Buddy Wakefield's Blog, page 117

APRIL 2014

MARCH 2014

March 31, 2014 for Writer’s Week at Libertyville High School, 708 West Park Ave., Libertyville, IL (closed to public)

Kite Knife Overground

September 13, 2013

Big party tomorrow right here at home

with a band and a DJ, new homemade grill, camping, fire, friends and Mom!

Welcome to come if ya send me an email and happen to be around the Kitsap Peninsula.

This is about 4/5 through my first tile project, a water feature.

I know a lot of you have heard of gout, but did you know that you can also get grout?

I bought two bags.



Just finished it yesterday, and Steve made an outdoor kitchen.

Pretty excited about how they all turned out. Pics soon.

Elevator Music

September 10, 2013

Was a fine part of this life to roll

with a crew like that.



C.R. Avery, Rachel Kann, Michael Cirelli, Karen Finneyfrock, Mindy Nettifee, and Rachel McKibbens by my side prepping for an elevator tackle…

Crew Cut

September 10, 2013

Was a fine part of this life to roll

with a crew like that.

Uncle Bubby Goes Legit

September 6, 2013

I’m gonna be an uncle!

Congratulations to my sister, Sandy Beasley Roach, and James

to the big time! Huge smile.

In honor of uncle’s

I leave you with a spirit congrats and pic from Uncle Ricky.

Uncle Rick, you were Portland before Portland even tried lookin’ like Portland, man.



Love y’all.

Elliptically Correct

September 5, 2013

here I sit broken hearted swastika

f*** you f*** off f*** this

fags burn in hell

jesus was a truck driver [sh*t smear]

died for our sins on the cross

bore the burden is risen in the utmost

to the highest is my savior oh lord

obama bin laden suck bush [dry c*m drip]

need d*ck call harold call now for pu**y

don’t drop your toothpicks in the toilet

because the crabs will pole vault

To bathroom stalls and dressing rooms across America,

you have not yet revealed your full potential for progress

in the same way television has failed to release good news

and schools have failed to teach children from the get go

that everything is connected

though, I am impressed by your tendency

to accurately draw c*ck of various proportions.

In fact, the c*ck-to-vagina ratio

sketched on restroom and dressing room walls globally

is staggering to say the least.

Vaginas are just too complex I suppose.

But on July 11, 2007 there was discovered a dinosaur language

written as clear as the air itself; flawless like a tear duct.

Someone astonishing – among the mean graffiti swamp and fecal particulate –

had written on the agitated men’s restroom wall

at the Grog Shop in Cleveland, Ohio

with red marker inside a dirty white gangland tag, the following words:



Carley Auctel

You are beautiful

And you rock my socks

and you are PERFECT.

I remember the night I read that while peeing, tearing up

and worn down.

With thanks for Carley Auctel’s admirer,

Buddy

PS Happy would’ve-been-60th-birthday to my dad.

Accountability

September 4, 2013

Y’all remember when we rode bulls for Jesus?



Okay, maybe that was just me.

Fair enough.

Nonetheless, another indicator that man creates God in his own image

and/or interest.

HhhYah!

It’s worth noting

I was the president of the Christian Cowboys Friends & Fellowship

for a year in college, creating God in my image.

It also seems fitting to note how

The White Rabbit is said to be a symbol of human beings

who are often pompous and belittling

toward anything they deem less valuable than themselves,

yet they grovel to accommodate anyone from whom they stand to gain.



Until I became an adult, the only trophy I ever won

was for playing The White Rabbit in the eighth grade.

For those of you who had to – for many years –

deal with my sometimes belittling, aggressively groveling focus

on a compartmentalized white guy in the sky

to whom I gave my faith from a place of fear,

certain I would burn forever because I was born gay,

I not only apologize, but I would like to share with you in this moment of deep

compassionate laughter as a token of my/your/our progress.



NOTE: To every person of religious conviction and spiritual acceleration

reading this infinitesimal post, thank you for your awareness

that – despite my cheeky tongue and generalized religious references –

I deeply respect and appreciate your pursuit.

But check it out,

if your faith feels like an abusive juvenile corrections facility

or causes you to writhe with guilt to the point of needing medication in any form

or convinces you that there is a god hateful enough to stick you inside a pit of fire forever

just because you yearn to be your own savior

and your own rapture,

then I challenge you to find a god less cruel,

a god less like The White Rabbit.

Hot Tubs and Chuppahs

September 3, 2013

After officiating the Todd Sickafoose Ilana Umansky

ultimate wedding radness in Inverness, CA this weekend,

Steve and I took some time to keep the fun alive

by hiking near Golden Gate

with hundreds of tourists.

A nice Swedish man captured this exciting memory for us…



…then a few hundred feet later

there was a willing Grecian gentleman who agreed to snap more shots of the excitement:





CONGRATULATIONS to my dear friends Todd and Ilana

for a sincerely fun, funny and dancin’-filled weekend.

Y’all are the real goods.

All ways, Budderfield

PS I would also like to thank the iFart app

for making the completely full shuttle bus ride back to our car

a most memorable laugh-like-a-kid-in-a-quiet-church occasion.

Off the Top Turnbuckle

August 29, 2013

Why yes, yes I did clean out the office and find my my old WWF trading cards.