Sarah MacLean's Blog, page 14

In Which I Realize Birth Order Matters

In the immortal words of the Dowager Duchess of Leighton, Harumph.

As I mentioned earlier this week, Eric, Baxter and I  are currently earning bonus points by fostering my parents' dog for a few weeks while the spy and the jetsetting Italian vacation in lush, lovely climes. Suburban Dog is becoming more and more used to his urban jungle safari, but there are some lessons I'm learning–in particular, that twelve-year-old long-haired dachshunds procured just as parental units were attempting to manage empty nest syndrome, do not make for the most easy of houseguests. Indeed, they make for rather high maintenance houseguests.

I present to you, Suburban Dog's guide to visiting human siblings in New York City.

Rule 1: Do not allow anything to alter the schedule you have in suburbia. This includes, but is not limited to:

* Waking up at 5:45am even though human sibling hasn't seen that side of 6am in close to a decade.

* Baby carrots and/or fennel at 1:30pm even though human sibling usually doesn't remember to eat her own lunch until 3 or 4pm

* Goldfish at 6:00pm even though human sibling does not ascribe to "drink time" when "the local news is on."

* Your being crated when you think you should not be, even if no one is in the house.

Rule 1, Subset a: If anything does alter the schedule you have in suburbia, consider one of the following actions:

* Barking like an insane person dog until schedule resumes.

* Whining and sighing until the air around human sibling smells sufficiently foul that she actually wants to leave the bed/you and get you carrots/goldfish.

* Approaching human sibling and urinate, preferably on her foot. NB: This is the fastest way to get human sibling to pay attention, but she will not reward you with carrots/goldfish. She will, however, take you outside.

Rule 2: In regards to other dogs in the household, humping them makes for good fun.

Rule 2, Subset a: This goes double if they're asleep.

Rule 2, Subset b: If other dogs are humped for too long at 6am, you may be growled and/or barked at. But then the other dog is awake! Celebration! Time for squeaky toy!

Rule 2, Subset c: Squeaky toys also wake humans, but it's not as good as it sounds. When squeaking, beware flying pillows.

Rule 3: When outside, if you have the opportunity to run away from human sibling, do so.

Rule 3, Subset a: The urban landscape is filled with food. It's often available inside open doorways. Enter strange doorways at whim in search of food.

Rule 3, Subset b: Beware. Running toward the street will inspire human sibling to run after you, yelling your name. Do not stop. Do not look back. You are almost free.

Rule 3, Subset c: When human sibling catches you, she will use strange "New York-style" dog training techniques on you to attempt to prove her evolutionary superiority. She will pronounce, "I have opposable thumbs! I will always win!" NB: She's the one picking up your poop. Who's the winner now?

Rule 4: When in doubt, bark.

Rule 4, Subset a: If a solution does not present itself, bark more.

Rule 4, Subset b: If still no solution, attempt to get larger, dumber dog to get human's attention by barking at him and/or humping his leg.

Rule 4, Subset c: If the human addresses your issue, but not in a manner timely enough for your taste, be sure to show your displeasure by barking a final time, preferably while staring said human down despite your Napoleonic stature.

I'm ashamed to say that all of this has happened. Particularly Rule 3, Subset c, which I'm terribly embarrassed about, considering that when I looked up from my excited utterance, three of my neighbors were staring at me like I was a crazy person.

The truth is, I now understand why my sister was so damn mean to annoyed at me when I was growing up. You see…I was the youngest child. And so I could do very little wrong in the eyes of my parents, who (metaphorically) fed me fennel and goldfish and allowed me to (i hope only metaphorically) pee on my sister's feet when I wanted something.

I'm sorry, Kiki.

But you'd still better come get this dog in 8 days for his trip to your house.

I'm not that sorry.

Leanna Renee Hieber's Eleven Prequel Musts

Today, I'm turning the blog over to my friend, the fabulous Leanna Renee Hieber! Leanna is the author of Strangely Beautiful series and one of the co-founders of Lady Jane's Salon, New York City's wonderful monthly romance reading series. Speaking of Lady Jane's…if you're going to be in town at the end of June for RWA Nationals, please join us on Monday, June 27th, for a special RWA Lady Jane's! Leanna and I will be reading along with Eloisa James, Carrie Lofty & Dianna Love! The reading starts at 7pm at Madame X at 94 W. Houston. I recommend getting there early because I'm betting it will be packed!

Welcome, Leanna!

I'm so thrilled to be back here with one of my favourite authors, thanks so much for allowing me to be here! I am so excited for Eleven, Miss Sarah, I can hardly stand it.

I'm just coming off the release of the most recent installment in my Strangely Beautiful series, The Perilous Prophecy of Guard and Goddess, where  we see the back-story of absolutely everything that comes to pass in The Strangely Beautiful Tale of Miss Percy Parker and – but don't worry, it's not full only of things we know or inside jokes, I reveal all sorts of things that the characters themselves couldn't have expected. Even the divine ones. All in my ghostly, Gothic Victorian Fantasy style with tons of longing, passion and ghost-busting. Don't worry if you haven't started the series yet, you could start with this one and move into books 1 and 2. (As I've been told it makes existing fans of the series want to re-read books 1 and 2 anyway!)

From the cover:

The Goddess: In the beginning, there were lovers: a winged deity of power and light, and a queen of grace and beauty. Phoenix was murdered, his beloved stolen away to the Whisper-world. But their passion inspired the Muses. Through great sacrifice, it could live again.

The Guard: There are always six, mortal hosts for the divine. Battling spirits through the ages, they defy Darkness, Lord of the Dead. In 1867, a shadow rises. The tide turns against them, and all hope falls on a child of prophecy, an eerie, snow-white girl yet to be born. But her path must be cleared. A Great War is coming, and song, wind and stars whisper that the eighteen-year-old Beatrice Smith must give everything to prepare.

So here are my eleven prequel Musts. This is not Leanna's 'how to write a prequel' – but instead, these are eleven random things this Strangely Beautiful prequel absolutely had to have.

11. More ghosts in more cities! Beyond London! We begin this novel in Cairo, Egypt, in 1867. Ghost-busting at the Pyramids!

10. An insider's view: What it's like to be chosen for The Grand Work of The Guard and possessed by Phoenix Fire and The Muses. It isn't always pretty but it sure as hell is one fantastical ride.

9. All kinds of juicy little fun tidbits are planted here that play out and weave into the rest of my books. Like finding Easter eggs!

8. First kisses!

7. Divinity smackdown: A Gorgon vs. Persephone GIRL FIGHT!

6. Meeting Iris Parker, Percy's mother. She's a small cameo role in the series but she is HUGE in my heart. One of my very favourite characters.

5. Humans drive gods to do amazing things, and make inspiring, heart-aching sacrifices.

4. The hero reads aloud from Elizabeth Gaskell's North and South, using it as a tool for seduction! Yum!

3. Epic young love. Epic divinity love. Epic love all around. Epic win.

2. A baby Miss Percy Parker! She's eerily cute!

1. More first kisses! Yes, dear reader, I shall take you to witness young Alexi Rychman's first kiss. A divine one at that. A young, brooding, brilliant and angsty Alexi Rychman with a goddess for a paramour. Double-yum!!

I hope you'll check out The Perilous Prophecy of Guard and Goddess and the Strangely Beautiful series, follow me on Twitter and Facebook so you can follow along on my Haunted London Blog tour full of ghost stories and giveaways – also, stay tuned for my upcoming YA series, it's a Gothic Victorian saga set in a 1880 New York City full of dark magic; Magic Most Foul, releasing 11/11 from

Thanks so much for coming over to play, Leanna!

For a chance to win The Perilous Prophecy of Guard and Goddess, please leave a comment telling us your favorite sequel OR prequel in film, literature, or other!

We'll choose one winner on Monday!

 

Design Features to Avoid on your Website

Today, I was thinking about splash pages for websites. You know the things I'm talking about, those static (or flash) intro pages that require an extra click to get to anywhere on the site that you might actually find something of interest. And I put my thought into the world with a simple tweet:

I don't like splash pages (which is what I meant by landing pages above). They're unnecessary and a waste of time, as far as I'm concerned. And I was happy to see that I am not alone. Sarah Wendell and Micol Ostow and others also dislike splash pages and want them to go away.

And then things started to get interesting. Because apparently people dislike a lot more than splash pages. And they want to be heard. So…here's a list of things you should think twice about before you add them to your website:

FLASH INTROS:

@bottledgoose - Flash intros are the frooits of the devyil. THankfully they are finally starting to go the way of the dodo thanks to iThings.

@ElyssaPapa – oh, god, hate Flash websites with the passion of a 1,000 suns.

@AnaFarrish – I don't like [splash pages], especially if they have flash or a movie, or something else I have to skip to get where I want to go.

@laurakcurtis - Oh, goodness yes…keep the flash away!!

@kdubtweeting - RE: Flash Intros. SO 2000′s. Everyone did Flash intros when they first came out. BORING –They are annoying!

AUTOMATIC MOVIES & MUSIC:

@amandahebert - weird background music that automatically starts playing.

@ElyssaPapa – automatic playing trailers.

@katelinnea – Hate any autoplaying sound or video.

@kierstenkrum – And music! RT @sarahmaclean: I also feel that way about flash intros. Fastest way to get me to leave your site.

NO SEARCH, NO STAY!

@katelinnea – Oh, oh, I also hate when sites don't have search boxes! And when it's difficult to navigate archived posts/articles!

SLIDE IN ADS (THE ONES THAT BLOCK TEXT)

@RonHogan – Ads that slide in over your content so you have to click them closed if you want to read anything.

@LaurieBLondon – Slide in ads are my biggest pet peeve! I usually click out of the website entirely and try never to go back.

HIDDEN TABS & BUTTONS

@margomaguire – Tabs that aren 't obvious.

@Gwenda – Buttons that are cleverly hidden until you mouseover. Navigation should be easy.

IMAGES OF TEXT:

@bottledgoose –  As someone who does this for a living nothing fills me with more rage than images of text rather than actual text. There is no excuse to have imaged text when these are readily available: http://www.google.com/webfonts

FRAMES & TABLES

@aislinn_mac –  as long as we're talking old-school… Frames!

@JenniferRNN - Table layouts! Please use CSS for layout.

ESPECIALLY FOR AUTHORS

@ElyssaPapa - no book descriptions. Just a list of book titles. (maybe a sort of what is missing?)

I'm happy to say, I don't think I have any of these things on my website. (*phew!*)

But here's your chance to vent! What are your web-based pet peeves?

The Blackwing Revises

In Which Suburban Dog Meets New York City

Ok. You all know we have Baxter.

When he came to us, he was a year and a half old and had spent most of his life in Virginia, first in a pound there and then on what I imagine to be a very large farm, where he had many trees and lots of space to run. He met us here:

And he got out of the car in which he was transported from idyllic countryside to urban jungle and, trembling like a leaf, crawled right into Eric's lap, only to stay there. Forever. I mean, we had to keep him. Aside from being adorable, he was also terrified. And we are not bad people. We are the kind of people who want the creatures of the Earth to be happy.

Never fear–six years later, Baxter is a bona fide (fido?) city dog. He understands intersections, he cares not a whit about horn honking, he's polite on the street with other dogs, he knows to curb himself (ie, do his business in the street, not on the sidewalk) and he has most of our neighborhood in the pad of his paw, including, but not limited to: the dry cleaner, the wine store (excellent choice!), the owner of the local coffee shop, a handsome stranger who lives on our block and likes to feed him banana on the fly (I don't know if he's available, but I'm working on it, single ladies), and Sky Deli.

Well, it's not exactly called Sky Deli. I'm not really sure what it's called. But it's the corner deli on our block, where I stop in the mornings to get my coffee for the morning dog walk. It's your typical NYC deli, fresh coffee, fresh bagels, soda, sandwiches and kitchen staples on the fly. It's owned by a fabulous, wonderful guy named Jeff who is–it would be an understatement to say–a dog lover. Jeff lords over his lunchmeat-fiefdom from behind the counter and is quick to welcome you with a "Hello, young lady!" or a "How's it going, big guy?" And I would be lying if I said I didn't love him just a little.

Especially because when he discovered that I was tying Baxter up outside the deli to wait for me every morning while I get my coffee. Now, when I do that, Jeff opens the window behind the counter, leans out, and has a conversation with Baxter. It goes something like this:

Jeff – "Hey good lookin'"

Baxter – Ears up. Looks at Jeff.

Jeff – "Yeah. You! I love ya! I love your face!"

Baxter – Sits. Like a good dog.

Jeff – "Just say the word and I'll close up the shop and we'll run away together."

Baxter – Tongue lolls.

Sarah – "Hi, Jeff."

Jeff – (to Sarah) "I'll be right with you, honey." (to Baxter) "Turkey or cheese today?"

Baxter – Stands up. Sits again.

Sarah – "Jeff, do you–?"

Jeff – "Hang on a minute, honey." Turns to meat slicer. Slices fresh deli meat. Returns to window. "Turkey!" Throws turkey out the window, across a NYC sidewalk, to Baxter, with absolutely no interest in the fact that people might be walking by. If they get hit by turkey, that's their problem. Turns back to Sarah. "What can I do for your, sweetheart?"

Baxter – Nomnomnom.

Now, looking at this from Baxter's perspective, there's only one logical explanation for meat flying out a window and onto, sometimes, his head. A magical corner deli run by a kind wizard, where food falls from the sky. Hence, Sky Deli.

This is all to say, strange things happen in city dogs' lives.

Now, we currently have a houseguest–my parents' dog, a longhaired miniature dachshund. And this dog…well, he's not exactly city dog. He's Suburban Dog. Suburban Dog has a yard, and rarely (if ever) walks on a leash. He does not care for the outdoors and, being 12, he also hates stairs. I remind you, we live in a third-floor walk-up, so this is a particular problem as one arm must be free at all times to carry Suburban Dog. Additionally, because it's 100 degrees in New York today, I'm terrified he's going to get heat stroke from all that fur and too much exercise so, yes. I carry him.

It bears mentioning that Suburban Dog is an empty nest dog, also, so when not eating dog food, he expects baby carrots, goldfish crackers and raw fennel as a snack. (Yes. You read that right.) Suburban dog does not understand city life. He never learned to walk on a leash, so he either runs as fast as his little (very little) legs can carry him, or he lags along behind in a state of complete confusion. I imagine him to be thinking: "Why am I on this thing? Where are we going? Why are we walking for fun? I'd rather not do this, honestly."

He also is adorable, and so he's used to getting much attention everywhere he goes in suburbia, because he's a novelty. In New York City, on the sidewalk, during morning commute, Suburban Dog is not a novelty. He's a dog going about his day. But he doesn't know this. So he approaches people and flips over onto his back as if to say, "Hello, Human! Wouldn't you like to pet my glossy, just groomed fur?" In New York City, people just step around him. This is confusing to Suburban Dog because his cuteness powers seem to be diminished here.

Suburban Dog is also afraid of lots of outdoor city things. He's afraid of exterior stairs, of darkness, of trash cans, and of people who surprise him by, say, coming around the corner.

This morning, we went to Sky Deli as usual, and Suburban Dog was tied up outside of somewhere for the very first time in his life. Baxter sat, staring at the closed window of the deli as though he could make turkey appear with his mind.

I went into the deli and Jeff popped up from behind the counter.

Jeff- "Where'd you get the other one?"

Sarah – "My parents, we're–"

Jeff (through now-open window) – "Hiya new one! You're so little!"

Suburban Dog- Stares at Baxter

Baxter- Sit. Stand. Sit. Stand.

Jeff- "Cheese today!"

Baxter- Ears up. Good dog.

Suburban Dog- Roams ground, foraging, with no interest in the human in the strange house.

Jeff - Throws cheese.

Baxter - Catches cheese in massive jaws.

Jeff – "Little one!" Throws more cheese. Hits Suburban Dog in the head.

Suburban Dog – Looks up, does not register food. (To be fair, it's not every day this happens.)

Baxter – Eats Suburban Dog's cheese.

Jeff - "Hey! Little one!" Throws more cheese. Hits Suburban Dog in the nose.

Suburban Dog – Light dawns. Eats cheese.

Jeff- "Come back tomorrow. He'll understand better then."

I'm beginning to think Sky Deli is a canine cult. Certainly, Baxter would follow Jeff blindly. But that's beside the point, really. The real finding here is that Suburban Dog just might decide he likes being Urban Dog. And then my parents will have to find their own Sky Deli.

Oh, who am I kidding? The dog eats fennel. He already *has* Sky Deli.

In Which Tessa Dare Postpones Her Guest Blog…

I'm so so thrilled to host the fabulous Tessa Dare on the blog today!!!

I'm a huge fan of hers, and I absolutely cannot wait for the launch of her Spindle Cove series…beginning in September with A NIGHT TO SURRENDER (out in September!)! As an aside, Tessa's also just plain awesome, and so I'm always happy to have her here! I had originally asked her to do Eleven Questions, but the mega creative brain that is Ms. Dare resisted the assignment…and turned it into something even better.

So, without further blathering…I present, Tessa Dare's Eleven Scandals to Start When Postponing a Guest Blog (and other titles that don't rhyme)

I feel sooo scandalous. I was supposed to write this blog for Sarah weeks ago. How did it come to this?

Scandal One: Procrastination.

Yeah, I procrastinate. A lot. Sometimes several times a day. Especially when it comes to blogs. I have updated my own blog about… 6.5 times in the past year. I have no excuse.

Scandal Two: Overconfidence.

But when our lovely and talented hostess Sarah kindly asked me to come guest blog in April, I excitedly said YES! Even though I secretly know I have this procrastination issue. (see confession the first.) I am always filled with good intentions!

Scandal Three: Indecision.

So unsuspecting Sarah sent me this fun list of eleven questions for the blog, and I promptly seized up with paralysis. Because they were all CHOICES. "Alpha or beta?" "Small town or big city?" Picture me weeping, wanting to just answer "Um..Er…Both, depending…I think!" to just about every one. (Unless one of the options is Darcy. Darcy wins everything. Q: Darcy or Wentworth? A: Darcy. Q: Darcy or chocolate? A: Darcy. Q: Darcy or…a brand new barouche!? A: Give me door number one, Monty.)

Scandal Four: Inherent suspicion of favorites.

This is a side note, really. But in my strange mind, I'm convinced any question resembling "What is your favorite ____?" is just sticky with the devil's fingerprints. Why must I choose? No really, why??? I think I fear karmic backlash. Like, if I declare to the internet that my favorite meal is sushi and coconut milk, I'll find myself shipwrecked on a desert island next week. "Good news! You get your favorite meal EVERY DAY!" (I am, however, willing to risk being shipwrecked with Darcy. See point four.)

Scandal Five: Forgetfulness.

It's really cool how this trick works. It's almost effortless. If you've procrastinated in the proper way, diligently, after just a few weeks—poof! You suddenly just forget! It's almost like you never agreed to do it! Except…

Scandal Six: Contrition.

I did agree to do it. And when Sarah wrote to gently remind me, I of course profusely apologized for my lameness. But then I only made matters worse with…

Scandal Seven: Prevarication.

In my repentance, I may have offered to do a special blog giveaway—of a puppy, or a kidney. I must confess, I had no real intention of giving away either. Oh, the shame is piling deep…

Scandal Eight: More Procrastination.

I waited yet a few more days…

Scandal Nine: Lust.

And then last night, when I thought to myself, "I should sit down and write that blog for Sarah now." I realized it was after midnight, and therefore zomg! release day, and I decided to download Eleven Scandals first. Because by now, after hearing from what seemed like everyone else on the planet how wonderful it is, I was practically drooling for it. Could. Not. Wait.

Scandal Ten: Greed.

And you can guess what I did next. Read.

Scandal Eleven: There isn't one, because I'm still reading. And I'm up to the point where they've made out in the park, and SHHHHH. Nobody better talk to me.

Except that I'm sure Sarah will post this long after I've finished, so now we can talk! Wasn't it GREAT??

And I will give away…. Um, a book and coverflat? They are way prettier than a kidney! And come perfectly housetrained.

Seriously, thank you, Sarah, for the invitation and your extreme patience. And congratulations on such a wonderful, romantic book.

I think all I'm missing now is a conversation topic. I know!

Simon v. Darcy. Discuss! Who is the starchiest at the outset? The best groveler in the end? (um, since I haven't read the end yet, I'm just assuming on Simon's part here…) Who would win in a cage match? Who would look better spear-fishing on a desert island?

Oh, boy am I afraid of *this* topic. But, it's guests choice…so discuss! We'll choose one commenter on Monday to win a copy of One Dance With a Duke and the STUNNING STUNNING cover flat of A NIGHT TO SURRENDER!

And thanks for coming over to play, Tessa! xoxo

Karina Cooper Will Survive the Apocalypse

I'm always thrilled to meet new writers. It's so exciting for me because I still think of writers as these magical, otherworldly people who are special in every way. Yes. I know I've written books…but I don't think of myself as a writer. You see…writers sit down and have the muse come to them. They are unique butterflies. They never write a bad sentence. And they most definitely get out of their pajamas before 3pm. I am none of those things.

Karina Cooper was introduced to me as a writer. Even better, a debut paranormal writer with Avon Books. Her first novel, Blood of the Wicked, is about witches. And soldiers. And the hero is named Silas. So I'm in.

In Blood of the Wicked, Jessie and Silas are faced with a similar decision: what is it they need – from life, from themselves, from each other! – to not just survive, but to live. The world has been set on its collective ear by… magic? Mayhem? Nature? No one knows, but the witch-hunting Mission is all too happy to stamp out the heretical men and women who certainly didn't help matters.

And because she's one of these magical writers, I find her fascinating. Even moreso now that I know that she has plans to survive the apocalypse. What she doesn't know is that when the rapture comes (I'm told the date is October 21st now), I'm going to go hang out with her (Baxter is good with cats).

But she doesn't have enough room for all of us, and since I called dibs on being her sidekick…she's sharing with you: Eleven Things She Needs to Survive the Apocalypse!

Welcome, Karina!

So, as you can clearly tell, I'm a heathen who was not Raptured. The apocalypse appears to have given me a miss, which is extremely fortunate because I didn't actually have this list of necessary survival tools until just now.

Why would I need it, you ask? Well, Rapture notwithstanding, it's because catostrophic events that lead to a post-apocalyptic world where men and women are hunted down for being different have been weighing on my mind. I can't imagine why.

"Oh, no!" you say, "Karina, you're addicted to the internet! And anime! And good books and cherries and tea! How ever will you survive?"

Waaaaay ahead of you. With the help of my good friend Nae, I've come up with eleven things I need to survive an apocalypse.

1. Super Irish Breakfast Tea, by Stash Teas – Let's face it. I'm a caffeine addict. Like, whoa. I love my coffee, I love my tea, and of all the teas I've ever had, this brand and flavor of tea is extremely rich, extremely dark, extremely strong. Plus, a bonus, I can get it in bulk! If I start collecting it now, I should have more than enough to see me through… what, you think maybe a month?

2. A cat – I am a crazy cat lady, after all. And every wandering soul forging a blazing path across barren wastelands needs a companion. Nae suggested I get two,because then I can breed them! (Did you know if that two cats are left to their own devices, they can – in those two cat's lifetime alone – breed 420,000 cats? That's 420,000 cats between parents, children, and grandchildren, even before the parent cats die. I am the crazy cat lady!)

3. A hunk – It really doesn't matter who. I mean, if the mancandy survives the apocalypse, that's great, but I wouldn't want my poor, bereaved husband to have to carry all eleven of our things. Let's get Thor to do it.

4. A journal – If I can't write on my computer (who's got the luxury of a computer when the world has gone to pot?), then I'll need an outlet for all these crazy meanderings! Besides, where else am I supposed to record all those naughty thoughts about our traveling hunk?

5. Batteries – Lots and lots of batteries. I asked Nae why she suggested this one and she said, "Because you're going to find lots and lots of junk that needs batteries, but not much that actually already has them." Nae's a smart girl.

6. A donkey – And why not? If the Post Man can travel around the world reciting Shakespeare with a donkey, then I'm pretty sure I can travel around reciting… Well, do you suppose there'd be much call for romance stories in a post-apocalyptic world? Anyway, regardless, we'll need a donkey to carry stuff. Oh, wait, is that what I said the hunk was for? … Damn. This bears rethinking.

7. Goggles – Every cool post-apocalyptic girl needs goggles. They are simply de rigeur for any decent wasteland-crawling survivor. Am I right?

8. Post-its – In every color. Not only is this the only way I'll be able to plot my epic romantic naughty stories, but I can use them as a marker. A sort of, "Karina was here!" Maybe my fans—well,those who survive—could use them to find me?

9. A weapon – The nature of this weapon would depend entirely on the nature of the apocalypse. Everybody knows that a rotary shotgun is the best defense against a zombie, but a baseball bat will do in a pinch. So will a lead pipe. However, against a chemical apocalypse, neither of these things is a great choice. In that case, my weapon might just be a bag full of syringes chock full of a suspicious looking liquid. It could just be

molasses, but they won't know that. Only my cats will.

10. A rebreather – Because chemical warfare sucks. Also, sandstorms.

11. Books – It's all well and good to write your own books, but as the Great Book Devourer, I can't possibly subside on my books alone. From Regency to paranormal; historical to… well, I suppose if it's post-apocalyptic it's all historical. I gotta have them. That makes for one tired donkey! Bonus: books make excellent weapons.

There we go! There's my eleven things I need to survive in a post-apocalyptic world. What about you? What are the things you need to tackle the apocalypse? Tell us in comments for a chance to win a copy of Blood of the Wicked! We'll choose one lucky commenter on Friday!

Eleven Questions with Elisabeth Naughton!

I'm so happy to host Elisabeth Naughton as part of the release month celebration of Eleven Scandals to Start to Win a Duke's Heart! Elisabeth writes sexy romantic adventures and the smokin' hot Eternal Guardians series…and she's taken time out of her promotion of her latest–Bodyguards in Bed–to climb into the hot seat to answer Eleven Questions!

Welcome, Elisabeth!

1. Alpha or Beta?

Alpha, all the way. I'm married to one, so it's what I know (and love).

2. Virgin Widow or Secret Baby?

Secret baby. There's something about that big old secret. Though I'm curious…is a virgin widow even possible? (Okay, I know it's possible…I guess a better question is whether or not it's believable.)

3. Time Travel or Futuristic?

Time travel. I'm fascinated with history.

4. Hot as Sin or Cold as Ice?

Hot as sin. I hate being cold!

5. Spinster or First Season Out?

Hm…I like both. But I'd probably have to go for Spinster. The girl who's been overlooked and then is finally noticed? Compelling.

6. England or Anywhere but?

Since I live in the PNW, and England's weather tends to be like ours, I'd have to say…anywhere but.

7. Vampire or Shape Shifter?

Mm…now this is hard. I like both. But I'll go with shape shifter (since I'm writing one right now).

8. Small Town or Big City?

I lean toward the small town. Lends itself to quirky characters.

9. Wallflower or Belle of the Ball?

Wallflower…for the same reason I like the Spinster.

10. Unrequited love or love at first sight?

Love at first site. Bam. Leaves the hero wondering…what the hell?

11. Elisabeth's choice! Answer her question in comments, and one lucky winner will receive a copy of her latest, Bodyguards in Bed!

What's your favorite bodyguard story (in any genre)?

Share your favorite bodyguard story in comments…and we'll choose one winner on Friday to win a signed copy of Bodyguards in Bed!

Eleven Questions with Miranda Neville!

I (heart) Miranda Neville. She's hysterically funny, exceedingly clever, a real-live Brit AND writes Regencies. AND…her next book …The Amorous Education of Celia Seaton has a title that, of course, I adore.

So, basically what I'm saying is, Stop it. She's fabulous! So when I was putting together the idea for Eleven Questions to celebrate the release month of Eleven Scandals to Start to Win a Duke's Heart, of course, I went straight to Miranda, who I knew would have opinions on all of these *very important* topics!

Sure enough, she replied with this: "Wah!! I don't want to choose. I want everything. (Tantrum)"

But she was a trooper…and ultimately did the work…and made her choices. Sort of.

1) Alpha or Beta?

I love a Beta who discovers his inner Alpha. Or vice versa. (That's having my cake and eating it too, heh heh)

2) Virgin Widow or Secret Baby?

I suppose I really can't have both this time. Secret Baby. I'm absolutely dying to write one. Or Virgin Widower.

3) Time Travel or Futuristic?

Time Travel. I love seeing modern characters confronted with the realities of ye olde plumbing.

4) Hot as Sin or Cold as Ice?

Hot, hot, hot. Sin, sin, sin.

5) Spinster or First Season Out?

Spinster

6) England or Anywhere but?

England. But about a quarter of my WIP is set in … oh horrors, don't tell my editor …. France.

7) Vampire or Shape Shifter?

Shape Shifter. I love me some furries.

8) Small town or Big city?

I want to read the story of the woman who, tired of the gossip and artificiality of her small town, finds a sense of community and a hunky advertising executive among the wacky inhabitants of the Upper West Side of Manhattan. (Sarah's note: I, also would like to read this story. Someone get writing!)

9) Wallflower or Belle of the Ball?

That's a tough one. I'm feeling ornery this morning so I'm going for Belle of the Ball.

10) Unrequited love or love at first sight?

Unrequited love.

11) Miranda's choice! Answer her question in comments for a chance to win a copy of The Wild Marquis, the first book in the Burgundy Club Series!

I'm preparing a proposal and I need help with my next heroine. Shady Widowed Adventuress or Duke's Daughter with a Bad Reputation? Which would you rather read?

Oooh…I love me a heroine with a terrible reputation…but I admit to being intrigued by "Shady Adventuress"…tough one! Answer Miranda in comments, and we'll choose one lucky commenter on Friday to win a copy of her book!

Eleven Questions with Sophie Jordan!

Sophie Jordan is my favorite. It's true, I fan girl over her far too much, but she tolerates the squeeing and the freaking out that I do whenever I read one of her books, and she suffers through my questions about how, precisely, she came up with a book as SUPREMELY AMAZING as Sins of a Wicked Duke and then AGAIN with Wicked Nights with A Lover all while ALSO writing amazing YA and awesome paranormals (I mean…seriously? Overachieve much?).

Sophie took time out of her incredibly busy schedule writing the third book in the Firelight series and getting ready for her next historical, Wicked in Your Arms, and her next paranormal Night Falls on the Wicked, to hop in the hot seat for a quick-and-dirty Eleven Questions to celebrate the release of Eleven Scandals to Start to Win a Duke's Heart!

1) Alpha or Beta?

Um, alpha, without a doubt!! Or better yet … the alpha posing as a beta!

2) Virgin Widow or Secret Baby?

Well … I have to go with the premise I've written because it was so fun — virgin widow!

3) Time Travel or Futuristic?

Time Travel

4) Hot as Sin or Cold as Ice?

Hot as sin!

5) Spinster or First Season Out?

Ooh, spinster, every time! Gotta shake up that jaded and neglected lady with a little toe-curling passion!

6) England or Anywhere but?

England!

7) Vampire or Shape Shifter?

Vampire!

8) Small town or Big city?

Small town!

9) Wallflower or Belle of the Ball?

Wallflower! Just like with spinsters, I'm a fan of the underdog.

10) Unrequited love or love at first sight?

Unrequited love.

11) Sophie's turning the tables! Answer her question in comments for a chance to win a copy of her most recent historical, Wicked Nights with a Lover!

All right – I got to know! Early or late to bed? What do you prefer … the hero and heroine "cat and mousing" around the matter or getting straight to business?

Oooh…I can't wait to hear what people think on this one…it's a question that I think lots of romance writers struggle with! Leave your thoughts in comments, and we'll choose a winner on Monday!