Angie Fox's Blog, page 2

Ghosts Strike; Demand More Royalties from Reality Show Boom

CASPER, WYOMING—      If it’s quieter in your house today, blame cable TV.

Angered by the latest crop of new reality TV shows like “Ghost Adventurers”, “Ghost Hunters”, “Ghost Lab”, “Most Haunted Places In America”, and the “Celebrity Paranormal Project”, the ghosts of Casper decided to stage a quiet protest by giving us a taste of the silent treatment.

“No moans, no rattling, no unexplained thumps,” said James M. Flanigan, former owner and current haunter of Casper’s oldest steakhouse, the Plush Steer. “We might give you a chill on the back of your neck or a minor case of goosebumps just to remind you we’re here, but other than that—nothing.”

The undead of Casper feel that they’ve been treated unfairly by the creators and crew of these shows, one of which filmed recently at The Ivy House Inn Bed & Breakfast, a historic haunted site on South Ash. “Not only are they coming in and making money off our hard work, they won’t even share their craft table with us while they’re filming!” said Flanigan. “Just because I’m dead doesn’t mean I wouldn’t like a bagel or some mini Snickers, too!”

Sasquatch: “Don’t Call Me Bigfoot”

DEVILS ELBOW, CALIFORNIA—  Sasquatch has a big problem with being called “Bigfoot.”

The painfully shy forest-dweller is finally speaking on the record. He prefers to be addressed by his full name, Lorenzo P. Sasquatch III, or Sasquatch for short. Not Bigfoot. The nickname, it seems, was given to him by less-than-kind classmates in grade school, and — like many nicknames – stuck.

“It all started with my first growth spurt. My feet came in before the rest of me. So in fourth grade, I was 4 feet tall with size 96EEE feet. And…you know how kids are. Now that I’m 10 feet tall, everything’s in proportion. It is hard for me to find shoes, which is why I go barefoot most of the time”, he explained to a reporter. But after over 50 years, he’s had it with hearing about their enormous size all the time.

“I did tell Leonard Nimoy about it when they came to film that ‘In Search Of…’ episode.  He was very sympathetic. You know, he still has to hear about Spock ears everywhere he goes. He said I should just put up with it, that if people knew it bothered me they’d just use it even more. But really, enough is enough.”