Shannon’s Reviews > Hit List > Status Update
Shannon
is on page 26 of 320
He smiled and it actually reached his eyes; it was a real smile, not Ted's smile, but Edward smiling. I didn't get to see the smile often, so I valued it when I did. I had to smile back. I shook my head, still smiling.
— Jul 10, 2011 07:41PM
This is an unedited paragraph, word for word from this page.
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Shannon’s Previous Updates
Shannon
is finished
I've learned you can fuck this many people, but you can't take care of this many people's emotional needs. You can fuck 'em, but you can't date 'em. Some of the men are happy with being fuck buddies, but most of them want more. People say that women are the romantic sex, but you couldn't prove it by my life. My boyfriends are all more romantic than I am, and so are my lovers.
— Jul 31, 2011 06:17PM
THAT'S how you end a book. Beautiful.
Shannon
is on page 318 of 320
Ahahahahaha! Olaf! Really? You've got to be shitting me! Seriously? Omg. ROFLOL.
— Jul 31, 2011 06:13PM
Shannon
is on page 318 of 320
Yaaaaay! You're not even giving me 10 pages, only 3, to wrap everything up. You vile, vile woman.
— Jul 31, 2011 06:11PM
Shannon
is on page 311 of 320
This whole part is so melodramatic and sappy it's making my teeth hurt.
— Jul 31, 2011 06:04PM
Shannon
is on page 304 of 320
Only Anita could make decapitations boring.
— Jul 31, 2011 05:54PM
They got settled over the sleeping vampires. I counted, motioned, and their swords were a shiny blur. Two heads came off and rolled away from the bodies. The third head took a second blow. I stared at Thaddeus, who had needed two blows.
"The angle wasn't perfect," he said.
I said, "I'm with him, you had all the time in the world to set up your angle."
Yaaawwwn.
Shannon
is on page 301 of 320
Lisandro grabbed my arm and spun me around to look at him. "Anita, I'm the muscle, you're the brains. Think of something!"
Oh man, you guys are seriously FUCKED if Anita is the brains of this operation.
— Jul 31, 2011 05:42PM
Oh man, you guys are seriously FUCKED if Anita is the brains of this operation.
Shannon
is on page 300 of 320
I feel like I'm being punk'd. No, really. I have 20 pages left and the ACTUAL PLOT has yet to start. Really. 20 pages. You're going to wrap this up in 20 pages. Someone shoot me now.
— Jul 31, 2011 05:34PM
Shannon
is on page 298 of 320
Having Olaf die in the line of duty would solve so many problems, but he was a good man in a fight and he was a fellow marshal. I couldn't wish him dead.
— Jul 31, 2011 05:30PM
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? HE'S A SERIAL KILLER. Anita, you are retarded. Not just stupid, but mentally challenged. Oh, he's good in a fight but he likes to kill and rape women who look like me. Let's be best friends forever!
Shannon
is on page 298 of 320
So you don't even need to touch Anita's magical cooch to be ensorcelled anymore: petting her hair will suffice.
— Jul 31, 2011 05:25PM
Shannon
is on page 296 of 320
So, Anita has been kidnapped, but the one main bad guy leaves the room and her other two captives decide, what the hell, let's release her? There is no tension, nor conflict, nor real danger at all in this book. Except for the water stains. WATCH OUT FOR THE WATER STAINS.
— Jul 31, 2011 05:06PM
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Desperado
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Jul 10, 2011 07:46PM
Alliteration station! I bet Anita wants to hump Ted/Edward's smile.
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That is one thing she's never done. I'm hoping he would try to kill her if she ever attempted to sleep with him.
It's gonna happen one of these days. Mark my words. There is no line LKH won't cross. Prepare to get Rick Rolled.
I bet she sleeps with Olaf first. I'd put money on that.
Please god, let her try. Edward only has to get lucky once and bam, no more Anita. An embarrassing way for her to get taken out but few would see it coming.
I thought I was a masochist-until I met Shanwow & found out about her unhealthy obsession with reading LKH. *bows down to the master* I quit after
& gave books 1-10 to Goodwill.
I get an odd sense of achievement when I finish a book like this. I tell myself the only reason I continue with this series though, is because I was invested in them long before they were terrible. It's hard to just drop the world and characters you've spent so much time with, even if they make you see red.Plus, I think my status updates are hilarious, but only because the material she gives me is so rage-inducing.
Ahhhh, the pure joy I am experiencing knowing I am not reading this.
Really??? You don't want to read it??? Even a little bit???
