Felicia Denise's Blog, page 49
February 5, 2018
Quotable – August Wilson
August Wilson – (1945-2005) two-time Pulitzer Prize-winning author of Fences, The Piano Lesson, King Hedley II, Ma Rainy’s Black Bottom, Joe Turner’s Come and Gone, Seven Guitars, Two Trains Running, Jitney and Radio Golf. Image from the Boston Globe.
“You can put law on paper but that don’t make it right.”
“You got to be right with yourself before you can be right with anybody else.”
“My early attempts writing plays, which are very poetic, did not use the language that I work in now. I didn’t recognize the poetry in everyday language of black America. I thought I had to change it to create art.”
“Have a belief in yourself that is bigger than anyone’s disbelief.”
“Confront the dark parts of yourself, and work to banish them with illumination and forgiveness. Your willingness to wrestle with your demons will cause your angels to sing.”
February 4, 2018
Farewell to a Grand Lady | #52weeks52stories
Changing gears for this week’s entry to pay tribute to someone very special.
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We said goodbye to a grand lady last week. A woman of old world style, grace, and polite manners. For most of the thirty-six years I’d known her, she was fastidious… meticulous, always doing things the proper way.
She was my mother-in-law, Dorothy Reevers.
When you first met Dorothy, you knew she was a different breed, formed from a mold broken long ago.
Dorothy’s creole features were obvious—fair, mulatto skin, thick, dark hair, and almond-shaped [image error]eyes. But when she spoke it left many confused. While her own French-Creole mother barely spoke enough English to manage the household, Dorothy had no European lilt, West Indian pidgin or Louisiana geechie in her speech. She and her older brother, James, spoke with perfect diction and enunciation. And neither spoke a word of French. Their father, Elijah forbade it, believing their ethnic heritage was barrier enough to a successful future.
Julmiez, Dorothy’s mother, agreed to her children not learning or speaking French, but one thing she wouldn’t compromise on was school. Dorothy received her entire education from kindergarten through college from parochial schools in and around Berkeley, California where she was born. Some of her best anecdotes were about nuns in the classroom… especially Sister Helen Grace. Even after converting to Seventh Day Adventism years later. Dorothy would continue to genuflect whenever she passed a Catholic church.
With her poise and grace, it’s not hard to believe Dorothy was a debutante and introduced to society at sixteen. Her high morals and business-like attitude were greatly admired in the community and she was called upon to mentor to other young debutantes and would even serve as an officer of the Debutante Society.
When I met this incredible woman more than forty years later, I knew she was a force to be reckoned with. I also knew I was being observed… and graded as a daughter-in-law. I won her approval less than a week later after making dinner for her. She fell in love with me after having my lasagna! For the next three decades, I would be required to bring lasagna to all family gatherings, church functions, and even a couple of potlucks at her job.
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For most of Dorothy’s career, she worked for the United States Military and in civil service.
Standing only four feet, ten inches tall, Dorothy wore four-inch heels every day of her life until she retired in 1989. She didn’t do it be ‘be’ taller. The few extra inches helped to put things within reach of her tiny frame. Dorothy was independent and self-sufficient and refused to be looked down on because of her stature.
And she never backed away from a fight.
When we met in early 1982, Dorothy and several co-workers had filed suit against their employer, the State of California, for working them in higher rank classifications past labor law limits and without the higher wages for those ranks.
Over the next few years, her co-workers were bullied and harassed into dropping out of the suit. Some retired, others moved away and dropped out of sight. By 1987, Dorothy was the sole plaintiff. And she wouldn’t budge.
As assistant to the department’s director, Dorothy had a laundry list of job duties, and in true job
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In this photo, Dorothy is pregnant with my future husband!
intimation tactics, her boss would add others at random. (Never mind some of them fell in line with the very reason employees filed suit to begin with.)
Shortly before her retirement, the courts ruled the state had acted in bad faith and did violate labor laws.
The state also lost on appeal.
As the lone plaintiff, Dorothy won all her back-pay plus punitive damages.
When I congratulated her, she simply shook her head and said, “Dear, what they did was wrong, and you can’t hide wrong forever.”
It was just that simple for her.
As was life.
Dorothy believed in God, home, and family. Even when ill, I don’t know of a day when she missed saying morning prayers. And I don’t mean, “God bless the poor, etc.”, but literally down on her knees at her bedside…with a list of names and their situations!
Having one sibling, and both parents coming from small families, Dorothy had a strong sense of family, and longed for a large family. The mother of four had ten grandchildren, twelve great grandchildren, and two great-great grandchildren! And, she doted on each and every one. It was inspiring to see someone get so much joy from making others happy.
But with joy comes sadness and Dorothy was no stranger to it. She lost her dad in 1964 and her mom in 1984. (Julmiez Davis passed away nine days short of her 101st birthday.) Death is a part of life and Dorothy mourned her parents as most adult children with families of their own do while moving on with life.
However, in the early 2000s, her resolve was sorely tested.
In the span of three short years, Dorothy lost her oldest grandson, brother (and only sibling), and her husband of fifty years, Elmer… all to cancer.[image error]
They were devastating blows which temporarily impacted her health. Yet, as her health improved, Dorothy appeared to be stronger and more resilient.
But fate wasn’t done with her. In January of 2008, Dorothy’s oldest daughter, and a great-granddaughter were killed along with seven others in a tour bus accident during a high school ski trip.
Dorothy was the epitome of a strong woman, comforting others. She attended a memorial service at her great-granddaughter’s high school, where she embraced and comforted students and faculty… and added more names to her ever-growing prayer list.
However, even the strongest among us can only withstand so much loss, and an emotionally broken heart can only be broken once. If it’s not allowed to heal fully, subsequent turmoil rocks us to our souls, stealing our essence a little at a time.
[image error]This was the case with Dorothy. Never fully recovered from losing close family and the love of her life, the losses changed her. Not in a drastic way or by radical measures. But, her smile wasn’t quite as bright. The sparkle in her eyes we all were so used to seeing was replaced by a sadness at burying too many family members who should have outlived her.
Dorothy passed away on January 12, 2018 at the age of 93. While she took medication for mild dementia and a blood platelet problem, she wasn’t ‘sick’ or suffering from a major illness. When she and I last spoke the week before Christmas and I asked how she was doing, she replied, “Dear, I’m just tired.” She went quickly, from a cardiac episode. Paramedics arrived only six minutes after being called but could not revive her.
As I looked around during her memorial service, I realized there was only one person there I did not know. So loved and respected was this wonderful woman, people traveled to Arizona from as far away as California and New York to celebrate her life and say their last goodbyes. Dorothy enriched every life she touched, never expecting or wanting anything in return.
She was a blessing not fully realized until she was gone.
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Song Lyric Sunday | “All I Ask” – Adele
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Song Lyric Sunday was created by Helen Vahdati from This Thing Called Life One Word at a Time. For complete rules or to join in the fun, click here.
The theme for Song Lyric Sunday this week is “truth”.
Like Bonnie Raitt’s I Can’t Make You Love Me, my post from a few weeks ago, Adele knows the truth but wants the lie… at least for one more night with a man who doesn’t share her feelings in All I Ask. The video is from a live performance on Ellen last February.
Song Lyric Sunday on Nesie’s Place.
Disclaimer: I have no copyrights to the song and/or video and/or hyperlinks to songs and/or videos and/or gifs above. No copyright infringement intended.
“All I Ask”
By Adele
Writer(s): Bruno Mars, Philip Lawrence, Adele Laurie Adkins, Christopher Brown
I will leave my heart at the door
I won’t say a word
They’ve all been said before, you know
So why don’t we just play pretend
Like we’re not scared of what is coming next
Or scared of having nothing left
Look, don’t get me wrong
I know there is no tomorrow
All I ask is
If this is my last night with you
Hold me like I’m more than just a friend
Give me a memory I can use
Take me by the hand while we do what lovers do
It matters how this ends
‘Cause what if I never love again?
I don’t need your honesty
It’s already in your eyes
And I’m sure my eyes, they speak for me
No one knows me like you do
And since you’re the only one that matters
Tell me who do I run to?
Look, don’t get me wrong
I know there is no tomorrow
All I ask is
If this is my last night with you
Hold me like I’m more than just a friend
Give me a memory I can use
Take me by the hand while we do what lovers do
It matters how this ends
‘Cause what if I never love again?
Let this be our lesson in love
Let this be the way we remember us
I don’t wanna be cruel or vicious
And I ain’t asking for forgiveness
All I ask is
If this is my last night with you
Hold me like I’m more than just a friend
Give me a memory I can use
Take me by the hand while we do what lovers do
It matters how this ends
‘Cause what if I never love again?
Quotable – Toni Morrison
Toni Morrison
(African-American novelist and professor)
Image from Pinterest
“If there’s a book that you want to read, but it hasn’t been written yet, then you must write it.”
“You wanna fly, you got to give up the shit that weighs you down.”
February 3, 2018
No More Excuses
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Another snippet from ‘Heartburn’ and Quinn Landon’s journey to free herself from her judgmental family and adulterous husband.
Though she went to bed fatigued and stressed over the late-afternoon argument with her brother, Quinn Landon woke refreshed. She was anxious to get to the veteran’s outreach center and focus on something other than her problems.
Several weeks had passed since Quinn last volunteered. Increased job duties and her failing marriage consumed her time and energy. Renewing her commitment to community service was important to Quinn. It was her way of giving back for all the support and encouragement center director Vince Saxton, and his incredible staff had given her brother, Clinton.
After over a decade in the Army, Clinton Clark returned home six years ago with PTSD, night tremors, and considerable anger. It was a shock to the Clark family to see what service to his country had done to Clinton. Eddie and Katherine Clark soon overcame their initial shock, however.
Insisting Clinton needed time alone to sort out his thoughts while receiving treatment, his parents found a tiny apartment near the outreach center and moved their son right in. They never mentioned his name or visited him.
His siblings were confused at first but soon adopted the same mindset as their parents-out of sight, out of mind.
All except Quinn.
She was devastated by her brother’s mental and physical condition and angered at the ease their parents had removing him from their lives.
Katherine Clark made the situation even worse when she refused to share Clinton’s address.
“Just leave him be, Quinn Avery. He’ll come back to us when he’s himself again.”
“And what if that never happens, mother? What if he’s never himself again, then what? Do we even know what happened to him?”
“Clinton will be just fine, I’m sure of it. And we were told there was some sort of ambush and quite a few members of his unit were killed. I don’t want to know any more than that.”
“That’s just awesome, mom! Your son’s living in his own personal hell and you don’t care why, nor do you intend to stand by him. Someone is sure to give us a Family-of-the-Year award!”
“Quinn! That’s no way to speak to your mother.”
Oscar slumped, his body shrinking in size from the cold gaze his wife pinned on him. He thought better of saying any more, sure Quinn wasn’t past her anger at finding out about his latest affair.
“Thank you, Oscar, but I’m more than used to my youngest child’s flair for drama.”
At first surprised at Katherine’s comment, Quinn’s features morphed into a smirk.
“I learned from the best, mom.” Quinn turned to leave her parents’ home.
“Just where do you think you’re going, Quinn Avery?”
“To find my brother. No more excuses.”
Quinn stormed out the front door, rage making her deaf to Katherine and Oscar’s cries for her to come back.
©2017 Felicia Denise, All Rights Reserved
Quotable – W.E.B. Du Bois
William Edward Burghardt (W.E.B.) Du Bois (1868-1963) sociologist, historian, civil rights activist, editor, and author. Image from AAIHS.
“A little less complaint and whining, and a little more dogged work and manly striving, would do us more credit than a thousand civil rights bills.”
“The cost of liberty is less than the price of repression.”
“To be a poor man is hard, but to be a poor race in a land of dollars is the very bottom of hardships.”
February 2, 2018
Downsized
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Flash Fiction: Word prompt – downsized
Ramsey felt God had punished him enough.
An honors graduate of Northwestern with nineteen years professional business experience should not be managing a second-rate grocery store.
He fumed thinking about the brand new sixty-foot boat his brother now owned.
Ramsey Carter’s pulse quickened remembering the sadness of his wife’s eyes viewing the photos from her sister’s European vacation.
The former new accounts director owned a boat once. Ramsey took his wife to Europe for their eleventh wedding anniversary… thirteen years ago.
But that was all in the past. The boat was sold two years ago in Ramsey’s second full year of unemployment. Unless they won the lottery, the Carters would never see Europe again.
Closing his laptop, Ramsey pinched the bridge of his noise. Grateful the new work schedule was complete, Ramsey wasn’t looking forward to the usual employee complaints. His penny-pinching regional manager decreased Ramsey’s allotted monthly staffing hours again. The deli and bakery would have to close five hours early to keep checkout lanes and customer service staffed.
Senior employees would scream. Insisting they’d already paid their dues by working the inconvenient shifts and doing grunt work, being scheduled for swing or short shifts was a slap in the face to long term staff.
Ramsey Carter agreed with them. He believed years of service and loyalty to an employer should mean something… have some value.
Or at least he used to.
He believed it right up to the day Bentek Corp’s security escorted him to the parking garage. Security manager Dick Roddy took Ramsey’s employee identification card, handed him an envelope, and walked away.
Downsized.
So, while understanding employee anger at their situation, Ramsey had a job to do. Take the newly allotted hours and staff the store for eighteen hours a day, seven days a week.
At least he wasn’t firing anyone. Yet.
Swearing under his breath, Ramsey eased his large, brawny frame from the cheap, aluminum office chair. Though he’d been tempted to bring in his own chair, Ramsey resisted. That spoke of a long-term commitment to Good Buy Foods he wasn’t interested in making. Grabbing his store keys, Ramsey headed for shipping and receiving to double check the evening lock-down.
Passing through Household Goods and hearing his name called, Ramsey turned. The throbbing in his head was immediate along with the bitter taste in his mouth.
Delia Pennock, health and beauty clerk, teetered toward him on heels too high… and unsafe for the workplace.
How many times would Ramsey have to warn this woman?
Before Delia caught up to him, Ramsey’s inter-store walkie buzzed. The display showed the call was coming from Ramsey’s intended destination — shipping and receiving.
“What’s up, Minas?”
“Need you back here, Ramsey. Now.”
“On my way.”
Red-faced and out of breath, Delia reached Ramsey as he returned the walkie to his belt-clip.
“I love how you’re letting your hair grow out, Ramsey. Those dark curls are sexy and rakish.”
He ignored her attempt at flattery. “What can I do for you, Delia?”
“Well, I know you’re working on the next schedule. Do be a dear and not schedule me for the opening shift or on the checkout stands.”
“Sorry, Delia. The schedule’s done. You open on the express checkout week two of the schedule.”
He turned to leave, but Delia caught hold of his arm. Ramsey looked back to find the bottle-blonde attempting a full-fledged pout. Pursing his lips, Ramsey stepped out of Delia’s grip.
“Ramsey! Six in the morning is just too early for someone with a social life as active as mine.”
“It’s your turn, Delia. You know the rotation.”
Delia had gall. He had to give her that. Most employee scheduling concerns were about babysitting issues, evening classes, and caring for disabled family members. Only Delia would want special treatment so she could sit in a bar all night.
Though her employee file carried a birth-date making Delia thirty-nine-years-old, Ramsey Carter would swear in open court sitting on top of Bible-mountain she was older than his forty-seven years. Even from where he stood, Ramsey could see the layers of makeup on Delia’s face intended to hide wrinkles. It didn’t.
“But, Ramsey-”
“I have to go, Delia. Problem in S and R. And Delia,” he looked at her feet, “the shoes.”
“Oh, okay. We’ll talk… later.”
Ramsey walked away in double-time to keep from laughing in the woman’s face.
If the employee rumor mill were to be believed, Delia Pennock lured three of the last four store managers into sexual trysts outside… and inside the store. The fourth manager was female and not into women, even though it was said Delia tried anyway.
Ramsey Carter had no intention of becoming the over-the-hill party girl’s latest conquest.
Toni Temple-Carter was the sunshine in Ramsey’s life. He’d loved her since the day she’d walked into their seventh-grade English class. But the shy, awkward Ramsey Carter resigned to be just friends with the dark-skinned beauty. For six years Ramsey watched Toni date other guys, his heart breaking piece by piece each time. When he learned Toni would also be attending Northwestern, it cheered him to know he would still get to see Toni from time to time.
Ramsey’s world spun out of control the day Toni Temple plopped down on the bench next to him in the Student Union.
“Do you like me, Ramsey… at all?”
Ramsey, still gawky at nineteen, sputtered for the right words.
“Huh? Like you? Of… of course, Toni. We’re… friends. Have been for a l-long time.”
“Why haven’t you ever asked me out?”
Ramsey’s eyes widened in disbelief.
“Ask… you out? Because… I thought… we’re friends. I didn’t think-”
“Ask me out.”
“Huh?”
“Ask me out.”
Understanding registered with Ramsey and the two young people shared a grin.
“Will you go out me, Toni?”
“Yes, Ramsey Carter. I thought you’d never ask.”
They’d been inseparable ever since, marrying five years later.
Committed to each other, the Carters had avoided most of the pitfalls which darken some marriages. When their second son entered college, Toni and Ramsey were excited about the future and making plans. Plans which imploded less than a year later when Ramsey was downsized out of Bentek Corp.
Toni was steadfast, never complaining about their financial situation. At the end of her work day, the nursing manager would often pick up extra hours in patient care to help with their household budget. Toni never blamed Ramsey or even Bentek for their lot and Ramsey was in awe of her. Each time he looked at her, Ramsey saw nothing but love in her eyes.
Other downsized Bentek employees lost everything… homes, savings, and their marriages. But Toni was Ramsey’s fortress, holding him up and shielding him from the depression which threatened to take him.
Yes, the Carters sold their boat, the cabin upstate, and their timeshares. And they no longer splurged on artsy furnishings or ate out. But they had saved their home and kept both their sons in college. Toni often said they were an unbeatable team, but Ramsey knew better. Toni’s love for him was his armor against the world, and her endless faith in him gave him the strength to keep moving forward.
When Ramsey suggested putting their artistic sides to good use by getting into the on-line graphic arts business, Toni not only agreed, but she researched and found the best on-line classes they could afford. Eighteen months later, the couple was close to realizing their dream and beginning a new journey together. Ramsey knew it would be a struggle at first, both of them working full-time while trying to start their own business. But Ramsey looked forward to the day when he was his own boss.
Opening the security door separating shipping and receiving from the rest of the store. Ramsey Carter gawked at the sight before him.
Department manager, Minas Fortuni, stood at the bay doors attempting to unbend metal around a three-foot hole in the door.
“What the hell?” Ramsey inched forward, his stomach churning at the paperwork in his immediate future. “What happened, Minas?”
Shaking his head, Minas gave up his futile attempts to close the hole.
“That last delivery guy… from Buckley Dairy… didn’t swing the back end of his trailer wide end enough. Backed right into the door. He leaned out the window and saw what he’d done. Know what he did then, Ramsey?”
The store manager stared at the hole in the door, still incredulous.
Minas continued. “He said, “Oops, sorry, dude” and drove off. Just like that.”
Ramsey hung his head defeated. He was tired, hungry and he wanted to go home. This day had to end.
Ramsey Carter decided it was time to delegate. “You busy this evening, Minas?”
“No, and I already put in a call to Rolla-Doorz. It’s going to cost extra, but they’re sending a guy over.”
“Good thinking, Minas. If you’re willing to stay and cover for me, I’ll authorize the overtime… as long as it takes.”
“Of course, I’ll stay. It’s Patty’s turn to host girls’ night. You’re saving me from watching a bunch of baby boomer females get drunk and cavort around the house to the soundtrack from “Grease.” It’s a win-win situation for us both. Go home, man… I got you covered.”
“Thanks, Minas. I owe you for this… big-time!”
Returning to his office in record time, Ramsey made quick notes about the incident and put the Buckley Dairy file on his desk for tomorrow. Before Ramsey could lock his file cabinet, Dale Johnson from the meat department leaned into his office.
“Hey, Ramsey… got a slip and fall near aisle twelve. The woman says the floor was wet and Good Buy Foods is going to pay for her pain and suffering.”
Ramsey leaned against his desk, ready to scream.
“Is the woman okay? Anything broken? Bleeding? Do we need to get paramedics here?”
Dale smirked. “Ramsey… she’s fine.”
“Is someone with her?”
“Yeah. Gail from the front desk.”
“Okay, on my way.”
Ramsey pulled an accident report from the file cabinet along with the store’s Polaroid and headed out of his office. He stopped and returned to his desk, grabbing his cell phone.
Ramsey had to let Toni know he’d be late getting home… again.
©2017 Felicia Denise, All Rights Reserved
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Quotable – Langston Hughes 1902-1967
James Mercer Langston Hughes – an American poet, social activist, novelist, playwright, and columnist from Joplin, Missouri. He was one of the earliest innovators of the then-new literary art form called jazz poetry. Image from NYDailynews.
“I swear to the Lord I still can’t see why Democracy means Everybody but me.”
“An artist must be free to choose what he does, certainly, but he must also never be afraid to do what he might choose.”
“Hold fast to dreams, for if dreams die, life is a broken-winged bird that cannot fly.”
“What happens to a dream deferred? Does it dry up like a raisin in the sun?… Or does it explode?”
“I have discovered in life that there are ways of getting almost anywhere you want to go, if you really want to go.”
Quotable ~ Maya Angelou ~1928 – 2014
Image from Pinterest
February 1, 2018
Quotable – Morgan Freeman
An American actor, producer, and narrator, Freeman won an Academy Award in 2005 for Best Supporting Actor with Million Dollar Baby (2004), He has received Oscar nominations for his performances in Street Smart (1987), Driving Miss Daisy (1989), The Shawshank Redemption (1994) and Invictus (2009). He has also won a Golden Globe Award and a Screen Actors Guild Award. He got his break as part of the cast of the 1970s children’s program The Electric Company.
Morgan Freeman is ranked as the 3rd highest box office star with over $4.316 billion total box office gross, an average of $74.4 million per film. Image from Google.
“You’re going to relegate my history to a month.”
“I don’t want a Black History Month. Black history is American history.”
“When I was a teenager, I began to settle into school because I’d discovered the extracurricular activities that interested me: music and theater.”
“The best way to guarantee a loss is to quit.”
“Learning how to be still, to really be still and let life happen – that stillness becomes a radiance.”
