Pam Moore's Blog, page 14

Featured Fit Mom: Mandi Castle

I am thrilled to have had the chance to interview Mandi Castle for the second installment of my new series, where I interview moms with big, scary, sexy fitness goals. Mandi is a 37 year-old married mom of two, ages five and nine, living in Dallas. She recently published her first novel, Dear Stephanie, (which btw, I cannot wait to read. It looks sexy, suspenseful, and totally compelling). She blogs at Cellulite Looks Better Tan, and you can also find her on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, and Pinterest.

Mandi Castle, author of Dear Stephanie, mother of two, and fitness enthusiast

Mandi got her six-back back after having two kids- and she’s maintained it. When I found out about Mandi’s strong core, I was inspired, but but after she answered my questions, I was seriously blown away. Her level of commitment is insane, in a good way. It is embarrassing how often I’ve found myself wondering, “What would Mandi do?” lately. Here is the inside scoop on just what it takes to get and keep killer abs. As Mandi explains, it’s not a simple case of good genes or luck. It’s work and it’s a choice that she makes every single day.

Here is the inside scoop on just what it takes to get and keep killer abs.
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But it’s worth it. Mandi says she feels better when she exercises and she loves her body not just for how it looks (and it looks good!), but for what it does. I love that.

Mandi Castle worked hard- and re-commits every single day – for her fit, beautiful, post-baby body.

PM: Tell me a bit about your background as an athlete, pre-kids.

MC: I have always been athletic. I grew up playing outside and rode my bike everywhere. In the summer, my street was where kids played. We had basketball tournaments that went on for days, and when we were sick of basketball, we had wiffle ball tournaments. I rarely went inside.

PM: In what ways (if any) did your fitness routine change after having children?

MC: I knew right away that I wanted to “get back in shape” after having each baby. With my first, I started working out at six weeks. My sister-in-law was a fitness coach for Strollerfit, so I enrolled and started as soon as my doctor released me. Once I completed that course, I made going to the gym part of my routine. With my second child, I slowly started back to the gym. I would do 15 minutes on the elliptical machine and almost die. I hate cardio. I added five minutes at a time. When I could go 45 minutes, I knew I could go back to my cardio core class, and I’ve been going to that two to three times a week since then.

PM: Where do you work out? Has that changed since becoming a mom?

MC: I have been a member at the same gym for fourteen years. My rates are cheap, so I’ll never leave, and they offer childcare. They don’t allow babies under six months of age, so that was a challenge when my second child came along. I left her with her dad to work out at the gym, and when he was unavailable, I worked out from home. There are great workout videos online, and I found some that worked for me.

PM: I know your goal was to bring your six-pack back. I am assuming diet played a major role in getting there and maintaining it. Can you tell me what a normal day of eating looks like for you?

MC: I have one major rule I rarely break. I do not eat after 8:00 PM. I also skip breakfast. Some call it Intermittent fasting. I usually do not eat from 8:00 pm until around 12:00 pm the next day. I exercise in the mornings (usually at 10:30), so I eat as soon as I finish my workout. I’ve never been a breakfast eater anyway, so it wasn’t a difficult decision for me. Having said that, I’m pretty strict with what I will eat, and I eat a lot during my “eating” hours.

I try to eat mostly vegetables, some meat, and some carbs. I like to have fish at least twice a week. For lunch, I tend to eat protein and vegetables, so a typical lunch for me is tuna with spinach or a veggie omelet. Dinners are usually my biggest meal, where I add the carbs. I am not a dieter. I just choose healthy food. I drink water more than anything else. I probably drink a minimum of 96 oz of water a day.

I’m not always good. I love tacos and cheeseburgers and pizza. I still drink coffee with creamer (I won’t give that up), and I allow myself something if I want it. I refuse to do a “you can’t have this” diet, so I will eat chocolate, but instead of having a full candy bar, I go for a bite sized one. Sugar is my biggest weakness, and on days when I’m less strict, I can put down some chocolate. I usually will work extra hard at the gym the next day if I’ve allowed myself to “cheat” on healthy eating. I’m also much less strict on the weekends. This is now though, that I’ve met my goals. When I was working toward these goals, I was very strict. Very little sugar, very little carbs, lots of protein, no unhealthy snacks, no drinking alcohol. I drink an occasional glass of wine during the week, and I’ll let myself have beer on the weekend. I think what works best is the rule: everything in moderation. But if you want to LOSE weight, you have to stay out of the fridge and the pantry. That’s the first trick.

PM: What motivates you to work out?

MC: I love my body. I like what I see in the mirror, so I want to maintain it. Of course, the health benefits are also a huge motivator. It’s funny. I eat healthier when I work out. I sleep better when I work out. I am in a better mood when I work out. Exercise is no joke. When your body is healthy, everything else seems to be as well.

Exercise is no joke. @MandiCastle
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PM: How to you stay motivated even on days when you don’t feel like it (not interested, too tired, time-crunched, etc)?

MC: I never actually WANT to go to the gym. Like anyone, I can come up with a thousand better things to do with my time. I remember when I was writing my book, I would be in the middle of a really great scene, and my alarm would go off to leave for the gym. I hated to stop, but it never fails. I always feel so much better after a good workout, so I go. At least three times a week.

PM: When do you work out? How do you fit it in to your schedule? 

MC: My typical routine was:

Monday: Thirty minutes of basketball (just shooting, not full court playing) one hour of PIYO (a combination of yoga and pilates)

Tuesday: core workout at home (crunches, burpees, planks)

Wednesday: Thirty minutes of basketball (same as above) One hour of cardio core (pilates on speed)|

Thursday: leg workout at home (squats, lunges, donkey kicks)

Friday: Thirty minutes of basketball (same as above) One hour of cardio core

Saturday: one hour of yoga

I started working full time (after nine years of being a stay at home mom) in December. This was the biggest challenge for me. Before, I usually spent two hours at the gym, and that didn’t include the 15 minutes it took to drive each way and check the child into childcare, so making time to exercise was a must.

I fit it in. I work from home, so I spend my lunch breaks at the gym. I do online classes. I sit on a stability ball at my desk (it makes me keep my core engaged all day long). I walk as much as I can and climb as many stairs as I can. And every chance I get, I go to my classes. I usually get to at least two a week.

PM:What were your biggest barriers to achieving your goal and how did you overcome them?

MC: At the beginning, the biggest barrier was the sheer fact that it seemed impossible. I had a lot of flab after my baby, and my body did not bounce back. Every time I looked in the mirror, I could say “You’ll never make it,” or “You got this!” I chose “You got this!” It was a lot of work and it took a lot of will to achieve my goal, but accomplishment feels so much better than failure.

I could say “You’ll never make it,” or “You got this!” I chose “You got this!” @MandiCastle
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PM: How old were your kid(s) when you achieved your goal?

MC: With my son (my first), I think he was about eighteen months. I have a picture of us on the beach, and you can see my abs. It took longer with my daughter. I didn’t drop my last 10 pounds of baby weight until she was close to two years old.

PM: How has your fitness routine changed (if at all) since you met your goal? 

MC: It hasn’t changed. I have to maintain. If I slip even for a week, I can see a noticeable difference.

PM: What advice would you give women who are intimidated to set a big, scary, sexy post-baby fitness goal?

MC: You can do this. You have to make a commitment to change. You can’t JUST exercise or JUST eat healthy. You have to do both, and you have to have realistic expectations. I don’t think weight matters. I think the most important thing for all of us is to like ourselves, our bodies. Be proud of what we have done but also what we are capable of doing. We made babies. We are superheroes. Who says we can’t look like them?

We made babies. We are superheroes. @MandiCastle
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Some of Mandi’s Faves

Pre-workout fuel: Er..coffee?

Post-workout meal/indulgence: My favorite lunch is tuna mixed with boiled egg and mayo over spinach leaves. I probably eat that two or three times a week.

Training resources: I love the Beachbody PIYO workouts. My instructor at my gym is Melissa McAlister, and she has a demo on YouTube that is a great start. If you like a good impact workout, there are PIYO dvd’s available online.

Favorite music to listen to when you’re working out: Pop upbeat top 40 stuff. I have Kesha on my workout playlist and Kanye West. Don’t hate me. [Pam’s note: I don’t! I play Katie Perry when I teach spin class!]

Thank you, Mandi for giving us the real deal on what it takes to get and maintain your toned abs. Whether your goal is a six-pack or not, Mandi’s story is a great reminder that over time, consistent hard work and dedication pay off.

Are you a mom who has achieved a big, scary, sexy fitness goal?
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Are you a mom who has achieved a big, scary, sexy fitness goal? I want to hear about it! If your goal was daunting at first and made you feel like a rock star when you met it, then it’s big, scary, and sexy enough for me. Click here to get in touch and talk about being part of this series.

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Things You Consider Normal When Your Kid Has Food Allergies

Lady Bug was diagnosed with food allergies exactly a year ago. Right after we got the diagnosis, I freaked out. A lot. As a person who is prone to eating random stuff that I find, I can only hope my daughter doesn’t take after me. Though it’s still too early to tell exactly what kind of person she’ll be, I’m not holding my breath. I might have put my tongue in her mouth yesterday in a panicked attempt to taste whether she’d secretly eaten an allergen. And I might have done it without stopping to wonder what laws I was breaking or how I was going to explain to my four year-old that the means more than justified the ends, but only in this one very specific circumstance. I am up on Scary Mommy today with a list of 17 things you think are normal when your kid has food allergies, (French kissing your toddler would be #18.) Click here to read the full post.

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My Hierarchy of Needs

I don’t think dirt cheap babysitting is included anywhere on Maslow’s hierarchy of human needs, but for stay-at-home/freelance writer moms, I believe it should be. I’ve been leaving my 20 month old, (aka Lady Bug) in the care of my gym’s daycare for months and I give that situation most of the credit for my writing and my sanity. Lady Bug has serious food allergies. I love my gym’s daycare in part because they do not allow food. That makes it possible for me to relax while she’s there. Recently, there was talk of a change in the policy. I wish I could say I found this somewhat upsetting but the truth is, I nearly lost my mind. Mamalode published a piece I wrote about that situation. I’d love if you’d check it out. Click here to read it in its entirety.

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No Room For Fear at a Bookstore

They’re going to be glad it was a free event.

They’re going to laugh but it’s going to be that nervous, awkward, “I am so embarrassed for her” kind of laughing. 

I have nothing interesting to say, which would be fine, except that I am holding an event for the very purpose of saying uninteresting things into a microphone. 

It is a bad book. It is a very bad book. Not that I think the people who said it was a good book are liars. I just don’t believe them. 

I am working on a proposal to give a talk on Impostor Syndrome which Dan says ironic because it sounds like I have it, which would be funny, except I really am an Impostor. 

I could have earned myself a Gold in the Negative Self-Talk Olympics, were there any such thing.

When I scheduled my reading of There’s No Room For Fear in a Burley Trailer at the Boulder Book Store, it seemed like a fantastic idea. That was six weeks out. A few days out, it had all the appeal of a root canal.

With less than a week before the event, I had to decide what I was going to read at the event. I read parts of the book once again. When I wrote them, I thought they were brilliant. When I read them three months, ago, on the printed page for the first time, I thought they were fabulous. Days before the reading, however, I felt sick to my stomach as I thumbed through the pages, trying to find a few stories that I could read without sounding like a self-important buffoon.

The day of the reading, the Daily Camera published a blurb about it on page 2. I was both elated and terrified when I saw it.

It would have been one thing if my publisher had told me, “We scheduled this reading. You have to be there. Try and be upbeat and sell some books.”

But I am my publisher and I scheduled it myself.

In the days leading up to the event, I annoyed everyone I talk to on a regular basis as well as people that I don’t, with the issues I’d invented for myself. To their credit, they indulged me. Dan reminded me of all the people who said the book was good, unprompted. My sister listened to me and told me I was crazy and sent me lots of nice, encouraging text messages with tons of emojis. My writing friends said being nervous was normal. My regular friends told me everything I wanted them to say when I called them to whine. Sweet Pea proved once again that she hears everything and understands more of it than I think when she climbed onto my lap and said, apropos of nothing, “Mom, I think you’re an expert.”

The reading was scheduled for 7:30. At 6:58 I walked into the book store by myself while Dan parked the car and wondered how I would make myself say the words, “Hi. I’m here for the book reading. I’m the author.”

But I did. And the book store lady didn’t laugh at me and I didn’t die. She shook my hand, told me her name was Teresa, showed me where to put my jacket and my purse, and gave me a choice between sitting at a table or standing at a podium.

By 7:30 the room was about three quarters full. At some point I looked up and there were people everywhere. Later, my dad said he counted 47 people. Forty seven people listened to me for thirty minutes and lots of them had questions (interesting questions!) to ask afterward. And I enjoyed it. Actually, I loved it. People said it was fantastic and fun and funny and it wasn’t because they felt bad for me or because they were my friends or because they have a bunch of the same DNA as me or Dan. Even Teresa said it was great, which she did not have to do.

I can’t tell you exactly how or why all my jitters and doubts disappeared once I stood behind the podium. I’ll give magic the credit for that.

You have to let magic take over once in a while, or else fear would be in charge and that would be way too boring.

Signing books is fun!

Without Dan, there would be no book.

 

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The Gift of Imperfection

It is good to know you are not perfect. It makes me feel a little better about me!

My friend wrote this in an email to me last week.

That’s all I had to do? Let my friend know I’m not perfect to brighten his day? I’m all in. That’s easy. I am so not perfect. But didn’t he already know that? We’ve been friends ever since we met in a parking lot on warm, early fall New England day in 2006. My running group had just finished a twelve miler but I still had four more to run before I was done. His running group was milling about in the same parking lot. I don’t remember exactly how we connected. I was hot, dehydrated, and glycogen-depleted at the time. But he needed to get four more miles in, too, so off we went. He has been as reliable and motivating a running partner a girl could have, ever since that fateful meeting in the parking lot.

Over the years, we’ve passed the miles with trash talk, laughs, and of course very serious conversations about very serious things, like life, love, career, family, and everything else that makes life interesting and complicated and painful and amazing.

He knows I’m not perfect. And as awesome as my disciplined, successful, tenacious, big-hearted, funny friend is, I know he’s not perfect either. And yet… It’s so easy to forget. It’s way too easy, especially in the age of social media, to compare our insides with our friends’ outsides.

Earlier in the email conversation, my friend  mentioned the weather in Rhode Island and so I mentioned the weather here in Boulder (lots of snow but sunny, in case you were wondering), and then I asked myself why I was sharing information about the weather with this friend who has pounded up hills with me, making me breathe so hard I couldn’t cry about a breakup even if I wanted to, which I did, very badly. He was at the going away party that was so lovely I almost couldn’t bring myself to leave Rhode Island for Boulder. He’s watched me blow my nose into my sleeve in the pre-dawn darkness about a thousand times. We are so beyond small talk.

So I wrote this:

I cried this morning b/c Lady Bug was up a million times before midnight and I have slept through the night about 4 times in the past 4 weeks and I am soooo tired and Lady Bug has been soooo clingy and I yelled at her this morning and Sweet Pea was like “Mom, she’s just a baby!” and so I went to the gym b/c I thought a workout would help my mood and I liked the idea of leaving  them in gym babysitting b/c I wanted a break and then I thought “We’ve been up for less than 3 hours and I already need a break and I’ve yelled at my 20 month old. I am such a failure.” So obviously I should get a job right? But the logistics of childcare (not to mention the cost) with 2 kids and one in preschool… Not super enticing either. Some days are just hard.

And my friend wasn’t like, “You yelled at a baby!? You’re a monster,” which was what I was telling myself. He told me he was glad to know I wasn’t perfect. Which reminds me of one of my favorite quotes:

There is a crack, a crack in everything.

That’s how the light gets in.

-Leonard Cohen

There is a crack, a crack in everything. That's how the light gets in. -Leonard Cohen
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So can we all just go out and be our imperfect selves and live our best, messy, beautiful lives and love each other and- here’s the hard part- ourselves- not just for everything we are, but also for everything we’re not? I’m going to keep trying.

 Happy Valentine’s Day.

 

 

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I’m Not a Player

Do you love to play with your kids? Does your heart burst with joy when they tug on your hand, even if you’re in the middle of unloading the dishwasher or wiping the counter, or sweeping up all the crumbs (again), begging you to “Play, mama!”? Do you love to get on the floor and talk in silly voices and have fake tea parties and examine pretend boo-boos? No? Me, neither. I mean, sometimes I do. But most of the time, I don’t. I’m just not much of a player. I wrote a post on playing with my kids and my complicated feelings on it for the 28 Days of Play series. I hope you’ll join me over there.

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Win a Copy of There’s No Room For Fear in a Burley Trailer

In honor of Valentine’s Day, I’m giving away a copy of my book, There’s No Room For Fear in a Burley Trailer.

I admit I love Valentine’s Day. Certainly I’ve had my share of shitty Valentine’s Days, like the one when I went out with my hot best friend and every guy at the bar wanted to talk to her and no guy wanted talk to me, and I was miserable and lonely and even though I’d eaten nothing but a tangerine and a Morningstar Chick Patty for dinner, I solved the problem by having another drink, and then another and another, until I created a whole new problem for myself in the bathroom of the Orange County Social Club. But I’ve had good ones too, like the one when I got a new door instead of flowers, and of course the one when Dan and I met.

To enter to win, click over to my Facebook post and tag a friend in the comments (also feel free to like my page if you haven’t yet). The contest ends at midnight MST on Saturday 2/13 and I will announce a winner on Valentine’s Day. 

The book is a collection of stories chronicling my journey from amateur triathlete to rookie mom, and all my misadventures along the way (and there are many). And speaking of Valentine’s Day, as much as professing my love for my husband  on social media is not my jam, I have to admit the way the book came about was incredibly romantic. Dan compiled 266 pages worth of what he considered to be my best blog posts and surprised me with this book for my birthday. You can watch my reaction when I opened my birthday present here. Yes, it was the best birthday present ever. No, I do not ever hope to receive another birthday present that can match this one. And if you want to know how he did it, it was a very involved process, of formatting, and copyediting, and style editing, and all kinds of other details that he graciously shared for this guest post on Beyond Your Blog.

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Workout Wednesday: How One Mom Ran Her First Marathon Before Her Baby’s First Birthday

Welcome to another installment of Workout Wednesday! I’m changing things up today with a guest, my friend Erin Gosser. She’s a stay at home mom of two young boys, a blogger, a runner, and a total badass. Erin ran her debut marathon (Chicago) when her kids were four years old and eleven months old, which I think is amazing. The year after my second baby was born, I was happy just to run a few 5k‘s, so after I heard what Erin accomplished, I was desperate to pick her brain. If you know me, you know I’m all about details. I needed to know how she did it, why she did it, and when the heck she ran all those training miles. Thankfully, Erin was happy to answer my questions. I hope you find her quest to run her first marathon as inspiring as I do.

PM: Tell me a little about your background as a runner.

EG: I had run a half marathon five years prior.

PM: What was your fitness routine like prior to having your first child? How did it change after he was born?

EG: Before my first child was born, I’d do all sorts of fitness: classes, yoga, triathlons, short runs. I probably dragged myself to the gym three to four times per week. After my oldest was born, I found the gym more enticing, because it meant I got a BREAK, and he got some socialization with the other kids. Probably, I still worked out three to four times per week.

PM: What was your pregnancy fitness routine like?

EG: With both of my pregnancies, the only thing I didn’t do was go for jogs. I kept up with strength training and yoga mostly, and would do Zumba classes and walk for cardio. [Pam’s note: Zumba is seriously fun, even for uncoordinated wannabe dancers like me.]

PM: What inspired you to sign up for the marathon?

EG: I have two good friends who started BibRave (a sort of Yelp for reviewing races). Tim and Jess were always talking to me (and everyone!) about completing a marathon. Being a stay at home mom, I don’t feel like I reach milestones in my mom career (only other moms will high five your potty training efforts). I knew that the marathon would be something for me, and if I’m being honest, something that would make other people really impressed with. Oh yeah, and that whole lose-the-baby-fat thing. [Pam’s note: Erin wrote a great blog post on this very topic.]

PM: How old were your kids when you ran the race?

EG: My oldest was four, and my little guy was one week shy of turning one year old!

PM: Describe a typical week of training.

EG: Four days of running a week. Three days of 4.5 miles, and the fourth day was the long run, starting at 6 and going up to 20 miles. I would wake at 5am, eat peanut butter slathered on a graham cracker + half a cup of coffee, pump (I successfully nursed the entire time!), and be out the door by 5:30 am. I would religiously stretch for ten minutes after and consume a protein smoothie. My running plan said to cross train, but I did not. In hindsight, this would have helped me, but I was so damn tired. [Pam’s note: I totally understand this!!!!]

PM: What were your biggest barriers to training and how did you overcome them? (eg finding time, engorgement during longer runs, guilt, etc)

EG: My biggest challenge, by far, was nursing + running. It was a mini-marathon every week just to plan, shop, and prepare enough food for all of the calories that were going out! Since my baby was seven months when I started training, he was eating other food besides milk, so I didn’t get engorged or anything (thank God). But it was also challenging to plan around the nursing schedule. The 20 miler took me 4 hours, so I almost always had to feed him immediately when I got home. I remember one time, not changing my shirt before I nursed him, and he was completely soaked in my sweat. GROSS.

PM: What motivated you when you didn’t feel like training?

EG: Honestly, just telling myself that I was going to do it; that this was my time to be selfish. I was disappointed with both deliveries, as they were C sections. One thing that kept me going (especially on race day) was that my body couldn’t deliver the boys on its own, but I could do this on my own. It was sort of redemption for feeling like a failed at childbirth. Let me say: C section birth is just as valid! These are my own personal thoughts with my own two birth experiences.

PM: What advice would you give for other women who are intimidated to set a big, scary, sexy post-baby fitness goal?

EG: “One day at a time” is cliche, but so true. I remember, my nine miler was rough, and I thought, “How the HELL am I going to basically triple this distance?!” I stopped myself and thought, “That doesn’t matter. You’re not running 26 (right now). You’re running 9. Run today’s run TODAY.” It sounds too easy, but get a plan, and run those miles. Your body will follow your brain (not the other way around).

PM: An important question: What is your favorite post-run meal/indulgence?

EG: Chocolate milk immediately after the long run; Chocolate cake doughnut, going out for brunch.

PM: How was your training different from training you done pre-kids for longer events (like your half-marathon or triathlons)? Were there aspects of recovery or planning that took a backseat?

EG: Like I said, I did not cross train. If (when?) I do another marathon, I would cross train. My friend did two days of yoga, and that sounds like the perfect stretch and strength.

Thanks again, Erin for answering my questions. If reading about Erin’s post-baby marathon doesn’t make you want to lace up and go for a run, I don’t know what will.

Erin blogs at Social Butterfly Mom. You can also find her on Facebook, and you should because she’s awesome!

Erin and her family right after the Chicago Marathon. From left: Logan, 4, Erin, husband Aaron, and Colin, 11 mo.  Photo courtesy of Erin Gosser

PS Are you a mom who met (or is working toward) a big, scary, sexy fitness goal? Want to let me interview you for my Workout Wednesday series? Let me know. Shoot me an email at pam (dot) sinel (at) gmail.com

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Workout Wednesday: A Month of The Dailey Method

I’ve been going to The Dailey Method pretty consistently since December 21st. Here’s a rundown of why I decided to go for it, what I love about it, and what I don’t, after a month of classes. From December 21st through today (January 24th), I’ve attended 16 classes. That’s 3.2 classes per week.

I started going because:

• I felt like trying something new.

• I wanted to strengthen my core.

• I wanted learn to engage my core in a functional way; optimally this will transfer to my running and I will be able run again, injury-free.

• I wanted to tone up- specifically my torso but also my arms, legs, and butt would be fine. I dream big.

• I was intrigued by the claims of friends and random strangers on the internet alike, praising the magical, toning powers of bar classes.

What I love:

♥ The location and class times are convenient for me.

♥ The one-hour classes go by fast.

♥ The music.

♥ I did not have to buy a new wardrobe. Full disclaimer: I was… inspired to purchase a couple of new pair of leggings but I wear them everywhere, not just to class. Also, they were on sale. Also, they are insanely comfortable and flattering (perhaps moreso b/c of bar classes, but more on that later). I don’t get free leggings or free anything for this- I just want to share my enthusiasm for these amazing leggings, Athleta’s Chataranga High Rise tight, (NOTE: THEY COME IN PETITE!!!) because I’m a giver.

♥ I was amazed by the fact that I suffered so greatly in class, yet remained 99.8% sweat-free.

♥ I don’t have to shower or even change (see awesome new leggings) after class, which is a big time-saver.

♥ The teachers frequently come around and adjust your hips or whatever to ensure proper form.

♥ No two workouts are exactly the same. Your body never knows what’s up next, so it’s always challenging.

♥ I’m getting stronger! I can lift heavier weights, I can do a better plank for longer, and I can get deeper into some of the crazy thigh-burning squat-type exercises.

♥ Group fitness means you get there when class starts and you leave when it’s over. No excuses. When I’m on my own, I have been known to start late, finish early, or (less frequently) bag the whole thing. But when my class is our shared calendar, and Dan bends his schedule to watch the kids so I can go, I go. No discussion. Yes, I have to schedule it in advance, but that’s kind of the beauty of it. On the weekend, I compare the schedule with my calendar, I plug in classes where I can, and I don’t think about it again.

♥ And of course the whole reason anyone really cares, if we can be honest (and I believe we can)… It works! I have definitely toned up over the five weeks. It is worth noting that my normally healthy eating has been derailed more than usual this month, due to holidays, parties, Dan’s birthday, things of that nature. Also much of the time I’ve devoted time to The Dailey Method would normally be used for cardio. So what I’m saying is:

Worse Eating + Less Cardio + The Dailey Method 3.2x/week x 5 weeks = Results!

I’m talking about definition and slimming of my tummy, more definition in my triceps, and also- this is awesome-  I feel like my butt is lifted. I took the fact that my butt just did its normal thing,  (that thing was staying in place, not sagging in my capri running tights like a wilting Gerber daisy) for granted, until it didn’t anymore. I thought this was a normal effect of being 37 and having had two babies. I thought there was no cure. But I was wrong! I love being wrong sometimes.

What I Don’t Love:

•I don’t sweat. I know, that’s one of the things I do love. As Dan once said, I am a riddle in an enigma. Not sweating certainly has its perks. But I LOVE to sweat. Sometimes I wax nostalgic about the smelly gym where I used to work out in Carrboro, North Carolina. The air conditioning was always malfunctioning. I complained about it with my friends but secretly, I didn’t mind. I loved the sensation of sweat forming perfect, glistening beads that would slip down my forearms about ten minutes into a Stairmaster session. So, it’s a little hard for me to justify spending a precious hour of my free time doing something that qualifies as my workout for the day, yet fails to put me in the sweat zone.

•There’s a lot of stretching. I would estimate 15% of the hour is spent stretching. And while it’s often a welcome break from the glute-burning madness, it sometimes makes me anxious. I did not come to relax. I came to work. To me, time spent stretching would be better spent working. Also, I am competitive and I am very inflexible, so I hate watching everyone else fold their bodies in half while I’m struggling to touch my toes.

So there you have it. My assessment of The Dailey Method after a little over a month of regular attendance. I can’t tell you how it compares to The Bar Method because I haven’t been in over two years and I don’t remember it all that well. I have yet to try Pure Barre, though I’m curious to check it out. Have you tried various bar classes? How did you think The Dailey Method stacks up?

 

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The Ten Best Books I read in 2015

This year I read 30 books. It was really hard to choose the ten best, since I almost always stop reading a book if it doesn’t grab me immediately. I don’t want to be redundant, so I will say this one time. Every book on this list met the Cannot-Put-This-Down-And-Am-Therefore-Up-Way-Past-My-Bedtime Criteria. Unfortunately, there were a few books I couldn’t put down that didn’t make the list. (One of those was mine. If it’s weird that I couldn’t put it down, ok. But it’s true). If you want to know everything I’m reading, and let me know what’s going on in your reading life, connect with me on Goodreads. It’s like Facebook for bibliophiles and I love it. Alternatively, shoot me an email if you need a recommendation or want to give one. I love talking books!

My ten favorite books of 2015 are listed in the order in which I read them, with the most recent first.

The Light Between Oceans by M.L. Stedman. The book begins just after World War I on an island in Australia where a couple tends to the lighthouse. They are shocked when a rowboat carrying a dead man and an infant washes up on shore. The wife, who has just been through two miscarriages, and just two weeks prior, a stillbirth, begs her husband not to report it- at least not right away. As the only people on the island they live a happy, sheltered life as a family, aside from the sharp sense of guilt that gnaws at the the husband. Meanwhile, on the mainland, a woman is bereft over the mystery of her missing baby and husband. When the two families inevitably cross paths, there is no choice available that will satisfy all of the parties involved. I identified with all of the characters, wanting each of them to be happy, yet knowing that the happiness of one would destroy the others.

Kissing In America By Margo Rabb. This book is about a teenage girl who lost her dad in a plane crash. While her relationship with her mom is complicated by the mere fact of her being a teenager, it is stressed further by the fact that she and her mom grieve very differently from one another. This book is a coming of age story, but it’s also about mothers and daughters, love, female friendship, and self-discovery.

Everything I Never Told You by Celeste Ng. When a teenage girl mysteriously drowns in the neighborhood lake, her family is desperate for answers. They know she couldn’t swim. So what was she doing alone on the lake at night? To understand the motivations of a character who never has a chance to speak for herself, Ng takes the reader on a journey that begins with her parents’ meeting. The truth of her parents’ identities, the intricacies of their marriage, and the ways in which their own experiences shape the lives of their deceased daughter and her two siblings is revealed to the reader in a way that makes it impossible not to fall in love with the entire dysfunctional family. This book is just as much a murder mystery as it is a novel about race, gender, and family dynamics.

Friendship by Emily Gould.  If the HBO series Girls were a novel, I feel like this would be it. This is the story of two college friends whose paths diverge after graduation. It explores the intricacies of female friendship in a way that had me nodding my head and wondering if Gould had been spying on me and my roommates in our early 20’s. The main difference between us and the characters in this book is that we didn’t have smartphones. Will you like this book if you’re nothing like me (eg white, upper middle class female who is obsessed with the show Girls)? Maybe, maybe not. But this one really resonated with me.

Listen To Your Mother: What She Said Then, What We’re Saying Now edited by Ann Imig.  I don’t care if you are a mother. You have a mother. Or else you have a big, huge hole in your heart because you didn’t. No matter who you are, if you love good storytelling, you will love this book. Told through the lens of motherhood, these stories are about the joy, the pain, and everything in between, of the human experience. Some of my favorites: The Meat Grinder, the story of a woman whose grandmother teaches her the importance of valuing herself, Does Your Mom Play Drums?, about the former punk rocker mom who gets on stage for her ten year old son’s Nirvana act at the school talent show, and Monkey, Speak, where a mom shares the joy and the heartache that results from her refusal to censor her daughter’s speech. Each story was about two pages or so, which made it all too easy to read “just one more.”

The Girl on the Train by Paula Hawkins. A sad, single woman with an alcohol problem and a vivid imagination sees a couple on their patio through the commuter train window every morning on her way to work. Unable, or unwilling, to separate fact from fiction, she creates a story about them and their life in her mind. When the woman goes missing, she is beside herself with fear and worry, and makes it her business to find out what happened to her and who is responsible. Hawkins takes the reader on a dark, suspenseful journey through the pages of this book.  The chapters are short and the pace is fast. It reminded me of Gone Girl, which I loved.

The Whole Brain Child by Daniel Siegal. I rarely read parenting books, but this one was recommended to me. I find myself thinking about it frequently, and not just when it relates to my kids. The basic premise of the book is that you have to understand some basic neuroanatomy in order to best support your child’s emotional development. (I happen to really enjoy geeking out on neuroscience-type stuff, but even if you don’t, this book breaks it down in a very manageable way.) The best part of this book was that it helped me understand not just my kids’ brains, but my and my husband’s brains, too. It explains why, from a neurological perspective, there’s a good reason why sometimes I just need to cry and be hugged, instead of having Dan try to fix whatever is stressing me out. It’s the same reason why, when my kid is having a total meltdown over the fact that I cut her sandwich wrong, it’s useless to explain that you get what you get and you don’t get upset- until she has calmed down. And in the meantime, I’m not spoiling her by offering a silent snuggle. Did that make any sense? Read the book. It was a game changer for me.

The Husband’s Secret by Lianne Moriarty. When a married mother of three, with a seemingly perfect life discovers that her husband is not exactly who she thought he was, she is faced with a major dilemma. This book is about honesty, relationships, and loyalty. It also serves as a reminder that we shouldn’t judge our insides against anyone else’s outside. Moriarty has a way of drawing you in from the first page, so that you just have to know what’s going to happen to her characters. This one had me constantly wondering, “What would I do if something like this happened to me?” It was fun to discuss at book club.

When It Happens to You by Molly Ringwald. Yes, the Molly Ringwald. She’s not just an 80’s pop culture icon, she’s a fantastic writer, too. I read this one nearly a year ago, but I still find myself remembering random scenes from this book, as if I was there myself, or maybe I dreamed them. The book reads like a collection of short stories, but as it unfolds, you realize that each of the characters are connected to each other in some way. This book is about many things, among them love, betrayal, and infertility. What I loved about it was the way Ringwald fills you in on all the details of one particular aspect of the story, only to zoom way out, giving you a broader view of how that one story fits into a larger context, and has you shaking your head as you realize the situation is not just as you thought.

Being Mortal: Medicine and What Matters in the End by Atul Gawande. If you’ve never read anything by Gawande, go read this, or any of his others, now. He’s a surgeon and an excellent writer, and he’s deeply concerned about the ethics of medicine. This book gets into the issues Americans face at the end of life. Gawande tackles the issue from multiple perspectives- not just as a physician, but also as a human, having watched his own father at the end of his life. He has a really engaging way of weaving statistics in with anecdotes he has culled from his experience as a physician and from his own family.

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