Scarlet Risque's Blog, page 22

My Forbidden Desire

Every time I repeat myself that I have to give up your “drug”, that I have to stop looking at you the way I always do.

But then you come back: and you come back  in all your splendor, all your charm, all your beauty, and I cannot help but feel won.

I am bound to be won by you: your sensuality captivate me.

Your face is a perfect oval, your cat’s eyes look mysterious and seductive.

And your legs!

Your legs that make me want  to meet you, to feel all of the delicate skin of your thighs, of your calves…

Your complexion of pure porcelain: you,  magnificent statue of jade, the symbol of eternal femininity and of its magic, hell and paradise at the same time!

Who knows if I will, one day, be stronger than your temptation? …

Hot kisses, as hot as you’ve never had …

Your slave,

Knight Julian

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Twist and Kneel

Dance lesson today was about learning a trick that involves the lead twisting the hand of the follower into a downward kneeling position and swinging the follower 360 degrees before she stands up again to continue dancing. 

Twist and kneel, twist and kneel. We repeated the steps over and over and all I was thinking is how to enact that step privately on a victim, or to use it in sync with a aikido move. Then again, I am the follower so all I can do is try to follow and god dam it’s so difficult ! But nevertheless we did almost concluded the class learning that step. 

After much self inflicted masohistic dance training and 14 000 steps on my Mi Band, and a brand new regime to quit coffee to write more hours to avoid a caffeine crash (I think I might fail on quitting coffee), and increasing my exercise schedule to five times a week on this marathon novel month, writing a thousand words a day still isn’t fast enough and I need to up it to a thousand five hundred words a day. 

Don’t know why I am putting myself through all these when life can be easier just consuming and not creating, but the better question would be why aren’t most people creating in their short lifespans. But anyway I just got to do what I can. 

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Landmark Forum – Cult or Breakthrough?

When I was 19 years old, I took a three day company sponsored seminar and wrote down three goals: 1) Publish a book 2) Generate Passive Income 3) Visit New York. I had to write down my fear as well, which was Age. Then, we had to do a karate chop on a wooden board and “banish” our fears and achieve our goals. Well, all three goals did come true. What was next? On my friend’s recommendation I signed up for the Landmark Forum to find out “what is next”.

When I signed up, I was expecting another Toastmasters or personal development course. What really came out of it was actually, totally different from anything else I had ever experienced in my life. It’s powerful and life changing, and I believe the power of it’s roots is traced to Ancient Greece.

When I visited Greece last year, I was lots of ancient ruins and “forum” like amphitheaters. In primary school, my principal insisted that our school needed to build a 100 seater “forum” that was dug into the ground and we would practice choir or watch musical performances.  The key here is “forum”.

The “forum” was the cradle of philosophical discussions in Ancient Greece that was then, used by the Roman Empire to create a civilization. In these forums, philosophers, artists, politicians would gather and discuss about intellectual ideas on how to build a civilization, how to create a democracy, and how to advance their empire. It was through the sharing and improving of ideas that the world we live in now has progressed to what it is.

On hindsight, ancient China did not have forums. Neither they had universities nor libraries like Rome. Because the Chinese culture was traditionally a “closed” culture, they could only advance their knowledge by passing it on to the next generation through apprenticeship. A master can only take a few disciples. Hence over the centuries, much knowledge is lost due to burning of written records and when masters “disappear”.

For this reason, things remain unchanged in China for hundreds of years as they held on to conservative traditions and a rejection to change. Till today, China does not have much technological innovation. They have to borrow of western ideas due to this lack of sharing and open collaboration. The lack of originality and creativity is due to sticking with proven formulas to generate results. However, in this cyber changing world, formulas that worked yesterday, will not work tomorrow.

The Landmark Forum opens up possibilities of change by intellectualising the process of thought and creating topics for open discussion with complete strangers. A moderator would lead the forum and bring up a new conversation topic. Then, participants are to pair up to take turns to talk about the topic.

When I read reviews on the Landmark Forum online, I am completely flabbergasted that people would think the Landmark is a cult. If Landmark is a cult, is Toastmasters a cult too? I believe that a course that promotes self actualisation and personal empowerment would open up our mind and create new ways of thinking and creation to find out what was not possible before.

After the three days of Landmark, I felt totally empowered to make key changes in my life. I felt totally connected to my soul purpose and what I had to do next. What I got out of it was not just what I had to do, but how to do it, and where my blind spots were. The Landmark Forum is in fact, one of the most powerful courses widely available to humankind today.

Here are some quotes from the Landmark Forum:

“The greater the idea, the greater the resistance.”

“Living a reasonable life is the lowest level of living.”

In essence, the Landmark Forum condenses the most powerful concepts written by philosophers that we can apply in our daily lives and interactions with others to gain clarity in our conversations. It creates distinctions by giving us new tools of language that we can use to bring into awareness of what we were not aware of before. Like riding a bicycle, we wouldn’t know how it feels to balance on a bike till we experience the motion of being suspended on two wheels. Be open and coachable and you will discover that a bigger, larger you exist deep within, and that the daily actions you take now as long lasting impact in the world we live in.

My Landmark breakthroughs can be view in this category: AVERRAL Landmark.

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A Visit to Vermillion (Part 2)

Well, this was certainly a tricky situation. Her Supreme Majesty about to arrive in town, and neither he and his guards nor the town itself were properly prepared for the occasion. That was stressful enough. But now Alex had to deal with this … person too. What was she? An impostor? A double? The Queen Herself, travelling in disguise? Or just an ordinary traveller who happened to look like the Queen? Maybe she was an hallucination, caused by the panic in his mind. Or a divine apparition – she was right outside the Scarlet Temple, after all.

“If you don’t mind me asking… I know it must seem a strange question, but what’s the name of this town?” Repeated the girl in white, “I’m very lost, you see…”
Alex realised he’d been staring into space for a few moments… Well whatever the explanation he wasn’t going to solve anything just by standing there. Give the woman an answer!

“This is Vermillion, Miss, and I’m in charge of the town guards, my name’s Captain Alexander. Have you been here before? Perhaps on your way to the city of Rufus, in the North?”

“I don’t think so… I don’t know… I really have no idea. I was in those caves such a long time… it was so dark and…” She was clearly upset by whatever had happened; her eyes were cast down to the ground and her slender fingers gripped tightly the gold key that hung on a chain around her neck.

A bizarre story. Alex didn’t know of any major cave systems in the area. Yet the girl seemed sincere, her eyes were frightened, confused and lost. A traveller with amnesia? Perhaps she’d been attacked in the forest.

Pitying this frail and timid girl, Alex put his hand on her shoulder “Well, let’s find you somewhere to stay the night, eh? Maybe you’ll remember a bit more in the morning. And we most certainly must find you some proper clothes, you really can’t be seen in that white dress once Her Most Superior Majesty arrives.”

“Her Majesty?”

Damn… he wasn’t supposed to announce Her arrival to the people until the last moment. But this poor lost soul didn’t seem much of a threat. It would be a relief to tell someone, anyway…

“Yes. Don’t tell anyone else, but we are expecting, very soon, the arrival of our glorious Queen Risque! Isn’t that a fantastic honour? You’ve certainly come to Vermillion at the right time – this is the most exciting thing that’s happened here in years!”

“Queen Risque?!”

Alex rubbed his forehead and sighed. The poor girl must have lost nearly all her memories. Queen Risque had ruled the kingdom all his life, as long as anyone could remember, never ageing – the proof of her divinity – and her cult was central to the lives of Her minions and subjects throughout the kingdom. To forget Her was to forget everything.

“I can’t face her. Not yet. I’m not strong enough.”

“Ahh, so you’ve not forgotten quite everything then!” Alex smiled, trying to cheer up the melancholy young lady. “Don’t worry, none of us are strong enough to face the Dark Queen! And why would we want to, when She rules over us so generously, bestowing Her gifts of pain and pleasure? I saw Her once before, you know, when I went to Scarlet Palace to swear my oath of loyalty. I wasn’t close, but I could see Her. One of the proudest days of my life! Anyway, when She arrives just kneel down and copy everyone else, you’ll be fine.”

“No, please… I must get away from here before she comes, I’m not… I can’t…”

“Alright then, if you insist. But let’s find you a coat first, at least. You must be freezing.” The girl was too pretty and too naive to let her wander into the forest alone like that. So they went to the market and found a red cloak. It would keep her warm and present a more respectable image than that white dress. While Alex was talking to the market trader, the girl looked up at the temple, astonished.

“That is where you worship?”

“Yes, of course, we all go there to pay our respects to Her Dark Majesty. Vermillion’s not an important town but we have a splendid statue of the Goddess Risque at the temple! Actually you’ll be surprised – you look a lot like Her!”

“Thank you so much for your help, Captain Alexander” she replied, changing the subject hastily. “I really must be on my way to… ummm… Rufus. I think that name sounds familiar. It’s to the North, did you say?”

“That’s right! I’m glad you’re starting to remember now. If you pass Vermillion again on your way back, do stop and let me know if your memory has come back. Be careful in the forest, keep away from the Knights.”

“Knights?” Her eyes lit up at the mention of that word.

“Yes, the Knights, that’s what they call themselves. Technically they are a criminal organisation, but they’re mostly harmless if you ask me… deluded fools, they believe the old legends about Princess Cheryl, that one day she will return and bring an end to Queen Risque’s rule. Well we wouldn’t want that, would we!? So we go out of the town walls to attack them once in a while and drive them away. So that all of Her Majesty’s loyal minions and subjects can serve and worship Her obediently in peace!”

(“Attack” had been an exaggeration. Alex and the other minion guards went out into the forest every time they received fresh reports of the Knights’ camping in the woods near Vermillion. They marched around noisily, waving their scarlet banners and beating their drums, hoping the knights would move on once they heard them approach. Usually the plan worked, and the two groups rarely clashed. “We don’t really want to fight them and they don’t really want to fight us. But we have our commands, and they have their beliefs, so… the show must go on!” As Alex had justified the strategy to his troops.)

“I see,” the girl smiled at last, “don’t worry, I’m sure I’ll be safe!”

“Good luck then, Miss… umm?”

“Cheryl” she grinned, as she turned away and danced into the forest.

Minion Alex

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WIL – What Are We Waiting For?

WIL is my childhood friend. We are sworn best friends forever or BFF. He wanted to make music while I wanted to write novels. When we were teenagers, he asked me if he should pursue singing, I asked, “Why not?” The seeds were planted in that moment.

I believe that the synergistic push and pull effect of encouraging and supporting each other had lead to us pursuing our dreams to go against the mold. When I felt like almost giving up on publishing my first book, WIL had been instrumental in pushing me on, “It is possible, you can do it!”

Flash forward after graduating from Monash University, he had released a few singles while I had published my first book, Red Hourglass. His music is available at wilentertain.com

What are we waiting for? We are not waiting for anything, it all happens in the now. We decide what we want to do today, for the impact we want others to experience. His latest song inspires me to create more and not stop! To be unstoppable! I really love the remix by Sean Finn and it’s a great song to unwind.

Be unstoppable!

 

 

 

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2016 Updates from Scarlet Queen

Patreon page revamp at http://www.patreon.com/scarletqueen
Release of private Risque content on patreon
Worship wall scheduled with weekly posts from knights and minions
Writing of sequel to Red Hourglass, Blue Ocra
Weekly YouTube videos scheduled for release
More instructions for knights and minions episodes to be released

Risque is halfway to her milestone to start filming at The Scarlet Hotel. The Scarlet Queen YouTube channel is made possible by knights and minions on patreon.

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Conceptual Decorating

Whilst I am running a high fever, a long wait at the doctor led me to a visit to an electronics store. In my minds eye, I pieced the equipment I would like to purchase and what I have existing. I beautified my apartment by placing the equipment for my dream kitchen in my vision. 

First, I would have a Samsung fridge with different compartments for different types of food storage with an ice twister. Then, a coffee maker where I can put two spoonfuls of coffee power to be filtered with hot water for a thick delicious roasted coffee. I would purchase a steamer for the size of two people with three different compartments for soups, steamed vegetables and yam. A toaster is essential, but more so is a oven grill to bake my daily salmon. 

I imagined these things as I sighed. Not long ago, I lived in a dream apartment with a lover, with swimming pools and sky gyms but we parted ways. Living with him was like playing a daily match of poker, I never knew what he was thinking. 

No matter what I did, he seemed not physically interested in me. There were no cuddles or holding hands, no deep conversations nor loving words. At night I would walk around the apartment grounds, wondering what part of me was an abomination. Day by day, I felt more and more like a monster instead of a woman. My confidence hit rock bottom and I left him. 

Maybe the reason I started the scarlet queen channel was a result of feeling unwomanly and undesired. Now, fan mails flood my inbox daily but yet, why do I feel like I am still a monster ? 

I wonder. 

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A Full Circle

Her laughter used to fill the room.

She sat on the circular table once, but now that seat remains empty. The circle now has a hole. It’s an incomplete circle but a curved line with no joined endings.

“It’s unauspicious to leave a gap on a circular table,” my grand uncle said, beckoning for her young son to seat in the empty chair although he can’t fit comfortably in an adult sized chair.

The sudden departure of her years ago, in this exact same moment, seemed like it was a second passed. Her son sulks in her seat, turning backwards to face the television.

It just isn’t the same, isn’t the same without her booming laughter. There was awkward silences and pauses in the conversation that was once filled with her loud voice.

Once upon a time, she flew the skies as a stewardess in a sarong kabaya. She met an Irishman and gave life to three beautiful Eurasian kids. The youngest, who looked uncanny like her but with dark brown eyes, now sat beside me on the circular table. He continued to watch the television.

I paid attention to every single detail, soaking the conversation in like it may be the last moment before someone goes to the next world. There are no warnings, no signs. The silent killer lurks deeply embedded in our DNA. There is no running or hiding, it strikes when no one is looking, in the pink of health, in the moment of joy.

When it was time to leave my grand uncle called from behind, “Where’s your lover? Bring him to me!”

I chirped like a nightingale and ran towards the sunset. Running and running through fortresses, castles and ancient ruins. Lost in my wanderlust of endless adventure. My dreams of conquering the world with my words, conjoined with my lover in a black cocoon covered by my long hair in our dance before we emerging as butterflies.

She once sang a song in the skies. One day I will meet her in the heaven and tell her about all the worlds I wrote. She would say to me in her resonant voice, “Well done, you had completed the full circle.”

 

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My Daemon

You breathed colours into my monochrome life. Pieced the shattered fragments of my soul. Listened to my soul song and saw me for who I am. Embraced my core as one complete whole instead of two halves. How could I ever thank you?

The memories of us, forged into one desire. Our letters, now immortalized. Our love, radiating outwards like the sun.

Time and space seems to drift us further away in this galaxy divided by sliding screens. For this I must sing my song, louder and louder to reach to you.

When I say “echo”, my promise lives on, for us and for others like us, they will feel our combined purpose in the liberation of others in their kinky ways.

You are my daemon and the air that I breathe. The light has returned to my eyes.

I await for you painfully with pleasure.

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For thine is the Queendom, the Power, and Glory. Forever and ever, Amen.

Our Mother who art into bondage, hallowed be thy name.

Thy Queendom come, they will be done.

On Earth as it is in Heaven.

Give us today our daily bled, and punish our trespasses.

As we punish those that trespass against us.

And deliver us into temptation, and something something evil.

For thine is the Queendom, the Power, and Glory. Forever and ever, Amen.

Minion Pervswerve

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