Donnalynn Civello's Blog, page 8
March 15, 2019
Fear vs Uncertainty
[image error]… generates very different outcomes.
Fear and uncertainty are very different emotions and therefore create very different realities. Fear and uncertainty both represent a future that is unknown, but they will create very different futures based on their vibrational feedback.
Fear recognizes that the future is unknown yet anticipates the worst possible scenario and then stands back and activates it.
Uncertainty also recognizes that the future is unknown yet holds the possibility that it might still yield a positive outcome.
Uncertainty offers options for growth while fear assumes the worst.
It’s ok to be cautious of the unknown, but it is never ok to fear it. Fear gives you no options — it’s a death sentence. Recognize that the future is unknown but DON’T LABEL IT as fear; REDEFINE IT as uncertainty.
Fear guarantees that that which you fear will ultimately reappear in your life. Uncertainty helps talk you off the ledge and encourages you to see the potential for positive outcomes.
Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.
Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.
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If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynn, click here.
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March 4, 2019
Suffering is Attachment to Thoughts
[image error]… not the actual outcome.
When things don’t work out the way we hope they will, we suffer. We suffer because the outcome is less than desirable. When we take a closer look at our suffering, we can see that the pain is caused by our attachment to a given outcome. But the attachment is only a thought form — it’s a thought projection of an expected and probable outcome.
When that expected and probable outcome does not occur, we are at a loss and suffering ensues. In reality, we may not be able to control the outcome, but we can absolutely control our thoughts about the outcome and the ability to shift those thoughts is what can help reduce suffering.
If the outcome you receive is not the outcome you were hoping for, the key is surrender. When you can surrender and accept the outcome (whether it is pleasing or not,) you can begin to change your thought about the outcome and shift your thought to a thought that is slightly more empowering.
The difference between happiness and suffering is the quality of the thought form. When your attachment is to thoughts that uplift you, you attract uplifting outcomes and when your attachment is to demotivating thoughts, you attract demotivating outcomes.
Your thoughts determine your reality. If you want to alleviate suffering, learn to change your thoughts about what you are experiencing. This is not to say “lie to yourself,” it is just to help you reframe the situations in your life so that you can begin to alter your thoughts so you can experience more positive outcomes. When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.
Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.
Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.
Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.
If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynn, click here.
If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.
February 28, 2019
Change Comes Calling
[image error]… when you’re ready for it.
Not before.
If something is shifting in your life, it’s time for it to shift. Whether you realize it or not, things only begin to shift when you’re ready for a new phase of life.
The secret to navigating change is to follow the tide, not resist it. You don’t have to have all the answers, you only need to follow the tide when it shifts and trust the process of your life that it knows where it’s leading you. The universe always has your back. Change wouldn’t be happening if it wasn’t time for change to happen.
Don’t get tripped up over any perceived outcome. It’s great to have a goal, but don’t hold steadfast to it, be flexible. You never know where life will take you. If you think you know what’s right for you and you hold too tight to it, you will create unnecessary pain and frustration. Set a goal and then be open to where life leads you. When you are flexible, you allow yourself the chance to pivot towards something even better.
Step lightly on the earth, be fluid, be able to adapt, your life may not show up exactly as you expect, but from what I’ve learned — it usually shows up even better.
Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.
Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.
Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.
If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynn, click here.
If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.
February 21, 2019
Intuition is Listening to Yourself
[image error]… ignoring it is betraying yourself.
We all have a small, still voice within that knows what’s right for us. It is our soul speaking to us saying “come over here… come over here.” But how many of us listen to it? How many of us give credence to our intuition? Not many.
We get caught up in the day-to-day grind of routine and ego. We tend to favor our head over our heart and often times make decisions based on a parody of “what makes sense” — “do the math” — “list the pros and cons.” Decisions made from this place often times go against the soul’s calling.
Believe it or not, it never matters what makes sense. All that matters is that we learn to listen to our hearts — that is the wisdom of the soul and it will never lead us astray.
Our soul knows why we are here. Our soul is always guiding us along our path of fate and steering us towards outcomes in support of our highest purpose. We just need to be aligned with it in order to achieve oneness with ourselves.
Oneness is found by listening to yourself. You have every answer you ever needed, you only have to ask yourself and then be grounded enough to listen to the response.
Your soul will never deceive you. If you don’t like what you hear, you may not like the path you are on. Intuition is a great arbiter of justice — it’s the process of listening to yourself. Ignoring it is akin to betraying yourself. If you cannot hear your intuition, ask yourself who are you hiding from? YOU are the only one you are running from.
Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.
Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.
Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.
If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynn, click here.
If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.
February 4, 2019
You’re Not Being Punished
[image error]… you’re only being pushed to evolve.
Pain is your greatest catalyst for change. Transformation only happens when there is something deeply traumatic that needs to be transformed.
No one is punishing you for your actions. No one is here to be victimized and tortured. If you’re going through hell, it’s a self-imposed construct you set up for yourself to empower yourself, so see it through.
There are no bad circumstances, there are only bad perceptions of those circumstances. No matter how difficult, how grave, how painful or hopeless your situation, you wouldn’t be going through it unless you were ready to transform it into something much better suited for you.
Don’t just sit and whine about it. Buck up, pick yourself up off the ground and put the pieces back together the best way you know how in this moment (with positive determination) and the universe will conspire with you to help you transmute the situation.
The universe is your mirror. Realize that if you sit around and find reasons to complain about your situation, the universe will join you and give you every reason to continue to complain. The choice of how you show up in the face of adversity is always yours, and it will certainly determine your next experience.
Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.
Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.
Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.
If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynn, click here.
If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.
January 23, 2019
You Can’t Change People
[image error]… who can’t see an issue in their behavior.
Not everyone is conscious. Not everyone has the ability to see how their actions affect others. If you have to tell someone over and over again that they’re hurting you, they are unable to process your pain, most likely because they haven’t processed their own.
In order for them to honor your feelings, they first have to look at themselves in the mirror and accept responsibility for how they’ve made you feel. But for many, that reflection can be very painful and bring up other past failures. No one wants to feel responsible for hurting someone else and no one wants to feel like a failure; it’s much easier to just shut down and become defensive — “let me prove to you that I don’t need to change, you do.”
If someone is truly evolved, they know they are not responsible for how you feel, BUT they will always have a degree of empathy for your feelings and will always be able to honor them in whatever way they can.
If they can’t hear your pain, you’ll never be able to get them to honor it. If you’re trying to communicate your feelings and they’re being defensive, walk away, sometimes silence can be the greatest teacher. If your words aren’t enough to help them hear you, then stop talking and give them the time and space to hear what you have already said.
You can’t change people who can’t see an issue in their behavior. You can’t get anyone to stop hurting you until they come face to face with their own pain. If they cannot change themselves, how are you ever going to change them? Life is too short to try and teach unconscious people how to honor your feelings. Walk away and in time the universe will deliver you someone who can honor your heart.
Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.
Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.
Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.
If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynn, click here.
If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.
January 8, 2019
Betrayal Never Hurts The Betrayed
[image error]… it only hurts the betrayer.
Ironic, but true.
To be betrayed is the greatest gift because it shows you someone’s true colors. But as humans, we get caught up in the drama of the betrayal. But in reality, it never matters WHY you were betrayed, or HOW you were betrayed, what matters is that you identify the betrayer. That person is NOT true to you nor do they hold your best interests. In the long run, that is much more valuable information.
Betrayal is a morality game. And by virtue of the fact that one betrays another, the karmic debt rests on their shoulders.
The betrayed can walk away with a clean conscience assuming they’re innocent. The betrayer must live with their actions and the consequences of which always carry a karmic price tag, not to mention the regret of deceit weighs heavily on the soul.
If you’ve been betrayed, don’t spend your energy trying to justify yourself or your situation and don’t feel victimized. Know you deserve better and pick your head up high and keep walking. The betrayer may have gotten what they wanted in the short run, but in the long run, the betrayed always wins because they now know who they will NEVER TRUST AGAIN and that alone is worth its weight in gold.
Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.
Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.
Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.
If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynn, click here.
If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.
January 3, 2019
An Ending is NEVER an Ending
[image error]… it’s ALWAYS the beginning of something new.
It has to be.
One door can’t close without another one opening. Everything is energy and that energy doesn’t just go away; it needs to be redirected. Energy doesn’t just stop; it transitions into something else.
Endings must always lead somewhere new because life is cyclical and change is constant. Nothing ever stays the same. The seeds of what’s ending always fertilize a new beginning. So the question is never “what have I lost” it is “what will I create next?”
An ending is never an ending, it’s always the beginning of something new. Your work is not to lament the ending, but to focus on creating a new and better beginning.
Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.
Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.
Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.
If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynn, click here.
If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.
December 17, 2018
Forgive Others NOT Because They Deserve It
[image error]… but because you do.
We have the wrong idea about forgiveness… we think it’s something we give to others, but really, it’s a gift we give to ourselves.
When you leave a situation or relationship angry or resentful, you are NOT free. It takes so much energy to harbor anger and resentment and it keeps you trapped there. But when you leave a situation or relationship with love and gratitude, you are free to move forward into your future.
Animosity keeps you trapped. Forgiveness sets you free. Forgiveness isn’t something you give to another; it’s something you give to yourself. Being free of attachment to another is the greatest gift we can give to ourselves.
When relationships end, let them go. Don’t hold onto the pain and hurt. Forgive. Not because they deserve your forgiveness, but because you do. You deserve to be happy and pain free. Forgiveness is one step closer to getting there.
Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.
Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.
Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.
If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynn, click here.
If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.
December 11, 2018
When You Know Better
[image error]… you have a responsibility to BE BETTER.
It’s just the way it works.
When dealing with those who don’t know better, it’s your job to lead by example and show them a better way.
It doesn’t matter who is right or wrong. Being on a path of personal growth means accepting responsibility for your actions and never holding others accountable for your own shortcomings, especially those who don’t know better.
Don’t waste your time fighting with others who don’t know better. Don’t hold them to the same standard you hold yourself, not everyone is capable of it.
Fighting with someone who doesn’t have the tools to be better doesn’t bring them there. It just brings you down. If they can’t get there on their own, guide them by your example. When you know better, your behavior can be the catalyst for great change.
Bite the bullet, be the bigger person. Two wrongs never make a right so don’t stoop to their level. If they don’t know better, it’s your job to be better. Learn to lead by example or get out of their way.
Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.
Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.
Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.
If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynn, click here.
If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.
