Cameron Darrow's Blog, page 15
April 11, 2020
The Joy of Cutting
I've talked about this before, but with every book I seem to forget how good it feels to cut stuff. When I get to the point in a book where I'm down to axing pieces of it and beginning to refine what's left, that's when the story comes alive. It become a book, and not a collection of scenes I cobbled together over months. They start to cohere, and I can finally start to see the whole of what I've been doing.
To me, it's the best part. The raw creation of the first two drafts can be laborious and very easy to get lost in. There's a lot of room for interpretation, but when you have scenes that are separated by pages in the story but by weeks or months in your head, it can be hard to feel like you're doing anything but vomiting out ideas. I do use an outline, but give myself lots of wiggle room. I'm a character writer first, and I have to spend time with them to figure out who they really are, and sometimes they have different ideas about what story they're in than I do.
I've cut a bunch from my current WIP, and it feels much better. It really does feel like you're unburdening yourself of something when you finally pull the trigger on yanking something that you knew for a while needed to go.
The WIP much leaner and tighter now; it's becoming a book. It's my first standalone novel, and I already know is going to be my shortest book by far, which is what I wanted. The Ashes books are all 110,000+ word leviathans, so the relative breakneck pace of this one has been a nice change.
Still a ways to go, but I am looking forward to being able to share the first details with you, hopefully soon. Have to think of a name for it first!
To me, it's the best part. The raw creation of the first two drafts can be laborious and very easy to get lost in. There's a lot of room for interpretation, but when you have scenes that are separated by pages in the story but by weeks or months in your head, it can be hard to feel like you're doing anything but vomiting out ideas. I do use an outline, but give myself lots of wiggle room. I'm a character writer first, and I have to spend time with them to figure out who they really are, and sometimes they have different ideas about what story they're in than I do.
I've cut a bunch from my current WIP, and it feels much better. It really does feel like you're unburdening yourself of something when you finally pull the trigger on yanking something that you knew for a while needed to go.
The WIP much leaner and tighter now; it's becoming a book. It's my first standalone novel, and I already know is going to be my shortest book by far, which is what I wanted. The Ashes books are all 110,000+ word leviathans, so the relative breakneck pace of this one has been a nice change.
Still a ways to go, but I am looking forward to being able to share the first details with you, hopefully soon. Have to think of a name for it first!
April 4, 2020
Theme
Theme is a tricky thing to try to talk about, because it's not something that I go about actively trying to inject into my stories. I certainly don't start there, at any rate. For me, it grows organically out of the story. All of the little threads that tie the characters together usually end up making a pattern of some type, and to me, that's when theme emerges.
Once they are far enough along, I try to see if I can distill it down into a single word. The briefer you can describe it (or the story in general) the stronger it is, I feel. Again, it's not intentional, but it does generally emerge at some point, and I can try to focus in on it more, develop it and turn it into an overarching thing that carries through all of the characters' arcs.
To me, at least, for November, it was 'identity'. For Fires it was 'truth'. Mirrors 'consequences'. I know what Book IV's is, but I won't talk about that here, you deserve to find it for yourself when it comes out. My WIP standalone I'm working on right now is a bit trickier, since it's more focused on the romance. 'Love conquers all' is the usual answer for romances, but that's three words. Maybe I can make an exception there.
Are these definitive? Not at all. It's likely you'll find something in my books that I haven't even thought about, bringing your own background and perspectives that I simply don't have. So please don't think you have to agree with me. The more people that discover my work, the more interpretations there are, and I am always curious to see what they are. It's the nature of art!
I hope you are all safe and well in these difficult times. Be nice to each other, and take care.
Once they are far enough along, I try to see if I can distill it down into a single word. The briefer you can describe it (or the story in general) the stronger it is, I feel. Again, it's not intentional, but it does generally emerge at some point, and I can try to focus in on it more, develop it and turn it into an overarching thing that carries through all of the characters' arcs.
To me, at least, for November, it was 'identity'. For Fires it was 'truth'. Mirrors 'consequences'. I know what Book IV's is, but I won't talk about that here, you deserve to find it for yourself when it comes out. My WIP standalone I'm working on right now is a bit trickier, since it's more focused on the romance. 'Love conquers all' is the usual answer for romances, but that's three words. Maybe I can make an exception there.
Are these definitive? Not at all. It's likely you'll find something in my books that I haven't even thought about, bringing your own background and perspectives that I simply don't have. So please don't think you have to agree with me. The more people that discover my work, the more interpretations there are, and I am always curious to see what they are. It's the nature of art!
I hope you are all safe and well in these difficult times. Be nice to each other, and take care.
March 28, 2020
Whence Cometh Hope?
It's been a long time since my last 'real' post, and I wanted this one to be more meaningful than updating my current projects or a bit of writing advice that I gleaned through my work this past week.
One of the themes of the From the Ashes of Victory series is finding hope and the strength to pursue it out of the sucking morass of darkness that many of the characters find themselves in when we join them. There is a lot of darkness in these books, and they are set in a dark time, post-WWI, pre-suffrage, the Russian revolution, etc. Victoria's arc especially is about her finding her way back into the light after so long in pitch-blackness.
Where do they find the hope to keep going? The strength to move on and rebuild lives shattered by events totally outside their control?
Each other.
Trying to go it alone is a common mistake shared by many of my characters, and it's only through (often reluctantly) working together and sharing their burdens that they grow into the strong, vivacious people eager to change the world for the better that they were always meant to be. They all have access to extraordinary abilities, the most potent magic known in their world, but it's only one tool of many to help them in their recoveries. No matter how powerful they may be, without each other they would be just as vulnerable to their traumas as they were before they were transformed.
Togetherness, the bonds of found family and sisterhood, of learning from the experiences of others and embracing them, the power of vulnerability and trust, these are many of the ways in which our heroines find and tap the extraordinary potential within themselves.
Hatred, violence, selfishness and fear is what broke them down, but it's love, of each other and themselves, that allows them to take the next step, to seek the light in the dark. Romantic, platonic, familial; no matter the form, love is the underlying, driving force in a series cloaked in darkness and despair.
EVE is made of survivors, but through one another and working together, they become far more than that. They flourish through adversity because they seek out and embrace others like them, who have been through just as much, if not more than they have. It's painful, humiliating and humbling, but ultimately all for the betterment of each of them together.
I think there are those out there who could use a story of overcoming dark times, and finding hope in the most trying of times, so I hope, if you are reading this, that you will give them a chance, and maybe find a little bit of that hope yourself through them.
"EVE was about new beginnings, about finding a new home. It was the bed of ashes from which the detritus left behind in the wake of an uncaring world could grow again. The lost, the broken, the discarded, the forgotten.
Together, they were no longer any of those things."
-excerpt from The Fires of Winter
One of the themes of the From the Ashes of Victory series is finding hope and the strength to pursue it out of the sucking morass of darkness that many of the characters find themselves in when we join them. There is a lot of darkness in these books, and they are set in a dark time, post-WWI, pre-suffrage, the Russian revolution, etc. Victoria's arc especially is about her finding her way back into the light after so long in pitch-blackness.
Where do they find the hope to keep going? The strength to move on and rebuild lives shattered by events totally outside their control?
Each other.
Trying to go it alone is a common mistake shared by many of my characters, and it's only through (often reluctantly) working together and sharing their burdens that they grow into the strong, vivacious people eager to change the world for the better that they were always meant to be. They all have access to extraordinary abilities, the most potent magic known in their world, but it's only one tool of many to help them in their recoveries. No matter how powerful they may be, without each other they would be just as vulnerable to their traumas as they were before they were transformed.
Togetherness, the bonds of found family and sisterhood, of learning from the experiences of others and embracing them, the power of vulnerability and trust, these are many of the ways in which our heroines find and tap the extraordinary potential within themselves.
Hatred, violence, selfishness and fear is what broke them down, but it's love, of each other and themselves, that allows them to take the next step, to seek the light in the dark. Romantic, platonic, familial; no matter the form, love is the underlying, driving force in a series cloaked in darkness and despair.
EVE is made of survivors, but through one another and working together, they become far more than that. They flourish through adversity because they seek out and embrace others like them, who have been through just as much, if not more than they have. It's painful, humiliating and humbling, but ultimately all for the betterment of each of them together.
I think there are those out there who could use a story of overcoming dark times, and finding hope in the most trying of times, so I hope, if you are reading this, that you will give them a chance, and maybe find a little bit of that hope yourself through them.
"EVE was about new beginnings, about finding a new home. It was the bed of ashes from which the detritus left behind in the wake of an uncaring world could grow again. The lost, the broken, the discarded, the forgotten.
Together, they were no longer any of those things."
-excerpt from The Fires of Winter
March 20, 2020
All Books Discounted!
I am joining many of my fellow lesfic authors in discounting all of my books to (the equivalent of) 99 cents for the foreseeable future, effective today! Yes, you too Canada and Australia! I didn't forget you. You get my books for $.99, as well.
They are also all in Kindle Unlimited, and the novels are quite long, so I hope you will spend some of your time with my characters in the From the Ashes of Victory series as they work together through dark times to find hope and strength in once another. With lots of magic and some kissy bits, too!
They are also all in Kindle Unlimited, and the novels are quite long, so I hope you will spend some of your time with my characters in the From the Ashes of Victory series as they work together through dark times to find hope and strength in once another. With lots of magic and some kissy bits, too!
What a Time to Come Back
I haven't been ignoring this place! Promise! Things came up that took precedence over anything to do with writing, keeping me away from here and my keyboard since my last post. But I'm here now, just in time for the rest of the world to go haywire.
I won't say what's kept me away, but I will say that I will do my utmost to be back here now that I can be, and hopefully provide some respite or outlet for anyone who comes across me and needs it.
I am still sticking to my vow to not talk about works in progress until there is something concrete to say, but I will once again start giving my insights into the creative process and dropping bits of insight that I've learned in my quest to re-build what has atrophied over the last months, and year since Hall of Mirrors came out. Suffice it to say I am getting back to work on my unfinished works, and will have more specifics when I have specifics to give! Everything has been on pause since I was last here, so I can't give you the lift of progress, but I wanted to let you know that I haven't disappeared. I am here, and so very eager to get back to work and share with you.
We're all in this together, and I will do my part to make this microscopic corner of the world interesting for you, at the very least.
In dark times, I have managed to cling to my little light, and I hope that I can help brighten yours in some way, starting with my next post.
Stay safe.
I won't say what's kept me away, but I will say that I will do my utmost to be back here now that I can be, and hopefully provide some respite or outlet for anyone who comes across me and needs it.
I am still sticking to my vow to not talk about works in progress until there is something concrete to say, but I will once again start giving my insights into the creative process and dropping bits of insight that I've learned in my quest to re-build what has atrophied over the last months, and year since Hall of Mirrors came out. Suffice it to say I am getting back to work on my unfinished works, and will have more specifics when I have specifics to give! Everything has been on pause since I was last here, so I can't give you the lift of progress, but I wanted to let you know that I haven't disappeared. I am here, and so very eager to get back to work and share with you.
We're all in this together, and I will do my part to make this microscopic corner of the world interesting for you, at the very least.
In dark times, I have managed to cling to my little light, and I hope that I can help brighten yours in some way, starting with my next post.
Stay safe.
January 23, 2020
No More Paperbacks (For Now)
I've chosen to suspend the sales of the paperback versions of my books for the moment. They will be back up when I can afford to have them professionally edited and formatted. Right now, they're passable, but not something that I am well and truly proud of, especially given that once they're printed, they're that way forever. I'm not a perfectionist, but sometimes 'good enough' could stand to be a little better before you throw daylight at it.
This is all part of my 2020 attempt to be better and more effective with my time and effort after such a dispiriting 2019, which includes re-evaluating things that are already done. Vague, yes, and maybe not worth a post all by itself, but hope springs eternal!
Optimism ahoy!
This is all part of my 2020 attempt to be better and more effective with my time and effort after such a dispiriting 2019, which includes re-evaluating things that are already done. Vague, yes, and maybe not worth a post all by itself, but hope springs eternal!
Optimism ahoy!
January 16, 2020
Huzzah!
Getting any kind of feedback on my books is always surreal. Those characters, the world they inhabit, all of it comes out of my head, and feels like that's the only place it really exists. Having scenes or characters that I made up come back at me from other people is still really weird.
But for one of my books to make a reviewers top ten list for the year is the best, and most surreal thing that has happened to me yet!
Remember, November made Michelle Blakey's list of ten best books for 2019 over on The Lesbian Review, and I am still stunned. Not only are my stories real to others, but they really like them! It's right there alongside real books written by real authors! It's enormously validating, and I am still over the moon at seeing it there. Thank you so much!
Please also check out the work by the other others on the list, who worked just as hard as I did (probably harder). I don't see us as competitors, but colleagues, and their work deserves every bit of the recognition and support mine does.
Off to make more!
Michelle's top ten list: https://www.thelesbianreview.com/mich...
But for one of my books to make a reviewers top ten list for the year is the best, and most surreal thing that has happened to me yet!
Remember, November made Michelle Blakey's list of ten best books for 2019 over on The Lesbian Review, and I am still stunned. Not only are my stories real to others, but they really like them! It's right there alongside real books written by real authors! It's enormously validating, and I am still over the moon at seeing it there. Thank you so much!
Please also check out the work by the other others on the list, who worked just as hard as I did (probably harder). I don't see us as competitors, but colleagues, and their work deserves every bit of the recognition and support mine does.
Off to make more!
Michelle's top ten list: https://www.thelesbianreview.com/mich...
January 10, 2020
2020
I'm not one for resolutions, but I've given some thought to what I'd like to do this year, and things I'd like to change. I had planned to start this year with a big post about the status of Book IV and the other goings-on in my head, but I've decided against doing that, and it ties in to the changes I will be making for myself.
The biggest is that I'm not going to do updates on works in progress anymore. I thought they would be motivating, but my experiment with making my progress public has actually had the opposite effect.
When I was writing Remember, November, I didn't tell anybody what it was until I sent it off to beta, and keeping that burning need to finish it so I could tell people about it was, in hindsight, way more motivating than releasing that tension bit by bit in the form of explanations or teases. It's a phenomenon I knew about through listening to other artists talk about their processes, but along the way of putting out more books, I forgot about it. In the desire to play to algorithms and follow what I 'should' do to be successful, creatively I feel less so, and I really don't like the feeling. I have never felt comfortable teasing stuff that isn't finished, and looking back over the last year, I should have trusted that feeling. I need to keep everything bottled up and channeled into the work, not twisting random release valves in the hopes something catches fire.
So from now on, I won't be giving any status updates or referring to works in progress until the blurbs and covers are done and the manuscript is undergoing final polishing before being published. My last post from last year will be the last thing I say about them until they're ready. If you enjoyed the little updates I gave, I'm sorry to take them away, but this is something I need to do for myself.
In that spirit, I really don't want to talk about other things that I'm doing, or what I want to do; that just spoils my motivation for those, as well. Talking about things out loud, putting them in some kind of public record to keep me honest or whatever doesn't work, and never has. I've been trying to fill the hole of lack of releases by putting out something, even if it's just to say that I'm doing the work, and it's just... counterproductive. I've been following, doing what others have said to do, taken advice I shouldn't have from people I had no real reason to listen to other than they are where I want to be, but those people aren't me, and we all work differently. This is me working out what does for me, even if it's been two years since my first book came out.
I wrote that book in the dark, and it is still the most fulfilling one I've written. I've learned a bit about myself and some of the problems I've had gaining traction in getting noticed, but the simple fact is that I'm not getting books out as quickly as I would like. A lot went wrong last year, but some things went right! I will try to learn from the mistakes, and build on the successes, even if I'm the only one who knows about them at the moment.
In short, leaking less here will hopefully make both me and my books better, and I hope you'll agree that the end results are worth it.
If you haven't chosen to follow me here, or to use the 'Follow Author' button on my Amazon page, which can be found here: https://www.amazon.com/Cameron-Darrow..., then please do so, and be notified when my books become available automatically. Without teases, they'll just show up one day! Christmas in... whenever. It's a surprise!
Until then, I have a lot of work to catch up on.
Thank you always for your support and your patience.
The biggest is that I'm not going to do updates on works in progress anymore. I thought they would be motivating, but my experiment with making my progress public has actually had the opposite effect.
When I was writing Remember, November, I didn't tell anybody what it was until I sent it off to beta, and keeping that burning need to finish it so I could tell people about it was, in hindsight, way more motivating than releasing that tension bit by bit in the form of explanations or teases. It's a phenomenon I knew about through listening to other artists talk about their processes, but along the way of putting out more books, I forgot about it. In the desire to play to algorithms and follow what I 'should' do to be successful, creatively I feel less so, and I really don't like the feeling. I have never felt comfortable teasing stuff that isn't finished, and looking back over the last year, I should have trusted that feeling. I need to keep everything bottled up and channeled into the work, not twisting random release valves in the hopes something catches fire.
So from now on, I won't be giving any status updates or referring to works in progress until the blurbs and covers are done and the manuscript is undergoing final polishing before being published. My last post from last year will be the last thing I say about them until they're ready. If you enjoyed the little updates I gave, I'm sorry to take them away, but this is something I need to do for myself.
In that spirit, I really don't want to talk about other things that I'm doing, or what I want to do; that just spoils my motivation for those, as well. Talking about things out loud, putting them in some kind of public record to keep me honest or whatever doesn't work, and never has. I've been trying to fill the hole of lack of releases by putting out something, even if it's just to say that I'm doing the work, and it's just... counterproductive. I've been following, doing what others have said to do, taken advice I shouldn't have from people I had no real reason to listen to other than they are where I want to be, but those people aren't me, and we all work differently. This is me working out what does for me, even if it's been two years since my first book came out.
I wrote that book in the dark, and it is still the most fulfilling one I've written. I've learned a bit about myself and some of the problems I've had gaining traction in getting noticed, but the simple fact is that I'm not getting books out as quickly as I would like. A lot went wrong last year, but some things went right! I will try to learn from the mistakes, and build on the successes, even if I'm the only one who knows about them at the moment.
In short, leaking less here will hopefully make both me and my books better, and I hope you'll agree that the end results are worth it.
If you haven't chosen to follow me here, or to use the 'Follow Author' button on my Amazon page, which can be found here: https://www.amazon.com/Cameron-Darrow..., then please do so, and be notified when my books become available automatically. Without teases, they'll just show up one day! Christmas in... whenever. It's a surprise!
Until then, I have a lot of work to catch up on.
Thank you always for your support and your patience.
December 26, 2019
Thank You 2019
If you're reading this, thank you. Thank you for reading my books, thank you for your reviews, your tweets, your mentioning of my name to people who might like my books, all the things that you have done this year to help make it my most successful one yet.
And thank you for your patience.
I didn't get done what I wanted to this year, but that just means there's a higher likelihood it gets done next year, right? That's how it works, I'm pretty sure. I had imagined this year was going to be a breakout one for me, and in some ways it was. I sold more books and got more reviews (and exposure) than in any other since I started writing books, and that is something I am very happy about. Slowly but surely, people are learning who I am, and that feels good. I am grateful for all of it, and lucky to have even that much. And for that, I owe all of you for reading reviewing and sharing my work.
I only published one book this year, which is frustrating, but, I wrote two, which is great. They just aren't ready for you yet. I hate to speculate, but this is the season for optimism more than any other, so I will share with you that I hope to have three out next year. That's the goal. If it doesn't happen, then that will make this post next year awkward, but I am aiming high for 2020.
As for the books themselves:
What's happening with Book IV is a post all by itself, so I won't go into it here, other than to say I'm working on it.
My experience with writing "HCH" has been hugely positive for me; writing a standalone book in a fraction of the time of the Ashes books is a shot of confidence I needed, and that book is coming along nicely. It's in its second draft now, and will be out before Book IV, hopefully in the spring, but we'll see how much I get done on it in the next week or so. It's in a much better place than it was even two weeks ago, and I am very much looking forward to sharing it with you.
The third planned book for next year is something else entirely. My first first-person POV, superhero-inspired, with lots of snark and magic (and swears); not very far along yet, but it's already been a hoot spending time in the MC's head. She's so different from my other POV characters, it will stretch me to write her and I am so looking forward to it. But, that's still in the early stages, so that's really all I can say about it at the moment. But it's in the works.
So that's where I am right now, thank you for reading this far. I truly am grateful for each and every one of you. I will do my best next year to give you even more to read, more characters to love and more worlds to get lost in, and maybe some clever wordsmithing if you don't like those other parts.
No post next week, taking some time off, so have a happy New Year, and I wish to you all the best.
Thank you again.
And thank you for your patience.
I didn't get done what I wanted to this year, but that just means there's a higher likelihood it gets done next year, right? That's how it works, I'm pretty sure. I had imagined this year was going to be a breakout one for me, and in some ways it was. I sold more books and got more reviews (and exposure) than in any other since I started writing books, and that is something I am very happy about. Slowly but surely, people are learning who I am, and that feels good. I am grateful for all of it, and lucky to have even that much. And for that, I owe all of you for reading reviewing and sharing my work.
I only published one book this year, which is frustrating, but, I wrote two, which is great. They just aren't ready for you yet. I hate to speculate, but this is the season for optimism more than any other, so I will share with you that I hope to have three out next year. That's the goal. If it doesn't happen, then that will make this post next year awkward, but I am aiming high for 2020.
As for the books themselves:
What's happening with Book IV is a post all by itself, so I won't go into it here, other than to say I'm working on it.
My experience with writing "HCH" has been hugely positive for me; writing a standalone book in a fraction of the time of the Ashes books is a shot of confidence I needed, and that book is coming along nicely. It's in its second draft now, and will be out before Book IV, hopefully in the spring, but we'll see how much I get done on it in the next week or so. It's in a much better place than it was even two weeks ago, and I am very much looking forward to sharing it with you.
The third planned book for next year is something else entirely. My first first-person POV, superhero-inspired, with lots of snark and magic (and swears); not very far along yet, but it's already been a hoot spending time in the MC's head. She's so different from my other POV characters, it will stretch me to write her and I am so looking forward to it. But, that's still in the early stages, so that's really all I can say about it at the moment. But it's in the works.
So that's where I am right now, thank you for reading this far. I truly am grateful for each and every one of you. I will do my best next year to give you even more to read, more characters to love and more worlds to get lost in, and maybe some clever wordsmithing if you don't like those other parts.
No post next week, taking some time off, so have a happy New Year, and I wish to you all the best.
Thank you again.
December 19, 2019
Reversal
From uncooperative to spilling all the secrets, this week was completely the opposite of last week. I feel better about HCH than I have in a while, and it feels like it's coming together better than ever. It has a much more defined shape now, and I've been able to make some connections that have been missing.
It included one of those days that will have me chasing the dragon for a while; a day where everything clicked. The words flowed, my characters were singing to me and I had all the ideas. It was great! The kind of days writers are always hoping they'd have. You wish every day was like that, but knowing they won't be, it's always reassuring and confidence-boosting to know that you can still have them. A nice little lift into the end of the year!
It included one of those days that will have me chasing the dragon for a while; a day where everything clicked. The words flowed, my characters were singing to me and I had all the ideas. It was great! The kind of days writers are always hoping they'd have. You wish every day was like that, but knowing they won't be, it's always reassuring and confidence-boosting to know that you can still have them. A nice little lift into the end of the year!
