Karima Vargas Bushnell's Blog
May 28, 2024
What Red Button?
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February 12, 2024
This Is Only A Test
THIS IS
ONLY A TEST
Had it been an actual alert,
you would have been instructed
to vacate your planet for a minimum of 48 hours
while intergalactic aliens came to straighten out your mess.
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February 7, 2024
Baptized By A Walrus
If you’ve read The Book of Squidly Light or The Life and Times of Halycon Sage, you might know that I love animals. And earlier in life, spaced decades apart, I had sudden hilarious blessings from two enormous creatures of land and sea.
Sea World in California, circa 1997, a hot, gorgeous summer day. Our family — myself, John Hakim and the kids, then about seven and nine — attended a live melodrama acted out by marine animals. Seated on outdoor bleachers facing a large pool backed by a stage, the audience enjoyed a cheesy, tongue-in-cheek performance. I mean, you know how melodrama is anyway, now picture it with marine mammals. Most of the actors were seals, lively and hamming it up as seals do. The narrator was human. The story was an old-mansion mystery. Large and centrally placed on the backdrop was a gorgeously framed portrait of “Uncle Shmedly,” a walrus. As the play unfolded, seals sat here and there in the opulent living room, crossed the stage with signs, wore top hats or maybe a diamond necklace. I have a vague memory of one pulling a wagon. There might have been a big, waddling sea bird as well. The whole thing was quite funny
At the climax of the drama, the narrator proclaimed, “Uncle Shmedly!” and a magnificent walrus entered, stage right. This creature was ENORMOUS. After watching the seals, our eyes had to readjust, like an astronomer turning his astonished gaze from Mercury to Jupiter. We were seated down front, in the second row. I was dead center. Uncle Shmedly — whom we later learned was a female walrus — sank beneath the water, slow and deliberate like a mountain sinking into the earth. She rose again with equal majesty, slapping two flippers emphatically on either side of her great body. Then she raised her magnificent head, opened her mouth, and blew about a bathtub full of water all over me. It went on for a while, everyone laughing hysterically because it was so unexpected. Little kids in front shrieked and jumped, trying to get into the spray, and people on either side of me caught a bit of it. But I, soaked to the skin, clothes and hair dripping, was that day’s lucky winner.
Sparks, Nevada (right next to Reno), circa 1963, the Golden Nugget Casino. They used to have two performing elephants there, Bertha and Tina, and you could see them at the dinner show. (Bertha was full grown, Tina was a baby.) Mom and Dad and I were there, and this being the Old Days, I wore a fancy kid-dress with a carnation corsage. Dad knew the owner — he usually did — and after dinner, as a special treat, we got to go up and meet the elephants. Enraptured, I held out my hand to meet a snuffly elephant nose. The huge rubbery trunk waved around my face and shoulders, so impossibly close and strange, and so alive. I was a touch afraid, but much more delighted and intrigued. And then she ate my corsage, right off the front of my dress. I stood still to help her. While the walrus was scripted, the elephant was spontaneous. And apologies, pachy-ladies, I don’t remember now which one of you it was, because after a certain point, Tina grew up and she was big too
There, that’s it. Don’t get me started on parrots.
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Non-Arabs Trying to Pronounce the Letter Kha
There’s a lot of truth to the statement, though I think the letter ghain is much harder. Apparently the bird is a baby penguin.
Photo Credit: Facebook, origin uncertain
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The Nefertiti Nightgown
One early morning, I arose and dressed quickly, throwing my nightgown thoughtlessly on the bed. When I looked back, I saw this: an unmistakable image of the legendary Egyptian queen.
Photo Credit: Karima Vargas Bushnell
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Can You See The Dancer?
Fall day walk on sidewalk / Sweet warm air, some leaves outlined in dampness / Remains of rain / Looking down, I saw this Dancer.
Photo Credit: Karima Vargas Bushnell
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Orange Brothers Basket Weave
These near-twins often matched or mirrored each other’s poses. Venchy is on our right, Fatty on our left.
Photo Credit: Karima Vargas Bushnell
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Best Blep
Did you know that a blep is when a perfectly healthy cat sticks out her tongue for a prolonged period for no apparent reason? Well, now you do. Our daughter’s comment: “What a dork!”
Photo Credit: Karima Vargas Bushnell
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When Bob Weighed 19 Pounds
He looked good this way but was not comfy. Bob had many sterling qualities and was voted Cat Most Likely to be Mistaken for Laundry.
Photo Credit: Karima Vargas Bushnell
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Ginger Wakes Up
Peaceful sleeper, all curled up. Luckily again, my camera was ready.
Photo Credit: Karima Vargas Bushnell
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