Edward Hoornaert's Blog, page 42

Effing Feline burps

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As they say in the commercials . . . new name, same great book!

I, Effing Feline, thank you for all the cat treats you earned me by voting in Ed’s poll last week . (Burp) We have a winner in the exciting race to replace the name Audra Fleeing Audra Finding.

And the winner is (burp):

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Alien Contact for Runaway Moms

For the last few weeks, we’ve glimpsed Tal Pelletier’s misgivings about opening the doors to the abandoned underground city where he had lived when his wife and child died, before his people hopped Kwadra Island to this Earth. He waits so long his companion makes the first move.

Audra reached for one of the massive, marrel-plastic door handles and pulled, but it was too heavy for her.

When he grasped the handle to help, his finger grazed hers. She froze. She was a short, slight woman with delicate, haunted features; she had to tip her head back to meet his eyes, almost as though asking for a kiss. Just as he needed her spirit’s strength, she needed his physical strength — but not his lust, which was tainted with anger and depression. Never that.

So he kept his lips to himself. Together, they pulled open the door onto the ghosts of a past that had never existed.

Effing Feline here again. Cat oh cat, were those treats great. And so (burp) many of them! Be sure to check out the other writers in Weekend Writing Warriors and Snippet Sunday.

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Alien Contact for Runaway Moms

She’s running from an abusive lover…but what is she running to?

When her abusive lover tries to take custody of her baby, Audra flees where even he can’t follow: the aliens’ forbidden cities underneath Kwadra Island.

But can the safety she wants for her daughter survive a search party, violent alien criminals—and the love of an emotionally damaged Kwadran?

Effing Feline says Ed needs help #8sunday

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I, Effing Feline, think my pet human, is trying to trick me. Ed wants me to apologize for not getting to everyone’s post last week because he was busy with a July deadline. But I don’t believe that story. He just wants to trick me into saying the word sorry. I’ve never said that word, though, and won’t start now. So there.

He also wants me to wish those of you with frostbitten fingers a joyous and warm Canada Day. That I’m willing to do.

Today’s snippet is again from Ed’s WIP, the fifth book in his Alien Contact for Idiots series. It’s titled ??? (Yes, the question marks are intentional; see below.)

Last week Tal Pelletier, our flawed hero, hesitated before opening the doors to the abandoned underground city where he had lived before alien technology moved all of Kwadra Island to this Earth. His wife and child in the underground city.

If his family had never existed on this world, didn’t that mean that he didn’t exist, either? That everything he’d experienced since Kwadra hopped to this Earth was a delusion? Even this very moment?

A shiver of apprehension turned his spine into water, but he was too proud to let the crazy white lady glimpse his existential fears. She needed his strength and his pitiful stock of wisdom. To her, he was a symbol of the alien’s incomprehensible power, and that was as it should be. He must try to become that symbol for her, rather than a flesh-and-blood man with fears and demons and needs.

Needs — yes. Before he opened this door and faced his past, his ghosts, and his demons, he needed a drink. Quick, before his hands started shaking.

Effing Feline here again. I was right — it was a trick! Ed duped me! Right there in the second paragraph, he got me to say sorry.

Hiss! I did it again!

Check out the other writers in Weekend Writing Warriors and Snippet Sunday.

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Effing still here. Ed needs help. (By the great Queen of Catdom, does he need help!)

Help with a title, that is. You’ve read snippets of this book — and even if you haven’t, which these do you think is the best, most salable title for it? I get a cat treat for each submission, so please vote!

Take Our Poll

If you have a better suggestion, enter it in a comment. I get TWO treats for those. And if it helps, here’s the blurb:

When her abusive lover tries to take custody of her baby, Audra flees where even he can’t follow: the aliens’ forbidden cities underneath Kwadra Island.

But can the safety she wants for her daughter survive a search party, violent alien criminals—and the love of an emotionally damaged Kwadran?

Passing the Torch: Harlan Ellison is now On the Far Side

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On a day that science fiction master Harlan Ellison passed to the far side, it struck me that it seems appropriate to look back at Mr Ellison’s marvelous career, and forward, to some speculative fiction writers of the future . . . On the Far Side.

Harlan Ellison, 1934-2018

The number one thing that always struck me about Ellison’s work was his titles. Here are a few examples:

I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream
Crazy as a Soup Sandwich
From A to Z, in the Chocolate Alphabet
“Repent, Harlequin!” Said the Ticktockman
The Prowler in the City at the Edge of the World

How I wish I could dream up titles like these!

On the Far Side

The Futuristic, Fantasy, and Paranormal chapter of RWA runs an annual contest called On the Far Side. A number of years ago, after being traditionally published in both Contemporary Romance and Science Fiction, I wanted to blend my two interests and write Science Fiction Romance. I entered my first SFR effort, a near-future romance with the pseudo-Ellisonesque title of Alien Contest for Idiots.

I’m proud to say that the book was an On the Far Side finalist and is now book one in my 5-book Alien Contact for Idiots series.

The contest is special to me, so here are this year’s finalists:

Dark Paranormal

The Contract, by Eliza Fyre
Kingmakers by Margi Guilfoyle
In Blood and Ice* by Susan Person

Light Paranormal

The Brass Queen by Elizabeth Chatsworth
Images by Patricia Dane
Warrior of Eden by Fenley Grant

Science Fiction/Futuristic

The Brass Queen by Elizabeth Chatsworth
Touch 3.3 by Valen A. Cox
Kilroy Was Here by Janet Raye Stevens

Fantasy

The Dark Queen’s Daughter by Alexia Chantel
Valista by Lynn Harris
One If By Magic by Ann Campbell Reed

Urban Fantasy

Donovan Darling by Luna Joya
Dead Sure by K.A. Lannon
One Body, Two Deep by Toni J. Stephens

Erotic

Star Knight Errant by Shelley Blakeley
Severed Ties by T.J. Kyle
The Kes Effect by Lori Ono

Young Adult

The Golden Horn by Megan Bates
Weapon of Fire and Ash by B.M. Matsen
Saving Magic by Roh Morgan

New Adult

Field and Thorne by Amanda Marin
Saving Magic by Roh Morgan
A Bargain of Fear and Desire by Megan Van Dyke

Congratulations to all the finalists!

Your name is? #mfrwhooks

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Today, another hook from my WIP titled Audra Fleeing Audra Finding, book 5 in the Alien Contact for Idiots series.

Audra Verhailey, a runaway young mother, flees with her baby from Oregon to Kwadra Island. Kwadra is an alternate Earth’s Vancouver Island. The Kwadrans “hopped” their island to our Earth when the environment of their planet became so polluted and globally warmed that it was close to uninhabitable.

Kwadran Duchess Opsie Beaverpaw has agreed to lead the search for Audra. After meeting the runaway’s uncle, an unexpected visitor knocks on Opsie’s office.

A young woman walked in — or rather, glided in like a fashion model. Her expensive and tasteful white gown, pleated from neck to knees, emphasized both her height and her extreme slenderness. Her complexion was immaculate, which always roused a flicker of spiteful envy in Opsie she batted it away. This visitor was young, but how young?

“Allow me to hope,” Opsie said as he pointed toward a chair, “that you are Audra Verhailey and I don’t have waste my time searching the depths for you.”

The girl grinned, which made her look very Kwadran. “You don’t recognize me, Duchess?”

The girl sat like a model—or perhaps like someone with either massive innate elegance or training in appearing elegant: knees together and pointed to one side, hands folded in her lap. This youth would never sit with her feet up on the desk.

“I guess that means I should,” Opsie said. “Your name is . . . ?”

I’ll give you a tiny hint: the visitor is a young woman who played a major role in book two of the series, Alien Contact for Kid Sisters. Be sure to check out the hooks by other great writers in the Book Hooks blog hop.

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Audra Fleeing Audra Finding

She’s running from an abusive lover . . . but what is she running to?

When her abusive lover threatens to take custody of her baby, Audra Verhailey flees where even he can’t follow: the aliens’ forbidden cities underneath Kwadra Island.

But can the safe isolation she wants for her daughter survive a search party, a gang of alien criminals — and the love of an emotionally damaged Kwadran?

Effing Feline offers you a match #8Sunday

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I, Effing Feline, laughed so hard I coughed up not one but two furballs. The joke? The Merriam Webster dictionary, which defines “summer heat” this way:

[image error]As an Arizona cat, let me tell you that seventy-six is not “heat,” it’s the overnight low. For real heat, AZ style, light a match and stick your finger in the flame.

Today I’m changing things around, snippet-wise. The snippet is still from Ed’s WIP, a near-future SFR novel titled Audra Fleeing Audra Finding, but instead of seeing things from Audra’s point of view, today we visit the head of Tal Pelletier, the hero.

Penniless and desperate, Audra has let Tal, a Kwadran construction worker, guide her to a back entrance to Kwadra’s abandoned, underground cities.  In this scene, he ponders the doors to the underground Kwadran city. He had lived there until the island “hopped” from an alternate Earth to our planet, five years previously.

There they were: the gates to the underworld; to his past.

As Tal approached the double doors, he tried to swallow, but couldn’t. His mouth was too dry.

The doors were big enough to allow a Yeo truck to carry repair supplies into the ventilation tunnel. He hadn’t thought of those clunky but indestructible vehicles in years. The gigantic Yeo Corporation had never existed on this Earth.

He had never existed here, either, but then one day he did, and his prior life had instantly become nothing more than an unreal dream of an Earth that had never been. Manon had never existed on this world, nor little Theo, exactly Roxie’s age. But their nonexistent ghosts nonetheless existed here, behind these doors. How could a guy deal with ghosts that never were?

Effing Feline here again. Let me clarify my “real heat” comment up above. I personally have never stuck my paw into a flame. It would set my fur on fire, and the resulting singe mark would be akin to tagging the Mona Lisa.

You humans, being born pitiably naked, don’t have this problem. So go ahead, use the match.

Foreign Children

I usually eschew politics on this blog, but this resonates too powerfully for me not to share it.

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Hoping for Success #mfrwhooks

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Today, another hook from my WIP titled Audra Fleeing Audra Finding, book 5 in the Alien Contact for Idiots series.

[image error]Audra Verhailey, a runaway young mother, flees with her baby from Oregon to Kwadra Island. Kwadra is an alternate Earth’s Vancouver Island. The Kwadrans “hopped” their island to our Earth when the environment of their planet became so polluted and globally warmed that it was close to uninhabitable. Now there are two identical islands off the west coast.

Duchess Opsie Beaverpaw has agreed to lead the search for the runaway young mother. Here Opsie thinks about meeting the runaway’s uncle, Matt Verhailey, a Seattle cyber security expert who is searching for her.

“Until tomorrow morning, Matt.” Opsie extended her hand.

He shook it firmly but without the forceful aggression she hated in some of the American policemen she’d met—the ones who saw her as an uppity Injun and female to boot, or who resented that Kwadra had eclipsed the US in technology, or who disliked women in positions of power. She smiled her approval at Verhailey. So far, nothing disqualified him from becoming a short-term lover.

As she strolled back to her office alone, she created a list on her implant of things she needed to do before leaving early tomorrow morning. Plastering, thank the spirits, was not on the list.

When that was done and a dozen messages sent, she sat behind her desk with her feet on it. She stared at the unpainted ceiling.

Or rather, her eye pointed at the ceiling, but her mind’s eye concentrated instead on the prospect of returning home to Nuxalt. Her emotions were mixed, to say the least, and furious in their power. She would control those emotions by viewing the visit as a vacation whose purpose was the seduction of Matthew Verhailey.

She’d gotten used to fresh air, wind, and weather. Despite having lived most of her life in a cave, she didn’t feel like a subterranean creature. A shudder passed over her at the thought of rocks surrounding her, entombing her.

Nonetheless, Queen Elinor had chosen this task well. If the lost soul had been a young man, she would’ve refused to become troglodyte again, even though she liked men. Quite a lot, actually. More than they liked her, ever since marauders had scarred her, inside as well as outside.

But a young woman in trouble?

A new mother?

She’d never been a mother. Never would be. The marauders’ nightmare had ended all hopes of having a baby.

But that was precisely why she defended mothers so staunchly. As head of Kwadra’s gendarmerie, she’d fought to ensure that women received respectful treatment, and she’d pioneered programs geared toward helping the sort of problems young women faced so they wouldn’t have to deal with police, instead.

So, would she search for Audra Verhailey and her young daughter? Of course. The chances of finding her weren’t great, yet Opsie hoped for success.

Be sure to check out the hooks by other great writers in the Book Hooks blog hop.

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Audra Fleeing Audra Finding

She’s running from an abusive lover . . . but what is she running to?

When her abusive lover threatens to take custody of her baby, Audra Verhailey flees where even he can’t follow: the aliens’ forbidden cities underneath Kwadra Island.

But can the safe isolation she wants for her daughter survive a search party, a gang of alien criminals — and the love of an emotionally damaged Kwadran?

Effing Feline hates fixers

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My kitten who never was

I, Effing Feline, cannot celebrate Father’s Day, as I’m not a father . . .  because against my will, I was “fixed.”

Grr, hiss!

I’m choosing another snippet from Ed’s WIP, a near-future SFR novel titled Audra Fleeing Audra Finding. Penniless and desperate, twenty-something Audra lets a Kwadran construction worker guide her up a wilderness mountain to a back entrance to Kwadra’s abandoned, underground cities. She hopes to be safe there from the abusive lover, a lawyer who has vowed to get sole custody of her baby no matter where she hides.

Audra isn’t sure she trusts her construction worker guide enough for him to accompany her into the dark, secluded underground. We’re in her point of view.

But—

Yeah, but — he had a nice butt. Angels wouldn’t have bodies made for sin, right? Only devils.

“Oh, hell,” Audra said, “let’s go.” Unable to meet his gaze, she went to the opening of the ventilation tunnel. Wary of the jagged ends of the broken grate, she shielded Roxie with her hands as she stepped into the howling darkness.

When he followed, she let out a deep sigh. She hadn’t been sure he would. Her nerves were stretched too tightly for her to give him a smile or the reassuring hug she craved, so she gave him a flashlight, instead.

Effing Feline here again. I guess I’m supposed to wish a happy Father’s Day to all my readers — even the women. Men/women . . . same difference, right? You’re all huge and have warm laps. The differences, you must admit, are utterly insignificant.

Check out the other writers in Weekend Writing Warriors and Snippet Sunday.

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Audra Fleeing Audra Finding

She’s running from an abusive lover . . . but what is she running to?

When her lover threatens to take sole custody of her baby, Audra Verhailey flees where even he can’t follow: the aliens’ forbidden cities underneath Kwadra Island.

But can the safe isolation she wants for her daughter survive a search party, a violent gang of criminals — and the love of an emotionally damaged Kwadran?

An exquisite touch of distinction #mfrwhooks

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Today, another hook from my WIP titled Audra Fleeing Audra Finding, book 5 in the Alien Contact for Idiots series. Kwadra’s queen has twisted the arm of a reluctant Duchess Opsie Beaverpaw to lead the search for Audra, a runaway young mother. Here Opsie talks with the runaway’s uncle, Matt Verhailey, a wealthy cyber security expert who is searching for her.

“I have an important meeting with the Defense Department in D.C. in six days,” Verhailey said. The hair at his temple and above his ears was turning grey. A few years ago, that would’ve warned Opsie that he was probably too old, but now it seemed like an exquisite touch of distinction, earned by long life and, perhaps, suffering. “Think we can find her by then?”

“If she’s desperate to see the sun again and wants to be found, the chances are ninety-eight percent. But if she doesn’t?” Opsie shrugged.

Verhailey’s expression went still, as though he hadn’t liked what he’d heard. For her own sake, she hoped he’d call off the search because his meeting was too important. But she liked the way he looked, so for his sake she hoped family was more important than business.

“Audra isn’t my blood niece,” he said, and Opsie was disappointed. He was weaseling out of the search.

“She’s fiercely independent,” he continued, “and she might not want my help, but . . .” His conflicted frown made her want to soothe him by running her fingers through his graying hair. “But if anyone deserves my help, it’s Audra. I’ll need the rest of today to brief my partner about the Pentagon meeting.”

Be sure to check out the hooks by other great writers in the Book Hooks blog hop.

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Audra Fleeing, Audra Finding

She’s running from an abusive lover . . . but what is she running to?

When her abusive lover threatens to take custody of her baby, Audra Verhailey flees where even he can’t follow: the aliens’ forbidden cities underneath Kwadra Island.

But can the safe isolation she wants for her daughter survive a search party, a gang of alien criminals — and the love of an emotionally damaged Kwadran?

Effing Feline peers into the wolf’s mouth

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I, Effing Feline, think English is weird. Take the saying “Never look a gift horse in the mouth.” Why shouldn’t you? You can tell a lot by looking in a horse’s mouth, like its age and health. Right, Hywela?

“Gift cats,” of course, are different. Don’t expect a gift from a cat. Instead, shower your cat with gifts.

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Ed’s upcoming near-future SFR novel is Audra Fleeing Audra Finding. Penniless and desperate, twenty-something Audra lets a Kwadran construction worker guide her up a wilderness mountain to a back entrance to Kwadra’s abandoned, underground cities, where she hopes to be safe from the abusive lover who wants to take sole custody of her baby.

As they reach the ventilation tunnel that will allow her to visit the underworld, she asks her guide’s name. Talopas (Tal for short) means prairie wolf in his language. She tries to say goodbye, but he insists on accompanying her into the mountain.

“Why?” she said aloud; “what’s your angle, mister?”

He reached toward her chest, making her cringe back. Extending his index finger, he caressed Roxie’s cheek, and the baby gurgled.

“Oh.” So his selflessness had nothing to do with her? That was reassuring — or was it a tiny bit insulting, instead?

“Well, then . . .” She should be grateful to him, should smile and say thank you, should accept this token of the universe’s surprising love with grace and good humor. She grinned; what was that saying about not looking a gift wolf in the mouth?

Effing Feline here again. If you look a “Gift Wolf” in the mouth, all you’ll probably see is your nose being chewed. After all, wolves are related to (shudder) dogs.

So don’t peer into the mouth of a wolf, okay? If you need something to do instead, check out the other writers in Weekend Writing Warriors and Snippet Sunday.

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Audra Fleeing Audra Finding

She’s running from an abusive lover…but what is she running to?

When her lover threatens to take sole custody of her baby, Audra Verhailey flees where even he can’t follow: the aliens’ forbidden cities underneath Kwadra Island.

But can the safe isolation she wants for her daughter survive a search party, a violent gang of criminals—and the love of an emotionally damaged Kwadran?