A.C. Ahn's Blog, page 5

God’s Quotes on Possibilities

“So vast, so limitless in capacity is man’s imagination to disperse and burn away the rubble-dross of fact and probability, leaving only truth and dream.”― William FaulknerThis is the quote we chose as the epigraph for our book, Hydrangeas on Fire. It’s taken from Faulkner’s 1950 book, Requiem for a Nun, which I have yet to read. So, although I may not be familiar with its original context, I believe it captures the theme of HoF very well. The protagonist sort of experiences the quote, quite literally, climbing over each letter of each word of the line. By the time he slides off of the “n” in “imagination,” he realizes how much potential he has and starts to apply himself. Overcoming the “rubble-dross of fact and probability” yields to events leading up to the climax and consists of him figuring out what is important and what is meaningless to him. At the end, not only does the character come to the truth, but the reader does as well.The word “dream” doesn’t really apply to our book, however. It is relevant to another, more extensive, interpretation: for writers and story creators (or any other creative thinkers) to pursue their dreams. In the real world, students are discouraged from career paths that are risky, overly competitive, and “don’t contribute to society.” So, in other words, the arts. But Faulkner here is telling us to disregard probability and numbers. And, although he mentions the “capacity of man’s imagination,” it’s not an automatic process of using it to clear away the excess to make a path; only those who apply themselves will be able to create something that can be considered a real contribution to society. That’s why not every writer turns out to be Stephen King. And, I’m not saying the work of writers is better than that of doctors. The world needs its fact-studied engineers, scientists, and actuaries. What I am saying is that the world also needs its imaginative minds just as much.

Thoughts on Uncovering the Fossil

This is something I struggle with a lot when starting a new story. When I was writing Hydrangeas on Fire, I had general ideas for what should happen in each chapter, so uncovering the fossil came naturally then. But, with short stories, it takes me a while to decide where I should start digging. It is always hard to start working on anything, whether it be exercising, studying, or doing the dishes. Writing is the same way.If you haven’t heard of the phrase before, then you might be confused. Let me explain. Stephen King likens writing a story to uncovering a fossil. In his how to/memoir, On Writing, he explains how all stories sort of preexist, even before the author writes them. I don’t have the exact quote (and I don’t want to flip through the entire book to find it), but the gist is that authors do not create stories but discover the ones already buried in their minds. Their job then is to carefully excavate the story without breaking any of the bones. If the writer is lucky, he’ll stumble upon a full, complete fossil that will then translate into a wonderful story.The more I try to write, the more I believe this to be true. Once I get past the “what should I write about?” part, I find that the rest of the story writes itself. Symbols, foreshadowing, dialogues, all form naturally. A quote I do have saved is, “Good story ideas seem to come quite literally from nowhere.” I’ll start writing a story about something I want to write about, but find it not working. Then I’ll write about something completely different, something I didn’t think would make a good story, but it turns out better than expected.I don’t remember if King talks much about how to master the fossiling, or whether it can be mastered, but I believe as with any skill, it can. Imagine an inexperienced writer stumbling upon a broken fossil with missing parts. He’ll ultimately produce a shitty piece of work. If he were to stumble upon an intact fossil, he has the material to write a really great story, but lacks tools and skill to properly unearth the specimen, like a novice painter positioned in front of a beautiful model. During the process, he will most likely break several of the perfect bones, resulting in another shitty story. Now imagine an experienced, successful writer in the same situations. First off, he may not “stumble” upon the fossil at all, but be able to locate them. With a broken relic—if he sees any merit in it—he can still produce a compelling story by filling in the gaps with what he thinks used to belong, thanks to his extensive experience. With an intact fossil, it’s almost guaranteed that the writer will construct one of his best works. Of course, it will still take effort.The chance of uncovering a high-end artifact is one in ten. Why ten? Because it’s a round number. But really, it’s based on my experience. (High-end doesn’t necessarily mean the best, however, because the best is subjective.) So, although I don’t have much control over the find rate, I can prepare myself for when I do stumble upon one in the future.

The Rooster

I finished and submitted a second short story today, and it ended up turning out a lot better than I had expected. Initially, I began writing about a young woman first arriving at the shores of New York City from an impoverished nation (somewhere in Europe), but beyond that, a story just wouldn’t develop. So I scratched the idea, writing only the opening paragraph, and began thinking about what I really wanted to write about. And that was easy after I watched a clip of a guy eating alone in an American diner. I got to thinking, The first detective story I’ve ever written won a competition, why not just continue writing detective/crime stories and be as noir as I possibly can? So after writing my second detective short, I’ve now decided to analyze the finished product, and perhaps understand the thinking behind my writing process. Hopefully it’ll help me improve.-When I start writing a new story, I usually come up with a very very broad title to use mainly as a placeholder, and sometimes, forgo the title all together. I find that putting too much thought into the title without first finishing the story inhibits the potential creativity and wayward path that the story can take. And in the beginning of the process, I never map out the entire plot in my mind, only brief scenes here and there.-I start with the protagonist of the story looking out the window of a diner, introducing his name and a brief background of his status and occupation, which infers his young age. The bald man he watches is simply referred to as “the man” in order to leave readers comfortable with the protagonist, Colonel, and hopefully take his side through future events. The man’s name, Marvin, is only revealed once he begins talking and joins Detective Colonel Vogel.-The shimmering red lights that appear on Marvin’s forehead before he enters the diner is an obvious foreshadow, but it also serves to provide imagery of the darkness outside allowing the neon sign to visibly reflect. I could also say that the reflection of light symbolizes the false intentions that Marvin has in store (but perhaps we should just stick with the imagery and foreshadowing).-The soggy newspaper acts as a recognizable place-marker to open and close the story.-The first thing Marvin mentions is Colonel drinking iced tea instead of coffee—it’s peculiar, especially on a rainy late night/early morning in the middle of winter. The reason he doesn’t drink coffee is because symbolically, he’s the Rooster. He doesn’t want and doesn’t need to drink coffee, even at a 24 hour diner.-Marvin asks for an extra coffee cup from the waitress. The Detective says he doesn’t drink coffee, but Marvin insists. At this point I’m trying to write interesting characters and interesting dialogue. The connections come afterwards. And I’ve read what I’ve got multiple times at this point, and the feeling isn’t all that great. But it rarely starts off how you want it to (cause you really don’t know what you want at the start).-Marvin calls Colonel, chicken, due to an anecdote Colonel told him a while back. I decide not to go into the anecdote itself, because it’ll derail the story and break the pacing. But it’s easy to tell that the anecdote somehow reflects Colonel’s chicken-like quality, whether he’s easily startled, etc. The anecdote could also be a fabricated story he tells to make people like Marvin like and trust him.-Marvin reminds the waitress of the extra coffee cup, building up suspicion. What’s the deal with the coffee cup?-Before Colonel starts eating, I have the two characters display their little quirks, so they become more realistic, believable, and most importantly, interesting. Marvin jokes about Colonel eating chicken (sense of humor), insults Germans (arrogant), crosses his burly arms (physique/attitude), and stares perversely (nature). Colonel slices his meat before eating (ritualistic), ignores Marvin’s joshing (solemn), and grows tense (easily stressed).-After Colonel finishes eating, Marvin’s smile disappears. In the back of my mind, I had the idea that Marvin, in some very small way or another, has grown fond of the kid and feels obligated to at least let him finish his “last” meal.-Marvin gives his BS reason as to why he called Colonel out while the Detective’s easily tensed body starts to act up. The Boss is Marvin’s brother, which I found necessary in order to set up the situation at the end. If Marvin wasn’t the Boss’s brother, then Colonel would definitely have no qualms shooting him immediately.-Marvin shows frustration at the timing of the waitresses not bringing out the coffee cup. At this point, I know exactly how the story is going to pan out and end.-At the climax, like a timely superpower, Colonel’s spasm kicks in, saving his life and springing him into action. The twitching obviously reinforces his chicken like qualities. During the gunfight, I tried to make the scene as exciting as I could by minimizing comma usage and following every action immediately with another. I feel like I did a pretty good job at the imagery of bloodshed and pacing here.-If it wasn’t obvious before, Marvin’s outcry makes it 100% clear that the criminal group that Marvin is a part of has recently found out that Colonel has been acting undercover, and the emphasis on the coffee cup is made clear as well.-Marvin’s attitude is, as it was before, arrogant and even a bit pretentious—he barely shows any fear when a gun is pointed at his face.-“We’re all raised to die—eventually.” Another reference to chickens, but it’s a believable line to hear in this situation.-Detective Colonel Vogel kills Marvin before he is called a chicken one last time, shunning the term, and thereby, proclaiming himself as the Rooster. The soggy newspaper makes an appearance, tying together the story.-With the sun rising and light shining through the window, Colonel calls out like a rooster but personalizes it with his most recent action—"Cock-a-doodle-bang."After writing this story, I realized that I should finish the collection with the rest of the animals. My end goal would be to publish a short story collection / novella of these stories.

Warm Up

“Get in.” She reaches over and opens the passenger side door. But James continues walking as if pretending to not hear or see her. “I said, get in.” This time she’s sure he’s heard her.Without slowing or stopping, James glances at her from the corners of his eyes and starts to sprint along the side of the barren road.“That bastard.” She relinquishes the modest pressure she’s been applying to the brakes and chases after him, but carefully as to not accidentally run him over.#His winter coat restricts his movements, keeping his arms steady at his sides while his legs work overtime. He’s listening to his favorite pop artist, but soon the music is overtaken by his panting as his headphones slide down, hugging his neck. Tiffany honks the horn and pleads for him to stop, to be rational.He can feel himself slowing down. Cold sweat gathers at the edge of his hairline, threatening to jump down his face. His body chooses to stop, and he rests with his back bent forward, hands on knees, as he wipes the perspiration with his sleeves. He was never the athletic type.

Across the Sea

She moves along with the throng, keeping her head low, both frightened and ashamed as her tattered feet make contact with foreign soil. Her eyes take a cursory glance up ahead at the skyscrapers littering the skyline, only to cower underneath her heavy eyelids. Her traditional garb is all the protection she has against the callous chill from onlookers rushing to start their day. Her face is smooth, yet blotched with dirt from the ship’s interior. A couple of men give her a second look, temporarily engrossing fantasies of becoming the only pillar of hope for the young woman who traveled across the sea.

Dichotomy

It was the best of times,but people were hungry,it was the age of wisdom,but fools ran the country,it was the epoch of belief,but faith had us divided,it was the season of light,but justice had been blinded,it was the spring of hope,but minds filled with doubt,we had everything before us,but then came the drought,we were all going directly to Heaven,but many sins were committed,and everybody knows,only the rich are acquitted.

God’s Quotes on Writing

“I never know what I think about something until I read what I’ve written on it.”― William Faulkner“Read, read, read. Read everything — trash, classics, good and bad, and see how they do it. Just like a carpenter who works as an apprentice and studies the master. Read! You’ll absorb it.Then write. If it’s good, you’ll find out. If it’s not, throw it out of the window.”― William Faulkner“A writer needs three things, experience, observation, and imagination, any two of which, at times any one of which, can supply the lack of the others.”― William Faulkner

Pretending (@ 4th & King Street Station)

He preached, begged, coiled, screamed,teached, said: unspeakable things.The receiver melted in his tight graspas those around heard, “At last, at last!”Tears of joy flowed down his fizz beard,muffled sobs masked behind his cheers.The payphone smiled wearing child’s teeth,keys zero and one detached with relief.Suddenly he jerked, waking from a dream,pulled his cart close for his soul to lean.The cord long gone, the muted phone fell—the old man back to his daily hell.

How to Improve Concentration and Performance

As a writer, do you ever feel lazy? Tired? Distracted? Well, you’re not alone. A lot of writers explore different ways to stay ahead of their lazy-selves. There are common, well known practices to stay focused and improve performance, such as drinking coffee or eating healthy. While different people have their own methods of maintaining success and a routine that works, there are a couple of simple, yet perhaps not quite as obvious tactics for writers who can’t keep still to consider.Stop Drinking CoffeeAt first, you might be thinking, No way, but limiting your intake of coffee does have its benefits. This might seem contradictory to many studies and perhaps your own experiences, but people who are not dependent on caffeine are more likely to perform better overall. According to TalentSmart, the world’s premier provider of emotional intelligence, 90% of individuals who are considered top-tier performers have high emotional intelligence. Emotional intelligence is responsible for 58% of your work performance, and we all know that the best work can be done when an individual is thinking logically in a calm and focused manner. Caffeine may have you somewhat focused, but calm is definitely questionable.MISUSAGE OF CAFFEINECaffeine tampers with emotional intelligence, trading clear thinking for temporary alertness and energy. While drinking a cup of coffee may temporarily improve concentration and help churn out paragraphs, caffeine withdrawal can undo your hard work. After 15 minutes of alertness, your cognitive performance sinks below your normal performance levels, meaning you have to drink coffee again to return your performance back to normal. This can result in writers to intake large doses of caffeine which raises blood pressure and produces rapid shallow breathing, depriving the brain of oxygen. With a lack of oxygen, the brain has difficulty thinking intelligently and creatively. It’s especially detrimental for writers who regularly pull all-nighters by chugging down cups of coffee in order to get a piece done.CAFFEINE WITHDRAWALLike most performance enhancement substances, caffeine comes with a variety of effects from withdrawalincluding:HeadachesFatigueSleepinessDifficulty concentratingAll of these symptoms are not ideal for thinking and writing. Also, a need to get more coffee can help justify wasting time or taking frequent breaks. Getting up to make coffee or going to a café are just the distractions you don’t need when trying to improve your concentration and finishing your novel.Put Away Electronic DevicesThese days, it is difficult to part with your handheld devices when most of the world is connected online. Now more than ever, people are attached to their electronic devices, being almost inseparable.OBSERVING STUDENTS STUDYINGDr. Larry Rosen, a psychology professor at California State University, conducted a study observing students studying for a 15 minute period. He found that most students started to lose focus just after three minutes and spent only about 65% of the period actually studying. 80% of the students admitted to switching between studying and technology. Dr. Rosen called this behavior “Continuous Partial Attention.” It’s obvious that people with handheld devices or computer screens with social media nearby are more prone to shifting concentration back and forth.DIVIDED ATTENTIONAccording to Dr. David Meyer, a psychology professor at the University of Michigan, in most environments, the brain cannot perform two complex tasks at the same time. Writing already involves thinking and typing. There’s no need to further divide attention by adding another task. You’ll only take longer to complete your sentences.SOLUTIONHelp yourself perform at the most efficient levels possible by hiding your electronic devices and sticking to a certain time of day to write. If the anxiety of checking your phone or surfing the web is too great, take a break for a couple of minutes before going back into writing mode.Have a Separate Work StationA huge way of limiting distractions and setting yourself into the writing mindset is by creating distinct play and work stations. If you find yourself in a habit of playing games or browsing Youtube on your computer at a certain desk, find another space to work on writing only. There’s a reason why so many people, self-employed or not, rent out office spaces instead of working at home. Home is where you come back to relax. An office space is where you go to get work done.LIBRARIESOf course, there are cheaper locations to establish a work station. Libraries are one of the best and most obvious choices. The quiet environment paired with surrounding hard working visitors makes your local library an ideal writing station. Also, most libraries don’t allow food or drinks (like coffee), and the use of handheld devices is usually discouraged.With two different stations, your mind can easily shift gears between work and play, improving concentration and writing.ModerationGreat stories don’t entirely depend on you completely cutting off coffee. In fact, if you’re a regular coffee drinker, then abstaining from coffee initially might do more harm than good. Lower your intake a little day by day until you’re happy with the results.The same idea should transfer over to your usage of electronic devices and social media. There’s no need to be constantly connected with your phone glued to your hand. Try to start off by checking your usual sites and apps a limited amount of times per day until you can reach a point that won’t distract you from writing.The key is moderation, and good habits with a distraction free work station can boost your focus. And while these tips may help control your physical limitations, the most important factor to your concentration and performance is your mindset. As a writer, you can only go so far without motivation and self discipline.

Sand Castle (Endless Ends)

I.Everyday he’d build a castleout of sand perpendicular to the waves.A coronation would be held,a lucky crustacean at the right place,crowned ruler of the beach.Serendipity on both sides.We’d dance in its honor,and it’d feel like a lifetimebefore mothers dragged worshippersback home, baths waitingdrowned in reality.II.Every morning the castlelaid in ruins, faded with gritbaring traces of a foundation—Its ruler exiled into the sea.And he’d build another castle,identical in berth but bigger.A new snail appointed ruler,an eternal cycle of history;Until the summer ends.