Laura Freeman's Blog, page 25

The Last Offer

The Last Offer by Chasity Bowlin 2016 Regency Novella

This novella introduces us to Olivia shortly after being rescued with her brother Algernon Dunne arriving at an inn where his former best friend Lord Burke Holland has taken her after saving her from Melville, a man who kidnapped her and was going to force her to marry him for her fortune.

A year passes and Olivia is a social outcasts for no fault of her own and decides to take a lover. She chooses Burke and Algernon tells Burke about Olivia’s plans. He also confesses he never told Olivia that Burke offered for her which caused their rift in friendship.

Burke loves Olivia but knows he has to be her lover to convince her to marry him. Bowlin also shows that Melville was only working for Hurston, who is still plotting to kidnap Olivia and force her to marry him. He hires two thugs to follow her.

Bowlin describes Olivia’s deflowering in detail and readers who like instruction in lovemaking will find those passages interesting. Olivia is kidnapped by the two thugs and in true Regency plotting, Burke rescues her.

The story was well written except for some Point of View ping pong matches in the early chapters. I want to focus on expanding a novella into a full novel. Our heroine is kidnapped twice but the reader knows nothing about the details. A writer should show rather than tell. Show Olivia being abducted, her fight, her fears, and all the emotions that go with a traumatic event. Put your characters in danger to show their strengths. We only have a hint of Olivia’s gumption.

In addition, the story could have been started earlier at a ball where she longs for Burke to dance with her and to show off her popularity to contrast with the rejection later after Melville’s abduction. We’re told she was popular but show that popularity and how it affects her attitude, pride, and reaction in how others treat her. Most women can identify with being gossiped about and the range of emotions that come with the hurt, helplessness, and facing the attacker or running away. None of this is shown in a novella but can be expressed in a novel.

Burke and Algernon could have been developed more as well. In addition, the villain, Hurston, remains a mystery except for a few details. In a novel, the villain needs to be developed to contrast with the hero and heroine and to be a worthy adversary.

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The Wolf and the Dove

The Wolf and the Dove by Kathleen E. Woodiwiss 1974 Avon Books

This historic romance is set in 1066 Saxony when William of Normandy and his knights are conquering England and the Saxons.

Beautiful red-haired Aislinn is lady of Darkenwald, and Norman Ragnor kills her father and sacks the village with his knights. He claims Aislinn and rapes her. His leader Sir Wulfgar arrives and is angry with Ragnor for killing the serfs he needs to work his claimed land of Darkenwald. He takes Aislinn but refuses to rape her. He waits for her to come to him. Ragnor is obsessed with Aislinn and vows to get her back. Her bethrothed Kerwick also wants her but is chained with the dogs.

The first one-hundred pages is a battle of wills between Aislinn and Wulfgar who refuses to wed her and believes he can leave her and forget her when he grows tired of her. He hates women because his Norman mother told her Saxon husband, Bolgar, that Wulfgar wasn’t his son but a Norman’s child.

The three men fight for Aislinn’s favor with plenty of description about lusts. Poor Aislinn loses gown after gown as she tries to maintain her dignity. She falls in love with Wulfgar, but he won’t pledge love or marriage to her. Then Bolgar arrives with Wulfgar’s shrewish sister Gwyneth. She reminds Wulfgar he is a bastard and treats Aislinn like a slave and whore. She has her whipped, but Wulfgar’s loyal servant stops her. Aislinn’s mother Maida sinks into madness.

Wulfgar goes off to battle with his knights and runs into a family with a young widow woman, Haylen who wants Wulfgar and tries to seduce him. He calls out Aislinn’s name and realizes she is the only woman for him. He sends the family to the castle, and Haylen hints that she has been bedded by Wulgar, tormenting Aislinn more. How much can this poor girl take?

Woodiwiss contrasts the shrewish deceitful woman against Aislinn, who is kind and proud. Wulfgar is compared to Ragnor who is cruel and deceitful. You want them to pay for their cruelty and Woodiwiss delivers. Kerwick and Haylen learn the error of their behavior.

William is crowned king, and Wulfgar sends for Aislinn. He buys her gowns and a horse, something he swore he never would do for a woman. The King orders Aislinn and Ragnor to jousts with the winner claiming Aislinn. Wulfgar wins but does not propose marriage even though everyone is telling him he should wed her.

Aislinn is pregnant but is not sure who the father is. Wulfgar thinks he can send the child away to escape the shame of being a bastard as he was when he was a boy. Aislinn and her mother leave the castle because she won’t give up her unborn child.

Will Wulfgar go after Aislinn and claim the child as his own? Will Ragnor and Gwyneth seek revenge? Woodiwiss knows how to build to a final climax and deliver. She also turns in a little surprise that redeems the bodice ripper.

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The Governess Gambit

The Governess Gambit by Erica Ridley 2010 Regency

This is a prequel to The Wild Wynchesters series which follows the adventures of six orphans, now grown, to help those in need. This story shares the special talents of the Wynchester siblings taken in by Baron Vanderbean or Bean as he is known by his family.

Chloe, first taken in as a child, is now 28, and spies on Parliament through a vent in the ceiling to find out what legislation is being passed to help orphans and the poor. She has a crush on Lawrence Gosling, the Marquess of Lanbrooke, who is a champion of the poor.

His father, the Duke of Faircliffe, is a drunk and gambler who comes to Bean asking for money. He steals back a painting of Puck and six fairies which represents the family, hoping to sell it, but wrecks his carriage and dies.

Lawrence ignores their pleas to have the painting returned, especially when Bean becomes ill. This sets up the next book in which Chloe steals the painting. The rest of this story has Chloe taking a job at a school for girls which takes in orphans as free labor. She hopes to find proof of the lies and free the girls.

The story is short but includes a couple chapters from the next book which brings Chloe and Lawrence together in a typical Regency novel. Lawrence needs to marry a rich woman to pay off his father’s debts and restore his inheritance. Chloe dislikes him for ignoring her and her siblings. In the middle is Philippa, whose family is wealthy but has no title. How will they resolve their problems?

Most Regency novels follow a typical pattern of someone wealthy wanting love and someone poor needing money. Ridley adds social struggles to the stories of the ton. Chloe wants to help others the way Bean helped her. I would have liked more of that shown in the story. I wanted to get to know Chloe and her siblings more. Hopefully, the series will do that.

Ridley gave the barest of information: George can climb any structure, Jacob trains animals, Tommy or Thomasina is a master of disguises, Elizabeth can throw her voice, and Marjorie is an art forger. It is an interesting group and readers can look forward to the future adventures of the Wynchesters.

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Murder on the Half-Skull

Alfred Hitchcock’s Murder on the Half-Skull

This is a collection of short stories about murder with the twists often found in Alfred Hitchcock stories or the classic O’Henry tales. If you’re looking to add a surprise twist to your stories, this might give you some ideas.

One story is about a man who works nights in a bad neighborhood and keeps his lunch in a briefcase so he can throw it at a robber and make his getaway. One night two men with guns approach him and he throws the briefcase before running. Only he sees two more men with guns and another pair so he hides in a store where he sees a man and knocks him out before escaping. The next morning he discovers the man in the store was a thief the FBI were looking for who had placed his stolen money in a briefcase.

Another story has a football player drowning his poor girlfriend on a lake so he can marry a rich girl. Think “A Place in the Sun” with Liz Tayler and Montgomery Clift. Only this guy feels so guilty he can’t play football and the rich girl drops him.

In another tale, a cocky young hitchhiker talks about a murderer on the loose and how he fits the description. Then the driver says he’s dyed his red hair brown or he would fit the description. Ooops.

Another story has a man spend a year in jail for vehicular homicide but can’t remember the details. He pieces the events together but the results aren’t what he expected.

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A Wicked Wager

A Wicked Wager by Adele Clee 2018 Regency

I’ve had bad luck with some of the novels I’ve read recently but this one turned out to be a gem. It is the second novel in a series but can be read alone. It also makes me want to read the other books in the series.

A group of friends have returned from India to London in 1820 which ties the Avenging Lords series together. Each one is bent on seeking revenge against someone who has slandered or ruined someone in their family.

Devlin Drake is seeking revenge against Baron Bromfield and his daughter Hannah, who slandered his brother, Ambrose, who was mysteriously killed. Devlin and his friends are rolling dice with Bromfield, and Devlin wagers his estate Blackwater against marriage to Bromfield’s daughter.

Bromfield and Hannah are screeching, arrogant, elitist who are outraged about losing the wager but they find a way out by offering Bromfield’s illegitimate daughter, Juliet, as his wife, expecting him to call off the wager. Instead Devlin agrees to marry the abused and completely honest Juliet.

Bromfield wants Juliet to find letters at Blackwater but she confides to Devlin that she thinks there is more to the letters than a confession from Hannah about her role in Ambrose’s death. She hatches a plan and Devlin backs her up.

Cree knows how to develop her characters and make the reader care about them. Juliet is put in danger several times and Devlin has a few secret demons he must deal with as he falls in love with his wife. Cree also adds a twist about the letters that keeps the reader turning the pages of the novel. There are several bad guys and each plays a vital role in the story. The revenge comes but not in the way Devlin had first planned.

Writers, if you’re looking at how to write a romance, this is a good example. The point of view slips back and forth between the hero and heroine, a must in a modern romance, and reveals how each interprets the circumstances that have brought them together. They battle what to reveal of their feelings, but Cree knows how to release information and emotions in a steady stream so the reader never loses interest.

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Freedom Fire

Freedom Fire by Elizabeth Evelyn Allen 1986 Warner Books

This story takes place during the beginning of the Revolutionary War with Rebecca Rayburn hiding from suitor Roger Tupton who only wants to marry her for her money. Her uncle Jonathan hides her, but when sea captain Philip Keane buys his property, Rebecca asks Keane to marry her in name only. Keane has a mistress, Paulette, he’s grown tired of and marries Rebecca.

There are lots of backstories about Rebecca’s mother, the Abenaki Indians she befriended, and her work for her father and uncles writing stories. She also is a talented artist. Keane knows none of this and doesn’t appreciate it. They mutually consummate their marriage days after their marriage. Rebecca is independent and resourceful. She has the ability to talk her way out of trouble and has to use her maiden name on occasion. When Roger kidnaps her, she is able to convince his uncles she is married with the wedding ring she purchased.

I didn’t like Keane. He sleeps with Paulette several times after he marries Rebecca and fathers a child with Paulette. He also has other affairs when he thinks Rebecca is with Roger. The author wanted to point out the double standard for men who can have affairs after marriage and the harsher penalty for women. But a rule in a romance novel is to never have the hero cheat on the heroine once he realizes he loves her. Keane also has to have others tell him what a great wife he has because he can’t realize it himself.

When Rebecca learns Keane is dead, she falls in love with Kent, an honorable man who loves the children she has adopted. She marries him and loves him for his goodness and stability. She is pregnant with his child when she learns Keane is alive and in prison.

Rebecca is a great heroine, but the story was weighed down by a lot of history and family members on each side of the conflict. She was used by the men around her and never given credit for her role. The author had plenty of sex between the hero and heroine, but there wasn’t a strong relationship beyond that. He was always yelling at her, and Rebecca had to defend her actions while he never apologized for his cheating. 

A romance writer has to keep her characters apart, but they shouldn’t behave so badly that you think the heroine is better off without him.

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Trials of Artemis

Trials of Artemis by Sue London 2013 Graythorn Publishing

Most Regency romances have plucky heroines and disreputable rakes thrown together against their wills to salvage her reputation or provide an heir. After a series of events including balls, carriage races, smugglers and more, the two share a chaste kiss.

This is not that type of Regency romance but a more modern version which develops the characters and has points of view from the hero and the heroine to show how they perceive the situation. Writers need to become familiar with POV and use it wisely to show the development of their characters and develop the plot.

Sue London is able to take a predictable genre and breathe new life into it with a plucky heroine whose honesty and intelligence challenges the hero, who is good and kind but has a tradition idea of the role of women. London adds humor with logic and I recommend her books.

Jacqueline Walters is not wealthy but part of the ton. She is unfortunately a bluestocking and likes reading books instead of flirting with gentlemen like her younger sister, Samantha. In fact Jacqueline (Jack) has formed a group called the Haberdashers with her two best friends, who will be featured in future books. They have spent their teens racing horses and battling with weapons and go by boys’ names because “boys have more fun.”

Jacqueline goes into the library to read a rare Greek book during a ball and his seduced by Gideon, the Earl of Harington. He realizes she is not the woman he thought just as they are discovered by the host, and they are forced to announce their engagement. This is a typical plot for most Regency novels but London takes it beyond the normal misunderstandings. Both admit they don’t want to marry and search for replacements, but the marriage is forced to avoid a scandal and ruin Samantha’s chance of making a good match.

The reactions of the two characters to each other is dealt with logic and humor. She is overwhelmed by his wealth and her new responsibilities and he is shocked by her collection of weapons and inquisitive mind.

London subtly reveals the class barriers and roles of men and women in the very structured Regency times but also shows Jaqueline and Gideon’s challenging the roles of what is expected of them.

Sex is rarely shown in a Regency novels but London doesn’t follow this rule and many modern writers ignore it as well. Gideon gives Jacqueline a book on sex and is descriptive in their lovemaking but in a tasteful way.

 Their marriage has its ups and downs. Gideon cannot say “I love you” and Jaqueline is shocked to find out Gideon is Lord Lucifer, a man who showed her friend’s brothers around London’s brothels before settling down to Parliament work. Their differences on women’s rights and other politically-charged topics nearly ends their marriage. They work through their differences as adults, which I enjoyed better than misunderstandings or lies that keep a couple apart until the final chapter.

In true Regency fashion, smugglers are part of the plot, but London provides a twist that sets this story apart from being predictable. Writers need to provide new and interesting characters, plots, and surprises to entice readers to their stories.

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Line Up For Murder

Line Up For Murder by Marian Babson 1980 Warner Books

Years ago I got up around 4 a.m. on Black Friday to wait in line to buy Christmas gifts. It was the one and only time because I hate crowds, but there is a strange comradery in standing in line with people focused on the same goal. This story captures that experience.

This story takes place in England with several characters getting into a queue or line in front of Bonnard’s for their January 4 blowout sale. This allows the author to focus on this group and allows the reader to get to know them.

We have Dorrie who is the veteran line squatter with her sleeping bag, hot water bottle, and children bringing food and necessities. She also knows that they can use the bathroom at the St. Edmund’s Hotel across the street as long as someone saves their spot. Dorrie is there to purchase a deluxe fridge-freezer.

The others in line include a couple looking for furniture; Zoltan, a foreigner looking for fur coats to resell; Lucy Bone who is revealed to be the estranged daughter of Lucian Bonnard, owner of the store; her companion, Sakim, who proves to be a not very nice man; and Tony Adair, a would-be filmmaker hoping to buy camera equipment.

Dorrie enjoys camping out to become acquainted with the others in line, but this group isn’t as sociable as she would like. Lucy doesn’t want anyone to find out who she is, but her father and his fiancée, Maggie, recognize her from a photo and try to make contact with her by hosting a cocktail party for those in line.

Lucian and Maggie think Lucy is going to do something to cause a scandal. She is a spoiled girl who has come between her father and possible wives in the past, and Maggie is worried.

The ending is foreshadowed but not exactly in the way anticipated. The action is presented quickly in the final chapter so don’t peek.

This suspense story hints at trouble early on and builds by letting the reader become acquainted with the characters before revealing the crime at the end.

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A Trace of Death

A Trace of Death by Blake Pierce 2018

The writing is crisp and fast paced where the detective is a female “Dirty Harry” who breaks rules in the pursuit of justice.

Pierce introduces us to Ashley Penn, who is kidnapped on her way home from high school. Detective Keri Locke receives the phone call from Ashley’s mother, Mia Penn, and decides to talk to the mother although other police officers think Ashley simply ran away from home. Her partner, Ray, tries to talk her out of it.

Pierce gives Keri a past. Her daughter, Evie, was abducted five years earlier and that ties her strongly to Ashley’s abduction. Her partner, Ray, was a boxer and lost his right eye in a fight. Their tragedies destroyed their old lives, and they are building new ones. Because this is a series, Pierce hints that their relationship could develop into something more personal.

Mia is married to Senator Stafford Penn and his reaction to his daughter being missing raises alarm bells. Keri follows the suspects from one to another as she tracks down Ashley. Her interrogations often turn violent, which reveals how close to the edge she is to losing it. Pierce is good at showing Keri’s personality, determination, and weaknesses. 

Pierce leads us from a dumped boyfriend to a new boyfriend who introduced Ashley to drugs and reveals a dark path Ashley was heading down and makes it believable that she ran off, especially when a note from Ashley is found. But Keri trusts her instincts. She rescues a runaway she initially mistakes for her daughter and tucks away a clue that may help Keri find Evie when this case is over.

Pierce has several short scenes from Ashley’s point of view where she is trapped in a silo and makes plans to escape. This revs up the tension and is an important technique a writer can use in a story like this.

Pierce foreshadows Keri’s recklessness and when she goes in alone to confront the kidnapper, it is expected. The outcome is brutal but fulfills the need for the heroine to defend herself and bring the criminal to justice.

The only drawback was the kidnapper, who was not well developed. Pierce gave the reader a glimpse of his depravity but I would have liked a few scenes from his POV to give insight into the darker side that he hid and reveal his motivation beyond an interest in “experiments.”

This is the first book in a series starring Keri and I recommend the book. It kept me on the edge of my seat and was a quick read.

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Victory’s Woman by Gretchen Genet

 

Victory’s Woman by Gretchen Genet 1994 Kensington Publishing

This story has a lot of violence so be warned. The year is 1779 when the colonies were fighting for their independence. But the story begins with a fight against the Shawnees. Capt. Niall McLane is the seasoned frontier warrior who witnessed his father tortured and mutilated by the Shawnee and then was held prisoner for 13 months. He has moments of maddening violence that he struggles to control, but is admired for his courage and his known as the “Wolf.”

Along with him is young Lt. Andrew Wade, a Virginia tobacco farmer with a wife, Clarice, and infant son, William. He has joined the Indian fighters but has never killed a man. They mistake a couple of canoes filled with Shawnee as an easy assault, but the soldiers fall into a trap and are outnumbered. Niall leads them through the wall of warriors, but Andrew panics and is castrated when Shawnees overpower him. Niall saves his life, but Andrew turns to alcohol after he returns home, partly for cowardice and partly for his celibate life. Clarice is running the plantation alone and trying to be a good wife, but when William dies from smallbox, she loses heart.

Niall is forced to resign his commission after refusing to give quarter in a battle and arrives in Williamsburg. He makes enemies of Tom and Walter Hawk, who are tormenting a young man, Robert, who has a port wine stain on his face. When Niall defends Robert, he becomes obsessed with him and wants to become the “Wolf.”

Sheriff Wigget doesn’t like Niall for fighting with the Hawk brothers and then courting his girl, Polly. When Walter Hawk falls from a bridge, his death is ruled accidental, but the sheriff questions Niall, who now works for Andrew and Clarice as their overseer. Niall  convinces them to hire Robert, but he spies on all three. His creepiness increases, and he cuts off bear claws from a rug at the tavern where he once worked and steals a wolf’s head from a carnival to create his costume of terror.

The violence escalates with the brutal slaying of Sam, the driver for Clarice, and she is attacked as well before the “Wolf” disappears. She tells the sheriff it wasn’t Niall even though she isn’t positive, but the sheriff targets Niall when Tom’s wife and Polly are brutally raped and killed with claws and a long knife. Niall is arrested and faces trial.

The ending is extremely violent and breaks a cardinal rule about the heroine not being violated by the villain. It created an unsettling ending even with a few pages of hope added on. This book reminded me of the “Outlander” because of the intensity of the violence, but did not have the sweet romantic moments necessary to balance that darkness.

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