Ikram Hawramani's Blog, page 30

She wants to convert to Islam while enjoying her bisexual lifestyle

Hello, possible convert here. I have one issue and it's this. I'm a bisexual teenage girl, I've enjoyed a relationship with another girl and I don't want to suppress that part of me or rule out the possibility of marrying a girl. I've read some of your articles on LGBT+ stuff in Islam and that's one of the only things I find to be an obstacle in this. I don't want to suppress that side or be ashamed of it, so I'm not quite sure what to do.

Hello,

The point of religion is to find out how to be an ideal servant of God. If God exists and if He does not approve of homosexual relationships then there is no recourse. There is no higher power that can make it OK. So it is a question of whether you prefer God’s wishes to your own or not. I do not doubt that homosexual relationships can be highly satisfying and meaningful, and I do not doubt that for some people homosexual relationships can be far more satisfying than heterosexual ones. But the purpose of this life is not the attaining of personal satisfaction. The purpose of this life, as the Quran tells us, is for us to worship God:

I did not create the jinn and the humans except to worship Me. (The Quran, verse 51:56)

This life is not meant to be Paradise. It is meant to be a place where we suppress many of our deepest desires for the sake of God, expecting His reward in the afterlife. Those who prefer Paradise to their desires are rewarded, while those who prefer their desires to Paradise are punished.

As for him who was defiant.

And preferred the life of this world.

Then Hell is the shelter.

But as for him who feared the Standing of his Lord, and restrained the self from desires.

Then Paradise is the shelter. (The Quran, verses 79:37-41)

We could wish to be in more benign world where we could follow our desires and still get rewarded. But whether we like it or not, we are stuck in a terrible game where the stakes are infinitely high; depending on our performance in this life, we will either get infinite rewards or infinite punishment. There is no way to escape this game and withdraw from it. We have to accept it as it is and try to attain success in it whether we like it or not.

So when it comes to someone who likes Islam but strongly prefers homosexual relationships, they will have to make a choice between the two; either preferring the satisfaction of this life or the next.

Best wishes.

OCD is making their practice of Islam difficult

Selam I have a problem I suffer from OCD scrupulosity aspect of it. To be honest my personal relationship to Islam is so messed up I don't know where to start. With my prayer and wudu I am in constant doubt. I repeat multiple times because i think I passed gas or ect. I find no peace what so ever, it has become quite an agony. I feel completely overburden with rules too. How to eat how to sleep how to enter bathroom ect. At night I don't sleep cause I constantly think i must make dua/zikr to GOD to thank him. I get up and face mekkah (not sure if I have to for dua) but i feel I must do wudu also. Of course by then I am awake and cant sleep. My job has big responsibility I am afraid I will make mistake. I am so tired from lack of sleep. I must be honest I am thinking about giving up on Islam. I read what these sheikhs have to say and its all about haram all the time. I feel so overburden, I don't want to leave my faith but I just can't go on like this anymore. I have read, though by some Shia scholars who say that person that suffers OCD should not repeat prayer or clean the impurity like urine even if person believes he is certain of it due to the nature of disease OCD. That could help me but not sure if that ruling is OK. Please if you can offer some advice I would appreciate it.

Alaikumassalam wa rahmatullah,

I strongly recommend that you get medical help. There are drugs that can help greatly with your condition. It is abnormal to worry about the Islamic way of eating, sleeping and entering the bathroom; these are all recommended things, not obligatory, so you do not have to worry about them. It is not Islam that is at fault, it is your mental condition. So your first focus should be on addressing your condition through medical help.

You can also search online for supplements for OCD. Buy them and give them a try.

I also recommend that you read the Quran daily and make it the center of your life. Stop worrying about the unimportant things and focus on what the Quran tells you.

Also see the previous articles on: Islam and OCD (Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder)

Best wishes.

The ruling on women riding alone in a taxi car or motorcycle

Salaam. In my country, there is this public transportation service called ojeg (pronounced OH-JACK). It is basically a motorcycle taxi that only counts to 1 passenger per motorcycle unit. In Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) times, he rode a camel together with a woman behind him, with a note that the Prophet and the woman rode the same camel, but the camel hump separates them two. When I took a ride with an ojeg, which majority of them are male riders, is it similar to when our Prophet rode a camel and gave a women a ride with him? The difference is it was then using a living creature with a hump and it is now using a mechanical transportation with nothing to separate the rider and the passenger. I have gotten opinions from several of the local ustadh, but most of them agree that it is not allowed for a woman to take an ojeg ride. They also do not allow woman to take a taxi ride alone. The ojeg riders and taxi drivers in my country are all harmless and take their passenger with utmost manner and no bad intentions at all, but those ustadh are saying that it is not allowed for us women to do a ride alone. I am completely cannot relate to their opinion. How do you perceive of this matter? Thank you very much for your time. May Allah Bless you.

Alaikumassalam wa rahmatullah,

There are different opinions on this issue. According to the Palestinian scholar Dr. Ziyad Miqdad this is no a matter in which the ruling of either halal or halam applies (i.e. it is not a black and white issue). In his opinion if the woman’s safety and dignity are guaranteed, then there is no issue with a woman riding alone in a taxi.

Shaykh al-Albani’s opinion is that if the following three conditions are satisfied, then it is permitted for a woman to ride alone in a taxi:

The ride should be “in the middle of the city” (he probably means that the ride should not be to an isolated or out of the way place, or to a different city).The driver should be a religiously observant person.The woman should be safe from kidnapping.

According to both al-Albani and the Jordanian Fatwa Authority, a woman’s riding in a taxi is not a form of khalwa (being alone with the opposite sex) that is forbidden, since a taxi is a public place due to not providing much privacy from the public. By bringing these opinions together, I believe we can express the requirements for such rides being permissible as follows: If the woman’s safety and dignity is preserved, and if such a ride is acceptable in her society and culture and is not considered scandalous, then it is permitted.

I believe al-Albani’s requirements that the ride should be in the city center and with a religious person are only heuristic recommendations meant to ensure a woman’s safety and dignity. If her safety and dignity are preserved in another way, then these requirements will not be necessary (for example by riding in a car that belongs to a company that carefully monitors its drivers and perhaps has a video camera inside the car).

As for riding on a motorcycle, the same rulings would apply. If her safety and dignity is preserved, and if such a ride is not considered scandalous in her society, and if there is no physical contact involved, then it may be acceptable.

Article from Felesteen Online that mentions these opinions (Arabic PDF)Fatwa from the Jordanian Fatwa Authority (Arabic PDF)

On the Prophet PBUH cursing those who cross-dress

Salam alaikum. Brother, what is the context of a hadith that says Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) curses men who wear women's clothes and women who wear men's clothes? Could it be taken literally or is there any condition that applies to the hadith to take effect? Thank you.

The relevant hadiths do not provide much context, so it is left to the scholars to interpret them:

The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) cursed the man who dressed like a woman and the woman who dressed like a man.

Sunan Abi Dawud 4098 (Considered sahhi by al-Albani)

Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) cursed those men who are in the similitude (assume the manners) of women and those women who are in the similitude (assume the manners) of men.

Sahih al-Bukhari 5885

The common interpretation is that it is forbidden to intentionally act or dress in a way that is like the opposite sex. While some interpret this as meaning that, for example, women should not wear pants since pants are commonly worn by men, the proper interpretation I believe is that people should act or dress in a way that in their particular time and culture would make them look like the opposite sex. So it is not referring to any particular style of behavior or clothing, it is referring to anything that might confuse others as to one’s sex in their time and culture.

Should you repeat the salah if you forget a raka?

If I accidentally pray only 3 rakats for a 4 rakat Salah would I need to repeat the prayer

If you forget one of the essential parts of salah, such as a raka, and some time passes, and later you remember and know with certainty that your salah was deficient, then you must redo the salah.

References

Related fatwa from the Qatari Fatwa Authority (Arabic PDF)

Can you be a good Muslim woman without wearing the hijab?

Can I be a good muslim woman without a hijab?

Not wearing hijab is like any other small sin; we all have our sins. You can still practice Islam and plan in your heart to one day wear the hijab when you have the strength of character to do it. But there is no way to be a perfect Muslim as a woman without wearing the hijab because your submission to God will always be flawed and lacking. There is no way out of this situation without wearing the hijab, since wearing the hijab is an obligation and there is no way to make it go away.

But God is merciful and forgiving and He may accept your excuses if you sincerely wish to wear the hijab and plan do it when you can. But this is not an ideal situation to be in, since we must all strive to be as perfect in our faith as possible.

Repenting from using magic

I have a relative who got someone to do black magic on her son in order for him to stay with his wife. What is the punishment in Islam and will my relative be forgiven as they didn’t mean any harm

It is sufficient for her to sincerely seek repentance and God will accept it inshaAllah.

References:

Fatwa from the Qatari Fatwa Authority (Arabic PDF)

Having long nails in Islam

In Islam how long can my nails be?

It is part of the Sunna (the Prophet’s tradition PBUH) to have short nails, so the scholarly community considers having long nails to be makrūh (“disliked”). This means that having long nails is not forbidden, but it is not recommended.

References:

Fatwa from the Qatari Fatwa Authority (Arabic PDF)

Should women cover their feet during prayer (salah)?

As salam alaikum, I had a question regarding prayer. Are women required to have their feet covered during prayer?

Alaikumassalam wa rahmatullah,

Of the four schools of Islamic law, three have the view that a woman’s feet should be covered during the prayer. The exception is the Hanafi school, where it is believed that the feet do not have to be covered during the prayer because they do not consider it part of her ʿawra.

References:

IslamOnline fatwa (Arabic PDF)Fatwa from the Egyptian Fatwa Authority (Arabic PDF)

How to determine the end of menstruation in Islam

aselamaleikum can a woman start praying after her menses when blood stops flowing, but there comes discharge to clean the blood out? Does she have to wait until everything is all clear?

Alaikumassalam wa rahmatullah,

After bleeding stops, if she wipes her inner labial lips with a tissue and sees only white or clear discharge, then that means the menstruation has ended. But if there is any color (reddish or yellowish), then that means she is still menstruating.

References

Fatwa from the Qatari Fatwa Authority (Arabic PDF)