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The Language of Flowers
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August Group Read- The Language of Flowers
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Mod
What is your opinion of Victoria? Did you like her? Dislike her? Feel sorry for her? Do you think her character was realistic?
Sheila...I read this book because I loved the title. It sounded Victorian and yet modern and intriguing. We've know that plants are sensitive, they respond when you water them and talk to them, but we forget they also have healing qualities! Our bodies react to their chemicals. Any character raised as a foster child is instantly sympathetic. I was drawn in by Victoria's past and sometimes liked her, and sometimes disliked her. At times her character was a little unrealistic, but the writing was lovely, and that to me is the most important thing! I would give it 4 stars becoz of the writing. Thanx!Kiana Davenport, author of OPIUM DREAMS & THE SPY LOVER
I thought this story was nicely told. The writing neither overwhelmed nor underwhelmed the narrative. Generally, I found Victoria to be realistic. The ending seemed to wind up too neatly. I don't believe that people let go of lifelong behavioral patterns as quickly as she seems to be doing. But, I also realize that the publishing industry favors happy endings. I did not find most of the circumstances surrounding Victoria's adult life to be credible. I found Grant to be an idealized romantic hero. When she walks in after a prolonged absence and the roasted chicken dinner is ready to come out of the oven because he was watching for her, my eyes nearly rolled backward in my head. I also did not find her professional success credible. Who hires a unbathed, disheveled, sullen homeless woman on first meeting and starts to pay her enough money to live on a partt-time wage? Who gets a business going with so little experience, no capital, in a few months time and has bookings ten years into the future?
I wasn't disappointed by the unrealistic parts of the story. To be the flowers had some magic in them and that made the story okay by me. I also really enjoyed the writing. Not over the top, but nicely done.
I really loved this story and felt that it was extremely well done. The characters, though flawed, were very real. I wanted to really dislike Victoria and really at times there was very little to like about her, but I came to have a connection to her character that was both pleasant and inspiring.I came upon this book quite by accident since I confused it with The Language of Trees which was the one I was looking for. I was very glad I did, however, as I oftentimes feel that books you stumble upon that are wonderful are such special treats. I think the author, a new novelist, in her first novel, did a remarkable job.
Marialyce wrote: "I really loved this story and felt that it was extremely well done. The characters, though flawed, were very real. I wanted to really dislike Victoria and really at times there was very little to l..."Yes, this is an nice book. I've recommended it to others. It has a bit of everything in it. A love story, trials, magic, nature, hard work ...
Mod
That part confused me. Did Elizabeth ever realize that Victoria set the fire and not her sister? Grant clues her in to the fact that his mother is unraveling. Yet, she leaves him alone to care for her with no support system. Elizabeth is so compassionate to this foster child. She has an excellent ability to break through her resistance. But, she does not display that same ability or passion for her nephew. There is an issue with Elizabeth's parents. Did they also experience mental health illness? If so, all the more reason to be driven to rescue Grant. If Catherine is stockpiling flamable liquid in the house, he is in physical danger. Why not seek out professional help for her sister and her nephew. Why not foster Grant while Catherine is hospitalized.
Mod
I'm only 35% in and so have not read the above comments. I already got too many hints of what's to come from scanning. So far, however, I am LOVING this book. The descriptions of Victoria's life (lives, really, considering all the homes she's been in) are sad and heartbreaking. Though I've yet to find out why Victoria leaves her, I really like Elizabeth, especially her patience and compassion for Victoria.I will chime back in once I've finished. Great pick!
Marialyce wrote: "I really loved this story and felt that it was extremely well done. The characters, though flawed, were very real. I wanted to really dislike Victoria and really at times there was very little to l..."I love your response and felt just like you. I liked this book better Than the Language of Trees, also!
Mod
Great Abby! We look forward to hearing back from you.
Another question:
How did you feel about Victoria and her attempt at being a mother? How did you feel about how she handled this situation? What were your thoughts when she left the baby in the room alone? When she left the baby at Grant's house?
My heart was in my throat when she left that baby home alone. I realize that she was overwhelmed and that she had no experience with parenting a baby. Nonetheless, I could only foresee disaster. Of course, there was none. Victoria's desire to breast feed and keep the baby from crying was clearly an element to convince the reader that she desired to be a good mother, to demonstrate her capacity for selfles love. It gave the reader sympathy for Victoria prior to her leaving the baby at Grant's house. However, I was put off when she left the baby at Grant's house without actually giving the child to him. What if he had gone away for a couple of days? was in a car accident and was in the hospital for a few days? if...? She simply assumed that he would come home when he usually did and that all would go well. That is great in novels when the author can determine the course of events, but horrible in real life. It certainly was a bit of a fairy tale ending as the Prince Charming simply takes over the parenting of this child, the same child whose birth she tried to hide from him, gets a receptive aunt to care for the child, again one who has the time and desire to do this even though both parents had been estranged from her for years, and all can live happily ever after.
Mod
Irene, you make a good point. This was a bit of a fairy tale, "and they all lived happily ever after" ending.
In the real world, what do you think would have been the outcome in a case like this?
Since I am an optimist, I have to say that my hopes would be for Victoria to be happy and successful. We hear so many stories of hate, of deceit, of horrible happenings, that I would have to think that every so often good things happen to people who deserve for them to happen. I think the ending fit right in with my philosophy of life. :)
In the real world...? I think that Victoria would have taken many years and relationship mistakes before she learned to trust, to be vulnerable, to be willing to settle down, etc. If she were lucky and sufficiently wise, she would spend time with an excellent counselor. In the real world, she would have kept the child because she did not want to put another child through the trauma she lived through. But, her parenting would have been more flawed than the average. She would live with the regrets. She would learn from the mistakes. And her daughter would be better off than she was, although far from having what most of us would call a good family life.
In the real world, I don't think there are "grant", young men who are totally selfless, infinitely patient and understanding, financially independant, tenderly drawn to a young woman who does everything possible to push him away, etc. In the real world, if the baby's father was someone with good family background who loved kids, he would have been very cautious of allowing Victoria to have unsupervised custody of that baby. I know that I would never want my infant or toddler in the care of an adult who left an infant unsupervised in a house just assuming I would show up in a timely fashion and not checking back for a year. That shows very poor judgement in my opinion, a judgement so poor that future trust with a child would have to be earned and earned again.
I really liked the writing style of this book and the way that the author went back and forth between Victoria's present and past so that we could see both her current state and how she got there.One of the things that I liked the most was the way that Victoria adopted the use of flowers to communicate and these served her when her own ability to find the right words was lacking. This told me that she would find her own way to survive and that it might not be in the conventional manner.
Mod
I have to say that her communicating with flowers, even if those she was communicating did not know what she was saying, was one of the most charming parts of the book for me.
So, did everyone look up their favorite flowers in the back of the book, and see what their meaning was? Were you surprised at any?
For me, my favorite flower has always been daffodils in the spring, which mean "new beginnings". (appropriate for a spring flower). I also love lilac, which mean "first emotion of love". But one of my favorite herbs is basil, and I keep basil plants growing in my kitchen in pots for cooking. But basil means "hate". hmm.... Guess that means I just keep my basil to myself! LOL
What are the meanings of everyone elses favorite plants and flowers?
Mod
Victoria is also often hungry and malnourished as a child, and food takes on a meaning of more than nourishement to her? What did you think of this, and what did you think on how the foster care system was portrayed?
I thought Diffenbaugh did a good job weaving together the past and present threads. I was never lost or confused by the jump in time. The clues about past events were revealed in a good pace so that I wanted to know what had happened, but never felt as if the past revelation was irrelevent, came too late to make me care any longer.As for the foster care system... I recently read "White Oleander" which gave a far more brutal picture, depicting all foster care homes as psychotic:hypocritical religious fanatics, mney-grubbing sadists, suicidal depressed needy adults, drug pushers, etc. This gave a balanced cast of characters, from the exhausted to the compassionate, to the inept.
Sheila wrote: "Abby wrote: "I'm only 35% in and so have not read the above comments...I will chime back in once I've finished. Great pick!"Great Abby! We look forward to hearing back from you.
Another question..."
I was upset reading about Victoria's trials as a mother because Mother Ruby did not do more to help her. The first couple weeks as a breastfeeding mother fill you with all sorts of happy hormones and it's easy to see any mother as taking it in stride. However, no advice was given to a 20-year-old single mother about what to do after the happiness starts to wear off. This ruined my otherwise wonderful feeling about Mother Ruby.
As for Victoria's actions with a newborn, I found this to be the most realistic part of the story. So often parents are overwhelmed, emotionally, physically, and in many other ways. To give birth and be responsible for a child when you have never seen someone care for a child in a sensible way - to have never had a connection with a parent - to have only begun to discover how to take care of yourself - I find it amazing that Victoria lasted as long as she did. Being a parent is so incredibly hard, even for people from so-called "good homes". Recognizing that and allowing others to make mistakes parenting requires a lot of compassion for overwhelmed parents. That Grant and Elizabeth did this for Victoria was a great (if unrealistic) happy ending for me.
Mod
Sheila wrote: "Abby, I also thought that Mother Ruby should have done more to help Victoria. Being a midwife, she should have realized that Victoria needed help, and that hiding in her closet room with the baby w..."Yes - I agree about Mother Ruby. I thought she wasn't a very good midwife but this may be the reality in many situations where the mother is poor and can't afford to pay. Victoria got shallow help most of the time, but nothing that could sustain her long enough to make a difference.
Mod
I really enjoyed the discussion of flowers as communication. I also enjoyed the relationship between Victoria and Elizabeth. I love that Elizabeth took in Victoria unconditionally, and let Victoria be who she needed to be and get out the emotion she needed to work through. I would recommend the book to other women because it was a quick read that was intelligent and different.
I would recommend the book to others because it was well written and I liked the way the author addressed the brokenness of people in relationships.
I agree with those who said that Mother Ruby should have done more to help. I understand that she seemed to trust Victoria, but to just leave a young mother with no family to raise the child with such infrequent check ups seemed odd to me. I'd think with all her experience, she would have come by more.
Mod
The more I think about Mother Ruby, the more it is strange, and just wrong, that she did not do more to help Victoria.
Hi Sheila, thanks!I was also glad that Victoria and Elizabeth were able to reconcile. It was also good that Elizabeth got to take care of Hazel, because she always felt like a mother to me and was clearly heartbroken over her decade away from Victoria.
So if you have something you would like to say, share, ask, or have discussed about this book, please don't hesitate to chime up.
I will leave this comment at this for now, and welcome everyone who is reading or has read this book. If the discussion slows down, I will add in questions from the discussion guide at the back of the book.
Happy chatting ladies, and Wisteria!