The Language of Letting Go Quotes

“We will face and deal with reality—on our own time schedule, when we are ready, and in our Higher Power’s timing. We do not have to accept chastisement from anyone, including ourselves, for this schedule. We will know what we need to know, when it’s time to know it.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“Today, I will watch myself and listen to myself as I go through my day. I will not judge myself for what I’m feeling; I will accept myself.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“Move when it’s time We were touring the ruins at Hovenweep National Monument in the southwestern United States. A sign along the interpretive trail told about the Anasazi who had lived along the small, narrow canyon so long ago. The archaeologists have done their best to determine what these ancient Indians did and how they lived their lives. The signs told about the strategic positioning of the buildings perched precariously on the edge of a cliff, and questioned what had caused this ancient group to suddenly disappear long ago. “Maybe they just got tired of living there and moved,” my friend said. We laughed as we pictured a group of wise ancients sitting around the campfire one night. “You know,” says one of them, “I’m tired of this desert. Let’s move to the beach.” And in our story they did. No mystery. No aliens taking them away. They just moved on, much like we do today. It’s easy to romanticize what we don’t know. It’s easy to assume that someone else must have a greater vision, a nobler purpose than just going to work, having a family, and living a life. People are people, and have been throughout time. Our problems aren’t new or unique. The secret to happiness is the same as it has always been. If you are unhappy with where you are, don’t be there. Yes, you may be here now, you may be learning hard lessons today, but there is no reason to stay there. If it hurts to touch the stove, don’t touch it. If you want to be someplace else, move. If you want to chase a dream, then do it. Learn your lessons where you are, but don’t close off your ability to move and to learn new lessons someplace else. Are you happy with the path that you’re on? If not, maybe it’s time to choose a new one. There need not be a great mysterious reason. Sometimes it’s just hot and dry, and the beach is calling your name. Be where you want to be. God, give me the courage to find a path with heart. Help me move on when it’s time.”
― Melody Beattie, More Language of Letting Go: 366 New Daily Meditations

“We are not meant to be just like anyone else.”
― Melody Beattie, More Language of Letting Go: 366 New Daily Meditations

“A magical potion is available to us today. That potion is called acceptance.

We are asked to accept many things: ourselves, as we are; our feelings, needs, desires, choices, and current status of being. Other people, as they are. The status of our relationships with them. Problems. Blessings. Financial status. Where we live. Our work, our tasks, our level of performance at these tasks.

Resistance will not move us forward, nor will it eliminate the undesirable. But even our resistance may need to be accepted. Even resistance yields to and is changed by acceptance.

Acceptance is the magic that makes change possible. It is not forever; it is for the present moment.

Acceptance is the magic that makes our present circumstances good. It brings peace and contentment and opens the door to growth, change, and moving forward.

It shines the light of positive energy on all that we have and are. Within the framework of acceptance, we figure out what we need to do to take care of ourselves.

Acceptance empowers the positive and tells God we have surrendered to the Plan. We have mastered today's lesson, and are ready to move on.

Today, I will accept. I will relinquish my need to be in resistance to myself and my environment. I will surrender. I will cultivate contentment and gratitude. I will move forward in joy by accepting where I am today.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“We’re learning, through trial and error, to separate our will from God’s will. We’re learning that God’s will is not offensive. We’ve learned that sometimes there’s a difference between what others want us to do and God’s will. We’re also learning that God did not intend for us to be codependent, to be martyrs, to control or caretake. We’re learning to trust ourselves. . . . and the power to carry that through.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“An unexamined life isn’t worth living, or so they say. The problem with living up to other people’s expectations too much is that it doesn’t leave us time to have a life. Take a moment. Ask yourself this question, and don’t be afraid to look deeply: Are you allowing someone else’s expectations to control your life? Examine the expectations you’re living up to; then live by your own inner guide.”
― Melody Beattie, More Language of Letting Go: 366 New Daily Meditations

“Here’s an interesting phenomenon about gratitude: it’s difficult to feel too bad when we’re feeling grateful. Your mind has room for only one thought at a time. If you fill it with gratitude, there isn’t room for negativity.”
― Melody Beattie, More Language of Letting Go: 366 New Daily Meditations

“Today, I will exchange a controlled life for one that is manageable.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“Letting Go of the Need to Control: April 27 The rewards from detachment are great: serenity; a deep sense of peace; the ability to give and receive love in self-enhancing, energizing ways; and the freedom to find real solutions to our problems. —Codependent No More Letting go of our need to control can set us and others free. It can set our Higher Power free to send the best to us. If we weren’t trying to control someone or something, what would we be doing differently? What would we do that we’re not letting ourselves do now? Where would we go? What would we say? What decisions would we make? What would we ask for? What boundaries would be set? When would we say no or yes? If we weren’t trying to control whether a person liked us or his or her reaction to us, what would we do differently? If we weren’t trying to control the course of a relationship, what would we do differently? If we weren’t trying to control another person’s behavior, how would we think, feel, speak, and behave differently than we do now? What haven’t we been letting ourselves do while hoping that self-denial would influence a particular situation or person? Are there some things we’ve been doing that we’d stop? How would we treat ourselves differently? Would we let ourselves enjoy life more and feel better right now? Would we stop feeling so bad? Would we treat ourselves better? If we weren’t trying to control, what would we do differently? Make a list, then do it.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“Surrender to love, without allowing people to control us or keep us from caring for ourselves. Start by surrendering to love for yourself.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“I still have bad days. But that’s okay. I used to have bad years. —Anonymous”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“It is time to stop this nonsense of running around picking on ourselves.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“The most important trust issue we face is learning to trust ourselves. The most detrimental thing that’s happened to us is that we came to believe we couldn’t trust ourselves.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“I can let go of things and people and my need to control today.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“We may have learned to habitually feel guilty as an instinctive reaction to life. Now we know that we don’t have to feel guilty. Even if we’ve done something that violates a value, extended guilt does not solve the problem; it prolongs the problem. So make an amend. Change a behavior. Then let guilt go.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“Before recovery, many of us lacked a frame of reference with which to name the victimization and abuse in our life. We may have thought it was normal that people mistreated us. We may have believed we deserved mistreatment; we may have been attracted to people who mistreated us.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“Today, I will strive for the balance between being too needy and not allowing myself to need people. I will let myself receive the love that is there for me.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“Someone may stand before us and hint or sigh about a problem, knowing or hoping that hint or sigh will hook us into taking care of him or her. That is manipulation.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“One of the greatest gifts we can give is an open, loving heart. And holding on to negative feelings from past relationships is our greatest barrier to that gift.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“Today, God, help me let go of negative thoughts I may be harboring about my past circumstances or relationships. I can accept, with gratitude, all that has brought me to today.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“Today, I will take responsibility for myself and show it to others by not allowing myself to be victimized. I cannot control outcomes, but I can control my attitude toward being victimized. I am not a victim; I do not deserve to be victimized.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“Other times, owning our power means we realize that we are being victimized by another’s behavior. Our boundaries are being invaded. In that case, we figure out what we need to do to take care of ourselves to stop the victimization; we need to set boundaries.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“Today, I will be gentle with myself, understanding that sometimes to reach the middle ground of balance, I need to explore the peaks and valleys. Sometimes, the only way I can extricate myself from a valley is to jump high enough to land on a peak, and then slowly ease myself down.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“In recovery, we learn we can shamelessly feel all our feelings, including anger, and still take responsibility for what we do when we feel angry. We don’t have to let anger control us, but it surely will if we prevent ourselves from feeling it.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“We have a right to set boundaries and to insist on appropriate treatment. We can separate another’s issues from our issues, and let the person experience the consequences of his or her own behavior, including guilt. We can trust ourselves to know when our boundaries are being violated.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“Much of the time, the things we feel guilty about are not our issues. Another person behaves inappropriately or in some way violates our boundaries.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“Feel the fear, then let it go. Jump in and do it—whatever it is. If our instincts and path have led us there, it’s where we need to be.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“Do we need to detach from someone who we’ve been trying to control? Is there someone we need to talk to, even though what we have to say may be uncomfortable? Is there someone we’ve been avoiding because we’re afraid to take care of ourselves with that person?”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

“We’re learning to acknowledge our power to take care of ourselves in our relationships. We’re learning to be intimate with people when possible.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency