Drymice > Recent Status Updates

If I was a vampire I would legitimately try to dig to China

I feel so much joy when I realised I could just take notes instead of answering questions

I’m stuck in Alabama rn but I realised I never appreciated how funny it looks

I liked iow Victor was calling his assistants mos but then like three pages later he says “He's got ears like Dumbo, but whatever. I guess I'd do him if I was a fag,” like this book is really amusing me and he haven’t gotten to the weird doppelgänger or whatever part

She’s boring but the flamingos are a nice touch. At least I’ve learned about different methods of boarding airplanes

Falling asleep

I’m going to ignore what she was doing with those plants for the sake of my sanity

Going gorge to sleep with your cousin and talk about how your mother slept with you and her father 🥰

I thought he was in love but no he’s a murderer

If I were in the colonies I’d probably go to Penn, but now I’d pick W&M

If my wife was in a relationship with her father I would beat her too

I strive to be a colonial painting of a child

I’ve been having the trippiest dreams because of this book

That’s so nasty if I could only eat live birds I would just kill myself

Every book I touch has a hint of incest

Frankly I don’t care about the Spanish

Bro what is wrong is with janitor

Cecelius Calvert in that one drawing night haunt me

One story in and this is already crazy

I just wanted to take a nap but no colonization gets in my way

The time skip from 14000 bce to the 1300s ce is funny for some reason

Eating people is kinda smart

The term “slutlamp” is actually so funny