Shilpi's Blog, page 6
February 7, 2018
Book Review for "Key to my soul"
Book Name: Key to My Soul
Author: Probal Mazumdar
Publisher: Maple Press
No of pages: 300
My Rating: ****
ReviewI received the copy of "Key to my Soul" by Probal Mazumdar for an honest review. I would first thank the author for the copy and I must say I have thoroughly enjoyed my reading this blue book. It has love, mystery, tragedy, pain, and every other possible flavour one would seek in a fiction. The story revolves around two childhood mates, Siddharth and Hazel. Its about how they met, they came close and separated. The met again after 17 years but in weird situation. The suspense factor in the writing style of the author would keep you engaged till the end, though I found in between the narration exaggerated and I skipped few pages. The story would definitely take you to your school days, and you would feel like a teen ager again. The language is simple and poetic at places. I loved few one liners used by the author at places.
The story involves the combination of past and present of Hazel and Sidhharth, which is very clearly narrated by the author. Love between the two souls when they were teen agers and how it matured when they met after 17 years could be sensed through his writing. The blurb is very justified, title is very apt but cover page could have been more impressive. Overall, I enjoyed reading "Key to my soul".
This valentine's day, I would say this is best gift to your loved ones.
Happy Reading
December 14, 2017
STAND STRONG: KEEPING FAITH AND CONQUERING FEAR
Stand Strong: Keeping Faith and Conquering Fear
by Shubha VilasPublished by: Jaico
'Stand Strong: Keeping Faith and Conquering Fear' is the fourth book of Shubha Vila of the series Ramayana : The Game of Life. Since childhood am seeing and hearing the stories of Ramayana, but I have never understood the true meaning of those tales. I got the real feel of Ramayana and understood what an epic it is after reading Stand Strong. The author has beautifully explained each character and every tale associated with. The language used is simply mesmerizing. I have thoroughly enjoyed my reading this book and would recommend this as a must read for the youth across the world.While reading Stand Strong, I was able to dive into the spiritual world of Ramayana and got to feel each and every character. The cover of book is completely apt, giving a peaceful feel. The language is beautiful and easy to understand. A reader would just flow with each and every page. My strong recommendation to must read this book
Ratings:Cover: 3.5/5 StarsPlot: 5/5 starsNarration: 5/5 starsCharacterization: 5/5 Stars
Overall I will give 5 stars to the book *****. Stand Strong by Shubha Vilas, definitely touches the heart of the reader and gives strong messages, that nothing on the Earth happens purposelessly, every incident and every birth has a meaning hidden. Just a flawless work.... amazing.
by Shubha VilasPublished by: Jaico'Stand Strong: Keeping Faith and Conquering Fear' is the fourth book of Shubha Vila of the series Ramayana : The Game of Life. Since childhood am seeing and hearing the stories of Ramayana, but I have never understood the true meaning of those tales. I got the real feel of Ramayana and understood what an epic it is after reading Stand Strong. The author has beautifully explained each character and every tale associated with. The language used is simply mesmerizing. I have thoroughly enjoyed my reading this book and would recommend this as a must read for the youth across the world.While reading Stand Strong, I was able to dive into the spiritual world of Ramayana and got to feel each and every character. The cover of book is completely apt, giving a peaceful feel. The language is beautiful and easy to understand. A reader would just flow with each and every page. My strong recommendation to must read this book
Ratings:Cover: 3.5/5 StarsPlot: 5/5 starsNarration: 5/5 starsCharacterization: 5/5 Stars
Overall I will give 5 stars to the book *****. Stand Strong by Shubha Vilas, definitely touches the heart of the reader and gives strong messages, that nothing on the Earth happens purposelessly, every incident and every birth has a meaning hidden. Just a flawless work.... amazing.
December 10, 2017
The Joy of Little Things
The Joy of little things
“I am beginning to recognise that real happinessIsn’t something large and looming on the horizon ahead but something small, numerous and already here. The smile of someone you love. The decent breakfast. The warm sunset. Your little everday joys all lined up in a row.” ~ by Beau Taplin
The prominent lines by Beau Taplin solely grabbed my focus. These words left a remarkable mark on my little mind. Until now I was trapped in the whirlpool of being big, and has disremembered to celebrate the joy of liitle things. In the race of life, we struggle. We struggle to reach to our goals, but in this race we forget to rejoice the joys of little things. Have we ever tried to look back and see, that what we have lost, couldn’t be gained back again, it’s our youth, childhood, time with parents, etc etc.
The Joy of little things is about those little little things which appears to be very petty but embraces a colossal impact on us, may be for a day or for a lifetime.
I was busy, I was occupied,Didn’t had time to say hi,She came to meet me in my busy hours,But I was so occupied to feel her presence.
I was thirsty, I was hungry,I had no time to have a cup They offered me a cup,But where is the the time to sip it or a while.
I was tired, I was exhausted,I had no time to refresh myselfShe came to play with her teddy,But where is the time to play, with daddy
I was sleepy, I was lazyI had no time for a five minutes napIt was Sunday, could be a funday,But how to compromise with gym and workouts
Life is busy, so am IThe race is long for being big,But life is short, wait a bit,Rejoice the joys of little things
“I am beginning to recognise that real happinessIsn’t something large and looming on the horizon ahead but something small, numerous and already here. The smile of someone you love. The decent breakfast. The warm sunset. Your little everday joys all lined up in a row.” ~ by Beau Taplin
The prominent lines by Beau Taplin solely grabbed my focus. These words left a remarkable mark on my little mind. Until now I was trapped in the whirlpool of being big, and has disremembered to celebrate the joy of liitle things. In the race of life, we struggle. We struggle to reach to our goals, but in this race we forget to rejoice the joys of little things. Have we ever tried to look back and see, that what we have lost, couldn’t be gained back again, it’s our youth, childhood, time with parents, etc etc.
The Joy of little things is about those little little things which appears to be very petty but embraces a colossal impact on us, may be for a day or for a lifetime.
I was busy, I was occupied,Didn’t had time to say hi,She came to meet me in my busy hours,But I was so occupied to feel her presence.
I was thirsty, I was hungry,I had no time to have a cup They offered me a cup,But where is the the time to sip it or a while.
I was tired, I was exhausted,I had no time to refresh myselfShe came to play with her teddy,But where is the time to play, with daddy
I was sleepy, I was lazyI had no time for a five minutes napIt was Sunday, could be a funday,But how to compromise with gym and workouts
Life is busy, so am IThe race is long for being big,But life is short, wait a bit,Rejoice the joys of little things
December 7, 2017
Interview with Ravish T. Ram : Author of 'The Fictitious Dream'
Interview with Ravish T. RamAuthor of The Fictitious Dream
Q. Tell us something about yourself?
I love watching Cricket, movies and listening to music, Punjabi and hip-hop music are my favorite. I'm from Delhi living with my parents, wife and kids. I've done my English Hons. from Delhi University.
Q. When you started writing and what motivated you to write?
Book writing is something I longs from an early age of 10-12 years. And when I was doing my graduation in English literature the feelings grew more and more to write books which not only entertain the readers but also give a message to them. My love for writing motivated me to write books.
Q. What is your latest book about?
It is about a dream which the protagonist has but he is not able to fulfill it in normal circumstances. His dream was fulfilled but in most unusual ways. The story is full of suspense and leaves a message to the reader as well.
Q. What made you write this book?
To me dreams are important part of life and most of the people succumbs to the conditions and leave their dream behind and not happy at all working in something which is not at all related to the dream. With this thought in mind, I have written the book 'the fictitious dream'.
Q. Can we get a brief picture of this book?
Rak(the protagonist) wakes up one day to a different world altogether, where he is an inmate in a sanatorium – a place where the lines between sanity are insanity are blurred, and where he is forced to question what sanity is after all.
He has to experience every facet of life in this new dream-like world into which he walks in as a mental patient and journeys through as a husband, a friend and a lover, while taking up roles of a servant, a soldier, a prisoner, a fugitive and a leader of a crumbling kingdom.
Through this journey, Rak is forced to question everything he knows and believes, but in the end, is everything worth the trouble? Is what he experiences and learns even real or is there an even bigger lesson in the picture?
Q. What is your motive behind this book? Is there any particular reason that inspired you to write this topic?
I just want to give a simple message to the readers that If they have a dream, go for it. I know it is not easy to follow but they need to pursue it for a happy and fulfilling life.
Q. Are planning for to publish more books in near future? Any light on those, if you wish too.
Yes. Currently I'm working on another book, it is a romance book but with a touch of difference. There will be a whole new angel of love in it.
Q. Where do you see yourself 5 years from now? Any plans or expectations
To be known as a Good Author with bestselling books under my sleeves J
Q. Could you please share your writing and publishing experience with budding authors, any tips for them?
Reading a book and writing a book is completely different thing. Some people think that if they read a lot of books, they can write a good book as well but that's not the case. Writing takes a lot of effort and of-course time too. And selling a book is totally different thing. Marketing costs a lot of money as well. So before publishing a book, be prepared to have a lot of money.
Q. What according to you is the most difficult part from writing to publishing to marketing?
In current scenario writing a book and publishing it is quite easy as there are lots of publishers who help you with self-publishing. Marketing is one of the difficult parts. If you go for self-publishing don’t expect much from the publisher, they just publish your book and their work is over. You are on your own; you need to do all the marketing by yourself. If you get a publisher who can help you with marketing and on economy then consider yourself lucky.
Q. Two lines for the readers please …J
Research about the book before buying it. Read detailed reviews about a book before making a purchase.
November 12, 2017
Review of The Fictitious Dream
Heyy All,Recently, an author friend #Ravish T. Ram, send me his book The Fictitious Dream and gave me an opportunity to review it for him. Though this is going to be my first review of any book, I truly love the journey of reading and reviewing. So here it goes:
Book Name: The Fictitious Dream
Author: Ravish T. Ram
Press: The Notion Press
A good book to understand life through your dreams. The author has beautifully described the fictitious dream and involves all the masala, which includes philosophy, adventure, thrill, suspense, love emotion everything. The book explains life that what & how dreams to be followed. A fiction with philosophy is a good read. I would give 4 stars to the book and recommend all the readers to read and enjoy "The Fictitious Dream".
April 18, 2017
Dos and donts for debut authors
Dos and Donts for Debut Authors
When a writer decides to write a book, it involves thousands of emotions and expressions, but he will segregate them and selects the best one to be included in the book. Writing a book, is not just pen and paper, it's a journey. The most difficult journey, with number of obstacles to block your way of writing the book. But it happens, your pen has created a peice, a masterpiece, which needs to be nurtured like a baby.
But, what I have undergone and experienced is when its the first book, the excitement level is at cloud 9.The debut authors like me, are not aware of how to chose the best publishing house, marketing plan, package etc for the book. The prime aim initially is just publishing the book, rest is next. So, instead of nurturing your baby, you forcing it to jump in the well and swim.
No, its not the way. Publishing should be the final step. The first and foremost step is the best manuscript. Be confident that yo have read your manuscript atleast 5 times and edited it completely. The manuscript is very crucial before it is published so dont handover it before editing it thoroughly, because the world going to read it. So the first step is perfect manuscript.
Then, you would search for a publisher. And in most of the cases, a debut author is in a hurry for publishing the work. In hurry they ignore the pathway through traditional publishing and gets attracted to self publishing. Self publishing is good if you select the highest package, but if your budgets are low then self publishing is going to make things a little difficult for you. In limited budgets editing, marketing and promotions are not possible. Only publishing and distribution will happen. Though its understood that, it is very difficult to approach traditional press. They dont accept the manuscript so easily, but still try for a traditional press if you are confident about the book. The manuscript is everything, work on it, dont hurry. Till you have your manuscript, you have the power to decide.
Now marketing of a debut book. My personal experience says that even though you spend a lakh rupees on marketing, its not worth. A debut author is struggler in the world of books and readers.Why do you think a reader will spend his time and energy on a debut author? Just think why, may be your creative marketing might impress a few, but negative reviews would kill your sale. Hefty marketing strategies might generate traffic but not true buyers. True readers for a debut piece could be approached only through trust. An author has to develop trust in the minds of his readers. This process is lenghty, but is the only way how you can market your work successfully. Word of mouth is the best weapon to deal with marketing issues. This strategy works in the best way for the debut authors. It is very similar to movies in a way, because you would watch a movie which has good reviews, but might be not marketed so much. Good reviews counts a lot, it attracts buyers.
Huge country, like India has the mass. But, in this mass very few are reader and fewer are writers, you are one of them, so cherish yourself.
Happy writing....
When a writer decides to write a book, it involves thousands of emotions and expressions, but he will segregate them and selects the best one to be included in the book. Writing a book, is not just pen and paper, it's a journey. The most difficult journey, with number of obstacles to block your way of writing the book. But it happens, your pen has created a peice, a masterpiece, which needs to be nurtured like a baby.
But, what I have undergone and experienced is when its the first book, the excitement level is at cloud 9.The debut authors like me, are not aware of how to chose the best publishing house, marketing plan, package etc for the book. The prime aim initially is just publishing the book, rest is next. So, instead of nurturing your baby, you forcing it to jump in the well and swim.
No, its not the way. Publishing should be the final step. The first and foremost step is the best manuscript. Be confident that yo have read your manuscript atleast 5 times and edited it completely. The manuscript is very crucial before it is published so dont handover it before editing it thoroughly, because the world going to read it. So the first step is perfect manuscript.
Then, you would search for a publisher. And in most of the cases, a debut author is in a hurry for publishing the work. In hurry they ignore the pathway through traditional publishing and gets attracted to self publishing. Self publishing is good if you select the highest package, but if your budgets are low then self publishing is going to make things a little difficult for you. In limited budgets editing, marketing and promotions are not possible. Only publishing and distribution will happen. Though its understood that, it is very difficult to approach traditional press. They dont accept the manuscript so easily, but still try for a traditional press if you are confident about the book. The manuscript is everything, work on it, dont hurry. Till you have your manuscript, you have the power to decide.
Now marketing of a debut book. My personal experience says that even though you spend a lakh rupees on marketing, its not worth. A debut author is struggler in the world of books and readers.Why do you think a reader will spend his time and energy on a debut author? Just think why, may be your creative marketing might impress a few, but negative reviews would kill your sale. Hefty marketing strategies might generate traffic but not true buyers. True readers for a debut piece could be approached only through trust. An author has to develop trust in the minds of his readers. This process is lenghty, but is the only way how you can market your work successfully. Word of mouth is the best weapon to deal with marketing issues. This strategy works in the best way for the debut authors. It is very similar to movies in a way, because you would watch a movie which has good reviews, but might be not marketed so much. Good reviews counts a lot, it attracts buyers.
Huge country, like India has the mass. But, in this mass very few are reader and fewer are writers, you are one of them, so cherish yourself.
Happy writing....
February 2, 2011
Infidelity- a curse for a relationship.
"I love somebody else but I got married to someone else because of family pressure" or "I love my spouse but I met somebody whom I found really exciting". These two are a very common example of infidelity; there are several different examples for it too. Around 60% of couples, today face the problem of infidelity in relationship, may be due boredom, lost love, family pressure, attraction etc. Reasons are many but will negatively affect your present relationship.
If you are depending upon somebody emotionally that is also a kind of infidelity. This term doesnt have any specific definition but it can be defined only by you and your partner. You have to discuss and decide with your partner what infidelity is for you. There are extreme cases of infidelity defined by two couples. For one any kind of a relationship after marriage is acceptable, to any extent. And for the other couple even seeing or appreciating opposite sex is not allowed. These are different perceptions. These are their perceptions for their relationship and nobody can question them why. Dont try to follow anybody, if something is acceptable for someone, it wouldnt be necessarily for you too, because in relationship assumptions doesn't work.
The cases of Infidelity is increasing in India, but I dont feel modernization or education can be blamed for this. Because in ancient India situation was even worse, kings were allowed to have as many wives as they can, nobody questioned them. In villages or in a joint family system, when a spouse is out for job, then the lady had relation with other members of the family, but nobody questioned. So, just modernization can’t be blamed for this.Just the definition of infidelity has changed but it is prevailing from ancient period. It just that then woman never asked why.
If children are involved and then infidelity takes place, its a difficult situation for the kid. "There was an eight year old girl Ruchi who was very good at her studies and was living happily with her parents, till her dad started outstation trips. The day when her dad started outstation trips, her mom started involving with a neighbor. When dad came back from the trip the little chap told about the uncle, her mom got stunned. And later the arguments between the parents took a form of fight. The little chap thought it was all because of her. She thought that she has done something wrong. Her grades started affecting.
Such cases results into a divorce and leaves strong marks on kids, which cannot be healed.The girl learned to lie as her mom told her to not to tell daddy otherwise he will fight. She was loosing trust on her parents.
Nothing can be right or wrong we mess it up and make it wrong. A healthy and clear discussion with your spouse can clarify many problems. Its trust that is the backbone of any relationship, and once is broken is broken.
If you are depending upon somebody emotionally that is also a kind of infidelity. This term doesnt have any specific definition but it can be defined only by you and your partner. You have to discuss and decide with your partner what infidelity is for you. There are extreme cases of infidelity defined by two couples. For one any kind of a relationship after marriage is acceptable, to any extent. And for the other couple even seeing or appreciating opposite sex is not allowed. These are different perceptions. These are their perceptions for their relationship and nobody can question them why. Dont try to follow anybody, if something is acceptable for someone, it wouldnt be necessarily for you too, because in relationship assumptions doesn't work.
The cases of Infidelity is increasing in India, but I dont feel modernization or education can be blamed for this. Because in ancient India situation was even worse, kings were allowed to have as many wives as they can, nobody questioned them. In villages or in a joint family system, when a spouse is out for job, then the lady had relation with other members of the family, but nobody questioned. So, just modernization can’t be blamed for this.Just the definition of infidelity has changed but it is prevailing from ancient period. It just that then woman never asked why.
If children are involved and then infidelity takes place, its a difficult situation for the kid. "There was an eight year old girl Ruchi who was very good at her studies and was living happily with her parents, till her dad started outstation trips. The day when her dad started outstation trips, her mom started involving with a neighbor. When dad came back from the trip the little chap told about the uncle, her mom got stunned. And later the arguments between the parents took a form of fight. The little chap thought it was all because of her. She thought that she has done something wrong. Her grades started affecting.
Such cases results into a divorce and leaves strong marks on kids, which cannot be healed.The girl learned to lie as her mom told her to not to tell daddy otherwise he will fight. She was loosing trust on her parents.
Nothing can be right or wrong we mess it up and make it wrong. A healthy and clear discussion with your spouse can clarify many problems. Its trust that is the backbone of any relationship, and once is broken is broken.
Feel Good.. Live Great
Feel Good… Live Great!
We do a lot many things to look good, to appeal good… but do all these work when you don’t feel good.
Ya, Depression: a very common problem with women, to almost each and every woman whether she is working or a house wife. It’s a fact that after crossing an age of 25, women are twice more prone to depressive disorders then men. But the irony is, the cause of depression is just nothing, its all because of not feeling good. The reasons can be many and they are all because of external factors, may be boss, mother in law, husband, or neighbour, kids etc. The reasons are many, but they all are silly, they occur because you are filled with so much of energy and you don’t get the right path to utilise it, and then it burst out in the form of depressions and blaming others for your problems.
The problem of depression and mood fluctuation affects more to those ladies who leave jobs for family as a sacrifice. It develops an empty space, which keeps hitting them when they see peer group and their achievements. Today I was attending a session in my child’s school about ‘secrets of childhood’ and there a mother suddenly burst into tears and reason she said that she is not happy. She was not happy with life, not with her relationship and about everything. She left job five months back for her kid as her mom was not able to take care of the child. She was so upset that she considered herself as bad mom and a loser. She blamed almost everybody for her problems but was unable to realise that problem is not ‘they’ its ‘I’. It’s very simple that when I don’t feel good, I can’t make others feel good.
We are born as quite emotional and soft personalities, and that’s why we are bothered more for others than for ourselves. But the truth is that we are solely responsible for our own selves. If you are not happy than how can you make others happy? And even if you try to make everyone happy then there will be atleast one being who is annoyed with you. When you are sad and depressed, because some xyz said something bad to you, don’t you think you gave Mr. xyz the power to rule your life and make you sad. The world is not your responsibility, be happy then your surrounding will automatically will be driving according to you. Keep power of your life with you and don’t let others to rule you.
To feel good, to fight your depressions and to remain happy you don’t need to do yoga, or some course or any such artificial thing which is suggested to you. We only know how we will feel good and nobody else, but we don’t have time to know How. Try to explore yourself and know what and how you feel good. What calms you down and makes your worst day end with a happy note, explore- you will get the answer. I got the answer. How unique we all are, but at a point we are very tangible. We have similar perceptions and similar beliefs. What we can do is we can work on some of our very strong negative beliefs into positive, like life is tough, mother in laws are difficult people, parenting is a tough job etc. These are some of our very strong negative beleifs, and even though life is good for you, your mother in law is a nice lady etc you will work according to your belief. These beliefs can’t be changed in a day but can be worked out to improve your life.
To change your strong negative belief a simple solution is flow downstream. Be with the flow, don’t be stubborn because of your beliefs and fight with the situation. Because flowing upstream will simply consume your strength and will fetch you nothing, but flowing downstream wouldn’t consume your energy and end your day very peacefully. For instance you struggle with your kid to do this, do that, like a pair of shoes, he want to wear blue and your want to make him wear red for some reason, you force him, struggle, and result is his tantrums and your frustration, what will happen if you make him wear shoe of his choice, your life will be easy and he will be calm, and don’t be bothered about the mouths who have a habit of pointing. Be with the flow and don’t be stringent with your rules, because rules are made to be broken.
Be your own boss, and don’t let others decide whether you should be happy or not.
Feel good.. Live Great.
We do a lot many things to look good, to appeal good… but do all these work when you don’t feel good.
Ya, Depression: a very common problem with women, to almost each and every woman whether she is working or a house wife. It’s a fact that after crossing an age of 25, women are twice more prone to depressive disorders then men. But the irony is, the cause of depression is just nothing, its all because of not feeling good. The reasons can be many and they are all because of external factors, may be boss, mother in law, husband, or neighbour, kids etc. The reasons are many, but they all are silly, they occur because you are filled with so much of energy and you don’t get the right path to utilise it, and then it burst out in the form of depressions and blaming others for your problems.
The problem of depression and mood fluctuation affects more to those ladies who leave jobs for family as a sacrifice. It develops an empty space, which keeps hitting them when they see peer group and their achievements. Today I was attending a session in my child’s school about ‘secrets of childhood’ and there a mother suddenly burst into tears and reason she said that she is not happy. She was not happy with life, not with her relationship and about everything. She left job five months back for her kid as her mom was not able to take care of the child. She was so upset that she considered herself as bad mom and a loser. She blamed almost everybody for her problems but was unable to realise that problem is not ‘they’ its ‘I’. It’s very simple that when I don’t feel good, I can’t make others feel good.
We are born as quite emotional and soft personalities, and that’s why we are bothered more for others than for ourselves. But the truth is that we are solely responsible for our own selves. If you are not happy than how can you make others happy? And even if you try to make everyone happy then there will be atleast one being who is annoyed with you. When you are sad and depressed, because some xyz said something bad to you, don’t you think you gave Mr. xyz the power to rule your life and make you sad. The world is not your responsibility, be happy then your surrounding will automatically will be driving according to you. Keep power of your life with you and don’t let others to rule you.
To feel good, to fight your depressions and to remain happy you don’t need to do yoga, or some course or any such artificial thing which is suggested to you. We only know how we will feel good and nobody else, but we don’t have time to know How. Try to explore yourself and know what and how you feel good. What calms you down and makes your worst day end with a happy note, explore- you will get the answer. I got the answer. How unique we all are, but at a point we are very tangible. We have similar perceptions and similar beliefs. What we can do is we can work on some of our very strong negative beliefs into positive, like life is tough, mother in laws are difficult people, parenting is a tough job etc. These are some of our very strong negative beleifs, and even though life is good for you, your mother in law is a nice lady etc you will work according to your belief. These beliefs can’t be changed in a day but can be worked out to improve your life.
To change your strong negative belief a simple solution is flow downstream. Be with the flow, don’t be stubborn because of your beliefs and fight with the situation. Because flowing upstream will simply consume your strength and will fetch you nothing, but flowing downstream wouldn’t consume your energy and end your day very peacefully. For instance you struggle with your kid to do this, do that, like a pair of shoes, he want to wear blue and your want to make him wear red for some reason, you force him, struggle, and result is his tantrums and your frustration, what will happen if you make him wear shoe of his choice, your life will be easy and he will be calm, and don’t be bothered about the mouths who have a habit of pointing. Be with the flow and don’t be stringent with your rules, because rules are made to be broken.
Be your own boss, and don’t let others decide whether you should be happy or not.
Feel good.. Live Great.
September 15, 2009
Dangerous Expectation
Expectation, it’s the reason behind all the problems. The more you expect, be it from anybody, children, parents, employee, boss, spouse or anybody, the more upset you will be. This is because every human being is different; his capacity, needs and desires are different, so its not necessary that whatever we desire at a point of time will be fulfilled. Its traumatic for both, for the one who expects and whose expectation is unfulfilled, and from the one whom you expects, and cant fulfill the expectation, its sad for both. Expectation is the reason for all the depressions and tensions. Why is a life of a saint so peaceful and calm, because he doesn’t expect anything, he is a satisfied being.
Whenever we expect too much from ourselves we face depressions, anxiety, anger and other negative feelings, this is because each and every expectation can’t be fulfilled. Every desire has a limit, so hold your expectations to a limit. Once we understand how much we should expect from ourselves or from others, or if we lower or expectations, and try to be satisfied with what we have, instead of crying for what we lost or what we don’t have, we can never lead a happy and peaceful life.
“An incident happened with me when I was in 12th board, I was expecting 80-90% in my boards but scored only 75%, it was so traumatic for me, that I wasted 4-5 months in crying for what I lost, instead of trying for admission in good college. Because of that trauma I was forced to take admission in a so-so college.” I was so much confident for my result, which was not in my hands, that it shocked me badly. It was all because of my heavy expectations for my marks. It happens with almost 40% of students.
Don’t burry yourself under your own expectations, it will lead to nothing but frustrations. “A friend of mine liked someone, but due to some reasons couldn’t marry the guy of her choice, but had to marry somebody of her parent’s choice. The guy with whom she got married is far better than the one whom she chose to marry, but still she was upset. It was because she was expecting her husband to be like his boyfriend, but that was not possible. Her life became hell, she tried to run away. But later she understood that its of no use to cry for something that she doesn’t have, but she wasted three beautiful initial years of her marriage in quarrelling and crying”.
This all happens when we don’t justify our expectations. Sometimes we get better things than what we expected, but we don’t value those things, because we were expecting something else.
I believe that we should be very logical while expecting, and shouldn’t involve our heart and soul for any expectation, because these dangerous expectation leads to nowhere, but frustrations.
Whenever we expect too much from ourselves we face depressions, anxiety, anger and other negative feelings, this is because each and every expectation can’t be fulfilled. Every desire has a limit, so hold your expectations to a limit. Once we understand how much we should expect from ourselves or from others, or if we lower or expectations, and try to be satisfied with what we have, instead of crying for what we lost or what we don’t have, we can never lead a happy and peaceful life.
“An incident happened with me when I was in 12th board, I was expecting 80-90% in my boards but scored only 75%, it was so traumatic for me, that I wasted 4-5 months in crying for what I lost, instead of trying for admission in good college. Because of that trauma I was forced to take admission in a so-so college.” I was so much confident for my result, which was not in my hands, that it shocked me badly. It was all because of my heavy expectations for my marks. It happens with almost 40% of students.
Don’t burry yourself under your own expectations, it will lead to nothing but frustrations. “A friend of mine liked someone, but due to some reasons couldn’t marry the guy of her choice, but had to marry somebody of her parent’s choice. The guy with whom she got married is far better than the one whom she chose to marry, but still she was upset. It was because she was expecting her husband to be like his boyfriend, but that was not possible. Her life became hell, she tried to run away. But later she understood that its of no use to cry for something that she doesn’t have, but she wasted three beautiful initial years of her marriage in quarrelling and crying”.
This all happens when we don’t justify our expectations. Sometimes we get better things than what we expected, but we don’t value those things, because we were expecting something else.
I believe that we should be very logical while expecting, and shouldn’t involve our heart and soul for any expectation, because these dangerous expectation leads to nowhere, but frustrations.
July 14, 2009
In search of Serenity!!!
My Life keeps on surprising me. I was searching for serenity, doing yoga, pooja, walks and what not . But still mind is not calm, its in search of something, is it serenity or my aim in life. Why am i born.. What is that purpose for which god made me.. There might be some work which has to be done by me, and could be done only by me.
God has decided something for each one of us, and we all keep on searching for that "what". What for, are we made for? What is the Real aim of our lives. If I'll get the answer to this question, "what is the purpose of my life?" my search of serenity will be complete.
God has decided something for each one of us, and we all keep on searching for that "what". What for, are we made for? What is the Real aim of our lives. If I'll get the answer to this question, "what is the purpose of my life?" my search of serenity will be complete.
