Lilian Nattel's Blog, page 85
October 25, 2010
*Monday Oct 25/10–Reunion
Arboretum, University of Guelph, click to enlarge
Last weekend, at the height of the turning of the leaves, we had our 2010 reunion of our first trip to China. The children are on the cusp of adolescence; they exchanged email addresses. They and their siblings are growing up and we, the parents (between buying skinny jeans and making lunches) know how privileged we are. We greet each other's children, marvel at their beauty inside and out, we get teary, we tell stories, we laugh, we plan to meet here again next year.
Filed under: A Monday Moment, Adoption, My Life Tagged: Adoption from China
October 22, 2010
*Around the World In Pictures
Around the World in Eighty Days – What would Phileas Fogg and Passepartout have seen? is a photo exhibit of late 19th century pictures. Here's one example:
Country kids in Japan, 1898, by T. Enami, a Japanese photographer
h/t Bouphonia And to remind anyone who may have forgotten or who is new to this blog, Phila of Bouphonia posts hopeful (and interesting) news every Friday.
Filed under: Uncategorized
October 21, 2010
*The Great Failure
This is the title of a book by Natalie Goldberg that I recently picked up at the libary, attracted by the title, and thinking it would be full of inspirational tales along the lines of Edison, who produced 10,000 crappy light bulbs before inventing the one that worked.
Natalie Goldberg is at her best as a teacher of both writing and zen and of writing as a spiritual discipline and practice. I first encountered her books around 20 years ago. Writing Down the Bones was all the rage in writing groups and of course, being contrary, I avoided it for a few years and then read both that one and Wild Mind (basically a re-run of Bones, but enjoyable). I found them invigorating, and loved the spiritual aspect, though her favourite methods didn't work for me.
The Great Failure, however, isn't about writing nor is it about failure as a path to success. It's a memoir about the two important men in her life and their failure to maintain appropriate boundaries, resulting in abuse of their positions, one as father, the other as teacher. It's a divided book, not only in its subject matter, but in the success of the portraits.
Her portrait of her father is nuanced and vivid. He was, as one would say in Yiddish, "a grober yung," a boor (literally "a gross boy"). He had little boyhood himself, and was little cared for. As a man he was crass and oblivious to his crassness. He commented on his pubescent daughter's body, he held her too tight, he made her uncomfortable enough to avoid being alone with him. A bartender, he had no understanding of his adult daughter's career as a Buddhist teacher, but he was earthy and without pretension.
During a visit to her home in the southwest, he sat outside to watch the sunrise at her command. When she asked him what he thought of it, he was nonplussed; it was a sunrise, it happens every morning. On another occasion she tried to teach her parents to meditate. After ten minutes of silence, she asked him if he'd noticed how busy the mind was, how many thoughts flit through it. He said he hadn't thought at all, not a single thought. What was it like for him, she asked. It was like it always is when nobody is talking or doing anything, he said.
He was loud, he was busy, he was vigorous, he was insulting, a grober yung who loved his daughter with all his heart. His simplicity, his complexity, and her forgiveness for all of it comes through vividly.
It stays with me. And I envy her this possibility of forgiveness because, although her father failed in many ways it was out of ignorance, not intention, and there is all the difference in that.
Her portrayal of her teacher, Katagiri Roshi, a zen master and founding abbot of the Minnesota Zen Meditation Center, while sincere lacks the vibrancy and understanding she has for her father. Katagiri's motivations and feelings in carrying on secret affairs with students are unknowns that Goldberg tries to fill in with guesswork. Her guesses are sometimes plausible and sometimes, for me, dubious. And the situation is different in another way; he was her teacher not ever her lover. The wounds are wounds of disillusion, and as disappointing as the disillusion is, it is a surface wound compared to what she experienced as a daughter.
Perhaps better writing comes out of deeper wounds. I wonder what, as a teacher herself, she would say about that.
Filed under: Literature Tagged: Dainin Katagiri, Natalie Goldberg, The Great Failure
October 19, 2010
*Purple Revolution
Calgary, which has a reputation of being a conservative city, home to oil and stampedes, has elected an accomplished intelligent man, a Harvard graduate, who is also Muslim and a visible minority. The new mayor, Naheed Nanshi, won 40% of the popular vote. It was a surprise victory–the front runners both being conservative candidates. He called his campaign the purple revolution. Good choice of colours!
Rob Anders, the Conservative MP for Calgary West, calls Mr. Nenshi the "Obama of Alberta," and he doesn't mean that in a good way
I say Kudos to Calgary and Kudos to Calgary's voters.
Our own municipal election here in Toronto is next week. The view started out grim, but it's looking up. I hope that we pull one out of the fire for the centre, too.
Filed under: Politics & Economy Tagged: Naheed Nanshi
October 18, 2010
*Monday Oct 18/10
lovely camel (explored), originally uploaded by Waleed Almunayes «KWS».
Is this camel smiling?
Filed under: A Monday Moment, Art & Photography, Nature & Science Tagged: camel
October 12, 2010
*Booker Prize
The Finkler Question has won the Booker. The author, Howard Jacobson, age 68, was born in Manchester. He is the author of 10 previous novels and an old hand at not winning. I'm cheering for him now.
From the NYT:
He accepted the award to unusually enthusiastic and sustained applause at an awards ceremony in London.
"I'm speechless," he told the audience. "Fortunately, I prepared one earlier. It's dated 1983. That's how long the wait's been."
The Booker is given each year to a novel by an author in Britain, Ireland or one of the Commonwealth nations. The prize comes with a check for £50,000, or about $80,000, and a practically guaranteed jump in book sales and publicity.
It tells the story of two old friends, a BBC producer and a philosopher, who meet their former teacher for dinner. On the way home, one of them is robbed, which sets him on a comic journey of discovery about what it means to be Jewish.
I remember being told (in 2003) that "Jewish stories don't sell in Britain." I imagine this one is. Congratulations Mr. Jacobson. You give us all hope.
h/t Bookninja
Filed under: Literature Tagged: The Finkler Question
October 10, 2010
*Monday Oct 11/10
Nibble your cheek?, originally uploaded by Scott Grant.
Filed under: A Monday Moment, Art & Photography, Nature & Science Tagged: puffins
October 9, 2010
October 6, 2010
*Bowing My Head
I am probably going to be silent here for a while. I am terribly sad although thank God my sadness is not over any damage to anyone I love, and I am also, as far as I know, touch wood, and blow away the evil eye, healthy.
But after eight years of work, my novel hasn't found a home yet. My agent and his team love it and are behind it a 100%. Still. And they will proceed with it again. However, I am, in the meantime, on a tight budget, having devoted those eight years to writing it and to my young kids.
I wonder if I was mistaken to be so faithful to this story and to revise and revise and revise. I wonder if I have lost my touch. I wonder if I should have just moved on. And while I'm wondering and my heart is heavy, I am still trying to make it just a little bit better.
Filed under: My Life Tagged: disappintment
October 4, 2010
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