Debbie Macomber's Blog, page 31

An Uplifting Valentine's Day

When we speak of Valentine's Day it's mostly related to romantic love.  Readers assume that because I write about relationships that involve romance, I must be some sort of expert in the field. They think Valentine's Day is a day meant for flowers, chocolates and wild passionate lovemaking .

I'd like to suggest we start a new trend when it comes to talking about love and Valentine's Day.  Instead of romance and seeking out that perfect someone who will love us the way we deserve, I think we need to start loving ourselves--not in a narcissistic sort of way but it a healthy, fun way.  For in loving ourselves we are able to love others.  Loving others becomes a reflection of how deeply we care about ourselves. 

A single friend once told me she wished to remarry.  She made a list of everything she was looking for in a husband and then worked on those very qualities in her own life.  She became the  woman that would attract the man she wanted.   So today on this Valentine's Day I'd like to declare it as “love yourself day” and just for fun, enjoy a really wonderful, decadent piece of chocolate.

The Love of a Friend

My life has been blessed with a number of wonderful friendships.  But God sent a special friend into my life at a time when I needed a good friend the most.  Back in 1986 our family moved to Port Orchard, WA (aka Cedar Cove) and as it happened, my next door neighbor was Linda Lael Miller.  Coincidentally, Linda had also published around the same time as I did and being able to commiserate about our fledgling careers and the craziness of raising children and keeping a home was heaven sent. 

As Linda and I walked around the high school track every afternoon we dreamed together, set goals, planned our careers and encouraged and supported one another.  We even opened a shared office out of the home—unheard of among our author friends!  And then Linda got wanderlust and moved.  She joked and said the neighborhood was going down hill.  She now lives in Spokane and while we don't see each other more than a couple of times a year, we still dream and plot and plan.  I am blessed to call her my friend, knowing that it’s a rare and special gift to have friendships that bridge both distance and time.   

Reflections on My Love Story

When Wayne and I first met I found him absolutely fascinating.  He was tall, blond and had robin's egg blue eyes I could melt in.  In addition he was smart and funny and he seemed to think I was beautiful.  Within a few weeks of our meeting I was convinced he was the one for me.  Sure enough, a year later we were man and wife.

I soon learned that what I felt for Wayne was only the first layer of what it means to love someone.  Love was nursing me through a bout of flu, or waiting 15 minutes longer after I assured him I was ready to leave but only had this one small thing I had to do.  Love was reaching for my hand during a scary part of a movie.  Love is finding a way to balance our monthly budget and still pay for Jenny Adele to take dancing classes.  It was driving Ted and Dale to their soccer practice after a long day working construction.  It was believing in me enough to say, "Write, Debbie, write, it's what you've always wanted to do, isn't it?"  That, my friends, is love.  Real love.

The Greatest Love Story I Have Ever Heard

I was once asked what was the greatest love story I had ever heard.  My mind wandered through history and there are certainly a number of amazing stories but the one that hits closest to home for me is that of my own parents.  My mom and dad met shortly before the outbreak of WWII.  When my father entered the service and learned he was about to be shipped overseas, he asked my mother to come to Georgia and be his bride. After a three day train journey, they were married in Macon, Georgia with two people they never saw again standing up as their witnesses.  Two days later my father was on his way to fight in Europe.  They didn't see each other again for over three years.  My father was captured and taken into the heart of Germany as a POW and returned weighing less than 100 pounds.  They were married for 60 years, through lean times and health issues and everything else thrown into a lifetime together.  It's not a fancy love story that would make headlines but nonetheless, a love story that has served as a model for my brother and me through our own lives.

The Way to Wayne’s Heart

Valentine’s Day can be pretty stressful for guys, especially those that aren’t the sentimental or romantic type.  My husband, Wayne, falls into that category.  You can imagine how much more stressful it can be for a guy married to a romance or women’s fiction author! 

Several years ago I came up with a proposal to ease Wayne’s fears and make Valentine’s Day fun for both of us—I do the planning!  This way I am able to show love for my husband, and he feels able to express his love freely instead of worrying about the pressure to perform or meet expectations.  

This Valentine’s Day weekend we’re driving from our Vero Beach home to Bonita Springs, FL, where I’ll be participating in the Florida Celebration of Reading fundraiser. It promises to be a wonderful event for a great cause!  From there, Wayne and I will drive to Redinginton Shores, FL to spend time with friends and explore more of the state we call home during the winter.  This year it’s a low-key Valentine celebration, but the main objective is to spend quality time together.  And car trips have always been enjoyable for us.  We talk, listen to a recorded book, and best of all, I’ll have special time with my Valentine.

My Word of the Year

Every year I choose a single word for the year.  I generally start thinking about it after Christmas, although every now and again a word will come to mind earlier and I'll get confirmation sooner.  

Last year my word was submit.    I can tell you up front submit isn't a word I would have chosen.  You can imagine it made my husband quite gleeful!  It took me far longer than it should have to realize God hadn't given me this word in regards to my husband but meant it in my relationship with Him.  I have this tendency to like to be in control.  There are days when even my prayers have claw marks as I tried to grab them back, thinking, "Hey, wait a minute, I can do that!"  Ha.  Big joke. 

My word for 2014 is light.  I like this word.  And frankly, being a light for God is my primary goal in this life.   So I'm gonna let this light shine and eagerly await how light will reflect on my year.  I’ll post a bit more about my word as the year develops.

A Taste of the Big Apple

I got caught up in the New York City rhythm last week while there for publisher and business meetings. I was wined and dined and loved trying out new restaurants.  On the heels of the holiday cruise, I still haven't had the courage to step back on the scale!

The highlight of the trip was a special Christmas gift that included a gift certificate to shop at Knitty City and tea at The Plaza.  The Plaza was elegant and I was thrilled to share it with friends Christina Skye and Nicky Epstein (pictured).  And yes, I did lift my little finger while sipping tea and munching on those delicate cucumber sandwiches—it just seemed the thing to do!

2014 Goals

My friend, Joan Johnston, spent the last couple of days with me and we worked on our goals for 2014.  The hardest thing for us as career women, and I'm sure many other working women, is finding balance in our lives.  The way Wayne and I have done it is to look ahead at the year and carve out time for each other, trips we want to take, people we plan to visit, and so on. Generally, I divide my goals into sections:  Family, Spiritual, Physical, Career, Recreational, and Financial.  

This year I've added another category: Knitting Goals.  I want to knit an Aran cable sweater with the yarn I purchased while in Scotland and have set aside five other projects to knit, and at the same time use my yarn stash.  I write this just before I leave for Vogue Knitting Live in NY . . . I will do my best to use restraint when it comes to purchasing more yarn, but from experience I can tell you the odds aren't good.

Christmas Cruising

Christmas this year was a whirlwind of activity as we raced to get all the last minute shopping, preparing and card writing finished.  We celebrated Christ’s birth together as a family early because Wayne and I were leaving for our winter home on December 23.   Leaving this early wasn’t the wrench it would have been because we knew we’d be together again on December 28th when we  boarded the Norwegian Epic for a Bahama Caribbean cruise.

Here we are boarding the cruise ship EPIC for our family vacation.  We sailed.  We ate.  We walked along sandy shores on exotic islands.  My daughters got mini braids in their hair—they look terrific!   We viewed fabulous night time entertainment.  We ate.  We took excursions and saw the local sights.  We walked from one end of the ship to the other.  

The food was amazing.  Wayne and I treated each family separately to a special dinner together at one of the high end restaurants.  Every dinner was a feast.  Breakfast and lunches too. Once home I waited three days before I had the courage to step on the scale.  Let's put it like this . . . I'm on a diet of bread and water for the next six months.  But the memories of our adventures together will sustain me!

 

Dreams Come True

I had the thrill of being able to make a dream come true for my two granddaughters, Maddy and Bailey.  They are huge fans of Corey Sevier, who plays Seth Gunderson in the Cedar Cove series on the Hallmark Channel.  Through a set of opportune circumstances, Corey was able to accept my invitation to join us during the Seahawk home game on December 22.   We kept it as a surprise for Maddy and Bailey.  To say they were over the moon is no exaggeration.  Corey, you are an absolute gentleman.  Thank you for joining us and making these two girls so happy.  I think I earned lots of grandmother points!  Even though the Seahawks lost, the Macomber suite was all smiles.