Stephanie Wild's Blog, page 3

Grace and Aziz: a Parable for our Time

Recently, I had a conversation with a friend of mine, Meredith Holley. She's a trial attorney for women bringing sexual assault claims and a coach to those who hope to avoid them. We talked about Aziz and Grace and what they are teaching us about men, women, gender, sexuality, sexual harm, and forgiveness.

I made a few short videos for you from the hour we talked. I hope you enjoy them.

I'd love to hear your thoughts. 

Give us some room to want you

Some men have been asking whether the women they know have gone through anything like what happened between "Grace" and Aziz Ansari. (Thank you for asking.)

Hell YES.

It happens all the time. 

Some men have been asking if it really happens all the time; if it's really so severe; if it can possibly be that bad. (Thank you for asking.)

Yes. It's that bad. It's like we are fish swimming in it. It's maddening and heart breaking and soul crushing. 

Some men have been asking what they are supposed to learn from this. (Thank you for asking.)

You are supposed to learn that we are exhausted from defending ourselves. 

You are supposed to learn not to push but to invite.

Just give us some goddamned room to want you; to desire you; to ask you to fuck us. And if you do that already, please teach your friends and enemies.

Do you like us? Do you love us? Do you want to fuck us? Then stop. Look. Listen. Smell. Breathe. Invite. We are coming. 

Here's a story that ended differently. {explicit}