggle if we reduce our lives to a highlight reel with no recognition of the miraculous continuation of life after death. There is no way to laugh or reminisce your way through the shadow of death.  As Fr. Schmemann succinctly puts it, “The Church considers healing a sacrament… A sacrament- as we already know- is always a passage, a transformation. Yet it is not a passage into supernature, but into the Kingdom of God, the world to come, into the very reality of this world and its life as redeemed and restored by Christ” (pg 123).

Jessica’s grandparents before their departures. (Photograph courtesy of Jessica Ryder-Khalil).

My grandparents were very dear to me and their loss in 2013 and 2017 was simultaneously expected and shocking. We gathered as a family each time, but I needed more than that sanitized western funeral.  I needed a reminder of the healing and transformation in Christ. Not long after my beloved grandfather’s death, I went for a walk and saw a rose bush in full bloom behind a chain link fence. The plant was large and healthy. One branch was poking through the fence with a beautiful rose on it. It stuck with me as both a source of comfort and as a good example of the Orthodox understanding of the mysterious proximity of the heavenly and the earthly. This moment demonstrated to me first that there is life on both sides of the fence, although on the other side there is a fullness that we cannot yet reach. Second, that we cannot pass through the fence; it is a definite barrier. Third, that even so the fence is porous, and the saints can reach out to us, and we can communicate with them. 

Like the rose poking through the fence, the saints are our great cloud of witnesses and supporters. For believers, we know that we are never alone, even when there is no one else around.   Within the church there is this unusual meeting of the heavenly and earthly, bound together in the love of God through the Son by the gift of the Spirit. This unity of the faithful is hard to explain to people who are outside the communion of saints, but it is the reason why the Orthodox hold dear the relics of the saints. First, we take the resurrection of the body as a foundational belief in a way that Western Christianity is not entirely comfortable with. These dry bones will rise as the prophet Ezekiel proclaimed.   Second, we all hold on to the material things of loved ones who have passed, whether it is photos or other belongings. It is strange to think that we can love someone who lived hundreds of years ago, yet it is so.  Sometimes those are the deepest, most abiding friendships. This meeting across time is exactly how we learn to love the Lord, someone who lived incarnate on earth 2,000 years ago but still reaches out to us now in His eternal glory.   

In Psalm 116:15 King David prayed, “Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of His saints.”  Some might take this out of context and derive from this verse a vision of a bloodthirsty, vengeful god. Or another take on this verse is how it is often used in funerals today- to describe how the Lord is happy to receive another saint in heaven. However, on deeper examination we can see that David is thanking the Lord for delivering him from death. This psalm isn’t for the one who has fallen asleep, but for the one who is still on earth working towards perfected peace, offering a sacrifice of praise, returning to the church to drink from the cup of salvation.  It is inevitable that suffering will break our hearts, but the medicine of immortality is on the altar and beckoning us to “return to our rest” and walk before the Lord in the land of the living in the presence of His people. We are not alone in our heartache but can take comfort in each other, whether they be saints on earth or saints in heaven.    

                

Jessica Ryder-Khalil is a frequent contributor to Being in Community. She is a wife and mom of four children between the ages of 16 and 7 years if age.  She is a servant at St. Mary Magdalene Church in Gainesville, FL and is working towards an MTS degree from St. Athanasius & St. Cyril Theological School.   Jessica was baptized into the Coptic Orthodox Church 17 years ago and is a continual learner along the path to Orthodoxy. Before family life took the lead role, Jessica taught English as a Second Language both abroad and in the USA. Her previous posts include An Hour in a Few Minutes, Spiritual Warfare Everywhere, and What My Mom Taught Me About Authenticity.

This post contains affiliate links to Amazon.com. You are under no obligation to use these links if you make a purchase, but using these links gives me a small commission, and this helps support the expenses of running the Being in Community website.

The post Death, Roses, and Resurrection appeared first on Being In Community.

Having it all together is not a fruit of the Spirit

by Phoebe Farag Mikhail

A bag full of hand me downs for my youngest son has been in my car for a month now. A more Well Put Together mom would have brought it in the same day, folded what could be worn into drawers and properly stored what is still too large. Not me. Instead, I thanked my dear friend for the clothes and left them in my minivan, where they weren���t hurting anyone.

A few weeks after receiving the clothes, I had to drag my youngest child out of bed for an early morning liturgy at church. Well Put Together mom would have laid his clothes out after bathing him in the evening, but that night my son had fallen asleep in yesterday���s clothes. We were already running late, so thankfully I didn���t have to change him–we just got into the car and left.

At church said son left his spot in the front pew and walked over to me, and it was then and only then that I noticed the HUGE hole in his pants. Everyone else in the church, if they weren���t closing their eyes in prayer, would have seen it too. This wasn���t just a little rip at the knee, but a huge, gaping hole, as if he had taken a scissor to it and cut off a piece of his pants so that his knee and lower thigh were visible.

Well Put Together Mom would have a complete change of clothes already prepared for such a time as this. I did not. But then, I remembered���the bag of hand me downs I never put away!

I rushed off to the car and thanked heaven when I found another pair of pants in that bag. They fit him perfectly. Into the trash went the other ripped pants. And into the trash went my guilt at not having it all together, because it���s in these crazy moments that I experience grace.

I wish I could be more put together, more prepared, less cluttered, less messy. Yet somehow, I feel my gratitude is greater when things turn out well despite my whirlwind life, not because of some well-oiled system I have created.

Don���t get me wrong. I need to declutter my house, and those clothes will have to leave the minivan trunk eventually. And I have much love and respect for people who do manage to keep things together more seamlessly for their families; plan their meals, keep a complete change of clothes in the car for every child at all times��� these are the people I could always count on when I forgot the baby wipes at home.

But these are also the people I often envied, wishing I could be more like them, and worried that they might resent me. It���s not their fault I envy them, and chances are they aren���t resenting me that extra baby wipe.

In her book One Beautiful Dream: The Rollicking Tale of Family Chaos, Personal Passions, and Saying Yes to Them Both, Jennifer Fulwiler tells the story of a woman she admired who was just like the Well Put Together Mom I envied: a wonderful homemaker who ran the church meal train, showed up to liturgy with impeccably dressed and well-behaved children, and kept a beautiful and uncluttered home.

But in conversation with that mom, Fulwiler learned that she had been an interior decorator before having children. That mom reminded Jen that keeping it together was her ���blue flame.��� That is what she enjoyed doing, what gave her life. She wasn���t on a morally superior plane, and neither did she judge her friend who didn���t seem so ���put together.��� Here is how the conversation went:

���People see that I like to keep my home super clean and I love getting the kiddos all dressed up. They hold me up like I���m doing all of this only out of some really strong sense of duty. But let me tell you, that is my thing that I love to do ��� Before I had kids I was an interior decorator. Style, beauty, all that stuff���it���s my blue flame. I���m using my gifts just like you are.��� ���I let her words sink in. Christy was using her blue flame too; it just looked different because her gifts had a natural outlet in household work.

-Fulwiler, Jennifer. One Beautiful Dream (p. 163). Zondervan. Kindle Edition.

“Crayons” by Jenn Durfey is licensed under CC BY 2.0. To view a copy of this license, visit https://creativecommons.org/licenses/....

Different things give me life. My ���blue flame��� in Fulwiler���s words is definitely not in the homemaking and interior decoration realm. It���s in the reading, writing, traveling, and educating realm. ���Keeping it together��� is not a fruit of the Spirit. I might not be the mom with extra baby wipes on hand, but I am the mom with the extra crayons in her bag from the restaurant she went to three months ago because she hasn���t cleaned her purse out since. (Ok, I���m also the mom with extra allergy medicine, but that���s another story.) We complete each other.

���Keeping it together��� is not a fruit of the Spirit. But love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness and self-control are, and those can be borne from the many gifts the Spirit gives us. The Well Put Together Mom I envy actually doesn���t really exist ��� she���s a composite of the person doing well all the things I fail at doing well. She exists somewhere on social media, sharing beautiful photos of clutter free-home or selling her meal planning system.

It doesn���t hurt to watch those decluttering videos or try a meal plan out. I tried meal planning; I even got a journal and a whiteboard on my fridge. It went well for a week or two until the meal plan on the board got erased on Tuesday and replaced with a nicely drawn picture by one of my children (the one who didn���t know how to read yet). Maybe I���ll try it again with less erasable system, but I���ve stopped feeling guilty about it. My family is eating.

What���s more important is that in all this I���m working on my inner life ��� learning to admire without envy, giving myself grace the way God gives me, and cultivating kindness towards all those people out there who think they are less ���Well Put Together��� than I am. What���s more important is me deciding what���s important, and not allowing the internet, magazines, and my own insecurities to dictate what���s important for me.

For more inspiring (tongue-in-cheek) homemaking and housekeeping tips, check out my post, Domestic goddess ��� Being In Community.

Summer Kinard wrote a beautiful blog post a few years ago in response to the ���Christian influencer��� trend of focusing on our outer appearance: Girl, Wash Your Soul – Summer Kinard

I shared some thoughts on letting my kids eat those sugary fruit pops over the summer here: Why It’s Okay for Kids to Eat Sugar (tinybeans.com)

Get updates on my latest blog posts, writing news, free subscriber resources, and other resources by subscribing to my email newsletter: Subscribe and receive two free ebooks and more! ��� Being In Community.

Some of the links above are Amazon affiliate links to purchase the books suggested here. Using these links gives me a small commission, and this helps support my blog expenses. Some books can be found at an even lower price used.  If you use my Thriftbooks referral link, you and I will get a promotional code for a free book if you spend $30 or more.

What I���m Reading this Lent (2023 Edition)

By Phoebe Farag Mikhail

This is my seventh year since staring Being in Community that I have shared my Great Lent reading list, and it has become one of my most popular posts. This year’s list includes some older books revived for a new audience, and a little more fiction than previous years. It seems my soul needs to be nourished by some holy imagination this Great Lent.

If you���re looking for Lent children���s book recommendations, check out my Great Lent Picture Book Guide, which contains multiple picture book suggestions for children, arranged according to each week of the Coptic Orthodox Church Great Lent lectionary.

Gregory of Nyssa: Sermons on the Beatitudes

I���ve hard several clergy recommend studying the Sermon on the Mount during the Great Lent, and I���ve been reading a lot by St. Gregory of Nyssa lately, so this his Sermons on the Beatitudes tops my list for Lenten reading this year.

Purchase Gregory of Nyssa: Sermons on the Beatitudes on Amazon.

Calmness by Pope Shenouda III

This wonderful book by His Holiness Pope Shenouda III of blessed memory, originally delivered as four sermons in Egypt and later translated to English, has been revised and re-published by Life Giving Springs Press in a beautiful hand-bound edition. The first English edition is available for download as a PDF here. ��Purchases of the revised edition support St. Gregory American Coptic Orthodox Church in Anaheim, California to help build the parish community and activities for the youth and at-risk populations in the area.��

Purchase Calmness by Pope Shenouda III on Life Giving Springs | Amazon.

Mother Maria Skobtsova: Essential Writings

Also known as Mother Maria of Paris, this book contains Mother Maria Skobstova���s essential writings, as well as an extensive biography of her in the introduction by Jim Forest. Last year���s Lent Reading List included a wonderful picture book about this modern martyr, who lost her life in the Ravensbr��ck concentration camp in Germany for hiding Jews in her Paris convent.

Purchase Mother Maria Skobtsova: Essential Writings on Bookshop | Amazon.

Guirguis the Torchbearer by Iris Habib El-Masry

Topping my list of fiction books is this republished work of historical fiction by the late Iris Habib El-Masry, a Coptic Orthodox theologian and historian who is most well known for her two volume history, The Story of the Copts. The novel takes place in eighth century Egypt after the Arab conquest.

Purchase Guirguis the Torchbearer by Iris Habib El-Masry from St. Mary & St. Moses Abbey Press | Amazon.

Brisbane by Eugene Vodolazkin, translated by Marian Schwartz.

Laurus, the international bestseller by Russian author Eugene Vodolazkin has been on my to be read pile for a while, so when this English translation of his new book released in 2022, I resolved to read both this Lent. Brisbane takes place between Russia and Ukraine, in the memories of a musician suffering from Parkinson���s disease through his biographer.

Purchase Brisbane by Eugen Vodolazkin from Plough | Bookshop | Amazon.

The Lost Saint by Christine Rogers

I enjoyed Spyridon���s Shoes by Christine Rogers, so I happily picked up this historical fiction chapter book set in sixteenth century Greece during the Ottoman invasion of Rhodes. It tells the story of a boy separated from his family during battle, and features the little known St Phanourios, the saint that many Eastern Orthodox Christians call upon for looking for lost things.

Purchase The Lost Saint by Christine Rogers from Ancient Faith Publishing | Amazon.

Lent: The Season of Repentance and Renewal by Esau McCaulley

Anglican priest and theologian Esau McCaulley���s book, Reading While Black: African American Biblical Interpretation as an Exercise in Hope is on my TBR, so I quickly snapped up this new little book about Lent as well to read this season. I am always interested in reading how traditions different from mine approach the Great Lent. It helps me see my own tradition with fresh eyes.

Purchase Lent: The Season of Repentance and Renewal by Esau McCaulley from InterVarsity Press | Bookshop | Amazon.

Reclaiming Rest: The Promise of Sabbath, Solitude, and Stillness in a Restless World by Kate H. Rademacher

In many ways, the Great Lent can be seen as a time of solitude and stillness, and this book by Christian author and public health professional Kate Rademacher tells us how to do this practically in a world that actively works to prevent us from rest, reflection and stillness.

Purchase Reclaiming Rest: The Promise of Sabbath, Solitude, and Stillness in a Restless World by Kate H. Rademacher from Broadleaf | Bookshop | Amazon.

Pillars: How Muslim Friends Led Me Closer to Jesus by Rachel Pieh Jones

I highlighted Rachel Pie Jones��� excellent biography of Annalena Tonelli, Stronger than Death, in a previous Lent Book list. Pillars tells more of Rachel���s own story working in the Horn of Africa among Muslims, and how her relationships with them led her closer to Christ. Through them she discovers Christian tradition is deeper and wider than she once believed.

Purchase Pillars: How Muslim Friends Led Me Closer to Jesus by Rachel Pieh Jones from Plough | Bookshop | Amazon.

A Place to Belong: Celebrating Diversity and Kinship in the Home and Beyond by Amber O’Neal Johnston

Many of my readers might not know that I started homeschooling in the Fall of 2020 and haven���t looked back since. I had been following Christian homeschooling mother Amber Johnson on the internet for a while, and was thrilled when her new book came about that helps all families embrace their own heritage while honoring others. I love how she uses ���kinship��� in this context.

Purchase A Place to Belong: Celebrating Diversity and Kinship in the Home and Beyond by Amber O’Neal Johnston from Bookshop | Amazon.

What are you reading this Lent? What will you be reading with your kids? Will you choose something from this list? Please share in the comments, and don���t forget to subscribe to the Being in Community email list to get access to the Great Lent Picture Book Guide, a Guide to Helping Children Love Reading, AND a spiritual reading reflection guide! May God accept our fast this Lent as we look forward to the Holy Resurrection.

Looking for other Lenten spiritual reading ideas? Check out my book lists for 2022, 2021, 2020, 2019, 2018, and 2017. 

Need ideas to find time for reading, to start a reading habit, or get back into one? Check out my posts:

Building a reading habit and finding time to read

How I read 230 books in 2019

Some of the links above are affiliate links to Bookshop and Amazon to purchase the books suggested here. Using these links gives me a small commission, and this helps support my blog expenses. Purchasing books on Bookshop also helps local independent bookstores. Some of these books can be found at an even lower price used. If you use my Thriftbooks referral link , you and I will get a promotional code for a free book if you spend $30 or more.

What are you reading this Lent?

What I’m Reading this Lent (2023 Edition)

By Phoebe Farag Mikhail

This is my seventh year since staring Being in Community that I have shared my Great Lent reading list, and it has become one of my most popular posts. This year’s list includes some older books revived for a new audience, and a little more fiction than previous years. It seems my soul needs to be nourished by some holy imagination this Great Lent.

If you’re looking for Lent children’s book recommendations, check out my Great Lent Picture Book Guide, which contains multiple picture book suggestions for children, arranged according to each week of the Coptic Orthodox Church Great Lent lectionary.

Gregory of Nyssa: Sermons on the Beatitudes

I’ve hard several clergy recommend studying the Sermon on the Mount during the Great Lent, and I’ve been reading a lot by St. Gregory of Nyssa lately, so this his Sermons on the Beatitudes tops my list for Lenten reading this year.

Purchase Gregory of Nyssa: Sermons on the Beatitudes on Amazon.

Calmness by Pope Shenouda III

This wonderful book by His Holiness Pope Shenouda III of blessed memory, originally delivered as four sermons in Egypt and later translated to English, has been revised and re-published by Life Giving Springs Press in a beautiful hand-bound edition. The first English edition is available for download as a PDF here.  Purchases of the revised edition support St. Gregory American Coptic Orthodox Church in Anaheim, California to help build the parish community and activities for the youth and at-risk populations in the area. 

Purchase Calmness by Pope Shenouda III on Life Giving Springs | Amazon.

Mother Maria Skobtsova: Essential Writings

Also known as Mother Maria of Paris, this book contains Mother Maria Skobstova’s essential writings, as well as an extensive biography of her in the introduction by Jim Forest. Last year’s Lent Reading List included a wonderful picture book about this modern martyr, who lost her life in the Ravensbrück concentration camp in Germany for hiding Jews in her Paris convent.

Purchase Mother Maria Skobtsova: Essential Writings on Bookshop | Amazon.

Guirguis the Torchbearer by Iris Habib El-Masry

Topping my list of fiction books is this republished work of historical fiction by the late Iris Habib El-Masry, a Coptic Orthodox theologian and historian who is most well known for her two volume history, The Story of the Copts. The novel takes place in eighth century Egypt after the Arab conquest.

Purchase Guirguis the Torchbearer by Iris Habib El-Masry from St. Mary & St. Moses Abbey Press | Amazon.

Brisbane by Eugene Vodolazkin, translated by Marian Schwartz.

Laurus, the international bestseller by Russian author Eugene Vodolazkin has been on my to be read pile for a while, so when this English translation of his new book released in 2022, I resolved to read both this Lent. Brisbane takes place between Russia and Ukraine, in the memories of a musician suffering from Parkinson’s disease through his biographer.

Purchase Brisbane by Eugen Vodolazkin from Plough | Bookshop | Amazon.

The Lost Saint by Christine Rogers

I enjoyed Spyridon’s Shoes by Christine Rogers, so I happily picked up this historical fiction chapter book set in sixteenth century Greece during the Ottoman invasion of Rhodes. It tells the story of a boy separated from his family during battle, and features the little known St Phanourios, the saint that many Eastern Orthodox Christians call upon for looking for lost things.

Purchase The Lost Saint by Christine Rogers from Ancient Faith Publishing | Amazon.

Lent: The Season of Repentance and Renewal by Esau McCaulley

Anglican priest and theologian Esau McCaulley’s book, Reading While Black: African American Biblical Interpretation as an Exercise in Hope is on my TBR, so I quickly snapped up this new little book about Lent as well to read this season. I am always interested in reading how traditions different from mine approach the Great Lent. It helps me see my own tradition with fresh eyes.

Purchase Lent: The Season of Repentance and Renewal by Esau McCaulley from InterVarsity Press | Bookshop | Amazon.

Reclaiming Rest: The Promise of Sabbath, Solitude, and Stillness in a Restless World by Kate H. Rademacher

In many ways, the Great Lent can be seen as a time of solitude and stillness, and this book by Christian author and public health professional Kate Rademacher tells us how to do this practically in a world that actively works to prevent us from rest, reflection and stillness.

Purchase Reclaiming Rest: The Promise of Sabbath, Solitude, and Stillness in a Restless World by Kate H. Rademacher from Broadleaf | Bookshop | Amazon.

Pillars: How Muslim Friends Led Me Closer to Jesus by Rachel Pieh Jones

I highlighted Rachel Pie Jones’ excellent biography of Annalena Tonelli, Stronger than Death, in a previous Lent Book list. Pillars tells more of Rachel’s own story working in the Horn of Africa among Muslims, and how her relationships with them led her closer to Christ. Through them she discovers Christian tradition is deeper and wider than she once believed.

Purchase Pillars: How Muslim Friends Led Me Closer to Jesus by Rachel Pieh Jones from Plough | Bookshop | Amazon.

A Place to Belong: Celebrating Diversity and Kinship in the Home and Beyond by Amber O’Neal Johnston

Many of my readers might not know that I started homeschooling in the Fall of 2020 and haven’t looked back since. I had been following Christian homeschooling mother Amber Johnson on the internet for a while, and was thrilled when her new book came about that helps all families embrace their own heritage while honoring others. I love how she uses “kinship” in this context.

Purchase A Place to Belong: Celebrating Diversity and Kinship in the Home and Beyond by Amber O’Neal Johnston from Bookshop | Amazon.

What are you reading this Lent? What will you be reading with your kids? Will you choose something from this list? Please share in the comments, and don’t forget to subscribe to the Being in Community email list to get access to the Great Lent Picture Book Guide, a Guide to Helping Children Love Reading, AND a spiritual reading reflection guide! May God accept our fast this Lent as we look forward to the Holy Resurrection.

Looking for other Lenten spiritual reading ideas? Check out my book lists for 2022, 2021, 2020, 2019, 2018, and 2017. 

Need ideas to find time for reading, to start a reading habit, or get back into one? Check out my posts:

Building a reading habit and finding time to read

How I read 230 books in 2019

Some of the links above are affiliate links to Bookshop and Amazon to purchase the books suggested here. Using these links gives me a small commission, and this helps support my blog expenses. Purchasing books on Bookshop also helps local independent bookstores. Some of these books can be found at an even lower price used. If you use my Thriftbooks referral link , you and I will get a promotional code for a free book if you spend $30 or more.

What are you reading this Lent?

Confidence: My Word of the Year

By Phoebe Farag Mikhail 

My favorite song from The Sound of Music, “I Have Confidence” has inspired my word of the year for 2023. Maria, a novice out of place in her convent, accepts the challenge of becoming a governess for a family of seven children and a widowed captain. But these words could be song about anyone embarking on a new experience:

I’ve always longed for adventure

To do the things I’ve never dared

Now here I’m facing adventure

Then why am I so scared?

“Scared” doesn’t exactly describe my feelings about the adventures I’m facing. Trepidation might be a better word, or maybe even a little bit of imposter syndrome. Nonetheless, cultivating confidence will help me overcome these things.

I have emblazoned a sticker with this drawing by my friend Kathryn Tussing on my planner and my laptop. It’s also on the featured image. You can buy your very own here: Large confidence Sound of Music Vinyl Sticker 3×3 – Etsy

Maria sings her song about confidence while traveling towards her new adventure. She sings boisterously, swinging her bag and guitar and walking resolutely. She gives the word confidence energy and movement. Confidence propels her forward – and I want this energy. Kate Rademacher, author of Reclaiming Rest: The Promise of Sabbath, Solitude, and Stillness in a Restless World, pointed me to this Harvard Business Review study about managing our energy, rather than our time. One aspect of managing energy includes managing emotional energy:

“When people are able to take more control of their emotions, they can improve the quality of their energy, regardless of the external pressures they’re facing. Most people realize that they tend to perform best when they’re feeling positive energy. What they find surprising is that they’re not able to perform well or to lead effectively when they’re feeling any other way.”

Last year, I used Jennifer Fulwiler’s word of the year generator and it chose “build” for my word. That resonated with me, so I went with it. This year, I tried it three times and got, in this order:

CLEANSE

ORGANIZE

POSSIBLE

While I’m pretty sure that word generator must actually be in my house and wants to send me a message, no cleaning and organizing of my house with three children will be possible without the confidence (and its correlating energy) that I can do so.

It has become easy to confuse confidence with conceit, but confident is no more conceit than humility is self-abasement. Confidence and humility go hand in hand. If I know myself, if I can learn to examine myself clearly, if I can get honest feedback from the people I trust, then I should be able to have confidence about what I know to be my abilities and humility about what I know not to be. 

According to Psychology Today, “Confidence is a belief in oneself, the conviction that one has the ability to meet life’s challenges and to succeed—and the willingness to act accordingly.” Yet, confidence used to have a slightly different meaning. It wasn’t a belief in oneself, but a belief in the trustworthiness of another. In Scripture, “confidence” is often linked with confidence in God. We can be confident when we have God with us:

Do not be afraid of sudden terror,

Nor of trouble from the wicked when it comes;

For the Lord will be your confidence,

And will keep your foot from being caught.

(Proverbs 3:25-27)

So, too, Maria sings of confidence in what is constant and sure:

I have confidence in sunshine

I have confidence in rain

I have confidence that spring will come again

Besides, which you see

I have confidence in me

The sun always comes up, the rain comes when it is due, and the spring always comes after winter. It is easier to be confident when we have faith in what is true. What’s true for me is that even what I am lacking God will fill, and if I can’t do what I am called to do, I can do all things through Him who gives me strength (Philippians 4:13).

So, 2023, let’s do this. I have confidence!

What is your word of the year?

Buy your own “I Have Confidence” Sticker here: https://www.etsy.com/listing/1101300966/large-confidence-sound-of-music-vinyl

Here’s a list of recommended reads for new year: Books to Keep Up Your New Year’s Goals and Resolutions (with a giveaway!) – Being In Community

Subscribe to the Being in Community Newsletter and get a free annual reflection and planning printable here: Annual Reflection and Planning Journal: FREE Printable – Being In Community

Some of the links above are affiliate links to Bookshop and Amazon to purchase the books suggested here. Using these links gives me a small commission, and this helps support my blog expenses. Purchasing books on Bookshop also helps local independent bookstores. Some of these books can be found at an even lower price used. If you use my Thriftbooks referral link, you and I will get a promotional code for a free book if you spend $30 or more.

Thankful for my Fall/Winter Book Stack (2022)

By Phoebe Farag Mikhail

I have a delicious fall/winter book stack, I must say, and I’m glad I have the opportunity to share it with you! Many of these books also serve as wonderful holiday gifts, so consider this my 2022 holiday gift guide as well.

In fiction, I have four middle grade novels to share:

In a Dry Land by sisters Sonia and Sophia Samantaroy follows a group of three youth on Sunday school trip to the monastery gone awry. I read it aloud to my children in two days, and they all loved it. My oldest said “It was very good because of the adventure mixed with the church.” My middle child says “it was very suspenseful and it’s something you have to read in one sitting.” My youngest says “it was very good and you should learn from it that whenever you’re having trouble pray to God.” In addition to the book’s gripping story and important underlying message, what set it apart for my children are the young Coptic characters they could identify with, in a world of desert monasteries, saints, and church, that are were familiar with. This book makes a great gift for older elementary aged and middle school children, and a great Sunday school gift.

In a Dry Land by Sonia Samantaroy and Sophia Samantaroy: St. Moses Abbey Press |Bookshop | Amazon

The Fullness of Joy by Georgia Briggs from Ancient Faith Publishing sets itself apart immediately as an absolutely beautiful book to hold (and gift). Illustrated by the author, it tells the story of the beloved Russian St. Seraphim of Sarov through the eyes of a beloved bear named Joy. It helps to know a little about monasticism and asceticism to understand some of what goes on in the story. At the same time, it is immersive, getting us as close to the life and struggles of St. Seraphim without actually telling the story from his point of view. The bear carries her own pain when she meets St. Seraphim, and soon becomes his daily companion, believing herself to be of help to him, sometimes proud of the way she never leaves him the way the other animals do. We don’t get a happy ending so much as we get a peaceful and victorious one, which encapsulates St. Seraphim’s life and words perfectly.

The Fullness of Joy by Georgia Briggs: Ancient Faith Publishing | Amazon

In The Antidotes: Pollution Solution by Patricia Mechael, a group of young people band together to stop a plastic-eating bacteria from spewing toxins into their drinking water and making so many people in their community sick. Don’t let the scientific plot fool you – the kids also go through the typical teenage struggles of new friendships, bullying, difficult home circumstances, and also some of the unique circumstances that have befallen young people over the past three years due to the COVID-19 pandemic. I could not put this book down, and once I was done, my mind reeled with ideas for how to use it with my homeschooled children for both science and reading.

The Antidotes: Pollution Solution by Patricia Mechael: Bookshop | Amazon 

I posted about Sweep: The Story of a Girl and Her Monster by Jonathan Auxier on Instagram recently. It’s tough book for sensitive readers, but such a worthy one. I admit to crying after a specific chapter (can’t tell you why without spoilers). I talked through it with my kids, explaining how many of the struggles children faced in the Victorian era led to the child labor laws that protect children today (there are two great picture books about this: Mother Jones and Her Army of Mill Childrenby Jonah Winter and Nancy Carpenter, and Brave Girl: Clara and the Shirtwaist Makers’ Strike of 1909 by Michelle Markel and Melissa Sweet). I also reminded them that these things still happen to children but in different ways, so we still have a role to play, like paying attention to where we buy our clothes and advocating for fair labor practices. And lest we think child labor exploitation only happens in Chinese factories, a few weeks ago news broke about a Minnesota meat-packing plant that illegally employed over 30 children cleaning dangerous equipment overnight, with one already injured with chemical burns. Yet through the difficult things, Sweep is full of wonder, warmth, humor, and hope.

Sweep: The Story of a Girl and Her Monster by Jonathan Auxier: Bookshop | Amazon

I have read so many good picture books this year. Here are a few that stood out:

Philo, Liv, Loulou and the Peace SuperHoly by Mireille Mishriky is the sixth book in the favorite SuperHolies series. Colorfully and beautifully, it provides children with the tools to have peace when they are not feeling at peace and are afraid. Repeating Psalms, singing hymns, and remembering their role models- these are the tools the children use to conquer their fears and have a peaceful night. They also empower them to do the special thing that they want to do for their grandparents. Although it’s part of a series, this book also stands alone. See the link below for how to purchase a gift set of this book and a hand-sewn stuffy!

Philo, Liv, Loulou and the Peace SuperHoly by Mireille Mishriky:  Amazon | Bulk Orders | Complete the Series | For a unique gift this season, purchase the book with a Peace SuperHoly Stuffy from We the Copts!

When my children and I finished Wonder Walkers by Mina Archer, we went right back to the beginning and read it again, and again, savoring the words and illustrations. In it the children walk through different beautifully illustrated landscapes in wonder, asking questions that turn to imaginative metaphors. This makes an excellent, quiet bedtime book, a perfect gift for children and their parents who read it to them.

Wonder Walkers by Mina Archer: Bookshop | Amazon

A Twitter recommendation of The Voice that Won the Vote: How One Woman’s Words Made History by Elisa Boxer came at the exact right time: the midterm elections. After watching me spend hours watching Zoom debates to decide who to vote for in my local elections, one of my children commented that they hated politics and did not plan to vote. “It’s not like my one vote would matter anyway.” Enter this amazing true story of Febb Burn, whose letter to her son urging him to vote for women’s suffrage was the last single vote needed to pass the 19th Amendment, guaranteeing women in the USA the right to vote. We’re still having conversations about voting, but thanks to Febb Burn, we’re all convinced that every vote counts.

The Voice that Won the Vote by Elisa Boxer: Bookshop | Amazon.

Poetry

Mummy Eaters by Sherry Shenoda is a book of poetry you don’t want to miss—even if you don’t read poetry. These are poems that make your heart catch in your throat and your blood boil. It’s through these poems that I learned that Europeans ate Ancient Egyptian remains and used mummy flesh for a paint color mixture. Yes, really. I didn’t believe it till I looked it up for myself. Sherry somehow wove these savage facts into a powerful poetry collection about life and death, the past and the present, love and longing. I don’t think it would be possible to express what she has expressed in this book in anything but poetry. You can read the rest of my review on Goodreads. This book makes a GREAT gift for both readers and Egyptophiles, even if they don’t usually read poetry.

Mummy Eaters by Sherry Shenoda: University of Nebraska Press | Bookshop | Amazon

Newer nonfiction:

Hospitality for Healing by Melissa Naasko is an excellent guide and cookbook for anyone serves others through their cooking. I love that this book is both practical and spiritual. It’s not just about how to prepare meals for patients and loved ones on convalescent diets, but also about how important it is as a spiritual practice, and how to do this kind of service while also caring for a loved one’s emotional needs. Melissa infuses all this with her extensive experiences both giving and receiving hospitality for health. While you might be able to skim through recipes that aren’t currently useful to you, be sure to read till the end for a beautiful story of her experience with Ann Sullivan of Denver. Read my full review on Goodreads here. Another physically beautiful book, this makes a great gift for anyone in your life who loves to cook for others, or for anyone who is currently cooking for someone on a medical diet.

Hospitality for Healing by Melissa Naasko: Park End Books | Amazon

Any Christian going through storms in life, even in their own faith, will find solace in Traci Rhoades’ new book, Shaky Ground: What to Do After the Bottom Drops Out. Through her trademark holy curiosity, Traci draws from the practices of many Christian faith traditions that helped her feel grounded, even while the earth shifted beneath her feet. She also draws from many different experiences and voices, some of whose she has met online. I took my time reading this book, not because it was a slow read–quite the opposite. Traci’s conversational tone draws the reader in right away. I took my time so I could think about the practices she shared and how they could work in my life. One of them, looking for the faithful, I touched on more extensively in my last blog post. You can read my full review of this book on Goodreads.

Shaky Ground by Traci Rhoades: Church Publishing | Bookshop | Amazon

Professional Christian: Being Fully Yourself in the Spotlight of Public Ministry by Sarah Bereza. Sarah interviewed me and fifty other Christians in public ministry for this excellent book that seeks to provide a roadmap for any Christian who serves as a pastor, minister, lay leader, teacher, author, or any influencing role in which their Christian faith is integral. I’m learning so much from the others she has interviewed about fully living your faith authentically while also in the spotlight. Give this book to anyone involved in ministry in the public eye.

Professional Christian by Sarah Bereza: Westminster John Knox | Bookshop | Amazon

Tranquility by Tuesday: 9 Ways to Calm the Chaos and Make Time for What Matters by Laura Vanderkam fills all my expectations for my favorite time management author. I’ve reviewed several of her other books on this blog before (Off the Clock, Juliet’s School of Possibilities, and I Know How She Does It). For Tranquility by Tuesday, Laura did a Tranquility by Tuesday challenge with over 150 participants, focusing on nine “rules” that make any ordinary day a tranquil day. In so doing she helps readers see how these rules work out for people in real life. The way this book is organized makes it a great choice for book clubs or other groups—groups can read a chapter a month and try to implement each rule, then report back on the results. Laura has some great resources for doing that downloadable on her website here.

The nine rules are: give yourself a bedtime; plan on Fridays; move by three pm, three times a week is a habit, create a back-up slot, one big adventure, one little adventure; take one night for you; batch the little things; and effortful before effortless. Right now, as I try to build in some better habits in my life, my favorite one is “three times a week is a habit.”

Tranquility by Tuesday by Laura Vanderkam: Bookshop | Amazon

Mama, I See You: Finding Glimmers of Hope in the Trenches of Motherhood by Mirette Abraham is the book I needed when I became a new mom. It drew me right in with its first words. Mirette doesn’t hide her struggles with post-partum depression and miscarriage in this book. Any mother who has been through these experiences will feel seen and comforted. Each of her chapters offers hope, inspiration, and an invitation to look up toward God for our comfort and fulfillment. Mirette also hosts a podcast with Marina called The MAMI Village.

Mamma, I See You by Mirette Abraham: Bookshop | Amazon

I pre-ordered Untrustworthy: The Knowledge Crisis Breaking Our Brains, Polluting Our Politics, and Corrupting Christian Community by Bonnie Kristian as soon as I heard about it, and purchased copies for others as well. It’s an important book for our times, accurately describing the knowledge crisis that isn’t just breaking our brains but also ruining our relationships. She names the problem – an epistemological crisis – and then explains how it has worked. In the end she shares some possible solutions, but with a sobering reminder that there are some problems only the Holy Spirit can work through. This is a must read for anyone in religious leadership and anyone in a position of influence, whether a journalist, a writer, or any content creator.

Untrustworthy by Bonnie Kristian:  Bookshop | Amazon

Habib Girgis: Coptic Orthodox Educator and a Light in the Darkness by Bishop Suriel is on my reading stack because I’ve begun reading it again after taking a course on the Foundations of Religious Education with him at the Pope Shenouda Coptic Orthodox Theological Seminary. His book about Habib Girgis, the modern Coptic Orthodox religious educator who transformed religious education in the Coptic Orthodox Church is a fascinating, readable biography about one of the most important figures in modern Coptic history.

Habib Girgis by Bishop Suriel: SVS Press | Amazon

In keeping with C.S. Lewis’ wise advice to read old books, I’m reading a Christian classic: The Life of Moses by St. Gregory of Nyssa. St. Gregory is one of the Cappadocian Fathers and the brother and biographer of St. Macrina the Younger, one of my favorite saints. This isn’t just a book about the life of Moses the Archprophet, but a book about wisdom and wonder. I started reading it in search of a quote for a presentation. I couldn’t find the quote, but I got immersed in the book.

The Life of Moses by Gregory of Nyssa: Bookshop | Amazon

Are you looking for Advent reads? Check out my Orthodox Christian Advent Reading List.

Are you looking for more holiday gift ideas? Check out my holiday gift list for 2020, 2019, and a guide to socially conscious gift giving here.

My book, Putting Joy into Practice: Seven Ways to Lift Your Spirit from the Early Church, is a great gift and advent spiritual read: Paraclete Press | Bookshop | Amazon

Some of the links above are affiliate links to Bookshop and Amazon to purchase the books suggested here. Using these links gives me a small commission, and this helps support my blog expenses. Purchasing books on Bookshop also helps local independent bookstores. Some of these books can be found at an even lower price used. If you use my Thriftbooks referral link, you and I will get a promotional code for a free book if you spend $30 or more.

Subscribe to the Being in Community email list to be the first to hear about new posts and access free ebooks and resources.

Follow the Faithful Ones

by Phoebe Farag Mikhail

“Look for the faithful,” Traci Rhoades writes in her new book, Shaky Ground. When I read her words about who to look to in times of crisis, these words stuck, because I recognized that over the past two years, truly a period of “shaky ground” for almost everyone, that is what I have been doing.

Slightly altering Mr. Rogers’ famous words to children, “look for the helpers,” Traci writes:

When it comes to growing in the faith and finding those “helpers” with whom to surround ourselves in times of crisis, the faithful are our guides. They’re out there, only a step or two ahead of us, showing us what real and lasting change Jesus makes in a Christian’s life.

“Jim Forest” by jimforest is licensed under CC BY-NC-ND 2.0.

During the unprecedented global crises, sicknesses, and personal struggles, I recognized that my writing over the past two years has focused on faithful people. In my article for Plough, “An Angry Activist Becomes a Peacemaker,” I wrote about the Orthodox Christian peace activist Jim Forest, who died in January 2022. His life of faithfulness, despite the many, many setbacks and frustrations that can befall someone who works in social justice. His beautiful book The Ladder of the Beatitudes was on my 2022 Lenten reading list.

Also on that reading list was Fr. Deacon John Grisham’s book full of faithful people, Lent with the African Saints, and I got to interview him about it for Faithfully Magazine. During our interview he shared a story about St. Cyprian of Carthage in his life that didn’t appear in the article, but that he agreed I could share here:

Photograph edited from an icon called “Saints of Africa.”

[St. Cyprian] chased me down, he would not let me go. I spent half a year in Kenya and the Catholic missionaries I was working with in northern Kenya, were building these outstation churches, they were using Ethiopian style iconography which made me consider looking into this Orthodox thing. When I came back from Kenya there was an Orthodox Church in America parish at one time located near the Virginia Union University campus where I was doing some study in religion, St. Cyprian of Carthage Orthodox Church. I visited and I saw that on one side of the Iconostasis was a full size icon of St. Moses looking like my father, and another icon on the other side, of St. Cyprian looking like me, and the icon of Christ and the Theotokos were about the same skin tone as my mother, and all these white people were bowing down and kissing these icons. And just the image of St. Cyprian really caught my attention, but I went along my merry Baptist way. Several years later I was asking questions about how to deepen my prayer life. Then, while playing this video game called Second Life, just for fun I went looking for Orthodox Christians in Second Life, and, I kid you not they had a Second Life version of St. Catherine’s Monastery in Sinai. And one of the icons in this monastery was of St. Cyprian of Carthage. So I printed up a little picture of him from the internet… and I eventually came to visit that parish again, and I walked in… and I could almost imagine that icon of St. Cyprian looking back at me and saying, “told you to come home, boy.” 

Mother Irene at the door of St. Mercurius Monastery, Cairo, Egypt

I love hearing stories about faithful ones who “follow us around,” appearing in our lives when we least expect it. Mother Irene of blessed memory was one such saint for me. Although I never met her in person, I have learned so much from her example. I wrote about her and another important faithful role model in my life, Marie Assad, in my article for Faithfully, “Knitting Together the Community of Love: Lessons from Marie Bassilli Assaad and Mother Irene.” In it I draw from their lives and examples to answer the question, how can Christians work together for a just world?

There are faithful ones that remain faithful even in the gravest of injustices, like the 21 Martyrs of Libya. I wrote about them for Sojourners in “The 21 Martyrs Story Can’t Be Molded to Political Ends.”  Their faithfulness until death reminds us that victory through the cross is not an earthly victory but an eternal one.

The martyr Bishop Samuel

With my husband, Fr. Bishoy Lamie Mikhail, I wrote an article for Christianity Today about two faithful leaders who pastored and discipled Christians around the world through the ancient practice of letter writing: the martyr Bishop Samuel and Fr. Abadir El-Souriany of blessed memory in “Letter Writing Isn’t a Lost Art in Egypt. It’s an Ancient Ministry.”

I’ve had the honor of hosting the stories of other faithful ones on this blog. John Halim wrote about Fr. Luke Sidarous of blessed memory in “Take the Test: A Tribute to Fr. Luke Sidarous.” I wrote about my late mother in law, Wedad Gendy, in “Muscle Memory.” My sister Dr. Mary Farag wrote about St. Pachomious in “Plague, Paschaltide, and Pachom: What is Really at Stake during a Pandemic.” Nardine Loka wrote about Tasoni Angel of blessed memory in “Just to Look At Her Face: A Tribute to Tasoni Angel.” I share some wise words from the late Uncle Sameh Mitry in “Please do not spend hours praying… and other wise words for the college bound, twenty-three years later.”

Princess Ileana of Romania

I wrote about Mother Alexandra of blessed memory in my review of her memoir in “From the Battlefield to the Monastery: A Memoir Not to Be Missed.” In “The Giants Who Walked Before Us,” I wrote about two women whose generation helped build the Coptic community in the United States, the late Tant Awatef Geerges and the late Tant Souad Sourial. And in “I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth,” I wrote about the departure of Fr. Youhanna Tadros.

Mr. Roger’s advice to “look for the helpers” is advise to children in crisis. As adults, our injunction is not to look for the helpers but to be the helpers. Similarly, while we all, young and old, should “look for the faithful,” in Rhoades’ words, we also need to grow into being the faithful that others look to. But there is no better way to do so than to learn from the models these faithful people give to us to emulate, build the virtues they cultivated and live the wisdom they shared.

Subscribe to the Being in Community Email Newsletter and check out my free subscriber-only resources.

Purchase my book Putting Joy into Practice from Bookshop here, from Paraclete Press here for bulk discounts, from Amazon here, and from wherever books are sold.

Some of the links above are affiliate links to Bookshop and Amazon to purchase the books suggested here. Using these links gives me a small commission, and this helps support my blog expenses. Purchasing books on Bookshop also helps local independent bookstores. Some of these books can be found used at an even lower price. If you use my Thriftbooks referral link, you and I will get a promotional code for a free book if you spend $30 or more.