Kay (Katie) Hansen

“I remember the thing
that I saw on Tumblr,
how people with trauma
will sometimes reexpose
themselves to it,
salt in the wound
to stay alive.

I am tired
of salting the wound -
I am ready
to salt the earth.”
― Olivia A. Cole, Dear Medusa

“We're pulling into the parking lot
when he finally speaks
asks me why

I don't run track anymore:

I was so good
I was so fast
Didn't I set a record

Yes I was
Yes I was
Yes I did

But I don't say it out loud: those words
have sharp edges and snag
in my throat. Instead I say

'I just have other priorities right now'
and am out of the car
before he can ask what they are,
before he can see
the tears that emerge
for the first time since
the Day.
'Thanks for the ride, though”
― Olivia A. Cole, Dear Medusa

“And then the whisper becomes words:
'You could run again.'
'You could run in college.'
'Coach Young always said you could.'
'You could go to the Olympics.'

And that's where I smash the whisper with my fist,
because sometimes it seems absurd to wish
for things I know I don't deserve

How could I?
Look what I am.”
― Olivia A. Cole, Dear Medusa

“I read an article about mass shootings
and how when a person survives one
in a movie theater perhaps
they may never go to the movies again.

The wide dark,
the silver glow,
only the narrow aisles
for cover...

it's all too much.

Sites of trauma.

And I think that school
has obviously become
a site of trauma for me

but so has Kroger
and the park
and sometimes
the bus

even though it also
a vessel of freedom.

But the thing that all
of these sites have in common
is my body,
and I wonder
sometimes
how you avoid a site
of trauma when the site
is your own self
and I think the answer is
you stop thinking of the body
as yours
and maybe that makes it
easier to walk
inside it.”
― Olivia A. Cole, Dear Medusa