Andrew Seiple's Blog: Transmissions From the Teslaverse - Posts Tagged "creation"

Confession time:

I've been dealing with depression for most of my life. It comes and goes, and when it's upon me I see everything through a filter of bleakness. Small things seem much more important than they really are, and every setback is a tragedy of epic proportions, a negative reinforcement that yeah, the world is really as crappy as you think.

When it gets bad enough I just stop functioning entirely and withdraw, avoiding people. Eventually I get over it, but it takes time to recharge, and put my mind in order.

But there's a way to speed up the process.

If I use the time to create something, I lose myself in the details, forget about the way everything seems horrible right now, and just BUILD. And piece by piece, bit by bit, the depression seeps away, as my ever-busy, ever-critical mind is more concerned about the next bit, or where to put this really cool piece, or similar measures. And in the back of my mind I give the fearful part of my subconscious time to examine things and realize that hey, I'm not as boned as I thought.

And life goes on.

So yeah, caught in an online argument yesterday, the little things started piling up, and depression snuck up on me hard. I turned into THAT GUY, you know the one, and argued crappily. But when you do that, and you finally realize you're doing that, you make your apologies, kick pride in the arse, and shut the hell up until your head's in a better spot.

I've burned no bridges, thankfully.

And, depressed as hell yesterday, I spent a gainful two hours and got twenty-five-hundred words further into Dire:Time. My bad moods are your gain, people!

(I do well in good moods too, so please don't wish me ill in an effort to speed the next book. :D )

Anyhoo, Dire:Time's first draft is about 70% complete. I've already farmed out a few earlier bits for editing, in an effort to speed matters. I was shooting for late July for a release, but I'm a little behind schedule... No way to avoid that with Origins falling where it did. So it'll probably be August. I'll try to get'er out there before Gencon, but no promises.

Until then, I wish you all well! Keep on keeping on, and if you deal with depression, as I do... perhaps creating something will help.

And hell, if it doesn't, then what have you got to lose? If it doesn't cheer you up sure you'll be depressed but you'll still have a brand new thing to play with!