John Harrell's Blog, page 3

Without a Net

Sometimes life presents us with opportunities. And sometimes those opportunities are not asked for, nor are they welcomed.

Last night I was having drinks with a friend of mine who I hadn’t seen in a while. We have spoken but our calendars didn’t align until yesterday. Two years ago this month, his oldest son took his own life. It’s one of those heartbreaking stories of loss. This is a good family which makes it even harder.

My friend manages a charitable thrift shop. The other thing the store does is run a food pantry. Every Saturday, they give away 1,500 boxes of food. Three years ago it was around 250 boxes per week. They are helping thousands of people in the Central Texas area.

My friend got a new boss a while back. His supervisor is good at looking at the bottom line because he quickly noticed the store loses money. This man completely misses the point. The store is underwritten by a very large church. It’s charity. This “supervisor” put my friend on notice that he was in danger of losing his job if the bottom line doesn’t improve. What a tool.

My friend wants to do something to help others who have lost a child. Empathy is shared experience, and he can listen, understand and guide others who find themselves in similar situations.

My thoughts are, perhaps God is doing my friend a favor by presenting him with this fork in the road. My hope is he steps out without a safety net and lets God steer his steps. He’s a good, good hearted guy who can make a difference. And isn’t that what makes this crazy life worthwhile?

It’s time. Trusting God when you’re scared is an indescribable act of faith. It’s time…

Holding On

There’s a television show I have heard about called “Hoarders.” The theme of the show is to feature people who struggle with Compulsive Hoarding Disorder. They can’t let anything go and end up living in a practical junkyard.

Even people who don’t have a malady hold on tightly to stuff, including life. They use Botox and photo filters to try to remain youthful. And the medical profession has a multitude of drugs to extend our lives if we haven’t taken care of ourselves. Everyone wants just a little more.

I have three thoughts on death: 1) I’m not afraid of it because I know where I’m going. 2) I’m not ready for it. And, 3) I don’t want it to hurt! Pretty simple, huh? But when that inevitable time comes, I’m going to perfection while leaving a broken planet. Why hold on?

Create beautiful memories while you are here. Try to live a life that is meaningful and fulfilling. Hold on to the good people in your life. You hold them in your heart…

Remember When…

What a great time to be alive! We have self-driving cars, immediate access to the internet without going through a squawking box, robotic surgery and way too many other incredible things to list. I’m constantly amazed at what I see.

But with all of the modern marvels in our world, let’s not forget the most important part: people. People are important. All people. It matters not whether they are poor or have great resources. Everyone matters.

Our world is facing an enormous challenge. We live in the most connected era ever, yet more people than ever are experiencing loneliness. According to many polls, about 20% of our population are experiencing loneliness and isolation. It doesn’t have to be this way.

If you haven’t heard from your friends in a while, take a moment to reach out and check on them. Your simple act of kindness might be exactly what someone needs right now. Take the time…

The Home Stretch

September has arrived! We are in the final one-third of the calendar year. How did the year fly by so quickly? Someone told me they even saw a Christmas ad on television recently.

Did you set any goals for 2025? Sometimes we call them resolutions. Studies show that over 90% of the population set them, and a majority abandon them before the end of January. If you are in the majority, don’t beat yourself up. Take action.

Here’s a proposal: set one goal for the last four months of the year. Maybe you begin an exercise program three days per week. Broken down into smaller increments, you are committing to exercise a total of 54 times between now and December 31st. Now the goal doesn’t seem so high, right? By the time 2026 arrives you will be well on your way!

Flip the script on life. Adopt the attitude that no matter what life throws your way, you will get your weekly goal accomplished. It’s not too late to regain your health and wellness unless you believe it is.

Take care of yourself. Be accountable, but don’t knock yourself around when mistakes happen. There are plenty of low thinkers around to do that. Pay no attention to them.

Believe in yourself and get to work…

Practice

Do you want to learn a new skill? If your answer is yes, I have a practical solution for you.

Commit to studying or practicing for 20 minutes per day. No outside distractions. No phone or computer. Just focused effort. Over the course of one year, you will have accomplished 120 hours of study/practice time if you’re doing 20 minutes per day.

Consistency is the most important piece of this equation. Don’t take days off. Not even one day. Within a few weeks you will have formed a new habit. Your proficiency will grow if you stay with it.

Learning something new is both exciting and challenging. Try it! After all, your personal growth is worth more than 20 minutes a day…

Irredeemable? No!

Everyone falls and experiences setbacks and temporary failures. In this life you cannot escape it. Failure is never final unless you decide it is.

The world is hard. This isn’t eternity where everything is perfect. So, what do you do when you get knocked on your ass? You get right back up and keep going. You must develop the mindset that you’re unstoppable. This doesn’t mean you will run over people to get where you want to go. It means you refuse to give up when the droughts of life appear.

The world is watching you, too. Sadly, most people like to see you fail. That’s sick, but it’s just how some people are. When you have a small handful of people who are pulling for you, praying for you and wanting you to succeed, keep those people close. They are a treasure.

Be your own best advocate. Don’t let anyone or anything stop you in your pursuit of a fulfilling life. And the best news? God is pulling for you. He created you exactly how he wanted you to be. He doesn’t make mistakes, nor does he have second thoughts.

Your next success is probably around the next corner. But you gotta turn the corner to find it…

Cracker Culture

The term “cracker” devolved from being a braggart in old England to describing poor, uneducated southerners. Sometimes it’s used in a derogatory way, but it’s all in how you take it.

In days past, I have been called a cracker. This has always made me laugh because I like crackers! And the tone of the person calling me cracker was playful, not antagonistic or rude. It’s not what you say but how you say it. Tone is what matters.

I’m a southerner, a proud Texan. We have a different swagger about us. Texans carry themselves differently, even if they can’t carry a tune! We love our barbecue, we support the Dallas Cowboys in spite of Jerry Jones, and we work hard. Challenge a northerner to make grits and you might be met with a dumbfounded look. But we forgive them for their ignorance.

People use the internet to call other people names, some that are not kind. Unlike my friends who called me a cracker, these people are trying to say something hateful and offensive. They are trying to get a rise out of me. They will be waiting for a very long time. Name calling is a sign of low intelligence and weakness. Don’t engage.

Football kicks off this weekend. This cracker will be watching the University of Texas game. And I might, just might have some brisket and beer!

I hope you enjoy your day as well…

Smile!

There are approximately 640 muscles in the human body that we can control. It only takes about 12 of them to smile. That’s about 1.8% of our total, so it’s a very small number. Why aren’t people smiling more?

There’s a lot of darkness in our broken world. People do some truly awful things to others. When a person has dealt with horrific trauma, it might be difficult for them to muster a smile. That’s understandable.

Yet, I believe we can almost always find something to bring a smile to our faces: A child playing with a dog or a toy. Some funny movies. Or the politicians. They say and do some colossally stupid things. You gotta laugh.

I love interacting with strangers. Perhaps it’s someone at a Starbucks or a sandwich shop. If I can bring a smile to a stranger, I believe it might make their day a little better. I love to make people laugh.

Find something to smile about every day. You can find something, even if it’s something small. Try it and watch your life improve…

Running

Up until the early 1900’s running was mostly done in competitions. Non-athletes would use other methods to get fit. In the 1960’s, Bill Bowerman, co-founder of Nike published a book called “Jogging.” The book sold hundreds of thousands of copies, and Nike went on to sell hundreds of millions of pairs of shoes.

People are great actors. Some have created a facade so great that their performance is worthy of an Oscar. They want others to believe they have it all together, that their lives are near perfect. Their insecurities run deep. In truth, these people might be doing everything they can to just hold it together. Inside they might be on the edge.

In my life I took a lot of doubts and insecurities into my 20’s. My ego was off the charts, but it was false ego. My parents did very little to prepare me for adulthood, so I was left to my own devices. It wasn’t always pretty.

Today, I can say that my demons have been exorcised. It took a lot of hard work and self-examination. That wasn’t always pretty, either! But peace and contentment were found on the other side.

Do the work. No matter how far or how fast you run, you can never run away from you…

Crazy Days

As long-term readers know, my childhood was not filled with happy memories. My parents were cruel, angry people who projected their brokenness into the lives of their children. Fear, chaos and sometimes violence ruled the day in our home.

There has been a lot of good that came from my background. After doing the work to become a whole person through forgiveness, I have been fortunate to share my story with others who were raised in a similar manner. Dysfunctional homes are way more common than you think. And the cycle continues unless you make a decision that it stops with you.

Another benefit I was gifted with is a condition called tachypsychia. This means that when the shit hits the fan all around me, my thinking becomes crystal clear and lucid. Time seems to slow down and there’s no panic for me. There have been too many times when this has happened to me before to describe.

Everything can be used for good. Things happen, sometimes really bad things that we didn’t ask for. You can wallow in it, full of self-pity, or you can work through it. My choice was to face my inner demons and extract them from my psyche. It was not easy, but it was worth it.

My encouragement to you is, you aren’t alone even though you may feel like you are. Do the work…