Danielle Steel's Blog, page 40

7/27/15, Green Eyed Monster

Hi Everyone,

Before I share this week’s blog with you, I want to tell you how touched and totally bowled over I was by your loving and heartfelt messages about Sam Ewing. As of this moment, there are 146 messages from you about him, and you really, really touched my heart, and his wonderful mother has read them too. I can’t begin to tell you what it means to all of us. Thank you for your incredible kindness and beautiful words. With love from all of us.

And now for some more mundane thoughts!! I hope that all is well with you!!!

I hope your summer is rolling out smoothly and nicely with fun times, some relaxing days, and maybe even a great vacation you’ve been waiting all year to take. I love these summer days.

The Green Eyed Monster I’m talking about is jealousy, and I think it’s a REALLY important subject, for all of us. It is the seen and unseen evil in all of our lives, no matter who or where we are, at whatever level or stage in life. And it can wreak havoc in our lives, and often does.

I read a comment to my blog recently, from someone having trouble at work. I hear it from friends, my children at their jobs, and experience it myself every day. It may come in the form of a small snide comment from a co-worker, or even a boss, that takes you by surprise, or it may even take the form of some truly wicked planning by someone who is out to do you harm. And jealousy often comes from unexpected quarters, from someone you just can’t even imagine would be jealous of you. Some jealous people go to great lengths to hide it, others unabashedly go after you in some way. But whether hidden or overt, jealousy is one of the most corrosive, potentially dangerous elements in all of our lives. I have long since had a great “respect” for just how dangerous other people’s jealousies can be.

As a famous person, people in the outer circle of our lives see the outer trappings (all of them perfectly manicured and dressed up for your viewing pleasure) of a public person’s life. You see how handsome their children are, how big their house, how nice their clothes. You’re told how successful they are, how much fun they’re having, and shown how fabulous they supposedly are. In most cases, you don’t see how troubled one or more of their children may be, how stretched their finances, how bad their marriage (except in the tabloids), you don’t see them crying over the griefs in their life, or on a bad hair day, or with stomach flu. In a way, we are set up to be jealous of them. And they in turn, as famous people, are set up as an open target for other people’s envy—-which is a scary situation to be in. I’ve had my share of threats, and nasty jealous hate mail too, for all those reasons, and have also experienced other people’s jealousy at close range, from people I know. Jealousy almost always comes as a surprise, and it can be a powerful negative force against us.

No matter who we are, or what we have, there is always going to be someone, or a lot of someones who have more than we do. In today’s high tech world, 20 something year olds have made billions of dollars. People with old fortunes, or who started amazing companies, have fortunes we can’t even dream of, and seem to get to do everything we wish we could, but can’t. And even those people have their share of problems, sick kids, bad marriages, the problems that plague us all.

At every level, I hear friends complain about one really nasty person at their workplace who is making their life miserable, and is out for their job. I hear it from my children, and experience it myself. NO ONE is exempt. Jealousy can be spawned by things that seem absurd to us, and so trivial as to be unimportant. But jealousy aimed at you is NEVER unimportant, and is an often unseen poison that can make our lives miserable, or even cost us our jobs. The reasons for it may be obvious, or seem crazy or absurd. You may have prettier clothes than they do, a better marriage (in their perception), a cuter boyfriend or girlfriend, more successful or less troublesome kids, a better car, a nicer home, or even a pair of shoes they really want, or you may look like you’re having more fun (they don’t see the problems you don’t talk about that you may have at home). It can take very little to inspire jealousy in others. Maybe someone thinks that your boss likes you better, or you’ve had more advantages in life, or a better education. The more visible you are, the more outgoing, the more you are enjoying your life, or doing well, the more of a target you become. I’ve experienced jealousy from unexpected sources, nasty comments from other mothers at school, the terrible heart-wrenching discovery that someone I thought was a friend is actually consumed with jealousy and not sincere. Those people forget the hardships in our life, or don’t see them, they forget the price we pay for what we ‘have’, or how hard we work for it. One of my youngest children has experienced jealousy at work, they figure she has an easier life than they do, my older, more experienced, more successful children are targets every day, and so are yours. There is always something we have or do, that other people want and figure we don’t deserve. And I am always shocked when jealousy comes out of the woodwork and rears its ugly head. In a way, it’s a blessing when people expose those feelings, rather than having them operating unseen behind the scenes, when we don’t even suspect it.

Almost every time, when people I know tell me about problems they’re having at work, or with a ‘friend’, or even with a spouse or a boyfriend/girlfriend, jealousy is at the root of it, because they think you’re better off than they are, and you don’t deserve it.

If you speak to religious leaders, priests or ministers, they will tell you that one of the things they pray about daily is the evil force of jealousy in the world, both seen and unseen.

It may seem ridiculous to you, whatever your circumstances, that someone would be jealous of you. ‘Who? Me? Are you kidding? I have a mountain of bills on my desk, I’m about to lose my job, my house is a mess, one of my kids is partying too much, my car is about to die. I think my partner is cheating on me, and I haven’t bought so much as a new pair of jeans in 2 years.’ But to someone else, whatever you have or do, or have accomplished may look like a piece of Heaven to them, a piece of Heaven that they want, and think they deserve more than you. Sadly, there are people out there, or even close to us, who do not celebrate our victories, aren’t sincere, and rejoice silently when we fall flat on our face, or lose something or someone we love.

I think jealousy is something we really need to be alert to, not in a hysterical paranoid way. Everyone is not out to get you. But in every life, there are people we are not aware of, and some we are, who don’t wish us well, who would get us in trouble at work if they can, and make our lives miserable, with a badly placed comment, an eye to taking our partner from us, or our job, or just sap our confidence in ourselves. When people do or say mean things to you, take a good look at the source. Do they REALLY have your best interest at heart? Or do they just want to make you feel bad? Are they undermining you at your job? Even your boss can be jealous of you, if they think you are rising too fast, having a better life, or jeopardizing them in some way. You may think you have nothing for anyone to be jealous of, and may be totally unaware that someone wants something you have, and is secretly mad that you have it.

I don’t think we should be paranoid about it, but I do think we need to be aware and protect ourselves. Even if you’re not a show off and don’t brag, your happiness with your life as it is, or some part of it, may be more than someone else can stomach. None of us need that kind of negative force in our lives. So when you’re having a hard time at work, as we all do at times, or like the woman who wrote the comment on the blog, or when a ‘friend’ does something surprisingly hurtful, or people deck you with a nasty comment and really make you sad—–take a good look at the source, and if you see the green eyed monster staring back at you, or even suspect it, take a careful step back, and try to stay out of range of that person’s jealousy of you. Protect yourself. Don’t let other people’s jealousy rob you of the peace, and joy, the accomplishments and sense of well-being that you have probably worked hard for, and truly deserve. The Green Eyed Monster of jealousy is a thief, that would rob you of what makes you happy and feel good about yourself. Just be careful, and be alert, some people really are jealous of the smallest things in our lives—–small to us maybe, but big to them. Don’t let jealousy from others rob you of anything!!!!

love, Danielle

The post 7/27/15, Green Eyed Monster appeared first on daniellesteel.net.

7/27/15, “The Green Eyed Monster”

Hi Everyone,

Before I share this week’s blog with you, I want to tell you how touched and totally bowled over I was by your loving and heartfelt messages about Sam Ewing. As of this moment, there are 146 messages from you about him, and you really, really touched my heart, and his wonderful mother has read them too. I can’t begin to tell you what it means to all of us. Thank you for your incredible kindness and beautiful words. With love from all of us.

And now for some more mundane thoughts!! I hope that all is well with you!!!

I hope your summer is rolling out smoothly and nicely with fun times, some relaxing days, and maybe even a great vacation you’ve been waiting all year to take. I love these summer days.

The Green Eyed Monster I’m talking about is jealousy, and I think it’s a REALLY important subject, for all of us. It is the seen and unseen evil in all of our lives, no matter who or where we are, at whatever level or stage in life. And it can wreak havoc in our lives, and often does.

I read a comment to my blog recently, from someone having trouble at work. I hear it from friends, my children at their jobs, and experience it myself every day. It may come in the form of a small snide comment from a co-worker, or even a boss, that takes you by surprise, or it may even take the form of some truly wicked planning by someone who is out to do you harm. And jealousy often comes from unexpected quarters, from someone you just can’t even imagine would be jealous of you. Some jealous people go to great lengths to hide it, others unabashedly go after you in some way. But whether hidden or overt, jealousy is one of the most corrosive, potentially dangerous elements in all of our lives. I have long since had a great “respect” for just how dangerous other people’s jealousies can be.

As a famous person, people in the outer circle of our lives see the outer trappings (all of them perfectly manicured and dressed up for your viewing pleasure) of a public person’s life. You see how handsome their children are, how big their house, how nice their clothes. You’re told how successful they are, how much fun they’re having, and shown how fabulous they supposedly are. In most cases, you don’t see how troubled one or more of their children may be, how stretched their finances, how bad their marriage (except in the tabloids), you don’t see them crying over the griefs in their life, or on a bad hair day, or with stomach flu. In a way, we are set up to be jealous of them. And they in turn, as famous people, are set up as an open target for other people’s envy—-which is a scary situation to be in. I’ve had my share of threats, and nasty jealous hate mail too, for all those reasons, and have also experienced other people’s jealousy at close range, from people I know. Jealousy almost always comes as a surprise, and it can be a powerful negative force against us.

No matter who we are, or what we have, there is always going to be someone, or a lot of someones who have more than we do. In today’s high tech world, 20 something year olds have made billions of dollars. People with old fortunes, or who started amazing companies, have fortunes we can’t even dream of, and seem to get to do everything we wish we could, but can’t. And even those people have their share of problems, sick kids, bad marriages, the problems that plague us all.

At every level, I hear friends complain about one really nasty person at their workplace who is making their life miserable, and is out for their job. I hear it from my children, and experience it myself. NO ONE is exempt. Jealousy can be spawned by things that seem absurd to us, and so trivial as to be unimportant. But jealousy aimed at you is NEVER unimportant, and is an often unseen poison that can make our lives miserable, or even cost us our jobs. The reasons for it may be obvious, or seem crazy or absurd. You may have prettier clothes than they do, a better marriage (in their perception), a cuter boyfriend or girlfriend, more successful or less troublesome kids, a better car, a nicer home, or even a pair of shoes they really want, or you may look like you’re having more fun (they don’t see the problems you don’t talk about that you may have at home). It can take very little to inspire jealousy in others. Maybe someone thinks that your boss likes you better, or you’ve had more advantages in life, or a better education. The more visible you are, the more outgoing, the more you are enjoying your life, or doing well, the more of a target you become. I’ve experienced jealousy from unexpected sources, nasty comments from other mothers at school, the terrible heart-wrenching discovery that someone I thought was a friend is actually consumed with jealousy and not sincere. Those people forget the hardships in our life, or don’t see them, they forget the price we pay for what we ‘have’, or how hard we work for it. One of my youngest children has experienced jealousy at work, they figure she has an easier life than they do, my older, more experienced, more successful children are targets every day, and so are yours. There is always something we have or do, that other people want and figure we don’t deserve. And I am always shocked when jealousy comes out of the woodwork and rears its ugly head. In a way, it’s a blessing when people expose those feelings, rather than having them operating unseen behind the scenes, when we don’t even suspect it.

Almost every time, when people I know tell me about problems they’re having at work, or with a ‘friend’, or even with a spouse or a boyfriend/girlfriend, jealousy is at the root of it, because they think you’re better off than they are, and you don’t deserve it.

If you speak to religious leaders, priests or ministers, they will tell you that one of the things they pray about daily is the evil force of jealousy in the world, both seen and unseen.

It may seem ridiculous to you, whatever your circumstances, that someone would be jealous of you. ‘Who? Me? Are you kidding? I have a mountain of bills on my desk, I’m about to lose my job, my house is a mess, one of my kids is partying too much, my car is about to die. I think my partner is cheating on me, and I haven’t bought so much as a new pair of jeans in 2 years.’ But to someone else, whatever you have or do, or have accomplished may look like a piece of Heaven to them, a piece of Heaven that they want, and think they deserve more than you. Sadly, there are people out there, or even close to us, who do not celebrate our victories, aren’t sincere, and rejoice silently when we fall flat on our face, or lose something or someone we love.

I think jealousy is something we really need to be alert to, not in a hysterical paranoid way. Everyone is not out to get you. But in every life, there are people we are not aware of, and some we are, who don’t wish us well, who would get us in trouble at work if they can, and make our lives miserable, with a badly placed comment, an eye to taking our partner from us, or our job, or just sap our confidence in ourselves. When people do or say mean things to you, take a good look at the source. Do they REALLY have your best interest at heart? Or do they just want to make you feel bad? Are they undermining you at your job? Even your boss can be jealous of you, if they think you are rising too fast, having a better life, or jeopardizing them in some way. You may think you have nothing for anyone to be jealous of, and may be totally unaware that someone wants something you have, and is secretly mad that you have it.

I don’t think we should be paranoid about it, but I do think we need to be aware and protect ourselves. Even if you’re not a show off and don’t brag, your happiness with your life as it is, or some part of it, may be more than someone else can stomach. None of us need that kind of negative force in our lives. So when you’re having a hard time at work, as we all do at times, or like the woman who wrote the comment on the blog, or when a ‘friend’ does something surprisingly hurtful, or people deck you with a nasty comment and really make you sad—–take a good look at the source, and if you see the green eyed monster staring back at you, or even suspect it, take a careful step back, and try to stay out of range of that person’s jealousy of you. Protect yourself. Don’t let other people’s jealousy rob you of the peace, and joy, the accomplishments and sense of well-being that you have probably worked hard for, and truly deserve. The Green Eyed Monster of jealousy is a thief, that would rob you of what makes you happy and feel good about yourself. Just be careful, and be alert, some people really are jealous of the smallest things in our lives—–small to us maybe, but big to them. Don’t let jealousy from others rob you of anything!!!!

love, Danielle

The post 7/27/15, “The Green Eyed Monster” appeared first on daniellesteel.net.

7/20/15, Fallen Hero

In the early morning hours of July 4, a hero emerged in an old Victorian home in Los Angeles. The hero was a man I’ve known since he was a boy, named Sam Ewing, known to his friends as Sammy.

I first met Sam in his teens, a wiry funny lively, bright boy, full of life, with a passion and gift for music. He wanted to be a writer when he grew up, and was one of my son Nick’s two very best friends. They met on the music scene when both were playing in bands as kids. Nick’s was on a track toward success, and he and Sammy became fast friends. The boys spent time together, with their other friends, always dedicated to their music, and talented writers. Sammy was always fun, funny, the two were often up to harmless mischief and thought starting food fights among their friends was great sport. They had good years together in their teens, happily chasing girls, constantly playing music. They were part of a group of close ‘guy’ friends, and were a trio of good kids, with another close friend of Nick’s named Max. The three boys were inseparable, and Sammy came on vacation with us several times with our family. As an only child, Sam thoroughly enjoyed and was welcomed into our big family, with siblings both older than Nick, and younger. Sam fit right in and was always welcome and part of the fun.

Sadly, tragedy hit their group early on. Nick’s closest childhood friends fell one by one, to accidents (one hit by a drunk driver while crossing a street in the crosswalk), Nick’s suicide at nineteen. Then their friend Max’s suicide later. One by one, like the ten little Indians, they disappeared. Sammy was 3 years older than the others, and as of three years ago, was the last survivor of the group. He turned 40 in April. And after Nick’s death, he took on the role of stand in big brother to Nick’s younger siblings, a role has continued faithfully, and was particularly kind and attentive to my youngest daughter, trying to stand in for Nick. He worked in my office for 7 years after he finished college, was much loved by all, still played music in various bands at night, and tried to start a budding career as a writer, working on a novel, and writing under the pen name of Sam Winston. He had talent, life, energy, bright ideas, friends and a mother who loved him. He began in San Francisco, and moved to LA in the last year to add new horizons to his life, and worked on the music scene, still writing.

In LA, he moved into an old Victorian house with 4 roommates. And on the night of July 3rd, an electrical fire broke out. Within seconds, the house was filled with heavy black smoke. Sam came out of the house, found himself alone on the street, waiting for the fire department to arrive, and none of his roommates came out. Overwhelmed by the smoke, his 4 roommates were dazed, as Sam saw the house begin to collapse in the flames and smoke. Without hesitating, he rushed back inside, found his roommates, and one by one carried them to safety. Two were critically burned, two less so, and one by one he got them out of the smoke and flames. A hero was born in that moment, and no one who knew Sammy is surprised. It is so typical of the good person he was. And as he got the last of them out, the fire raged even further out of control, Sam was trapped and killed. His heroic act, saving four friends cost him his life. 62 fire fighters fought the fire for an hour before bringing it under control, with one of the firemen severely injured as well. Too late for Sam. There is nothing left of the house but shock and memories, Sam’s act of heroism, and the four people he saved and sacrificed his life for.

Although you didn’t know him, I cannot let this boy’s life slip away without saluting him, without sharing his act of heroism with you. My family is overwhelmed by sadness at this loss, his mother who raised such a great boy and human being, his friends who benefited so greatly from his goodness. We salute him now with love and honor, admiration and tears. We will feel the loss forever. The ‘six little Indians’ who were best friends are together again, laughing, making music, celebrating the brief lives they shared with us. There will be a food fight in Heaven, and beautiful music, great writing, the boys who were such good friends are together again. And Sam left us after saving four lives, of grateful friends who will remember him forever with awe for saving their lives and giving up his own to save them.

May he rest in peace, may he be remembered with joy and tenderness and love. We will miss him forever. I could not let him slip away in private sadness, and wanted to share with you the story of this heroic young man. There is another bright star in Heaven now, a bright shiny new one…..Sammy Ewing….the writer, the musician, the devoted son, the beloved friend, the adopted big brother, the boy who teased me and made me laugh as a kid, and touched us all as a man, an extraordinary human being who did what few of us would have the courage to do. Dance on, beloved Sam, may you be remembered forever and forever blessed. And surely, by all of us who knew you, you will be loved for the rest of time.

with all our love, and mine, Danielle

Photos by Eliot Holtzman

The post 7/20/15, Fallen Hero appeared first on daniellesteel.net.

7/20/15, “Fallen Hero”

In the early morning hours of July 4, a hero emerged in an old Victorian home in Los Angeles. The hero was a man I’ve known since he was a boy, named Sam Ewing, known to his friends as Sammy.

I first met Sam in his teens, a wiry funny lively, bright boy, full of life, with a passion and gift for music. He wanted to be a writer when he grew up, and was one of my son Nick’s two very best friends. They met on the music scene when both were playing in bands as kids. Nick’s was on a track toward success, and he and Sammy became fast friends. The boys spent time together, with their other friends, always dedicated to their music, and talented writers. Sammy was always fun, funny, the two were often up to harmless mischief and thought starting food fights among their friends was great sport. They had good years together in their teens, happily chasing girls, constantly playing music. They were part of a group of close ‘guy’ friends, and were a trio of good kids, with another close friend of Nick’s named Max. The three boys were inseparable, and Sammy came on vacation with us several times with our family. As an only child, Sam thoroughly enjoyed and was welcomed into our big family, with siblings both older than Nick, and younger. Sam fit right in and was always welcome and part of the fun.

Sadly, tragedy hit their group early on. Nick’s closest childhood friends fell one by one, to accidents (one hit by a drunk driver while crossing a street in the crosswalk), Nick’s suicide at nineteen. Then their friend Max’s suicide later. One by one, like the ten little Indians, they disappeared. Sammy was 3 years older than the others, and as of three years ago, was the last survivor of the group. He turned 40 in April. And after Nick’s death, he took on the role of stand in big brother to Nick’s younger siblings, a role has continued faithfully, and was particularly kind and attentive to my youngest daughter, trying to stand in for Nick. He worked in my office for 7 years after he finished college, was much loved by all, still played music in various bands at night, and tried to start a budding career as a writer, working on a novel, and writing under the pen name of Sam Winston. He had talent, life, energy, bright ideas, friends and a mother who loved him. He began in San Francisco, and moved to LA in the last year to add new horizons to his life, and worked on the music scene, still writing.

In LA, he moved into an old Victorian house with 4 roommates. And on the night of July 3rd, an electrical fire broke out. Within seconds, the house was filled with heavy black smoke. Sam came out of the house, found himself alone on the street, waiting for the fire department to arrive, and none of his roommates came out. Overwhelmed by the smoke, his 4 roommates were dazed, as Sam saw the house begin to collapse in the flames and smoke. Without hesitating, he rushed back inside, found his roommates, and one by one carried them to safety. Two were critically burned, two less so, and one by one he got them out of the smoke and flames. A hero was born in that moment, and no one who knew Sammy is surprised. It is so typical of the good person he was. And as he got the last of them out, the fire raged even further out of control, Sam was trapped and killed. His heroic act, saving four friends cost him his life. 62 fire fighters fought the fire for an hour before bringing it under control, with one of the firemen severely injured as well. Too late for Sam. There is nothing left of the house but shock and memories, Sam’s act of heroism, and the four people he saved and sacrificed his life for.

Although you didn’t know him, I cannot let this boy’s life slip away without saluting him, without sharing his act of heroism with you. My family is overwhelmed by sadness at this loss, his mother who raised such a great boy and human being, his friends who benefited so greatly from his goodness. We salute him now with love and honor, admiration and tears. We will feel the loss forever. The ‘six little Indians’ who were best friends are together again, laughing, making music, celebrating the brief lives they shared with us. There will be a food fight in Heaven, and beautiful music, great writing, the boys who were such good friends are together again. And Sam left us after saving four lives, of grateful friends who will remember him forever with awe for saving their lives and giving up his own to save them.

May he rest in peace, may he be remembered with joy and tenderness and love. We will miss him forever. I could not let him slip away in private sadness, and wanted to share with you the story of this heroic young man. There is another bright star in Heaven now, a bright shiny new one…..Sammy Ewing….the writer, the musician, the devoted son, the beloved friend, the adopted big brother, the boy who teased me and made me laugh as a kid, and touched us all as a man, an extraordinary human being who did what few of us would have the courage to do. Dance on, beloved Sam, may you be remembered forever and forever blessed. And surely, by all of us who knew you, you will be loved for the rest of time. with all our love, and mine, Danielle

Photos by Eliot Holtzman

The post 7/20/15, “Fallen Hero” appeared first on daniellesteel.net.

7/13/15, Chanel Did It Again!!

Hi Everyone,

It’s that time of year again, the fashion shows in Paris—-more precisely the Haute Couture shows, the shows of clothing that are not Ready to Wear, but are made to order stitch by stitch to the exact measurements of the lucky person who can buy them (and afford them). Haute Couture has always been the summit of high fashion, the most elite and exclusive, available to only a select few clients who can afford them. The creations are remarkable, the clothes unforgettable, and the piece de resistance at the end of the show is always a bridal gown. All of the clothes can be ordered and take several months to make, and clients have two or three fittings before they’re finished to make sure that they fit impeccably.

You can’t just show up at either a Ready to Wear or an Haute Couture show in Paris, it is by invitation only. And the invitations are much coveted and sought after. In days gone by, the front row of the Haute Couture shows were lined with famously well dressed women, the wives of Presidents and Captains of Industry, famous movie stars, women who were known to be the best dressed in each of their countries. The women were usually of a certain age, and the clothes designed accordingly. Dressing in haute couture was not a young women’s sport, it was SERIOUS fashion business, an important business, and the women who wore them were known for how well dressed they were. Now, everything has changed. Haute Couture is a dying art, there are only two of the old venerable famous dress houses who still make haute couture: Dior and Chanel. The others are mostly newcomers. And all of the old important haute couture houses have faded away and closed. Haute Couture fashion week lasted a full week, with 5 or 6 important shows a day. Now it takes two days. And the famous women who lined the front row, jotting down notes of what they wanted to order have been replaced by faces most of us don’t know: Chinese movie stars, members of the press or in public relations, people who love fashion but don’t wear haute couture and never will. One sees a few well dressed women with no idea who they are, and a great many people in exaggerated costumes, desperate for attention. And in all fairness, the prices of Designer Ready to Wear now is what Haute Couture, handmade clothes cost 20 years ago, and Haute Couture prices are now out in the stratosphere for incredible embroideries, beautiful fabrics, and clothes that very few people can afford.

The Haute Couture client is now someone completely different. The women who order these clothes now, very few, are usually very young women, accompanied by much older men, who want to dress their mistresses, wives, or girlfriends in such a way as to enhance their own reputation and demonstrate their fortunes and success. So the clothes are now much younger, often too young for the women who might be able to afford them on their own. But they are still lovely to look at, and the show itself is always fabulous.

Chanel holds both its ready to wear and haute couture shows at a beautiful old glass structure called Le Grand Palais (The Big Palace), and Chanel is famous for its incredible, spectacular decors. They literally transform the location into something else: last year a fun supermarket, with the models wearing colorful clothes, ambling down the aisles. Earlier this year, an old Paris Bistro—–once they had an iceberg plopped right in the middle of the stage, it had been flown in from Sweden and was flown back after the show. And in this season’s Fall Haute Couture show, they transformed the Grand Palais into a casino, complete with carpeting with Chanel’s logo and the suits of playing cards. In the center of the room were gaming tables, and well known movie stars and personalities came out, sat down in evening gowns, and began gambling with real croupiers. Among them, Fabulous Julianne Moore looking spectacular!! And then the show began, as the models walked around the gambling area showing off evening suits, day suits, evening gowns, and a gorgeous white satin pant suit at the end as a Very modern bride!!! The casino set the stage for an atmosphere of fun the minute you walked in. Approximately 60 items of clothing are shown, on beautiful models.

Another interesting factor about the shows, is that fashion is always an unusual but fairly accurate barometer of the world economy. Who is there, who can afford to be, who is spending big money on clothes. For several years now, the Russians have dominated the fashion scene as big spending clients, but there were very, very few in evidence at the most recent show. Their economy is suffering and they seem to be tightening the belt where Haute Couture fashion is concerned. The Chinese are allegedly the biggest spenders now, and there were many of them there. In years past, there were always a handful of very chic Italian women, but their economy is hurting, and I have seen no Italians at the shows in recent years, no Germans, a few Austrians, no British, and only a handful of Americans, who used to buy a great deal of Haute Couture, and I saw no Arab women at this season’s show. Beautiful Saudi women used to come in large family groups but I saw none there. Mostly, I saw women who love fashion, and some men, people who simply love to see the exquisite clothes, even if they’re not clients, and those who follow fashion. It is always exciting to go to the shows. They make one dream of bygone days, where we didn’t wear jeans to everything, and a time when a pair of black pants and a black sweater was not considered enough to wear out to dinner. Our lives are more relaxed now, our wardrobes and fashion needs less demanding. But twice a year, it is still a thrill to see the Haute Couture shows, and Chanel hits a home run every time!!!

love, Danielle

The post 7/13/15, Chanel Did It Again!! appeared first on daniellesteel.net.

7/6/15, I’m Fine!!!???

Hi Everyone,

I hope you had a good week, and that good things are happening. School is almost out, if you’re in school, always a glorious moment, waiting for freedom all summer. Or if you have school age kids, lots to plan to keep them busy all summer!! And hopefully lots of fun things to look forward to!!!

I had a funny experience recently, a conversation with a friend, which made me think about how we react to some of the unpleasant things that happen to us. Good manners and pride lead us to minimize some of the really yucky stuff we go through, and the people around us minimize it too, perhaps to make us feel better about it, or maybe they don’t know what else to say. There is some good in that theory, because we can’t sit around moaning all the time. But you fall flat on your face (or on your hands and knees) on the sidewalk, and with bleeding knees, embarrassed beyond belief, with torn stockings, and seeing stars, you assure everyone of how “fine” you are….no, really, it’s nothing…I’m fine. Really?? When you feel like you’re about to throw up and want to crawl into a hole and put yourself back together without 14 strangers staring at you??? Your boyfriend dumps you, or you break up mutually, and everyone assures you that you’re better off, and you’ll find a MUCH better guy in no time, and it’s a blessing in disguise. (As one of my friends says, I’m looking for a blessing that’s NOT in disguise!!). You get divorced, and your heart feels like it’s in a million pieces, or you lose someone you love some other way, and you assure everyone you’re fine—because it’s too embarrassing or painful to admit that you’re sitting at home crying every night, for a while anyway, and feel like your world will never be the same again. And every one will tell you that it’s better sooner than later, and a great thing that you didn’t lose more time (possibly true, but a miserable experience nonetheless). You lose a job, and again everyone says you’ll find a much better one that uses all your hidden talents, and once again we say we’re fine—-while you’re really thinking, how the hell am I going to pay the mortgage, or the rent, and feed the kids? Dignity induces us to assure the world and ourselves that we’re “fine”, and that’s not entirely a bad thing. Because the world doesn’t come to an end, or shouldn’t, every time something bad happens, and hopefully something good will happen after that. And after the storm, the sun does come out again, and that’s a good thing to remember. But most, or many of us, rarely admit how really shaken up we are by the bad stuff, or how upset we were

I had two unpleasant experiences recently, I was let down by people I trusted profoundly. And the other was an upsetting, unnerving experience that really upset me. And in both situations, I dealt with them sensibly, and calmly, and worked hard at appearing un-upset by it, although I was. I shared both experiences with a friend recently, in a very matter of fact way, not wanting to make a big deal of it (and seem like a whiner or a sissy), and she looked at me in amazement and said “Oh my God, that’s HORRIBLE!!!!” She totally ‘got’ how upset I was, maybe even more than I did. And all of a sudden, it felt okay to admit it, and acknowledge it, and not just try to be ‘grown up’ and polite about it. (I come from a very uptight European background, where you just don’t admit how upset you are, and you deal with it quietly and politely). My friend looked at me and said “that SUCKS”, and I had to laugh….because it did suck, and it was horrible, and all of a sudden I didn’t need to reassure everyone that it was really okay, and I was “fine’. I am fine, but I was damn upset for a while. And sometimes that’s okay. We don’t ALWAYS have to be polite and tell the people closest to us that we’re fine, and what they did wasn’t really so awful. It was liberating to hear her validate my feelings and the experiences….. She was absolutely right, it sucked!!! Sometimes things that happen are horrible, and it’s okay to say that. And hearing someone I respect say that made me feel so much better. So my conclusion is that we don’t always have to say we’re “Fine” if we’re not. (And maybe the people who upset us should know how much they upset us, and be accountable for it). It’s okay not to be fine sometimes. And I suspect that admitting it when things are lousy, even if for a moment, helps us to be really fine in the end, and maybe a lot faster, if we say “this sucks” instead of “I’m fine”!!! It was an interesting insight for me!!!

love, Danielle

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6/29/15, Have a Happy Day!

Hi Everyone,

As you know, I love finding quotes that inspire me. I thought maybe these would inspire you too.

– “Wake up every morning as if something wonderful is about to happen.”

– “Be strong when everything seems to be going wrong. Believe that tomorrow is another day. Believe in miracles.”

– “Do more of what makes YOU happy.”

I hope they inspire you too!!!

love, Danielle

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6/22/15, The Weaker Sex

Hi Everyone,

I hope all is going well for you, and that life is treating you well.

I had one of those Hmmm…..moments today, when I ponder one (or several) of the mysteries of life, or the differences between men and women, or I just contemplate my life and question what I think. One of the differences between men and women that I’ve always noticed, other than the obvious ones, is that you can vent to a woman friend sometimes for hours, share what’s bothering you, and she’ll listen. She may make some suggestions, or just listen, but it’s rare for a woman to impose a solution on another woman. She may tell you how she handled a similar problem, which can be helpful, or offer her thoughts, but it’s rarely done forcefully, a woman friend will remind you of the options, but most women figure that the solution is your decision. But if you tell a man your problems, in just the same way, at the end of what you tell him, he will tell you what you should do in very definite terms. I’ve rarely known a man to be tentative about his suggestions. And most men seem to believe that you are telling him, not just to get his advice or opinion, but so that he can tell you what to do. Most men seem to feel totally frustrated if they can’t suggest a positive action, and his thoughts may be relevant, but not necessarily adapted to your style. And most men also seem to feel slighted if you don’t take their advice and put their plan into action immediately, just as he outlined it. It can create some very awkward situations, where you don’t want to hurt his feelings or insult him, but his suggestion may just not be what you want to do. Most men do not seem to ‘get’ that you may just want to whine, complain, or vent for a bit, and you’re not asking anyone else to solve your problems. It can be a real dilemma between men and woman, and I’ve been in some awkward spots myself, where I really didn’t like the male advice that was offered. I thanked them for their concern, but went on to solve the problem in a way that worked for me. This may be why a lot of women talk to other women about what’s bothering them. There are no ruffled feathers or hurt feelings if you don’t take their advice, or modify it to suit you. Men are more solution-oriented but in a very male way that doesn’t always suit us, even if their advice is full of good intentions, and male solutions. (“Just tell your kids (or husband) they can’t, or should, or have to….etc.” Good luck on that. Just ‘telling’ one’s kids, or husband, or ordering them around is rarely a viable solution for us. It takes a lot more psychology and finesse than that, in my life anyway). And I know I’ve really annoyed some male friends when I didn’t take their advice and follow it immediately, just as they outlined it to me.

I don’t consider myself a feminist, and never have, although I’ve kind of backed into the life of one. I’ve worked since I finished college early at nineteen. I have lived in a male dominated world. I’ve had a career where I’ve had to fight for what I have, and am still doing it. And I was a single mother of nine kids for a long time, and have dealt with all the situations and challenges and made all the decisions that go with it. But basically I was just doing my ‘job’ and what I had to do, at work and at home. It has never been political for me, and I love having a man in my life, and sharing my life. I don’t need to ‘run the show’, to prove a point, but I shoulder my responsibilities. I like the idea of being equal partners, but come from a generation where that was not the norm, and was married to men much older than I who expected to be ‘the boss’. But I really do expect a semblance of equality now, a give and take of ideas and responsibilities, and I balk at being told what to do—-again not out of politics, but simply because I’ve been independent for a long time, and manage decently on my own. But as Winnie the Pooh said to Piglet, “it’s so much friendlier with two”, and indeed it is. As long as one of you isn’t ‘telling’ the other what to do.

Even more annoying are the men whose advice you didn’t seek, who tell you what to do. Men you go out with, or work with, are friends with, or simply know, or barely know. It has really startled me when that happened. Notably, I had my first lunch with a man who worked in finance, and somewhere between the soup and the sandwich, he was telling me how to run my children’s lives financially, what kind of allowance to give them, when to cut them off and make them survive on their own. Maybe good financial advice, but really none of his business, and he didn’t know me well enough to have any idea how I deal with my kids, or my ideas on the subject. I saw him for a second (and last) lunch a month later, and he asked me immediately, “So did you do it?” Did I do what? I had no idea what he was talking about until he asked me if I had followed his advice about my kids’ allowances, how I doled out their money, and he wanted to know if I had made plans to cut them off. Although he was very attractive, I had no desire to see him again, and didn’t. Another male friend I’m very fond of told me and one of my woman friends that we should start charging our kids for meals from the age of 15 on. (Mine would probably have headed for MacDonald’s immediately, which they preferred to my cooking anyway.) And another man I found seriously attractive also had very definite ideas about how I should raise my kids and just how tough I should be. Interestingly none of these three men had children of their own, and I had been managing nine (without too many complaints) for several years. But they had plenty of ideas about how it should be done, and weren’t shy about saying it, and had very black and white (impractical) ideas. The last one in fact complained that I just didn’t do what he “told me to do”. Very observant of him, no, I didn’t. And I realized that I really don’t want to be told what to do.

And more recently, a man I don’t even know, while trying to lure me into a relationship was telling me that he would tell me how to run my kids. Really?? Sayonara and happy trails to you!!! I don’t even ‘run’ my kids at this point in their lives. They run themselves, and I’m grateful when they ask for my advice, and are interested in hearing it.

I have a fairly gentle style, and am not confrontational. But I don’t think I seem incompetent, and as though I’m desperate for free advice. Besides by now I know my kids, their personalities and needs, better than any stranger, or even a friend. But it’s not just about our kids, men seem to offer a lot of unsolicited advice about our finances, our jobs, our homes and our lives, and they often seem to assume that we can’t figure it out on our own. Why is that? Women are surprisingly resilient and strong, and these days we work as hard as any man, and succeed in our chosen fields. We do our jobs, come home and manage our kids, often handle the family finances (more responsibly than our men at times). We keep track of the kids’ vaccinations, help with homework, get the dog to the vet, work until we drop, take care of aging relatives, we do an incredible number of things in a day’s time, handle endless problems, comfort our kids, answer constant emails and texts, problem solve all day long, make decisions, and our day doesn’t end until all the jobs get done. I worked until the day I gave birth with every child, and went back to work not long after. And a lawyer friend of mine just had a baby and was back in her office, and in court four days later. So why is it that we are supposedly the weaker sex? I took my kids trick or treating one year with a fever, but I couldn’t let them down for one of their favorite days of the year. And I manage to keep birthdays and important days straight. And I’m no more unusual than a lot of women who do as much as I, and more. One of my daughters has a grueling hospital job, and goes home to help her kids with their homework, and sends me emails at 3 am, after she gets everything done at home, before leaving for work again at 8 am the next day. We do a double job every day, if we work, both on the job and at home, and that is the norm today for most women, while a man has only one job to do, at the office, and nobody expects him to get the Christmas cards out on time. And somehow we do it. That doesn’t mean we never need advice, or don’t need a good suggestion from time to time. But ‘telling’ us what to do because they think we can’t figure it out really underestimates us.

I have no idea why we’re thought to be the weaker sex. I can’t change a tire, or carry a couch across the room, (although I did carry a hugely heavy chair on my head once when I had no one to help me, put my back out and was in bed for a week!!). I just think we deserve more credit than we get, for being able to do a LOT of things, and many of them well. And yes, we want advice, but not necessarily being ‘told’ what to do. Suggestions are great, and may be followed or not. But I don’t think “the weaker sex” applies to us. We’re all weak at times, but we are incredibly capable too. It would be nice to get credit for that, and all that we do, and the strength that we demonstrate every day, and the endurance. So when we complain, it would be nice if men could listen, and not solve the problem for us. I guess what I’m still seeking is more equality, and acknowledgement for all that we accomplish and tackle in a day’s time, even without free advice. It would be nice….one of these days….have a great week!!

love, Danielle

The post 6/22/15, The Weaker Sex appeared first on daniellesteel.net.

6/22/15 The Weaker Sex

Hi Everyone,

I hope all is going well for you, and that life is treating you well.

I had one of those Hmmm…..moments today, when I ponder one (or several) of the mysteries of life, or the differences between men and women, or I just contemplate my life and question what I think. One of the differences between men and women that I’ve always noticed, other than the obvious ones, is that you can vent to a woman friend sometimes for hours, share what’s bothering you, and she’ll listen. She may make some suggestions, or just listen, but it’s rare for a woman to impose a solution on another woman. She may tell you how she handled a similar problem, which can be helpful, or offer her thoughts, but it’s rarely done forcefully, a woman friend will remind you of the options, but most women figure that the solution is your decision. But if you tell a man your problems, in just the same way, at the end of what you tell him, he will tell you what you should do in very definite terms. I’ve rarely known a man to be tentative about his suggestions. And most men seem to believe that you are telling him, not just to get his advice or opinion, but so that he can tell you what to do. Most men seem to feel totally frustrated if they can’t suggest a positive action, and his thoughts may be relevant, but not necessarily adapted to your style. And most men also seem to feel slighted if you don’t take their advice and put their plan into action immediately, just as he outlined it. It can create some very awkward situations, where you don’t want to hurt his feelings or insult him, but his suggestion may just not be what you want to do. Most men do not seem to ‘get’ that you may just want to whine, complain, or vent for a bit, and you’re not asking anyone else to solve your problems. It can be a real dilemma between men and woman, and I’ve been in some awkward spots myself, where I really didn’t like the male advice that was offered. I thanked them for their concern, but went on to solve the problem in a way that worked for me. This may be why a lot of women talk to other women about what’s bothering them. There are no ruffled feathers or hurt feelings if you don’t take their advice, or modify it to suit you. Men are more solution-oriented but in a very male way that doesn’t always suit us, even if their advice is full of good intentions, and male solutions. (“Just tell your kids (or husband) they can’t, or should, or have to….etc.” Good luck on that. Just ‘telling’ one’s kids, or husband, or ordering them around is rarely a viable solution for us. It takes a lot more psychology and finesse than that, in my life anyway). And I know I’ve really annoyed some male friends when I didn’t take their advice and follow it immediately, just as they outlined it to me.

I don’t consider myself a feminist, and never have, although I’ve kind of backed into the life of one. I’ve worked since I finished college early at nineteen. I have lived in a male dominated world. I’ve had a career where I’ve had to fight for what I have, and am still doing it. And I was a single mother of nine kids for a long time, and have dealt with all the situations and challenges and made all the decisions that go with it. But basically I was just doing my ‘job’ and what I had to do, at work and at home. It has never been political for me, and I love having a man in my life, and sharing my life. I don’t need to ‘run the show’, to prove a point, but I shoulder my responsibilities. I like the idea of being equal partners, but come from a generation where that was not the norm, and was married to men much older than I who expected to be ‘the boss’. But I really do expect a semblance of equality now, a give and take of ideas and responsibilities, and I balk at being told what to do—-again not out of politics, but simply because I’ve been independent for a long time, and manage decently on my own. But as Winnie the Pooh said to Piglet, “it’s so much friendlier with two”, and indeed it is. As long as one of you isn’t ‘telling’ the other what to do.

Even more annoying are the men whose advice you didn’t seek, who tell you what to do. Men you go out with, or work with, are friends with, or simply know, or barely know. It has really startled me when that happened. Notably, I had my first lunch with a man who worked in finance, and somewhere between the soup and the sandwich, he was telling me how to run my children’s lives financially, what kind of allowance to give them, when to cut them off and make them survive on their own. Maybe good financial advice, but really none of his business, and he didn’t know me well enough to have any idea how I deal with my kids, or my ideas on the subject. I saw him for a second (and last) lunch a month later, and he asked me immediately, “So did you do it?” Did I do what? I had no idea what he was talking about until he asked me if I had followed his advice about my kids’ allowances, how I doled out their money, and he wanted to know if I had made plans to cut them off. Although he was very attractive, I had no desire to see him again, and didn’t. Another male friend I’m very fond of told me and one of my woman friends that we should start charging our kids for meals from the age of 15 on. (Mine would probably have headed for MacDonald’s immediately, which they preferred to my cooking anyway.) And another man I found seriously attractive also had very definite ideas about how I should raise my kids and just how tough I should be. Interestingly none of these three men had children of their own, and I had been managing nine (without too many complaints) for several years. But they had plenty of ideas about how it should be done, and weren’t shy about saying it, and had very black and white (impractical) ideas. The last one in fact complained that I just didn’t do what he “told me to do”. Very observant of him, no, I didn’t. And I realized that I really don’t want to be told what to do.

And more recently, a man I don’t even know, while trying to lure me into a relationship was telling me that he would tell me how to run my kids. Really?? Sayonara and happy trails to you!!! I don’t even ‘run’ my kids at this point in their lives. They run themselves, and I’m grateful when they ask for my advice, and are interested in hearing it.

I have a fairly gentle style, and am not confrontational. But I don’t think I seem incompetent, and as though I’m desperate for free advice. Besides by now I know my kids, their personalities and needs, better than any stranger, or even a friend. But it’s not just about our kids, men seem to offer a lot of unsolicited advice about our finances, our jobs, our homes and our lives, and they often seem to assume that we can’t figure it out on our own. Why is that? Women are surprisingly resilient and strong, and these days we work as hard as any man, and succeed in our chosen fields. We do our jobs, come home and manage our kids, often handle the family finances (more responsibly than our men at times). We keep track of the kids’ vaccinations, help with homework, get the dog to the vet, work until we drop, take care of aging relatives, we do an incredible number of things in a day’s time, handle endless problems, comfort our kids, answer constant emails and texts, problem solve all day long, make decisions, and our day doesn’t end until all the jobs get done. I worked until the day I gave birth with every child, and went back to work not long after. And a lawyer friend of mine just had a baby and was back in her office, and in court four days later. So why is it that we are supposedly the weaker sex? I took my kids trick or treating one year with a fever, but I couldn’t let them down for one of their favorite days of the year. And I manage to keep birthdays and important days straight. And I’m no more unusual than a lot of women who do as much as I, and more. One of my daughters has a grueling hospital job, and goes home to help her kids with their homework, and sends me emails at 3 am, after she gets everything done at home, before leaving for work again at 8 am the next day. We do a double job every day, if we work, both on the job and at home, and that is the norm today for most women, while a man has only one job to do, at the office, and nobody expects him to get the Christmas cards out on time. And somehow we do it. That doesn’t mean we never need advice, or don’t need a good suggestion from time to time. But ‘telling’ us what to do because they think we can’t figure it out really underestimates us.

I have no idea why we’re thought to be the weaker sex. I can’t change a tire, or carry a couch across the room, (although I did carry a hugely heavy chair on my head once when I had no one to help me, put my back out and was in bed for a week!!). I just think we deserve more credit than we get, for being able to do a LOT of things, and many of them well. And yes, we want advice, but not necessarily being ‘told’ what to do. Suggestions are great, and may be followed or not. But I don’t think “the weaker sex” applies to us. We’re all weak at times, but we are incredibly capable too. It would be nice to get credit for that, and all that we do, and the strength that we demonstrate every day, and the endurance. So when we complain, it would be nice if men could listen, and not solve the problem for us. I guess what I’m still seeking is more equality, and acknowledgement for all that we accomplish and tackle in a day’s time, even without free advice. It would be nice….one of these days….have a great week!!

love, Danielle

The post 6/22/15 The Weaker Sex appeared first on daniellesteel.net.

6/15/15, A Different Kind of White Magic

Hi Everyone,

I recently had one of those great fun experiences that I love to share with you. I’ve told you before about the White Dinner that I go to in Paris every year. Six people organize it, thousands of people are invited and attend (by invitation only). They are told at roughly 6:30 pm to come to a meeting place bringing a table, 2 chairs, their meal, it must be elegant and not a picnic, and you must be wearing white from head to foot (It was started about 26 years ago, by a naval officer, who invited friends to join him and his wife for their anniversary, in front of one of the monuments in Paris. And it has become an annual tradition since then). You must go to the meeting place at 7:30 pm, you stand around with your friends, or strangers, and at 8:45 pm, you are told the REAL location of the dinner, always about a 5 or 10 minute walk away from the meeting point, (carrying all your equipment, table, chairs and meal). And the dinner is held in front of one of Paris’ spectacular monuments. This was my fourth one, invited by a close friend who invites me every year—-and you are invited as a couple, so there must be two of you—–and I have been to the White Dinner in front of Notre Dame Cathedral (which was beyond spectacular!!), in front of the Louvre amid the glass pyramids all lit up, and last year on the vast lawn in front of the Invalides. The group has gotten so large over the years, that I believe it reached 14,000 by last year, divided into 2 groups, at 2 locations. The remarkable thing about it is that it is kept secret until the last minute, thousands of people show up wearing only white, NO ONE ever tries to crash the event, and with the backdrop of the monuments of Paris, it is an exquisitely beautiful event visually, and everyone behaves impeccably. By 9 pm you reach your final destination.

White Dinner 2015

You set up your table WITH tablecloth and napkins, candles, real plates and glasses and cutlery (NO picnic stuff), and by 9:15 you are seated. It is done with minute precision, when you arrive you are assigned a spot just big enough for your small folding table for two, and you have to set it down where they tell you. You can’t wing it, or decide you prefer a different spot. The table locations are assigned in long, long rows, and when the organizers point to H127, or B223, that’s where you set up, not ten feet away from it, or somewhere else where you spot a friend. The spots are calculated by the inch. The small tables for 2 form a long line of diners, women on one side, men on the other. And as you begin the meal in the festive atmosphere, darkness falls, candles are lit on the tables. And at midnight, you are handed sparklers, you stand and hold them aloft, and the entire location is lit by candlelight and sparklers, a truly dazzling sight. There is music after that if you want to dance. And some years, people have brought beautiful Chinese paper lanterns that they light and sail up into the night sky. And the final rule is that The White Dinner ends at 1 am, at 1am like Cinderella (only an hour later), your stuff must be packed up, you have to leave the location IMMACULATE, not a shred of paper, cigarette butt (it’s France!!), wine cork or so much as a raisin can be lying around where you were. You take your garbage with you, and as the evening ends, there must be NO evidence that anyone was ever there. The event is not to disrespect the city or create clean up work for others, it is to celebrate the beauty of the city, and respect it unfailingly. Every single time I have been, it has been absolutely magical, and one of the most exciting nights of my life. Last year and the year before, I think there were 10,000 people at the location where I was, but it didn’t look like that many. It is NEVER rowdy, but just pure good respectful fun, and it amazes me that no one tries to crash. The night is all about respect, for each other and the city. (The event has been imitated in other cities, but Paris is the original one.

This year, when I spoke to the friend who always invites me, he told me that they were going to try and slim the numbers down, the event had just gotten too big, so fewer people were going to be invited, though still in the thousands. And after the sad terrorist attacks last winter, I asked if there were any security concerns, and my friend admitted that there were some. Paris was tense for many months after those tragic events, but the White Dinner was still on, and the date was set. Technically, it is an ‘illegal’ event, because there are no permits or permissions for it. People arrive en masse to sit down and eat dinner in a public place, but it’s such a benign happy event that the police cruise by it from time to time, but turn a blind eye to it, and don’t interfere. And I have never seen any kind of argument or brawl while there. People are all dressed up and on their best behaviour.

And as always, I got ready for the night with great excitement, figured out what I was going to wear, and the friend I bring every year is a great cook, and plans the food. I provide the table setting, candles, etc. And I will confess that I was a little anxious that something could happen, in the same vein as the attacks earlier this year, but I didn’t want to voice my fears again. So we went to the meeting place, in Les Halles, a somewhat industrial area in the first arrondissement.(I haven’t been at a White Dinner at the Eiffel Tower, and hope I get to do that one day) I couldn’t figure out which monument we were headed to. The crowd still looked pretty big, and at the appointed hour we headed toward the Louvre, the big museum, about a 10 or 15 minute walk from where we were. (And you pull your supplies along in a grocery caddy. And one of you carries the folding table and chairs. Fortunately not me, since mine are very heavy!!)

We headed toward the Louvre Museum (once the palace of The French Court), to dine in what is called “La Cour Carre”, the square courtyard, and you have to access it through a gate. And even before we reached it, word rippled through the crowd: someone, either the police, or the museum people had closed and locked the gates. We were shut out. This was a first!! Now what, as about 6,000 people began to back up, pulling their caddies full of dinner, and folding tables. But guests at the White Dinner are resourceful. I was part of a large group, and they immediately decided to walk another block or two to the Palais Royal, one of the original palaces of Paris in the days of the kings before The Revolution. So we shifted direction and kept walking. There are shops on the ground floor of the Palais Royal now, and apartments on the upper floors, it is a large rectangle with a huge beautiful garden in the middle with gravel areas and paths, and lovely trees within the courtyard. We arrived there, and without specific assignments, people very politely set up their tables in long rows. But it wasn’t quite as orderly as usual, people were startled to have to find an alternate location, and within minutes thousands began to arrive in orderly fashion and set up their tables. Some put them under the trees, which looked like a magical forest once the candles were lit.

Others were out in the open. Everyone found a place to set up, and there must have been four or five thousand people there. It seemed louder than usual, and the rows of tables were a little more free form. Some people had hired small orchestras, and by 9:30 everyone was seated, as always, but it was different in the alternate location, it didn’t quite have the military precision of the past. But in no time at all, everyone was eating dinner by candlelight and had a wonderful time.

So the White Dinner couldn’t be stopped, it had found another beautiful home for the night, and everyone was excited to be there. My group left at midnight instead of 1 am, and we left our area spotless, as I’m sure others did too, following all the rules. So the magic continued after all, and I thought the Palais Royal was even prettier than the Louvre would have been in the Cour Carre. It was a tribute to being resourceful for a night that has great meaning to Parisians, and even visitors. As they always do, several people had flown in from other countries around Europe, England, Poland, Italy, Spain, one couple flies in from India every year. It is always a special night, and it was this year too…even if the location wasn’t the one originally planned. And with the true magic of the night, the weather was perfect, balmy and warm, although storms had been predicted. And five minutes after I got home, still marveling at the beauty of the night, I heard the rain begin outside my windows. Even the rain held off until the White Dinner was over, with great respect for the thousands of diners…what a beautiful night…it always is, even if slightly different this year. The White Dinner never lets us down. And the magic is always there to thrill us all!!!

love, Danielle

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