Beth Fehlbaum's Blog, page 5

Want your BIG FAT DISASTER ebook "signed"?

If you buy the BIG FAT DISASTER ebook and would like it "autographed", go to Authorgraph & send me a request! http://www.authorgraph.com/authors/bethfehlbaum

Follow me on my blog tour and win big!

Here's the schedule!

March 19th: Such A Novel Idea REVIEW
March 20th: Lost In Ever After 10 RANDOM MOVES
March 21st: Spiced Latte Reads REVIEW
March 22nd: Sleepless Reads SPOTLIGHT/EXCERPT 
March 23rd: TTC Books and More REVIEW
March 24th: A Dream Within A Dream REVIEW
March 25th: The Library of Sheen  AUTHOR INTERVIEW
March 26th: Sabrina’s Paranormal Palace REVIEW
March 27th: Kat’s Book Buzz REVIEW
March 28th: Mom With A Kindle THIS OR THAT

And here's what you can win!
One Winner will Get:
- a Signed Hardcover of BIG FAT DISASTER
- a $25.00 Amazon Gift Card
- and a Surprise Pack of other titles from Merit Books

Enter to win here! http://www.booknerdtours.com/2014/big-fat-disaster-by-beth-fehlbaum-tour.html

BIG FAT DISASTER Book Trailer!

Book Trailer for BIG FAT DISASTER by Beth Fehlbaum:
ISBN: 978-1440570483

Kirkus [Starred] Review: https://www.kirkusreviews.com/book-reviews/beth-fehlbaum/big-fat-disaster-fehlbaum/

Author website: http://www.bethfehlbaumbooks.com

Book trailer by Tim Eddy, Nifty Book Trailers: http://niftybooktrailers.com/

BIG FAT DISASTER contests going on right now!

CONTEST 1:
Would you like a $25 Amazon gift card? Here's info on the Amazon contest I'm running:

Preorder EITHER the ebook OR the hardcover, email proof of purchase to me, and you'll be entered in a contest for a $25 Amazon gift card! Contest ends at 11:59 PM Mon. 3/17! I'll draw the winner first thing Tuesday, 3/18! My email address is beth@bethfehlbaum.com . 

Here's some of the places you can find BIG FAT DISASTER:
http://bethfehlbaumbooks.com/where-to-buy.html

CONTEST 2:
Would you like to win a free signed hardcover of BIG FAT DISASTER?
Here's the link to enter:
https://www.goodreads.com/giveaway/show/85012-big-fat-disaster

Merit Press is giving away 25 signed copies of BIG FAT DISASTER on Goodreads! Enter to win!

Hey, hey, Merit Press is giving away 25 signed copies of BIG FAT DISASTER by http://bit.ly/NWcEhH Enter to win!

Woohoo! BIG FAT DISASTER author copies arrived today!

Kirkus Reviews gives BIG FAT DISASTER a big fat star!

BIG FAT DISASTER [STARRED REVIEW!]
Author: Beth Fehlbaum

Review Issue Date: March 1, 2014
Online Publish Date: February 19, 2014
Publisher:Merit Press
Pages: 288
Price ( Hardcover ): $17.99
Publication Date: April 18, 2014
ISBN ( Hardcover ): 978-1-4405-7048-3
Category: Fiction

Colby’s life as the heavy daughter of a disapproving former Miss Texas beauty queen is difficult enough, but it gets worse very quickly once she discovers a photo of her politician father kissing another woman.

She and her mother and little sister move to a trailer in a tiny Texas community. She has an agonizing first day of school crammed into blue jeans so tight that she needs a coat hanger to pull the zipper up—and then she discovers that her cousin made a video of her trying to get into her jeans, which gets posted to Facebook. Colby copes with each terrible event the way she always has, with huge amounts of sweets followed by shame, and spirals ever deeper into depression. Readers experience the events through Colby’s present-tense narration, hearing her perceptive take on people: “Mom does that: She nods and smiles even when she thinks the person speaking is full of shit….” Fehlbaum draws a razor-sharp picture of Colby’s judgmental grandparents, her quirky teachers and most of all, Colby herself and her terrifying mother, who can’t empathize at all. When Colby finally gets help at the end from a therapist and others, Fehlbaum makes it clear that her road ahead will be long and hard.

Colby’s experiences, while extreme, ring true, and the fast pace, lively and profane dialogue, and timely topic make it a quick and enjoyable read. (Fiction. 12-16)

Wheeee! A month from tomorrow, BIG FAT DISASTER releases in ebook! A month after that, the hardcover!

I'm on Brain Burps about Books!

Katie Davis, host of Brain Burps about Books katiedavis.com Hey, Katie Davis of Brain Burps about Books interviewed me last week, and the podcast is here! We talked about why I founded Uncommon YA, The Patience Trilogy, and Big Fat Disaster, among lots of other stuff. Check it out!

Choosing the truth that lasts and holding onto self-worth

(Note: This is a slightly revised version of a column I wrote for the group website I'm a member of, UncommonYA.)

A comment I frequently hear about my writing is that it's fearless. I write "without looking over my shoulder"; in other words, I'm unafraid of offending people's sensibilities by telling the truth.  This fearlessness--this authenticity--is what makes BIG FAT DISASTER what it is.

One thing that my editor, Jackie Mitchard, liked about BIG FAT DISASTER is that the main character, Colby Denton, who is quite overweight as the result of Binge Eating Disorder, does not decide to go on a diet, loses weight, and experience a happily ever after ending because of weight loss.  I wouldn't desire to write that sort of story nor would I likely be able to, because that's not the way I've experienced life.

I've struggled with Binge Eating Disorder for the majority of my life. I began using food as a drug when my stepfather began sexually abusing me when I was 8 years old. The sexual abuse continued into my late-teens, and psychological/verbal abuse continued until I broke ties with my family of origin at the age of 38.  I developed a full-blown eating disorder while in my teens: a form of bulimia in which I alternatively binged and starved myself.

By the age of 38, I weighed nearly 230 pounds at 5'3" tall.

Over the course of six years in intensive therapy to heal the scars of my abusive childhood, I lost over one hundred pounds. For the first time in my life, I was wearing a size "Small". I was working out daily on a treadmill and entering 5K races. I have body dysmorphia disorder so I don't know that I was ever totally proud of what I looked like, but I'd be lying if I didn't admit that I enjoyed wearing anything I wanted without thought to trying to disguise my flaws.

Then I ran into some physical problems with my feet that precluded continuing to run--which had made a significant difference in my body size-- and I also relapsed into some old eating habits, but not nearly on par with the way I used to abuse my body with food. My feet were so painful that I stopped working out altogether. The bones literally crunched when I limped, because I could not walk without limping. Over the course of two summers, I had foot surgery and was non-weight bearing for 3 months. It takes a year or so for each foot to completely heal to where there is no pain at all. And... I ate because I felt sorry for myself.  I regained about half the weight I'd lost.

The weight gain happened gradually, but something more was back with a vengeance: the shaming voices in my head. With that came the dressing so as to disguise bumps and bulges that I hated--and, remember, I have a disorder which makes me see myself unrealistically. I automatically go to much larger sizes when I'm shopping because I see myself that way.  I crashed into the same wall of self-hatred that had kept me prisoner for most of my life.

I had to have a serious talk with myself, having worked so hard in therapy for six years to shed the shame of sexual abuse, become mentally strong, and exercise to manage stress had made me physically strong, too.  I had, at last, after a journey to Hell and back, discovered a sense of self-worth. These questions hung heavy over me:


                      AM I WORTH LESS AS A PERSON NOW BECAUSE I REGAINED WEIGHT?                                            SHOULD I HATE MYSELF NOW AFTER I WORKED SO HARD TO LOVE  MYSELF?

I realized what those who love me unconditionally have always known:  regardless of my body size, I am worthy of love. And I wanted to explore that idea--get inside the head of someone who hears the message of worthlessness from the very people who should love her unconditionally--and see what happens.

Just as I did a lot of healing work by writing COURAGE IN PATIENCE, HOPE IN PATIENCE, and (the thus far unpublished) TRUTH IN PATIENCE when I was in therapy, I decided to explore the issue of self-worth and weight by writing another novel. That novel is BIG FAT DISASTER:

Colby Denton's family is a "package deal". That's what her dad, a candidate for the U.S. Senate running on a “Family Values” platform, calls his wife, a former Miss Texas, and three daughters: Rachel, Colby, and Drew. Rachel and Drew inherited their mother's traditional beauty, but Colby takes after her father, a linebacker on his college football team.

Colby finds a photo of her father kissing another woman, and within hours, Colby's father admits that he is in love with his mistress. But that’s not all he’s been up to; he’s also been stealing from his campaign, and his investment company has been defrauding investors so that he can support his secret lifestyle.

His wife and daughters are not only the objects of media speculation; they're left homeless, too. The only person willing to provide them a place to live is Colby's eccentric Aunt Leah, resident of Piney Creek, a tiny East Texas town, the black sheep of her  image-conscious family, and mother to Ryan, the only player on his football team with the courage to report a girl’s sexual assault at a party.  His teammates are out for revenge, and Ryan has a grudge against the world. 

Piney Creek, Texas is tiny: Kindergarten through 12th grades are in the same building! But the social media network is huge, as Colby discovers. Her mother blames her binge eating and resulting weight problem for attracting negative attention, and Colby is driven to desperate measures. Tragedy ensues, and Colby keeps a secret out of fear that her mother will reject her once more if she finds out the truth.

At last, Colby must confront the truth about the tragedy, her role in the destruction of her family, and the eating disorder that will eventually kill her if she does not learn to cope in other ways.

The truth is not always pretty. But when everything else falls away, I know that truth is all that lasts.

Find me in these places online:

GoodreadsGoogle+   Official Book Trailer for Hope in Patience  Video of me reading a Dear Teen Me letter  My website
  Facebook  Twitter  Reviews of The Patience TrilogyReviews of Big Fat Disaster
Preorder BIG FAT DISASTER, releasing in ebook in March & hardcover in April, and check out my earlier books as well!
Amazon US, Amazon Canada, Barnes & Noble, IndieBound