The Confidence Game Quotes

“The confidence game—the con—is an exercise in soft skills. Trust, sympathy, persuasion. The true con artist doesn’t force us to do anything; he makes us complicit in our own undoing. He doesn’t steal. We give. He doesn’t have to threaten us. We supply the story ourselves. We believe because we want to, not because anyone made us. And so we offer up whatever they want—money, reputation, trust, fame, legitimacy, support—and we don’t realize what is happening until it is too late.”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“Gullibility may be deeply engrained in the human behavioral repertoire.”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“To do nothing is within the power of all men.”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“When it comes to you, I see clearly. When it comes to myself, I see what I want.”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“At some point, everyone will be deceived. Everyone will fall victim to a confidence artist of one stripe or another. Everyone will fall for it. The real question is why. And can you ever understand your own mind well enough that you learn to extricate yourself before it’s too late?”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“The simple truth is that most people aren’t out to get you. We are so bad at spotting deception because it’s better for us to be more trusting. Trust, and not adeptness at spotting deception, is the more evolutionarily beneficial path.”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“Human beings don't like to exist in a state of uncertainty or ambiguity. When something doesn't make sense, we want to supply the missing link. When we don't understand what or why or how something happened, we want to find the explanation.”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“He called it “egocentric anchoring”: we are our own point of departure. We assume that others know what we know, believe what we believe, and like what we like.”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“[O]ur minds are built for stories. We crave them, and, when there aren’t ready ones available, we create them. Stories about our origins. Our purpose. The reasons the world is the way it is. Human beings don’t like to exist in a state of uncertainty or ambiguity. When something doesn’t make sense, we want to supply the missing link. When we don’t understand what or why or how something happened, we want to find the explanation. A confidence artist is only too happy to comply—and the well-crafted narrative is his absolute forte.”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“Therein lies the power of the tale: it is a story of your exceptionalism.”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“Facts are up for debate. Stories are far trickier.”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“one study showed that having to pee made people more impulsive: they were so focused on exercising control in one area that their ability to do so elsewhere faded.)”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“As any good confidence man will tell you, someone who is emotional is someone who is vulnerable.”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“As any good confidence man will tell you, someone who is emotional is someone who is vulnerable. And as in that first rush of romantic infatuation, we abandon our reason to follow our feeling.”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“That’s not all. You also get a guaranteed return on your initial investment.” People who were approached with a that’s-not-all story, Burger found, were more likely to buy into it than those who heard the great offer right away. (The that’s-not-all-ing, incidentally, can continue for a while. You need not stop at one.) That’s-not-all is actually a member of a broader set of persuasive tactics, known as disrupt-then-reframe techniques. First you disrupt someone’s understanding of an attempt to influence her, and then you reframe the attempt in a way that makes her more vulnerable to it. Here’s how it works. Harvard psychologist Daniel Gilbert proposes that we understand the world in two stages. First we take it at face value, in order to decipher the sense of what someone is telling us. And then we evaluate it, in order to judge the soundness of what we’ve just deciphered. Disrupt-then-reframe attacks the evaluative part of the process: we don’t have a chance to give a proper assessment because each time we try to do so, the situation changes.”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“As the popular saying among scientists goes: genes load the gun; the environment pulls the trigger. The exact same traits could easily be put to use in more or less devious ways. The choice is not predetermined. And the presence of Machiavellianism or psychopathy or narcissism no more marks someone as a grifter than the presence of charisma or nonchalance.”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“We aren’t robbers, you and I. To rob a fool, you don’t need knives: Just flatter him, tell him sweet lies, And he is yours for life. —”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“The dark triad pushes people in the direction of manipulation—Christie and Geis found that the highest Mach scorers among doctors had consistently chosen to be psychiatrists, a field where manipulation and mental control are central, while, in a separate study, Machiavellian students were more likely to specialize in business and law than any other areas—but it does not compel them to push that manipulation beyond a point that’s generally socially accepted.”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“In the psychology literature, “Machiavellian” has come to mean a specific set of traits that allows one to manipulate others to accomplish one’s own objectives—almost a textbook definition of the con.”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“The real confidence game feeds on the desire for magic, exploiting our endless taste for an existence that is more extraordinary and somehow more meaningful. But when we’re falling for a con, we aren’t actively seeking deception—or at least we don’t think we are. As long as the desire for magic, for a reality that is somehow greater than our everyday existence, remains, the confidence game will thrive.”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“Give us a compelling story, and we open up. Skepticism gives way to belief.”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“Or, as one psychologist put it, “Gullibility may be deeply engrained in the human behavioral repertoire.” For our minds are built for stories. We crave them, and, when there aren’t ready ones available, we create them.”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“The true con artist doesn’t force us to do anything; he makes us complicit in our own undoing. He doesn’t steal. We give. He doesn’t have to threaten us. We supply the story ourselves. We believe because we want to, not because anyone made us. And so we offer up whatever they want—money, reputation, trust, fame, legitimacy, support—and we don’t realize what is happening until it is too late. Our need to believe, to embrace things that explain our world, is as pervasive as it is strong. Given the right cues, we’re willing to go along with just about anything and put our confidence in just about anyone.”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“Their genius lies in figuring out what, precisely, it is we want, and how they can present themselves as the perfect vehicle for delivering on that desire.”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“Cons work so widely because, in a sense, we want them to. We want to believe the tale. And we want to believe things that are too good to be true more than anything. Cons aren’t about money or about love. They are about our beliefs. We are savvy investors. We are discerning with our love interests. We have a stellar reputation. We are, fundamentally, people to whom good things happen with good reason. We live in a world full of wonder—not a world of uncertainty and negativity. We live in a world where good things happen to those who wait. The teller of the tale has us hooked.”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“Religion,” Voltaire is said to have remarked, “began when the first scoundrel met the first fool.” It”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“someone who is emotional is someone who is vulnerable”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“...our impulsivity and appetite for risk are some of the only reliable indicators of fraud susceptibility.”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“All you need is to be savvy enough to build an alluring storefront or craft a message that will hook your potential prey. (The bad grammar and seemingly implausible notes: those aren’t from stupidity. They’re actually well thought out beforehand. Scammers have learned the hard way that notes that sound too legitimate hook too many fish, making the weeding-out process incredibly costly. Now only the true sucker falls for the pitch.)”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

“When Shelby Hunt and Lawrence Chonko gave the Machiavellianism scale to one thousand professional marketers, they found that over 10 percent scored in the highest possible range—and far, far above the population average. In other words, they were among the highest possessors of traits that hinged on manipulation and deception. And yet, they engaged in a legitimate business. None of them were criminals. None of them were even aristocrats of crime.”
― Maria Konnikova, The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time