Samantha Beardon's Blog, page 54

Too good to resist

​

Holding my trust in its fragile packaging

Wondering whether to have plenty, or rationing

Having faith in myself, to make the right choices

Still listening to inward, warning voices

I have been hurt, many times before

Got to have trust, this time, hurt no more

You nurture my needs and understand

Being open to sharing, as you hold out your hand

Taking a chance

Starting this new romance

Knowing it could just be attraction 

Having confidence, that’s satisfaction

Opening my arms and embracing the risk

Beginning our dance you are too good to resist

Red letter day

​Feelings

For You

Just get better

Love

Longing strong

Red letter day

Friendship

Firmly Grasped

Strong bonds stay

Partnership

Particular trust

Together we should stay

Measure

​Can you match me measure for measure

Will you be master of my pleasure

Can you pull me out of this Web of apathy

Save me from from feelings bordering on insanity

New love ,new feelings

Exciting romance expunge past dealings

Trying to trust and believe anew

Fragile buds unfurl to view.

I am on fire…adult content

I am on fire

Filled with desire

My world contracted

My body reacted

I sit in the gloom

In a bar type room

Drinking a brandy

Ever so randy

I am not alone

As I sit with my phone

My cyber lover is there

With pictures so rare

His words weave a story

Ever so stormy

We share fantasies

Outside moralities

It makes us smile

Our senses to beguile

We can share anywhere

If a signal is there

What to do next

Thats a question to vex…

I am on fire

Filled with desire…

Overview

​I feel your happiness

I feel your pain

I share some of life’s refrain

Transience

I share your problems

I divert your mind

I walk beside or trail behind

Heartstrings

I comfort you as best I can

I want to heal you that’s the scope

I want to be your beacon of hope

Sham

I feel for you

I read of you 

I cannot touch you

Overview.

Find inner calm?

​Rejection always a bitter gall

Dejection written through inner walls

Emotions built up through the years

Confidence never deployed, negative image fears

Wanting to be loved, to be recognised

Hiding needs under a thin disguise

Each rejection, underlines the lack

Stepping forward, no going back

Needs to be held and validated

Instead gives love ,uncompensated

Alone but not alone

Injured inside, feelings not outgrown

Searching for love always disappointed

Living life in ways disjointed

Needs to validate the self

Find inner happiness, get off the shelf

Running from life

​Hot sun, running fast , dry throat

Sweating,  panting, heavy slope

On the brink of decline

Dive into a vat of white  wine

Now trying to stay afloat

Running from life. Footnote

Day dreams

​Day dreams hold me, fitting like a glove

 Floating weightless, visions that I love

 Gravitating upwards, towards the elusive picture

There are no limits to the excitement within the mixture

 Pushing the boundaries of what can be done

Wanting to touch you, emotions overcome

Mind picture sees me sitting by your side

Sliding down upon your lap maybe take a ride

Stretching all our senses searching for fun

Longing for your body, truly overcome.

It started with a sniffle

​It started with a sniffle

Then a little cough

Snuffles on my pillows

I didn’t give a toss

Suddenly I seemed much warmer

Then chills, up and down my spine

My nose started dripping

My mind was in decline

Then the mucus fairy

Waved her little wand

My chest filled up with mucus

Like filling up a pond

It seems my major airways

Had become a water trap

I started coughing noisily

Couldn’t shift the crap

I found I couldn’t lay down

And even sitting up

My chest made this weird music

Like screech, whistle, dup dup.

My sniffle is a water fall

My cough spasmodic gunk

I feel pretty miserable

I look more goth than punk

I wonder how to tempt

That sweet fairy into the light

I just would like to catch her

Share some of my delight!!

She lives in two worlds

​She lives in two worlds, that is the norm

Mind numbing reality and riding the storm

Being a drab, totally unappreciated, to sex goddess worshiped 

The total high priestess

Life in the real world versus living on line

Broken down living to feeling sublime

Harried and criticised most of the time, then validated complimented 

A pampered princess

Wanting real life to measure the dream

She hopes that white knight will make her his queen

Falling hard for a fantasy,  can she keep this as release

 Or is it destined to become a ravening beast

Can she choose, is she in control

Is fantasy too seductive the real world too cold

What does she need to do, to achieve happiness

Maybe value herself, be her own success.