Lisa Endlich's Blog, page 391

The Letter This Mom Has Been Writing All Summer

Dear Son,

You know I’ve been writing this letter in my head all summer.

I’ve done dozens of drafts and every one has had the same format. State your case, make three examples and restate your case all over again. Sound familiar?

So here’s my case: I am incredibly proud to have you for my son. Your dad and I won the lottery when it comes to first borns—smart, driven, good-looking, and kind. Most importantly kind.

As you go off on this great adventure of college, know that I have every faith i...

The Most Difficult Day of Parenting

Words are amazing little tools. Most of the time, they enable us to communicate our innermost thoughts and feelings with almost pinpoint accuracy. Unfortunately, there are also times, like now, when the right words elude us. When we can’t find a way to articulate how we feel, no matter how many thesauruses we use. For me, this is one of those times.

So in the interest of trying to be as authentic as I can here and give you a true peephole into my heart, the rest of my column are the most emo...

College Drop Off: How to Handle this Gut-Wrenching Milestone

God, this is all so weird. Like really, really weird.
In my head, I know we’re dropping my daughter off at school next month. I mean, it’s on my calendar with a sad face and everything. So it’s not that I’m in denial or anything, it’s all just very surreal.

I’ve watched all the Target bags accumulate into a little Devils Tower-like mound in the corner of the basement. I’ve seen her friends already start to leave, the goodbyes getting more and more frequent. I’ve even caught myself hugging he...

Community College was the Best Choice for Me and Here’s Why

We’ve all seen them: the posts scattered across social media about someone’s child getting into this University or being awarded that amazing scholarship. The posts about packing up childhood rooms and moving across the country with all of the essentials it takes to survive freshman year. While all of these are amazing and wonderful accomplishments, it doesn’t mean it is the only path or even the right path for every teen.

Eleven years ago, I stood where they do now. I took the SAT, I applie...

Why This Mom Lost it in the Toy Aisle

The fact that my oldest daughter is going to college next month comes as no great surprise to me—I’ve been anticipating and preparing for it for a really, really long time. Pretty much since the day she was born.

Together with my husband, of course, I helped her research schools, went on all the campus tours, bought all the overpriced hoodies from all the schools we might be interested in, filled out all the applications, proofread her essay, waited by the mailbox, ran screaming around the h...

College Shopping Hacks: 21 Ways To Save Time And Money

This post is in partnership with Bed Bath & Beyond.

Look at your kid, your actual real kid. What is important to her? Does feeling “at home” impact her happiness? Is he a terrible sleeper who needs a comfortable bed? Is she indifferent to lots of clothing so the dresser provided is adequate? Is he bringing expensive musical equipment that will need to be protected? Shopping for college can feel like a generic experience with long lists of “must haves” but you are only sending off one kid, a k...

I Wanted a Separation But Dreaded Telling My Kids

My husband and I decided to separate in October and it took us until February to tell our children. It was a long, hard, tense road. One I don’t think I could live through again.

The fear of telling our kids kept us living together a little too long if I am being honest. And when we finally sat down to tell them, it was enough to make me say, “Oh, never mind, we are not separating. It will be okay.”

I came so close.

Having a teenager and two tweens, I knew they would take it harder than they...

Teens and Suicide: Urgent Conversation We Need to Have Now

Teenagers are impulsive. We know that. There is ample evidence and brain science that confirms it. And while educators and psychologists and physicians are encouraging parents to learn about behavior management and help their teens learn how to take healthy risks, one conversation we don’t often have with our teens concerns impulsivity and suicide. It may well be the most important conversation we aren’t having with our teens.

Suicide is complicated and multifaceted. It is incredibly difficu...

College Professor Warns: How Not to Be a Lawn Mower Parent

It happened again this week. Several times, in fact.

I’m a university professor and my office is located directly across from the elevators. Because I maintain a literal “open-door” policy for my students, visitors often mistake me for the department secretary, since I am the first person they see when the elevator doors open. At this time of year, the same scenario happens repeatedly:

I’m concentrating on something, but out of the corner of my eye I see the elevator doors slide open. It’s a...

College Professor Warns: How Not to Be a Lawnmower Parent

It happened again this week. Several times, in fact.

I’m a university professor and my office is located directly across from the elevators. Because I maintain a literal “open-door” policy for my students, visitors often mistake me for the department secretary, since I am the first person they see when the elevator doors open. At this time of year, the same scenario happens repeatedly:

I’m concentrating on something, but out of the corner of my eye I see the elevator doors slide open. It’s a...