Shaikh Ashraf's Blog: Shaikh Ashraf Writes, page 2

Pain

Pain, is the deep rooted tragedy,
Making me go insane,
This mundane, and thwarting desires pull me off reality,
I am in love with reality.

The deep tragedy, grows in like a virus,
And you keep become something of a monster inside,
There is a great divide between your morals and your actions,
That you surprise yourself and hurt others.

This deep rooted tragedy has gain it’s water,
You’ve water the seeds and let it grow,
And now you bow to it, as it keeps you dependent,
But, you wonder how are you gonna pull this pain out and live independent.

The tragedy lurks behind you, making you sleepless,
Making you joyless, insane, little do you know,
That you’ve turned into a monster,
Chewing it’s grouts at people,
Resenting their lives,
This world,
This reality.

Then one particular day, something or the new drug called love comes,
Fills you with love and eradicates the pain,
But you’re too stupid to let love in,
Love is a poison,
It seeps inside, and grows,
You feel loved, taken cared of,
Then this wild virus, seeped into your soul, heart and mind,
Takes over you and this is the new pain in your life.

Monsters you’ve become, letting love and pain in your heart and veins,
Monsters, you’ve become chewing your resentment and cruelty to the world,
Monsters we are punishing the world for our heartbreaks,
Let go, remain unattached, don’t let pain, love, or any other thing enter.

© Ashraf Shaikh

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Darkness

Darkness lurks in the shadows,
The shadows where memories were alive,
Prisoning me into them,
Shattering my dream.

It is the past that pulls me back,
Makes me string along with you,
It is the moments I’ve spent,
Those are also the moments I despise the most.

Darkness jerks my dreams and aspirations away,
I murk on the mundane life,
As it twerks and throttles on my mind,
Nothing can I do but focus on my grind.

You’ve been an important person,
But heartbreaks, teach you, you weren’t that important,
Heartbreak thought me, love isn’t real,
But what’s real is pain, agony and frustration.

While I look up at the sky, on top of the mountain,
Achieving and becoming what I wanted, I wonder whether you’re there on the corner, to hold my hand and walk with me.

I know that ain’t happening,
I know, you’re the darkness, your memories were the darkness, your love was the darkness, that kept holding me, pulling me back, to you,
You’re the monster that latches into me, and shakes my foundation.

I don’t give a damn,
I don’t want you,
Go to hell,
But, where will you go, I live in the same hell day in and out.

I live in the same hell, when the darkness of past, lurks and jerks over me,
Splatters and shatters my life away,
Even if I am on top of the mountain, achieved and satisfied in life,
I want to go back to reality.

Reality where your pain, made me a man,
Your heartbreak, your not loving me,
Filled me, and gave me clarity,
And I become what I wanted to.

People say, hate is a negative force,
I say, you can turn it into positive one.

© Ashraf Shaikh

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Love Is Poison

Drop by drop the pain flows out,
Dribbling in red, it swirls out,
Dark red colour of pain, making me insane,
As I slit, the blade, down the wrists.

Every memory hidden in dark labyrinths, rises,
Reminding me of you,
Every moment life has been bad, I recall your face,
But now, it is a demise of the sad life.

Demise of the love that never was between us,
Demise of whatever lies and truth you told, that were lies,
Demise of you, your memories,
But why do I slit my wrist to forget you,
When I haven’t done anything wrong.

Love, is in actuality a poison,
From deep down rises all those passions,
When I see you, I want to thwart that face and end my misery,
You might be thinking why all this hate.

The man who has the capability of loving the most,
Loving you, the deepest, with his truer self,
Is also the man who can be the most resentful bastard,
Still you ask, why all this hate?

Well wait, let me get my life on track,
Well wait, let me make my dreams come true,
You’ll be coming back to me, like it always happens,
But as the blood dribbles out,
Leaving ne dry of everything,
The pain and agony leaves and rushes out,
I black out and I see only darkness.

© Ashraf Shaikh

Reflections Of The Mirror

When I opened my eyes they met you,
And I found myself in the ocean of darkness,
Where love was buried under your eyes,
But buried also your pains and agonies.

When I jolt my eyes open,
I felt broken and shaken,
To the truth that I see,
You love someone else and yet, I believe my chance will come soon.

My belief betrays me,
I live my life with a lie,
I cry I wail, I write and sing,
Only to see the truth that was already in front of me.

I fooled myself into loving you,
I fooled my soul away,
Broke my weakling heart and shook my soul in a day,
Now, I’m too scared to get it broken again.

I’m too scared of loving again,
This heart and soul is not that strong,
This person loves himself too much,
I see my reflection in the mirror,
I reincarnate myself.

Not to love someone too deeply,
Not to fool myself,
Only tell me the truth,
But, I don’t recognize my reflection in the mirror.
© Ashraf Shaikh

Reflections In The Mirror

Burned them up in the fire,
I threw away my desires,
I ignited the flame,
Here, no one’s to blame.

Buried them in the grave,
For whom you thought I was brave,
Yet, I am a nobody but a failed lover,
Who searches his soul to cover.

Thrashed them in the ashtray,
Prodded to the burning point,
Here on I lit the joint,
Smoke away my worries, drink the wounds pint by pint.

Slashed the identities that ruled me,
Told me sad stories about me,
Slit my body open and became,
Someone else.

I don’t recognize the person in the mirror,
I don’t antagonize the person in the mirror,
I don’t relate to the person in the mirror,
Cause he’s long gone, forgotten, in a rotten world,
Now, I reincarnated, to live, the life without whatever my reflection lived through.

I reincarnated to not love someone to deep,
So that I lay awake by the night,
Under the sky full of shining stars, only to weep,
I swept away the older me,
Now, I’m incapable of love,
Incapable of loving too much,
Getting hurt too much,
I reincarnated from my reflections,
But, I do not recognize them when I see the mirror.
© Ashraf Shaikh

Strings Of A Guitar

Like Strings, I strike my fingers in your skin,
Like the guitar, you wail and make me sail the oceans of love,
Like, the symphony of a beautiful orchestra your voice sounds,
Like a painful song, you growl in the pains of love.

Under the dark sky,
With the shining moon,
Like a nightingale, you look,
Like a burned soldier I arrived at the doorstep of your heart.

Listening to your voice,
With the demise of my soul,
I stand near your heart and scowl,
Only to strike the strings of your skin like the strings of a guitar and make you sing.

Like a sweet orchestra, you sound,
My soul hits the ground,
I was lost but now I found,
My salvation in your heart.

Like the strings of a guitar,
My fingers strike on your skin,
And you moan and growl,
Scowl and frown, and make me feel alive.

You’re an instrument I’d like to play,
You’re that singer I’d to compose,
You’re that lover I’d like to impose with the crime of breaking apart,
I’d like to imprison you in the cave of my heart,
Where you’ll be the only prisoner.
© Ashraf Shaikh

Khushbu

You don’t express or say that much, 
Nor do you express what’s in your heart, 

You are tasting the moon far above the sky, 
Gave me the image that you’re seeking something,
Staring at the great moon, 
Your eyes tell you, need, you demand something. 

What is it that hides inside you?
What is it that quiet and restrained inside you, 
Or You’re the moon,  magnificent in the sky, 
The dearer I get to you, you’re rather unique. 

The things you hide about you, 
Despite knowing you for years, you’re yet a stranger, 
Despite spending time with you, 
You’re still something, I wish to learn further. 

You’re a challenge, for me, 
To burst free and see and read what’s inside you,
You’re that character of my novel, that is opaque, 
You’re that novel, untold, 
Unspoken, unsaid. 

What are you, a novel?
A character who knows secrets?
An untold tale? 
Or, you’re a moon, large, and holding tall in the sky, 
But the further I try to appreciate you, the dearer I grow, too,
The mysteries of emotions, 
Hollow feelings, 
Underlying dreams inside you. 

Any quick story I write for you, 
Any novel or poetry, 
Would be insufficient,
Would be dishonesty to me as a writer, as a storyteller,
Because you’re higher than a story, 
Higher than a novel,
Higher than, a character in my novel,
You’re higher than a word, 
Or a sentence, 
Or a paragraph, 
You’re are higher than everything else in this universe of dreams, 
When you seek at the sky, beaming the moon with your luscious greedy eyes, 
Despite a thousand thoughts in my mind, 
I steal an eye inside your heavenly eyes only to get lost, 
To left stranded in the desert, or sea called your eyes, 
Wherein lies a thousand untold tales, 
A thousand untold, unsaid, things about you, that you know, and you keep it to yourself, 
Despite knowing you for all these years, 
You’re yet a mystery to me, 
Like a moon, which is even a mystery to me. 

Who are you then?
© Ashraf Shaikh

Hash Of Love

Something left unsaid,
Things stayed a mystery,
Your silence haunts me still,
Your presence still gives me a thrill.

Something left unspoken,
The words of wisdom and the language of love,
The song of love,
The play of passion,
Still burned, still played in our veins,
But, they were unspoken.

You left me on the crowded street,
Where I met everyone and let them greet,
I searched for you everywhere I went,
But, the world bent over,
I met at a thin line of dreams and reality.

The reality was harsh,
Thrashed my dreams and rasped away my breath,
The sword of it struck my soul,
Here on I growl in the dark pit of my grave.

My lover said, “I’m brave”
I don’t know, lying in the grave, coming close to reality,
I met the gods of love,
One of them was you.

You imprisoned me in your prison called love,
I ended up with depression of the spell called love,
There you cast that magic spell,
Swell and eat away my body,
Munch away your lust, your thirst,
As my veins burst thrashed,
Washed away my love for you.

It’s like hash,
You’re that stash,
That lights on fire and shows me a thousand dreams,
But when it comes down,
Of the belittle frowned high,
I open my eyes and don’t recognize….myself.

© Ashraf Shaikh

In The Midst

In the midst of everything I search you,
While I yearn you,
Where are you my heart calls,
I’m lost in you, while searching for the true, you.

In the midst of this night,
Lighting this joint, I tracing your body,
You sit here uptight, and I go right, inside,
With desire you melt me down, with fervour you take me in.

You suck me into the deep pit,
Where I lost everything and gained my grit,
You wobble me in the happy pain,
I throbble you in the mirrored moans.

I’m lost inside you, the deeper I go,
I’m walking in the desert searching water for my parched throat,
I’m roaming the desires, sucking me inside, grappling me with pain,
I’m not me, you’re not you,
We’re different beings,
Exploring ourselves deep,
Sucking inside, we weep.

© Ashraf Shaikh

Ravenous Monster

The more I take you in,
The more I want to remain inside you,
The more I explore you,
The deeper I want to dive into you.

The more I embrace you,
The more I want to,
The more I trace your body with my fingers,
The more I want to devour you.

I devour you,
Like a ravenous monster,
While you relish me,
Like a saint worshipping it’s god.

I yearn and lust you,
Like a hungry devil,
While you deliciously bring me all the passions, I missed.
Our loves are different.

I crave you from the deepest of my heart,
Then lust you from the deepest of my carnality,
I drink you from the squirming well,
While you wail in irresistible desire.

We eat from the delicious well of carnality,
We dance in the deliciousness,
We squirm and wiggle,
We moan and groan in the passionate ravening of our bodies.

We’re but monsters to each other,
Snatching our bodies away from us,
To get inside one another,
To remain someone else,
To live in someone else’s body.

But this ravening never ends,
This food never finishes,
This hunger never stops,
We’re addicted to our bodies.

Now again we trace our bodies with your fingers,
And raven again like a monster,
Now again we dance and squirm and wail and moan,
Again like a monster.

© Ashraf Shaikh

[image error]From Poison of Passion – A Poetry Collection