Jonathan L. Howard's Blog, page 13

My tweets

Tue, 12:04 : "Jocko Homo" by @DEVO performed as an 8 bit chiptune, sung by a vocaloid. Bugger me, is it the future already? http://t.co/VEsT194e Tue, 13:16 : @monstroso There were some rumours that "Casino Royale" (2006) would be a period piece. Do you think that could have worked? #BondTweets Tue, 14:18 : Strange but True: "Forever Autumn" from "Jeff Wayne's War of the Worlds" originally saw life as music for a Lego ad in 1969. Tue, 21:32 : I had no idea that there was a third series of "A Bit of Fry & Laurie" 20 years ago, nor how I missed it. Seeing it for the first time. Wed, 00:33 : Over at @RantingDragon #KatyasWorld is in the top 25 most anticipated SFF releases for November, which is nice. http://t.co/PQckRo7X

My tweets

Mon, 14:41 : @JamesThorne2 Ye gods, you unfollowed me. You bounder. I shall expect satisfaction at your earliest convenience, sir. Mon, 15:19 : RT @mattstaggs: Sea lice mob devours pig from the inside out http://t.co/HehbGdzn Mon, 15:20 : Interesting bit of footage, that pig being devoured by sea lice. Skeletonised inside a week. Hmm. (Makes a note). Mon, 16:04 : How is Frankie Boyle's character worth �54k? How? Mon, 19:00 : RT @AnneBillson: Watch these 2� minutes of INSANE Vorkapich montage at the start of CRIME WITHOUT PASSION (1934): https://t.co/nQAqp9Al ... Tue, 08:27 : RT @BookZone: On The Book Zone: Review of Katya's World by @JonathanLHoward http://t.co/C1aSDnac @strangechem Tue, 08:44 : RT @smavincent: If we don't dismantle the BBC and the NHS immediately, there's no telling where dead paedophile Jimmy Savile could strik ... Tue, 09:34 : RT @gralefrit: Touching last moment from "Pages From Ceefax" http://t.co/o46RBAG2 Tue, 09:56 : RT @MrsSteveOBrien: The Independent show off their killer film knowledge: http://t.co/6vI4NfmI Tue, 10:41 : RT @AnneBillson: Blimey, Martin Short is Clare's cousin! http://t.co/11hZymIo Tue, 11:04 : RT @mattleys: Oh dear, I don't think @cdr_james_bond is having a very good morning http://t.co/iQPGaSxV Tue, 11:38 : Stabby things, I tell ye. Stabby things. </lj-cu

My tweets

Sun, 12:41 : RT @zora_db: The #colinthology is now on sale. Stories from @starainboy, @tuaththua, @jonathanlhoward, @klingonguy and more http://t.co/ ... Sun, 12:46 : Three quid for 21 pieces of new fiction, proceeds go to charity. C'mon, that's a pretty sweet deal: http://t.co/yCc5WqpI #Colinthology Sun, 15:00 : What's this? Why, could it be a UK release copy of "Katya's World"? (Yes) http://t.co/5q3cn5QN Sun, 15:11 : RT @KimKierkegaard: Italy is so beautiful. I have fallen into a brutish, animal stupor that gapes at existence. Best birthday ever!!! Sun, 16:59 : . @ForbiddenPlanet had managed to lay in a few pre-release copies of #KatyasWorld , which sold out with encouraging alacrity. Sun, 17:52 : Yesterday morning in Bristol, I heard a distant emergency vehicle blip its siren, echoing around the buildings. My first thought? Martians. Sun, 17:56 : RT @HadleyFreeman: In Pippa Middleton's book there is a recipe for roasted marshmallows and instructions on how to play conkers. She got ... Sun, 20:44 : @AckAckMacaque Just watching the "Monkey Magic" movie. Monkey's vain, loud, and not very bright. Found myself thinking of you. Fancy. Sun, 23:02 : RT @HenriLeChatNoir: It is rare to see the precise moment when innocence is stripped away and reality is revealed. http://t.co/zzJoeAgz Mon, 08:08 : Want to know why ebooks on Amazon UK sometimes seem remarkably expensive? http://t.co/zYi81UCY Mon, 09:36 : RT @monstroso: Allowing Trump to build a golf course & resort on pristine dunes & kick out locals in the process is a (Scottish) ... Mon, 09:41 : Dear me, the number of people I didn't get around to saying hello to @BristolCon My apologies, no snubs intended. Mon, 10:11 : Perhaps I might write an erotic novel for #NaNoWriMo this year. Scared? You bloody well should be. Mon, 10:43 : I've written novels more quickly than this blasted short story. #GlacialProgress Mon, 10:54 : New and lovely silliness over at the Johannes Cabal Tumblr: http://t.co/Xr7iS8kW Mon, 11:09 : Well, Amazon UK is just covering itself with glory recently: http://t.co/vRAGuCVt ( via @evbjone )

My tweets

Sat, 17:30 : Had my first panel. I suspect I was slightly crap, but the rest of the panel were good, so a net plus, I think. Sat, 20:31 : The reading went well. I was very slightly drunk, which helped. Sat, 21:27 : Heading for home. Been a great day at @BristolCon . Much awesomeness. Sat, 21:30 : @ForbiddenPlanet had managed to lay in a few pre-release copies of #KatyasWorld , which sold out with encouraging alacrity. Sat, 23:36 : RT @cstross: Romney-owned firm buys co. that owns the Ohio voting machines: http://t.co/BZVncByD Sun, 10:02 : To folk who have recently followed me: Greetings! To folk who have recently unfollowed me: Good. I didn't like you anyway. And you smelled. Sun, 10:18 : RT @timmaughan: Mr @garethlpowell and @ackackmacaque #bristolcon @ Ramada Bristol City http://t.co/FQV0Fuuk

My tweets

Fri, 17:01 : Time to pause and consider the eternal questions of life. Why does no bugger seem to stock Banana Nesquik? Fri, 17:40 : @GailSimone "We win," said the cockroach. #FiveWordStories Fri, 17:54 : Okay, last call (from me) about #BristolCon tomorrow. I'll be there, spoiling it for everyone. Be there or be saved. http://t.co/DNTvQv7k Fri, 19:19 : Some days you reread your current work and think to yourself... Fri, 19:19 : "That SEEMS pretty good, but I have a suspicion I may be insane, and have only written 'dog dicks' several thousand times." Sat, 09:39 : RT @aspicelilia: @JonathanLHoward Theatre of Love. Vincent Price thanks everyone with gift baskets for their constructive criticism. #bo ... Sat, 09:54 : George Osborne: "We're all in this together. As long as 'this' isn't Standard Class, obviously."

My tweets

Thu, 12:05 : RT @AnneBillson: Goodbye Emmanuelle... RIP Sylvia Kristel. (When I posted the Gainsbourg/Emmanuelle a short while ago, I had no idea...) ... Thu, 12:23 : Twitter suggests that I should follow Johann Hari. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah. No. Thu, 14:14 : RT @strangechem: "Howard’s creation is one of a kind" - a fantastic review of Katya's World by @JonathanLHoward http://t.co/TVTRDU2c Tha ... Thu, 14:15 : RT @gbevin: Don't know much about politics, but this is funny http://t.co/y8veJt0X Thu, 18:31 : Why did these never turn up on CD? Michael Hordern reading M.R. James; it really doesn't get much better than that. http://t.co/skTJH0vD Thu, 21:26 : Misread "Victoria Beckham in Chanel's House" as "Victoria Beckham in Charnel House." Lost interest as soon as I realised my error. Fri, 08:02 : Sore #boringhorrormovies Fri, 08:05 : Frankenstein Created Moomin #boringhorrormovies Fri, 08:38 : My Twitter timeline has been silent for 4 whole minutes. The only possible conclusion -- everybody's dead. I'm the last surviving human. Fri, 08:39 : I must tweet about it #SoleSurvivor Fri, 11:35 : RT @mrchrisaddison: Hospitality, Thick of It style: http://t.co/0gN4yXT5 Fri, 11:38 : The Adorable Dr Phibes #boringhorrormovies

My tweets

Wed, 13:21 : RT @bobbylennox: I do like the humour of this bus used for a rail replacement service at Glasgow Central. http://t.co/4ZKhq1rb Thu, 08:43 : Police tase blind man after mistaking his white stick for a katana: http://t.co/r07kozYX Words fail me. Thu, 11:15 : Mmmm, jonesin' for a bibliophilia fix. Ooh, yeah... http://t.co/caPKJck5 That's the stuff.

My tweets

Tue, 14:27 : New blog post about @BristolCon this Saturday and what I'll be doing to drag the tone down. http://t.co/DNTvQv7k Tue, 15:16 : I can't remember the last time I saw a full gasometer. Are they an obsolete technology now? http://t.co/6Na0RDID Tue, 17:43 : @onabicyclefor2 Are you coming to BristolCon? I'm not sure how close Bikini Bottom is to Bristol. Tue, 18:20 : RT @RobHBedford: My review of another winner from @strangechem KATYA'S WORLD by @JonathanLHoward: http://t.co/WX66gydO Tue, 19:37 : Won't be able to go to this year's Boring Conference. The talk on shop fronts looked so deliciously stultifying, too. http://t.co/ZpZ3V2w3 Tue, 19:38 : RT @WstonesOxfordSt: EXCLUSIVE: The Man Booker Prize has been awarded to the feeling of loneliness you get at 4am when you question all ... Tue, 21:04 : Just watched Svankmajer's "Alice" for the umpty-umpth time. First time in original Czech with subtitles, though. Tue, 23:14 : RT @jeremyduns: Watching a documentary on the Battle of Crete. 'It was really a Heath Robinson affair'. Swedish subtitle: 'Det var en Ma ... Wed, 08:05 : RT @PeterMannionMP: Q: How do we get assault weapons off the streets? Both: Oh look, over there, a squirrel... #debate Wed, 08:49 : RT @TwopTwips: WHEN the barista at Starbucks asks for your name, simply reply TAX PAYING BRITISH CITIZEN. (via @shaunwkeaveny) Wed, 08:52 : RT @Richard_Kadrey: Suck it, steampunks. This guy is building a real airship house. http://t.co/IxcGzfk9 Wed, 08:54 : If I had an airship house like that, I'd call it the Albatross and use it to bomb London's docks. I'm very traditional at heart. Wed, 09:06 : RT @TheBlackBoxClub: Peter Cushing and Dave Prowse: Grand Moff Tarkin and Darth Vader: 'STAR WARS' (1977) http://t.co/4wtffNLs Wed, 09:07 : Hadn't really thought about it previously, but Cushing and Prowse had acted together in a couple of Frankenstein films a few years before.

BristolCon 2012

Woo, lookit, a non-Twitter entry. 



Anyway, BristolCon 2012 is happening this Saturday the 20th and I shall be doing stuff at it. Specifically: 

14:00-14:45 -- I shall be signing books in Programme Room 1. They may even be my own. I am told there will be copies of Katya's World available, over a fortnight before they're due in the shops. I should have a few myself, but Forbidden Planet in the traders' rooms should have some if all goes to plan. There will also be copies of the Cabal novels for sale. 

15:00-15:45 -- I'll be appearing again in Programme Room 1 on the Women in Sensible Armour panel along with Danie Ware, Joanne Hall, and Foz Meadows, and moderated by the legendary (and terribly dapper) Philip Reeve. I've ranted about stupid fantasy armour on Twitter a few times in the past, so I'm there as the token outraged male, I think (Mr Reeve doesn't count. He's there to moderate and is therefore above us as Asgard is above Midgard). 

17:50-17:55 -- A reading, once more in Programme Room 1. No idea what, yet. It's only five minutes, so I'm fretting a bit over what's short and punchy enough for that. 

19:00-19:45 -- Just across the hall in Programme Room 2 for another panel. This one is Nano or Nono, How to Survive a Writing Challenge, about the rigours of things like NaNoWriMo, and whether they're a sensible thing to do or a mistake. Ben Jeapes will be moderating that one, with Dolly Garland, Joanne Hall, Leigh Kennedy, and myself doing the panelling. 

I should also point out that at 18:00-18:45 in Programme Room 1 there will be a thing in memory of "Ghost of Honour" Colin Harvey, who died last year. The hope is that an anthology Colinthology will be launched then, all profits going to the hospital charity that Colin worked for. This won't be a morbid affair; that's really not the sort of chap he was by all accounts and he wouldn't have wanted that. I have a story in Colinthology. It's set in a bar. The editors tell me a sod of a lot of the stories are set in bars and pubs and there is a lot of beer involved. That's what Colin would have wanted. 

Anyway, if you're in that neck of the woods, at least consider it. It's £20 for a full day's serious fun (and a goody bag), which is a bloody good deal, I think. Hope to see you there. 

JLH

My tweets

Mon, 12:07 : I shall be endeavouring to be entertaining on a couple of panels and for a reading this Saturday at @BristolCon http://t.co/9Thf9JdJ Mon, 12:26 : I seem to be stuck in '77. The theme to "Murder Most English" keeps running around my head. http://t.co/WioZToP0 Mon, 15:28 : Nothing like doing a back-up that you've been putting off to remind you why back-ups tend to be put off. They're interminable. Mon, 19:53 : A strange woman is dying and wants to give me $12,000,000.00 because God told her to. Already planning how I'm going to spend it. #NotAScam Mon, 20:32 : Love how @Spotify gets confused when tracks have the same name. Pretty sure OMD's "Locomotion" never asked anyone to swing their hips, baby. Mon, 20:58 : Halfway down, I like to think Felix Baumgartner suddenly thought, "Oh, bugger. Did I remember to lock the door after me?" Mon, 21:45 : There's a book I've really wanted to write for years. I won't be able to write it for another year because I'm scheduled solid. Frustrating. Tue, 08:38 : Iceberg Ink review "Katya's World": http://t.co/0Gc8jLdB Tue, 08:57 : Oh, man. Just heard that Mike Singleton of "Lords of Midnight" fame died a few days ago: http://t.co/aRXXYKVl Tue, 09:01 : Story idea. Vampire and zombie fall in love, have BDSM relationship, have zompire child, travels in time, bites Jane Austen etc etc etc Tue, 11:35 : Wracking my brain to decide what to read at @BristolCon. Cabal or Katya or something else? Whatever it is, it will only be about 750 words. Tue, 11:49 : RT @trevorbaxendale: What I think we really need is a novelisation of Prometheus by Terrance Dicks. Tue, 11:50 : RT @EugeneByrne: Bloggery. Mixed-race American claiming to be the world's fattest woman was buried in Bristol in 1920. http://t.co/myldA4nt