Susan Buffum's Blog: Welcome to My World, page 25
March 29, 2016
Tonight I Am Screaming
Things went very well this evening as I finished editing the partial novel. I added a couple chapters. I developed the characters some more. I edited everything that had been written, winding up with 33,000 plus words, 64 single-spaced pages all freshly printed out when I was finished at 9:30PM.
I took a break and relaxed.
During this R&R period I remembered a legal pad with some pages of notes I'd written three or so years ago when developing this novel and these characters. I seldom write notes so didn't pay too much attention to them.
I grabbed the pad and began reading the notes. A lot of the notes had been check marked in the past as the ideas had been developed and made a part of the text.
And then it hit me that the current novel was not going in the direction these hastily written notes had indicated it was to go. Things had moved too quickly, the plot tension was missing, the friction wasn't happening...and so I screamed- NOOOOOOOO!
I probably screamed loud enough that half the civilized world heard me. It was that kind of gut wrenching, soul shattering scream that only a creator can produce when their creation crashes and burns. Picture a potter at his or her wheel, the wheel spinning, wet hands shaping the clay, molding it, guiding it, making it beautiful in form and substance before firing it in the kiln- and suddenly the clay begins to wobble, and then it collapses and the beauty that you could see, feel and envision is suddenly nothing more than a lump of wet clay going around and around on the wheel. Ouch- that hurts.
I have 64-pages of Ouch in a binder, all nicely edited, only it's going nowhere but eventually into the recycle bin.
I am bitterly disappointed. I've screamed it out and feel calmer now (the screaming was actually all done in my head, by the way- no living being's hearing was damaged by the high decibel level involved). Now, I'll go to bed and not think about it anymore today.
Tomorrow I'll open a new document in Word and begin writing this novel again from the very first word. This time I'll coax the story that I wanted to tell onto the pages. Hopefully it will go better the second time around.
I took a break and relaxed.
During this R&R period I remembered a legal pad with some pages of notes I'd written three or so years ago when developing this novel and these characters. I seldom write notes so didn't pay too much attention to them.
I grabbed the pad and began reading the notes. A lot of the notes had been check marked in the past as the ideas had been developed and made a part of the text.
And then it hit me that the current novel was not going in the direction these hastily written notes had indicated it was to go. Things had moved too quickly, the plot tension was missing, the friction wasn't happening...and so I screamed- NOOOOOOOO!
I probably screamed loud enough that half the civilized world heard me. It was that kind of gut wrenching, soul shattering scream that only a creator can produce when their creation crashes and burns. Picture a potter at his or her wheel, the wheel spinning, wet hands shaping the clay, molding it, guiding it, making it beautiful in form and substance before firing it in the kiln- and suddenly the clay begins to wobble, and then it collapses and the beauty that you could see, feel and envision is suddenly nothing more than a lump of wet clay going around and around on the wheel. Ouch- that hurts.
I have 64-pages of Ouch in a binder, all nicely edited, only it's going nowhere but eventually into the recycle bin.
I am bitterly disappointed. I've screamed it out and feel calmer now (the screaming was actually all done in my head, by the way- no living being's hearing was damaged by the high decibel level involved). Now, I'll go to bed and not think about it anymore today.
Tomorrow I'll open a new document in Word and begin writing this novel again from the very first word. This time I'll coax the story that I wanted to tell onto the pages. Hopefully it will go better the second time around.
March 27, 2016
Creating a World in a Day
Today I baked a batch of tollhouse cookies and created a world in which my characters will live their lives.
March 25, 2016
Paying Attention to Dreams
I had a dream last night- well several, actually- but this dream was about a novel that I'd started over a year ago. So I dug out my retired netbook and searched the files on it to locate this partially written novel, copied it and put it on my current laptop. Tomorrow I will do a read through of the nearly 30,000 words written so far and then continue writing this weekend.
This book is more along the line of My Magical Life in theme and tone. This one is about modern day witches in a rural, seacoast New England village, but I'll have to read it through to see where I was heading with it. And then I'll let it write itself from there once my internal compass is set again.
The other dream I had involved my cats. Both of them have spring fever and want to go outside desperately. I dreamt a strange cat came to the back door and Revere wanted to go outside to play with it. I wouldn't let him. The cat went away and then came back with a small cat and two other adult cats- one of them I recognized as a neighbor's cat (now deceased) that had been friends with our late cat Marty. Smoky's back was shaved in a big oval and I could see black stitched up wounds. He'd been attacked by a wild animal several times during his lifetime, so this was not unusual. Both of my cats got out when I opened the door to let Smoky in. I managed to get Riley and the strange small cat back indoors but Revere raced down the deck stairs to the back yard with Smoky and the other two cats- to the serviceberry tree beside the shed which is easy to climb. I heard the fox barking in the woods and called Revere but he took off across the back yard with the other cats following him, going down the path into the woods. I ran after him, past the three cats and into the woods. In reality there is a ravine with a brook flowing through it. In the dream the ravine was just a shallow descent to the muddy, overflowing brook. The fox was splashing about a foot from shore in he water, barking and heading toward where I knew Revere was in the skunk cabbage. So I had the fox in front of me and Revere to my right. I was calling the cat but he wasn't obeying me and I was getting nervous and upset thinking the fox was going to kill my cat right in front of me....and that woke me up. Revere was lying right beside me across my arm, and Beans was against my right leg- both of them were fine, but the dream left me feeling uneasy.
Of course Revere wanted to go outside today every time the door opened- but there is no way he's going outdoors! I listen to my dreams and pay attention to what they tell me, and this one clearly told me not to let either cat outdoors, especially Revere!
So- Rookdale it will be (it has had two other titles- The Cat's Tale and Cooper's Moon) so I'm not sure which one I'll go with, or if it will get a finished work title when it's done. Will just have to wait and see!
This book is more along the line of My Magical Life in theme and tone. This one is about modern day witches in a rural, seacoast New England village, but I'll have to read it through to see where I was heading with it. And then I'll let it write itself from there once my internal compass is set again.
The other dream I had involved my cats. Both of them have spring fever and want to go outside desperately. I dreamt a strange cat came to the back door and Revere wanted to go outside to play with it. I wouldn't let him. The cat went away and then came back with a small cat and two other adult cats- one of them I recognized as a neighbor's cat (now deceased) that had been friends with our late cat Marty. Smoky's back was shaved in a big oval and I could see black stitched up wounds. He'd been attacked by a wild animal several times during his lifetime, so this was not unusual. Both of my cats got out when I opened the door to let Smoky in. I managed to get Riley and the strange small cat back indoors but Revere raced down the deck stairs to the back yard with Smoky and the other two cats- to the serviceberry tree beside the shed which is easy to climb. I heard the fox barking in the woods and called Revere but he took off across the back yard with the other cats following him, going down the path into the woods. I ran after him, past the three cats and into the woods. In reality there is a ravine with a brook flowing through it. In the dream the ravine was just a shallow descent to the muddy, overflowing brook. The fox was splashing about a foot from shore in he water, barking and heading toward where I knew Revere was in the skunk cabbage. So I had the fox in front of me and Revere to my right. I was calling the cat but he wasn't obeying me and I was getting nervous and upset thinking the fox was going to kill my cat right in front of me....and that woke me up. Revere was lying right beside me across my arm, and Beans was against my right leg- both of them were fine, but the dream left me feeling uneasy.
Of course Revere wanted to go outside today every time the door opened- but there is no way he's going outdoors! I listen to my dreams and pay attention to what they tell me, and this one clearly told me not to let either cat outdoors, especially Revere!
So- Rookdale it will be (it has had two other titles- The Cat's Tale and Cooper's Moon) so I'm not sure which one I'll go with, or if it will get a finished work title when it's done. Will just have to wait and see!
March 23, 2016
Miss Peculiar's Haunting Tales IV
This is probably my most popular series- the Miss Peculiar's Haunting Tales, Volume I-III. I am currently tinkering with the stories I've written and put together for volume IV. It will be released later this year- not exactly sure when.
I was reading through some of the stories last night, tweaking them to get them just right, and discovered the chilling predecessor to My Magical Life in a story called Artistic Impressions. Similar theme about immortal lovers reborn again and again through time after violent murder...only here the male character is more sinister than Ardis, the undead (he doesn't like being called a vampire) lover of witch Evangeline in My Magical Life. Artistic Impressions was written a few years before Ardis and Evangeline came forth wanting their story to be told.
Edgar Allan Poe and Shirley Jackson remain the biggest influences on my writing in these tales. Poe could be chilling and spooky but he also had a flair for humor if you've read all of his work, not just the stories assigned in high school and college literary classes like The Black Cat, The Raven, The Fall of the House of Usher, etc. I have always been a fan of Shirley Jackson's- and she too wrote some chilling and eerie stories and then she wrote Raising Demons and other humorous stories based on her family life. If there was a dead literary giants club where living authors could go and spend time in conversation with late writers I would definitely seek out Poe and Jackson and sit with them awhile. We'd be the little clique laughing and screaming in a dark corner of the room, and maybe shedding a few tears.
Shirley Jackson in particular had a way of taking an ordinary day and giving it a sharp twist into the surreal.
Will keep perfecting the stories I've chosen for volume IV and will give you all a heads up when it makes its debut.
I was reading through some of the stories last night, tweaking them to get them just right, and discovered the chilling predecessor to My Magical Life in a story called Artistic Impressions. Similar theme about immortal lovers reborn again and again through time after violent murder...only here the male character is more sinister than Ardis, the undead (he doesn't like being called a vampire) lover of witch Evangeline in My Magical Life. Artistic Impressions was written a few years before Ardis and Evangeline came forth wanting their story to be told.
Edgar Allan Poe and Shirley Jackson remain the biggest influences on my writing in these tales. Poe could be chilling and spooky but he also had a flair for humor if you've read all of his work, not just the stories assigned in high school and college literary classes like The Black Cat, The Raven, The Fall of the House of Usher, etc. I have always been a fan of Shirley Jackson's- and she too wrote some chilling and eerie stories and then she wrote Raising Demons and other humorous stories based on her family life. If there was a dead literary giants club where living authors could go and spend time in conversation with late writers I would definitely seek out Poe and Jackson and sit with them awhile. We'd be the little clique laughing and screaming in a dark corner of the room, and maybe shedding a few tears.
Shirley Jackson in particular had a way of taking an ordinary day and giving it a sharp twist into the surreal.
Will keep perfecting the stories I've chosen for volume IV and will give you all a heads up when it makes its debut.
March 22, 2016
About Mr. Needy
A reader/reviewer mentioned Mr. Needy who is a character in a short story titled Drakes Fall Manor in Miss Peculiar's Haunting Tales, Volume 1.
He is one of my favorite characters, and also the character in a story who surprised me the most once the story was written and I'd read it through for the first time.
Mr. Needy originated in an actual dream that I had about a being that lived inside the walls of a house.
I developed him from there as I wrote the story (he's not exactly like the more nightmarish being of my dream). I thought that he was creepy and sinister. But once the whole story was written and I'd read it through several times trying to perfect his manner of speech I was stunned to discover that something entirely different was happening in that story from what I'd thought was going on. Mr. Needy actually seems like the nicest character in the story when all is said and done. If you carefully examine each human character you find that they all have some pretty disturbing qualities- a mostly absent father who abandons his wife and daughter, a woman who puts herself and her needs above her child's and seeks to have her daughter committed to get her out of her way, a young girl on the cusp of womanhood who is lonely, has been the victim of a particularly nasty nanny and has been a vengeful little brat, a livery driver who carves evil little fetishes, and a brother and sister who aren't quite right but who run an asylum....Mr. Needy, who quietly lives inside the walls of the house with his hound, collecting little odds and ends in his forays outside the walls, is really not the creepiest character in that story when all is said and done- although when I sat down to write it, he was supposed to be just that!
This is a good example of how a writer can create a character, but the character begins to mold him or herself within the text and forward motion of the story, sometimes becoming a completely different character than what he/she started out to be.
And that's why I love being a writer- life is full of surprises every day.
He is one of my favorite characters, and also the character in a story who surprised me the most once the story was written and I'd read it through for the first time.
Mr. Needy originated in an actual dream that I had about a being that lived inside the walls of a house.
I developed him from there as I wrote the story (he's not exactly like the more nightmarish being of my dream). I thought that he was creepy and sinister. But once the whole story was written and I'd read it through several times trying to perfect his manner of speech I was stunned to discover that something entirely different was happening in that story from what I'd thought was going on. Mr. Needy actually seems like the nicest character in the story when all is said and done. If you carefully examine each human character you find that they all have some pretty disturbing qualities- a mostly absent father who abandons his wife and daughter, a woman who puts herself and her needs above her child's and seeks to have her daughter committed to get her out of her way, a young girl on the cusp of womanhood who is lonely, has been the victim of a particularly nasty nanny and has been a vengeful little brat, a livery driver who carves evil little fetishes, and a brother and sister who aren't quite right but who run an asylum....Mr. Needy, who quietly lives inside the walls of the house with his hound, collecting little odds and ends in his forays outside the walls, is really not the creepiest character in that story when all is said and done- although when I sat down to write it, he was supposed to be just that!
This is a good example of how a writer can create a character, but the character begins to mold him or herself within the text and forward motion of the story, sometimes becoming a completely different character than what he/she started out to be.
And that's why I love being a writer- life is full of surprises every day.
March 20, 2016
Talon Book Three Written!
Well, I guess once I put my mind to something I can get things done. The third book in the Talon trilogy has been sitting partially written in a binder in a file box in the dining room for some time (over a year). After working on two other novels and burning out somewhat on both, and then struggling with issues related to my husband's loss of job and feeling rather aimless, I decided on the 18th to go ahead and finish this third book (after rereading the first book in the series). I wrote from 7:30PM Friday night until 1:30AM Saturday morning. I wrote some more yesterday afternoon from 3PM until 6PM, and then 7:30PM until 11:30PM. Today I sat down to write at about 1PM after lunch and basically only stopped to eat dinner around 6PM. At about 9:25PM I typed the final sentence. Overall- about 20.5 hours to write the last half of a novel. Sometimes it just goes like that (I thought I was 2/3s done but I just looked at the page count again and it jumped from 64 to 121 since Friday when I started writing, so that's almost half!)
This huge writing session today really put me through the emotional wringer. As stated previously, I am not the kind of writer who sits down and plots, plans and outlines my books. They just come straight out of my head and I do not know what's going to happen until I type it- so I am sitting at the kitchen table this afternoon literally sobbing as I'm typing because an unexpected guest showed up at Bryce and Talon's wedding- entirely out of the blue- but it worked in the story but caught me by surprise. Then tonight as they entered the elevator to go upstairs to begin their honeymoon the story abruptly veered off into a climatic scene that also made me cry. I didn't see this coming ether. Talon's last words to Bryce in the elevator are, "I'm dying." and then he disappears. I won't be writing any spoilers here, so that's pretty much all I can say right now.
I wonder how many other writers write like I do- not really knowing where the characters are taking me, always being surprised, and sitting at the table laughing out loud or sobbing my heart out as I'm typing? My husband says, "There's medicine for this, you know." And I say, "Oh, you don't really understand. Writing is good medicine, and so is reading! Read the book!" (I don't think he's read any of my books because they aren't the Cusslers and Pattersons he likes.) And Kelly just shakes her head, but I can guarantee that when she reads it she'll be grabbing for the tissues herself and laughing in other places.
Now I just need to come up with a title for this one. (It will include the bonus Christmas story Talon: Familiar Territory at the end- I don't remember if I noted that here or in my other author blog elsewhere on the internet.)
This huge writing session today really put me through the emotional wringer. As stated previously, I am not the kind of writer who sits down and plots, plans and outlines my books. They just come straight out of my head and I do not know what's going to happen until I type it- so I am sitting at the kitchen table this afternoon literally sobbing as I'm typing because an unexpected guest showed up at Bryce and Talon's wedding- entirely out of the blue- but it worked in the story but caught me by surprise. Then tonight as they entered the elevator to go upstairs to begin their honeymoon the story abruptly veered off into a climatic scene that also made me cry. I didn't see this coming ether. Talon's last words to Bryce in the elevator are, "I'm dying." and then he disappears. I won't be writing any spoilers here, so that's pretty much all I can say right now.
I wonder how many other writers write like I do- not really knowing where the characters are taking me, always being surprised, and sitting at the table laughing out loud or sobbing my heart out as I'm typing? My husband says, "There's medicine for this, you know." And I say, "Oh, you don't really understand. Writing is good medicine, and so is reading! Read the book!" (I don't think he's read any of my books because they aren't the Cusslers and Pattersons he likes.) And Kelly just shakes her head, but I can guarantee that when she reads it she'll be grabbing for the tissues herself and laughing in other places.
Now I just need to come up with a title for this one. (It will include the bonus Christmas story Talon: Familiar Territory at the end- I don't remember if I noted that here or in my other author blog elsewhere on the internet.)
March 19, 2016
Up Late Last Night
Since deciding to go ahead and finish Book Three in the Talon (grim reaper) series I burned the midnight oil last night, writing until nearly 1:30AM before staggering off to bed and crashing until 9:30Am this morning (with Revere). I had some stuff to accomplish with John today- a run to Dave's for cat food and cat litter and then a trip to Deerfield to the candy shop there to get some candy for Kelly for Easter, and some of their awesome butterscotch buttons for the jar on the kitchen table where she and I work a lot. Revere got to go out briefly to enjoy the beautiful weather (snow is supposed to be coming on Monday!) We hiked around the back yard picking up sticks, chasing acorns and in his case, eating some grass (I passed on that). Then John joining us scared him and he bolted back to the house, going under the deck and then between the house and fence into the front yard. So John had to hike around the house to grab him before he ran into the road (he is for the most part an indoor cat with brief supervised outdoor privileges). Since bringing him indoors I've been working on the book, and as usual, having no idea in mind when I sat down to move forward with it, it has led me to some interesting places. And now, it is Dr. Giles Talon and Bryce Briscoe's wedding day at last- I think this will be written in two chapters-14 & 15 and then they are off to Paris, the Bordeaux region and then Italy where they may encounter old world demons during their honeymoon...don't know how this one will end. As always, it will be a surprise even to me! (I think I put the character in character driven fiction because they drive the story, not me!)
Two Freda Warringtons
A drug rep came into the medical office where I work. Alec is a fan of The Archetypes-First Generation and really likes the character of Beans. He bought a second copy to give to a friend for Christmas, which was nice. But earlier this week his brought his district manager in to meet me, and introduced me as not just a medical secretary but a writer. Then this district manager says he has a funny story to share with me. His mother-in-law, who lives in Saratoga, NY shares a name with an author from the UK. He then proceeded to tell me that his mother-in-law's name is Freda Warrington and I think my jaw dropped. Only two weeks ago I was at Barnes & Noble with Kelly. A book practically leapt off the shelf into my hands and came home with me- A Taste of Blood Wine by- you guessed it- UK author Freda Warrington! When the UK Warrington comes to the US she visits the Saratoga Freda Warrington and stays at her house. What an amazing coincidence that I had never heard of Freda Warrington, the UK author, until that book jumped out at me- it's about vampires- and two weeks and two days later I meet another Freda Warrington's son-in-law and he tells me this amazing story! He said he'd tell me the next time the UK Freda Warrington is visiting and said it would be great if I drove to Saratoga to meet both Fredas! It's only a couple of hours away from where I live in western MA.) I am still mind boggled, but things have a way of happening.
Last October John and I were vacationing in Wells, ME and one of my favorite authors, Darynda Jones, happened to be vacationing in ME in Portland...and we seemed to be shadowing one another in the places we visited. Unfortunately, John and I got lost due to road construction when we went antiquing in an area we weren't familiar with, so I ended up missing a hastily arranged meet & greet and book signing at her Portland hotel- I was bitterly disappointed. I even had a few of my books in the car to give her- they had been under the seat for whatever reason...but unfortunately that never happened.
Although this is a really big world there are times when it seems cozy and small.
Last October John and I were vacationing in Wells, ME and one of my favorite authors, Darynda Jones, happened to be vacationing in ME in Portland...and we seemed to be shadowing one another in the places we visited. Unfortunately, John and I got lost due to road construction when we went antiquing in an area we weren't familiar with, so I ended up missing a hastily arranged meet & greet and book signing at her Portland hotel- I was bitterly disappointed. I even had a few of my books in the car to give her- they had been under the seat for whatever reason...but unfortunately that never happened.
Although this is a really big world there are times when it seems cozy and small.
March 18, 2016
Talon Book Three
After flip-flopping around between unfinished novels I've decided to finally finish the third book in the Talon grim reaper series which is about 2/3 done. I like the dynamics between the characters and there is a lot going on in this third novel as Talon struggles to get all the protection Bryce's human family requires in place after an oversight leads to the death of Brittany's boyfriend. Bryce faces a powerful demon who nearly destroys her just days before her wedding to icy Dr. Giles Talon (who also happens to be a smoking hot reaper), and once again she has rocked the Heavens with her calculated but risky behavior when she slingshots her infant son forward in time to destroy an enemy and then, before he loses his adult form, backwards in time to rescue his father who is facing his own powerful enemy in a multi-prong attack on the reaper and his unique portal who is also an angel. Hopefully they'll make it to the altar in this book!
March 16, 2016
Floundering Around
Since my husband lost his job I can't seem to focus on anything for long. I had the day off so ran to Southampton to mail the seven giveaway copies of Cupid's Darts to the winners. Then I came home and did some edits to the new novel but really couldn't concentrate, so I fixed up a few typos n Talon: An Intimate Familiarity which I'd just finished rereading last night. That led me to searching through the computer files for the unfinished book three in the series. After a run to Staples to drop off the Massachusetts State Button Society Bulletin to be printed (only managed a 30 page magazine this year instead of the usual 42 pages but did my best with what was submitted before the deadline), I came home and began overhauling what I have of book three. It perked me up because there is such are such awesome dynamics among the characters- and in this book we learn more about Bryce's family and how Talon must protect them as well as Bryce and their son. And they finally get married in this book. This may be the final book, making the series a trilogy. I have a Christmas story to add at the end, something I do in my series novels and in the occasional stand alone novel because that's how my writing started, with Christmas stories annually for family and friends...it's just my thing, and these stories exist because my family and friends have read the books and are familiar with the characters, but anyone who hasn't read the books wouldn't quite get a good grasp of the characters, so I add these stories to the books. Therefore, at the end of this third novel will be the Christmas story set five years into the future- and let me tell you, the grim reaper struggles just like any human father, to build a scooter for his son on Christmas Eve, but he has a truly awesome gift for Bryce...that, if truth be told, opens a door to a fourth book in the future.
So, my floundering around led to some actual work tonight. The worst part of the evening was UPS delivering the contents of my husband's desk from work- two large cartons. His company just packs up his stuff and ships it- looks like they just threw everything not theirs into the cartons without particular care...and that is both disgusting and sad, not to mention further upsetting to him, that he means so little to them after 32 plus years that they treat his personal belongings with so little regard. They should have just given him half an hour to pack up his stuff himself before shoving him out the door! So much for that "thoughtful, respectful" manner MassMutual treats it's employees whose jobs they've simply eliminated. Maybe the CEO with the obscene salary should personally deliver these eliminated employees' personal belongings- I bet it would be a learning experience for him!
I need to stop before I get myself going any further...so, jumping off my soap box and going to bed now. Goodnight!
So, my floundering around led to some actual work tonight. The worst part of the evening was UPS delivering the contents of my husband's desk from work- two large cartons. His company just packs up his stuff and ships it- looks like they just threw everything not theirs into the cartons without particular care...and that is both disgusting and sad, not to mention further upsetting to him, that he means so little to them after 32 plus years that they treat his personal belongings with so little regard. They should have just given him half an hour to pack up his stuff himself before shoving him out the door! So much for that "thoughtful, respectful" manner MassMutual treats it's employees whose jobs they've simply eliminated. Maybe the CEO with the obscene salary should personally deliver these eliminated employees' personal belongings- I bet it would be a learning experience for him!
I need to stop before I get myself going any further...so, jumping off my soap box and going to bed now. Goodnight!
Welcome to My World
Here I will write a little bit about my writing, how I write, how I create characters and environments...and maybe some little glimpses into my real life because writers and authors are real people af
...more
- Susan Buffum's profile
- 71 followers
