Ellie Lieberman's Blog: Dusty Shelves - Posts Tagged "writing"

First published on Acorn Tops blog:

If you are anything like me, you have done many pretend author interviews in the bathroom mirror since you were about eight. Yes, indeed, I am a pro of this type of Q&A. We’ll see if that carries over to my interview with Dot Cannon from Noelophile blog at the Mystic Dragon Book Festival on August 15th.

Throughout all of those pretend interviews, as well as the millions (no, I’m pretty sure this is not an exaggeration) of author interviews I have watched online thanks to youtube, and that one time I saw Diana Gabaldon live, one of the most commonly asked question is when did you become a writer? When did you start writing?

When is a very different question then the why (which most, I have found, answer much like Descartes- “I write, therefore I am”). Writing is a state of being, how we got to that state, though, is as diverse as the people who write.

For me, personally, it is something I have always been doing. I don’t mean this as a simple answer or a cop-out. It is the truth and I owe it to the most powerful inspiration in my life, my mother. Barbara Lieberman

I grew up to the sound of her fingers dancing across the keyboards, making new worlds to explore and new characters to meet and fall in love with. And those were some of my purely happy childhood memories. I still remember the first story she wrote. It was about a small acorn I found walking back from dropping my brother off at the bus stop.

We had a deal. She would let me stay up past my bedtime to get to listen to what more she wrote that day as long as I brushed her hair. And I learned a lot in those nights. I learned tricks for editing (reading aloud). I learned research and the lengths one could go and the different resources available. I learned spelling and grammar (and that even the best sometimes flub in that area). Most importantly, though, I learned the power of storytelling, the power of writing, the power of words. It ignited a spark.

I remember my countless sketchbooks filled with what most would call scribbles on the front, and on the back would be a corresponding very short story. My mom tells me on the way to ballet, I would tell stories from the moment the key in the ignition turned to the moment the car would park. I grew up writing and telling stories, and I owe much of that to my mother.

I was fortunate to not only grow up with a mom who was passionate about reading and who shared that passion with me, but to grow up at my mother’s keyboard as well as her bookshelves. And what is even more exciting, as I follow in her footsteps and publish my own stories, is getting to experience the stories and characters I grew up with being shared with the whole world, too. Mouse and Shadow; and Emma and John; and Ellie and Alex were my earliest and oldest friends and playmates. And to see them become a book I can hold and open and revisit any time, is indescribable.

So when did I become a writer? When did it all start? It started with the first word my mother typed.

Check out my mom’s blog/website: http://www.keyboardmusings.com/
Her Amazon page: http://www.amazon.com/Barbara-Lieberm...
Her Good Reads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show...

I tend to meet my characters the way you would meet a stranger on the streets. There are things you can tell just by looking. And these features in their own right tell you a bit about a person. There is evidence of where they came from and who they are in the way they speak, the way they look, the way they hold themselves. Peeking through the cracks of the masks we show the world, you can start to see the true person who lies beneath.

Then, you get to know them and you become their friend and confidante. They let you into their own little world and little by little the mask starts to ease off, until they are as comfortable with you as they would be with someone they’ve known their whole life. Here is where you learn of their past, confirm or rethink what you assumed when they first showed up, and discover interests, idiosyncrasies, habits, and sometimes, but not always, their secrets.

Writing characters for me is not the act of playing god, but more the role of a scribe. I listen, I watch them in my mind, and I take dictation. Hopefully it is a well enough job to do them justice, because otherwise they won’t let me get some sleep.

There are certainly elements that are borrowed or inspired by other things, whether it’s real people or other fictional characters in other stories and forms of storytelling. However, the characters are no more planned than the plot. They are not built upon like legos, though connections can be made. They appear as they are and then they leave with each new reader.

When I’m not writing or working on my business, I wear a neon orange vest and am the official shoe tie-er, whistle-blower, referee, nurse-referal writer, and hand raised- answerer of an elementary school playground and lunchroom. For three hours I stand in the blazing sun and try not to think about the questionable substance I just stepped in on the cafeteria’s floor. In the midst of the laughter, shouting, whistles, and bells was a little girl in tears.

Something was going on at home, she missed her mom, she was lonely, and the only thing that helped was holding my hand as she walked with me around the playground and she sat with me at lunch. By the second day, first recess went a lot better. She didn’t have to hold my hand as much, she was jumping up and down, and was talkative with no tears. Come lunch, it was right back to square one. When I asked what happened, she answered with a sniffle, a shrug, and told me, “I’m trying to be brave, but it’s hard.”

And who hasn’t been there? Whether it is something inside you, a relationship with someone, or trying to publish that new book. We need someone’s hand to hold, someone to sit with us, because it is hard. It’s hard to be brave enough to face the challenges, let alone attempt to conquer them.

But, a wise person once said, “Being brave is not the absence of fear, but being afraid and doing it anyway.” What is braver than that little first grader still sitting there at that table with me? Still coming to school the next day? Still trying? What is braver than the person with anxiety making a new stride in their development to overcome? What is braver than the person who has had their heart broken before, but dares to try to love and trust again? What is braver than the writer who wrote that book, and then shares it with the world?

To bare your heart and soul, to walk naked in front of the crowd, to put pen to paper, makes you no less brave. To feel uncertain and nervous and somewhere between the excited butterflies and raccoon claws in your stomach, but still pushing forward, still hitting publish or submit is the definition of brave! It is hard and it will hurt. It’s a part of growing. And, as Amy Bishop says in Society's Foundlings, “It’s not supposed to be easy. Anything that’s anything is always hard.”

Writing a book is like taking a hike in a forest. You might have a map, a clearly marked trail, and even signs to point you in the right direction. However, I’ve never been good at reading maps. My curiosity tends to lead me off the trail. And if, by some miracle, I can find or don’t miss the signs, I don’t always want to follow what it says.

If you ask my boyfriend or my mother, they’d probably smirk and remark about how I always have to be the rebel. And there’s a truth to that. From the time I was in kindergarten, I colored outside the lines. Not because I couldn’t stay within them, but because I didn’t like to and I didn’t think I should have to. To this day my socks cannot match.

I do not like to be confined by the rules and the maps and the signs. Even if I am the one creating them. And neither do my characters. They want the same freedom, and quite honestly, are part of what leads me off the path.

Nobody should hike alone, and when you’re writing, you are joined by many companions. For me, they tend to be the leaders in this journey, because muses help me if I deny them that. Marshmallows go missing, as do the chocolate, and graham crackers are too bland to eat alone. Equipment disappears, rocks start flying, and they will not let me rest until I follow along.

Flying by the seat of my pants, or where the characters drag me, is not only simply part of my personality as a whole, but self preservation.

That being said, I’ve started on a new adventure. There are certain requirements to follow, such as word count and deadlines, and I am starting to dabble in some forms of planning. While the characters are taking the lead, they seem as lost as I am. I can’t seem to make sense of the map yet (am I holding it upside down), and it doesn’t help I’m dragging a two ton dragon along.

In short, you should probably never choose me as your hiking buddy.

I’ve been thinking about tag lines of late. Businesses tend to have tag lines, a sentence long catchy slogan, as do some authors. So far my favorite is Barbara Lieberman’s “Reimaging Happily Ever After.” And, it really does fit her work.
What fits my work? What would my tagline be?

Recently, a reader called my writing fearless. I mean, what a way to stroke my ego. Nothing gets my pen scratching and my fingers typing faster than praise like that. She called it fearless for “going there.” When people first pick up Society's Foundlings there is this assumption that because it’s about young men written by a young woman it would be a sweet story.

Truth is, sweet is not exactly my cup of tea when it comes to writing. It can be a little dark, a little sad, and in some parts bitter-sweet. However, as Dot Cannon, a local blogger from Noelophile (http://noelophile.com/) and Over Coffee (http://twomaverix.com/) pointed out, despite the dark nature and tough themes I discuss in my writing, the ultimate message is that of hope.

A Light in the Darkness…

Whether it’s Carver’s cigarette matches from Society's Foundlings or dragon’s fire from the upcoming Dragon Anthology.

There’s my tagline.

Earnest Hemingway said “There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed.”
When I write, I truly write. There’s not only an investment in the characters and storylines. It is pouring heart and soul. It is knocking down the barriers of the everyday, exposing and vulnerable and naked on a blank page.

It is said that if there is no tears in the writer there will be no tears in the reader. From what I know of books like Chip Davis’s Angel’s Song in The Playlist Anthology and Barbara Lieberman’s To Miss The Stars (which comes packaged with tissues, by the way), there is truth in that saying.

Each week I revisit my manuscripts to participate in the local twitter event, 1lineWed, where writers share lines from their work based on a weekly theme. This week’s theme is Chaos and in Society's Foundlings, which was published two years ago, I came across this one line, “There’s a comfort in what you’re accustomed to. Chaos becomes its own sort of peace.” It amazed me how a simple line could still stir those same feelings in me as when I first picked up the pencil to write them.

2015 was a chaotic year, if not for external reasons, then for internal. In the years following the outward became its own sort of chaos. Now, I am in a much better place in both ways.

We have terms we use in my family for PTSD moments. Those little triggers that send you back to moments your body can’t seem to forget no matter how much your mind wants to. Those responses so ingrained in the brain, your breath catches, your heart seizes, the pain from that moment mere months or years ago is just as fresh and present now as it was then. But, revisiting this honest and sometimes brutal text that I created is different.

It’s as bittersweet as the story itself. I’m better. My world is better. The characters will forever remain frozen in that moment, in those conflicts, though. I have moved on and in a way, while there is hope on that final page, it is a final page. It is a scar, that indelible reminder, but it’s the scars that let the light shine through.

Most people who know me know I'm part of an indie-only bookstote in LA called Pipe & Thimble Bookstore (www.pipeandthimble.com). As the co-propriator, the PA, and the salesperson who sits behind the counter, I know one of the biggest struggles, especially in getting out there and drawing in the community, is that most, if not all,the names are unknown. While it is a selling point for most (No one else will bring that book as a gift to the babyshower), others don't always grasp how special and essential these relatively unknown voices can be. As an indie author myself, I've also experienced this in regards to my own books at events or trying to promote books online.

Here's the thing. If you were to walk into some big name retailer, like say Barnes & Nobles, and you were to browse their shelves, how many names would you recognize? Sure, you might know some of the classics. Bronte, Austin, Dickens, Twain... You might recognize most recent big names. Green, Roberts, Sparks, King... But how many times do you glance at a Best Seller List and know every single author on there? One of the biggest challenges of this industry for many is how inundated it is, how many books are out there, and not only through self publishing and the rise of the small presses, but traditionally published books, too.

Marketing wise, it can feel like you're shouting into the void. Indies don't have the corner stone on being unknown. The difference is, we have to work a bit harder to be seen. Reader wise, though, what's the difference?

Okay, yes, theoretically the endorsement of a big press or a well known name gives the reader certain assurances. Indies are on their own for things like formatting, cover design, editing, and content. However, recent years have proven the stigma and stereotype in regards to quality or lack thereof false. There's a reason Pipe & Thimble Bookstore not only sees repeat customers, but customers coming back for more copies of the same book to give out to friends or even more titles by the same author. And, while there can be drawback from someone who does not rely on big name companies, there's also many, many benefits. The only censorship for an indie is self-censorship. They can cover topics and issues that seek to make a difference in readers lives, regardless of if it's "in" or "sellable." The passion and quality can remain the same through out a series without the restrictions of pre-set deadlines. The list can go on.

There's another part of this as well. I've been to a Barnes & Noble where the salesperson didn't know Jane Austen wrote Pride & Prejudice, didn't realize she has been dead for a while, or that the book is not part of a series. People know Ray Bradbury wrote Farenheit 451 or that Kurt Vonnegut wrote Slaughterhouse-Five, but can they name other titles they wrote? Can they list off all their titles? Did you know George Orwell didn't just write 1984 or Animal Farm, but also wrote Keep the Apridistra Flying? Or that the author who wrote The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde is the same author who wrote Treasure Island and he wrote another book called Kidnapped. If an author themselves is not unknown, chances are there's a book of theirs that is, if not to you, than to someone.

And, let's be honest, no author was a success overnight. No author started off with even 10 reviews. At some point, they all were just some unknown name writing some unknown book and shouting into the void of an inundated industry. J.K. Rowling got where she was because someone took a chance on her. Any of the greats, any of the well-known who have been adopted as a pop-culture reference got somewhere because someone happened to hear them out.

It's no different walking into Pipe & Thimble Bookstore or when you walk by an author's signing table. You could be that first spark to ignite recognition, or at least for that author to know someone took the time to hear them, that they aren't shouting into the void. With you, they can be more than just an unknown, they can someone to somebody. Chances are something they say will resonate. Take a chance on them, and take a chance on me.

And, authors, yes it feels like shouting into the void. Yes, we are inundated with books. But, don't stop. There's an endless amount of stories to be told and there's an endless amount of people to tell them, including you. And, just as endless as those stories may be and despite whatever the media is feeding you, there are endless readers to enjoy those stories. You will hear people say reading is a dying art. The truth is, it never went away. We will not, and will never, run out of readers. And, books, much like basset hounds, chocolate, fried rice, and potato chips, are an addiction. Readers don't just have one book. So, never stop shouting into the void. You never know who might hear.

Perhaps you've heard an author joke about their character's having a mind of their own. Anyone who is a writer knows there is a truth to this. They do what they want to do. We're merely there to write it.

Barbara Lieberman has mentioned many times how she tried to soften Bridget from To Reap a Whirlwind. Every time she would come close, this character would just dash any chance at redemption.

For me and my writing, it's even when the creations themselves are faced with the situations they are thrown into. That is to say, my books tend to have characters exercising free will more than being pushed into a fate.

They make decisions and these choices lead to consequences. The characters in Society's Foundlings feel abandoned by each other and society, not because it is fate, but because of their own choices, as well as the choices of those around them. Garrett makes a choice at the end of Solving for X, same as Jenna, and these decisions are made based on their experiences. In one of my WIPs, a character decides his own fate, as well, in a pivotal moment: "This, here, was the moment of truth. Before him laid two options, and while one stung, more from the man who suggested it than the suggestion itself, the other was one with which he could not live."

Though there may be literary techniques utilized, such as foreshadowing, whether purposeful or merely unintentional (and don't you just love when that happens?), the decision still remains solely in the hands of the characters. Think of it also as looking back on your own personal story. Was there not foreshadowing in your own life that you missed at the time, whether it be "hindsight is 20/20" or just weird coincidences?

My characters have always been a driving force in writing the story, but they have always been the "masters of their fate" within their stories, as well.